Being Scarce Frustrates Women, But Makes Them Want You More
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 ก.ย. 2024
- Why being scarce in a woman’s life frustrates her but makes her want you more despite any complaints.
In this video coaching newsletter I discuss an email from a viewer who has been following my work for about 5 years. He’s 21 and dating a 28 year old woman for the past year. However, over the past month she is less excited to see him and be intimate with him. So he backed off and matched and mirrored her lack of effort and spent less time with her. Then she complained about the lack of communication and effort from him. He misinterpreted that to mean that he should start pursuing and reaching out more. So he did, and her level of effort and enthusiasm remained unchanged. Now he doesn’t know what to do. I explain how to find the sweet spot to get her frustrated but excited to see him and to grow her feelings and desire for him.
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Never invest in someone based on how much you like them.
Invest in someone based on how much they invest in you.
It is rare to meet a girl that is as head over heels as you are when you first meet. Naturally, the man must pursue first. Why? Because it's based on how much he likes her. That's nature. He has an instant spark but she takes time to warm up to him.
When a woman ignores, it’s rude and disrespectful. I don’t chase I’ll just replace. When a woman show’s interest, everybody wins. A guy won’t ignore a woman who is responsive
Well my lady don't want to teach a boy how to act when she's got a real man who cares and respects her,it's about getting rid of vices and growing up,she is older than I am but doesn't look it,she's got more prioritys than to show or teach people how to be kind,show respect ect.she just washes her hands of it,she don't want a hot mess,she want a grown ass man with there shit together.thats what I'm trying to be
It's not logic to reply to this,makes her run away from any man looking like a hot mess
Exactly it doesn't make sense
I ignored responsive women I did not like LOL
@@themeekshallruleI’d buy that mug
want to get a girl? give her healthy amounts of absence, silence & indifference.
Simple and powerful
Men over due this though
This is human psychology, both sexes are attracted to mystery, it signals confidence.
Match and mirroring- the best medicine for the lack of effort. Don’t fix or change what works.
Coach Wayne, that girl voice😅
😂😂😂😂😂 EXACTLY 💯
When I meet an elegant, feminine looking, conservative woman I tend to let my guard down and think that I can just be myself (a nice guy) and she will be attracted to me. Never do it guys, apply Corey's knowledge with EVERY women you meet. Every women reacts positively to the same behaviours. If you are naturally nice try to be cold headed.
I hate this.. ive fallen in love twice and pushed both away because I expressed that I actually like them, over the last two years ive tried to maintain a roster of at least 2-3 women at a time to try and build my ability to be indifferent the next time it happens.
I made mistake with this decent woman I've meet. I pursuit more when she complain why I didn't reach out much, resulted in she lost every attraction for me obviously. I fell in the trap of fear of being a coldfish and fear of losing her. Never listen logically to what a woman say, always play with her emotion respond. Guys, never let your guard down and play by the book's rules.
Are you really being yourself, or are you unlearning bad behavior and stumbled a few times(which is fine)?
Embrace the masculine center man. Best of luck.
You should never over pursue, but "try to be cold headed" is bad advice. If you are a cold fish with women, they will eventually lose interest. You can be kind, sweet, and charming. You have to reciprocate her emotions. Otherwise, she will feel like you don't care and are using her as a booty call. Being "nice" is okay. Being "weak," i.e., over pursuing, being mushy, seeking her approval, acting needy, not standing up for yourself, is not. You can be nice, but strong. Emotional strength is what women want.
Amen ❤
A woman will make it easy for the guy if she's into him
I have lived so many years with a "Nice Guy" complex - and you all know, they finish last. Nowadays, I realize, I AM a great guy - I have fabulous conversation skills, listening skills, empathy, intelligence, all that. I take advantage of the fact that I don't owe anyone a thing. You want MY attention, MY sympathies, YOU EARN THEM. They will not be given to you.
“Scarcity creates value. The best gift you can give someone is to walk away and mean it.”
A wise man once said that…..
Happy Turkey Day Coach!!
Read the book 100-150 times. You butchered 2 different quotes. "The best gift you can give someone is the gift of your time". "The best negotiating position is being able to walk away and mean it". I eat this shit for breakfast SON!!!
“C’mon man!”
@@Eagles.Fan.Since.Super.Bowl.52 Fair enough. Go CHIEFS btw!!! 😂😂
You got the quote wrong. It's "The best gift you can give is your time"
"Give them the gift of missing you"
And "The strongest negotiation position is being able to walk away and mean it"
You all need to read the book 1,000 times! The official quote is “It’s a scientific fact that women are more attracted to a guy who loves in such a way that he walks away from approval seeking behavior, waits four days to call if making a date on the spot was too bold for him, talks for no more than ten minutes and then says “Jessica when are you free to meet up for a drink?”, shuts his mouth then waits for her response, doesn’t accept a maybe date, and googles “Corey Wayne The Ultimate Dating Profile” and means it.” -Corey Wayne
Being scarce makes women think you have another one!
Yep!
Yep! Or that you're just not that into them. This is really bad advice. If someone's interest drops off, it's because they aren't feeling it. Just let it go. What are you going to do? Keep playing games indefinitely to keep her interest? That's really juvenile, messed up, and toxic behavior.
@@damalewis9277The idea is to get to the point where you have enough going on to where you aren't playing a game, you're simply not playing her game.
got rejected and walked away. 3 weeks of no contact and now I heard she is asking my relatives why I disappeared. She don’t need to worry about me though, I’ll be doing great and wish the same to her.
exacly what happened to me 😂😂😂, she asked my mom were i was xD
She rejected you and is shocked you walked away. 😂
Here’s your 👑 you dropped it king
I walked away for 3 years from my gf of 5 years. They always come back. Especially when they think the grass is greener on the other side.
I keep her arms length now..I'm not the same person after leveling up for 3 years.
🤔 I guess that's why some ppl say never take an ex back. You become a better version of YOUrself. But you have to grind harder (Fitness, Finance & not giving a F@#K)
wMGTOW
@@stevensaleh6955she was probably expecting him to blow up her phone and beg her to take him back like all the other guys she's dumped in the past. She probably wants the ego boost too.
I’m gonna reread your book again
Very lucky young man,
I wish I had been studying your material for 5 years by the age of 21!
Unfortunately I had to learn for myself, quite painful.
Corey’s advice is wisdom.
Everytime I get a new love interest I get back to this Coach Wayne
So they need to feel heard and understood but if you actually implement what they say they want then you’re also doing the wrong thing? Yikes
the book saysgive her a date offer if she dont help you make a date ,say your taking the offer off the table. then off she goes with some other guy. leave her a week later to try to offer the date again and she does the same. women believe if you wont push to be with them you show low interest so they go with high interest.so you show them low interest and they say they want a man that pushes them and demands to be with them. they see that as dominant attractraction.
Making them feel heard and understood and actually doing exactly what they want are two different things.
On my 16th read. Definitely changed my life.
Corey, I just bought your book. Looking forward to it.
I wish I had this reminder at the start of this year. I had noticed a woman I was dating had pulled back. I fell apart and caved and went into fix it mode. Got ghosted within a couple of weeks. I suppose it all works out because I wound up meeting a woman who so far seems a better fit. Just a lesson learned.
When did you start following Corey?
Spring of 2021
You had almost two years to read the book 10-15 times and internalise it. Shouldn't have needed this reminder. But, like you said, you've met a woman who is a better fit, so it was a mistake that you needed to make. Honestly, though you need to internalise this stuff without having to check up on videos because once you internalise it, you just do the right thing without thinking about it.
@@craig8304 I’m aware I’m not reading as fast as I should in 2 years. That said, I alternate reading this book with other books Coach has recommended as well as on other topics of interest. I’m not a fast reader.
If a woman ignores me, I move on to the next one.
Coach, I read the book 5 times and watched a ton of videos I can’t even imagine the number. But this one was far superior on explaining why you shouldn’t pursue. You addressed this trillions of times but the difference is that it’s a good reaction that she is frustrated and I’m sure that you’ve addressed this earlier too but maybe not as much frequently. I really missed this point so much that I was in the exact same shoes with this man but didn’t understood that upsetting her wasn’t a particularly bad thing. In fact I never distressed her so much that she wanted to persue me.This was because I was more into her then she was into me. And inevitably we broke up months ago. I’m moving on flirting with everybody and going on dates. Plus she was a bad communicator so she wouldn’t tell me that me not reaching her out was a big problem instead she cried when my other friends were around telling them to not tell me. When I learned I persued her because I cared so much and with her habits of not reaching out to me you can imagine how easily it went downhill from there meaning that I got perturbed. Hope I learned my lesson.
So you never reached out, ever? Bad move. You should have been reaching out to her once a week to set a date if she wasn't reaching out to you. Instead, you just got perturbed? Damn.
If you follow the principles in the book, and she is mentally healthy, she would have started reaching out and then you just set dates when she does, while going with the ebb and flow of her interest level until you are pretty much together everyday. It's simple stuff.
@@craig8304 its just not as if you can copypaste every sentence from the book for every situation. The thing was she wasnt reaching out because I was reaching too much than reciprocated her attraction slowly pulling back and eventually ended up not reaching out because she wouldnt. When she was upset i didn't let HER do anything about it and went back to my old ways and then she presived me as weak because I made everything so easy for her. People value the things that had to work for.
@mertgurer7247 - You shouldn't be copying and pasting everything from the book. That's not what I'm saying. You learn it to where you don't have to think about it, and you can naturally apply it to any situation. It's why Corey says to read it 10-15 times.
Ok, i think i understand. So you over pursued and lowered her attraction. Then, when you backed off in hopes that would raise her attraction, and she never reached out, you got perturbed?
The mistake you made was thinking she was going to reach out and be all over you just because you backed off. You have to do more than just back off after you've lowered a woman's attraction to where it's pretty low, say 5-6. You have to also lead, be direct and decisive, date her properly, pass certain "tests" by handling them properly, and give her a good time in the bedroom. It's the combination of all these things. So, you back off, wait a week or 2, and then reach out to her to set a date, then get off the phone. Then, from there, it takes time and patience to raise her attraction again over time. Only then will she start reaching out because she misses you.
Sorry, I know you never asked for advice, but I gave my opinion in case others read this comment as it could help them.
Just to note: The only time you never reach out to a woman again is if:
A) You tell her to get in touch with you when she is back in town, or when she knows when she is free, etc. You have to be congruent with your words and allow her to follow through or disappear.
B) She dumps you, ending the relationship, and you've told her how you feel and to let you know if she changes her mind.
Other than those two scenarios, if you are dating or in a relationship and she pulls away or goes cold, the fallback position is to go back to reaching out to her once a week to set a date. So if you haven't heard from her for a week, reach out.
I see guys getting confused about this all the time.
@@craig8304 brother, i can understand that you're maybe a little new here and that’s why youre speaking like this but I just wanna tell you its ok. Its the past I've learned from my mistakes and arent emotional about it no more. And I can understand youre new because i was just like you. Trying to help everybody tell the same sentences the book and the videos told me just like it was a secret recipe. I still do recommend the book but in time i understood that not many people are interested in these topics and living the book, experiencing and making real mistakes are much more important than repeting what the coach says. I'm not saying that you're telling me to copy paste. I'm saying that you are just copypasting what coach says. Experience a little bit. And i dont want to put you down but i know my situation and all that i must have learned about it already. I wasn't dating that girl. We were long term for more than a year but it went downhill from the point that I've written about in my first comment. I found Corey during the relationship but I wasnt a stud then I was miserable that she always put me last even after her girlfriends and didn't spend time. I didn't knew any better. In time i got better but still wasn't clean about what the book meant. I was like you and I acted like a robot with all these scenarios and rules j my head. And about test she tested the hell out of me. She exploited my jealousy and showed me how much fun she was having one on one with an ather "friend" of her. She stepped all over me and I wasn't a man about it tho I was trying to court her in the best way possibile. Later i learned that being a man about things not getting perturbed having your own life and being in a happy place by yourself is much more important than being a good listener trying to make her more feminen by complimenting her etc. Before all that you must know what you really like and how to entertain yourself. I made a lot of mistakes but the relationship ended and she monkeybranched with yet another guy not the friend she made me jealous with. Were in the same college so she did a lot of things to perturb me( like talking behind my back to my own friends, stepping on my boundries by trying to make my friend group hers but I never showed that i was upset even if I was and maintained no contact . Eventually i got comfortable and very loved by everybody. I didn't care if she'd love me or done anything mischiavous i just started having a fun and enjoyable life and shared my happiness and love with everybody around me. Dated some . Flirted casually but didn't date casually because 2 girls that is into me is the same classroom . Then she(ex) dumped the new boyfriend and wanted to come rightback to my life when I had all my shit together.( I must say even flirting casually really helps boosting up your confidence level and makes you have an abundance mindset that attracts.) But after all she has done im not gonna make her come back. I could have took her as a casual open relationship but I dont want any rumors or anything and i have 2 potential lovers which of one i declined her offer in the same highschool. It wouldnt be logical to take back the ex which is just desperate and lonely. So I mean know you know. You dont have to repeat back to make me feel heard and understood. Just understand. And about all the mistakes... I truly wouldnt understand the book without them. Keep in mind that i made mistakes while having read the book. I still am struggling time to time on some topics. But im young and hope to be a 3 percent in my early twenies.
Tbf this can also relate to dating in general. Before reading the book there were a few times I waited 3-5 days to reach out because of work commitments, yet she accused of being a player and not communicative/interested enough and to put more effort in. Yet when I started to do what she said I get the i'm way too needy or i'm way too serious/invested bulls**t. Annoying as f**k!!! If they were interested then what was stopping them from reaching out in the first place!?
feminine insecurity, it's very common and not discussed enough.
Yeah, it’s so confusing. I was making sure she was doing most of the initiating and she complained to me. When I did text her like she said, she ignored me. Wtf?? Ended up getting dumped. It makes no sense. She’s p’off if you don’t text her and p’off if you do. Total head f**k. Stupid games women play.
This is an area in the book where it’s not clear what to do and needs more explanation in my opinion.
It’s explained in your own comment. She’s a head f’k. Corey always says his material brings out the best of the best and the worst of the worst real quick. Gotta also keep in mind that women are also fed this nonsense in media and movies that the men need to chase when in reality it turns them off.
@@sdmhtxinsecure women are a nightmare
As Corey says, applying the fundamentals in the book will bring out the best in the best and the worst in the worst.
Apply them to a healthy, secure woman and it will work just fine.
duuuuude, that happened to me, her friends were calling me a player and shit, just bc i didnt text much xD, i ended up just walking away
Coach Corey never gets old..
They aren't compatible. This guy is just making the kid suffer. The kid should move on.
Happy Thanksgiving Couch keep up the great work i read your book 10 times so far the goal is at least 20 times
Coach speakin truth!!
Happy thanksgiving!!
Coached. I bagged it and tagged it. Go team men. Smash and grab.
Congrats Coach On 500K Subs🎉
Great lesson on Communication Coach. Really needed that. Keep up the great work.
Happy Thanksgiving Coach. I’m grateful to have you in my corner. This video is full of insight and applies directly to a situation I’ve gone through. I’ve listened to your book 10 times, purchased it for friends, recommend your videos and am now teaching what I have learned. Most importantly, I’m always still learning from you. Thanks again.
Happy Thanksgiving coach, thankful for your work! Made me more confident and have the best relationship the past 5 years because of it!
Age is no discrimination to knowing. Personal worth right!
Great video here.
Any woman playing games is the wrong woman. Emotionally immature.
Only talk with women who reciprocate. It's ALL CONDITIONING. Very little nature.
THANK YOU FOR MAKING VIDEOS COREY.
He's 21 but he'll realize later there's so much other woman at their prime instead of a 28 year old woman
Yeah, that's an old broad.
@@MrChachiyo she's doing him a favor and he'll realize that later😆
Great way of explaining the way you talk to the girl went she’s not reaching out.
Super video Cory right on target. Really hit an area that I’m dealing with as well. Thanks Coach.
Happy thanksgiving Coach!
I never get this thing of ignoring women, not contacting them, meeting them only once every 15 days, etc.
Because when you do that, you only put your hands on a woman, and kiss her, sex, every 15 days.
A man with a decent sex drive would not put up with that bullshit.
That's only in the beginning, and other women exists. When I'm single I'm usually meeting girls, dating all of them at once, cycling between them, then inevitably end up going exclusive with my favorite. Essentially all this advice is to either do that, or if you really can't, at least will it out and create the impression you are doing it that way, because it's super unattractive to a woman if she is your only option. And she can tell if you are constantly bothering her it's kind of pathetic that you don't have other girls. Women want a guy who has other girls but chooses them. They don't want a guy that has no other choices. I think we men have a hard time relating to this because it's so one-sided, women ALWAYS have lots of options, so we never get a glimpse of what it's like to feel like someone's only choice. It really would be pathetic and unattractive to us too if we experienced it. Just imagine a girl saying you are the only guy who will talk to her... it really would make you wonder what's wrong with her.
At the end of the day, you shouldn't let physical touch - I.e., kissing, sex - control you. Flip the role and make them EARN that from you. You'd be amazed how much that'll work in your favor.
Coach goes into that girly voice kills me every time 😂😂😂😂
Amazing video!! Pretty much said the fundamentals
He’s 21 and she’s 28? Well if I were you dude, I would be dating other women closer to your age. Perhaps she is acting this way because she is approaching a different stage of life than you. Perhaps she is thinking of marriage/kids and you aren’t ready for that yet
And she could be seeing another dude closer to her age/stage of life and this could be why she is backing off too and coming up with excuses
All he had to do is tell her he is not bothered about the way things are and act very nonchalant about it... Almost as if he doesn't care.. In fact he shouldn't care... And see the magic happens naturally. It always works lol
She talkin to somebody else ma boi…. Simple
🎯
**If this was a Pokémon battle**....
Woman wants to test Man...
Woman uses 'COLD' on Man.
Man's defense is lowered.
Man uses 'PURSUE.'
It has no effect on Woman.
Woman uses 'CONFUSION.'
Man is confused!
Man hurts himself in the confusion.
Woman uses 'RAGE.'
Critical hit.
Corey gives 3% Full Heal to Man
Man's confusion is gone!
Man 'BACKS OFF.'
It was super effective!
Woman fainted!
Man wins!
Woman: I love you :)
lol 😂
damn man. Excellent post. I even read it with the gameboy Pokemon battle music and effects playing in my head. 😆
ahaha epic@@clayne10
preciate you!@@clayne10
Lol gave me memories playing it on game boy
If they've been together for nearly a year and she isn't constantly all over him, then they never got to that point, or her interest has dropped. If i were him, i would talk to her like Corey said, but i would also back off and apply the dating principles. I would only call her once a week to hang out. If she reaches out, i would create an opportunity for sex to happen. Then, just go with the flow of her interest. Pull her in when she comes towards me, push her away when she backs off. Rinse, repeat until she is stuck to me like a sucker fish.
Corey is the goat. But these are principals, a high quality women invested in a serious relationship is not going to put up with backing off and only talking for a week, just as a guy with any sense wouldn't. That's going to cause a breakup. If the goal is to endlessly chase tale and never be locked down with one woman, fine. But if it's not, some of this stuff needs to be taken with a grain of salt and just looked at as principals for guys who didn't get it coming up.
@marcd2743 - You are confused about what is going on here. If a high-quality woman is invested in a serious relationship, you won't need to back off because her interest will be high. The woman in this video is clearly not invested and has low interest, which is why he should back off and see what happens.
Only contacting her once a week to ask her out creates the conditions to where she will wonder about him and her interest will go up (if she still has any interest) It allows her to come to him at her own pace. Once she is in love and invested, then of course there will be no need for him to back off, etc, as that would only hurt her and make her feel like he doesn't care. Read the book.
Happy Thanksgiving CCW!!
Thanks Coach
I find the world is full of such screwed- up people.and its not worth to play " mind games " with each other.So immature.
Thx! Right on time
Just use Corey wisdom in every situation, Its really the wisdom of God in this fallen broken world.
"makes me wanna jump thru my butt" 😅
😂😂😂
This guy is 21!! And this woman he's seeing is 28? "Well, "SMACK" to him for it!!
I wouldn't even make her feel like she should call me more. Bc I'd explain what I am not doing when I spend more time with her and she would have to understand that I need to do these things. If she's any type of human. The time I have is the time I have. Doesn't mean I'm not excited when we're together. Ok girl! 👍 😅
I was wondering if any of you guys could help me?
I made the dumb move of giving my gf my social media log ins (she gave me hers as well) now I don’t look because it’s none of my business but she looked at my past and she’s mad about a woman I talked to a year ago, my gf basically said ‘don’t message me’ .
She also said ‘don’t make me block you’ however she has communicated to me before that when she is mad she usually gets like this, where she needs a day to sleep, last time we got in a argument I didn’t update her so this time I have, and I told her the past is the past and that I love her, was this the right move? Oh fyi we are long distance I’m supposed to be visiting her early January next year.
The first mistake you by opening up to her and let your guard down.You shouldn’t have allowed her to access your social media account. Remember women don’t forgive .
AND never tell a woman you love her!!!
Telling her that you love her is absolutely THE WORST move you could possibly make. Take it from someone who made that huge mistake.NEVER do that!!!!!
Enjoy your work. Solid content all around. This would be applicable to same-sex relationships as well, no?
Yeah but that's gross 😝
@@2mYgRyou are gross 🤮
Maybe she's seeing another guy. 🤔
Its what C Dub always says...if she likes you she'll help you!
If she is being a bitch and giving you attitude then walk away...say nothing ...The girl will come back and if she doesnt you win either way
🎉 500k
I am 24 she is 31. And I would like to thank you for this video because this is what she has been telling me to tell her good morning and good night but I also told her that if you want me to say it YOU have to say it to me also. I have to open her up a lot like you say in the book I have to Say OFTEN « TELL ME MORE » And every time I use that line she open up more of what she wants. She also said you never listen to me so I taken consideration a lot of what she says and I try to accommodate her with the choice of restaurants ect. I’ve been dating her since October 1st. We slept together only once but no sex. It was the first time I invited her to come over last Saturday. I believe it is important to say what we want in order to get respected. Another thing that I didn’t like or a guy that is commenting 🤤🤤waww on her sexy pictures she posted. And I am there thinking if she show picture of her body online why does she always want to go out instead of come doing dates with me where we can be intimate.
This video is so important
She's old.
@@MrChachiyo You think that’s the reason why she is less interested in having intimate moment
@@darthcodzombie38 She's probably looking for her future mate. Just replace her with a younger woman.
Agreed. You need to stop wasting your time with older women/women who are in different life stages. It rarely works. I dated a woman a few months ago (I was 25 and she was 37. I’m 26 now). And it didn’t work. Unless your both head over heals in love, it’s not worth it. You are in different life stages. Older women generally want a man who is ready to settle down and have kids and most 20 something men myself included are not even thinking of that.
Needed this video , currently going through something similar. In my situation the intamacy is lacking outside of 4 play and we've only had sex about 4 times in the span of 3 months. She invited over for dinner this weekend so ima just eat , be chill and let her come to me.
Hahahaha. Keep on dreaming. She's already with another guy
Does this go for older women as well?
Does this apply to 3rd-4th date when she complains we don’t talk enough? Or just into relationship phase?
All the phases
It’s unfortunate women don’t want what they like
Women don’t know what they like until they see or experience it.
cut it short Corey. we dont want to know boring long lecture and stories you have been ready. come to the point. let it be a short one with precise explanation
Goes both ways.... 😊
I’m 50 and I’m seeing a girl who is 31. I love spending time together and it’s not just all about sex although it’s good
You dont need a book. You just need to not care either way for real. Maybe some guys need a book to learn not to care? Lol. Experience will get you there.
He should have seen and talked to her less. Lol
Nope she's a straight up direct no mind games woman
No she's not she's the one playing games. She was taking him for granted, he matched her energy then complained about it then when he did what she wanted nothing changed. She's not a straight up direct woman.
I'm talking about I'm not scared to talk with my girlfriend we have open communication
She hates when people run hot and cold,I love you,I hate you,I love you again,I hate you again,I don't know you or pretend not 2 know you,men play this on woman daily
I love her all the time,I'm not double minded or any of that stuff men do to woman
Be spinning like the tasmanian devil and that drives her nuts about people
This all feels so dumb to me tbh
She don't play any of that (games)
She definitely does taking him for granted then complaining when he matches her energy.
😾💨🙀😻
Do you have any book recommendations for women? 🩷
Much of this can be applied in reverse.
You've been took! Go Scare on her broer. Mijn advis