Hello you savages. Watch the full episode with Brett here - th-cam.com/video/v39se0OQyIs/w-d-xo.html Get a 20% discount on Nomatic's amazing luggage at nomatic.com/modernwisdom (use code MW20)
You should have scooped her up when she was single Chris… the chemistry between you two is clear thru the screen in EVERY in-person interaction Ive ever seen you two in
Notice the feminine approach here -- he asked the question how to find (or get) a good woman, and Brett went on to list the traits you need to acquire. This implies passivity that the right woman will land in your lap once you acquire certain traits. The masculine reality is that you need to go through the painful process of approaching, rejection, getting ghosted, setting up dates, carrying conversations with little to no engagement on her part.
@@Ziggyvu Because we men tyically don't notice women who make the effort. We only notice the ones who don't have to. Which is the problem when it comes to men as well.
It explains things most guys don’t think about. I also learned a lot from reading a book called Flirtosphere Seduction by Vexoner. The book helped me understand women better and feel more confident. Combining tips from videos like this and the book really made a difference for me.
Fake news. Spam. Click-bait. Whatever you want to call it, it's fucking trash, and it's a big part of why people hate the internet's attention-based economy.
Control what you can control guys. This means career and wellness and being consistently proactive about your overall wellbeing, physical and all. The right one may come along, they may not. But at least live a life in which you can truly be happy with yourself.
Good tips, but one key component is the man has to make the first move. Meaning, he has to approach the woman and talk to her. We’re hard wired this way. Woman that approach first are the exception to the rule. They generally wait for us to take the lead.
@@andrebaxter4023The issue is Women aren’t very good at signaling “Hey I like you” which can easily be signaled with making constant eye contact or maybe giving off body signals. It cannot be all on the man to guess which woman finds him attractive, women can definitely help by giving off a signal.
The reality is even with all the changes, women dont generally approach a guy even if they are interested. They put themselves in a place where they could be approached by a guy they might be interested in, and if you dont do something, then nothings going to happen.
I did ask two guys out and was kindly rejected. At least I know how hard it is. However when some guys got close to me and I already knew I didn't feel anything for them, since they were in my group of friends, I asked the other friends to open their eyes because I was feeling very unconfortable and thought that they would talk about those things. Every single time I was forced to sit with one of them or with the other one. And these other friends -all men- told me that women should help each other. In the end I had to stop going out with this group. I know these guys are now happily married with children and I am happy for them, but I feel the same about them. We had no connection, I felt no attraction at all. One of them was very fat. And it is not that I am a super model or that I wanted to date a supermodel but he did not take care of himself when he was young. I couldn't imagine how he would be when becoming a bit older. It is really hard to know when somebody you like likes you back or is just being polite; however, it is quite easy to know when somebody is after you and you do not particularly like that person. Love makes us blind.
@@anabegins7349I've never asked someone out, ive been thinking about doing it though, im currently 16 but my biggest dream has always been to have children of my own, i hope to have a kiddo by 21, i feel like im running out of time, hopefully all goes well
Women ignore me when I'm not even interested in them. When I'm in coffee shops/sauna/hiking/gym etc - women basically NEVER initiate any conversation first. I basically only speak to guys, they actually make effort to start conversations. I went on a hiking trip recently with 15 strangers and all the women ignored me until I spoke to them first. Women passivity is the same in dating, they expect me to do everything - approach, plan dates, keep in touch etc. They don't even give any signals of interest. Juice ain't worth the squeeze for entitled women. Guess I'll stay single.
Exactly. Why even bother when they treat us as invisible. There should be atleast some signs of interest from them for guys to feel motivated to initiate talk. If not, there's a good chance that the relationship won't last long.
@@carlwagner4565 seriously though, why do you think this is? Many people have said I'm good looking before and I'm 6'5. I almost know for a fact it's not my physical appearance. Is this just how it works? Women essentially ignore men? They can't even speak to us in a friendly manner?
Well, I'm sure there are many factors at play here. The first thing that I will say is the size difference. On average, men are larger than women, and they may find this intimidating and if they are intimidated, they are less likely to initiate a conversation. I saw that you mentioned your height and if that is true, then they may be intimidated by your size, regardless of your perceived looks. Secondly, I will mention the gendered differences. I know there is equality today and so on, but there is less of a 'burden of performance' in regard to women. They aren't expected to be assertive and start the conversation, which is seen as a masculine trait. So, they may have never learned to put themselves out there to initiate anything, especially with dating. They will wait for everyone to come to them first, because why not? They don't need to be the one who risks rejection and can be the submissive, docile one. My third and final point is about the social media world and how women and men trust each other less and less. The social media creators are talking about how the opposite sex can't be trusted and blah and blah. I'm sure there are more points, but those are the three that I thought of. TL;DR 1. Size Differences -> Intimidated -> Less Likely To Start A Conversation 2. Gendered Differences -> Women Aren't Expected To Be Initiators 3. Social Media -> General Distrust Of Opposite Sex
@@delete1805 nah.. that aint it.. it is pretty simple.. dude is average or maybe above average.. point is, even an average chick will get tons of dms in her instagtam so she doenst feel the need to "chase" after guys.. no incentive to start convos when extremely attractive dudes are already doing it.. that is it
So basically what she said you need to become the best version of yourself possible: become successful,fit,mentally-emotionally strong and in return you get a woman who doesn't do sh*t but she expected for you reach your pinnacle..
@@KorisnickoIme84 Basically confident without being cocky. Tons of Rizz & authenticity. I'm pretty old but your age doesn't even register with them when they recognize & gaze cuz they caught u cruising through their area.
well, what type of woman you end up being with is entirely up to you, isn’t it? have the self respect and don’t date women that don’t do sh*t. go for women that actually want to improve themselves, put in effort and strive to be their best too. you have women that don’t work on themselves at all expecting a prince, and you also have men that lay on their couch all day, don’t work on themselves and expect a princess because they’re “nice”. look at ask yourself honestly, and ask yourself “what do I deserve” and don’t settle for anything less.
@@nanofyurbiznes I have the wisdom now & sometime when I was younger I had the ability to see potential. Never gave the look @ the ones that were showered with attention. But the gals that were mentally there with a kind & soft spoken way about them caught my eye & still do to this day.
@@jacksonwilliams1262 low quality women don’t. there are good women out there, my friend. but remember that they also expect the same from you. keep working on yourself and don’t settle for someone who isn’t worth it.
so are Brett Cooper's expectations as well......otherwise she would have married an ice cream vendor.....she ain't gonna marry beneath her means and expectations...... sure she might be understanding what the common average person has to go through in the dating world today but she will still aim high cause that's the world she was raised in
Back in the day it was the singles group at church for me. Everyone is nearly on the same page where it is really important. There were always people to talk to and things to do. We also got together with other church singles groups to do all kinds of activities. It was the most free I ever felt to just talk to girls. I finally met my bride there. I was bristling with confidence and built a relationship from a good starting foundation.
0:11 “Work on yourself, for sure. Be constantly improving.” I think this almost gets it right. However, “be improving” emphasizes on the *result*, while a successful outcome is not always in your control despite your efforts. Instead, be dedicated and devoted to yourself: to tackling your fears, insecurities, your weaknesses. For me, that meant practicing eye contact, giving compliments (not only to girls, but in general), showing up to busy social situations, and *eventually* asking a girl out. It has been a long road, but if you're unwilling to walk you'll not get anywhere.
That's terrible advice, and the reason why dating is a waste of time. Women like Bret Cooper want a man who has already struggled, already achieved his goals, already reached the top. It's simply not worth taking these women seriously anymore.
@@PettyCrow-n9c Personally I think that this is good advice because for someone like me I’ve always been scared talking to women. However, I didn’t level up to my expectations, I just listened to what others say. The true thing is get off of TH-cam and live your life make those mistakes, work on these things and you’ll eventually succeed. Yes it will take long but the most worthwhile things don’t come quickly, they take a long time.
What she is failing to mention with "pick up the conversation" is as a man it is up to you to pick up the Indicators Of Interest. You cannot be her "friend", continue to talk, and not make a move. If you do not pick up the IOIs then move along and start chatting with the next girl.
unfortunately women dont want men that do nothing and have nothing, thats not a good way of ensuring the success of their future family. you dont need to be a rich man, but you at least need to work hard and be proactive at improving yourself and your finances.
*The trick to overcoming awkwardness is to approach with a mindset of curiosity rather than impressing. Ask open-ended questions about her interests - it keeps the conversation engaging while taking the pressure off you to perform.*
I've been doing all these developments this year and the women in my area are either married already with kids, not worth a shit, or I'm not attracted to them in the slightest. What a fun situation that will eventually force me to up and move somewhere else.
Strange because Ive done just that in my life and all it got me was a wife that doesnt listen, doesnt respect me and turns people against me. So let me add this, vet the hell out of any woman you want to be with before investing energy and heart into the relationship. Im not knocking the advice, just saying it aint so cut and dry.
So you a lo say that partially its mens fault...that most men raised their daughter in wrong way. Because as Dr. Bruce Lipton exaplains in hudreds oif videos the behavior of adults is affected 90 percent by their childhood, and hgow thye laerned in childhood, because subconmsciosu midn was created in childhood. and it contoinues toa dulthood because its 90 poercents ubconsciosu program, but its possibel to reprogram bad habits.
They didn’t say anything here about how to choose a partner, or how to make an insufferable marriage workable. That’s another topic entirely. Plenty of podcasts about that out there, but what they did say about dating is common sense and reasonable. Unfortunately relationships often do not work out, and if that’s the case you don’t have to stay within it.
"How To Find A Good Woman" - here in the US, it's a simple 2-step process: 1. Contact the State Department, and inquire about something called a 'passport'; 2. Wait for little blue book to arrive in the mail.
It's sad, but true. The more I experience the dating world, the less I want to experience dating in the west. It's truly disgusting. Brett may be an exception, but I honestly don't think she's as wholesome as she puts off. She still believes feminism was a good thing even after seeing the end result. From what I've seen, she's shown to not really respect her husband. But what do I know?
word of advice brother, WHATEVER kind of WOMEN you have in YOUR country is the SAME kind of WOMEN in OTHER countries. you MAY NOT be the TOP percentile MEN to WESTERN women but you WILL certainly be the TOP percentile MEN to OTHER women.
@@timelyferryevery society has the same dating culture? That's news to me. Especially since in the US women will call it sexual harassment if you say hi at the gym.
She doesn‘t answer the question. The question was: „How do I find a GOOD woman?“ The question was not: „How do I attract (as many as possible) women?“ This is a big difference!
There's not a difference All women want the same traits Leadership, ambition, humour, charm, shamelessness, etc What gets a man many women is what eventually gets him a "good woman"
The problem is women are so picky you have to try to attract a wide array of women. I don't understand how women don't get this. That's why the guys that can get lots of women don't commit. If they have to put in all of this work to attract you then why work on a relationship when he can kick you to the curb and gl after the next woman? (until she asks for more, then repeat)
How to get a good woman. Answer, work on yourself to attract any woman implying that all women are good proving that very few women are capable of taking accountability. Yes work on yourself. But mainly learn to love yourself , set standards and boundaries and learn to decipher between the qualities necessary in a woman to make her your wife
Combining this video and the forbidden book called Flirtosphere Seduction made it so incredibly helpful for me. I was not successful with women, however this is a game changer. Guys, it's THAT amazing
I just posted a video about this: Partner Dancing. Half of the room is filled with women, they're WANTING you to ask them to dance, and you start off by holding hands! It is legit the most perfect setup. From there, you figure out if you vibe or not.
What man would take advice from a 22 year old girl who's never experienced a day in the life as a man? That's like asking a homeless man for financial advice.
Agreed! However, I will say she had good advice. I just posted up a video why Social Dancing was the best thing for me to meet women. Dating apps and bars have such a low ROI for men. Work on yourself and go to places where you'll see the same women multiple times, in person.
I love Pickleball, I started a few months ago, and I play 3 to 4 times a week with 2 hour sessions. I have met more new friends in the last 3 months playing pickleball than I have in the last 5 years of my life. My mood has been more upbeat, and I have something to look forward to do in the week. I get a lot of exercise from it. I have become more social, and I feel it has made a very good impact on my life in a very short period of time. Yes, running clubs are definitely low key dating events.
man: advice for find a good woman? woman: just be a perfect man.. man: what do y...? woman: ...in every single thing man: ok but.. what should I do? woman: everything man: ... woman: .. and in a good way
I mean I am a 22 year old guy and I have 5 exes. I feel like you need to learn lessons and be better as you grow. You can be 22 but have the wisdom of a 60 year old. lol my friends and my most recent ex said that 😂
@@Brian-zx2pf she does dancing and showing her "outfit" videos in tiktok.... and she is married? thats NOT a conservative woman.... she lives from men's attention
@@prestow that sounds naive. Anyone you let into your heart can hurt you. The idea that it’s all on men to be perfect in the face of a rollercoaster is honestly a bit toxic.
@@mobiusinversion We're both right. What I'm saying is that first you should be a man's man, then you'll of course want a woman as capricious as you are. You're not even have friends that put you in trouble. But you only deserve the good ones when you're safe yourself first.
I really love this point. No matter who you are, taking care of yourself really says a lot about you. No guy wants to date a girl that doesn't take car of herself and neither will a girl date a guy that doesn't take care of himself. Just solid.
@@chiartspire It also indirectly signals what you tolerate from others. If you developed the strength to overcome your own excuses, you're way less likely to accept it from others 💪
There's a book called Flirtosphere Seduction by Vexoner and it talks from body language and conversation starters to dark mind tricks and flirting through texts, it's the real deal
@@Marking_The_Way You kidding? The Tinder experiment where the dude was a PDF-file and had women THROWING themselves at him. Be tall, and hot and you can do no wrong.
What are the “very little emotional things we do” mean? I’d say if you aren’t good enough at communicating then don’t blame it on emotional things to protect your ego. Sacrifice your ego if a relationship is more important than your ego
Approaching a woman is not scary. What is scary is her way of reacting to you. A lot of women are just mean and if you as a man expecting a sweet and lovely human being and she is distant, cold, and with contempt then it becomes very scary. Brett will react in a good way, but you can’t see that on the outside, do you? Better is it, to not care if she likes you or not. Just be a fun person to be around. Pick up the conversation IF YOU like her. As a man you can choose too. Don’t go for a woman that just gives you attention. Go for the woman that also works on herself, and is fun to be around. If you find it scary, most of the time it’s a sign that she can be bad in reacting to you. It’s a signal to be aware of the possible rejection.
5:00 - "Go to a run club, nobody goes there for the running anyways, they walk half the time and just talk" 5:20 - "It's crazy that it's revolutionary" Sadly telling people they need to be AROUND the same women, CONSISTENTLY week by week at the very least is REVOLUTIONARY today because most guys (me included) don't even have outdoor hobbies anymore (I created a home gym because the commute kills my drive to workout, so I just started cold approaching which is WAY scarier than what these guys suggest, but also way more rewarding as it's a SKILL of COMMUNICATION with strangers and that's valuable anywhere you go. You don't have to be crazy like me, but just join anything social OUTDOORS - WOW 2024 sure is a crazy year
The most important thing to me was not mentioned - character development: integrity, faithfulness, kindness, gentleness, meekness, patience, empathy...
No one has time to learn everything from scratch, you'd be 250 years old before you worked it all out. Learn from others who have already made the mistakes and the apply your own filter if it's relevant for you or not.
😂 let a man tell a woman to work on herself and see the outcome. Let him tell her to lose weight, drink more electrolytes and move more 💀. It all fun and games until the tables have turned💀. Too many excuses but also not much accountability 🤡
Exactly. It’s all a one way street with dating nowadays. The girls nowadays are told that they’re born perfect and die perfect and that they don’t change themselves for anybody or anything. All of this “self improvement” and “working on yourself” garbage is for the blokes. That’s basically all I ever hear from these “dating advice” vids.
the real pro tip for success. Dont go asking other people for advice before trying something your genuinely interested in. just go for it, and when your there in the middle of it all youll figure out if its working or not working. and simply allow yourself to reserve judgement for later. unless it puts your physical health at risk then of course do some homework beforehand. i mean some ideas are not bright ideas. but if the root to your concern is fear of embarrassment or fear of hurting your ego well then stop that. go find out there and see if you can date that girl or go out there and get a job. dont stop yourself from doing something because you think too much or worry to much or dont know enough. its a whole lot easier to know exactly what something is by doing it. then thinking about it later.. example: l know when your mopping floors for 10 bucks an hour you probably think " fuck man i dont want to be a janitor" unless thats your thing then more power to you
10 pushups changed my life, I started with 10 pushups and now I do 5K a month. I've also been able to face and overcome challenges that have had the biggest and best affect on my life. 10 pushups is everything, man.
That is awesome to hear! I'm doing biceps/triceps every day, even if it's small amount of weights. I'm really excited to see where the consistency takes me.
At the end of the day, you should be doing all of these things just for yourself. Not to attract any woman or anybody. Society puts all this pressure on men to do these amazing things, yet women can just sit there with little to no improvement. Work on yourself. Become the best version of yourself. Do it for yourself. If a woman happens to come along, and you find her deserving of all of your hard work, that’s great. But do it for yourself.
Only 3 things to improve to turn around your luck with women: 1. Your levels of exercise: this is needed for the mental clarity and not necessarily to get jacked to earn affection. 2. Your grooming: People are more receptive to conversations when you look and smell nice/presentable. 3. Your social skills: Learn to tell a story, to tell a joke... learn to flirt and enjoy conversations, even if they don't lead to a romantic rendezvous. Stop investing emotional resources into controlling the outcome of a conversation and try to enjoy the process of getting to know people as much as possible. Two book recommendations: 1. How to win friends and influence people 2. Models by Mark Manson
It's a loop. The first 100 times need to accept it is going to suck. Another possibility is you get lucky and that lifts your confidence. That starts the upward cycle :)
and if she was 62 you would say that she was 'old and out of touch with the dating market'. Some of you will find any reason to continue to be a loser.
@@mooninites755 I mean you ironically make a good point. Why would you take advice from someone who is either too young to have experience or too old to understand shifting attitudes? Listening to people in between makes the most sense.
@@user-og6hl6lv7p I think the broader point is the second half'; Brett could be any age and these people would find a reason to discredit her advice because they're not looking for advice and they're just looking to be validated. These are not single people looking to find a partner, they're single people looking to feel justified as to why their single.
I’m in no way an expert. But I married in my biased opinion the most amazing woman in the world. And I didn’t expect it to ever happen. But one thing she even will say to this day is when we first met I never talked like it was a “first date”. I just would talk to her, and we’d learn about each other organically. She always liked how a week would go by and we’d go on another date and I’d greet her and be like “so this wild Thing happened!….”. Also I taught myself to cook and worked out. But just showing her first hand of having those skills. So many dudes just don’t try to show their day to day skills, and they need to. I remember I went over to her place to cook for the first time and I just busted out a recipe without any instructions. Made her leftovers to take to work. And cleaned up the kitchen after. It’s not “simping” or “trying too hard”. Just show you can socialize and do something more than heat up a tv dinner.
1. Go to the gym I truly believe fitness is the onw thing in life you truly can't fake. Doesnt matter if you take all the gear or none at all. You still have to put in the work. That's why when you see someone who is in shape you automatically subconsciously have a base level of respect for them because of the consistent discipline they put in to build and maintain their fitness. You automatically respect them just for that alone. 🙂💪
My advice to men is this. Women take themselves really serious and if you take them at face value it's gonna go nowhere. You need to just chill out and don't look to deeply into what they say. All the guys I know who have had big success with girls don't overthink it. If they get turned down they just laugh and move on to the next one. Dating is a numbers game but your not gonna be able to hit those numbers if you obsess over everything the first girl says. I've seen girls give out long demands about what they need in a man and then a guy they find attractive turns up, and that list is thrown out the window in 2mins. Now just imagine if you was sitting there actually taking that girls list seriously lol. And remember we do the same thing. Big fat ugly girl might be willing to do everything we want but we don't want her because we don't fancy her. Well girls are allowed to do the same back. Men are not special. Don't let the first girls comment stop you talking to the next 30.
I’m out of the “meeting” game because of my age. But I advice my middle age single friends “why do you want to meet women”. The trollers I dismiss. If they say to find a wife, I advise them to be realistic and look for only two invaluable factors. 1. Do she share the same values and Faith as you? And 2. Observe everything you can about her financial responsibility. Do not judge her by her family, education, or emotions, unless she displays any kind of abnormal behavior. 😊
She didn't answer the question, she only outlined the traits a man should have which doesn't mean you'll attract a good woman. Even before this video started I knew you don't ask a fish how to catch a fish but I was still curious as to what she was going to say and her facial expression showed she really didn't have the answer to the question. First define what a good woman is to you, then you find out where women like that would congregate i.e. church, library etc. (not night clubs) then you have to ask certain questions with tact to find out certain character traits, you're looking for certain behaviors etc. does she dress modestly? is she always looking for attention? is she materialistic? does she have kids (which is a major red flag)? is she willing to sign a prenup? does she have a high body count? (this question you'll have to get around to asking later on, there's ways to ask it without being on the nose) etc. etc. You have to be clear on what it is that you want from your woman its going to be different things for different guys then go about finding out whether the women you end up on dates with have what you're looking for. The worst thing a man can do is simp and only focus on looks.
I agree with a lot of this! Don't just go for a pretty face and a girl that is settling. However, it requires a lot of patience. I just posted a video about how Partner Dancing helps so much. In 4 hours you can dance with like 50 new women. Some you'll become friends with and see again. But the point being, it allows you to be more selective and have a lot more options.
It's not complicated, women are attracted to effort. If she likes you, she'll cleverly invade your space. Just say hi and be yourself. If it doesn't feel right, you'll know quick and it was fun, but you may end up with a new friend. win win!
If you don't know how women typically act, it is challenging to know when it is intentional or coincidence. It's best when you experience a range and multiple reps :)
The problem with the whole "Be a leader" kinda thing is that it's kind of paradoxical... not every man can be a leader in every situation (I assume there is always some niche situations where everyone can shine as a leader tho)
Improve yourself - internally and externally. Be a leader Understand the nuance of dating - go beyond dating. Be able to carry a conversation beyond romantic interests.
Forget everything she said. Focus on making YOU happy. If you are happy at your 9-5, don’t feel the need to change. If you are happy with your level of fitness, own it. Be confident and comfortable with who YOU are. Because the rest is just vanity, and women who chase that are unreliable and not worth your time. Be who you are and if a woman accepts you for that and wants to be with you, you have a much better chance. Online dating is not the demon people make it out to be. Yes, it’s difficult. There’s lots of rejection. But you are able to put yourself out there in front of 1,000s of women. If you go to a run club you’re going to put yourself in front of like 6 women and 3 of them probably already have bfs/husbands that run with them.
I thought a good relationship was when two personalities get along together happily. None of this be your best self mentality. That's something totally different.
Practically: Actively do your own things, even apply to ladies too. Sometimes we can be a little bit lazy, but not too passive that 'expect to have millions of dollars fall from the clouds above as a rain' Don't try so hard just to please (wo)men, set up your own green & red flags in your standard lists Honestly, to simplify things in shorter lines: Most couples broke up with each other derives from the very fact that, they are not IN SYNC with the significant other
Most woman from 18 - 40 (1984 - 2006) in America 🇺🇸 don't know what they want when it comes to dating. Will tell a guy that they are not interested in them. Then when the guy goes away they get there feelings hurt and ask "Why isn't that guy paying me attention anymore!?" You literally just told the guy you are not interested in him, but you want him to stick around to keep getting rejected by you. What guy out there wants to talk , spend time with a girl/woman that isn't interested in them.
I always assume women that want to talk to me are just being nice, I am basically blind to signals due to misreading “signals” so bad in the past. Dating is hard
I've been IN PERSON at things hundreds upon hundreds upon hundreds of times and still nothing. I did the gym for 9 months or so and didn't speak with anyone there, it was just me and my mate. I mean even if a girl did like me or showed a bit of interest then she would've at least have made it known to me in some way, but no. Everyone just sticks to their exercise and earbuds in/headphones on and ignores everyone else there. It's really soulless tbh. I've been to the same pub (for you US people this is a place similar to a bar but not very big places and where people can just go to relax with friends, play pool and enjoy some music) for like 3 years after COVID to keep it in business. I've had attention from 2 single Moms but they're really not the type of women I'm wanting I'm afraid. I want a woman without kids, if that's too much to ask... Another girl seems to be playing hot and cold and in recent months I haven't been there that much because I've just had too many other things going on, like 4-6 music concerts, a trip to Spain, my work's annual conference which I had to prepare a speech for, family birthdays, including my own, etc. It's really nowhere near as simple as just being somewhere in person and I'm sorry but people get too anxious these days whenever you try and start a conversation with them. The only sure fire way is having friends with you or knowing a friend of another group who can then be the link between you and the girl you want to talk to. And given how tricky that is, because girls with friend groups who are actually decent are pretty much always going to be able to find a guy without much trouble, it's more about luck and timing about being at a place in person when any said girl just so happens to be single. If you're there a few months early she may not be interested having just got out of a breakup, or a few months late then she's already working on getting to know a new guy. It's all just LUCK
To me this stuff has always been obvious. I think most people know what a good, desirable person is, it's just difficult to pursue that ideal. People either don't know how to start, what to do, or they know what they have to do but they're afraid to start because they're afraid of failing or have so much self loathing that they just can't find the motivation to better themselves. The first step before you do anything to make yourself more desirable is to get your head in order. Deal with your demons and find help to better yourself so you aren't just floundering on what to do with yourself. Then you can start improving in other ways without any handicap. Once you're right with yourself you can worry about finding the right one
Hello you savages. Watch the full episode with Brett here - th-cam.com/video/v39se0OQyIs/w-d-xo.html Get a 20% discount on Nomatic's amazing luggage at nomatic.com/modernwisdom (use code MW20)
You should have scooped her up when she was single Chris… the chemistry between you two is clear thru the screen in EVERY in-person interaction Ive ever seen you two in
He’s married
They don't exist.
Notice the feminine approach here -- he asked the question how to find (or get) a good woman, and Brett went on to list the traits you need to acquire. This implies passivity that the right woman will land in your lap once you acquire certain traits.
The masculine reality is that you need to go through the painful process of approaching, rejection, getting ghosted, setting up dates, carrying conversations with little to no engagement on her part.
Well, would you go out with a woman who doesn't actively work on herself?
@@lars2894 i think you replied to the wrong comment
@@lars2894Your reading comprehension skills are terrible.
@@lars2894 Have you seen what an avarage woman's inbox looks like on social media or on dating apps? They are flooded with potential partners.
@@Ziggyvu Because we men tyically don't notice women who make the effort. We only notice the ones who don't have to. Which is the problem when it comes to men as well.
Ask 100 women this question you'll get 200 different answers.
It's pretty straightforward
200 wrong* answers
@@oliwardcomics god i love watching men get confused over the existential question "what do women want?" i will tell you the truth. "we dont know."
😂😂
she gived a 7 minutes answer....... but literally said nothing.
"work on yourself"....... hahaha only works if you are handsome already.
It explains things most guys don’t think about. I also learned a lot from reading a book called Flirtosphere Seduction by Vexoner. The book helped me understand women better and feel more confident. Combining tips from videos like this and the book really made a difference for me.
Chris knows what he's doing by putting Ana in the thumbnail, great work.
Literal goddess.
She is perfection
Ana who?
@@Prodigy_Il Ana de Armas. Actor, including a being a Bond Girl.
Fake news. Spam. Click-bait. Whatever you want to call it, it's fucking trash, and it's a big part of why people hate the internet's attention-based economy.
Control what you can control guys. This means career and wellness and being consistently proactive about your overall wellbeing, physical and all. The right one may come along, they may not. But at least live a life in which you can truly be happy with yourself.
Good tips, but one key component is the man has to make the first move. Meaning, he has to approach the woman and talk to her. We’re hard wired this way. Woman that approach first are the exception to the rule. They generally wait for us to take the lead.
🎯
@@andrebaxter4023 they can wait forever for all i care i aint tryna catch a case for just approaching someone HELL NO
@@andrebaxter4023The issue is Women aren’t very good at signaling “Hey I like you” which can easily be signaled with making constant eye contact or maybe giving off body signals. It cannot be all on the man to guess which woman finds him attractive, women can definitely help by giving off a signal.
@@deliboi93Did you watch the video? Clubs and repeat locations help you build rapport to avoid this problem.
The reality is even with all the changes, women dont generally approach a guy even if they are interested. They put themselves in a place where they could be approached by a guy they might be interested in, and if you dont do something, then nothings going to happen.
Yes exactly holy shit.
I did ask two guys out and was kindly rejected. At least I know how hard it is. However when some guys got close to me and I already knew I didn't feel anything for them, since they were in my group of friends, I asked the other friends to open their eyes because I was feeling very unconfortable and thought that they would talk about those things. Every single time I was forced to sit with one of them or with the other one. And these other friends -all men- told me that women should help each other. In the end I had to stop going out with this group. I know these guys are now happily married with children and I am happy for them, but I feel the same about them. We had no connection, I felt no attraction at all. One of them was very fat. And it is not that I am a super model or that I wanted to date a supermodel but he did not take care of himself when he was young. I couldn't imagine how he would be when becoming a bit older. It is really hard to know when somebody you like likes you back or is just being polite; however, it is quite easy to know when somebody is after you and you do not particularly like that person. Love makes us blind.
@@anabegins7349I've never asked someone out, ive been thinking about doing it though, im currently 16 but my biggest dream has always been to have children of my own, i hope to have a kiddo by 21, i feel like im running out of time, hopefully all goes well
So read minds? Good to know...
Go on dating sites that are intended for relationships not pick up sites, the girls will chase you.
That’s all great advice. But how do we find Ana de Armas?
Be Ana de Armas equivalent in the male world:)
Its an off the shelf item, sorry.
Learn Spanish go to Columbia
You become a Blade Runner
Just be yourself (comma) Bro
Ask a pretty 22yo lady where to find a good woman.😂
They will say, “I dunno. Guys usually find me wherever I go.”.
LOL thou art wise!
Step 1) go outside
and?
That's one of the most important tips my father gave to me, and it really works, be it to fix your mind, to find women or for a job.
Noooooo
Nooooooooo 😂
Mission failed (as an introvert)
Women ignore me when I'm not even interested in them. When I'm in coffee shops/sauna/hiking/gym etc - women basically NEVER initiate any conversation first. I basically only speak to guys, they actually make effort to start conversations. I went on a hiking trip recently with 15 strangers and all the women ignored me until I spoke to them first.
Women passivity is the same in dating, they expect me to do everything - approach, plan dates, keep in touch etc. They don't even give any signals of interest. Juice ain't worth the squeeze for entitled women. Guess I'll stay single.
I feel that brother and im an attractive physically fit young guy😢
Exactly. Why even bother when they treat us as invisible. There should be atleast some signs of interest from them for guys to feel motivated to initiate talk. If not, there's a good chance that the relationship won't last long.
@@carlwagner4565 seriously though, why do you think this is? Many people have said I'm good looking before and I'm 6'5. I almost know for a fact it's not my physical appearance.
Is this just how it works? Women essentially ignore men? They can't even speak to us in a friendly manner?
Well, I'm sure there are many factors at play here.
The first thing that I will say is the size difference. On average, men are larger than women, and they may find this intimidating and if they are intimidated, they are less likely to initiate a conversation. I saw that you mentioned your height and if that is true, then they may be intimidated by your size, regardless of your perceived looks.
Secondly, I will mention the gendered differences. I know there is equality today and so on, but there is less of a 'burden of performance' in regard to women. They aren't expected to be assertive and start the conversation, which is seen as a masculine trait. So, they may have never learned to put themselves out there to initiate anything, especially with dating. They will wait for everyone to come to them first, because why not? They don't need to be the one who risks rejection and can be the submissive, docile one.
My third and final point is about the social media world and how women and men trust each other less and less. The social media creators are talking about how the opposite sex can't be trusted and blah and blah. I'm sure there are more points, but those are the three that I thought of.
TL;DR
1. Size Differences -> Intimidated -> Less Likely To Start A Conversation
2. Gendered Differences -> Women Aren't Expected To Be Initiators
3. Social Media -> General Distrust Of Opposite Sex
@@delete1805 nah.. that aint it.. it is pretty simple.. dude is average or maybe above average.. point is, even an average chick will get tons of dms in her instagtam so she doenst feel the need to "chase" after guys.. no incentive to start convos when extremely attractive dudes are already doing it.. that is it
So basically what she said you need to become the best version of yourself possible: become successful,fit,mentally-emotionally strong and in return you get a woman who doesn't do sh*t but she expected for you reach your pinnacle..
@@KorisnickoIme84 Basically confident without being cocky. Tons of Rizz & authenticity. I'm pretty old but your age doesn't even register with them when they recognize & gaze cuz they caught u cruising through their area.
well, what type of woman you end up being with is entirely up to you, isn’t it? have the self respect and don’t date women that don’t do sh*t. go for women that actually want to improve themselves, put in effort and strive to be their best too. you have women that don’t work on themselves at all expecting a prince, and you also have men that lay on their couch all day, don’t work on themselves and expect a princess because they’re “nice”.
look at ask yourself honestly, and ask yourself “what do I deserve” and don’t settle for anything less.
@@nanofyurbiznes
I have the wisdom now & sometime when I was younger I had the ability to see potential. Never gave the look @ the ones that were showered with attention. But the gals that were mentally there with a kind & soft spoken way about them caught my eye & still do to this day.
fax bro, women just dont seem to provide anything or bring anything to the table. it’s like dating a bunch of rocks
@@jacksonwilliams1262 low quality women don’t. there are good women out there, my friend. but remember that they also expect the same from you. keep working on yourself and don’t settle for someone who isn’t worth it.
Some of these women have their expectations set by social media it makes dating impossible.
so are Brett Cooper's expectations as well......otherwise she would have married an ice cream vendor.....she ain't gonna marry beneath her means and expectations...... sure she might be understanding what the common average person has to go through in the dating world today but she will still aim high cause that's the world she was raised in
The women you want have these expectations. Plenty of women don't.
most** actually all* in 1st world countries
Back in the day it was the singles group at church for me. Everyone is nearly on the same page where it is really important. There were always people to talk to and things to do. We also got together with other church singles groups to do all kinds of activities. It was the most free I ever felt to just talk to girls. I finally met my bride there. I was bristling with confidence and built a relationship from a good starting foundation.
Love this! I haven't heard of any churches having this in a while sadly
instructions unclear, i am not dating ana de armas?
0:11 “Work on yourself, for sure. Be constantly improving.” I think this almost gets it right. However, “be improving” emphasizes on the *result*, while a successful outcome is not always in your control despite your efforts.
Instead, be dedicated and devoted to yourself: to tackling your fears, insecurities, your weaknesses. For me, that meant practicing eye contact, giving compliments (not only to girls, but in general), showing up to busy social situations, and *eventually* asking a girl out. It has been a long road, but if you're unwilling to walk you'll not get anywhere.
That's terrible advice, and the reason why dating is a waste of time. Women like Bret Cooper want a man who has already struggled, already achieved his goals, already reached the top. It's simply not worth taking these women seriously anymore.
@@PettyCrow-n9c Personally I think that this is good advice because for someone like me I’ve always been scared talking to women. However, I didn’t level up to my expectations, I just listened to what others say. The true thing is get off of TH-cam and live your life make those mistakes, work on these things and you’ll eventually succeed. Yes it will take long but the most worthwhile things don’t come quickly, they take a long time.
What she is failing to mention with "pick up the conversation" is as a man it is up to you to pick up the Indicators Of Interest. You cannot be her "friend", continue to talk, and not make a move. If you do not pick up the IOIs then move along and start chatting with the next girl.
Brett pretty much confirming that women dont love men unconditionally they love what they provide.
Which I love watching Brett Cooper, but I do have to agree with you as well. Guess I'll just die single. Dating has been ruined by feminism anyway.
unfortunately women dont want men that do nothing and have nothing, thats not a good way of ensuring the success of their future family. you dont need to be a rich man, but you at least need to work hard and be proactive at improving yourself and your finances.
@pjb936 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 that's a good one
@@pjb936 Exactly. Nature has a reason for its programming. Got us this far.
*The trick to overcoming awkwardness is to approach with a mindset of curiosity rather than impressing. Ask open-ended questions about her interests - it keeps the conversation engaging while taking the pressure off you to perform.*
I'll try to live by that. Not in seeking of relationships necessarly, but just in conversations in general. Thanks bro
Just don't over ask questions. I used to ask too many and be seen as an interrogator 😅😭
@@mejdlocraftci Seek good convo, you'll win regardless :)
I've been doing all these developments this year and the women in my area are either married already with kids, not worth a shit, or I'm not attracted to them in the slightest. What a fun situation that will eventually force me to up and move somewhere else.
same brother. It's rough out here
Summary of Brett's Answer: I don't know
No woman knows....lmao
Never ask a woman how to pick a women. It's like asking fish how to catch them, instead of asking fisherman.
Strange because Ive done just that in my life and all it got me was a wife that doesnt listen, doesnt respect me and turns people against me. So let me add this, vet the hell out of any woman you want to be with before investing energy and heart into the relationship. Im not knocking the advice, just saying it aint so cut and dry.
So you a lo say that partially its mens fault...that most men raised their daughter in wrong way.
Because as Dr. Bruce Lipton exaplains in hudreds oif videos the behavior of adults is affected 90 percent by their childhood, and hgow thye laerned in childhood, because subconmsciosu midn was created in childhood. and it contoinues toa dulthood because its 90 poercents ubconsciosu program, but its possibel to reprogram bad habits.
You picked wrong then. Thats not all women.
They didn’t say anything here about how to choose a partner, or how to make an insufferable marriage workable. That’s another topic entirely. Plenty of podcasts about that out there, but what they did say about dating is common sense and reasonable. Unfortunately relationships often do not work out, and if that’s the case you don’t have to stay within it.
@@MariCatherinee That's his WHOLE POINT!
He's saying not to make the mistake he did!
"How To Find A Good Woman" - here in the US, it's a simple 2-step process:
1. Contact the State Department, and inquire about something called a 'passport';
2. Wait for little blue book to arrive in the mail.
It's sad, but true. The more I experience the dating world, the less I want to experience dating in the west. It's truly disgusting. Brett may be an exception, but I honestly don't think she's as wholesome as she puts off. She still believes feminism was a good thing even after seeing the end result. From what I've seen, she's shown to not really respect her husband. But what do I know?
word of advice brother, WHATEVER kind of WOMEN you have in YOUR country is the SAME kind of WOMEN in OTHER countries.
you MAY NOT be the TOP percentile MEN to WESTERN women but you WILL certainly be the TOP percentile MEN to OTHER women.
@@fuzzy_wuzzy45 yup women are same everywhere. this victim mentality needs to go.
@@timelyferryevery society has the same dating culture? That's news to me. Especially since in the US women will call it sexual harassment if you say hi at the gym.
She doesn‘t answer the question. The question was:
„How do I find a GOOD woman?“
The question was not:
„How do I attract (as many as possible) women?“
This is a big difference!
It's probably a numbers game...the trick is to NOT fall in love with a not so good or bad woman.
There's not a difference
All women want the same traits
Leadership, ambition, humour, charm, shamelessness, etc
What gets a man many women is what eventually gets him a "good woman"
The problem is women are so picky you have to try to attract a wide array of women.
I don't understand how women don't get this.
That's why the guys that can get lots of women don't commit. If they have to put in all of this work to attract you then why work on a relationship when he can kick you to the curb and gl after the next woman? (until she asks for more, then repeat)
Don't ask the fish how to catch fish...ask the fisherman.
@@johnnymac6178😂😂😂 The life of the Fisherman would be much more better if he could know what fish really want...
Delayed gratification. That's relationships, that's marriage, that's commitment.
How to get a good woman.
Answer, work on yourself to attract any woman implying that all women are good proving that very few women are capable of taking accountability.
Yes work on yourself.
But mainly learn to love yourself , set standards and boundaries and learn to decipher between the qualities necessary in a woman to make her your wife
1. Go out. 2. Get a passport 3. Go overseas.
😂😂😂😂
The G trials.
It isn't much better in most countries tbh
@@zonomena9153 Surely can't be worse in some of them compared to America... right?
this girl thinks she is a 10. but she is a 6/10 being generous.
Combining this video and the forbidden book called Flirtosphere Seduction made it so incredibly helpful for me. I was not successful with women, however this is a game changer. Guys, it's THAT amazing
I just posted a video about this: Partner Dancing. Half of the room is filled with women, they're WANTING you to ask them to dance, and you start off by holding hands!
It is legit the most perfect setup. From there, you figure out if you vibe or not.
What man would take advice from a 22 year old girl who's never experienced a day in the life as a man? That's like asking a homeless man for financial advice.
Agreed! However, I will say she had good advice. I just posted up a video why Social Dancing was the best thing for me to meet women.
Dating apps and bars have such a low ROI for men.
Work on yourself and go to places where you'll see the same women multiple times, in person.
I love Pickleball, I started a few months ago, and I play 3 to 4 times a week with 2 hour sessions. I have met more new friends in the last 3 months playing pickleball than I have in the last 5 years of my life. My mood has been more upbeat, and I have something to look forward to do in the week. I get a lot of exercise from it. I have become more social, and I feel it has made a very good impact on my life in a very short period of time. Yes, running clubs are definitely low key dating events.
man: advice for find a good woman?
woman: just be a perfect man..
man: what do y...?
woman: ...in every single thing
man: ok but.. what should I do?
woman: everything
man: ...
woman: .. and in a good way
Lol and when asking women how to improve themselves the crickets chirp
You really bad at listening. Must be hard being so simple. That's not what she said at all.
Would love to hear a conversation with her and Patrice ONeal..RIP
Patrice was ahead of the curve in regards to understanding women via the “Red Pill” lens
Asking a 22 year old this question has gotta be the worst question Chris has done😂😂😂I love you chris but damn dawg
I mean I am a 22 year old guy and I have 5 exes. I feel like you need to learn lessons and be better as you grow. You can be 22 but have the wisdom of a 60 year old. lol my friends and my most recent ex said that 😂
@@christianrodriguez53465 exes where you did the breaking up?
She’s married and a good woman so
@@Brian-zx2pf she does dancing and showing her "outfit" videos in tiktok.... and she is married?
thats NOT a conservative woman.... she lives from men's attention
I’d like to find a clear and unconfusing woman. That would be good.
I think hell will freeze over first. Wish ya luck brother!
It's the opposite, you should be so confident and experienced that no man or woman will throw you off your game
@@Ch1naVirus possibly, but I have a lot better things to do with my time until then, so win win 👍
@@prestow that sounds naive. Anyone you let into your heart can hurt you. The idea that it’s all on men to be perfect in the face of a rollercoaster is honestly a bit toxic.
@@mobiusinversion We're both right. What I'm saying is that first you should be a man's man, then you'll of course want a woman as capricious as you are. You're not even have friends that put you in trouble. But you only deserve the good ones when you're safe yourself first.
swagger
that's what they want
masculine swagger
its density in feeling
you have it when you dont waste ur energy
Low key love the Lululemon shorts. Running a marathon in them I get no chaffing or anything. Feels great.
I really love this point.
No matter who you are, taking care of yourself really says a lot about you. No guy wants to date a girl that doesn't take car of herself and neither will a girl date a guy that doesn't take care of himself. Just solid.
100%! Don't look at it as good s*x. It shows the person takes care of themselves, which means they are more likely to treat you good as well!
@Marking_The_Way Exactly. How you treat yourself says a whole lot about you.
@@chiartspire It also indirectly signals what you tolerate from others.
If you developed the strength to overcome your own excuses, you're way less likely to accept it from others 💪
@Marking_The_Way So true. Our actions are influenced by how we view and interpret the world around us.
There's a book called Flirtosphere Seduction by Vexoner and it talks from body language and conversation starters to dark mind tricks and flirting through texts, it's the real deal
You don't ask a fish the best way to catch it. You ask a fisherman. Don't rely on a woman for dating advice.
step 1: dont view women as fish to catch and instead view them as human beings
@@Pozywny Don't rely on women for dating advice.
The guys who say this don’t get any girls and probably never will
@@Pozywny that's a well know analogy you little princess of PC
@@Room-ms6wj don't rely on anyone* use your own resources
1: Be tall
2: Be hot.
That's it.
Like a good resume, it'll get your foot in the door. However, it won't seal the deal.
@@Marking_The_Way You kidding? The Tinder experiment where the dude was a PDF-file and had women THROWING themselves at him. Be tall, and hot and you can do no wrong.
I just loved the sponsorship promo he gave. So much passion. Actually made me want to go and see the product!
Literally first words out of her mouth. I'd like to know when are women going to start working on themselves.
What are the “very little emotional things we do” mean? I’d say if you aren’t good enough at communicating then don’t blame it on emotional things to protect your ego. Sacrifice your ego if a relationship is more important than your ego
Approaching a woman is not scary. What is scary is her way of reacting to you. A lot of women are just mean and if you as a man expecting a sweet and lovely human being and she is distant, cold, and with contempt then it becomes very scary. Brett will react in a good way, but you can’t see that on the outside, do you? Better is it, to not care if she likes you or not. Just be a fun person to be around. Pick up the conversation IF YOU like her. As a man you can choose too. Don’t go for a woman that just gives you attention. Go for the woman that also works on herself, and is fun to be around. If you find it scary, most of the time it’s a sign that she can be bad in reacting to you. It’s a signal to be aware of the possible rejection.
5:00 - "Go to a run club, nobody goes there for the running anyways, they walk half the time and just talk"
5:20 - "It's crazy that it's revolutionary"
Sadly telling people they need to be AROUND the same women, CONSISTENTLY week by week at the very least is REVOLUTIONARY today because most guys (me included) don't even have outdoor hobbies anymore (I created a home gym because the commute kills my drive to workout, so I just started cold approaching which is WAY scarier than what these guys suggest, but also way more rewarding as it's a SKILL of COMMUNICATION with strangers and that's valuable anywhere you go.
You don't have to be crazy like me, but just join anything social OUTDOORS - WOW 2024 sure is a crazy year
Excellent choice for the thumbnail, Chris 👌
The most important thing to me was not mentioned - character development: integrity, faithfulness, kindness, gentleness, meekness, patience, empathy...
Overseas. That's where you find them.
What are you British or something
And or stay away from big cities
What ever you do never go for French girls
@@dirtytrout3489only draw people like them
All these opinions seem like they were just passed down from others. Apply your own critical thinking to your own life and deal with the consequences.
No one has time to learn everything from scratch, you'd be 250 years old before you worked it all out. Learn from others who have already made the mistakes and the apply your own filter if it's relevant for you or not.
@@JCJW101that’s essentially what he said
😂 let a man tell a woman to work on herself and see the outcome. Let him tell her to lose weight, drink more electrolytes and move more 💀. It all fun and games until the tables have turned💀. Too many excuses but also not much accountability 🤡
Exactly. It’s all a one way street with dating nowadays. The girls nowadays are told that they’re born perfect and die perfect and that they don’t change themselves for anybody or anything. All of this “self improvement” and “working on yourself” garbage is for the blokes. That’s basically all I ever hear from these “dating advice” vids.
the run club - "a dating organization masquerading as a fitness pursuit"!!! lol!!! totally true... lol!!!!
I might need to work on my cardio 😅🤣
Great advice here.
I didn't know Ben Shapiro also did dating tips. Thanks Ben!
This girl is just so smart, very mature
the real pro tip for success. Dont go asking other people for advice before trying something your genuinely interested in. just go for it, and when your there in the middle of it all youll figure out if its working or not working. and simply allow yourself to reserve judgement for later. unless it puts your physical health at risk then of course do some homework beforehand. i mean some ideas are not bright ideas. but if the root to your concern is fear of embarrassment or fear of hurting your ego well then stop that. go find out there and see if you can date that girl or go out there and get a job. dont stop yourself from doing something because you think too much or worry to much or dont know enough. its a whole lot easier to know exactly what something is by doing it. then thinking about it later.. example: l know when your mopping floors for 10 bucks an hour you probably think " fuck man i dont want to be a janitor" unless thats your thing then more power to you
Lol i was doing 10 pushups a day. Now i am 3 weeks actively at the gym and I love it
The lighting is excellent
Step 1) build a Time Machine
10 pushups changed my life, I started with 10 pushups and now I do 5K a month. I've also been able to face and overcome challenges that have had the biggest and best affect on my life. 10 pushups is everything, man.
what challenges have you overcome
That is awesome to hear! I'm doing biceps/triceps every day, even if it's small amount of weights.
I'm really excited to see where the consistency takes me.
@@Marking_The_Way That's awesome to hear, man! Get at it 💪
@@Nova-mz9if Life gets rough every now and then
At the end of the day, you should be doing all of these things just for yourself. Not to attract any woman or anybody. Society puts all this pressure on men to do these amazing things, yet women can just sit there with little to no improvement. Work on yourself. Become the best version of yourself. Do it for yourself. If a woman happens to come along, and you find her deserving of all of your hard work, that’s great. But do it for yourself.
We just have to keep doing stuff and not get reciprocated.
she literally just described stalking someone, that's how you find a good woman according to Brett 🤣
Only 3 things to improve to turn around your luck with women:
1. Your levels of exercise: this is needed for the mental clarity and not necessarily to get jacked to earn affection.
2. Your grooming: People are more receptive to conversations when you look and smell nice/presentable.
3. Your social skills: Learn to tell a story, to tell a joke... learn to flirt and enjoy conversations, even if they don't lead to a romantic rendezvous. Stop investing emotional resources into controlling the outcome of a conversation and try to enjoy the process of getting to know people as much as possible.
Two book recommendations:
1. How to win friends and influence people
2. Models by Mark Manson
Ana de Armas in the thumbnail is very smart
Don’t overthink it, you see an attractive women….talk to her, that’s it! Let the energy and tension take it from there.
It's a loop. The first 100 times need to accept it is going to suck. Another possibility is you get lucky and that lifts your confidence. That starts the upward cycle :)
Lets listen to the 22 year old with her vast wealth of experiences and knowledge...
Literally lma9
😂😂😂😂 😂😂 I will. BOT is learning💥!
and if she was 62 you would say that she was 'old and out of touch with the dating market'. Some of you will find any reason to continue to be a loser.
@@mooninites755 I mean you ironically make a good point. Why would you take advice from someone who is either too young to have experience or too old to understand shifting attitudes? Listening to people in between makes the most sense.
@@user-og6hl6lv7p I think the broader point is the second half'; Brett could be any age and these people would find a reason to discredit her advice because they're not looking for advice and they're just looking to be validated. These are not single people looking to find a partner, they're single people looking to feel justified as to why their single.
I’m in no way an expert. But I married in my biased opinion the most amazing woman in the world. And I didn’t expect it to ever happen. But one thing she even will say to this day is when we first met I never talked like it was a “first date”. I just would talk to her, and we’d learn about each other organically. She always liked how a week would go by and we’d go on another date and I’d greet her and be like “so this wild
Thing happened!….”. Also I taught myself to cook and worked out. But just showing her first hand of having those skills. So many dudes just don’t try to show their day to day skills, and they need to. I remember I went over to her place to cook for the first time and I just busted out a recipe without any instructions. Made her leftovers to take to work. And cleaned up the kitchen after. It’s not “simping” or “trying too hard”. Just show you can socialize and do something more than heat up a tv dinner.
Does she ever do anything or?
@ all the time. It’s a two way street in a relationship
That is awesome dude! If you two are both happy, you won the lottery. So many people are dreaming of that.
1:04 which is impossible sometimes. Thanks for the tip tho
she is so well spoken
"stop fucking oppressing us" was comedic, but also valid lmao
Exercise a little daily, work on improving in your career, go to church, don't get addicted to dating apps.
And find a girl that does similarly
DUDE, best comment I've read on this video so far. YES.
Why does this conversation feel so superficial?
Actually though it pisses me off somehow
Because it is with a 20 years old kid. What do you expect?😂😂😂
Because he's talking to a woman
It honestly hurts the amount of truly beautiful women that have a of. Easily 8s, 9s, even 10s who have of. Finding a loyal woman is incredibly hard
Brett Cooper is my spirit animal when it comes to pickleball. PLAY TENNIS
1. Go to the gym
I truly believe fitness is the onw thing in life you truly can't fake. Doesnt matter if you take all the gear or none at all. You still have to put in the work. That's why when you see someone who is in shape you automatically subconsciously have a base level of respect for them because of the consistent discipline they put in to build and maintain their fitness. You automatically respect them just for that alone. 🙂💪
If you're 5'7 and look like a greek god you'll still get mogged by a skinny 6'2 guy.
@@Goatlikeitornot That is so fuckin not true brother
@@CartoonSlug yeah it is
Really? Before I went to the gym, I always thought that men with big arms are like that because of genetics. 😅😅
@@Goatlikeitornot Oh ok
My advice to men is this. Women take themselves really serious and if you take them at face value it's gonna go nowhere. You need to just chill out and don't look to deeply into what they say. All the guys I know who have had big success with girls don't overthink it. If they get turned down they just laugh and move on to the next one. Dating is a numbers game but your not gonna be able to hit those numbers if you obsess over everything the first girl says. I've seen girls give out long demands about what they need in a man and then a guy they find attractive turns up, and that list is thrown out the window in 2mins. Now just imagine if you was sitting there actually taking that girls list seriously lol. And remember we do the same thing. Big fat ugly girl might be willing to do everything we want but we don't want her because we don't fancy her. Well girls are allowed to do the same back. Men are not special. Don't let the first girls comment stop you talking to the next 30.
Good point. Always gotta see if they are thinking logically or emotionally. Focus on the emotional actions.
I’m out of the “meeting” game because of my age. But I advice my middle age single friends “why do you want to meet women”. The trollers I dismiss. If they say to find a wife, I advise them to be realistic and look for only two invaluable factors. 1. Do she share the same values and Faith as you? And 2. Observe everything you can about her financial responsibility. Do not judge her by her family, education, or emotions, unless she displays any kind of abnormal behavior. 😊
I would like someone who just doesn't beat around the bush and says the point straight.
I feel sorry for young people dating. Maybe bring back barn dances! They’re fun!
Dancing has a whole different level of mixed messages and signals when it comes to gauging romantic interest
@gm9460 it's not dancing, it's twerking now lmao 🤦🙄
@@kc270352 Hence, the problems 🙄🙃
Lovely idea
I love dances especially barn dances I've been to one!
Men don’t attract, they pursue. You’re all going about this wrong.
It can be both. If you're a top 10% dude, they'll flock around you. Otherwise, gotta improve your stats and get the best you can!
Thats absolute bs.
Be Gigachadd!
She didn't answer the question, she only outlined the traits a man should have which doesn't mean you'll attract a good woman. Even before this video started I knew you don't ask a fish how to catch a fish but I was still curious as to what she was going to say and her facial expression showed she really didn't have the answer to the question. First define what a good woman is to you, then you find out where women like that would congregate i.e. church, library etc. (not night clubs) then you have to ask certain questions with tact to find out certain character traits, you're looking for certain behaviors etc. does she dress modestly? is she always looking for attention? is she materialistic? does she have kids (which is a major red flag)? is she willing to sign a prenup? does she have a high body count? (this question you'll have to get around to asking later on, there's ways to ask it without being on the nose) etc. etc. You have to be clear on what it is that you want from your woman its going to be different things for different guys then go about finding out whether the women you end up on dates with have what you're looking for. The worst thing a man can do is simp and only focus on looks.
I agree with a lot of this! Don't just go for a pretty face and a girl that is settling. However, it requires a lot of patience. I just posted a video about how Partner Dancing helps so much.
In 4 hours you can dance with like 50 new women. Some you'll become friends with and see again. But the point being, it allows you to be more selective and have a lot more options.
It's not complicated, women are attracted to effort.
If she likes you, she'll cleverly invade your space.
Just say hi and be yourself. If it doesn't feel right, you'll know quick and it was fun, but you may end up with a new friend. win win!
If you don't know how women typically act, it is challenging to know when it is intentional or coincidence.
It's best when you experience a range and multiple reps :)
Feel like this was misleading. She explained how to attract good women but not where to find them
Get your Passport and fly into CRK. THEY ARE EVERYWHERE!!!
Stay single Gentleman 😎
So it seems like commenters here find Brett attractive and so are less likely to scrutinise what she says. Sounds about right for society in general
2:53 "Yeah, well, rightly so..." AHAHAHAHA!
The problem with the whole "Be a leader" kinda thing is that it's kind of paradoxical... not every man can be a leader in every situation (I assume there is always some niche situations where everyone can shine as a leader tho)
Lots of work for little return. I think men understand enough about women at this point, that's why men are tired of the demands and continue to grow.
Improve yourself - internally and externally.
Be a leader
Understand the nuance of dating - go beyond dating. Be able to carry a conversation beyond romantic interests.
BOOM! Exactly
Forget everything she said. Focus on making YOU happy. If you are happy at your 9-5, don’t feel the need to change. If you are happy with your level of fitness, own it. Be confident and comfortable with who YOU are. Because the rest is just vanity, and women who chase that are unreliable and not worth your time. Be who you are and if a woman accepts you for that and wants to be with you, you have a much better chance. Online dating is not the demon people make it out to be. Yes, it’s difficult. There’s lots of rejection. But you are able to put yourself out there in front of 1,000s of women. If you go to a run club you’re going to put yourself in front of like 6 women and 3 of them probably already have bfs/husbands that run with them.
I thought a good relationship was when two personalities get along together happily. None of this be your best self mentality. That's something totally different.
“You learn how to date in college” I literally dropped out in 2018 and went straight to working in a prison 😂😂😂 dude that makes so much sense now
Practically:
Actively do your own things, even apply to ladies too.
Sometimes we can be a little bit lazy, but not too passive that 'expect to have millions of dollars fall from the clouds above as a rain'
Don't try so hard just to please (wo)men, set up your own green & red flags in your standard lists
Honestly, to simplify things in shorter lines: Most couples broke up with each other derives from the very fact that, they are not IN SYNC with the significant other
Most woman from 18 - 40 (1984 - 2006) in America 🇺🇸 don't know what they want when it comes to dating.
Will tell a guy that they are not interested in them. Then when the guy goes away they get there feelings hurt and ask "Why isn't that guy paying me attention anymore!?" You literally just told the guy you are not interested in him, but you want him to stick around to keep getting rejected by you. What guy out there wants to talk , spend time with a girl/woman that isn't interested in them.
I always assume women that want to talk to me are just being nice, I am basically blind to signals due to misreading “signals” so bad in the past. Dating is hard
That’s wild because as a 28 year old girl, you seem very attractive to me
I've been IN PERSON at things hundreds upon hundreds upon hundreds of times and still nothing.
I did the gym for 9 months or so and didn't speak with anyone there, it was just me and my mate. I mean even if a girl did like me or showed a bit of interest then she would've at least have made it known to me in some way, but no. Everyone just sticks to their exercise and earbuds in/headphones on and ignores everyone else there. It's really soulless tbh.
I've been to the same pub (for you US people this is a place similar to a bar but not very big places and where people can just go to relax with friends, play pool and enjoy some music) for like 3 years after COVID to keep it in business. I've had attention from 2 single Moms but they're really not the type of women I'm wanting I'm afraid. I want a woman without kids, if that's too much to ask... Another girl seems to be playing hot and cold and in recent months I haven't been there that much because I've just had too many other things going on, like 4-6 music concerts, a trip to Spain, my work's annual conference which I had to prepare a speech for, family birthdays, including my own, etc.
It's really nowhere near as simple as just being somewhere in person and I'm sorry but people get too anxious these days whenever you try and start a conversation with them. The only sure fire way is having friends with you or knowing a friend of another group who can then be the link between you and the girl you want to talk to. And given how tricky that is, because girls with friend groups who are actually decent are pretty much always going to be able to find a guy without much trouble, it's more about luck and timing about being at a place in person when any said girl just so happens to be single. If you're there a few months early she may not be interested having just got out of a breakup, or a few months late then she's already working on getting to know a new guy. It's all just LUCK
I was going to comment about dating advice but she's absolutely right about pickleball.
To me this stuff has always been obvious. I think most people know what a good, desirable person is, it's just difficult to pursue that ideal. People either don't know how to start, what to do, or they know what they have to do but they're afraid to start because they're afraid of failing or have so much self loathing that they just can't find the motivation to better themselves. The first step before you do anything to make yourself more desirable is to get your head in order. Deal with your demons and find help to better yourself so you aren't just floundering on what to do with yourself. Then you can start improving in other ways without any handicap. Once you're right with yourself you can worry about finding the right one