How to get banned from a wedding - REACTION
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ก.ย. 2024
- How to get banned from a wedding - REACTION
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Hey guys, it's Charlotte Dobre here, and in today's video, we're going to talk about some people who got banned from a wedding. Weddings are supposed to be joyous occasions, but sometimes things can get a little out of hand. Whether it's due to bad behavior, drunken antics, or just plain disrespect, some guests have found themselves on the receiving end of a wedding ban.
In this video, we'll explore some of the wildest and most outrageous stories of wedding bans that have made headlines. From the guest who got drunk and passed out on the dance floor, to the relative who caused a huge scene and ruined the entire event, these stories will have you shaking your head in disbelief.
But it's not just wild antics that can get you banned from a wedding. In some cases, guests who fail to follow the dress code or show up late without a valid excuse can find themselves barred from the festivities. We'll also share some tips on how to avoid getting banned from a wedding, so that you can enjoy the event and celebrate the happy couple in style.
So if you're curious to hear some of the craziest stories of wedding bans, and want to learn how to avoid getting on the wrong side of the bride and groom, then be sure to tune in to this video. As always, like and subscribe for more great content from yours truly, Charlotte Dobre!
#charlottedobre #reaction #react #reactionchannel
If you want to submit a story anonymously, you can do so using the following links:
*DISCLAIMER* Due to a high volume of submissions, there is no guarantee that we will feature your story in a video. By submitting your story, you give me, Charlotte Dobre, the right to feature it in a video.
AITA - Where I decide if you're the AH or not ;) - bit.ly/3Wds7w6
Petty Revenge ! - bit.ly/3PwAUHl
Entitled People Stories - bit.ly/3FtDB83
Crazy Wedding Stories ! - bit.ly/3j1Xonu
Caught A Cheater ? - bit.ly/3FTyFuI
In-Laws From HELL ! - bit.ly/3YqjReg
Hi, I'm Charlotte Dobre. I'm an actor, reactor, singer and sometimes (not really) comedian. On this channel I do reactions, commentary and occasionally I make a joke or two. I love poking fun at social media, weddings, entitled people, tiktok and OF COURSE petty people. I upload daily, usually 7 days a week, unless life gets crazy or I get lazy. Come hang out, it's a good time.
Edited by Timothy Dunsmore
Produced by: Charlotte Dobre
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WE HAVE AN UPDATE!!! Will post it soon!
So exciting!
I hope she says yes 😭😭
OMG YESSS
🎉🎉🎉 (hopefully 😅)
Ohhhh myyyy goddd 2 mins the suspense
If Lauren or Brett become bride/groomzilla’s they’re now legally obligated to write charlotte about it so we the viewers can judge them!
They watch Charlotte, so likely it’ll be bride/groomchilla
They need to just hire Charlotte to document it all lol
Groomchilla… nice one
We will all want the "Tea"
AHHHHHH!!!!! The suspense!!!!!!
Congratulations Lauren and Brett!!❤
I hope Lauren says yes!!!!🤞
Edit: Update y'all, she said yes to the proposal. Congratulations Brett and Lauren!!!
Me too!!!!
Same 💯
Coming here to also wish congratulations if she said yes!
yes! Congratulations I hope! 💕
You can love your spouse and be happy with them, then find out you have a deeper connection with someone else if you lose that first partner. Each relationship is different.
I had *steam* coming out of my ears at the last story when the dad had the sheer unmitigated GALL to say "if we knew your grandparents would raise you this way we wouldn't have left you with them" like WHAT IN THE ACTUAL BRAZEN HELL.
Right?! That is insane to me! They left their child! I would have just said "Nevermind. None of you are invited." How incredibly selfish. That person is LUCKY their grandparents raised them!!
😂👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 fantastic comment and my sentiments _exactly!_
Any time one uses: "unmitigated GALL", I'm delighted! Fantastic phrase in situations like this!❤
I could smell the "leech on society" on them faaaaaaar before we even got to that point
STOP!!!!! The proposal in the beginning has me tearing up. That’s so cute!!❤
Me too! Immediately!
I thought a commercial might interrupt it.
I am in tears right now. That is the sweetest thing I've seen in a while! Charlotte is now cupid, headcanon written
I'm just diceing some onions. 😂
@@lotstodo hchhjጰፀፐፈጤጤጤጥጤጥጤጤጤጤጤጤጤ 🏥
My brother's first wife tragically died in her 20s. They had no children. When he re-married, his previous in-laws certainly didn't go to the wedding. However, when my brother and his wife had children, his previous in-laws sent them birthday and Christmas presents for years when they were little. That was so lovely. They were so happy that my brother found happiness again.
That's sweet. They were happy for him and maybe saw him a little as a "stepson"... but also I don't think you call them ex-inlaws?
@@moonhunter9993 no, previous in-laws as I said. They were lovely.
@@sarahthomas148 I was married for about one year in 1991, it ended very badly. I still love his mother though and we chat on the phone. My only child is her grandson, and I'm happy she is still in our lives. I call her my friend and my son's grandmother.
She hasn't seen or spoken to her son since she testified at his arraignment in 1994. Her last communication with him was when he sent her a threatening letter from prison. She sold her house and moved.
That’s so beautiful. Sadly some aren’t so healthy. There’s a Reddit story somewhere that the previous in-laws wanted their deceased child to be featured all over the wedding and they were livid at him remarrying. If I recall right eventually they calmed down and apologized. But one thing Charlotte missed is that sometimes the marriage isn’t so healthy, there’s two Reddit stories where the wife died of illness but before she found out she was pregnant she intended to divorce and destroy his life but once she discovered her illness she hid it and let him take care of her to death. The other she knew their son wasn’t his and didn’t reveal it until she was dead and that’s when he got a letter. So without knowing about their relationship we can’t judge him.
Your brother was blessed with healthy in laws who truly care and it’s great that it’s all worked out in a loving way
My dad was killed on my due date and my mom had me on the day of his services… my late grandparents never shunned my mom and always called her their daughter… my aunts even call her their sister… I’ll be 32 this year and they still think of my mom as their sister… my grandma was 97 when she passed and my mom still has my grandparents’ birth certificates… my mom has had relationships in between and the guy she’s been with the longest has taken off a couple times…. He once seen them at a city near to us and my grandma threw the biggest shade at him… she told him if he didn’t step away from the truck she was going to hit him… even my uncle that was driving her said the same thing to him… he was cracking up when he was telling us about the story… my grandma was ruthless and didn’t put up with BS!! Except for me cuz I was her baby lmao… my sister split with my niece’s dad but we’re all still close… her new man even goes to the bar with my brother(my sisters ex) and we all still have dinner together… doesn’t matter which house… my brother’s (ex) mom still considers us family and we’re still close to them… she says we’re her family more than her own brothers… so the love is still there and just like you said they’re still family… I guess it just depends on who they were with and how they treat one another… love is love and family is family!!!💙💙💙
OP's bio really had the audacity of calling OP 'mean' for not inviting their throuple partner, after LITERALLY abandoning OP to their grandparents care
Poor Grandparents, can you imagine.
Exactly, they need several seats for that.
My sister was a plus size too. When my cousin, the groom, was getting married the bride (who is so beautiful and kind) wants to make all the immediate cousin part of the wedding party. When they went out to get bridesmaids' dresses my sister did not fit to their chosen dress. The bride went above and beyond to find a similar dress style, in the same color so my sister won't be left out. She just wants everyone to be there and celebrate their love.
That’s a marriage that will last.
That's a kind soul!
See this is what you do😍😍what a great bride
@@carriethompson7919 ikr. You can even notice a bit that she wore different dress in the photos but the bride don't mind.
Thank you for sharing, that’s amazing.
Story 3: They don't sound like free spirits, they are narcissists who care only about there own want's and needs.
They're just pissed that someone else is setting the rules
Was about to say, “free spirits” my tuchus. They sound like responsibility bouncers, avoiding the burden of being parents not by being responsible with things like birth control or condoms, but instead pawned the weight onto someone else so they could go on and “live their best life”, up until their lack of presence would make them look bad, and even now they’re trying to set the rules. Honestly, I wouldn’t have even wanted my parents at the wedding if they had done that to me, cause now it isn’t just not wanting one stranger at the wedding; it’s basically like having three strangers at the wedding.
My problem with the OP's language in Story 1 is that he's clearly been misguided into believing you only get one single "love of your life" and that fueled his weird distancing language. Love is not a finite resource. You don't need to ditch the love you had for your late wife just because you found new love. All the love is valid and you can acknowledge the degree of love you once had for someone gone and still move on to love another.
I was looking for a comment like this. Much closer to what I was thinking. Additionally, I also don't think he's the a-hole, but maybe could still use some counseling sessions regarding his late wife. His mother needs counseling as well.
I came here to the comments to say something like this but you worded it so perfectly already, so now I am just agreeing with what you said 😆.
Yes! All assuming they did actually have a happy marriage, which we don't know at all.
Absolutely agree, you worded that perfectly!
The part that he said that he realized that his first wife wasn't his true love rubbed me in the wrong way. Didn't like that.
I obviously listen to too much true crime because I was like damn dude did you kill your first wife or something?
Charlotte should become an ordained minister!!! Imagine all the many “petty” weddings that will be had…
I was thinking the same thing! ❤
And perform lauren and Brett’s wedding
She would make a nice living marrying the potatoes to their petty spouses
I would renew my vows with my spouse just to have her officiate it!
Oh yes! The passive aggressive vows would be *chefs kiss* 😂
For the first one not only did the mother put his son and the bride in an uncomfortable and difficult position but she put the very people she invited in an uncomfortable and difficult position. They were brought to a wedding they weren’t wanted at. I can’t imagine being invited to a wedding to find out I wasn’t wanted.
I have severe social anxiety, like crippling, this is actually my literal nightmare. I went to a party with a friend once who was invited and who insisted she'd made sure I was invited too. I wasn't. People looked down their nose at me the whole night (let's just say the party were held by a group of very clique-esque people and I soooo didn't fit in at all) and few barely said a few words to me. I slipped at one point, just accidentally and didn't knock anything over or anything, and someone made a loud comment about "the fat drunken bitch" meaning me when I wasn't drunk, just clumsy. That night has been etched into my head since then and I've NEVER not confirmed with someone at a party if it's okay that I come too (if I've already gotten a literal invite I don't double check). I'd be mortified if I showed up to a WEDDING and wasn't wanted or invited. I'd have nightmares about that for years.
I totally agree, also it didn't say how long between the late wife and him meeting the new one. Just that the mother thought he moved on too fast, there are people who are accused of this and then you find out 6 years had passed before they "moved on to fast".
@@BellaGoesJapan omg i'm so so sorry. literal nightmare. lots of hugs from another socially anxious human
I think the bride seems like an adorable person. But I find the way the groom described his late wife was a jerk movie, you know. And the fact he didn't keep contact with hos in laws after her passed kinda jerk movie too. I think in that situation, they should be there for one another. To support each other on their grief. But he totally forgot about them... Hunm... Doesn't seem like he's a really good person, kinda a little selfisj, maybe... I don't know. At least in my country, your in laws never cease to be your in laws ever. So they ar still part of your family in a certain way.
But he might not meant it how it came out.. My brother was married for years had 2 kids his wife passed and he found someone remarried and is happier than ever he loved his first wife the mother of his kids, every one has flaws we talk about good times and bad times ..I don't think he meant to sound like that
Re: the first story -- I remember my mom telling me that she and my dad had agreed that if either one of them were to die before the other, they would want the surviving spouse to remarry, as it would show that they had been happily married to each other -- i.e. they had enjoyed married life and wanted to experience it again. As it happened, my mom was already in her 80s and in early stages of dementia when my dad passed away eight years ago, two days after their 59th wedding anniversary, and she has not remarried nor had a boyfriend, as far as I know. At one point she took off her wedding ring and gave it to me, because someone in the assisted living where she was told her that since my dad had died she was no longer married and shouldn't wear it. Then a few months later she asked if I knew where it was, and so I took it back to her. She put it on, cried, and said over and over, "I have it back! I have it back!"
that's beautiful.
My Dad has friends who mentioned he should take off his wedding ring since my Mom passed away eight years ago and he told them he is “still married in his heart” after 50 years with my Mom. I wish people would mind their business as it sounds like your Mom gets the same comfort in her wedding rings as my Dad. 😊
In my end of world, the widow/ widower wears the wedding ring on the other hand. I think this is beautiful and also leaves space for the new relationship. My grandma started wearing her wedding ring after my grandpa died, because it connected them. Before it was too precious to be wearing while doing the farm work and chores, but once he was gone, she just wanted him with her all the time.
Who told her not to wear it? That's not nice...I love that it gave her joy to get it back!
My mom parent's got married in 1950, and my grandpa died in 1986. My grandma lived another 28 years after his passing and never remarried. I'm not even sure if she dated anyone.
“ I am not choosing sides is what they say to you when they chose a side and it is not you side” this is such a true statement!
Besides, why is going to your brothers wedding choosing sides? Is the SIL so dense that she feels she deserves to be there? She had her wedding as she wanted, excluding who she didn't want. Then this bride had the same right to exclude someone who was really cruel to her. As pissed as the groom is, imagine how hurt his fiancee was when she found out the reason!
True! Feels like they already chose a a side. All the his brother significant other got picks to be bridesmaid. That something that is plan in advance and every bridesmaids know they a part of the wedding in advance. But him and soon to be wife found out when they showed up to the wedding. Not a single family member warn them?
That's what I thought when NOBODY gave them a heads up about the brother's wedding.
@@cathipalmer8217 They all knew and chose back then. They have no right to be all shiny now.
@@ruthmeow4262 💯 that was EXACTLY my 1st thought! They obvi KNEW during the bitchy 1s wedding why she excluded the curvy GF. & They weren't bothered by that! & Prob justified it by saying. It wasnt our wedding or our choice. We didn't get a say in the matter, sorry. Well, same is true now! Not your wedding not your say so keep that same energy!
I had been married for 8 years when I lost my husband to cancer. When he knew it was terminal he repeatedly made me promise I would go on living a good life. During our marriage he had an affair, which I forgave. He passed with regrets sadly. But, he gave me the gift to move on and enjoy life. I did. I met and married the love of my life after a few years and have never been happier.
I hate to say this esp about a passed person buttt that is karma tbh, even tho id rather everyone pass as peacefully as possible he did have an affair which I personally can never forgive no matter what, I am sorry that he passed tho and I hope he does rest in peace but I am happy he regretted it, I am happy for you tho for finding the love of your life
@@xdlchaos2768 On one hand I understand what you’re saying but on the other I think you should’ve kept that to yourself and not tell her that her husband dying of cancer is karma. It feels very inconsiderate and unfair to her by saying that about her late husband.
Sometimes it’s better to keep things to yourself, it doesn’t matter if it’s true or not.
@@pastelnut027 nah nah wait a min, the cancer wasn’t the karma, it was the passing with regrets, cancer is never karma (and if I said it was then I was trippin cuz I definitely did not mean that)
@@xdlchaos2768 Well it seems that I misunderstood what you meant, sorry about that
@@pastelnut027 it’s ok no worries, I worded it weirdly😭
Congratulations Lauren and Brett. Hope you have an amazing life together .
To the man standing up for his wife and not inviting his brother's (awful) wife, you are doing the right thing! And kudos! You are starting your life as a husband on a really strong footing! Good luck and lots of love!
Also, I NEED closure on that proposal!!
Sorry but how can the video say 3h ago and your comment be 4h ago???? I'm scared lol
And I totally agree with your comment btw!!
@@isabela7215 lmao! I think there was a glitch... Seems to have resolved now!
I had 6 girls attending me for my wedding and I only cared about whether or not they were my friends. Not about what they looked like. One of them was a little bit larger and uncomfortable with her arms and shoulders showing since the dresses were strapless. We had bought them off the rack at a department store because I didn't want the girls to have to spend a fortune. So we went back and bought a second dress in her color and my mother, a seamstress, used that one to make a shoulder cape to cover her shoulders. I ONLY cared because my bridesmaid wanted it, i would've been fine either way. I don't even notice her dress is different in the pictures. It's been almost 18 years and she still remembers my mother's kindness.
Quite honestly if my partner excluded someone from our wedding based exclusively on their body shape, I'd not have married them at all. OP sounds like an amazing person and his fiancee too. Hope they have a great wedding day and life together. Lauren and Brett too ;)
Yes. To exclude someone just because of size should naturally lead to the excluder being excluded in return. Like in "You disrespected me and hurt my feelings, and I do not need that kind of person in my wedding."
Yeah the family talking about "chosing sides" as if this was OP's fault. The SIL made the 2 sides with her statement wedding in the first place. So gross.
Agreed.
I could never be married to someone whose values were so diametrically opposed to mine. Excluding someone from a wedding party for being fat is so far in the opposite direction of anything I would stand for that my brains hurt just thinking about it.
Yeah, and fuck the rest of the family complaining about "having to choose sides". None of them stood up for the guy's girlfriend when she was being mistreated, so they clearly didn't mind choosing sides on that one. Assholes, all of them.
I find his family’s complacency with her being excluded from his brother’s wedding disgusting! What kind of family let’s that happen to begin with!
As a polyamorous person, that bride is NTA. I don't expect people to hand out extra invites to all my partners, and introducing a partner to the family is NOT something you do at someone else's wedding. Her parents were completely in the wrong.
was just about to say this! i'm also polyam and i'd never expect someone to invite my potential partner/partners in the future to their wedding, even if they know each other /gen
@@WallaceJonesRS2023 Period!
Sorry, but they don't deserve to even be called parents. They brought a child into the world and were too self absorbed to step up and be responsible.
Especially since they were not in her life, you don’t get to make demands when you were absent
Totally agree. I went through an almost identical situation with my wedding, but it was with my uncle and his new girlfriend. Not only had I never met her, but his ex wife was already coming to my wedding and they were freshly separated (not even divorced) - also no guests got a +1 as we wanted to keep it small. That whole side of the family were up in arms about it and caused massive drama. Long story short, every single one of them RSVPd no, my grandparents even sent back my handmade invitation ripped to shreds. The wedding was even better without them. There was SOOOO much more drama than this, but it's way too long for a comment.
"But my wife also deserves a wedding day with only people who love and cherish her." Now THAT'S how it should be done. I wish all fiancés cared that much about their partners and stood up for them or removed people from the wedding who treat the bride/groom like shit. Good on him.
3:24
NOT ONLY did she cross the line MULTIPLE times, but you know that she would have done something at the wedding because she truly didn't approve of it. that's why she had done all the things she did... She DESERVED to be kicked out of the wedding at that point... AND the fact that the dad WHO WAS DIVORCED FOR 15 YEARS should have understood why she got kicked out!!!...
That's the part that absolutely confused me. His dad divorced her, and he's taking HER side? He left her for a reason and he's apparently forgotten that reason.
I don't know. She was his late wife...I don't think they're "ex"inlaws... why does he have such a bad relationship with them.
@@moonhunter9993 that could be a story for another time, the main issue was his mom just not wanting him to have happiness with another woman. She can't REALLY except her son to grief forever over his passed wife. At some point, everyone has to move on. Even his passed wife's parents were ashamed to admit they showed up to a wedding they weren't invited to all because the groom's wife insisted on them coming
@@lindapatton4478 yo you are assuming A LOT. This is gross.
Just because they are divorced doesn't mean the dad can't be just as much of a selfish asshole as she is..... How dare you just assume he's a nice guy lol
@@lindapatton4478 You can divorce someone and still like and respect them.
I was engaged at 19 and she passed away in a car accident I buried her with her family 4 months before we were to be married, and it was hard not to compare her to every one after when I did get married 5 years later, I had never talked to my wife about what had happened which looking back on it was wrong, but I did not want her feeling like a replacement for someone who had passed. And when I got Married I did not ask Ex-Finance's parents to come not because they were not a part of my life, but because I didn't want my Wife to feel bad because she got to do what their daughter didn't. That doesn't mean I loved her less or love her parents less either. It means that chapter in my life was Over and that she was the new chapter.
I’m trying to figure out what “op” stands for 😅
@@aneta5196 "original poster"
Folks need to understand that everyone grieves differently. It took me a year to come to terms with my granny passing but it took my cousin almost a decade for her mother. Both were mother roles in our lives.
And i had no feelings about my parents when they died,when they told me i moved on within 1 minute,you might think they were bad parents for me feeling that way,but no,they took care of me, treated me normal,did i love them, i would not go that far,i would say i liked them.
@@runeingebretsen8378 you didn’t love your parents, even though they were good parents? 😮
Just saying, that seems really strange to me. I don’t necessarily like my parents, we have very few common interests, and are very much at odds politically. I definitely love them, even though they’ve done a couple of pretty rotten things to me, that might break up some families, though.
@@ILoveYou-rv3pd sorry i can't help what i feel,i have always been very flat in my emotions,i was born this way.
@@runeingebretsen8378 you should see a therapist. Not having the capacity for love isn’t healthy.
@@ILoveYou-rv3pd i am doing just fine,i sleep,i talk to people,and i work,and i see my sisters once in a while,do i miss loving someone not at all,BTW you can't fix brain damage,by therapy,remember i said i was born this way.
Congratulations, Lauren and Brett! I hope that she says yes, and I hope that they'll have a long and happy life together. So nice of Charlotte to actually do that for them: haven't seen an influencer do something this wholesome in a while.
As a bigger women myself I always get treated horribly. Going shopping most places don’t want to help me my friends can go into a fancy shop and an associate greet them immediately while they walk past me or say things like oh no that would never fit you. You sister in law is the AH here she fat shamed your fiancé. Don’t let anyone ruin your wedding. She deserves to feel BEAUTIFUL AS SHE IS!!! ❤
At least you weed out all of the shallow people. When you fit into the beauty standards, people treat you dishonestly just to get your attention. If you don’t fit into the beauty standards then when you meet people who actually treat you good, you know they really mean it.
You said that beautifully, and it's a really good message. Thanks for a great post.
So do you. I’m sorry you get treated like that.
So, this one of the reasons that at my wedding I gave my bridesmaids clothing swatches of the correct red I wanted. They got to pick whatever dress made them feel beautiful. I just wanted it to be the same shade of red. I also looked out for sales the months leading up to my wedding and always forwarded them the info. My friends were/are all different heights, weights and economic levels. I wanted to make sure that they could feel happy, beautiful and comfortable without breaking the bank on their dresses. They ended up picking dresses that some of them continued to wear to other events since they fit their style. I will never regret having lots of different dress styles. All I wanted was everyone to have fun and be comfortable. I was exhausted at my wedding from all the prep I was doing leading up to it, so I don't remember a lot of it, but to this day I still have people comment that my wedding was "the most fun" wedding they'd been to. The fact that people I care about had a blast is what matters the most to me.
Last story: The entire dynamic of the abandonment of OP by her parents in order to fulfill their "Life Style" is very sad to me. If I was OP and the whole wedding invite drama over their lover was occurring I hope I'd just be simple and say to her parents: "How about all of you stay away! All of you are uninvited!" From what OP tells us they were never worthy of an invitation from the beginning.
Thank you! I was looking for this comment lol, OP invited her bio parents as a courtesy and nothing more (which is more than they deserved to be completely honest) they are in no position to ask for anything more! If I was in OP shoes one complaint of the matter would have been the end of it and uninvited them right there.
@@alexandria637 Yes and it was as a courtesy to her grandparents who requested it. So the bio parents have two options: 1) accept the invitation graciously as it was issued; or 2) graciously decline if they don’t want to go to the wedding without their extra partner. Under no circumstances is their estranged daughter’s wedding the time or occasion to introduce and share their new lifestyle choice. The event is not about them, it is about the daughter and the groom. Manners, people!
@@judycroteau482 Exactly! At the root of this I honestly believe the OP's bios just felt entitled their daughter's wedding day as a way to validate themselves and their life style. I'm happy OP drew a line with them and that she has very supportive grandparents backing her up.
Yep, the bio parents aren't owed anything. I was in the same situation having grown up with my grandparents, my bio dad kept in touch, bio mother didnt as much. Neither of them were even told I was getting married. Neither of them seemed to care either. You just stay greatful for your grandparents and keep moving forward.
Yeah my parents hate my partner and we have a lot of drama so I didn’t go to my brothers wedding unfortunately because I was invited as a guest out of obligation and was told if I “chose their side” (meaning because they didn’t like my partner I should dump him) so they said “if I chose their side I’d be up there with the wedding party not just a guest” which I’m not about that drama so I didn’t go and I feel like my brother hates me for it, haven’t heard from him since but it was my mother that initially asked if I’d go to the wedding and said those things to me, a lot of drama involved but yeah can sort of relate 😅
I love how weddings brings out the true colors of family members. It’s wild what these people will do these so called loved ones. The entitlement to being visited to the things they try to force on the wedding part is wild.
And funeral.
@@It-is-me...Melsie yee but it’s the fact that SO’s who had barely started dating family members were bridesmaids, like I think one of the bridesmaids was a gf who had only been dating a family member for like 3 months
If I were in the family, I would think it’s weird
The only reason I could see them not telling OP and his wife is they assumed that she couldn’t do it (for whatever reason) and said no?
@@It-is-me...Melsie it’s so sad everyone morally was okay with that and are now bullying the poor bride on her own special day. It’s so weird to see bullying from family.
If you don't want me to be in any of your wedding photos deliberately because you think I'm an eye sore, I don't want you at my wedding because your existence is a thorn in my side which you confirmed 🥰
BRAVO!!! 100% agree. You said that so eloquently and it was short and to the point. Nothing more to say after that. 🍾🎉🎤
The widower wasn't at all wrong. No one can tell him how to grieve and recover. He didn't know until he started dating again that his second wife was a better fit. He didn't tell his former inlaws this. He has every right to his feelings and is allowed to say them outloud. Again, it doesn't sound like he told this to first wife's parents which would be cruel, imo.
I agree. The wording was a bit off, but it didn’t mean he’s happy that his first wife died.
Yeah exactly! I can't believe people are calling him callous for being happier with his new wife and recognizing that his love with his 1st wife wasn't meant to be. That's literally a beautiful way to look at it.
The guy whose fiancee got excluded cause of her weight... yo, that guy deserves respect for sticking up to his wife. It's harder than you think to stick up to your whole family, and they were being really awful. That makes me mad!
As someone who is in an active Polyam relationship, it can work (just like any other relationship) with communication and consent and it is not something that is flaunted or otherwise needed to be involved in a wedding. Those parents were lucky to receive an invite at all.
Side note, I watched maybe two videos of yours before subscribing and have at least one tab open with your videos at all times now. Your energy is lovely, keep it up!
now I know why they have those king size beds lol
Ugh that proposal was so adorable!! Hope she said yes🎉🎉
As somebody who chose not to "pick sides" as a teenager, when my friend asked me to pick her side over the side of the boyfriend she cheated on, I can absolutely conform, it's a way to quietly pick a side. By telling one person you don't want to pick sides, you're telling them you picked the other person's side.
"By telling one person you don't want to pick sides, you're telling them you picked the other person's side."
I think you can perfectly say that and actually stay neutral. If your philosophy is not to pick sides in a certain situation, why wouldn't it be like that then? All you really do is dissagreeing with the idea that you have to pick sides.
It depends on the situation too ofc. In Story 2, I would have definitely chosen a side. It's hard not to.
@@Rain-Dirt In the situation I mentioned, my every intention was to stay neutral, but when my friend started pressuring me to pick her side, I told her I didn't want to pick sides and that if she couldn't accept that, she would be the one to lose me. The way I see it now, I was picking a side, even if I didn't want to.
But I agree with you, in story 2 I would have picked a side too.
@@nathryl03 Are you still friends?
@@Rain-Dirt Not anymore. After being asked to pick between her and other people multiple times I distanced myself.
@@nathryl03 Hm... I think I'm gonna stay neutral on this one... lol
I hope you didn't lose a lot.
Ok but if I had a family member who excluded my fiancee and I excluded them from the wedding and people started having a problem with me not inviting a person who hurt the person I love, they'd all be getting uninvited. If you're willing to stand with a hateful person, I don't want you in my life.
Story 1:NTA he didn't treat the inlaws badly. He apologized to them for thesituation, told them he hadn't invited them, *BUT* he also told them they could stay. He rightly kicked out his mom for crossing major boundaries and they *chose* to go with her.
One of my best friends I haven't seen in 15 years chose me as a bridesmaid. It's not plural because there were only two of us. Maid of honor and me. Not to say she doesn't have friends but we're like sisters even tho the distance. I was at my biggest, I mean FAT!!!! Plus I'm missing teeth. I wore some cheap prosthetic I got off Amazon for the photos and they HURT!!!!! She saw my pain and told me to take them out. I told her I didn't wanna mess up her photos. She teared up and told me I could never. Her video has the moment with my teeth missing and it's absolutely beautiful!
It's honestly a very difficult thing to try and explain to people who haven't experienced the death of a significant other. Had I heard this story prior to my late partner's passing, I'd go with AH. BUT, I have lost a partner. I went through that grief and I can see it from his side. If his mom has been clashing with him for 6 years about this, he's got to be SOOOOO done. So done. Not the AH.
Yeah I don't get how anyone is tone policing him for HIS dead wife, like you weren't even there let alone part of the couple, he found love again so obviously he is in a pretty healthy place tbh sure he was a bit chillier than some people here liked but he's still in a good place at least at the moment so the fact that other people are trying to cause him more hurt over this is disgusting
I'm also pissed that people didn't emphasize or really even seem to care about how much the MORHERs actions hurt the in-laws
He wasn't even rude to them he said you hadn't been invited but since you're here you can stay, he only kicked the mother, not the in-laws. The mother on the other hand, decided to torture them because she felt it was appropriate
I got married at 18. I was too young and immature to pick a "Perfect Love" back then. So it makes sense that as an adult he'd find a better match. It sounds like his mom was an interfering person. He probably was just tired of her sh*t by then.
This. And the late wife might not have been a nice person...
It also seems like everyone is ignoring the fact that he was only married to his late wife for 1 year, and that she died 6 YEARS AGO!
I was wondering if his callous talk about his ex wife not being his true love was a reaction to his mom being so in his face about everything. It would quickly get annoying to constantly hear how this new marriage was too quick and wasn't as good as the last marriage and how the ex is better etc. His mother is really being rude to the new lady he has fallen in love with. That's gotta sting for sure.
@@sunihohn7431 But they dated for 4 years before that, so they were together for 5 years, marriage really isn't the only part of the relationship that counts.
@@littleraeofsunshine You really wanna go there? 'Cause that's disgusting seeing as you have no info at all about the deceased wife.
"Don't be like Switzerland, we are at war!" has to be one of the funniest things I have hard in a while. I have been really stressed out and not feeling great, thank you for lifting my mood Charlotte. I love your videos, espcially the bridezilla ones. Thank you for putting in all of the effort to post everyday, it always brightens my day when I see a new video from you.
9:02- if you choose to not decide, you too have made a choice- sun tzu
My uncle tragically died in an accident 10 years ago after being married to his wife for nearly 20 years, and they had twins for the better part of their life together. She is a widow and has been for so long... right at the end of the pandemic, she started going out with a guy but had reservations about telling my family since she didn't want to be seen as if she were "getting over" her late husband. When she awkwardly told us she was going on a date, we were all so happy to see her move on toward happiness. This is what my uncle would have wanted and what she deserved after grieving for so long. She will always be my aunt, even if she isn't with my uncle anymore, and her sons will always be my cousins. My grandma still treats her like a daughter, and my aunts and uncles treat her like a sister. We always let her know we want to be part of her life, and we want her to be happy in whatever shape that happiness takes, no awkward feelings here!
Beautiful 😊
That first story: the mother has serious boundary issues. If she'd go as far as bringing his ex-in-laws to the wedding _after_ he said no, who KNOWS what she'd be capable of doing _during_ the wedding. 😮
Me thinks when the pastor/priest/officiant says "does anyone here have a reason these two shouldn't be joined in marriage......" Yeah, I can imagine his mother making a scene!
The first one yup. The mom was overstepping for sure. but I'm still stuck on the part where he said that the first wife wasn't the love of his life even though they had only been married for a year. Did he say that to appease the second wife? I find that comment to be messed up.
Also if she objects during the wedding the officiant legal cannot perform that ceremony and the wedding certificate could possibly be void. I do know for certain the officiant will not officiate the wedding if someone is objects. The bride and groom would have to be official married another day. So OP made the right call.
@@Shellygrrl2573 that comment really was a bit unneccesary .. I'm guessing both he and his late wife were younger and less experienced, and it's absolutely possible that he has a deeper love with his new wife but I just don't think there is any need for making comparisons like that. His mother would still be out of line even if he didn't love his new wife more than his late wife, so there was no need to bring that up.
@@Shellygrrl2573 Not necessarily. I know lots of people who got married and immediately regretted it (sad but true). They obviously were not a good fit for each other, the problem in the story is that she happens to be deceased to there is no nice way for him to glad he got to move on without being judged.
@@lisahuber9329 Can imagine them being pretty young too, but also can imagine his mother being overbearing about it for 6 years, not letting him grieve in the way he is comfortable, not accepting that he is moving on, and him constantly having to defend himself and his new wife against her. He was on the defense for a better part of the decade, kind of makes sense that it becomes his default stance at this point.
1st story: I took OP's statement that his late first wife "obviously wasn't the love of his life" to be IN RETROSPECT. He may well have loved her deeply, and been gutted when she died, but now, years later, he knoes that he DID get over it, DID fall in love again, and from his current perspective may see ways that his current partner is an improvement over his first one. Of course, that first experience may have made him a better partner, more able to build an improved marriage, but he was giving us a quick background, not an in depth analysis.
THIIIIS!!
She couldn't have been the love of his life, she's dead.
Story 1: as a widow of almost five years now I feel I can speak for the man. Although, I have children with my deceased husband I would in no way invite any of my former in-laws if I were to get remarried. I do have a good relationship with my former in-laws but don’t feel they’re relevant to my current nor future relationships. As to the thought people are having for him sounding like he’s happy his first wife died… he’s not happy about it but rather he’s accepted the fact that their relationship is over and has healed enough to move forward with someone new. He’s actually saying he’s grateful for the time he had with his first wife because if it wasn’t for her, he wouldn’t have met his current significant other. It’s not something that can be judged unless you’ve actually been through it. Some people are remarried quickly, others take their time. There is no timeline for grief. Definitely NTAH.
Maybe you’re right but I felt like he mentioned he was happier without her a lot. I counted it and in the 2 minute story he said it about 5 times.
I definitely agree. I saw what he said as "While she was alive, I thought she was the love of my life, and I loved her dearly, but now that she's passed away, I understand that there was a greater love waiting for me. I just didn't know it. And now I do." He didn't say anything disparaging about his first wife or their relationship.
@@lullaby3410 well maybe late wife was abusive you never know.
@@lullaby3410 also he specified because mom thinks he is still in love with late wife
I agree. I mean you just have to pick up and go. Sometimes you just gotta move on
A PROPOSAL! Who could have foreseen THAT today! Brett, my dude, I sincerely hope Lauren said yes and you two are out celebrating! Congratulations, and God bless!
No comments or update probably a no
@@ap1463 It probably means they're having their private, post-proposal moments. I doubt they went straight to the comment section for our reactions.
i always start crocheting as soon as you post video. never thought crocheting and online 'gossiping' go together so well🍵🍵
Congratulations Lauren and Brett! What a unique and wonderful way to ask, Brett! I'm sure Charlotte was so honored to be apart of the process!
sry but being apart is pretty much just the opposite than to be a part lol
@@humppapomppa1186 thank you for voicing my thoughts lol
14:41 last story-Mom accuses her of outing their private business to everyone but was willing to out themselves at wedding? They’d be sooo uninvited!!
good idea
In response to the first story, I think it’s fine that he realized that his first wife wasn’t the love of his life. He said he loved her but they were young. It would be really sad for him to never be able to find a new love and I don’t know why his mom would want him to hold onto the pain of a life that was taken from him. It would also suck for his new wife if he could never love her as much as his first life. Love grows over time and he’s supposed to spend the rest of his life with her. He definitely needed to be nicer in front of the in-laws since it wasn’t their fault that his mom had no boundaries.
I agree
What right does anyone have to tone police him about how he has recovered from the loss if his beloved wife, he found love again so he can't be that messed up, if he has reacted in a healthy way if admittedly chillier than some prefer then what right does anyone from us to char to even his mother have to try to cause him more hurt about it? Genuinely how does anyone get off doing that. As someone who is neurodivergent that sounded perfectly acceptable, oh it didn't conform to how you think people should discuss dead spouses? That cute tell me about how you were person 3 in that monogamous relationship and then MAYBE you have some footing on to critique it but even then you still don't different people are different people. A lot of people need to learn that lesson
@@ConstantChaos1everyone can offer their opinion. You using neurodivergence to detract that to MOST in the comment section, the way in which he referred to his late wife was on the harsher side. Get over it. Everyone can have an opinion including you, but who tf are you to police opinions?
@raquanwilliams5572 what are you saying gurl? that reads like word salad. I didn't use my neurodivergence to detract from anyone lmfao. It's not my fault you saw neurodivergent and thought "bad" but it does say a lot about you.
@@ConstantChaos1 sister, you said “as someone who’s neurodivergent, that sounded perfectly acceptable”. What does that have to do with literally anything? And no one said it was bad boo. You cited something irrelevant as to why you have your opinion. Most people thought it sounded rude, but he’s entitled to feel that way. Plus, you’re talking about tone policing but you’re trying to police the opinions of most of the comment section. It’s weird. Also, I speak French natively so sorry. I try my best
I feel for the 'fat' bride big time - I wasn't invited to be part of my bro's wife's wedding party for the same reason, though it was phrased as "I wouldn't fit in with her vision' (I was only a size 12-14 at the time, now a 16-18). I've let it go for the most part, but not entirely. It still hurts. We see each other sporadically and are civil, but I'm uncomfortable still and it breaks my heart hearing my 6 year old niece say she can't eat something because it'll "make her fat".
Disgusting behavior I’m sorry you have a SIl like this. 😢
@@killerfreckles1162 Thank you. We get along fine when we're around each other, and we're 'family', but we're not friends. It's sad, but it is what it is. I'm not really friends with my brother either.
size 12 isn't even fat!
Someone's pulling a Yolanda Hadid
Disgusting. I'd avoid those people too. Sad they've reproduced and are spreading their ideology.
Hey C.
Thanks for standing up for fat people and letting us have dignity. It’s always nice when the pretty girl stands up for us. ❤
Fat girls can be pretty girls too 😉
You are loved fellow potato ❤
Potatoes rise up
Potato party
The last story about the "free spirit" parents just perfect explains why some people don't deserve kids. They practically disowned their own daughter and then tried to shame and guilt-trip her for when they didn't receive any special treatment about a plus one. They were incredibly LUCKY to even get an invite, and only did so because the bride's real parents (her grandparents) begged her too.
Funny that there was no drama within the family for not choosing YOUR side when your fiancé was excluded from the wedding!!
One time at a wedding, there were these spinach wrapped things and so as a kid, I was eating them and when I went to grab another one it was the last, so I snatched it-- little did I know, some random lady was reaching for it and glared at me and I stared her dead in eyes and bit the spinach thing in her face and ran away- best part of the wedding since I didnt know anyone
Just a small story for commentors to look at for today if you like reading stories in here
I would do the exact same thing
Lol, that’s so funny
And you did this as a kid! Hilarious😂
You're the GOAT!!! I just picture some kid grabbing the spinach roll looking up at the adult doing an evil laugh biting it and tear assing away. 😂😂😂😂😂😂
It was the dead-in-the-eye-contact and that defiant CHOMP! for me. Hilarious! I love kids, especially when they were accidently naughty, but chose to own it anyway!
Honestly that's a super sweet proposal, imagine waking up and seeing omg my favorite TH-camr posted and then she does this
OR your partner says "hey so and so posted you wanna sit and watch together?" And they have it all set up in your jammies together and they pull out the ring
That's the cutest most intimate proposal I would cry it's too sweet
How great are sister-in-laws! Went with my husband to visit his mother at Christmas, and watched my sister-in-laws exchange gifts right in front of me. No, I was not included! Found out they all text and talk regularly. I was excluded. I was a little hurt at first, then realized I'm better off not being a part of their group. Who wants to be friends with "adults" who behave like that!
I'm sorry that your butthole in-laws excluded you this way, but happy that you recognize you are better off without them (and truly you are).
Those type of people act like they’re still in middle school with cliques and all. Yeah. No thanks. Edit: yes, it is hurtful. My one BIL’s ex and our other SIL would do that…go into the kitchen and whisper whisper whisper. I just thought, “Seriously? Have you nothing better to do than act like a pair of teens? Grow up!” While growing old IS mandatory and growing up is optional, there is a time when one does have to act with maturity. They did not.
Well said!
Hate people like that,, like behave please you are in your 30's and living with your parents how are you not ashamed 😅
well ... if they're your sister-in-laws, I take it it means they are actual sisters? And have been for their whole life? You'd be the new one, and not an actual sister, but a sister-in-law, so if their tradition of exchanging gifts have been going on long before you were in the picture, I can see how they would not think about including you immediately. And of course the sisters would text and talk regularly, that's only natural.
Story 1: I mean the ex in-laws were definitely put in a bad position here, but seriously ... who goes to a wedding of someone when they were invited by someone else, who was neither the bride nor the groom and doesn't even ask about it?
Also, going by how the mother treated the whole situation I'm not sure if she wouldn't have mad a scene there, like speaking up during the "speak up or forever hold your peace" or maybe an awkward speech like "Oh man, his first wedding was so cool" or how his first wife was better or how awesome it would be if the first wife was there etc etc. If you get so little support beforehand I'm not sure if having her there would've been a good idea at all.
In the end some people move on sooner, some do it later and I'm not sure if you can really judge someone based on your own feelings here. Maybe his wedding wasn't good, maybe they would've divorced half a year later, but nobody will ever know that.
Story 2: The family didn't choose sides directly, but definitely indirectly by not even speaking up about the elephant in the room and they now give OP crap, because they think they should suck it up and because they think they're the lesser evil which is not okay at all.
Story 3: Nope, wouldn't invite this new guy at all. Obviously they can do whatever they want with their lives and such, but the parents themselves were only invited as a courtesy and were basically dead beats all the way already, have no reason to doubt that they wouldn't use this as a chance to be like "Look at us, we're so special, you need to pay attention to us" or something like that.
If you want to introduce someone or something out of the ordinary or if you want to make a special announcement, do not and I repeat, DO NOT do this at someone else's special event, like a wedding, an anniversary or something like that.
Don’t announce things at others special events without the express permission of the person the special event is about/from the host.
5:07 my husband and I actually straight up told each other that if one of us died early, we’d want the other to move on. Mourn as long as whoever needed, but it was okay to move on
The mom crossed the line by inviting the ex in-laws to the wedding. Congratulations to Lauren and Brett !
She absolutely did and I would have done the same thing. Regardless of how we feel he's handling his late wife's memory is irrelevant. Mom had absolutely no right to do that and tossing her out of the wedding will hopefully get her to back off and be more supportive of your CURRENT marriage.
Some of these entitled parents...so incredibly toxic.
Special thanks to charlotte for doing that for Brett and Lauren! That’s a smart guy to know who his gal likes to watch and letting her have that amazing memory of someone you love watching being the one to ask you and it being different and special.
Dang, I’m playing catch-up… As for the overweight bride, loyalty is everything. I work physical security at a bank. People can be (and unfortunately are) rude to me all day, but I’ll turn it into a joke and laugh it off… Until they do it to one of our customers, Especially the sweet old folks who show up in person because they want someone to talk to. The second that happens, they are out. No three strikes, they are leaving. When you care about someone you stick up for them. Not sticking up for them sends an equally strong message.
*Thank you for including us in the proposal! So sweet!
I cried at that proposal! That shows how much he pays attention to her 🥺❤️❤️❤️
I love throuple dads logic, I never would have abandoned you as a child to be raised by extended family if I had known they were going to raise you wrong! 😂😂😂. Dude, if there was ever a time to go no contact, this is it, sounds like the bio parents went no contact with OP over a decade ago and they have NO rights or say in whatever OP does or who they don’t invite to their wedding
Truth! “We wouldn’t have selfishly taken advantage of them in the past if we knew we couldn’t selfishly take advantage of you in the present!”
Dad has no business commenting on how the OP was raised. What a couple of selfish, immature hypocrites.
And then complain that the son was airing their personal business. Well duh! It would’ve been aired out at the wedding! Guests deserved at least a little heads up.
Story #1 is my mom. I LOVE my mom, she's my best friend. But her obsession with my very first boyfriend is..smh I don't have words.. Any man after him literally cannot compare and cannot win, when it comes to my mom... It's incredibly disheartening and sad to watch all the bs my mom puts any man in my life through, they literally get zero chance.
That proposal was amazing ❤ i hope she said yes 💍
PS - my parents went to my brother in-law’s wedding ( my sister died). They were thrilled for him ( we all were) that he has someone to be happy with. My brother was best man. It’s possible to find love again without it meaning that the first spouse wasn’t less-than.
I went and was invited to my sister-in-law's wedding. She was married to my brother and he passed away from cancer. I was happy she found another person to share her life with. He is a really great guy and I was happy to be a part of that day as a guest. That being said just because you've lost someone does not mean your love for them dies with them. I agree with the others that the way he spoke of his late wife was off to me. Maybe he hasn't processed his grief. Grief is a very ongoing process. It almost feels like if he says he didn't love his late wife then maybe it won't hurt. Or maybe something entirely different. My point is you can still be there for someone even if you're not technically family anymore. Of course if that is also what they want too. My late brother deeply loved his wife and I hope in some small way I can be a reflection of that. Even if it's just going to her wedding in show of support.
I’ve have had two cousins I grew up with that had all the cousins in the bridal party except for me when I was at my heaviest weight, and they said nothing to me, but my aunt said it was due to my possibly not being able to afford it, which was clearly a lie. No one was plus sized in their wedding. It just showed me that I was not important to them, if not visually appealing. I was hurt but never brought it up with them. I don’t have a relationship with any of them at this point. Not a loss.
That is toxic as helll. I'm so sorry. Good for you for keeping them at arm's length. I don't understand this whole obsession of wanting perfect pictures that involve excluding your loved ones because "they aren't visually pleasing." That is sick and disgusting; you deserve so much better than that ❤
@@Claudia-lq3ns Thank you, Claudia! My family is toxic in general, “hate the abuse not the abuser” type of people, pero I expected our generation to do better. 😒
I think that the reason people react so strongly to the first story is that no one wants to believe that they wouldn't be the love of their partners life. The truth is, if you die young, you wouldn't want to be the love of their life, because them being stuck in grief like that would be heartbreaking. You would want them to be happy and move on. In life it's offensive, but imagine seeing your partner from heaven being stuck the rest of their life if you died young. Truly imagine it. If you really love them, it would be torture. We don't like people saying it out loud because we have romanticized the notion of never moving on, which is a really toxic notion. My aunt died young and she would be so happy for her living husband finding someone knew and honestly much healthier for him. I was supposed to have died young (they don't know why I lived through the incident that was supposed to have killed me) and I've though about this a lot when I was struggling to move on from my aunt's death. I realized that if anyone struggled the way I did if I had died when I was 14, I could be in heaven and I would still live in purgatory until they were happy. I think OP writes the way he does bc he's had this conversation a million times with his mom, and because he is probably trying really hard to not feel guilty about moving on, and when his mom is trying to reinforce the (unfair and non-realistic) guilt he locks himself down, becomes really black and white in how he speaks, and thereby sounds like a-hole. He's probably also doing it out of respect for Helena, and she seems to be a lovely person that doesn't stand up for herself, so I can see why. He says he loved his wife and it's probably one of the worst things he ever went through. Just because you aren't the love of your partner's life it doesn't mean they didn't love you with everything they had, or that it matters less. And moving on is okay, I'm sure his wife would've been thrilled for him and I don't think it's said enough what an absolute horrific piece of human garbage his mother is for dragging his old parents in law there just to re-traumatize them and make a point, knowing that they weren't invited. How messed up you must be to do that, I legitimately don't think it had everything to do with her daughter in law passing away, this seems super possessive to me. I wonder if she is afraid she is going to lose him to his new relationship and is trying to keep him in the old one so she won't lose him. Especially if it's that she doesn't want to lose him TOO.
By doing that, she could very well lose him. Some people are their own worst enemies.
To be fair the reason why I agreed with Charlotte isn't that he couldn't truly believe that his new wife is the love of his life (hopefully she is) and that he is happier. It's that he chose to write his post in a way that in my opinion disparaged his old wife in order to emphasize his happiness in his new relationship when I think it was unncessary. That being said, I will give him the benefit of the doubt that he is just a bad writer and didn't think how his words would come across. Not everyone is good at expressing themselves in written form, I'm just going to go with he worded things poorly when he didn't need to, so NTA but its understanding the reaction he got.
@@jakeryan4545 What I meant is that us saying that our old partner wasn't the love of our lives when we've moved on isn't disparaging. We find it disparaging because we think it's an insult, but it really isn't. He loved her, but she isn't the love of his life because she passed and he moved on. But it's a loaded expression, so obviously we get upset when we hear it. I didn't react well to it either, but if he is a very literal person, it means many will think he's an ass (common with people both with ADHD and people with autism, I'm an advocate for people with mental health issues and have ADHD and it happens to us all the time). But, saying she wasn't the love of his life doesn't mean she wasn't the love of the first part of his life, if you see what I mean? 😌🍀✨ That said, as I wrote I do think it has more to do with him being at his wit's end because of having the argument so many times with his mother that he is not aware of how it might come across to someone who hasn't been in those discussions, and that his anger towards his mother ends up (to us) hitting his wife instead in a very unfair and (in regards to him) unbecoming way. But if you read what he wrote literally and not adding in underlying meaning to what he is saying, he's not being mean to his wife. If you read it literally, he is saying he loved her, but since she passed she's not the love of his life (from a literal definition of the love of his life and not a symbolic one), Helena is. I'm also guessing that he's mother has been telling him his wife was the love of his life a lot and that's why he is using that term over and over again. It's common human speech patterns in situations like these, I have to deal with this a lot as an advocate 🥲😅🍀✨😊
I think you right with this thoughts. Thank you for writing them down.
@@jakeryan4545 No, he is the A-hole, because the parents of his dead wife were still indeed family, and he embarrassed them and made his momma cry. Not cool, definitely an A-hole.
All love in every relationship I’ve been in is different. Not just the intensity but we connect at different levels depending on age and where we are at in life at the moment. Young love is so different than in your 30’s
So my parents were married for more than 40 years, and they were happy. They had three children and a pretty good life together. My dad died of cancer in 2015. My mom remarried my stepdad Marty in 2020. Right after I had my first child. I was very happy that my son, and now my daughter would have a grandfather because my dad had passed away and Marty is fantastic and he had been married before also and his wife also passed away in 2018 from cancer. So my mom was able to help him through the first year grieving process and they bonded through that and honestly, my mom is way happier with Marty than she ever was with my dad! Does that mean that, we love my dad any less? No! Not by half! Does it mean that we are being disrespectful to his memory? No, not at all! Do I think that my dad and Marty‘s previous wife Mary got together in heaven, and decided to hook up my step, dad and mom? Yes, I do! Is Marty happier with my mom than he was with Mary, his daughter and son both think so. Second marriages are often better than first marriages. First marriages you’re learning how to be married in a second marriage you already know how to do it how to be a husband or how to be a wife there’s no learning that together so you skip all the hard parts, and get straight to the good stuff! At least for the most part. All this to say that having seen how my mom and Marty are and seeing how in love they are and how much happier my mom is with her second husband than her first. I don’t think it’s a slight on my dad at all. I think it shows that she learned a lot being married to my dad, I also think that it’s quite possible for people to not find their perfect mate until later in life if my mom and Marty had met when they were in their early 20s like my parents didn’t like Marty and Marie did maybe they would have been married maybe my dad would be Marty maybe our lives to be completely different but that wasn’t the plan that wasn’t in the works. Things happen the way they do for a reason and it sounds like this person loved his first wife, and if she had lived would’ve probably stayed married to her for a while maybe it would’ve been a divorce maybe they would’ve stayed married their whole entire lives, who knows, but that didn’t happen she passed and asking him to not be as happy as he Canby, or to only be as happy as he was in his first marriage is not fair.
It took my mother three tries (but finally found the right one. Although I'm not sure if you can really count her first marriage be cause he was already married, and the marriage was annulled, even though my sister was born of their "union"). Mother and Dad were together nearly 60 years before cancer took my mother, and Dad going a year later. I think that him missing her was more the reason he died, instead of the cancer he too had contracted.
He loved my sister as if she was his biological child, and fully adopted her, as he was the only father she had known (she was even MOH at their wedding at the age of 1), then along came my brother and I.
That’s so sweet! Thank you for sharing your story.
I can’t wait to hear her answer!!
#1 was definitely not the ah. He had to explain the situation to be understood, so he had to tell us his deceased wife wasn’t “the one”. He wasn’t disparaging at all, just succinctly factual.
Who's to say that you can't have more than one love? If one is lost, there could be another that comes along later. The heart has an unlimited amount of love that it can give.
Right, that's how it read to me. Just factual- not disparaging; you can still have had a happy marriage and acknowledge that it wasn't the one and that you're much happier with your new wife-to-be but that it's OTHERS around you who are refusing to let go and insisting it's not true.
@@jacklow9611 I don’t think anyone is saying you can’t have more than one “the one”. The wife who died just didn’t happen to be one of them.
That through me through a loop. The wedding proposal. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwww, it's SO ROMANTIC!!!!!!!!!!❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Charlotte sure has been doing a lot of wedding videos lately... Something to tell us a Dear?!? 👰 👰 👰
My question too!!!🤔🤔
❤ 🥔 ❤
🤣 nope it’s just wedding season and I love doing them!
@@CharlotteDobre well, we do collectively approve of Mike! When the time is right so, you have our blessing to say 👍 (sry, couldn't help myself, you are a TH-camr after all!), should you happen to choose him! 💗💕💘💞💓
I can just imagine Charlotte giving Mike a "like" for a Yes! 😂
@@CharlotteDobre darn! Ok I guess I was “low key” hoping!😁
After that last trainwreck of a story about the absentee parents wanting to use OP's wedding as an opportunity to introduce everyone to their third, I have thoughts lol. Speaking as someone in a fairly functional throuple sitch-- I've been married to my husband since 2017, he has had a lovely girlfriend for about a year and a half and we're both allowed to see other people if we so choose-- it's NO EXCUSE. Choose another damn day to make introductions, idgaf have a family barbecue or something and announce it then. I HATE it when people try to use other people's happy days for their own means, especially when it hasn't been discussed beforehand and permission wasn't granted. God, these people are supposed to be poly and yet they still don't understand how important communication is?! Straight up narcissistic behavior. Not everything is about you and your relationship! People like OP's bioparents give polyamory and polygamy a bad name. They're lucky they were even invited to the wedding at all with how they selfishly abandoned their child.
Period! I hate that so much when people just want to use one person or couple's special day for their own stage. Birthdays, weddings, bar/bat mitzvahs...If the day ain't about you, sit your @ss down and behave! I'd have told my "parents" that it was the two of them or none of them and that they were being invited as a courtesy. Honestly, I probably would have just told my grandfather that if my "parents" had wanted to be part of my life they would have made the effort beforehand.
You don't owe sh!t to people who haven't even bothered to pick up a phone to talk to you in years. At that point they chose to no longer be a part of your life and you don't have to include them at all. Forcing someone to invite their abandoners or abusers "because they're family" is such a toxic thing to do. They chose to stop being part of your life and having them there just hurts you.
The fat fiancé thing was outrageous and his family was complacent in the whole event they knew his fiancé wasn’t made a bridesmaid or allowed to be in photos and they said nothing.
3:24 hell yeah I’d kick my mom out. She made it clear that she attended the wedding she really wanted her son to have! She can miss this one!
Exactly!! She didn’t even want to be there so he did her a favour
Story 1: mil is so obvious she does not want Helena as op's wife it is more flashy than neons in Las Vegas. She tried to desperately force him to invite ex in laws, comparisons to his previous marriage was to make him doubt and see his past was much better than his future with Helena. Good thing he kicked her out, nta. She crossed all boundaries first, now she does not dare to face the consequences of her actions.
Those are instances I am happy I am single🤣
I'm glad he has found love, and isn't going to be comparing his new wife to his dearly departed first wife. It's not healthy to cling to the past like his mother is doing.
I've dated two men who constantly talked about how perfect their deceased wives were. I broke it off, telling them I hope they find that perfect woman they deserve, but sorry that won't be me.
One man was very nice, wealthy, and he spent so much money taking me out and buying me gifts that it made me uncomfortable and I asked him to please stop because I just enjoy spending time with him and I don't need more things. He bought me an entire new wardrobe of nice dresses, but they were things his wife would have worn. I'm a tomboy type and I'm more comfortable in jeans and cowboy shirts or t-shirts. I hate wearing dresses and high heels and always have because it makes me feel like I'm wearing an uncomfortable costume.
The other man was more recent, and he lives in the same rural community as me. To him, his dead wife was a saint and could do no wrong. After we broke up I was told by other neighbors what his wife was really like. She was an avowed white supremacist who told her son he could only date white women. She was horrible to Nancy, one of my favorite people in our community. Nancy is a school teacher, professional belly dancer, vegan, born in Jamaica and is a very sweet, fun person to be around. Oh, and Nancy is black.
I love the fact that the dead wife's son, now that mama isn't telling him what to do, fell in love and married a woman born in Mexico and they now have two adorable, smart, bilingual children with black hair and brown eyes. They are their grandpa's world, and even he admitted that his wife would have hated them and their mother.
@@LazyIRanch I hope you find someone who would truly cherish you just as you are.
I believe every type of love is different and should not be compared with each other. Bc every person we love is different, we love different traits and characteristics of people surrounding us so it is unfair and it aims to harm to say : I love you better/ or you cannot compare to.. etc.
I believe op' s late wife has special part in his heart and he loved her ; marrying another person is actually a blessing in itself bc it proves he started to believe he can love once again and his current wife does not need to compete with the late one as op's love for her is different . Her place in his life is also secure.
As life progresses and changes, love also got those traits. Op marrying Helena is not to replace an old wife . He is marrying her to be happy and give them both a chance to create a new family and open a new chapter in their lives.
The past should be respected but also should not drag us down. I believe people who loved us and are gone would want us to be happy.
With the widower story, saying his first wife wasn't the love of his life isn't an ahole thing to me at all. He's clearly dealt with his grief and his emotions and he loved his first wife. But sometimes you find something new and realize that what you thought you had before was nothing compared to what you've found now. That's not disparaging, that's living and growing and finding something new and better.
When your parents are narcissist they will do shit like this. Also that first guy isn't an ahole. I'm glad he told his mom to leave that is called setting a boundary. He did nothing wrong
Congratulations Lauren and Brett🎉❤ if the proposal fails you’ll end up in another video
Charlotte, I just want you to know it felt really nice to hear you say you pick 'my' side. I know the talking to the audience thing is something you do literally all the time, and usually I don't really note it, but I had a fall out with a friend recently, and had to go on like nothing happened. I just felt really nice to think for a moment someone had my back to the exclusion of others.
I hope the voluptuous bride has an amazing family and the gorgeous couple can spend all the holidays with them.
Not me running to the comments to see if Lauren has replied yet 😂
Hopefully, congratulations are in order! 🎉 Charlotte, you're so sweet to do that for them! 🥂
Omg the proposal in the beginning 😭😭 this is why I love Charlotte
As someone who has always identified as asexual and is identifying as aromantic due to trauma, these videos really help me deal with the fact that I will 99% probably not have a wedding.
"aromatic". I think maybe you meant a different word although I'm sure you smell delicious
*aromantic" " I assume you're not benzene
@@Birdbike719 😂 Omg I read it correctly at first. Damn, I wish trauma did just make us smell good.
I've been married for sixteen years, and I have never regretted my $25 courthouse wedding (where about ten couples got married one at a time) for one second! ❤
have a wedding to yourself!!
My mother knows I got engaged and I even showed her the rings prior to getting married. But I did not invite her nor have I told her we had the wedding. When my sister right above me was getting married, it was tough on her to find who to invite because everyone hates my father(he sexually abused me as a child), except my mother. My parents told my sister that they would pay fot a venue for her wedding, but they would re-new their vows at the same time. My sister wasn't going to have that and we went to a different city where our other sister and her family were and got married in the officaite's living room.
When I told my mom I was getting married she said "Oh well I hope I'm invited to your wedding unlike your sister." She thought it was funny when I reminded why she wasn't. She had a stroke since the wedding and is loopy.
I didn't want to invite people, that made my life a living hell, to my best day.
The reason I still haven't told her is I don't want her to get upset over not seeing my wedding. I have worn my ring around her, but she hasn't noticed.
If the bride or groom are unhappy with someone, they should not be forced to have them.
I can honestly see why the first guy did what he did. He doesn’t necessarily think that Helena can replace her but he doesn’t see the point in holding on to the past. You have to move on or you’re just gonna be sad all the time. You gotta pick up and go
Love the proposal idea! Hope she says yes!
The first story, we don’t know what their marriage was like. There was a Reddit story where a man’s wife died and he had to take care of her through her illness as she slowly died of something like cancer. After her death he discovered on her computer that she’d been contacting divorce attorneys and had planned to take him for everything and only when she got sick did she then use him to take care of her. Another one similar and only after her death did he get a letter from his deceased wife that their child may not (and wasn’t) his. So there could be plenty of reasons why he was happier with his new bride then his deceased one
@@MsJubjubbird Agreed. Also had the thought that OP would not have known that his first wife was not the love of his life until he met Helena, who was. It's not just time that can change your perspective, its people too
9:40 lol. If any of my friends got into an argument, I'd tell both sides, "I'm Switzerland, I am neutral." Or "My name is Been it and I aint in it."
I imagine Brett must be the most excited person ever to wait for Charlotte’s latest video to be posted. And then the nerve racking wait for Lauren to open YT and watch the video. 😂
0:11 oh thank goodness she used his last name... can you imagine if she just said "Brett and Lauren" with *no* other details? Every Lauren who is dating a Brett would be freaking out. 😂😂😂
0:30 AWWWEE 🥹 it was the “Weeeeee”s for me - Charlotte is so adorable 🥰
Charlotte, you were wondering about polyamorous relationships. For the past two years, I've been in a poly relationship with a married couple, so I guess I'm the "throuple partner", although in poly terminology, we're called unicorns. I gradually introduced my throuple couple to my family members and eventually invited them to our family Christmas. My family has accepted them and I'm happier than I've ever been (I'm 44), so yes, relationships like this can work :)
The proposal is adorable ❤ Hope she says yes! 😊
If choosing a side means being a decent human being, then pick a side.
I hope Lauren's answer is her own, and not due to this super public proposal. ❤ Whether it's yes or no, I hope the outcome is how it's supposed to be, by speaking her truth. 🙏🏻
Well, one shouldn’t propose unless they know what the answer will be…
Don't think you should use a third party to propose either!
@@lizmarin9568 i don't know. I think its kinda cute and obviously they are big Charlotte fans. Not much different than having a celebrity at a concert or something do the same thing.
@@Birdbike719 yeah, if it’s something they talked about and it’s more of a point of when the question is coming, i think using a common interest like this is really cute!
To me this isn't a public proposal because they aren't on the spot to say yes like if there was a jumbotron or they were in a restaurant or something.
While the ask is in this way, the moment will be private for them when they watch it. I don't think there's any pressure to say yes from this gesture.