"I Can’t Get Over My Ex...Please Help Me Move On!”

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 8 ม.ค. 2025

ความคิดเห็น • 311

  • @krishna335
    @krishna335 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +604

    Stop pedestalizing the person, look at the situation objectively for what it is, follow strict no-contact, and invest heavily in your overall growth. This, too, shall pass.

    • @Justgirliethings6
      @Justgirliethings6 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      AMEN

    • @ItSpooling_
      @ItSpooling_ 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

      So robotic, whatever happened to having mother natures way and just feeling and healing.
      No wonder most of yall are single

    • @shatakshipandey8014
      @shatakshipandey8014 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

      ​@@ItSpooling_yeah , I agree. If you want him, and actually genuinely love him, try working it out. But if it's going nowhere, the best thing is to walk away.

    • @ItSpooling_
      @ItSpooling_ 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@shatakshipandey8014 while I do agree, some effort goes a long way.
      I do like some of the advice this guys puts out, but I’ve dated a few women who follow him and they just act so robotic, it’s so weird interacting with a woman who’s following rules and acting against her nature.
      Either way best of luck to y’all

    • @priyankav9792
      @priyankav9792 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

      Yes just maintain no contact at any cost and eventually you will get over and your self growth will boost your confidence.

  • @buildingjoy7896
    @buildingjoy7896 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +87

    What helps the most is knowing other people go through this also.

    • @MultiPrincelove
      @MultiPrincelove 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Especially when they describe exactly how you feel...

    • @ceciliag.l.2616
      @ceciliag.l.2616 หลายเดือนก่อน

      But it's so horrible to know that you're ex didn't care about you half as much as you cared about him...

  • @NakedTruthbyDrMelanie
    @NakedTruthbyDrMelanie 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +66

    17:30... if we can just connect the dots and see that person not as a"negative trigger" but as the one you can (secretly) thank for "triggering" your growth, it's actually liberating. You are empowered into the higher self-worth you deserve. 💗

  • @LKC2104
    @LKC2104 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    This is helpful to hear. What I did ( and still do as break up is fresh) is listen to a TH-cam where the first words were: “if someone one walks away from you- let them go.” Some ppl are in our lives for a season and when that’s over… we have to grieve the loss. Not romanticize what we thought it was or could be. The right person, cannot enter until we grieve the loss and realize that we are valuable. Rejection hurts. But I believe God has another plan and with our growth, we will be open to a better relationship. Right now it sucks. So the trigger part is very helpful

  • @bexsolo369
    @bexsolo369 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +35

    I was addicted to alcohol for many years, which oddly seems very relevant to this conversation. Many times I asked, why me? Why did this happen to me? But now, 9 yrs later, I am so thankful. Those years of being a slave to a substance (somewhat like being a slave to your feelings for an ex) taught me unparalleled empathy for others. I care so much for the well-being of others now, I'm so much less judgemental and so much more accepting and loving. I wouldn't change any of it. I actually really really like who I am, I like that I have a new way to connect with others❤

  • @anneliesewright662
    @anneliesewright662 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    I dove deeper into self-development & blossomed as a result of this pain. I have a new standard now to never settle again for less dignity & respect than I deserve. You're right! What's going to come from this is amazing, profound & beautiful. Thank you so much!

  • @Oohthehumanity
    @Oohthehumanity 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +78

    Loved Audrey's point about the physical & even neurological aspects of love and breakups - that our body has 'recorded' the relationship and it's part of our brain's stimuli-emotion experience. Those first days of knee-jerk 'Oh, I can't wait to tell them..' and then UGH..that sick feeling or even sensation of physical pain.
    Thinking back to early days after a breakup, it felt like my brain's wiring & associations with him was like a knotted up wad of Christmas lights in my head. ALL the wires and bulbs are so tightly intertwined and it feels like untangling is impossible. But slowly, slowly....and relief does come. Matthew would say 'growth'.. ;)

    • @ParisianThinker
      @ParisianThinker 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Never a comment on unexpected widowhood. Both have zero experience with anyone over 40.

    • @Oohthehumanity
      @Oohthehumanity 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@ParisianThinker Very same concepts over 40.. Trust me :)

    • @talesfromtheroad9530
      @talesfromtheroad9530 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yes exactly!!

  • @the.toxic.phoenix
    @the.toxic.phoenix 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +267

    I hate the whole "if you weren't hurt by this person you wouldn't have gone through this excellent growth" - growth can happen in loving supportive relationships. Yes, look at the positive if you've been through crap, but don't attribute the good things to the crap things. We shouldn't have to go through the hurt.

    • @yommatarin1474
      @yommatarin1474 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      Not as much we learn from getting hurt

    • @lunarose9042
      @lunarose9042 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@yommatarin1474 This is false in response to interpersonal relationships and we have data in many spaces showing this. We developed better interpersonally via healthy relationships.

    • @lmbgemini
      @lmbgemini 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      The crap thing about my ex was that he broke up with me and broke my heart. I mostly had no problems in our relationship.

    • @jenninemorel7693
      @jenninemorel7693 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

      We shouldn't have to go through hurt to learn but if you never were hurt or in a situation where you got hurt would you truly learn?
      I think not.
      True learning comes from experience not theory.
      It's like the difference between getting an education in school and then actually having the job or fantasizing about something like owning a home and then actually owning one.
      There is real value to actually experiences.

    • @percyb8268
      @percyb8268 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      Hmmm.. that's a very cynical and narrow perspective but I can respect that. I don't think we're attributing good things to crappy things here; You're generalising and that's not the point. But I think they're simply saying good things CAN come from crappy experiences. That's all.

  • @msl2796
    @msl2796 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +96

    Its been almost 4 months. I can’t stop thinking about this person on a daily basis, it feels overwhelming, exhausting and repetitive. The gut dropping feeling just won’t go

    • @jaimexcas
      @jaimexcas 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +25

      Ill tell you a hard truth, you will never stop thinking about that person for a while. The thing is it will mean bit less everyday until you realize that you actually remember the situation not the person, and eventually you will stop thinking about that person. However, in the future you still think about that person but you ll be ok.

    • @doglover5519
      @doglover5519 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      It's so hard!! I love him and want to be with him but he's ignoring me. He lost his job 7 weeks ago and I think he's really depressed.

    • @jaimexcas
      @jaimexcas 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @msl2796 I agree. If it is taking this hard for you, maybe you need professional help. There is nothing wrong with that.

    • @sabinasb2445
      @sabinasb2445 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      ​@@doglover5519, what do you love about a person who is ignoring you? Emotional and psychological abuse? It's a trauma bond ain't love. Waky waky waky

    • @denisa239
      @denisa239 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      I completely understand and know that feeling. Been there 2 years ago and I unfortunately still grieve over the breakup. I’m still heartbroken and not over my ex😢

  • @christinamarti4441
    @christinamarti4441 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +36

    Clementine story was precious Audrey is sweet and so on point

  • @BooklerNatsu
    @BooklerNatsu 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    Love all of Audrey’s points in this episode. Really needed to hear they. I think we all need to remember to not be so harsh on ourselves when trying to get over our exes. Thank you so much for making an episode on this topic.

  • @julitaserrano5550
    @julitaserrano5550 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +36

    Or, he shows up in your dream, and that disturbs your day, and bothers you as to why he was there when you're not doing too bad.

    • @akrico1
      @akrico1 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Ugh, exactly what I woke up to this morning. Ex wife was in my dream. Crazy vivid, in color.

    • @farflownfalcon1076
      @farflownfalcon1076 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Same. I felt I was making progress, and then a dream I can't even remember came along and demolished me

  • @elenakraykova1541
    @elenakraykova1541 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +32

    I like listening to Matt and some of the things he says make a lot of sense. Still, they make sense mostly for 20-somethings getting over a breakup. How can you block your ex when you need to co-parent? When they have a new family and your kids need to fit in somehow? All the logistics? You cannot block this person for at least 18 years, if you want your kids to have their other parent. You have to be civil with the person who has hurt you the most, for 18 years. There is no forgetting. No moving on. It's in your face every day. Blocking someone on the internet is easy. Blocking them from your life when you need to communicate effectively with them every single day is not.

    • @anastasiaz.4977
      @anastasiaz.4977 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      THIS!!

    • @acaudill06
      @acaudill06 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Yep. This is exactly where I am.

    • @MarianneMcPherson
      @MarianneMcPherson 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Agree

    • @MarianneMcPherson
      @MarianneMcPherson 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      That is my situation

    • @MikeGainsM
      @MikeGainsM 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      Block them on all social media channels so you’re not seeing their life/pictures. If need be, tell them you’re doing this so you can heal and move on from them and not to be malicious. Keep communication limited to only phone calls and texts about necessary logistics. After time and when you find someone else, those feelings become a lot less intense as you’re focused on your life and growth. You’ve got it!

  • @iconoclastic-fantastic
    @iconoclastic-fantastic 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

    It's funny, I watched this to aid in fully letting go of my situationship. But what I needed to hear most was that quote from the boxing coach and that whole story...in addition to the "break up" (can you even call it a break up in a situationship? no matter-), literally every major area of my life has fallen apart dramatically and I feel like I'm trying to climb out of the deepest pit of hell every day. Hearing that quote & story literally made me cry and gave me some hope, so thank you

    • @lmiller1413
      @lmiller1413 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Right? A tsunami hut along with the break up.

    • @TheLitSpirit
      @TheLitSpirit 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Hey, I hope by now you're feeling a bit better as some time as gone past. Often times it may seem as though everything is going wrong, luck has left you and the universe has done you dirty; but we as humans have a very limited view on what's actually going on behind the scenes. You're a new version of yourself now. The world we experience is a reflection of us. You have changed, so your world must change. Things can no longer remain the same. So although things appear to be falling apart, really what's happening is a reconstruction with an outcome well worth the temporary discomfort of the disassemblement process. Which is usually very painful - the ego likes to hold tight onto things and this harsh grip is what hurts.

    • @iconoclastic-fantastic
      @iconoclastic-fantastic 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      @@TheLitSpirit I really needed to hear this. Things have still been rough, and I'm trying to figure out who I even am anymore with all of these changes. It's hard. The only conclusive thing I've really come to is that I want to go to mortuary school to become a funeral director and be of service to families in their grief. Funnily enough, this ex situationship is a mortician. I had thought about pursuing the field for years and when it ended between us, I had to reflect and think "What are some objective qualities about this person that I was attracted to that reflect what I want for myself?" and that is a big conclusion I came to. I'm not sure if I would have arrived at this place and seriously undertake (no pun intended...lol) going to mortuary school and finally acting out this desire I've had for a long time that I now know I'm meant to do.
      So that is a big positive I can point to. A new direction for myself and my life, a new sense of purpose- even if it took having my heart broken and my life falling apart. I'm grateful that I finally am committing to that path

    • @jameshayes116
      @jameshayes116 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

      ​@@iconoclastic-fantastichope things ate better a few more months out.

  • @nachobeti67
    @nachobeti67 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    My ex just text me on my phone and facebook account when i thought i was finally healed. The emotions, thoughts, rumination that came straight away was a surprise for me coz he hurt me a lot and i thought i was over. I even started to make stories in my mind and couldn t stop thinking about him. I was so low but then i found this video and the one of the 7 signs of narcissist. My ex had all the signs and straight away i felt relieved, went back on my feet and happy i put a stop to him. Thank you so much for your help. Hanna from France!

  • @neelfamilyfarm4677
    @neelfamilyfarm4677 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I love the back and forth with both of your personalities. Audrey is such a great addition, she always makes me laugh.

  • @kimmercieca4972
    @kimmercieca4972 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Im kind of listening to the podcast but Im mostly watching and admiring the beautiful connection between you two. Absolutely gorgeous 🥰

  • @sihr07
    @sihr07 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +18

    A month since I cut it off with my ex from 4 years ago. So proud of myself for finally doing so, and so disappointed at myself for letting it go on for so long and let it rob me of my peace of mind.

  • @heather3358
    @heather3358 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    I find your tips work with friends too, they can also leave you after years of being a friend.

  • @carmeniagar167
    @carmeniagar167 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +48

    years later i’m so sad 🤦🏻‍♀️😕i’m trying to change the story and let go but something somehow draws me back and i’m so annoyed with myself to the point of hating myself for checking on them

    • @al5068
      @al5068 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

      I’m sorry to say that it doesn’t ever feel right to do so, but you’ll have to discipline yourself to stop looking them up. I used to record a star for everyday I didn’t look them up and soon those stars added up and before I knew it it was second nature to forget them and get on with my day. ☮️

    • @Low-t6g
      @Low-t6g 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@al5068Thank you for the great idea. Mine is only 10 weeks ago, he’d already moved on when we met in person, he’s now got engaged to the other woman. The worse part is the lies I believed

    • @talesfromtheroad9530
      @talesfromtheroad9530 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

      We all do it girl lol don't blame yourself.
      I do love the star idea tho!!
      We're all out here trying to adjust and move forward and it takes time

    • @ItSpooling_
      @ItSpooling_ 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Because that’s Mother Nature. Go for it and give it another try.
      We are human, and won’t be here for long. Or you can follow the advice from all the robots in the comments

    • @silvermine2033
      @silvermine2033 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      You're not alone.

  • @talesfromtheroad9530
    @talesfromtheroad9530 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    OMGSH thank you! Audrey, it soothed my soul and made me exhale all blame when you explained the untangling of neuro pathways and how that's a process and a beautiful sign of our ability to bond. And Matthew, thanks for saying healing is not one and done or a binary...helps me release guilt and annoyance with myself when I have moments of missing him and our past life. What an awesome idea to change the name. I paused the video and changed it to a (maybe ridiculously long-winded) 'You deserve someone who wants you strongly, clearly, warmly, daily, forever. This person is no longer a romantic option.' 😂 My brain knows that, but you're right, my brain also still gets warm fuzzies at the shape of the letters of his name. I WILL integrate, I WILL move on. I've done it before and I can again 💪 But thanks for reminding me to be gentle. I might have slowed my own detachment process bc I saw my ex as friend in our friend group for over a year, regularly. A few months ago he asked to take space and have no contact for at least 6 months. I was grief stricken at first (bc it meant losing some interactions with the group and losing an activity with them I did regularly), but I'm adjusting and finding new ways to see our mutual friends, and realizing he's prob right and this will be good for me too. But darn it my brain goes haywire when someone disappears - it feels like a second rejection and I've re-set the clock a little on healing. I'm struggling bc I love his family too (lived with them) and it's hard to, say, not be invited to their Fourth of July party today. We didn't end angrily, he just didn't love me enough to move towards engagement, and it's a loss I'm working through. But this will be better and I will get there ❤ And as much as it hurts, grieving a life I lived with him, his family, and his friends, it means I'm capable of bonding and can do it again. (And just so no one feels too badly for me lol, I do have my own friend group and am seeing them today. 🎆) Love to all you brave strong people out there in this world trying to find your forever partners, and who need to start over (I'm almost 36) ❤ We will be okay and we will tell a story of our resilience decades hence

    • @karenking5910
      @karenking5910 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I can relate to your story, I’m going through the same thing right now. My ex no longer wants to be friends even though we have been since our break up 4 years ago yet we were together for 18 years…
      It is heartbreaking 💔

    • @alesik07
      @alesik07 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      If you want to learn more about rewiring the neural pathways in the brain within the grieving process (what Audrey was speaking about), listen to the episode of Andrew Huberman here on TH-cam about grief.

  • @RoyalPineapple-dk2vg
    @RoyalPineapple-dk2vg 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    See -- Audrey found Matthew, and Matthew found Audrey, even after the 'Clementine' story, it's possible to find someone who's better for you. Don't look back in the rearview mirror or you can't look forward for good things to come, that's if you're willing to look forward to what else is in your future. If you still think of the other person, it's because you're a quality, thoughtful, loyal person but once the person has gone, let them go. That person didn't love enough to stay, who wants to be stuck with someone who doesn't love us for who we are? .We are all special and unique but also stop 'Idolizing' the Ex, the 'what we had' life, Find the Best Life for you!

  • @susanlodzsun3249
    @susanlodzsun3249 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    I'm having a hard time finding the positive in the pain.
    I'm not sure anything amazing can come out of this for me.
    Those words are comforting, but I don't feel realistic for me at this phase so early in the break up.

    • @amandayorke481
      @amandayorke481 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I think this is for when you are further down the road, that's all. Of course when you have just got out of what turned out to be a horribly painful episode of your life, no way you are going to say "Wow! I've learned so much from that. Isn't that great!"

    • @stephen12holbrook
      @stephen12holbrook 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      @@amandayorke481 Spot on. Right now, Susan, you are in survival mode, so for the next few weeks or months (however long it takes, dont set a timeline expectation for yourself), you just need to focus on allowing yourself to grieve, while also being kind to yourself, taking care of yourself. The growth comes later, but you have to choose it. Im sorry for your pain, I also once said to my friends that I dont know how Im going to get through this, but I can now promise you, it does get easier, and I am grateful for the growth I have chosen to pursue (Not thankful for the pain! But we dont have control of that).

    • @rik4673
      @rik4673 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      ​@stephen12holbrook, I like what you wrote - " Don't set a timeline expectation for yourself ". I am going to do just that , let the pain and hurt come and go and eventually hope that it will finally go away .
      I am trying to get back the kind , lively , funny , positive and adventurous spirit I used to be.

    • @jirinafrankova166
      @jirinafrankova166 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Thats what I feel as well. I lost health because of bad psychosomatics, lack of sleep and clinical deppresion. During breakup I was so overwhelmed by the negative from the other person that I crashed my car and caused a serious accident. I dont see anything good even after years from the breakup.

  • @palinamusicofficial
    @palinamusicofficial 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Im so here for Matthew & Audrey doing this format together!!

  • @aureozakky
    @aureozakky 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Thank you guys, as i am actually going into a separation from a long period relationship and watching you guys is being like therapy and it is helping me look the process on a different perspective...you are contributing so much during this grieving journey of mine. Thank you so much...

  • @OzYil47
    @OzYil47 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    Why would you even keep their phone number? It's done. Delete the number and move on. If you still have their number then you're still hoping to get back together. It doesn't help you move on.

  • @annahickson5173
    @annahickson5173 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    How can I a 54 year old woman be emboldened and hopeful in an instant listening to your conversation and grateful in understanding how the murk of my thoughts can be redifined by rigour and purposeful strategy in minimising catastrophic thinking ? I am grateful for your profound insight and genuine desire to help and inform a generation of people who have been ill advised and blindsided. Your philosophy provides credence and an absolute certainty in creating better outcomes towards peace and happiness. Education on meaningful connection should be a given. Society needs this, it must become our daily mantra. I thank you.

  • @CatalinaFOIA
    @CatalinaFOIA 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +24

    Thank you! Please create more content like this 🙏I have an ex (1st love) of 27 yrs and I still have love for him. We are distant friends. At one point he wanted to meet up with me; yet I couldn't bring myself to see him because he wants much more from me. He broke my heart💔 back in 1997 and he says he has been heartbroken ever since. He says he keeps looking for me in other women and he can't find another me 😢 I live 6 hrs away and have ran into him twice for about 5 minutes. He is now a severe drug addict and that breaks my heart 💔 The first time I saw him I was so shocked that I could barely speak. I was so angry at myself that I didnt give him a hug, so when I saw him 18 months later that is the 1st thing I did. I wish I could be his friend, a real friend 😢 but I know he wants more and I don't want to hurt him. I've had a life partner for18 years and I'm not about to hurt him; he's the one I'm in love with. My life partner is aware of this situation, I don't hide anything from him. He was there when I hugged my ex. My ex looks like a walking skeleton😢 Thank you for this topic.

    • @TeresaJeanna
      @TeresaJeanna 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      How did he break your heart in 1997? What happened?

    • @amandayorke481
      @amandayorke481 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Why on earth would you be angry with yourself for leaving someone who was not faithful either to you or even to themselves? You are with someone who has chosen you and stuck by you. Celebrate it! I still pray for my last partner of 15 years ago, but he is CHOOSING to destroy himself in a horribly self-indulgent way with drugs and alcohol and I have no regrets about leaving. I didn't do any of that to him.

  • @DenizEll
    @DenizEll 28 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Love it! Love Martin Snow - the Tiger too❤ But also, the fact that the pain and “missing them” is at level 9 right now, doesn’t change the fact that you’ve had the joy at level 2 when you were together! We are prone “to forget” how joyless was the relationship before it ended (most of the time, especially when you are the one that breaks up), how much lies and gaslighting there was, how much non-committed or etc etc etc he was… we tend to forget all these parts of the so called relationship when we are in pain. And we shouldn’t! Triggers will be always there, yet as Matt says - if we consciously transform these triggers into a reminder of how much we needed this ”wake up call” for ourselves to return BACK to ourselves and focus on becoming the best version that we can be - we’ll have a realistic story! I’m going through pain now, it’s awful! I’m not here to do a positive pep talk, but I also am aware that whatever happens and gives us pain (e.g. break up), is happening FOR us. Once we are able to sustain that fact in our minds - the journey of new self becoming will be rather joyous. Love to everyone who is strong enough to work on themselves ❤

  • @Vener349
    @Vener349 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Matt's advice for turning the trigger was low-key genius. The lightbulb of excitement and "yes!" came on in my mind. His insights are uncannily spot on. I can see how his going thru tough times has lent him the sharpened tools and wisdom to help many of us still starting out. Thanks a lot dude.

  • @light6274
    @light6274 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    The pain is so raw and constant and it was 18 years of narcissistic abuse. There is nothing that isn’t a trigger about myself or how I interact with other people who are nice to me . Even that hurts ..

  • @AnneT-q7k
    @AnneT-q7k 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Throw your energy into something very positive that will be of a POSITIVE IMPACT/ GOAL yourself.
    To improve things for yourself.
    Years ago I said to myself I'll not let them waste my time with lingering on thoughts of them.
    I started studies on my favorite subjects and threw myself into it.
    Now I have an extra qualifications that opened fantastic new doors & career opportunities for me.
    I remember studying through tears, battling to get my assignments in on time despite all their opposition.
    Now I can rejoice because I've tasted so much success and surpassed all their and my own expectations !
    Build up yourself !
    Even if you just go get a nice new hairstyle for YOURSELF !
    Celebrate your own talents !
    Get CREATIVE.
    SIGNS UP for a course.
    You'll meet new & nicer people to allow in your life.
    Enjoy !

  • @JulesAl-Mighty
    @JulesAl-Mighty 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I used to change the name to Nope, but at this point I’m more likely to simply block and delete contact info/ social media.
    I don’t mind some hard earned growth, but nobody is popping back up to disturb my peace.

  • @puseletsoish
    @puseletsoish 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    At this moment, I personally don't think/believe anything will help me and if things will get better honestly. I'm so tired of everything. Waking up, the first thing I experience is so much pain in my heart and brokenness feeling I can't even explain.

    • @FarkasRenata-lp4tr
      @FarkasRenata-lp4tr 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      same here, sending you virtual hugs.. 🥺

    • @deja3990
      @deja3990 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I want to say that I was in that space the past few months. Crying myself to sleep, waking up with terrible anxiety, just barely making it through the day with my sanity and rinse / repeat. It gets lighter. Try to focus your energy on something positive. I started running & going to the gym. I’m still deeply sad but at least be doing something good for yourself and putting good energy into yourself. I know it’s so bleak and feels helpless but keep the faith.

    • @deja3990
      @deja3990 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@nicholaspetre1 just those silent moments where you’re completely alone with your thoughts can feel very sad and isolating. I hope for things to get better for you!

  • @גידימרום
    @גידימרום 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    אני מיואש. הלב שלי שבור. אני לא מדבר ומבין אנגלית כל כך אבל מהקצת שמצליח בכל זאת להבין מתנחם... זה עוזר ומחזק לדעת שהרבה אנשים מרגישים את אותו כאב שאתה נמצא בו

  • @traceykemple2768
    @traceykemple2768 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Absolutely sabotaged by a clementine. Brutal....

  • @sundancerday2278
    @sundancerday2278 15 วันที่ผ่านมา

    That name change is a game changer 😮 "you deserve better babygirl ❤" it is for me. Now, when I look into my call history, I feel empowered instead of abandoned!😊

  • @noah1502
    @noah1502 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    im also struggling with the idea that i will grow from this pain. i will. but i could have also grown in the relationship, with love and support and care. we both were growing and i can continue to grow. i 100% feel what Audrey said when she said "I could have held on to this person had I not been such a piece of fucking shit". I keep feeling that way. Making a list of all that went wrong on both sides helps. I just wish I could prove to him how much I can and have changed just in the past two days..... dear god please.

  • @LifeVabo
    @LifeVabo 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

    Say to yourself: "It sucks that I ever met somebody like that but thankfully the experience is over." Remove exposure to the person. Focus on other interests and let time fade your feelings and thoughts of them. Remind yourself of who you were before you ever even met them and choose a better path this time around. A quality life experience over a crap one.

    • @al5068
      @al5068 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Great advice ❤

    • @BelleMaChelle
      @BelleMaChelle 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

  • @akshatjain8303
    @akshatjain8303 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    1. Do not tell yourself a hypothetical story of how you can’t get out of your ex
    2. When trigger happens turn it into a positive by connecting with good things happened bcz of that break up
    3. Don’t follow to thought by stoping to go with flow of your mind

  • @yolenda_loves_to_sing
    @yolenda_loves_to_sing 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    I have a question - Is there anyone who did say "no" to their ex who came back, but actually REGRETs for it later in their life, and still wondering the "what if", and is missing them, and secretly want to contact them again, but ego is in the way, and don't know what to do now? Just curious, anyone? Or do I have a special case?? :(

    • @romyxx71
      @romyxx71 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      I had no regrets, but subconsciously I was waiting for him to mature (read: change). He never did, I married someone else, he married someone else, had children, and in 2022 I just broke off all contact. I realised that I was unconsciously waiting and that I was actually holding on to my fantasy of the relationship I wanted with him. Not the real relationship we had or the real him as I had known him. No, I did not want that relationship or him as he was, but I did want MY fantasy relationship and the mature version of him that I was holding on to. And I also realised that he was doing the same. Life is not a fantasy. It is what happens between the time you wake up and the time you go to bed.

    • @unicornsarereal8484
      @unicornsarereal8484 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      I did but after the regrets of saying “no”, I sat with myself and made a list of all my reasons for saying “no”. ( like the disrespect, broken promises, me putting my life on hold etc…) This was an eye opener. Then I made a list of all the things I achieved. They are not necessarily big achievements but taking care of myself, reading on personal development, learning new things like putting boundaries and respecting them, having me time , all of these made me realise that I should have no regrets. And now, I don’t 😊

    • @heyu123
      @heyu123 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      That usually wouldn’t work anyway. Unless the both of you completely changed as people. And there was a reason u said no, maybe because deep down inside you knew this person wasn’t good for u. Sorry 😞

    • @_Diaryofwealth
      @_Diaryofwealth 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Yes it happens dont let ego ruin something beautiful some relationships can be worked through

    • @zacpdx
      @zacpdx 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It can go both ways but the only way for it to work again is to both have grown and want to work out the things that caused the breakup initially…which rarely happens…because of ego, ignorance, narcissism, lack of awareness, to name a few. Anything is possible in this world. How bad do you want it?

  • @Claire-h5t
    @Claire-h5t 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I’d ask the universe to cut the energetic cord between you both and to prevent it from reattaching. Done. No more ex! xx

  • @janieho
    @janieho 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    great coach. he does hundreds of videos on the same topic and every time, new insight that we have to really concentrate and understand

  • @ashtynrose1906
    @ashtynrose1906 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    "..and Audrey Hussey". How cute! Congratulations!

  • @sihr07
    @sihr07 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    We’re so lucky for Matthew sharing this content. And Martin Snow is the coach we all want in our lives 🥹

  • @Askaa88
    @Askaa88 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I have another trigger not related to an ex reaching back. What if you seem to be over an ex in your daily roundabouts but you keep dreaming about the ex almost every week. What is the subconsciousness trying to tell me? That I'm lying to myself for saying that I got over the ex? Do I still want them back in my life in any shape or form? I don't know man, I mean, sure, the memories we had were great but the reality is, I don't want them back. But every week, those dreams keep reminding me how great that ex was because most of the time, those dreams are very sweet. I know some wounds will always leave a scar behind but those dreams are somewhat bothering me. What to do about it?

  • @keamogetsoeipeleng5565
    @keamogetsoeipeleng5565 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    It is a reference point! Wow! Simple yet clear. Thanks for freeing me.

  • @DarylSimpson58
    @DarylSimpson58 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her.

    • @peterwilliams6361
      @peterwilliams6361 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back

    • @DarylSimpson58
      @DarylSimpson58 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

    • @peterwilliams6361
      @peterwilliams6361 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Her name is chamani White, and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

    • @DarylSimpson58
      @DarylSimpson58 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

  • @irmamakrevski5652
    @irmamakrevski5652 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    17:30 reminder to all great things about personal progress made in self developmemt; no elimination of trigger but thought redesign
    29:26 scroll past instead of ruminating

  • @stivstiv2559
    @stivstiv2559 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you. Love the advice - 'Dont follow the thought'. 😊

  • @adelineteo6921
    @adelineteo6921 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I changed his name to “Cad” and then “Scoundrel”. He fancied himself a Mr Darcy, I consider him a Mr Wickham, so this was apt.

  • @C0smicbeauty1990
    @C0smicbeauty1990 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    The episode I didn’t know I needed. I am going into no contact with someone I had an emotional/sexual connection with and I see him for sure weekly. This person has moved on and I have not. I got off social media in general and now I decided to not contact this person anymore unless absolutely necessary due to circumstances. I never thought about making this person a catalyst for a beautiful metamorphosis instead of a painful trigger. Even though this has been painful, a lot
    Of good has come from this pain.

  • @temialonge1689
    @temialonge1689 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    Broke up with my ex of 20years last March..he got a child with another woman he met less than a year ago!! I am hurt but it gets better. I sent him packing. A few days ago he knocked on my door and I looked at him with no emotions through the glass....I didn't feel any emotions...my daughter started crying but it is what it is...I REALLY DONT KNOW WHAT HE WANTED!!!! I wish I could read his mind...the super NARC!!

    • @_Diaryofwealth
      @_Diaryofwealth 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      So what do you want now u broke up

  • @leannewilliams1660
    @leannewilliams1660 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You two made me laugh, especially with the clamintime story but it was really helpful and I have now changed his name to "I deserve better"

  • @catboxcleaner3532
    @catboxcleaner3532 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    But, Matthew, some of us are unable to develop and grow and build success into our lives. Some of us continue to struggle, despite therapy, and wish we could return to the loving state we shared with this person, who still reaches out from time to time, sprinkling hope with shallow promises, but no real intention or follow-up. It has happened three times after the original break-up; the third time, though, I could clearly see he is using me, and thought, how is this ok? To borrow a phrase from you, Matthew, the behavior “is not interesting to me”, and dims my desire to pine for reconciliation when he clearly doesn’t wish it, because what he says doesn’t match his actions. I’m trying (again) to go back to school to better my life, but struggling to find my path, and there remains the faintest glimmer in one of his statements: that if we are both single in ten years, we could be together. But, what about all the time in between? What about all the loving we’ll miss? And, do I really want to be someone’s absolute last choice? No.

    • @akrico1
      @akrico1 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      So interesting how close this is to my story. Ex wife can’t seem to let go of me even 2 yrs later. And I’m not as strong as I should be.
      We get micro-dosed by them “sprinkling hope” you called it.
      “Who knows where we’ll be in a few years” she even said and “never say never”
      Ugh…..
      I know I need to move on, move forward.
      I’m meeting some quality women in public. Most recently a nurse who seems lovely. How will you know you’re ready unless you test the water? Jay Shetty reference there. And to Matthew’s point in other video. We don’t have to be completely healed, just healed enough. I’m not waiting around for someone who doesn’t seem to want me any longer.

    • @catboxcleaner3532
      @catboxcleaner3532 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ⁠​⁠@@akrico1Thank you for sharing your experience. I would like to train my brain for peace and purpose. I wish you peace and joy on your journey. Take care.

  • @mika.mirjana
    @mika.mirjana 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Hahahahahaha bloody little clementine 😂 I remember when my cat made a call on Instagram profile of a person that used to be a friend of mine but we lost connection, and she answered! That was so awkward, insane, and embarrassing at the same time. I actually tried to explain that my cat called her and it was ridiculous when I heard myself what I said!! 😅

  • @cotacabezas3729
    @cotacabezas3729 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Seen the most beautiful full moon and them with somebody else breaks you to the point of maybe never recovering after a significant, deep, years of family life and sacrifice. And it's ok to never recover. It's fine. Something good comes out anyways.

  • @ShishiraNair
    @ShishiraNair 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Excellent video. My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love him so much I can’t stop thinking about him, I’ve tried my very best to get him back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of him, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss him and just can’t stop thinking about him

    • @LoveNufable
      @LoveNufable 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      its difficult to let go of someone you love, I was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but I couldn't just let him go I did all I could to get him back, I had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring him back

    • @ShishiraNair
      @ShishiraNair 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do I reach one.?

    • @LoveNufable
      @LoveNufable 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      His name is Owen Abiola, and he is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex...

    • @ShishiraNair
      @ShishiraNair 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Thank you for this valuable information, I just looked him up online. impressive.

  • @susangreen4427
    @susangreen4427 3 วันที่ผ่านมา

    My relationship turned out to be very abusive
    He checked my phone communication with exes even before I met him
    He grilled about my past in great details for the 10 months I dated him
    He also told me things of his exes to hurt me on purpose without me asking
    He broke up with me
    It is a blessing
    I am happy he is gone

  • @sarah_9501
    @sarah_9501 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    You need to make a choice. You either continue to let yourself be hurt by this person constantly or you find someone else.

    • @crucifire9224
      @crucifire9224 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Find yourself

  • @haileynichelle8343
    @haileynichelle8343 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Love the clementine story!

  • @pixxie__
    @pixxie__ 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I understand where Matthew is coming from with the whole “this was a catalyst for your growth”, but what if it’s been years later and you haven’t had growth from it, what if you’re still suffering and in pain from it and you’re in the same place emotionally and mentally you were when they broke up with you?

    • @cecilang9721
      @cecilang9721 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      You don’t “have” growth. You make goals and you “make” growth for yourself. Sign up for classes, apply for a new job, join a gym, start new hobbies. You seem very passive, waiting for things to happen to you. Good things never just happen. You have to go create the life you want. And hopefully in the way there you find a companion walking the same path. Staying stagnant will not magically bring growth.

  • @tlove22
    @tlove22 10 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I love the dynamic between these too! 🥰

  • @ZERO-609
    @ZERO-609 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    We were together for 2 and half years last month she married someone else while im studying abroad in Australia, im only 21 and she is 19 so I just cant marry her now and yes im studying . I am really depressed and here I live alone so theres no one to support me,

  • @mirnatutnjevic6714
    @mirnatutnjevic6714 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Love listening to both of you amazing lovely people. Audrey is fantastic. Thank you both for everything you do. You truly make a difference. Lots of love from Sweden❤

  • @vp205.
    @vp205. 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Just see no point in not blocking a ex. We shouldnt allow the triggers at all. They are a ex for a reason. Only exception to not blocking is if you share children.

    • @lisaanderson1695
      @lisaanderson1695 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      I have mine blocked right now.

  • @milaalt1141
    @milaalt1141 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    What I did in my situationship....it wasn't even a relationship, is think about what is it about this person that I loved soo much.
    I wrote down characteristics like being confifent to go for what they want or funny.
    Then I started asking myself if anu of those characteristics I was not giving to myself.
    I apparanytly was not letting myself live a life that was phenominal for my inner child .
    Also, it is okay to let yourself feel out all the ways you loved them and then all the pain of thr relationship you never got. Suppressing emotion stops you from truelly healing.
    Pick something you always wanted to do that you can make steps to and do it to start your new life.

  • @ShopgirlNY182
    @ShopgirlNY182 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I just tried to change their name in my phone to “you deserve better” and accidentally hit their number and it started to call them. 😳 Now I can’t say sorry I didn’t mean to call you I was just changing your name in my phone 😂. He caused me so much pain but now I’m finally feeling better because it’s true what Matthew says, you can turn a negative experience into a positive. I almost want to thank him for the breakup because I wouldn’t have learned so much about myself and my attachment wounds if this heartbreak and pain didn’t happen to me.

    • @kk-xi8li
      @kk-xi8li 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Lmao. I feel your pain. I was reading my last conversation with him and accidentally liked my last message to him (which he never responded to and ghosted me 😢). I was mortified 😅

    • @ShopgirlNY182
      @ShopgirlNY182 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@kk-xi8li that sounds like something I would do! Well he never reached out to see if I called him so that’s good. I think we left on friendly terms so it’s not that big of a deal but it’s still silly of me. I can’t believe I did that but it’s ok 😂

  • @NederlandseGeschiedenis
    @NederlandseGeschiedenis 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    For me it has now been almost 40 years and I still have a problem with it the pain and sadness keep coming back why does this keep haunting me is it possible that I still don't know what the reason is that she left me? my doctor talks about heartbreak but it may be that after 40 years I still have feelings for her 40 years have passed and I haven't even seen it it ended in 1985 and in 2012 I woke up since then I left from an introvert to an extrovert and the pain and sadness just won't let me go, it just keeps haunting me

    • @cleob9956
      @cleob9956 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I think it’s called complicated grief. I believe I read that some of us are more prone to it than others. I’m sorry for your pain.

    • @NederlandseGeschiedenis
      @NederlandseGeschiedenis 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@cleob9956 I tried to contact her and her daughter via Facebook, but neither of them responded, it seemed as if I had been written out of their history.

  • @RVCHAT
    @RVCHAT 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    She is so insightful. Who is she?

    • @anonoona
      @anonoona 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      His wife 🥰

  • @SelinaDavids
    @SelinaDavids 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you both i love watching listen and take note of your lovely amazing conversations that changes so many lives out there. 🌹🤗❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @susanparkes5096
    @susanparkes5096 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    What if you can't see any growth/good past, present or future.to come from the situation? What is 'growth' anyway? What if nothing comes into your life to take that place, nothing 'amazing' happens?

    • @egbertgroot2737
      @egbertgroot2737 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Exactly ......it is hardly like for me as well that i will ever get better than i experienced! All i can hope is i can forget how wonderful it was

  • @melinazarate2798
    @melinazarate2798 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    SUCH strong words from Martin! Very good video, thank you very much! ❤

  • @SweeetSpice
    @SweeetSpice 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    It’s been almost a year and I have thought about him at least once every day.

  • @bolt-dbtfg
    @bolt-dbtfg 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    is your subsequent behaviour to your advantage or disadvantage upon the "trigger" is what matters.
    Not how you feel about it.

  • @hawaiiansmith15
    @hawaiiansmith15 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I am reading the comments below I don’t get how people can get over someone been together for 10 years my bf and I have been together after he asked me to marry him on and off and then ghosts me and then idk why he ups and down like that wtf I don’t understand after everything we been through

  • @slyfly4829
    @slyfly4829 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

    It's not just her I miss, I miss our family

  • @imarinacz
    @imarinacz 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    going to buy a clementine just to verify if its segment is actually going to “like” a post by dropping it on my phones screen🏃🏼‍♀️💕

  • @CNProductionsMusic
    @CNProductionsMusic 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    See, my situation was a little different. We had been dating for 3 months, and I told her I needed to work on myself. (I genuinely did, and still am.) I then realized, that she never really cared about me after all. Which really really sucks because I truly “loved” her. Whenever I told her I was leaving, I starting bawling because I didn’t want to. But, I was in such a bad mental place and it was honestly do or die. That’s how bad it got. So, now it just feels like I lost apart of me and she didn’t even care.

  • @Borengar629
    @Borengar629 หลายเดือนก่อน

    5:00 Take that Occam‘s razor 😂

  • @jasonchua8758
    @jasonchua8758 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    My ex broke up a month earlier with me and 3 day ago
    She ask me to move on and she will move on as well.
    but later that day it self , she post our date night picture on her Facebook and IG as he profile .
    Not sure what is she trying to get at.
    I’m still griefing,
    Feels like adding more fire to my pain

  • @TakticalTekniq
    @TakticalTekniq 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    The wisdom that I’ve gotten from Matt and Heidi Priebe is that getting over someone is not an action that affects a binary state. You’re not “over” someone or “not over” them. Getting over someone is a spectrum that happens slowly over time. You may never FULLY “get over” someone you truly and deeply loved, but you’re healing when you can think about them and even miss them without it shattering your world and preventing you from being present in your real life with the people who love you now. Getting there just takes time and forgiving ourselves. :)

  • @briangong007
    @briangong007 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Great subject and great timing for me, as I am navigating through the ending of a relationship.

  • @shadwabarghash8734
    @shadwabarghash8734 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    think of "i did/do like him, but ...", makes it more acceptable feeling & easier to pass the thought off

  • @Ingrafre
    @Ingrafre 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    Best story ever (clementine), Audrey!

  • @JenLeighC
    @JenLeighC 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    That was exactly what I needed to hear right now !

  • @ShenalVimukthi-m3c
    @ShenalVimukthi-m3c 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Don't worry you got this ❤

    • @Goddess4Life88
      @Goddess4Life88 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      What was her name

    • @ShenalVimukthi-m3c
      @ShenalVimukthi-m3c 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@Goddess4Life88 can't mention here 🤓

  • @soudehayanifard9576
    @soudehayanifard9576 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    WHY DON'T WE JUST BLOCK THEM ALL OVER AND NOT WORRY ABOUT THEM POPPING UP ON OUR PHONE?

  • @biljam972
    @biljam972 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    As asocial person I have a lot of problems to find a partner. I might even be on spectrum, not sure. So when I finally found the person I could talk to for hours and hours and have great conversations and connection which is super rare for me, I couldn't let go. He wasn't ready for relationship, never will be, but I just kept on pursuing. Finally, after almomst 15 years of my lost youth and possibilities in life, he literally ghosted me and I still suffer. I do try with other people but it's hard when I see that he can be close to others but not to me. I am living the best life I can alone, I take care of stray cats, I have hobbies, job, I date sometimes, but there are times when something reminds me of him and it's still not easy.

    • @perlovgren919
      @perlovgren919 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Taking care of stray cats is awesome, you sound like a great person, not unlikely you will find someone else like that. good luck!

    • @biljam972
      @biljam972 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@perlovgren919 i love my kitties! I am just sad I don't have enough money to help them more than I can. I don't meet men feeding kitties butI don't care. If it happens happens. If not it's not that bad being single.

  • @SuperBari2009
    @SuperBari2009 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Love this. I use IGNORE for the contact change.

  • @denisa239
    @denisa239 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    2 years later and I still have not moved on. It feels awful that he moved on so quickly and got into a relationship right after he dumped me. I’m so heartbroken!

    • @SR-jg3bp
      @SR-jg3bp 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      same , my ex got married like 3 months post breakup

    • @carmenkamberos1156
      @carmenkamberos1156 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      denisa 239, if he’s a narcissist, they need to look for the next victim for supply of whatever they feed on. Narcissistic people never love anybody, they just mirror your love for them and reflect it back to you. Don’t look back and move on. The right person will come your way when you’re not searching.

  • @silentvoice4970
    @silentvoice4970 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    You two need someone to push back on some concepts such as 'bad things always have silver linings' and are for the lesson they provide. Domestic Violence is NOT for the good of tge one being beat. Car accidents that leave a person paralysed are not 'good learning curves'. A child dying from cancer didn't teach mum n dad how to love.
    When nasty things happen in our lives, we want to find a reason. We want to discover some silver lining. This is a very human urge. The point is to settle the psche and find acceptance that allows us to move into a beautiful experience.

  • @bodhi9464
    @bodhi9464 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    just rewatched the Wim Hof adventure you had with the lads ~ someone that “sounds intelligent” ~
    This has come up in my feed now.
    🇦🇺☀️🏄‍♂️💦🙏🏼🧘‍♂️🎶🥶🌟

  • @AlejandroRodriguez-zk9ej
    @AlejandroRodriguez-zk9ej 13 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Im 37 years old and this is the first time I go through this heartbreak. It hurts so much to finally see my ex with someone else. We broke up about 10 years ago but neither of us hooked up with anyone else in that time. However, recently my ex has started seeing someone and it looks like their connecting. My Ex was my first love, my first everything. My gosh, I've never experienced this kind of pain, it hurts so much. It feels like a loved one died and I'm mourning them. Its all I think about everyday now and it absorbs all my energy. I'm crying every day. I want my ex to be happy, I wish them the best. does anyone know of any resources or chat rooms for this? Thanks for reading my comment.

    • @Danny-k1k
      @Danny-k1k 13 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I understand and sympathize Alejandro 2:26

    • @Danny-k1k
      @Danny-k1k 13 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Right after Thanksgiving My girlfriend/ex asked me to meet her for lunch (not unusual) and showed me an engagement ring someone else gave her. I went to lunch thinking I was going to meet my girlfriend. I left being an ex. Totally blindsided. Nice kickoff to my holiday season

  • @lorrainestyles1287
    @lorrainestyles1287 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Mine would be narcissistic, but I have to still work for him so I’ll have to leave his name as is

    • @tanyaalota
      @tanyaalota 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I have to work with mine. Not looking forward to that.

  • @annaalm18
    @annaalm18 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I have experienced massive transformation after my last breakup and I know that this would not have happend without the pain and suffering I had experienced in the relationship. So the next question is how gratefuI should feel towards my (avoidant) ex? I am grateful of the experience but it seems inadequate to me feeling grateful towards him having treated me badly. Where is the line between the person and the experience? This is truly a question that I am asking myself.

  • @dorothykrzyzak1180
    @dorothykrzyzak1180 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    You guys are Brilliant Thank you 😊

  • @artofwinemaking
    @artofwinemaking 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    I changed it’s name to Gaslighter

    • @pegbuckner5074
      @pegbuckner5074 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Mine is Breadcrumbs

    • @rkk2606
      @rkk2606 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      “(His initials) the Monkeybrancher”

  • @HaloHuntress
    @HaloHuntress 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Ok, even if he's with someone else, I would like to remind myself why he's awful for me.
    Addict, alcoholic, shuts down, gaslights, broke, bad driver, financially irresponsible, cringey, unattractive, stinks, rotting teeth, his family and mine tell me I deserve better. Ok. It helps to write and say it out loud.

  • @shaunp5033
    @shaunp5033 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Im really struggling, Mathew. She left me after 3 years, but her last comment holding my hand looking me in the eye, was that she didn't want to be with anyone else, but that I needed to find myself.
    I was getting too dependent, which I understand now
    Its been 5 weeks, no contact, wtd?