HOW TO BECOME A CONFIDENT WRITER | overcome insecurity & actually enjoy writing!
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 9 ก.ค. 2024
- RELATED VIDEOS:
→Self Care for Writers: • Self-Care Tips for Wri...
→Writing Lessons I Wish I'd Learned Sooner: • Writing Lessons I Wish...
→Why You Have no Motivation to Write: • Why You Have No Motiva...
→How to Create a Writing Process that Works for You: • How to Create a Writin...
→Dealing with Writer's Block & Low Motivation: • Dealing with Creative ...
→Writing for Yourself: • A Chat on Writing for ...
TIMESTAMPS:
0:00 - intro
1:20 - don't judge your work based on the most recent piece of feedback
3:30 - struggling doesn't mean you're a bad writer
5:28 - know your boundaries with feedback
7:16 - adapt your process to make you feel confide
8:32 - write stuff you love
9:53 - don't be mean to your own writing
11:44 - don't be afraid to be confident
12:29 - don't worry about being a 'good' writer
13:29 - redefine what 'good' writing is
14:53 - reframe insecurity/feedback objectively
→All my published work: linktr.ee/shaelinbishop
→If you want to support my channel, you can tip me on ko-fi! ko-fi.com/shaelinbishop
MY SHORT STORIES:
☾Tabula Rasa - The Temz Review: www.thetemzreview.com/fiction...
☾How to Slaughter - The Common: www.thecommononline.org/how-t...
☾After Hours - Vagabond City Lit: vagabondcitylit.com/2022/04/1...
☾Daughter of a King - Vagabond City Lit: vagabondcitylit.com/2022/03/2...
☾Cherry and Jane in the Garden of Eden - The Puritan: ex-puritan.ca/cherry-and-jane...
☾Zugzwang - Plenitude: plenitudemagazine.ca/zugzwang/
☾Elise Holding a Deer Mouse, 1829 - CAROUSEL: carouselmagazine.ca/c45-bishop/
☾I Will Never Tell You This - The Puritan: ex-puritan.ca/never-tell-you-...
☾Solarium - Minola Review: www.minolareview.com/shaelin-b...
☾Barefoot - The Fiddlehead [print only]: thefiddlehead.ca/issue/282
☾Wishbone - PRISM international [print only]: prismmagazine.ca/2020/04/19/pr...
☾Wishbone - video reading: vimeo.com/420052282
☾Hold Me Under Till I See the Light - The New Quarterly: tnq.ca/story/hold-me-under-ti...
☾Beautiful Animal - Room: roommagazine.com/issues/twine
☾How You'll Feel After the War - PRISM international: prismmagazine.ca/2021/10/20/pr...
FAQS
→How old are you? - 26
→How long have you been writing? - Since I was 8
→Where do you live? - I keep that private for safety reasons, but I grew up in Vancouver.
→Where did you go to university and what did you study? - I keep my university information private, but I majored in writing with a concentration in fiction.
→What are your pronouns? - They/them or she/her
→Where can I read your books? - None of my books are published yet, but you can read my published short fiction in my linktree (linked above!)
→So when will your book be published? - I don’t know! I’m in the revision process right now, but I can’t predict exactly when I’ll have a book published. But I’m working on it!
→Do you plan to traditionally publish or self publish? - Traditionally publish
→Will you read my book/story/chapter/mentor me? - Unfortunately I cannot accommodate these requests because editing/critiquing is a labour intensive task that I can’t afford to do for free alongside my job, my own writing, and running this platform. If you would like to hire me for paid editing work, contact me privately on twitter or instagram.
MORE WRITING TIPS: • Writing Tips
WRITING VLOGS: • Writing Vlogs
WRITING CHATS & DISCUSSIONS: • Writing & Authortube D...
BOOK REVIEWS: • Recent Reads
Check out more writing and publishing videos from me over @Reedsy!: / @reedsy
OUTRO MUSIC: "l u v t e a [acoustic]" by Autumn Keys
SOCIAL
Twitter: / shaelinbishop
Instagram: / shaelinbishop
Goodreads: / shaelin-bishop
"actually define what makes good writing to you" and "write for enjoyment" are two of the most helpful tips I've ever gotten! Brb making a check list
Every word you say about writing craft and just life is general is like gold. You’ve been more helpful to me than I can possibly say.
Exactly this. I wouldn't be anywhere near where I am today without Shaelin's content, like I legit would be years behind in my writing development.
whenever you post videos like this, i just KNOW you are saving so many writers from wallowing in their terrible writing slumps (including myself)! i have this awful reflex of not trusting myself when i’m enjoying my work. i’ll be like “wow i love what im writing rn… something must be wrong-i just dont know it yet” 😭😭 it’s so bad and every day is a process of reminding myself that my writing is good so long as it’s fulfilling me in the moment
I think I'd tie the 'more experienced writer struggles more' idea with the 'knowing what you know and don't know' concept - I think experienced writers struggle more because they know what they should do but fail to do so because they have such specific targets in mind. A more unexperienced writer might go for broader goals, 'enjoyable story' or 'good' which might be more easily satisfied than the goal of 'strong depressive mood' or 'this scene has a dual purpose, so I want to have multiple layers, some of which will be revealed later in scene x and y - how can I do that without being too overt'. So the struggle comes from knowing what you want to achieve but not having the tools or the method in mind yet.
SO true !! I definitely experienced a big drop of confidence as I was transitioning between beginner/intermediate stages as a writer and again from intermediate to more advanced for this exact reason
Mine is not doomscrolling on author/writing Instagram especially before a writing session. Setting boundaries with social media. The comparison kills my confidence!
I've been struggling so much with confidence ever since I took a creative writing class in my first year of uni (3 years ago and it's still haunting me lol), because I'd been writing my whole life and had no reason to think I was bad at it, until I actually had this space where I had to expose my writing to people I didn't know and didn't trust, and suddenly I was comparing myself to everyone around me, and also getting some really harsh feedback from classmates who also had no experience on how to give feedback on someone's writing. It affected me a lot, and I actually haven't written anything since finishing that class.
Now my problem is that I'm thinking of how much experience I *should've* gained in the last 2 years if I had continued writing, so I'm almost comparing myself to a hypothetical version of myself that is hypothetically better than I am, while also comparing myself to other people... I'm almost scared of my *own* feedback and opinions if I did try to write again. It makes me really sad, writing was the most important thing in my life for 18 years but I think my insecurities are pushing me to let go of it entirely. I'm almost getting desperate to try again now because I feel like if I let it go for any longer I won't ever get it back again. Which is why I've been watching your videos a lot more often again, they've been helping me build up the motivation to try again. So thanks for this video! This is exactly what I needed to hear, I think.
I find Neil Gaiman's advice is very encouraging also, in case you don't already know that.
CBT is the gold standard for therapy for a reason. it's really insane how much your mindset/mentality has an effect on your confidence in anything but especially on your craft.
I like the Stages of Competence as a way to look at getting discouraged about my writing. Broadly interpreted, for a while you'll feel like your work is worse and your struggles are worsening as you become a more competent writer because you become more consciously aware of your own struggles
Thanks for this. I recently submitted some work of mine to a writers group and couple people felt the need to give rather harsh criticism. Honestly, it really affected me. I wasn't able to write again for like three weeks
Listening to this has made me believe that I can actually cope and evolve through hate speech with my work. Thank you
editing as i wrote and multiple writings at once sounds so good
Great video!
About self deprecating comments authors make on their own work... It is something I can't stand. These comments give me really bad vibes. If someone says their work is bad, why do they put it online? So as to give people bad things to read? Is that their intention? I guess no. But if not, then why do they do it?
Don't be afraid to look confident, even if some people perceive it as arrogance. Many prefere arrogance over being fake anyway. I prefere an arrogant, yet honest person, any time!
This is pure gold. 1000 carat, pure gold atoms with no impurities. You couldn't even tell where on earth it was mined, it is this pure. It's the chemical ideal of gold. A platonic gold. Sparkly.
I do think you´re videos are helping people. I actually have a lot to say, but I lost my power to write. I used to write a lot, since I was nine years old, but mental illness has destroyed part of my mind, so I am not good at dealing with text anymore. It is natural as it is a way to survive, to focus on more basic, important, cave people things, but troublesome as it is frustrating because I really need to tell these things to the common mind of experience, as in being part of canon(s). But a´nough 'bout me. What a constructive world you have built here. The comment section is beautifully sympathetic, as far as I've seen, and you are absolutly brilliant, brave and unique. My farthest wishes of your continued prospering as to of writing, life and well being. Best Regards
I don’t think I will ever need a self help guru ever again. You are abundantly cool 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉❤😊
Writing for enjoyment and focusing on projects you love is a HUGE. Great video as always ✌️
I'm a decent way through one of my creative writing projects and I wanted to see you guys' reaction to my work:
After I finished my prayers, I walked to the Martyrs’ Memorial; since I last visited, there were more names, which I assumed were by the German refugees. The memorial had three obelisks, each of them made of marble, similar but not the same. The oldest one was starved of the vibrancy the others had but it was still more beautiful, the faint grey veins in the stone curved like the penultimate struggles of a wave in its futile battle against the shore. My eyes glided over all the names, the reminder of the lives lost and will continue to be lost to authority’s almost endless conquest for more, and I stopped on the oldest names written in Bangla, running my hand over them, I found two names, deeply engraved, the anger, the grief, tangible in their impact on the near-perfect obelisk it surrounds; my mother and my father, killed by the Fascists, in a country they didn’t belong in. I saw myself twenty years ago, carving with an old and weathered knife, surviving almost four decades before finding itself carving the names of its long-time wielders, all the emotions, raw and palpable, at the hands of a tool. My Sutu-Mamma, still mourning his older sister, his compass, stood next to me, feeling what I felt with the exact amount of power I had: nothing. I should’ve told him something, anything really, but I didn’t, I stood there, dealing with all my unprocessed emotions through the sharp edge of a knife and I dealt with its consequences as with all I’ve done. I prayed for them, and I prayed that the third obelisk remains clear of names, of martyrs, its flawless, save for the mineral impurities that make the marble’s most significant feature, surface standing as a reminder that peace and freedom are not vague allusions but a promise and something to be achieved.
This hits hard and close to home. I hope to one day reach your level of confidence.
Everyone has a right to their feedback but that doesn't mean you have to agree with it. Usually when I lose confidence when writing my book is I don't have enough knowledge of the topic I'm writing about. For example, I am writing about a character that has a disorder but it's a rare disorder and there isn't much research out there on the internet. Plus there is really no medical treatment for it. It's more an emotional treatment. Another reason I don't have confidence is I can picture the story in my head but can't translate it to text form. Great video. You give good advice.
This is a great video. There is deep wisdom for writing that is equally applicable to other endeavors. I would propose one addition: Make sure you are *putting in the practice/craft work* along side all this attitudinal fitness work. Grammar, syntax, punctuation, pacing, characterization, story elements and arc, etc. Dive deeply into your genre and your process. Edit closely and without mercy, revise with application and vigor, and yes, respond openly and efficiently to productive critiques. All of that is *work*, certainly, but I believe it is often a necessary support for the beneficial psychological and emotional structure you sketch here.
When I was a first year student in a very demanding academic program, I asked an older (graduating) student the secret to success. “Know everything and be confident,” he replied. At first I was a bit put off. But when I considered it later, I understood. To translate in this context: Make yourself the best writer you can be, then trust yourself.
great advice! would you ever do a video on retrospective or non-linear narratives? struggling a lot with those aspects of my novel at the moment
This is a really good idea!
Rock climbing rocks.
Fuck, I hate myself.
But it does, though.
You're so right tho it really does
Man I wish I had this level of self awareness and wisdom at your age. I still don't lol. Thank you so much for being brave and on the internet. It's a cruel place but I appreciate it. Idk where I'd be in my writing journey without your channel ❤
This is an excellent video! It’s so hard not to judge your writing once you send it to beta readers/critique partners based on the feedback from one or two people. So much of this is such wonderful advice. Thank you! 💜
I write TV drama pilots, novellas, novels, and short stories. Recently I was talking to the showrunner that I know who has created and showrun several popular children’s TV series. He was talking about how he was struggling with writing and I just found it reassuring that someone as successful as him struggles with writing and creating and it’s not just me as an emerging writer. It gave me a lot of perspective!
❤ Your channel.
Only Discovered it a few weeks ago but everything I’ve watched thus far has felt like a treasure trove of tried and tested methods and approaches. I appreciate that you’re always clear when it comes to methods you’ve had suggested in the past but just didn’t work for you.
If you’re taking requests for future topics to cover, might you be willing to go over what to expect of an editor?
Along with the fears of writing and criticisms we expect from others, knowing how an editor is going to view and process your work is probably just as significant, if not more.
existing online as a writer/creative is constant war. Shae you are braver than the troops.
As a hobby writer and a comic artist, I find this incredibly valuable. When you draw you think so much about the outcome that you don't even start because “I don't have the level,” but hey, if you don't try you'll never know. Thank you so much.
All your videos feel like a much needed therapy session
My two cents:
- participate/join the local writers group. They are everywhere. Do it. Everyone that shows is also an introvert and writes.
- join or form a critique group. It pushes you as a writer and makes you more comfortable with sharing both your good and bad writing, and it makes you more comfortable with criticism. Plus, it will make your writing better.
- publish. Take your writing to completion and submit submit submit!
These are really excellent tips. I’ll definitely be implementing some of these shifts in mindset to help me look at my work more objectively. Thank you!
Believe it or not, it’s taken me years to realize I had to write what I love and not write for a hypothetical audience.
THIS IS ONE OF YOUR BEST VIDEOS! GO SHAELIN!!! 🎉🎉 LOVED IT!!!
PS: I love your writing!❤
Excellent video - very brave use of personal revelation given in order to help the rest of us. Thanks!
I must admit, I'm very wary of videos like these due to constantly having to figure things out by myself from a young age (and not just in writing). I have this mindset of "I don't need these videos because I've already figured it out by myself and I don't need anyone's help" and that's just... wrong. Just in general. There's no stopping learning; a fact I pride myself on accepting and embracing. I am *constantly* trying to learn, even if it's information that is practically worthless to me. But I've been refusing to learn more about writing, and now I'm realizing that it's partly because of how insecure I was/am in my writing knowledge. I think it was just a matter of finding a fellow writer and creator that I liked and who resonated with me, who I could listen to without getting to defensive when there was no need to be. And I think I've found them
Thoughtful feedback from people who really care about you. Powerful.
Good tips for our local writers club! Thank you.
Thank you very much, I'll be giving a course for teens in summer at a summer academy. It's about writing (songs and) lyrics, however I think that these problems are for writers of lyrics, too. Basically, any writer runs into these sorts of struggles I guess, so I might propose this video for them to watch and debate. Kind regards. Thomas
Great video, Shaelin! I'm researching marketing tactics as a indie author and I keep hearing this idea that I need to write to a metaphorical reader and not for myself and I hate that idea!
I hear that tip a lot as well (since I work in the indie publishing sphere) and though I understand it from the marketing side, in terms of writing with this idea in mind, I agree that it's not for me and certainly not for everyone! Personally it goes against my own values so it's definitely not something I implement
@@ShaelinWrites I completely agree. It feels dishonest and that it would take the joy out of writing.
I love this advice! You said ✨CBT Route✨
I really needed to hear this today! Thank you!
Inner security about skills is healthy. Also get feedback from a large variety of individuals.
Love the advice & lavender cards! 💜
Thank you for making all these videos and helping us
first! this is a topic that's definitely relevant to me and i'm really excited to watch :D
Thank you. I actually think I needed to hear a lot of this
This video was so helpful! Thank you 🙏
you're the best channel on writing i have ever stumbled upon, i am so thankful for every video of you that i have watched. thank you so much for all your work and videos, shaelin
Great advice all around!
As another climber it’s funny too because I treat figuring out climbing beta as something fun and a game but my mindset is so different when it comes to writing because I expect so much more of my brain than my body.
Honestly your fit slays
I love your videos Shaelin!
This advice was super helpful 🙌
I needed this, thank you! And saved this to a playlist so I can revisit it regularly. Thanks for all you do! :)
ty for this amazing video.
Every single advise is very helpful.
Thanks! I'm inspired. 😊
The way I’m at 4 minutes, holding Steven kings “to write” that I’m annotating for school, and just got to the part where he talks about not being able to write Carrie then, that way, and for the reasons he had to at the time
Great tips! Thanks for sharing.
Yay! Another person who applies rocking climbing experiences to writing metaphors!
Prepare for so many more climbing metaphors bc I am really in my Climbing Era right now
@@ShaelinWrites Yesss! I almost always use climbing as an example for everyday life lessons about patience, overcoming fear, realizing your true capabilities, how to communicate better, and how to be humble. Welcome to the rocks! We have rope, carabiners, and metaphors galore!
You are a beautiful person. I love this channel. Thank you for this video. I’m now much more motivated to write
This is just gernerally really good life advice!
😂😂 the beginning tho so excited to watch this
I suppose my lack of confidence comes from the fear of becoming that person who thinks that their work is god tier when in reality, it objectively sucks. I am trying to tame the inner critic but my mind still gets me to think “but what if the inner critic is actually right?” From all the discussions I hear surrounding the inner critic, the impression I get is that that critic is always wrong and should be ignored. To which I say “is it? Should it? What if you’re ignoring it because it’s telling you something you don’t want to hear and thus make you ponder over whether you’ve wasted years doing all this. What if the harsh criticism/reality check is something you desperately need?”. I think “what if that story you’ve got inside you actually does deserve to just stay inside you after all?”
Some fears I have regarding writing too include becoming successful not because the writing is good but because the writing is so bad that it becomes successful or for being successful because your writing style is bashed a lot (“Better love story than Twilight)”. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if at one point Meyer had thought “God, I wish I never wrote those books”.
Wise words
Martin Eden by Jack London is a semi autobiographical work that explains very well how to become an author. I wrote my first piece of fiction that didn't make me want to drown myself following that advice 😁
It's quite ironic, actually.
Yeah, if you are naturally very smart and then put yourself down to be socially acceptable
Overcoming insecurity for most writers -- is really hard...
Thanks, Shaelin. Nice earrings.
Cool looking video.
Existing online is fraught with dangers indeed.
I did disagree about waiting for criticism until you are inwardly more confident. See below ... Join a group and share your work. They have all been where you are in your journey. Trust me on this. And with that ...
My three cents:
- participate/join the local writers group. They are everywhere. Do it. Everyone that shows is also an introvert and writes.
- join or form a critique group. It pushes you as a writer and makes you more comfortable with sharing both your good and bad writing, and it makes you more comfortable with criticism. Plus, it will make your writing better.
- publish. Take your writing to completion and submit submit submit!
What if I went and read reviews of writers, maybe I would face the fear of realistic critiques compared to a review which is a projection of a person's personal bias?
This is seriously wonderful advice. Thank you for this. I always love your thoughts and your transparency. This video came at just the right time for me, too. Thank you 🤗
We know what to do when we are thirsty, hungry, sleepy. But how do we deal with a massive blow to our confidence and self-esteem ?
General de Gaulle described being a prisoner of war after the defeat at Verdun as a blow to the soul. The key to self-confidence is preparation.
Support & sound advice are essential too. *The 700 year old writing secret. Thisness.* TH-cam. *The Oxford Writer.* (Thisness = Haecceity.)
I don't feel or think my writing is bad.
I know it. Which is why looks up tips. Why else would I be here?
👍🏻
Yep, and for being a woman and confident
hypothetical reader is happening to me now and I don't even like the hypothetical reader because it is a dead space. Not a life or anything alive engaging with what i created
Im writing about a dystopian city after a girls father tried to raise her mother from the dead. She is inlove with the dead, she is a psychopath in a way, she finds her happiness in the blood and death and quietness of the planet.
She meets with a group that wants to murder her dad for what he did, she has to find a way to stop them before reaching his office.
I don’t know if I should abandon it because i dont want to spend time on a book that won’t get any attention
'only getting feedback from people you have trusting relationships with', me sending my girlfriend the first chapter of my book and her answer being 'not too shabby' 🤡
Anyone want to form a writing/critique group? I write YA Scifi and Fantasy and would love to actually be part of a community 😂
Aman Gorgeous
Pls say slowly 😮
I wouldn't agree with how beta readers are toxic...they give very straight forward feedback and without them I wouldn't have realised I was a shit writer and changed, saving lots of time. Getting feedback that just steps around politely is good sometimes, especially for very young authors (like young teens) or completely new authors who you don't want to discourage. But if it's an adult who is a shit writer you have to be straight forward about the problems or the improvement will take longer and they'll just regret it.
It definitely depends on the person’s personal experience! There are for sure great beta readers out there and Ifor sure didn’t mean to imply all beta readers are toxic, just that for me personally it was a toxic experience, and so personally isn’t the way I like to get feedback. For many people it works though! My point was just to get feedback in the way that is healthiest for you, but for me that isn’t beta reading, so I use other methods
I’ll also add that I definetly didn’t mean that one should seek feedback that isn’t direct or sugar coats the feedback - I get very detailed and direct feedback from my workshop/critique partners (how I like to get feedback) that is, in my experience, much more thorough than I got from beta readers and helped me improve much more. However it depends so much on what works for the person, as well as the specific people giving them feedback. I am lucky to have an incredible workshop group, but other people luck out and find fantastic beta readers. I think there’s a huge difference between direct and helpful feedback, and being mean or rude, and unfortunately with beta readers I had more of the later, and so the feedback was both mean spirited and unhelpful, so now I opt for other methods where I get both better, deeper, more engaged feedback, and in a more respectful and objective environment. I just shared the anecdote about my negative beta reading experience to show an example of pivoting away from a method of feedback that was unhealthy for me, to show that it’s okay and important to find methods of getting feedback that are healthy for you and to remove yourself from unhealthy critiquing situations. But I definetly didn’t share that anecdote to make the point that beta reading is always toxic - it was just to give an example of how I personally found healthier ways to getting feedback! If beta reading works for you, you should definitely keep with it
I’m 15 seconds into video and the person telling me to be confident seems very unconfident
You look very beautiful Shaelin.
Does it hurt to talk with all that vocal fry?
Self-help guru?? Shaelin, you're less of a placebo and more of a postmaster. "This card came from your cousin in Wisconsin. There's money in the envelope. Happy Confidence Day."
I often forget to have boundaries on feedback. It might be that I just like people and pursue meaningful discussions ... letdowns often happen.
Shit talkers are everywhere.
12:00 "But as soon as I existed online, I learned very quickly that any form of confidence or even just excitement would be perceived as arrogance." The official motto of the Discord app.
Your prompt to redefine "good" is especially helpful. The common roadblock in getting work accepted (at least in my experience) is that craft is a low priority for the people in charge. Their highest priority is their own idea of what type of story is a good story ... based on their imaginary audience. They consider what they want to be what everyone else wants. I have almost succeeded a few times in teaching these theatre producers that they don't actually know what they want; they instead want what they know. And then their attention span slips, giving them the excuse to put me back at square one. My mental health has been better lately, but I'm still dealing with these same people. My work gets better. Their standards stay the same.