Who's here now still watching this video on How To Make Him Want To Commit To A Relationship?? If so, hit 'reply' to let me know your thoughts on the video! You can also DM me on insta @makehimyours and come behind the scenes on filming! And don't forget your FREE download via www.makehimyours.com.au/7secrets
Great video, but how do you go about from seeing each other exclusively for a couple of weeks to actually being in a committed relationship? How do you have that conversation?
I really love the second approach. It shows the man that she is not depending on him saying "Yes" to make her happy. She made it clear that she really likes him, but doesn't make a big deal of the topic. "No pressure" He gets the feeling that she will survive without him. It's hard to make this move because when we REALLY like a guy, we don't want to lose them with our words. Even though I'm middle age, I still need A TON of practice in relationships. I was with my ex husband for 15 years and I didn't have any wild dating times before him. I need some practice!! :-)
@scott sanger Sexist and wrong. It is on BOTH. HE HAS TO SUPPORT HER AS WELL AND ALSO HELP COOK CLEAN AND RAISE CHILDREN. HIS CHILDREN. She is the one who carries, gives birth and does the raising. MORE HER CHILDREN.
lol, this is the first time that i see and hear about this tips; 2 years ago i said the exacly words to my actual boyfriend and that was how we get into a relationship. i felt so identified. nice advice.
Hey mark, I want to thank you for all your amazing videos, you are not just helping women get better at relationships, you are also helping us be more confident and take control of what we deserve. I had this conversation with my guy today, he hasn’t replied me yet, but I don’t really care to be honest, I feel so empowered and confident, and I know this is what I deserve! Thank you so much
This is perfect. Really, if you are already sleeping with someone and really like them for a few weeks you should know what you are. I like the no pressure thing. It all makes so much sense.
I just hinted at all this “correct” (2nd video) conversation with the guy I have been sleeping with for the past month (neither of us were really sure what we want as far as relationships when we first met) and he messaged me 6:30am 2 days ago saying he would love to see me and get to know me in a non sexual way lol He said he’d like to take me on a first official date or picnic go shopping or just hang out getting to know each other. I’m sooooo excited. I’m just playing it all cool and calm. 😜😜😜
Mark Rosenfeld thanks Mark. I’ve been watching all your videos and gone back to the start of them, they’ve been realllllly helpful! Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Mark Rosenfeld Mark!! I just had to give you an update. He came over last night, brought over dinner, we played some games on PlayStation and then out of the blue he says so I’d like to do this. I said what’s that? He says be in a relationship with you. I played it cool and said oh ok that sounds good. If that’s what you’d like, I’d like that too. Let’s do it and see how it goes! Then he gave me a big kiss and cuddle and yayyyyy! He really didn’t want a commitment or relationship when we met a month ago! He also used my laptop to delete his online dating profile and I did the same before he left at midnight lol (he had to be up early this morning)
I like how you address what we want to know with the questions but make sure that the woman is still considering her best interests! Plus, you can pull off a pink shirt!! This channel rocks ladies!! 😄👍🌟☺
I did exactly this...and now I'm in some unnamed glorified long distance psudeo friendship. I've considered walking away about 4 times (in 2 months) but we are so compatible and he's so charming, I talked myself out of it! I'm binge watching your videos...hopefully I find more answers!
Lol that first example was awful! And that was me...have been watching your videos and am great with working on me and the two of us our friends. Thank you for reminding me how great I am and importance of working on self.
Great video Mark!! I'm just rolling with it 7.5 months in, haven't had the talk but have been told there is no one else, he's not going anywhere and when he pulls away he will come back to me. Pretty happy with that 😊
Mark Rosenfeld yes from him 🙂. Progressing nicely 👍 I would like to see some vids on how things are different when there are kids involved. Between us there are 5.
That's great. Well you've pretty much had the convo then. That's essentially what it is :) GREAT idea - need to put more focus on the kids topic! Thanks Carolyn.
Thanks Mark for your response! I took some notes and I will talk to "my friend" the right way to convey my intentions for our exclusive relationship...without using this word:) I'm very nervous because he is the guy I want. Thanks again;)
Love your videos! Bookmarking this video lol. Also, there's this guy I've been "talking" to for a couple of month. Everytime we talk on social media he's kind of rude but when we hang out he's really nice. And he barely talks to me now, but his friend told me he likes me but he might just be joking. Most of his friends know who I am apparently. It's been months now and I want to know where he's at because I don't want to waste my time anymore when I can go out and have fun with other people.
Hey Lenore, thanks for commenting. Ok, that's great that you had the convo. You should be really happy with yourself for bringing it up. What this guy is now saying is (like I said in the video) that he's not bothered by the idea of you seeing other men. That's valuable information for you to know, so really be glad you got it. With his interest levels where they are, you no longer need to feel guilty about focusing on other men. If it's good for him, it's good for you. Imagine a man you were dating whom you didn't care if he saw other women? How high are you interest levels for that guy? This is valuable information so that you can stop wasting time hoping.
Mark Rosenfeld , thank you for your reply. he said he did care if I were to see other guys, but that he can't control me. he said he didn't know what he was doing right now with his life, isn't trying to sleep with other women, doesn't want a relationship but still wants to see me. for 4 months I've been doing girlfriend things for him. I might still see him but I'm going to stop doing the extra things I was doing for him and I'm going to start seeing other guys.
Yeh, and this is the thing. He can't have his cake and eat it too. If you let him (I'll be exclusive and act the GF without actually being one), he will take it, but that's already been happening for 4 months and it hasn't made you all that happy. He's right though, so if he's genuinely saying that he's in no position to be in a relationship, then right now he's incompatible with you. This is a good thing to know. That means you will have to take your feelings back and protect yourself, putting the focus back onto other activities and people. It could be a few days before he decides he's ready for a relationship, it could be a lifetime. You just don't know, but you can't hang around forever hoping. Agree with your plan 100%.
Lenore Brown omg this sounds just like my ex!! Might be the same guy lol. "I wouldn't like other men to be with you but I can't control it" just completely putting it all on me when HE was the one that couldn't commit. I just kept hoping and hoping because he played this saint victim role and I felt like I had to do something about it!!! Should have just quickly forgotten about it but I'm easily manipulated
Hey Mark, I'm only just new to the channel, but I've been loving your vids. Perhaps your Aussie nature/culture has to do with it (i'm Aussie too), but your vids just seem to click with me. For once I feel like I'm actually listening to someone smart, haha. You definitely know what you're doing and your tips and tricks have been helping me out SO much and are actually giving me an awesome positive mindset! The past few days I've found myself not worrying as much, and if I start to worry I actually just remember a few things you have said in your vids. My boyfriend has given me nothing to worry about but I still tend to nonsense worry. These vids have given me the confidence I feel like I deserve, thanks dude!
Hey Sydney, great to have you on here. Ahahahah thankyou. I don't talk about this on the channel at all but I'm actually a qualified veterinarian (who knew?) so hopefully I got some brains from studying all that in my early 20's, heh. That's actually the loveliest complement. You made my day
Absolutely love this video ... Your dramatic reply is so funny because it's exactly what happens ...... I can just see myself saying those exact same words .... only found your videos about 3 days now but loving ..All Thank u
As usual so well put and so professional but very real and comfortable learning and watching! Your Style of speaking so easily to your Auduence is truly beautiful! Thank You...even though not in a relationship, Wow am I learning from a great Teacher who is SO real and comfortable speaking! 👌💞
Mark Rosenfeld ?, I’m doing well thank you. It’s a long story as to why and when I chose to ask that to him. And I wasn’t really that surprised at the answer he gave me. I hope you are doing well 🤗😉
Ok well in the first approach she was too much in "attack/ accuse" mode, which instantly puts a guy into defense mode and at that point the rest is a lost cause. But in the second act, she is giving off too much of the, "I don't care vibe", which can equally cause a guy to doubt any real feelings that he does have as he will wonder why she doesn't care if he is wanting to still see other women and is "ok" with it, because if a guy I was seeing was ok with me seeing other guys then I would instantly know he didn't care about me or he would be a little jealous and a little possessive (not the fatal attraction kind) but he wouldn't like it and wouldn't want it. I think people with open relationships just don't have that profound love and connection between them that makes everyone else fade into the background. In a sense they are filling the space but still looking for "The One" I think a better approach would be to say, "Mark, we have been seeing each other for three months and it's been great and I feel so close to you and feel like we have a great relationship. People have been asking me if we are "exclusive" and to be honest I don't know how to answer that question. For my part, I have not been seeing any other guys, but I don't know if you have been keeping your options open and still seeing other women, so I would like to know if you have and if you want us to be an exclusive couple so that I know weather or not I should be keeping my options open and dating other men." If you don't feel comfortable having this conversation with a guy then he's the wrong guy.
This is great because I may have to have this conversation soon. My ex is trying to get close to me again. He lives in SC but use to live in PA where I am. He's been hinting saying he misses Philly and is coming up to visit soon. We've been talking and video chatting on the phone for a few months now and he says he misses me. I'm not ready to start a physical relationship with him at this time so we'll see. I'm not sure how I'll feel until I'm around him spending time person to person.
@@jermiaturner1961 Oh, thanks for replying. You two are so comfortable and silly with each other I would have thought you were related...like cousins or something. Haha. Keep up the awesome work!
I could not stop laughing....this is a great learning tool and I have made some of the same mistakes she did first, but not as dramatic......this was great Mark
He looked and acted very confused in both approaches! The 1st one was pushy and controlling, and the 2nd one was manipulating. He wasn't thrilled in either one.
I'm addicted Mark I'm on a Make him yours Marathon right now. You know Mark I appreciate what I've learned from you , I've been soooooo lost before you showed me some light. Thank you. Maybe if I could have a little more,..it would be more time and information on some steps to take to assist in extracting one's self from the RUT. I so hate this but how did I end up in all your videos and in the do not do it this way. Now what Mark? Any thoughts?
Absolutely love your style and advice! I've subscribed and will watch together with my single daughter (mom needs these tips too - lol) And while on the subject, if you haven't done so already (I'm a new subbie) please do videos on dating tips for us more "mature" gals re-entering the dating scene in a "snapchat" world! (with men her age and "younger ones" too!) oooh! ;)
Hey What's Up NY - thanks so much. Great to have you on the channel! I'll definitely look at doing more videos like this, and will also mention some tips in the Live Stream on Tuesday relating to this! (6PM LA 9PM NY). Mark
First step: he has to really want to be in a commitment and be willing to put in the effort to make it happen! Second step: be that amazing woman that makes him want to commit Third step: dont expect anything back
I love these videos!!! They are great! This is really awesome. I think this was absolutely brilliant. The way she framed it in the second video was so good. Would this still work if he's already told you he doesn't want a serious relationship with you?? I have stayed in no contact since we saw each other and when he unexpectedly told me that. His actions were otherwise that he were really into me and the chemistry was off the charts. We had been dating for a couple of months so it is hard to hear this as I grew very strong feelings for him.
Hey! Absolutely love your videos.New subbie here. This question is not related to the video but I thought I'd ask anyway (I love the fact that you reply to each and every comment) :) Okay here goes. I'm 24 years old, working in a foreign country. I joined a networking site for expats about 3 months ago just to meet other expats and possibly make new friends as there isn't much of a social life here. About 2 months ago, this guy sent me a text on the site and we started chatting. I didn't expect it to go on for as long as it has or even go beyond the usual ""where are you from? what are you doing here". Somehow we've kept chatting ever since about everything.from politics to sports to our families and our cultures (we are from very different backgrounds). .. even when he went back home for the holidays, he kept in touch.. which I didn't expect. We' met when he got back and have hang out a couple of times ever since. The more we talk and meet, the more interested in him I get. I'm attracted to his gentle soul, his humility and the way he has his life together in so many ways... gives me a lot to admire and look forward to for my own life. BUT. He is way older than me. 18 years older to be exact. No kids, never been married. Am I crazy for even considering dating him? We haven't gone in that direction at all but I can tell he likes me and if we keep on talking and meeting as much as we are, sth is definitely going to happen.The age difference doesn't really bother me personally but I'd like to hear another opinion on this. Should I stop this before it even begins? Or should I just go for it?
Hey Tulip - thanks so much for writing in! Great to have you as a new sub. Great question. How old are you right now? (if you don't mind me asking). The statistics for age gaps that big definitely aren't pretty: "A five-year age gap statistically means you’re 18 percent more likely to divorce (versus just 3 percent with a 1-year age difference), and that rate rises to 39 percent for a 10-year age difference and 95 percent for a 20-year age gap." which is something major to keep in mind. The thing with age gaps is, because of the different life experience, it adds to a lot of incompatibilities that same age couples don't face. The older gets frustrated at the younger because he feels he can constantly 'advise' her, while she resents him for being a father figure rather than a husband. She wants to be out having spontaneous fun and dates, he wants to relax. She wants kids, he doesn't want anymore. Older sperm also means higher risk of things like autism in kids which can put additional stress on the relationship. A near 95% divorce rate doesn't bode well (not that you're getting married or anything, but you're also suggesting moving things forward). So it depends if you want to chance the odds or take a logical (smarter??) approach. I can say this... if you do go ahead, I'd be doing a lot of research into the REASONS couple with those sorts of age gaps constantly break up and keeping them in very close mind and getting a vibe as to whether those problems are likely to come up with him and his personality.
Hey Mary, so he said he doesn't want to be exclusive? If that's so I'd be downgrading his importance to some degree and making an effort to date some other men. Especially if you've been seeing him a while.
I love your videos How about your talking to someone..they already say your dating them ..and they ended up saying your his girlfriend.. I mean we been seeing eachother and talking for 2 months now .. so is this good .. we have amazing chemistry and he calls me his baby every day now.. I love all your videos.. very great informative
Why do I always end up being the side person and not the actual girlfriend? How come I'm always good enough to hang out with or hook up with but not good enough to be the girlfriend?
I am wondering how to let a guy know that I have other options (I mean other men adore me, want to date me etc.) in a way that he won't think I am trying to make him jealous on purpose?
A lot of the time, really a man is going to (and should) see this naturally. Not just in the way men respond to you and how you interact when he's around you, but also the type of woman you are and how attractive he knows you must be to the other gender. In terms of verbally, what about the way Jermia does it in this video works Catie?
Well, in a long distance he can't really see. He is there and there are here are at least 5 guys who want to date me, but he doesn't know about that. How men see this kind of objective attractiveness to another gender? If he's attracted to me can he despite that think that I'm not attractive generally?
I think he would. I think he'd get a vibe for that. You're obviously high value and he can see that. I'm sure you're going out with your friends and telling him about your nights out, things you do etc... and all the people you meet at these. He'll know you're an attractive girl who's around a lot of attractive, single guys on a regular basis. No, if he finds you attractive, he'll be able to perceive threats - real or imagined - from other males.
Thanks Mark! Your videos, texts and comments helped me a lot. Any time I watch a video by another couch (YT suggestions) I always think like nah, Mark is better. He booked the ticket! He's going to be here for 4 days. Kinda short, but probably reasonable as for the second date? Keep fingers crossed, pls! Although actually I'm not sure yet if he's the Mr Right.
Wowow - so keen to hear how this goes! Well I'd hope you wouldn't be sure after 1 date Catie - That's something that will take you months/years to figure out.
Tried it myself with almost the exactly same lines, didn't even bring up being exclusive. His answer was.. "I'm sorry, you mean if I'm dating? If so, I'm not. It's up to you, if you want to meet up with them." 😑🤦♀️
So he is pretty happy having you seeing others? Cool, so sounds like he wants to keep things casual. Otherwise if you really like him you can ask if he'd like to commit to staying that way, without a label etc... Sounds like it went well to me??
We're living in different countries, been keeping in touch regularly for over a year and plan a trip together in October. So I guess he doesn't want any commitment and enjoy the casual/unlabeled type since we're so far apart. Though I've recently found out that he did some trips with another girl as well during the past months and I just want to find out where he stands and what his feeling to what we have. Mark Rosenfeld Thanks for your reply! 💜
He's in a different country, is not committed to you and is going on trips with other women so I have to wonder why are you wasting your time and energy on someone so unavailable? Some people seek out others who are unavailable when some part of them feels like they do not want to get too close to someone for various reasons and perhaps you need to consider if you are unavailable on some deeper level and what you are getting out of this. I think you should not waste your time and energy on what is likely a dead end and instead look around you at all the men who are actually available to you. Just my two cents worth.
Your point is totally valid, thanks for your comment. I am taken some time and energy out of this non-labelled thing with him, focusing on other things in life is much better these days. Thanks again.
What does it mean when a guy claims that he is not seeing/talking to other women (essentially telling you he is being exclusive) yet says he doesn't like labels/doesn't want a relationship (even when you are not asking straight up for a relationship)?
Who's here now still watching this video on How To Make Him Want To Commit To A Relationship?? If so, hit 'reply' to let me know your thoughts on the video! You can also DM me on insta @makehimyours and come behind the scenes on filming! And don't forget your FREE download via www.makehimyours.com.au/7secrets
🙋♀️
I'm here.
I'm here mark thank u 😊 very helpful videos
I am and oh dear lord I’ve done the wrong way a few times 😳😭😂 I needed this!
Great video, but how do you go about from seeing each other exclusively for a couple of weeks to actually being in a committed relationship? How do you have that conversation?
Lol I used this technique and he committed on the spot. Thank u
OMG that's awesome Angela :) x
*To love is nothing. To be loved is something. But to love and be loved, that's everything* 🥰
We can try for 2 weeks 😂😂 what's that, a free spotify trial?
Megi W piegi 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
🤣🤣🤣 yeah I’m not doing that. He wants me or not. If I’m confused after 2 months.
👋 goodbye
Spotify at least plays the songs I like.
Hahahaha she's really funny 😂love your videos 👌🏻👏🏻
LMAOOOOOO
I really love the second approach. It shows the man that she is not depending on him saying "Yes" to make her happy. She made it clear that she really likes him, but doesn't make a big deal of the topic. "No pressure" He gets the feeling that she will survive without him. It's hard to make this move because when we REALLY like a guy, we don't want to lose them with our words. Even though I'm middle age, I still need A TON of practice in relationships. I was with my ex husband for 15 years and I didn't have any wild dating times before him. I need some practice!! :-)
Thanks Denise!! I love this video so much! And dating and especially relationships is something ALL of us can get better at - at ANY age.
@scott sanger Sexist and wrong. It is on BOTH. HE HAS TO SUPPORT HER AS WELL AND ALSO HELP COOK CLEAN AND RAISE CHILDREN. HIS CHILDREN. She is the one who carries, gives birth and does the raising. MORE HER CHILDREN.
lol, this is the first time that i see and hear about this tips; 2 years ago i said the exacly words to my actual boyfriend and that was how we get into a relationship. i felt so identified. nice advice.
Thanks Elizabeth - appreciate you watching and commenting
Hey mark, I want to thank you for all your amazing videos, you are not just helping women get better at relationships, you are also helping us be more confident and take control of what we deserve. I had this conversation with my guy today, he hasn’t replied me yet, but I don’t really care to be honest, I feel so empowered and confident, and I know this is what I deserve! Thank you so much
LMAO I LITERALLY CHOKED WHEN SHE STARTED WAILING
Hahahah - glad you enjoyed the video, Chris. Love it!!
I bursted out laughing 😂
She should win an Emmy! That was a great escalation of freaking out.
Love jemiahs blonde hair change! You two are such good actors... love the bloopers!
This is perfect. Really, if you are already sleeping with someone and really like them for a few weeks you should know what you are. I like the no pressure thing. It all makes so much sense.
Who else fancies Mark!? #Gorg
Dawwww. Shanks
Mee
Hayfer He's freaking beautiful inside and out and that's wicked awesomeness
MindWideOpen very beautiful and very caring guy I can tell
Me he my kind of guy 💖
I just hinted at all this “correct” (2nd video) conversation with the guy I have been sleeping with for the past month (neither of us were really sure what we want as far as relationships when we first met) and he messaged me 6:30am 2 days ago saying he would love to see me and get to know me in a non sexual way lol He said he’d like to take me on a first official date or picnic go shopping or just hang out getting to know each other. I’m sooooo excited. I’m just playing it all cool and calm. 😜😜😜
That's amazing Lizzy! Keep it cool, keep assessing HIM with your standards and good luck to the two of you!
Mark Rosenfeld thanks Mark. I’ve been watching all your videos and gone back to the start of them, they’ve been realllllly helpful! Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Mark Rosenfeld Mark!! I just had to give you an update. He came over last night, brought over dinner, we played some games on PlayStation and then out of the blue he says so I’d like to do this. I said what’s that? He says be in a relationship with you. I played it cool and said oh ok that sounds good. If that’s what you’d like, I’d like that too. Let’s do it and see how it goes! Then he gave me a big kiss and cuddle and yayyyyy! He really didn’t want a commitment or relationship when we met a month ago! He also used my laptop to delete his online dating profile and I did the same before he left at midnight lol (he had to be up early this morning)
Mark Rosenfeld thank you thank you it’s partly because of your videos and tips and help thank you
I tried this EXACTLY. He said "oh no, I want to be with you. I want to pursue a relationship with you". A year later he said I "pressured him". 😂 😂
I like how you address what we want to know with the questions but make sure that the woman is still considering her best interests! Plus, you can pull off a pink shirt!! This channel rocks ladies!! 😄👍🌟☺
Always appreciate your beautiful comments, Vamp - such a supporter! Glad you're on the channel xx
I did exactly this...and now I'm in some unnamed glorified long distance psudeo friendship. I've considered walking away about 4 times (in 2 months) but we are so compatible and he's so charming, I talked myself out of it! I'm binge watching your videos...hopefully I find more answers!
I am Lita Wi Girl, dump him!
Haha! I love when you have Jamia (hope I spelt it right) in your videos! she'sa great actress. Brilliant video thank you both xxx
Great video! I like that you mentioned to check in with yourself first because this is not the best next step in every case.
Lol that first example was awful! And that was me...have been watching your videos and am great with working on me and the two of us our friends. Thank you for reminding me how great I am and importance of working on self.
Hahaha my pleasure. Thankyou Chula
Whoa Jermia!! Rockin the blonde babe!! Totesfab. Mark still looking beautiful as always 😍
Ahahaha Totesfab
I reckon I bring it back hahah.
Great video Mark!! I'm just rolling with it 7.5 months in, haven't had the talk but have been told there is no one else, he's not going anywhere and when he pulls away he will come back to me. Pretty happy with that 😊
Oh Wonderful Carolyn - so good to hear it's going well. Told by him you mean??
Mark Rosenfeld yes from him 🙂. Progressing nicely 👍 I would like to see some vids on how things are different when there are kids involved. Between us there are 5.
That's great. Well you've pretty much had the convo then. That's essentially what it is :)
GREAT idea - need to put more focus on the kids topic! Thanks Carolyn.
He says things like "our" and "we" and I'm like 😍 , but in my head like( don't play with me) lol great vid mark thanks!
Hahahah arw thanks aheard xx
Okay, I have decided, I am not the problem with my past bad relationships. Thank you!
Thanks Mark for your response!
I took some notes and I will talk to "my friend" the right way to convey my intentions for our exclusive relationship...without using this word:) I'm very nervous because he is the guy I want. Thanks again;)
Good luck Corina - let me know how it goes I'm curious xx
Love your videos! Bookmarking this video lol. Also, there's this guy I've been "talking" to for a couple of month. Everytime we talk on social media he's kind of rude but when we hang out he's really nice. And he barely talks to me now, but his friend told me he likes me but he might just be joking. Most of his friends know who I am apparently. It's been months now and I want to know where he's at because I don't want to waste my time anymore when I can go out and have fun with other people.
Ahhh wish I had this two weeks ago! Saving this for future reference!
Plenty of time and men ahead for you Angela - some women go through their whole dating life never knowing this stuff!
Mark Rosenfeld my boyfriend cheated on me with his ex and he loves me and her:(
Angela Lim same here!
This is awesome! I've been trying to figure out how to have the commitment to convo.
he said "exclusive is just another word for a relationship. do whatever you want. why can't things just stay how they are now?"
Hey Lenore, thanks for commenting. Ok, that's great that you had the convo. You should be really happy with yourself for bringing it up.
What this guy is now saying is (like I said in the video) that he's not bothered by the idea of you seeing other men. That's valuable information for you to know, so really be glad you got it. With his interest levels where they are, you no longer need to feel guilty about focusing on other men. If it's good for him, it's good for you.
Imagine a man you were dating whom you didn't care if he saw other women? How high are you interest levels for that guy? This is valuable information so that you can stop wasting time hoping.
Mark Rosenfeld , thank you for your reply.
he said he did care if I were to see other guys, but that he can't control me. he said he didn't know what he was doing right now with his life, isn't trying to sleep with other women, doesn't want a relationship but still wants to see me.
for 4 months I've been doing girlfriend things for him. I might still see him but I'm going to stop doing the extra things I was doing for him and I'm going to start seeing other guys.
Yeh, and this is the thing. He can't have his cake and eat it too. If you let him (I'll be exclusive and act the GF without actually being one), he will take it, but that's already been happening for 4 months and it hasn't made you all that happy. He's right though, so if he's genuinely saying that he's in no position to be in a relationship, then right now he's incompatible with you. This is a good thing to know. That means you will have to take your feelings back and protect yourself, putting the focus back onto other activities and people. It could be a few days before he decides he's ready for a relationship, it could be a lifetime. You just don't know, but you can't hang around forever hoping. Agree with your plan 100%.
Lenore Brown omg this sounds just like my ex!! Might be the same guy lol. "I wouldn't like other men to be with you but I can't control it" just completely putting it all on me when HE was the one that couldn't commit. I just kept hoping and hoping because he played this saint victim role and I felt like I had to do something about it!!! Should have just quickly forgotten about it but I'm easily manipulated
Hey Mark, I'm only just new to the channel, but I've been loving your vids. Perhaps your Aussie nature/culture has to do with it (i'm Aussie too), but your vids just seem to click with me. For once I feel like I'm actually listening to someone smart, haha. You definitely know what you're doing and your tips and tricks have been helping me out SO much and are actually giving me an awesome positive mindset! The past few days I've found myself not worrying as much, and if I start to worry I actually just remember a few things you have said in your vids. My boyfriend has given me nothing to worry about but I still tend to nonsense worry. These vids have given me the confidence I feel like I deserve, thanks dude!
Hey Sydney, great to have you on here. Ahahahah thankyou. I don't talk about this on the channel at all but I'm actually a qualified veterinarian (who knew?) so hopefully I got some brains from studying all that in my early 20's, heh.
That's actually the loveliest complement. You made my day
your face expression is priceless
Ahahaha glad you enjoyed!!
Absolutely love this video ... Your dramatic reply is so funny because it's exactly what happens ...... I can just see myself saying those exact same words .... only found your videos about 3 days now but loving ..All Thank u
Hey Renee - aha glad you enjoyed it!! Thanks for commenting
Guilt of the first conversation ending with the dog comment 🤦🏾♂️
As usual so well put and so professional but very real and comfortable learning and watching! Your Style of speaking so easily to your Auduence is truly beautiful! Thank You...even though not in a relationship, Wow am I learning from a great Teacher who is SO real and comfortable speaking! 👌💞
Arrrrrw thankyou Silke!!
Thank you for the great info,but also for the laugh.Jermia is amazing 😂
Glad you liked it Claudia Claudia xx
Awwww, hahaha! Thank you Claudia!
Mark, thank you for the video as as it’s easier to see the points by what the girl said exactly.
Hahahaha she's really funny 😂love your videos 👌🏻👏🏻
She's great! More to come Julie
Looking forward to them 😁
Awwww, thanks Julie!
@@jermiaturner1961 You are absolutely preeewty × hella hilarious.
So great to see the scenarios. It really helps :) Thank you Mark and Thank you Jermia !
Thanks Nat! What else would you like to see Demo'd?
You're welcome Nat! Hope you enjoyed :)
I LOVEEEE Jemiah 😂😍
Hilarious! The blind side has me laughing still - nice acting on both renditions 💕
I'm from Peru i watch all your videos 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
Arw how lovely. Thanks cutegirl!
The scene is cool. Love it Mark.. 💯❤
Thanks Belle! Yep, it's a great example of how to have this conversation smoothly :)
happy to find you Mark! thanks for giving us some guide. love you now! haha
Ahahaha great to have you on my channel gracious!
Mark Rosenfeld 😄😙
So after three years I tried this and it backfired on me today.At least I tried. Love your advice
Arw, I hope you're doing well right now. Thanks for watching and commenting Jamie xx
Mark Rosenfeld ?, I’m doing well thank you. It’s a long story as to why and when I chose to ask that to him. And I wasn’t really that surprised at the answer he gave me. I hope you are doing well 🤗😉
Ok well in the first approach she was too much in "attack/ accuse" mode, which instantly puts a guy into defense mode and at that point the rest is a lost cause. But in the second act, she is giving off too much of the, "I don't care vibe", which can equally cause a guy to doubt any real feelings that he does have as he will wonder why she doesn't care if he is wanting to still see other women and is "ok" with it, because if a guy I was seeing was ok with me seeing other guys then I would instantly know he didn't care about me or he would be a little jealous and a little possessive (not the fatal attraction kind) but he wouldn't like it and wouldn't want it. I think people with open relationships just don't have that profound love and connection between them that makes everyone else fade into the background. In a sense they are filling the space but still looking for "The One" I think a better approach would be to say, "Mark, we have been seeing each other for three months and it's been great and I feel so close to you and feel like we have a great relationship. People have been asking me if we are "exclusive" and to be honest I don't know how to answer that question. For my part, I have not been seeing any other guys, but I don't know if you have been keeping your options open and still seeing other women, so I would like to know if you have and if you want us to be an exclusive couple so that I know weather or not I should be keeping my options open and dating other men." If you don't feel comfortable having this conversation with a guy then he's the wrong guy.
omg, this is brilliant, lol, i had no idea i have been doing it wrong.
Glad you enjoyed it Tian :) Don't pressure the guy - let him sell himself x
i won't, I promise,thank you.
Fantastic information again, thank you so much, so clear and exact. Jameah is so cute! 😄
Thanks MissJaneyC - really glad you enjoyed the video and got a lot out of it :)
haha awww, thank you :)
This is great because I may have to have this conversation soon. My ex is trying to get close to me again. He lives in SC but use to live in PA where I am. He's been hinting saying he misses Philly and is coming up to visit soon. We've been talking and video chatting on the phone for a few months now and he says he misses me. I'm not ready to start a physical relationship with him at this time so we'll see. I'm not sure how I'll feel until I'm around him spending time person to person.
That's great Luulips. Play it by ear, keep your wits about you and see how things feel once you're in person together. Hope it goes well for you!
This was really good! I love it! I would appreciate it if you could make a video on how to keep the emotionl attraction in a relationship :)
Hey Sandra - thanks so much. That's a great topic. Will add it to the pile
I don't know who Jermia is to you, but I LOVE the two of you together. You guys are so funny!!
We're just friends :) Thank you so much! x
@@jermiaturner1961 Oh, thanks for replying. You two are so comfortable and silly with each other I would have thought you were related...like cousins or something. Haha. Keep up the awesome work!
You got this in the bag! Sent from UK
I could not stop laughing....this is a great learning tool and I have made some of the same mistakes she did first, but not as dramatic......this was great Mark
Glad you enjoyed, D R! 😂 Thank you for watching and for the lovely comment! x
Totally awesome explaination I must say. So many wisdom for us ladies out there in this modern dating world
THAT was truly brilliant. I am impressed.
He looked and acted very confused in both approaches! The 1st one was pushy and controlling, and the 2nd one was manipulating. He wasn't thrilled in either one.
I'm addicted Mark I'm on a Make him yours Marathon right now. You know Mark I appreciate what I've learned from you , I've been soooooo lost before you showed me some light. Thank you. Maybe if I could have a little more,..it would be more time and information on some steps to take to assist in extracting one's self from the RUT. I so hate this but how did I end up in all your videos and in the do not do it this way. Now what Mark? Any thoughts?
wish I could have seen this video few months ago..I did exactly what I wasn't supposed to do. lucky me, he did not run away..
Greeeeeeeeeeeeeat to hear Alexandra. Nice to know that so called dating 'mistakes' aren't always so costly!
Mark Rosenfeld thank you for the reply, Mark. So sweet of you. 😌
The dramatic music is hilarious 😂
I have been doing what you say mark but it seem to put some man off you are great mark
The demo technique is best
Good plan to ask a trial
I wish that I have watched this video before.. I did exactly like the first scenario! 😭
After watching this I think I don't want to commit to him yet...
That's actually likely to be a really healthy way to look at things Natsumo - always good to ask that question too
Like the blonde hair but she looks awesome as a brunette
Hahah thank you! I'm back to Brunette now. I was only blonde for a little while for a role. But thank you!
very good tips Mark 👍👍
Thanks so much Dee - been getting awesome feedback from women having success with this video!
Absolutely love your style and advice! I've subscribed and will watch together with my single daughter (mom needs these tips too - lol)
And while on the subject, if you haven't done so already (I'm a new subbie) please do videos on dating tips for us more "mature" gals re-entering the dating scene in a "snapchat" world! (with men her age and "younger ones" too!) oooh! ;)
Hey What's Up NY - thanks so much. Great to have you on the channel!
I'll definitely look at doing more videos like this, and will also mention some tips in the Live Stream on Tuesday relating to this! (6PM LA 9PM NY).
Mark
Love your videos
Wish all guys were like you
Looks awesome..love it!thank you.
Cheers David!
😂😁😀😃😄😅 This is HILARIOUS, ESPECIALLY the intro! 😁😂😀😃😄😅
Love your voice and accent thanks for helping me!
oh jamia is awesome! thanks mark
Isn't she great? Farkin hell.
Awwwwww you're too lovely! Thank you!
This is an eye opener for us all.
Glad you got something from the video, Janey. Thanks for watching!
I did notice mark first clip at back of your room was no cage then in the 2 clip your dog cage was there under the stars 🐕
I really loved the way you did the opening speech 👌👌
Arw thanks so much Namutebi - really appreciate it. x
First step: he has to really want to be in a commitment and be willing to put in the effort to make it happen!
Second step: be that amazing woman that makes him want to commit
Third step: dont expect anything back
5:49 is pure gold. lol
Cute right? ;)
This was gold. Thank you.
You're welcome Ann. Thank you for watching - really glad you liked the video. x
I love these videos!!! They are great! This is really awesome. I think this was absolutely brilliant. The way she framed it in the second video was so good. Would this still work if he's already told you he doesn't want a serious relationship with you?? I have stayed in no contact since we saw each other and when he unexpectedly told me that. His actions were otherwise that he were really into me and the chemistry was off the charts. We had been dating for a couple of months so it is hard to hear this as I grew very strong feelings for him.
This really nice I now know the difference
Thanks heaps Brenda
Hey! Absolutely love your videos.New subbie here. This question is not related to the video but I thought I'd ask anyway (I love the fact that you reply to each and every comment) :) Okay here goes.
I'm 24 years old, working in a foreign country. I joined a networking site for expats about 3 months ago just to meet other expats and possibly make new friends as there isn't much of a social life here. About 2 months ago, this guy sent me a text on the site and we started chatting. I didn't expect it to go on for as long as it has or even go beyond the usual ""where are you from? what are you doing here". Somehow we've kept chatting ever since about everything.from politics to sports to our families and our cultures (we are from very different backgrounds). .. even when he went back home for the holidays, he kept in touch.. which I didn't expect. We' met when he got back and have hang out a couple of times ever since. The more we talk and meet, the more interested in him I get. I'm attracted to his gentle soul, his humility and the way he has his life together in so many ways... gives me a lot to admire and look forward to for my own life.
BUT. He is way older than me. 18 years older to be exact. No kids, never been married. Am I crazy for even considering dating him? We haven't gone in that direction at all but I can tell he likes me and if we keep on talking and meeting as much as we are, sth is definitely going to happen.The age difference doesn't really bother me personally but I'd like to hear another opinion on this. Should I stop this before it even begins? Or should I just go for it?
Hey Tulip - thanks so much for writing in! Great to have you as a new sub.
Great question. How old are you right now? (if you don't mind me asking).
The statistics for age gaps that big definitely aren't pretty: "A five-year age gap statistically means you’re 18 percent more likely to divorce (versus just 3 percent with a 1-year age difference), and that rate rises to 39 percent for a 10-year age difference and 95 percent for a 20-year age gap." which is something major to keep in mind.
The thing with age gaps is, because of the different life experience, it adds to a lot of incompatibilities that same age couples don't face. The older gets frustrated at the younger because he feels he can constantly 'advise' her, while she resents him for being a father figure rather than a husband. She wants to be out having spontaneous fun and dates, he wants to relax. She wants kids, he doesn't want anymore. Older sperm also means higher risk of things like autism in kids which can put additional stress on the relationship.
A near 95% divorce rate doesn't bode well (not that you're getting married or anything, but you're also suggesting moving things forward). So it depends if you want to chance the odds or take a logical (smarter??) approach. I can say this... if you do go ahead, I'd be doing a lot of research into the REASONS couple with those sorts of age gaps constantly break up and keeping them in very close mind and getting a vibe as to whether those problems are likely to come up with him and his personality.
The BLONDE actress in the first scene was HILARIOUS!!!! OMGOSH!!! 💗💖💕💓❤💙💚💛💜💝💞💟❣💌💫💥💘
It's so weird seeing myself with long blonde hair! It feels like to long ago! But thank you so much Natalia!
Jermia Turner LOL!!! 😂🤣😁😀
LOVE YOUR VIDEO AND ALSO U :-))))
Great way to explain your point. Thanks. 💚
Yayyy..! Awesome Mark..thank you...
After asking myself those 3 questions idk if i wanna sacrifice my single life
Cute:) Good stuff..thanks
He said he doesn't want me to see other guys but doesn't want him to hold me back either.
Hey Mary, so he said he doesn't want to be exclusive?
If that's so I'd be downgrading his importance to some degree and making an effort to date some other men.
Especially if you've been seeing him a while.
+Mark Rosenfeld well yeah u r probably right!!
Thanks for your advice this is so good 👍
I love your videos
How about your talking to someone..they already say your dating them ..and they ended up saying your his girlfriend.. I mean we been seeing eachother and talking for 2 months now .. so is this good .. we have amazing chemistry and he calls me his baby every day now..
I love all your videos.. very great informative
That's good Olivia! As long as you're happy with that arrangement haha. Thankyou :)
Love it!
Cheers Bianca
This colore and shirt is so fit on u
Why do I always end up being the side person and not the actual girlfriend? How come I'm always good enough to hang out with or hook up with but not good enough to be the girlfriend?
The hell yall need that push for . He came to me and now im ready he wanna take his timeee ughh
I am wondering how to let a guy know that I have other options (I mean other men adore me, want to date me etc.) in a way that he won't think I am trying to make him jealous on purpose?
A lot of the time, really a man is going to (and should) see this naturally. Not just in the way men respond to you and how you interact when he's around you, but also the type of woman you are and how attractive he knows you must be to the other gender.
In terms of verbally, what about the way Jermia does it in this video works Catie?
Well, in a long distance he can't really see. He is there and there are here are at least 5 guys who want to date me, but he doesn't know about that.
How men see this kind of objective attractiveness to another gender?
If he's attracted to me can he despite that think that I'm not attractive generally?
I think he would. I think he'd get a vibe for that. You're obviously high value and he can see that. I'm sure you're going out with your friends and telling him about your nights out, things you do etc... and all the people you meet at these. He'll know you're an attractive girl who's around a lot of attractive, single guys on a regular basis.
No, if he finds you attractive, he'll be able to perceive threats - real or imagined - from other males.
Thanks Mark! Your videos, texts and comments helped me a lot. Any time I watch a video by another couch (YT suggestions) I always think like nah, Mark is better.
He booked the ticket! He's going to be here for 4 days. Kinda short, but probably reasonable as for the second date?
Keep fingers crossed, pls!
Although actually I'm not sure yet if he's the Mr Right.
Wowow - so keen to hear how this goes!
Well I'd hope you wouldn't be sure after 1 date Catie - That's something that will take you months/years to figure out.
Thank you I like you guys
I made a very strong good impression on him
Nice Emily! What happened?
Love every word thank you very much
My pleasure Rachael, thanks for watching xx
Tried it myself with almost the exactly same lines, didn't even bring up being exclusive.
His answer was..
"I'm sorry, you mean if I'm dating? If so, I'm not. It's up to you, if you want to meet up with them." 😑🤦♀️
So he is pretty happy having you seeing others? Cool, so sounds like he wants to keep things casual. Otherwise if you really like him you can ask if he'd like to commit to staying that way, without a label etc... Sounds like it went well to me??
We're living in different countries, been keeping in touch regularly for over a year and plan a trip together in October. So I guess he doesn't want any commitment and enjoy the casual/unlabeled type since we're so far apart. Though I've recently found out that he did some trips with another girl as well during the past months and I just want to find out where he stands and what his feeling to what we have. Mark Rosenfeld Thanks for your reply! 💜
He's in a different country, is not committed to you and is going on trips with other women so I have to wonder why are you wasting your time and energy on someone so unavailable? Some people seek out others who are unavailable when some part of them feels like they do not want to get too close to someone for various reasons and perhaps you need to consider if you are unavailable on some deeper level and what you are getting out of this. I think you should not waste your time and energy on what is likely a dead end and instead look around you at all the men who are actually available to you. Just my two cents worth.
Your point is totally valid, thanks for your comment. I am taken some time and energy out of this non-labelled thing with him, focusing on other things in life is much better these days. Thanks again.
Excellent.
Poor Mark, hahahaha, acted really innocent~
Such a fun video! 😁
Glad you enjoyed it, Ju! Thanks for watching. x
What does it mean when a guy claims that he is not seeing/talking to other women (essentially telling you he is being exclusive) yet says he doesn't like labels/doesn't want a relationship (even when you are not asking straight up for a relationship)?
Hey Math - I'll put this on Ask Mark later this week. Great question!
Math I've changed my mind and am actually going to do an entire video for you on this! It will take some time before it's released though.
What an honor! I'll be keeping an eye out for it. In case you refer to me in the video, my name is Margarita