As a woman who is on a journey of freedom from porn. I’ve noticed that since taking the journey seriously over 3 months ago I’ve come to see how 8 years of being addicted has blinded me to the beauty of the body and made me deaf to the prophetic message that the body speaks. The last three months have been a cleansing of my eyes, a daily washing out of all the crud with the holy waters of Theology of the Body so that I can see the beauty of the male body and gaze upon it in a holy way. Sometimes it’s easier than other times and I have a long way to go to win the war but each day that I head into the lustful battle and learn to see my brothers in Christ righty is a win. You can break free from lust. As said is Luke 1:37 “For nothing will be Impossible with God” Thank you Christopher for all that you do. God Bless You!!!
@croatiangambler8059 I’m 23 too, soon to be 24 in a couple weeks. I know how hard it is. I was free for a year at one point and relapsed. Don’t white knuckle this journey. Stay strong brother. Small battle victories ultimately wins the war.
Been 6 months for me, i love hearing women share their testimony on this because both sexes struggle and men are not creeps for addiction, nor are women whores for the same addiction, rather we are just looking for christ in the wrong places
"The God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give unto you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of him: the eyes of your understanding being enlightened..." Ephesians 1:17-18
Beautiful reflection! This book published by the Theology of the Body Institute goes deep into what you shared: shop.corproject.com/products/god-is-beauty-a-retreat-on-the-gospel-art
As a christain artist myself. Even I'm pondering on such. What is the difference between nude art and porn? Is drawing boobs really a sin? And if someone masturbates to that nude art, is that artist going to hell, even if the art was never meant for porn purposes?
I'm not even a formally converted Christian or Catholic but I thought all of this was very well said. Sins are missed aims towards real goods. Of course there's a good way to look at a body and even desire its intrinsic goodness.
Trying so hard to break my own sinful habit of over 3 decades. I’ve been a psychotherapist for almost 2 decades, and actually have specialities in addiction. Only this past year did I come back to the Catholic Church (and ON FIRE for Christ!) and still . . . my lustful ways persist. Please pray for me.
What if you're a woman "noticing" how you're husband is "appreciating the beauty" of another woman's body? Especially if you are incapable of "matching up". Or, what if you are a man who is "noticing" your wife "appreciating" another man's body? And, you can't "match up" either. I have seen so many married couples who have far less than beautiful bodies and who are incredibly devoted to keeping their eyes to themselves. It's absolutely impressive and beautiful! There's more to this Chris... And I have seen both genders "crazy in love" with their imperfect bodied partners. We love the soul of the one we truly love. I would never want to take a chance on hurting the one I love by causing them to feel lesser than... I refuse to find a back door way of taming my hormones. Go deeper...not just in the awesome thoughts you set forth, but in the value of the soul of the person you call yours. Utilize the Holy Spirit by asking Him to help your weakness and strengthen your good points. Get close to Him in every area of your life. Few do. Know why you are worshipping your Creator and love Him in return. I'm using the word "you" in a rhetorical way. You yourself have given me no reason to disrespect you.
Go workout more. Being physically strong is a very good thing. That applies to woman too. You think you got her body like that just from sitting in front of the couch? God Bless
A christian shouldn't do something that upsets their spouse unnecessarily. Even if it's something permissible. And in case one of the spouses even does something wrong, as to look with lust, the one who is on path to holiness is to not let him or herself have his or her interior peace disturbed, but rather pray for their spouse, and use it as a chance to purify themselves from vanity and ego. We are to always turn into good the bad that others do towards us, and to be careful not to provoke others. Now, supposing we have a couple of saints. They'll both trust one another, will both be able to see true beauty with no lust, will both be able to see someone who looks better than themselves without feeling envy or without even comparing, for they'll have no inordinate desire for pleasure. So they would look at human beauty as someone who looks at the sea or the sky. The same way as little children would do.
As an artist. I can tell you this is true. One can look upon the human body, recognize it for the beautiful image it is and language it speaks and the actual person there, while not lusting. When you can love the other and look to the other and truly see the other, it is truly possible to recognize where physical attraction comes from and then master it by appreciating why there is attraction and then place it in proper order. Lust is a disordered understanding of the human body and sexuality.
"Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?" Our bodies a holy temples made in the image of God. Lets not desecrate the temple self and others but to appreciate its beauty in function in a way that glorifies God
Thank you for seeking to help people understand the truth about the body. I am currently on a journey away from a life of promiscuity and toward a life of freedom in Christ's grace, and your work has impacted me greatly. I agree with everything that you had to say in this video. I guess one thing that I wrestle with in my mind, though, is if a woman is dressed inappropriately, shouldn't I look away. Like if a woman is dressed modestly it is not difficult for me to appreciate her beauty without feeling the temptation to lust. It is when a woman is dressed immodestly that I feel the greatest urge to look away.
Praise God for your witness, brother! Christopher and his wife Wendy address more specific questions and give more detailed advice in their weekly podcast. Feel free to submit your question here: askchristopherwest.com/ask .
I fell hard this past week; thank you so much for helping me reorient myself. I’m currently two chapters into Eating the Sunrise and it’s fantastic!! God bless you guys!
My biggest issue with this right now is meditative prayer. I can't stop from letting sexual things sneak into my head. I'm praying that our Lord heals me unless this be a cross I must carry, outside of my head it's easy to respect people even if they do not respect themselves but in my heart I'm still suffering the porn addiction I had from 13 to 28. Its my imagination thats at issue.
Ask the Lord to introduce you to our Blessed Mother, His mother....She has a special role on struggles with purity❤ I can assure you, I'm Not the only one in the path of freedom, growth, & Joy . Lack of bonding with our parents plays a big part. You Will regain innocence ❤ In God's time🙏. Don't forget to receive the Eucharist, in a state of grace.
@@botijahon8869 thank you, I have been praying 3 rosaries, morning, before noon and afternoon and I have seen a difference in general and in my thoughts. In God's time... Exactly. Thank you and God bless you and keep you
Certain people might have a diminished ability to “gaze upon” physical beauty without falling into lust. This doesn’t mean that physical beauty is inherently bad, but that for some reason or another certain people have to be careful or even stay away completely from resting their eyes on the physical form of someone they find sexually attractive. Like with the consumption of alcohol, some people have to be strict with themselves, whereas others don’t seem to have a problem with moderation.
Please keep me in your prayers Brothers and Sisters in Christ, I've struggled for 9 years and I'm tired of lust. I ask God to help me, but it feels like God is ignoring me because of my disobedience, How do I look at women the correct way? I can't see a woman, stop and pray saying "Thank you God for the beauty of that woman!" That woman would see me pray and question me. I have no courage, so I can't begin dating, I feel years away from having friends. What is the step by step process of looking at woman correctly?
God ALWAYS helps the ones who repent. But you probably experience the consequences of your past sins. They have put in you bad habits, which you must replace with virtue. A prayer can be saying a short sentence in your head, like "Thank you Lord for making her beautiful, help me to respect her dignity", and then continue your walk, that's enough.
Fighting and avoiding lust of the eyes is a practice that has a strong link to porn, whether or not you are in a happy marriage and your prayer life. I understand you are in a catch 22. My suggestion is to start with prayer, develop a routine everyday. I don't know if your Catholic or not but please don't let that get in the way of the suggestion below (especially when you read the text of the prayers suggested). Fr. Chad Ripperger has published a prayer book called Deliverance Prayers (For the Laity). There's a number of prayed in there that have helped me. I would suggest for you, the healing prayer on page 83 or 85. There's a real good one on page 33 to help to be freed from evil habits. If you want, I can give you the text of the prayers here, let me know. Prayer to be freed from evil habits - Give me, I beseech thee, O Holy Spirit, giver of all good gifts, that powerful grace which converts the stony hearts of mortals into burning furnaces of love. By Thy grace, free my captive soul from the thraldom of every evil habit and concupiscence, to restore to it the holy liberty of the children of God. Give me to taste how sweet it is to serve the Lord and crucify the flesh with its vices and concupiscences. Enlarge my heart that I may ever cheerfully run the way of Thy Commandments until I reach the goal of my aspirations, the joys and bliss of Thy habitation in heaven. Amen. Starting with a consistent prayer life helps you build the habits to then avoid porn. Which then helps you control your gaze. Which then should be helping you interact with women. God bless you brother.
Repent, fast, and avoid "the occasions of sins" If your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out. Do not frequent places where women are immodest etc. In time, your brain will rewire itself, and you wouldn't even to take drastic measures. Find someone and get married.
I disagree with those who say you can’t appreciate beauty without lust. But around 08:05 you said “potent papal proclamation.” Just want to clarify you aren’t saying that theology of the body is magisterial since it’s a private work of theology by Karol Wojtyla, not a document under the papal authority of John Paul II
The fact that a doctor or another person can do the profession at hand with relative authenticity and integrity says enough by itself. Bottom line: If you have a purpose behind the person you are when you look out at someone or something in the world, maintaining your integral connection to the purpose within you will ultimately dictate how you look at the person or thing you see in the world. Hence, you can totally look at a very attractive person and acknowledge that they are attractive without being distracted by the physical beauty because your purpose and focuses are distinctly targeted toward other things. Reconsider how the doctor who needs to save an attractive person better not be thinking how hot the person is while giving into the flesh. Instead, the doctor is thinking only of what it takes to keep a human body alive and how that relates to repairing the anatomy of the person/ organism at hand, COMPLETELY DISREGARDING any possible esthetic considerations. A doctor does that all day. it's just an example, but I think it conveyd the message pretty well. GOD Have Mercy and Bless us all on this difficult journey; in The Mighty, Magnificent, and RIGHTEOUS Names of Jesus and The Holy Spirit; amen ✝️🙏🏾
Hi Christopher, thank you for your videos. I'm a Catholic convert and this Easter will be my two year mark. I was thoroughly addicted to porn and still struggle on that front. However, your apostolate has been a great blessing to me. God bless you. Saint Pope John Paul II pray for us!
I am 20 years. I have fought against bad passions, lust, selfishness, pornography. I believe in the goodness, the beauty, the dignity of the human body. I always ask Saint Joseph Most Chaste for his intercession. Sometimes for me seeing the beauty of the body has meant seeing something ordinary that becomes extraordinary when it loves, a body that loves and that serves is extraordinary.
1) Lust is as bad posture and technique in sports. For example, in baseball it's impossible to make contact with a ball coming at you at 90 mph. However, if one develops the habit of a good swing and trains the mind and meory to not only not fear the ball but to address it with the bat, then one can make contact. 2) As the ex-lustful man that I pretend to be, I need to keep praying the Rosary so that my soul (expressed in my body) incarnates the inspiration to develop the virtue of celebrate beauty expressed in the body of someone else. 3) One can see that in the always perfect holy virgin Maria of Guadalupe the fact that a 500-year impression on Juan Diego's tilma is an impossible hallmark even with today's knowledge, in as much is for us modern minds to possibility of thinking beyond lust. 4) By virtue of the glory of God, this translates that my lustful traits are nothing compared to the redemption power of Christ in my soul. There is no enough sin that matches God's covenant.
Thank you for this video,and in particular, addressing that person’s comment from the other video. I read that very same comment and was sorry I that I’ve heard the same sentiment expressed by people I know in my life. Now I have something to share with them that isn’t condescending, condemning, or even threatening. This was so important for me to watch and really listen to. As a (born into it) Catholic who is trying to really understand and connect with it (and one who had a “Catholic” father who was an extremely poor example of one) I very much needed this. Thank you again and again. Thank you for this channel 🙏🏼🙏🏼
Hey I watched you on pints with Aquinas and was very impressed by your thoughts on sex, not Roman Catholic, but I have a new found respect for it in this regard, great work, you have a gift 🎁
Lust = Obsession Just don't obsess over someone by willfully fantasizing about doing sexual acts with them and you'll be fine. It's okay to eat something that tastes good, it's a sin to become gluttonous with it. This is the same principle. It's okay to admire beauty (eat a cupcake), but it's not okay to go full out and fantasize about everything you want to do with that beauty (eating the whole dozen of cupcakes).
I have searched for freedom,in and through many ways as a child because of family occult agreements,at 10 years old I was not allowed to go near our neighbor's daughters.my mind and body was permeated with Lust.i grew up in self hatred seeking vengeance on every woman I met through sexual control. Lust and perversion were my companions of the dark room.i went for much DELIVERENCE,only to fall back in many ways.the journey is slow but Christs long suffering with me,has opened a door of hope,this my 83 year,I want to.thank Almighty God for the fullness of light to enter using you as his channel,to all those who hear this teaching of this ANOINTED man,dont close the door on your freedom,because of the Masonic curse of the phallic symbol agreements of our forefathers,May Christ shed blood break all agreements and set us free.
Deepest suspicion is deepest cynicism. Because I lust, therefore everyone does. Because I haven't opened my heart to God therefore there is no God. I could speak of my own personal experience but such 3rd. party talk from other people never healed my own cynicism. Pure, unadulterated lust is a pure unadulterated chain that binds our freedom and refuses to let us see any other possibility, and because I can't see it; it can't possibly exist.
Thankyou brother 🙏 for another amazing message, soooo beautiful and true! God’s beauty is in all creation can be Loved and appreciated in a pure, holy way that brings greater union with God!
I'm only a few minutes in, and I like where this is going so far. That being said, I want to say this right away, because I suspect it won't be addressed based on what I've heard so far. Lust isn't the only thing at stake. Modesty comes to mind as well, and part of that is custody of the eyes. So, you could say that it's possible to look at the beauty of another person without lusting after them, but should you be looking in the first place?
@breadandcircuses8127I don't have all of the answers, but I'll give you my personal story. I apologize now that this is long. I struggled with pornography since my youth. I abstained and kept myself for my wife, as did she, but I was a slave to my desires. With porn, I fought it hard. I used all of the tools and techniques to fight it, but ultimately, I always fell. Sometimes it took months, other times week, other times only days. God has been working on me for a while, but about 5 years ago, I started doing a lot of biblical study and started teaching kids. One day, I was talking with a friend of mine and the topic of a recently fallen Christian came up. My friend spoke a truth to me. He said "we don't not look at porn because it's good for us. We don't look at it BECAUSE we love God more than we love it". I believe it was the holy spirit speaking. In that moment I recognized it as truth and it permanently changed me. Without any struggle, my 20-year struggle with porn died. Here is what I believe to be true. In the moment of temptation, there is no human logic that can counter the flesh. In the moment, the temptation is what is good for the flesh, which is why our tools and logic fail. In the moment, however, I can choose to give us what is good me (in the flesh) because I love something more. That something more is God. It is my love for Him that prevents me from looking at porn. God becomes my strength. I no longer rely on my own. My chains were broken. Fast forward a bit. While I hadn't looked at pornography or struggled with pornography for a year and a half or so, I still struggled with lust and sexual impurity. I found myself being drawn to things that were attractive. It came to a head when we went to two water parks as a family. My eyes betrayed me. There's a lot of beauty to admire and I found myself with no self-control. During the second water park trip, I asked God to help me with it. One of the best tools that has helped me is doing prayer walks (i.e. 3 miles of walking around my neighborhood after kids go to sleep, no electronics, no head covering). During that time, it is prayer (out loud, but softly), walking, and meditation. It takes about an hour and I try to do them 2-3 times per week. It is my time with God and it is the time that I learn from the Father. I highly highly recommend them. Anyway, during one of my prayer walks I asked God again to help me with my eyes and God put on my heart that I needed to abstain from masturbation. I told God that I would give it up for a year. This is abnormally hard given that we aren't allowed to have sex during pregnancies and we have gone through 8 (only 3 have survived). It's a long time to go without sex. But anyway, I committed to God to do it. It was hard, but I was able to do it. Sex with my wife during this time wasn't better, but our relationship was changing. After about a month of my fasting, I was on a prayer walk. I was talking to God about it and He asked how it has been. I kind of gave Him a status report telling him that it had been hard, but good. My relationship with my wife felt good. It felt as if we were closer than we had been before. At a later time, my wife told me that the way I look at her is different. After telling God that is had been going well, He asked me a question that I never saw coming. He asked me "what about doing it for life?". I was a bit taken back as this is an area of my life that I've never even imagined giving up. It took me 0.75 miles and a few requests, but I agreed. I told him that I would do it. For the next two weeks, I literally grieved. Part of me was dying. I laid in bed grieving and my wife didn't understand. I didn't even ask her about it. Part of me died. That part of me no longer existed in myself. My sexuality could no longer come from myself. The only place that would exist was in my wife. I gave it to her and I told her about it and she said that she would take the responsibility for it, she was happy to. Part of what had to die was my unfulfilled and insatiable desires, in general, and for from my wife. No matter what she gave me before, I always wanted more. In pornography and in masturbation, I could feed it. But now, I could not. What I later realized was that I had never truly been dependent upon my wife for anything. I didn't need her. I had ways to get what I needed from elsewhere. But now, I didn't. I had to become vulnerable and dependent on her for part of who I am. I was no longer whole, for part of me was missing. The only way for me to be whole was with her. My insatiable sexual desires died. My desires for my wife replaced it. While the sex wasn't better at the beginning, it turned into the best sex of my life, every time I am with her, I am satisfied and fulfilled. I am fully hers and all of my sexuality resides in her. For the first time of my life, I am sexually pure. It's coming up on two years now that I made my covenant with God. All I can say is that the worst thing for me personally, is the absolute best thing for us. When I see something attractive (person, image, video) or inappropriate (revealing clothing), I don't experience desire for them. My sexuality doesn't come from them and can't be satisfied from them. It comes from and is satisfied by my wife. The intimacy that I experience with her just cannot be replaced by someone else. My automatic lusting desires that would normally occur in day to day situations is no longer there. I hope that helps. If you have questions, let me know. I know that was long.
@breadandcircuses8127 Part 1) I don't have all of the answers, but I'll give you my personal story. I apologize now that this is long. I struggled with Cornography since my youth. I abstained and kept myself for my wife, as did she, but I was a slave to my desires. With corn, I fought it hard. I used all of the tools and techniques to fight it, but ultimately, I always fell. Sometimes it took months, other times week, other times only days. God has been working on me for a while, but about 5 years ago, I started doing a lot of biblical study and started teaching kids. One day, I was talking with a friend of mine and the topic of a recently fallen Christian came up. My friend spoke a truth to me. He said "we don't not look at corn because it's good for us. We don't look at it BECAUSE we love God more than we love it". I believe it was the holy spirit speaking. In that moment I recognized it as truth and it permanently changed me. Without any struggle, my 20-year struggle with corn died. Here is what I believe to be true. In the moment of temptation, there is no human logic that can counter the flesh. In the moment, the temptation is what is good for the flesh, which is why our tools and logic fail. In the moment, however, I can choose to give us what is good me (in the flesh) because I love something more. That something more is God. It is my love for Him that prevents me from looking at corn. God becomes my strength. I no longer rely on my own. My chains were broken. Fast forward a bit. While I hadn't looked at cornography or struggled with cornography for a year and a half or so, I still struggled with lust and sexual impurity. I found myself being drawn to things that were attractive. It came to a head when we went to two water parks as a family. My eyes betrayed me. There's a lot of beauty to admire and I found myself with no self-control. During the second water park trip, I asked God to help me with it.
@breadandcircuses8127 Part 2) One of the best tools that has helped me is doing prayer walks (i.e. 3 miles of walking around my neighborhood after kids go to sleep, no electronics, no head covering). During that time, it is prayer (out loud, but softly), walking, and meditation. It takes about an hour and I try to do them 2-3 times per week. It is my time with God and it is the time that I learn from the Father. I highly highly recommend them. Anyway, during one of my prayer walks I asked God again to help me with my eyes and God put on my heart that I needed to abstain from [getting off]. I told God that I would give it up for a year. This is abnormally hard given that we aren't allowed to have sex during pregnancies and we have gone through 8 (only 3 have survived). It's a long time to go without sex. But anyway, I committed to God to do it. It was hard, but I was able to do it. Sex with my wife during this time wasn't better, but our relationship was changing. After about a month of my fasting, I was on a prayer walk. I was talking to God about it and He asked how it has been. I kind of gave Him a status report telling him that it had been hard, but good. My relationship with my wife felt good. It felt as if we were closer than we had been before. At a later time, my wife told me that the way I look at her is different. After telling God that is had been going well, He asked me a question that I never saw coming. He asked me "what about doing it for life?". I was a bit taken back as this is an area of my life that I've never even imagined giving up. It took me 0.75 miles and a few requests, but I agreed. I told him that I would do it. For the next two weeks, I literally grieved. Part of me was dying. I laid in bed grieving and my wife didn't understand. I didn't even ask her about it. Part of me died. That part of me no longer existed in myself. My sexuality could no longer come from myself. The only place that would exist was in my wife. I gave it to her and I told her about it and she said that she would take the responsibility for it, she was happy to. Part of what had to die was my unfulfilled and insatiable desires, in general, and for from my wife. No matter what she gave me before, I always wanted more. In cornography and in [getting off], I could feed it. But now, I could not.
Thanks To Our God almighty for helping us through this channel ❤All Glory to His Holy Name❤ Thank you Dear Sir and your entire Team 🎉God bless and keep you, your family and all your loved ones 🎉 Praying for all your salvation 🎉Thank You For Helping me
I hope you do not take this comment the wrong way as I am not trying to rebut what you are saying in this video but rather I am genuinely seeking what is good, true and beautiful. I am wondering how this line of reasoning doesn't also support unmarried couples looking at each other while they are naked if they are just trying to appreciate God's beauty manifested in the other person as a part of His creation. I feel that this would be wrong even with the best of intentions of both individuals. I do not think it is only an unwise action as it can easily lead to sin, but rather that it is inherently sinful. I do not view this as a tenable position as I feel that appreciating the sexual beauty of someone is an amazing thing, but sexual beauty should only be observed and appreciated in the confines of a marriage. I feel that divorcing the morality pertaining to the sexual act, which we agree should be limited to the confines of marriage, from the morality pertaining to admiring sexual beauty in general is a bad thing. I acknowledge that I do not have a strong moral argument to back this feeling up but rather just my conscience. I am very open to being wrong and I would really appreciate help understanding your view on sexual morality.
In the case of an unmarried couple looking at each other, scripture also warns us about not placing a stumbling block before one another and in my mind that situation is a clear stumbling block because the two are already (hopefully) physically attracted to one another and have significant hormonal activity going on. Even if they are able to look at one another without lust, just because an act is not necessarily sin does not make it wise. Amoral actions can be foolish and inadvisable depending on the context.
@@Presbybaptisational thank you so much for the reply. I definitely see where you are coming from, but I guess my objection is more so that I feel that would be inherently wrong and not just an amoral unwise action. I am also wondering how that does not also further stem into physical touching that is not the sexual act itself if one were trying to experience the sexual beauty described in the video without lust. I feel that would be inherently wrong not just unwise. But once again, thank you for the reply
Thank you for your honest comment. Christopher and his wife Wendy address more specific questions and give more detailed advice in their weekly podcast. Feel free to submit your question here: askchristopherwest.com/ask
Thank you so much, your content is immaculate and speaks the Truth. Your channel is very much needed in today’s satanic world and culture which only promote degeneracy, lust, ego and pride. Keep doing the amazing work and again, I thank you with all my heart. I send you guys love from Portugal! God bless you🙏🏼
Attraction is the light intoxication of lust, because the vice of lust is given birth through body consciousness. We are viewing that person based on who they are not... The aim is to have the awareness of the soul, soul consciousness, that we see all people, male or female as a spiritual entity, a soul,, a point of light that sparkles in the middle of the forehead. This might sound like a strange thing to do, however if you keep this practice of awareness you will begin to respect people with the dignity and respect they deserve irrespective what their external costume appears like.
Think about it. God gave us clothing for a reason. We reveal our body intimately only with our married spouse or non-intimately for medical purposes. We should not expose ourselves wantonly. Actually inappropriate nudeness has been a manifestation of the demon-possessed.
It has to do with cultural norms, too. When I was five, I got shut in with about eight others, of the same age--as adults, in the 60's were likely to do to you. And they all just went crazy, except me. I just laid back, on the floor, to wait for the adults to open the door. And as I laid there, I could hear two girls; one said, "why isn't he moving around like the other boys?", to this the other girl replied, "I don't know, but I know how to get him to move", she had a dress on, and she came over and stood over me. Before I could even move, a boy says, "hey, don't look up her dress!". And we can manipulate cultural norms from an early age.
@@TheologyoftheBodyInstitute Tell that to Bergoglio and his gay couple blessing initiative. Personally be more comfortable living in places like the Muslim world where women are covered from head to toe.
When God looks at us, do you think He is looking at the shape or gender of our bodies?... God's vision on us is the eternal self of who we truly are, the soul. This is the awareness of being soul conscious. The first mistake human beings made was to consider ourselves to be male or female.
Thank you for the question! We'd suggest going into our channel and checking out some of the videos related to the topic that Christopher has recorded. But also, in this playlist Christopher walks you through his whole book "Good News About Sex & Marriage" for free: th-cam.com/video/odcw19r57mw/w-d-xo.htmlsi=tohThhMzP0yl362-
Hello! Some questions are answered on the weekly Ask Christopher West podcast which you can find in any streaming platform. Few others are addressed in these videos.
As a personal trainer, I look at the body without lust. It's not that I'm not a sexual being, but a human body is a human body. I'm there to do a job. Even the most "appealing looking person" can look ugly to you when they have a terrible personality. So yes. This is very possible.
Question, can lust be desiring someone to fulfill some desire, even not sexual, for yourself. For someone else to be an object of your fulfillment, whatever that is?
The power of Christ will clean the well of my heart by daily taking up that cross, and trying to live sacramentally in the Church... This is not pulling myself up by my bootstraps, but opening myself to the Holy Spirit... Learning the dignity of the person at the school of beauty is not easy... Sarcophobia. Nice. Thank you for another killer video. I struggle more than most people. But I'm glad, very glad, I can watch videos like this.
It’s hard to understand God’s plan for experiencing the true beauty of a person, when the plan is simply to not experience the beauty. Except with one person, ever, and only strictly for procreation.
If you do it as a result of praising God because someone is fearfully and wonderfully made. Then the beauty is not credited to the person you're looking at but to God whom we worship anyway. You just found one more reason that God is good! Simply because everything God made is good. From this perspective, human lust is not activated. This messenger is correct
Wonder what you say to ER male doctors having to undress the patient. I mean if a person gonna lust because they see a naked body then working in a hospital be a temptation in that case
Attention all women !! especially the single ones ... take it to prayer and discern how to dress modestly and appropriately. Please learn and understand men's psychology and refrain from wearing extreme tight clothes like yoga pants ,spandex , Etc ....save it for your future husbands or special areas of the gym. Please stop wondering around everywhere with that kind of outfits. And you will help guard men's purity and custody of the eye.❤
definitely possible.. when you are suffering and denying the flesh with fasting when you bring Jesus into everything that we think.. we would be so aware and ashamed with that thought.. don't be alone and don't let your mind wander. FLEE!!
Thank you. Im dealing with erotic stories that a teenager daugther is reading.and AI characters. That is no other person but isnt what she experience lust too?
Thank you for your honest question @tereton1550 ! We’d highly recommend submitting your question to The Ask Christopher West Podcast where Christopher and his wife Wendy address more specific issues and give more detailed advice. Feel free to submit your question here: askchristopherwest.com/ask
Had it not been for attraction, aka "lust" humankind would have died off a long time ago. You can put a different name on it or try to sanctify it by frame it in a certain way like within a marriage but it is what it is. Human beings have a hard time framing the same thing in such vastly different angles, it's confusing and the reason why so many people have so many issues in this area... Purity culture has caused more harm than good...
Lust is not the same thing as sexual attraction, though. That's where the misunderstanding arises. Sexual desire is good and natural and, yes, needed for the reason you mentioned. Lust, on the other hand, is reducing a whole person down to someone's sexual use of them, for instance, a woman in a porn video being seen purely for the viewer's self gratification.
Thank you for your comment! If you are open to it, we invite you to watch this video where a clear distinction is made of the difference between lust and attraction: th-cam.com/video/C2_1QAL_t8M/w-d-xo.html
@@blondetapperware8289 No, sexual attraction and "lust" are the same thing, they are biological responses to stimuli, You can be intellectually/emotionally/spiritually attracted to a person and have not be sexually attracted to them and vice versa. But if you need to muddy the water to make something that you have been taught was bad/non holy, etc. feel ok once you jump through whatever hoop you have to make it no longer deemed a bad thing then so be it. And lets not get into the conflicting messages being conveyed about "reducing a whole person down to someone's sexual use of them" becasue a lot of the marriage/sex advice given from religious sectors does just that, especially when it comes to women fulfilling men's sexual needs... This is what happens when you have to fill in the blanks when there is not a lot of detail to go buy from your source.
@@r.walker7986 I'm sorry you feel that way, but where does Catholicism teach that a person, specifically women, should be reduced down to fulfill another's sexual usage? Being a Catholic woman myself, I have found my faith's view of sexuality utterly refreshing and fulfilling as it has looked on my desires and personhood in a way that no other source has. We don't view sexuality as bad, but edifying.
So can a Christian man just gaze at all the women on the beach in bikinis in the name of appreciating “beauty” and not call it lust? That kind of view is… ridiculous.
Thank you for sharing your comment. We invite you to watch the video referenced for a more wholesome view of what Christopher actually meant: th-cam.com/video/C2_1QAL_t8M/w-d-xo.html
Instead of endless debate about theology and ideas, let's do what Jesus did. He went out into the world and increased tolerance and forgiveness and love and progress. Are you afraid of doing that? Isn't that the issue?
I saw the headline, didn’t watch the video. I can tell you right now, no is the answer. If Christ is truly the King of kings, men need to only obey. Women as well. Women who scandalize our existence by dressing like corvettes are in grave sin. Men who look, are in the same boat. Purity is not hard, if you put Christ in His proper perspective. We owe Him nothing, except everything.
Matthew 19:26 NIV Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” You are correct. With God things are possible. For us it is impossible. The question then becomes is God with you?
I think it is possible, from an artistic perspective. Generally however, lust creeps up when you naturally find the body attractive. I like the Catholic idea of “give the second look to God”… when your gaze locks on an attractive person, look up. The first look isn’t wrong, but beyond…
I am Christian man and have married to a gorgeous, wonderful, faithful woman for over 34 years. I am still trying to fight a lifelong battle with lust/porn and masturbation. I confess, that since I have damaged myself with what i have feasted my eyes and mind on all these decades, that I cannot look at an attractive woman and not give into lustful thoughts. Heck, I cant even be in church and be near an attractive female without having tempting imaginations. Its so bad I even envy the man that might be her husband and how good the sex is between them. Terrible thoughts. I have so many warped feelings about sex and sexuality. Sex is such a burden to me now. I get almost paralyzed in the presence of a really attractive woman/ great figure. Someone please pray for me to starve my eyes. I beg anybody who reads this...stop looking at porn TODAY. Stop looking at impure and titillating videos here on Y.T. STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is the video referenced: th-cam.com/video/C2_1QAL_t8M/w-d-xo.html
As a woman who is on a journey of freedom from porn. I’ve noticed that since taking the journey seriously over 3 months ago I’ve come to see how 8 years of being addicted has blinded me to the beauty of the body and made me deaf to the prophetic message that the body speaks. The last three months have been a cleansing of my eyes, a daily washing out of all the crud with the holy waters of Theology of the Body so that I can see the beauty of the male body and gaze upon it in a holy way. Sometimes it’s easier than other times and I have a long way to go to win the war but each day that I head into the lustful battle and learn to see my brothers in Christ righty is a win. You can break free from lust. As said is Luke 1:37 “For nothing will be Impossible with God” Thank you Christopher for all that you do. God Bless You!!!
Thank your for sharing your witness of hope. Keep fighting the good fight, sister!
God bless you! Thank you for sharing.
I feel like it too, you are not alone, may our Lord guve us his sight so we can admire the beauty without lust, and with legit love to our neighbors
@croatiangambler8059 I’m 23 too, soon to be 24 in a couple weeks. I know how hard it is. I was free for a year at one point and relapsed. Don’t white knuckle this journey. Stay strong brother. Small battle victories ultimately wins the war.
Been 6 months for me, i love hearing women share their testimony on this because both sexes struggle and men are not creeps for addiction, nor are women whores for the same addiction, rather we are just looking for christ in the wrong places
"We do not see things as they are, We see things as we are." -Anais Nin
"The God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give unto you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of him: the eyes of your understanding being enlightened..." Ephesians 1:17-18
As an artist, drawing the human form professionally is done without lust. If mixing the two you loose sight of your goal to produce a work of art.
Absolutely. If lust was involved the art would not get made.
Beautiful reflection! This book published by the Theology of the Body Institute goes deep into what you shared: shop.corproject.com/products/god-is-beauty-a-retreat-on-the-gospel-art
I have that book. My wife bought it for me for Christmas a couple of years and I thoroughly enjoyed it.
I don’t think that’s true really
As a christain artist myself. Even I'm pondering on such. What is the difference between nude art and porn? Is drawing boobs really a sin? And if someone masturbates to that nude art, is that artist going to hell, even if the art was never meant for porn purposes?
I have been praying for God to cleanse my heart and mind of lust so I can appreciate the beauty of women as God’s creation.
Keep fighting the good fight! Praying for you.
@@TheologyoftheBodyInstitute Thank you and God bless!!
"To the perverted, all things are perverted." - Jesus, Poem of the Man-God
Deep
I'm not even a formally converted Christian or Catholic but I thought all of this was very well said. Sins are missed aims towards real goods. Of course there's a good way to look at a body and even desire its intrinsic goodness.
Thank you for watching! We believe the principles we're covering are universal and resonate with every human being who is in touch with his humanity.
Trying so hard to break my own sinful habit of over 3 decades. I’ve been a psychotherapist for almost 2 decades, and actually have specialities in addiction. Only this past year did I come back to the Catholic Church (and ON FIRE for Christ!) and still . . . my lustful ways persist. Please pray for me.
🙏 on it
What if you're a woman "noticing" how you're husband is "appreciating the beauty" of another woman's body? Especially if you are incapable of "matching up".
Or, what if you are a man who is "noticing" your wife "appreciating" another man's body? And, you can't "match up" either.
I have seen so many married couples who have far less than beautiful bodies and who are incredibly devoted to keeping their eyes to themselves.
It's absolutely impressive and beautiful!
There's more to this Chris...
And I have seen both genders "crazy in love" with their imperfect bodied partners.
We love the soul of the one we truly love. I would never want to take a chance on hurting the one I love by causing them to feel lesser than... I refuse to find a back door way of taming my hormones.
Go deeper...not just in the awesome thoughts you set forth, but in the value of the soul of the person you call yours.
Utilize the Holy Spirit by asking Him to help your weakness and strengthen your good points. Get close to Him in every area of your life. Few do. Know why you are worshipping your Creator and love Him in return.
I'm using the word "you" in a rhetorical way. You yourself have given me no reason to disrespect you.
Go workout more. Being physically strong is a very good thing. That applies to woman too. You think you got her body like that just from sitting in front of the couch? God Bless
A christian shouldn't do something that upsets their spouse unnecessarily. Even if it's something permissible. And in case one of the spouses even does something wrong, as to look with lust, the one who is on path to holiness is to not let him or herself have his or her interior peace disturbed, but rather pray for their spouse, and use it as a chance to purify themselves from vanity and ego.
We are to always turn into good the bad that others do towards us, and to be careful not to provoke others.
Now, supposing we have a couple of saints. They'll both trust one another, will both be able to see true beauty with no lust, will both be able to see someone who looks better than themselves without feeling envy or without even comparing, for they'll have no inordinate desire for pleasure. So they would look at human beauty as someone who looks at the sea or the sky. The same way as little children would do.
As an artist. I can tell you this is true. One can look upon the human body, recognize it for the beautiful image it is and language it speaks and the actual person there, while not lusting. When you can love the other and look to the other and truly see the other, it is truly possible to recognize where physical attraction comes from and then master it by appreciating why there is attraction and then place it in proper order. Lust is a disordered understanding of the human body and sexuality.
"Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?" Our bodies a holy temples made in the image of God. Lets not desecrate the temple self and others but to appreciate its beauty in function in a way that glorifies God
Our hunger for beauty is hunger for God.
Thank you for seeking to help people understand the truth about the body. I am currently on a journey away from a life of promiscuity and toward a life of freedom in Christ's grace, and your work has impacted me greatly. I agree with everything that you had to say in this video. I guess one thing that I wrestle with in my mind, though, is if a woman is dressed inappropriately, shouldn't I look away. Like if a woman is dressed modestly it is not difficult for me to appreciate her beauty without feeling the temptation to lust. It is when a woman is dressed immodestly that I feel the greatest urge to look away.
Praise God for your witness, brother! Christopher and his wife Wendy address more specific questions and give more detailed advice in their weekly podcast. Feel free to submit your question here: askchristopherwest.com/ask .
Yes submit this question I would love to hear it on the podcast🤍
@@JorgeAlxsRod I submitted it yesterday!
I fell hard this past week; thank you so much for helping me reorient myself. I’m currently two chapters into Eating the Sunrise and it’s fantastic!! God bless you guys!
thinking of a hate comment i can leave on this vid so I can get a free copy of eating the sunrise🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔😹😹
Ha! That's funny.
God bless you and this channel !!!!!!
God bless you, too. Thank you for being a regular viewer!
My biggest issue with this right now is meditative prayer. I can't stop from letting sexual things sneak into my head. I'm praying that our Lord heals me unless this be a cross I must carry, outside of my head it's easy to respect people even if they do not respect themselves but in my heart I'm still suffering the porn addiction I had from 13 to 28. Its my imagination thats at issue.
Thank you for sharing your struggle, brother! Keep fighting the good fight. We will be posting a video related to this topic in the next few weeks.
Ask the Lord to introduce you to our Blessed Mother, His mother....She has a special role on struggles with purity❤
I can assure you, I'm Not the only one in the path of freedom, growth, & Joy .
Lack of bonding with our parents plays a big part.
You Will regain innocence ❤
In God's time🙏.
Don't forget to receive the Eucharist, in a state of grace.
@@botijahon8869 thank you, I have been praying 3 rosaries, morning, before noon and afternoon and I have seen a difference in general and in my thoughts. In God's time... Exactly. Thank you and God bless you and keep you
Certain people might have a diminished ability to “gaze upon” physical beauty without falling into lust. This doesn’t mean that physical beauty is inherently bad, but that for some reason or another certain people have to be careful or even stay away completely from resting their eyes on the physical form of someone they find sexually attractive.
Like with the consumption of alcohol, some people have to be strict with themselves, whereas others don’t seem to have a problem with moderation.
Open the eyes of my heart Lord , I want to see You !
Amen!
Great analysis!!
Thanks for watching!
Please keep me in your prayers Brothers and Sisters in Christ, I've struggled for 9 years and I'm tired of lust. I ask God to help me, but it feels like God is ignoring me because of my disobedience, How do I look at women the correct way? I can't see a woman, stop and pray saying "Thank you God for the beauty of that woman!" That woman would see me pray and question me. I have no courage, so I can't begin dating, I feel years away from having friends. What is the step by step process of looking at woman correctly?
God ALWAYS helps the ones who repent. But you probably experience the consequences of your past sins. They have put in you bad habits, which you must replace with virtue. A prayer can be saying a short sentence in your head, like "Thank you Lord for making her beautiful, help me to respect her dignity", and then continue your walk, that's enough.
Fighting and avoiding lust of the eyes is a practice that has a strong link to porn, whether or not you are in a happy marriage and your prayer life. I understand you are in a catch 22.
My suggestion is to start with prayer, develop a routine everyday. I don't know if your Catholic or not but please don't let that get in the way of the suggestion below (especially when you read the text of the prayers suggested).
Fr. Chad Ripperger has published a prayer book called Deliverance Prayers (For the Laity). There's a number of prayed in there that have helped me. I would suggest for you, the healing prayer on page 83 or 85. There's a real good one on page 33 to help to be freed from evil habits. If you want, I can give you the text of the prayers here, let me know.
Prayer to be freed from evil habits - Give me, I beseech thee, O Holy Spirit, giver of all good gifts, that powerful grace which converts the stony hearts of mortals into burning furnaces of love. By Thy grace, free my captive soul from the thraldom of every evil habit and concupiscence, to restore to it the holy liberty of the children of God. Give me to taste how sweet it is to serve the Lord and crucify the flesh with its vices and concupiscences. Enlarge my heart that I may ever cheerfully run the way of Thy Commandments until I reach the goal of my aspirations, the joys and bliss of Thy habitation in heaven. Amen.
Starting with a consistent prayer life helps you build the habits to then avoid porn. Which then helps you control your gaze. Which then should be helping you interact with women.
God bless you brother.
Repent, fast, and avoid "the occasions of sins"
If your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out. Do not frequent places where women are immodest etc.
In time, your brain will rewire itself, and you wouldn't even to take drastic measures.
Find someone and get married.
I disagree with those who say you can’t appreciate beauty without lust. But around 08:05 you said “potent papal proclamation.” Just want to clarify you aren’t saying that theology of the body is magisterial since it’s a private work of theology by Karol Wojtyla, not a document under the papal authority of John Paul II
The fact that a doctor or another person can do the profession at hand with relative authenticity and integrity says enough by itself.
Bottom line: If you have a purpose behind the person you are when you look out at someone or something in the world, maintaining your integral connection to the purpose within you will ultimately dictate how you look at the person or thing you see in the world. Hence, you can totally look at a very attractive person and acknowledge that they are attractive without being distracted by the physical beauty because your purpose and focuses are distinctly targeted toward other things.
Reconsider how the doctor who needs to save an attractive person better not be thinking how hot the person is while giving into the flesh. Instead, the doctor is thinking only of what it takes to keep a human body alive and how that relates to repairing the anatomy of the person/ organism at hand, COMPLETELY DISREGARDING any possible esthetic considerations. A doctor does that all day. it's just an example, but I think it conveyd the message pretty well.
GOD Have Mercy and Bless us all on this difficult journey; in The Mighty, Magnificent, and RIGHTEOUS Names of Jesus and The Holy Spirit; amen ✝️🙏🏾
Hi Christopher, thank you for your videos. I'm a Catholic convert and this Easter will be my two year mark. I was thoroughly addicted to porn and still struggle on that front. However, your apostolate has been a great blessing to me. God bless you. Saint Pope John Paul II pray for us!
Welcome home, brother. Keep fighting the good fight, we're praying for you!
I am 20 years. I have fought against bad passions, lust, selfishness, pornography. I believe in the goodness, the beauty, the dignity of the human body. I always ask Saint Joseph Most Chaste for his intercession. Sometimes for me seeing the beauty of the body has meant seeing something ordinary that becomes extraordinary when it loves, a body that loves and that serves is extraordinary.
I think it is possible.
1) Lust is as bad posture and technique in sports. For example, in baseball it's impossible to make contact with a ball coming at you at 90 mph. However, if one develops the habit of a good swing and trains the mind and meory to not only not fear the ball but to address it with the bat, then one can make contact.
2) As the ex-lustful man that I pretend to be, I need to keep praying the Rosary so that my soul (expressed in my body) incarnates the inspiration to develop the virtue of celebrate beauty expressed in the body of someone else.
3) One can see that in the always perfect holy virgin Maria of Guadalupe the fact that a 500-year impression on Juan Diego's tilma is an impossible hallmark even with today's knowledge, in as much is for us modern minds to possibility of thinking beyond lust.
4) By virtue of the glory of God, this translates that my lustful traits are nothing compared to the redemption power of Christ in my soul. There is no enough sin that matches God's covenant.
Amen!
Thank you for this video,and in particular, addressing that person’s comment from the other video. I read that very same comment and was sorry I that I’ve heard the same sentiment expressed by people I know in my life. Now I have something to share with them that isn’t condescending, condemning, or even threatening. This was so important for me to watch and really listen to. As a (born into it) Catholic who is trying to really understand and connect with it (and one who had a “Catholic” father who was an extremely poor example of one) I very much needed this. Thank you again and again. Thank you for this channel 🙏🏼🙏🏼
We're so glad it blessed you! Please pray for us.
Hey I watched you on pints with Aquinas and was very impressed by your thoughts on sex, not Roman Catholic, but I have a new found respect for it in this regard, great work, you have a gift 🎁
All glory to God! We invite you to keep going deeper into how our bodies point us to the eternal love of the Trinity!
I guess you never ventured in midtown Manhattan at lunchtime during July
Lust = Obsession
Just don't obsess over someone by willfully fantasizing about doing sexual acts with them and you'll be fine.
It's okay to eat something that tastes good, it's a sin to become gluttonous with it.
This is the same principle. It's okay to admire beauty (eat a cupcake), but it's not okay to go full out and fantasize about everything you want to do with that beauty (eating the whole dozen of cupcakes).
I have searched for freedom,in and through many ways as a child because of family occult agreements,at 10 years old I was not allowed to go near our neighbor's daughters.my mind and body was permeated with Lust.i grew up in self hatred seeking vengeance on every woman I met through sexual control. Lust and perversion were my companions of the dark room.i went for much DELIVERENCE,only to fall back in many ways.the journey is slow but Christs long suffering with me,has opened a door of hope,this my 83 year,I want to.thank Almighty God for the fullness of light to enter using you as his channel,to all those who hear this teaching of this ANOINTED man,dont close the door on your freedom,because of the Masonic curse of the phallic symbol agreements of our forefathers,May Christ shed blood break all agreements and set us free.
Deepest suspicion is deepest cynicism.
Because I lust, therefore everyone does.
Because I haven't opened my heart to God therefore there is no God.
I could speak of my own personal experience but such 3rd. party talk from other people never healed my own cynicism.
Pure, unadulterated lust is a pure unadulterated chain that binds our freedom and refuses to let us see any other possibility, and because I can't see it; it can't possibly exist.
Thankyou brother 🙏 for another amazing message, soooo beautiful and true!
God’s beauty is in all creation can be Loved and appreciated in a pure, holy way that brings greater union with God!
Amen to that!
I'm only a few minutes in, and I like where this is going so far. That being said, I want to say this right away, because I suspect it won't be addressed based on what I've heard so far. Lust isn't the only thing at stake. Modesty comes to mind as well, and part of that is custody of the eyes. So, you could say that it's possible to look at the beauty of another person without lusting after them, but should you be looking in the first place?
Awesome content. Just started to watch this channel, God bless.
We're so glad it blessed you! Keep going deeper.
Well Done my friend, well done indeed🙏
You are a great man Christopher West and I look up to you.
All glory to God!
Beautiful Christopher. Thank you 🙏
Thank you for watching!
Thank you Christopher! I am a regular watcher/listener and you and JP2 through you have changed my life and continue to do so! ❤️
All glory to God! We invite you to keep going deeper into this great teaching through the resources the Institute and many others provide.
As a chaste married man, I can attest that it is possible.
@breadandcircuses8127I don't have all of the answers, but I'll give you my personal story. I apologize now that this is long.
I struggled with pornography since my youth. I abstained and kept myself for my wife, as did she, but I was a slave to my desires. With porn, I fought it hard. I used all of the tools and techniques to fight it, but ultimately, I always fell. Sometimes it took months, other times week, other times only days. God has been working on me for a while, but about 5 years ago, I started doing a lot of biblical study and started teaching kids. One day, I was talking with a friend of mine and the topic of a recently fallen Christian came up. My friend spoke a truth to me. He said "we don't not look at porn because it's good for us. We don't look at it BECAUSE we love God more than we love it". I believe it was the holy spirit speaking. In that moment I recognized it as truth and it permanently changed me. Without any struggle, my 20-year struggle with porn died. Here is what I believe to be true. In the moment of temptation, there is no human logic that can counter the flesh. In the moment, the temptation is what is good for the flesh, which is why our tools and logic fail. In the moment, however, I can choose to give us what is good me (in the flesh) because I love something more. That something more is God. It is my love for Him that prevents me from looking at porn. God becomes my strength. I no longer rely on my own. My chains were broken.
Fast forward a bit. While I hadn't looked at pornography or struggled with pornography for a year and a half or so, I still struggled with lust and sexual impurity. I found myself being drawn to things that were attractive. It came to a head when we went to two water parks as a family. My eyes betrayed me. There's a lot of beauty to admire and I found myself with no self-control. During the second water park trip, I asked God to help me with it.
One of the best tools that has helped me is doing prayer walks (i.e. 3 miles of walking around my neighborhood after kids go to sleep, no electronics, no head covering). During that time, it is prayer (out loud, but softly), walking, and meditation. It takes about an hour and I try to do them 2-3 times per week. It is my time with God and it is the time that I learn from the Father. I highly highly recommend them. Anyway, during one of my prayer walks I asked God again to help me with my eyes and God put on my heart that I needed to abstain from masturbation. I told God that I would give it up for a year. This is abnormally hard given that we aren't allowed to have sex during pregnancies and we have gone through 8 (only 3 have survived). It's a long time to go without sex. But anyway, I committed to God to do it. It was hard, but I was able to do it. Sex with my wife during this time wasn't better, but our relationship was changing.
After about a month of my fasting, I was on a prayer walk. I was talking to God about it and He asked how it has been. I kind of gave Him a status report telling him that it had been hard, but good. My relationship with my wife felt good. It felt as if we were closer than we had been before. At a later time, my wife told me that the way I look at her is different. After telling God that is had been going well, He asked me a question that I never saw coming. He asked me "what about doing it for life?". I was a bit taken back as this is an area of my life that I've never even imagined giving up. It took me 0.75 miles and a few requests, but I agreed. I told him that I would do it.
For the next two weeks, I literally grieved. Part of me was dying. I laid in bed grieving and my wife didn't understand. I didn't even ask her about it. Part of me died. That part of me no longer existed in myself. My sexuality could no longer come from myself. The only place that would exist was in my wife. I gave it to her and I told her about it and she said that she would take the responsibility for it, she was happy to. Part of what had to die was my unfulfilled and insatiable desires, in general, and for from my wife. No matter what she gave me before, I always wanted more. In pornography and in masturbation, I could feed it. But now, I could not.
What I later realized was that I had never truly been dependent upon my wife for anything. I didn't need her. I had ways to get what I needed from elsewhere. But now, I didn't. I had to become vulnerable and dependent on her for part of who I am. I was no longer whole, for part of me was missing. The only way for me to be whole was with her. My insatiable sexual desires died. My desires for my wife replaced it. While the sex wasn't better at the beginning, it turned into the best sex of my life, every time I am with her, I am satisfied and fulfilled. I am fully hers and all of my sexuality resides in her. For the first time of my life, I am sexually pure.
It's coming up on two years now that I made my covenant with God. All I can say is that the worst thing for me personally, is the absolute best thing for us. When I see something attractive (person, image, video) or inappropriate (revealing clothing), I don't experience desire for them. My sexuality doesn't come from them and can't be satisfied from them. It comes from and is satisfied by my wife. The intimacy that I experience with her just cannot be replaced by someone else. My automatic lusting desires that would normally occur in day to day situations is no longer there.
I hope that helps. If you have questions, let me know. I know that was long.
@breadandcircuses8127 Where you able to see my comment? I'm not sure why it isn't showing up.
@breadandcircuses8127 That's annoying. Attempt number 2. I'll going to change words a bit in case it's blocking it based on hot topic words.
@breadandcircuses8127 Part 1) I don't have all of the answers, but I'll give you my personal story. I apologize now that this is long.
I struggled with Cornography since my youth. I abstained and kept myself for my wife, as did she, but I was a slave to my desires. With corn, I fought it hard. I used all of the tools and techniques to fight it, but ultimately, I always fell. Sometimes it took months, other times week, other times only days. God has been working on me for a while, but about 5 years ago, I started doing a lot of biblical study and started teaching kids. One day, I was talking with a friend of mine and the topic of a recently fallen Christian came up. My friend spoke a truth to me. He said "we don't not look at corn because it's good for us. We don't look at it BECAUSE we love God more than we love it". I believe it was the holy spirit speaking. In that moment I recognized it as truth and it permanently changed me. Without any struggle, my 20-year struggle with corn died. Here is what I believe to be true. In the moment of temptation, there is no human logic that can counter the flesh. In the moment, the temptation is what is good for the flesh, which is why our tools and logic fail. In the moment, however, I can choose to give us what is good me (in the flesh) because I love something more. That something more is God. It is my love for Him that prevents me from looking at corn. God becomes my strength. I no longer rely on my own. My chains were broken.
Fast forward a bit. While I hadn't looked at cornography or struggled with cornography for a year and a half or so, I still struggled with lust and sexual impurity. I found myself being drawn to things that were attractive. It came to a head when we went to two water parks as a family. My eyes betrayed me. There's a lot of beauty to admire and I found myself with no self-control. During the second water park trip, I asked God to help me with it.
@breadandcircuses8127 Part 2) One of the best tools that has helped me is doing prayer walks (i.e. 3 miles of walking around my neighborhood after kids go to sleep, no electronics, no head covering). During that time, it is prayer (out loud, but softly), walking, and meditation. It takes about an hour and I try to do them 2-3 times per week. It is my time with God and it is the time that I learn from the Father. I highly highly recommend them. Anyway, during one of my prayer walks I asked God again to help me with my eyes and God put on my heart that I needed to abstain from [getting off]. I told God that I would give it up for a year. This is abnormally hard given that we aren't allowed to have sex during pregnancies and we have gone through 8 (only 3 have survived). It's a long time to go without sex. But anyway, I committed to God to do it. It was hard, but I was able to do it. Sex with my wife during this time wasn't better, but our relationship was changing.
After about a month of my fasting, I was on a prayer walk. I was talking to God about it and He asked how it has been. I kind of gave Him a status report telling him that it had been hard, but good. My relationship with my wife felt good. It felt as if we were closer than we had been before. At a later time, my wife told me that the way I look at her is different. After telling God that is had been going well, He asked me a question that I never saw coming. He asked me "what about doing it for life?". I was a bit taken back as this is an area of my life that I've never even imagined giving up. It took me 0.75 miles and a few requests, but I agreed. I told him that I would do it.
For the next two weeks, I literally grieved. Part of me was dying. I laid in bed grieving and my wife didn't understand. I didn't even ask her about it. Part of me died. That part of me no longer existed in myself. My sexuality could no longer come from myself. The only place that would exist was in my wife. I gave it to her and I told her about it and she said that she would take the responsibility for it, she was happy to. Part of what had to die was my unfulfilled and insatiable desires, in general, and for from my wife. No matter what she gave me before, I always wanted more. In cornography and in [getting off], I could feed it. But now, I could not.
One way of working through this challenge is to say and pray, “How beautiful you are in your dwelling place on Lord”
Oh Lord
Amen!
Thanks To Our God almighty for helping us through this channel ❤All Glory to His Holy Name❤ Thank you Dear Sir and your entire Team 🎉God bless and keep you, your family and all your loved ones 🎉 Praying for all your salvation 🎉Thank You For Helping me
Thank you for clarifying this theology of the body is a very hard to read and alot of it has flown over my head
God is merciful, thanks be to God!
Amen!
I hope you do not take this comment the wrong way as I am not trying to rebut what you are saying in this video but rather I am genuinely seeking what is good, true and beautiful. I am wondering how this line of reasoning doesn't also support unmarried couples looking at each other while they are naked if they are just trying to appreciate God's beauty manifested in the other person as a part of His creation. I feel that this would be wrong even with the best of intentions of both individuals. I do not think it is only an unwise action as it can easily lead to sin, but rather that it is inherently sinful. I do not view this as a tenable position as I feel that appreciating the sexual beauty of someone is an amazing thing, but sexual beauty should only be observed and appreciated in the confines of a marriage. I feel that divorcing the morality pertaining to the sexual act, which we agree should be limited to the confines of marriage, from the morality pertaining to admiring sexual beauty in general is a bad thing. I acknowledge that I do not have a strong moral argument to back this feeling up but rather just my conscience. I am very open to being wrong and I would really appreciate help understanding your view on sexual morality.
In the case of an unmarried couple looking at each other, scripture also warns us about not placing a stumbling block before one another and in my mind that situation is a clear stumbling block because the two are already (hopefully) physically attracted to one another and have significant hormonal activity going on. Even if they are able to look at one another without lust, just because an act is not necessarily sin does not make it wise. Amoral actions can be foolish and inadvisable depending on the context.
@@Presbybaptisational thank you so much for the reply. I definitely see where you are coming from, but I guess my objection is more so that I feel that would be inherently wrong and not just an amoral unwise action. I am also wondering how that does not also further stem into physical touching that is not the sexual act itself if one were trying to experience the sexual beauty described in the video without lust. I feel that would be inherently wrong not just unwise. But once again, thank you for the reply
Thank you for your honest comment. Christopher and his wife Wendy address more specific questions and give more detailed advice in their weekly podcast. Feel free to submit your question here: askchristopherwest.com/ask
@@TheologyoftheBodyInstitute Thank you! I will submit my question
Thank you so much, your content is immaculate and speaks the Truth. Your channel is very much needed in today’s satanic world and culture which only promote degeneracy, lust, ego and pride.
Keep doing the amazing work and again, I thank you with all my heart.
I send you guys love from Portugal!
God bless you🙏🏼
As a woman, I didn’t realise how serious of an issue lust is for men.
If it is possible than its not worth looking
Attraction is the light intoxication of lust, because the vice of lust is given birth through body consciousness. We are viewing that person based on who they are not... The aim is to have the awareness of the soul, soul consciousness, that we see all people, male or female as a spiritual entity, a soul,, a point of light that sparkles in the middle of the forehead. This might sound like a strange thing to do, however if you keep this practice of awareness you will begin to respect people with the dignity and respect they deserve irrespective what their external costume appears like.
good question
The sacramental-sexual union is pointing to the bridal mystery of God's (groom) union with us (bride).
Amazing
Thanks for watching!
thank you
You're so welcome!
I think it’s possible to look at bodies without lust, but if it’s sexual acts it becomes porn and that’s lust.
What is your opinion of Nudist philosophy? Or nudism for christians? Serious question. Thanks
Think about it. God gave us clothing for a reason. We reveal our body intimately only with our married spouse or non-intimately for medical purposes. We should not expose ourselves wantonly. Actually inappropriate nudeness has been a manifestation of the demon-possessed.
It has to do with cultural norms, too. When I was five, I got shut in with about eight others, of the same age--as adults, in the 60's were likely to do to you. And they all just went crazy, except me. I just laid back, on the floor, to wait for the adults to open the door. And as I laid there, I could hear two girls; one said, "why isn't he moving around like the other boys?", to this the other girl replied, "I don't know, but I know how to get him to move", she had a dress on, and she came over and stood over me. Before I could even move, a boy says, "hey, don't look up her dress!". And we can manipulate cultural norms from an early age.
I appreciate bodies all the time without Lusting them. 😊❤
BS
@@sergesavard636
Sorry..you sound like a luster! You usually are what you judge. God has Blessed me very much.
@@kathleenwharton2139 Guilty as charged, West is puritan weirdo.
Blessed are the pure of heart for they shall see God! (Mt 5:8)
@@TheologyoftheBodyInstitute Tell that to Bergoglio and his gay couple blessing initiative. Personally be more comfortable living in places like the Muslim world where women are covered from head to toe.
When God looks at us, do you think He is looking at the shape or gender of our bodies?... God's vision on us is the eternal self of who we truly are, the soul. This is the awareness of being soul conscious. The first mistake human beings made was to consider ourselves to be male or female.
Is there a way for me to get better without having to buy a book? I just want the lustful thoughts and dreams to go away
Thank you for the question! We'd suggest going into our channel and checking out some of the videos related to the topic that Christopher has recorded. But also, in this playlist Christopher walks you through his whole book "Good News About Sex & Marriage" for free: th-cam.com/video/odcw19r57mw/w-d-xo.htmlsi=tohThhMzP0yl362-
Hello If we sent a question in using the form where can we watch the response?
Hello! Some questions are answered on the weekly Ask Christopher West podcast which you can find in any streaming platform. Few others are addressed in these videos.
As a personal trainer, I look at the body without lust. It's not that I'm not a sexual being, but a human body is a human body. I'm there to do a job.
Even the most "appealing looking person" can look ugly to you when they have a terrible personality.
So yes. This is very possible.
You have to "turn off" a part of yourself to be able to do the job.
For Catholics, the personal trainer should be of the same sex to avoid temptation.
We're glad it's helpful!
Question, can lust be desiring someone to fulfill some desire, even not sexual, for yourself. For someone else to be an object of your fulfillment, whatever that is?
The power of Christ will clean the well of my heart by daily taking up that cross, and trying to live sacramentally in the Church...
This is not pulling myself up by my bootstraps, but opening myself to the Holy Spirit...
Learning the dignity of the person at the school of beauty is not easy...
Sarcophobia. Nice.
Thank you for another killer video. I struggle more than most people. But I'm glad, very glad, I can watch videos like this.
It’s hard to understand God’s plan for experiencing the true beauty of a person, when the plan is simply to not experience the beauty. Except with one person, ever, and only strictly for procreation.
I wanna be free, where’s the book at
On the other video you also mention about not to take other’s dignity for our satisfaction. What about consensual sex that satisfies both?
Yes possible but not advisable.
Is nightfall a sin
If you do it as a result of praising God because someone is fearfully and wonderfully made. Then the beauty is not credited to the person you're looking at but to God whom we worship anyway. You just found one more reason that God is good! Simply because everything God made is good. From this perspective, human lust is not activated. This messenger is correct
Only by the power of the Holy Spirit
Wonder what you say to ER male doctors having to undress the patient. I mean if a person gonna lust because they see a naked body then working in a hospital be a temptation in that case
Attention all women !! especially the single ones ...
take it to prayer and discern how to dress modestly and appropriately. Please learn and understand men's psychology and refrain from wearing extreme tight clothes like yoga pants ,spandex , Etc ....save it for your future husbands or special areas of the gym. Please stop wondering around everywhere with that kind of outfits. And you will help guard men's purity and custody of the eye.❤
definitely possible.. when you are suffering and denying the flesh with fasting
when you bring Jesus into everything that we think.. we would be so aware and ashamed with that thought.. don't be alone and don't let your mind wander. FLEE!!
TOB free
Thank you. Im dealing with erotic stories that a teenager daugther is reading.and AI characters. That is no other person but isnt what she experience lust too?
Thank you for your honest question @tereton1550 ! We’d highly recommend submitting your question to The Ask Christopher West Podcast where Christopher and his wife Wendy address more specific issues and give more detailed advice. Feel free to submit your question here: askchristopherwest.com/ask
Possible !!! After Quit Pornography With CHRIST JESUS Our LORD Help
My good sir the real test is Instagram
Well, self blinding is an option. 😂
Christopher West is probably one of the most grotesque sophists I've ever seen.
Had it not been for attraction, aka "lust" humankind would have died off a long time ago. You can put a different name on it or try to sanctify it by frame it in a certain way like within a marriage but it is what it is. Human beings have a hard time framing the same thing in such vastly different angles, it's confusing and the reason why so many people have so many issues in this area... Purity culture has caused more harm than good...
Lust is not the same thing as sexual attraction, though. That's where the misunderstanding arises. Sexual desire is good and natural and, yes, needed for the reason you mentioned. Lust, on the other hand, is reducing a whole person down to someone's sexual use of them, for instance, a woman in a porn video being seen purely for the viewer's self gratification.
Thank you for your comment! If you are open to it, we invite you to watch this video where a clear distinction is made of the difference between lust and attraction: th-cam.com/video/C2_1QAL_t8M/w-d-xo.html
@@blondetapperware8289 No, sexual attraction and "lust" are the same thing, they are biological responses to stimuli, You can be intellectually/emotionally/spiritually attracted to a person and have not be sexually attracted to them and vice versa. But if you need to muddy the water to make something that you have been taught was bad/non holy, etc. feel ok once you jump through whatever hoop you have to make it no longer deemed a bad thing then so be it. And lets not get into the conflicting messages being conveyed about "reducing a whole person down to someone's sexual use of them" becasue a lot of the marriage/sex advice given from religious sectors does just that, especially when it comes to women fulfilling men's sexual needs... This is what happens when you have to fill in the blanks when there is not a lot of detail to go buy from your source.
@@r.walker7986 I'm sorry you feel that way, but where does Catholicism teach that a person, specifically women, should be reduced down to fulfill another's sexual usage? Being a Catholic woman myself, I have found my faith's view of sexuality utterly refreshing and fulfilling as it has looked on my desires and personhood in a way that no other source has. We don't view sexuality as bad, but edifying.
@@blondetapperware8289 you gotta get out more...
So can a Christian man just gaze at all the women on the beach in bikinis in the name of appreciating “beauty” and not call it lust? That kind of view is… ridiculous.
Thank you for sharing your comment. We invite you to watch the video referenced for a more wholesome view of what Christopher actually meant: th-cam.com/video/C2_1QAL_t8M/w-d-xo.html
Instead of endless debate about theology and ideas, let's do what Jesus did. He went out into the world and increased tolerance and forgiveness and love and progress. Are you afraid of doing that? Isn't that the issue?
We must not tolerate evil.
I saw the headline, didn’t watch the video. I can tell you right now, no is the answer. If Christ is truly the King of kings, men need to only obey. Women as well. Women who scandalize our existence by dressing like corvettes are in grave sin. Men who look, are in the same boat. Purity is not hard, if you put Christ in His proper perspective. We owe Him nothing, except everything.
Matthew 19:26 NIV Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” You are correct. With God things are possible. For us it is impossible. The question then becomes is God with you?
@@t-06 huh, what? What do you not understand?
I think it is possible, from an artistic perspective. Generally however, lust creeps up when you naturally find the body attractive. I like the Catholic idea of “give the second look to God”… when your gaze locks on an attractive person, look up. The first look isn’t wrong, but beyond…
I am Christian man and have married to a gorgeous, wonderful, faithful woman for over 34 years. I am still trying to fight a lifelong battle with lust/porn and masturbation. I confess, that since I have damaged myself with what i have feasted my eyes and mind on all these decades, that I cannot look at an attractive woman and not give into lustful thoughts. Heck, I cant even be in church and be near an attractive female without having tempting imaginations. Its so bad I even envy the man that might be her husband and how good the sex is between them. Terrible thoughts. I have so many warped feelings about sex and sexuality. Sex is such a burden to me now. I get almost paralyzed in the presence of a really attractive woman/ great figure. Someone please pray for me to starve my eyes. I beg anybody who reads this...stop looking at porn TODAY. Stop looking at impure and titillating videos here on Y.T. STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable. Keep fighting the good fight, brother! This video might help: th-cam.com/video/vx_iMIqQPL4/w-d-xo.html
Absolutely
Absolutely, god doesn’t see us with lust.
Excellent
Thanks for watching!!