I totally relate to that. When you miss the love and support from people that are supposed to provide it for you (parents, family) it really hurts especially when you're a grown up, you feel ashamed. I made the choice to avoid them in order to give myself respect but it is hard. Luckily enough since 2 years I spend christmas with my grandma who is alone as well, and such a sweetheart, and I get to enjoy christmas again. Not partying but just a peacefull christmas with someone who love and respect me, and it's already a lot ! Regarding getting intoxicated to get through rough times, it doesn't work for me, it makes the bad mood worse, but whatever floats your boats as they say :) Despite all the set backs I do have the same hopes as you, I believe things can change in a medium/long term future, I believe I can find a life partner, make kids, have a nice family life (and have animals !). Obviously it will be harder and take longer than most people to get there, but I do with the cards that have been distributed to me. Cheers from France, wish you the best
@marsooh3002 we gotta make choices that serve us, I've def gotten caught up in guilt before which is unnecessary. Hold onto the vision! Life can be beautiful and magical, and yes it might take those like us longer but maybe it'll be all the more sweet when it happens ❤❤ appreciate your comment and you sharing your perspective.
Mam I know exactly what you’re saying. I have had days I had to break it down to minutes and hrs. I love my little dog too. “Success is achieved by those who try and keep trying” quote by W.Clement Stone. 1 of my favorites.❤❤ New support for you. Happy Thanksgiving!! 9:51
@@CreatingChangeGB Today was one of those touch and go days, but very proud I stayed sober! Love that quote. Thanks for checking out my channel and keep sharing your stories. ❤️❤️
awww River~~~ Yeah, Reality Transurfing has changed my life, specifically about repeating to yourself, "everything is turning out as it should" and "your world takes care of you". I'm sad to hear that you're so angry sometimes which turns into sadness but please keep posting these, it's good to hear your thoughts Melissa. I'm glad you have River :) You are loved, Melissa.
@PaulYuNow it's such a good book isn't it! I'm just finding it for the first time and it highlights a lot of concepts I've intuitively felt or reflected on from things not working in my favor. Appreciate your comment 🥺🙏🫂
@@HealingConversation-bp1kz being alone on a holiday just feels full of shame for some reason, normally I don't mind being alone. I'm sorry your Holiday wasn't so great, I also want to express sympathy for the cancer diagnosis. 🙏 can't imagine how scary that must be.
Good whatever time of day it is (i think you are about 7 hrs behind me?). Firstly, can i say that River is just beautiful, she is a similar colour to my Red Fox labrador, Amber. Can I ask a question? When you talk about holidaying alone, do you mean Thanksgiving, or holidaying in general?
@@stevegill1157 im in the Pacific time zone in the states. Looked up the breed of Amber, I bet she is gorgeous! When I say holidays I mean mostly Christmas and Thanksgiving. I've had different seasons in life, when I was younger used to party with friends on other holidays, do a couple friends givings. I moved to a new state last year and have been having a death/rebirth internal situation happening over the last three years. Also been mostly single the last three years just going through a different kind of period in life.
Not really on topic...but dogs always love me...I can usually connect right away with dogs even if other people are afraid of them...I just don't fear them at all... On the subject of holidays....lol...I got nothing...its such a crap shoot...
Animal companions remind me of daemons from the golden compass. It's intersting that their reflection in that series was of opposite gender. Also great series on hbo. Almost all substances are medicine. But, if you have to use medicine then are you really healing?
@@ethanlankes1433 haven't heard of that movie in a long time. I feel I have the personality of golden retreiver and that my dog feels like my "soul dog" others have pointed this out too or they we look alike. I've had mixed perspectives on substances. I used a variety for a long time, I don't these days. Its hard to say what's better, I feel I go through more suffering now but giving myself space to see if it's just a needed release that I was avoiding - intuitively I think it's that, time will tell. Have you used substances to mitigate your suffering?
@IlluminateYourPower I started smoking pot when I was 16. It really opened me up emotionally. I could feel connected to the inspiration an artist had in their creative self expressions such as movies or music and writings/books. I use caffine to over come depression. Which is more like no passion for life. I feel pretty stagnant internally if I don't excersize or play instruments or smoke weed. Alcohol is fun sometimes but it takes too much of a toll on my body. I'd prefer to be able to be active. Mushrooms completely opened me up and I downloaded like so many past life experiences. Think about how old zues is and then like be connected to about 15 of those lifetimes. Nicotine is nice for headaches and constipation. I did discover that weed puts my blocks and my inner demons to sleep so I could explore them from a higher perspective. I'm sober now and my focus is removing those things I choose to suffer from. You know, subconscious limiting belive systems. Self worth yadda yada yada. Sex too. Abstinence can really point at the areas of the mind we wish to avoid/bypass leave unhealed. I use sleeping and isolation as away to avoid suffering. I mean t.v. or video games. Any type of escape really. There's no owners manual for the human vessel. They're just a walking chemistry experiment. I know how I want to feel and I know several different ways of achieving a flow state. I rarely accomplish that but, I'm happy with how I feel most of the time. I don't feel bad for wanted to isolate or rest when I need it.
I totally relate to that. When you miss the love and support from people that are supposed to provide it for you (parents, family) it really hurts especially when you're a grown up, you feel ashamed. I made the choice to avoid them in order to give myself respect but it is hard. Luckily enough since 2 years I spend christmas with my grandma who is alone as well, and such a sweetheart, and I get to enjoy christmas again. Not partying but just a peacefull christmas with someone who love and respect me, and it's already a lot !
Regarding getting intoxicated to get through rough times, it doesn't work for me, it makes the bad mood worse, but whatever floats your boats as they say :)
Despite all the set backs I do have the same hopes as you, I believe things can change in a medium/long term future, I believe I can find a life partner, make kids, have a nice family life (and have animals !). Obviously it will be harder and take longer than most people to get there, but I do with the cards that have been distributed to me.
Cheers from France, wish you the best
@marsooh3002 we gotta make choices that serve us, I've def gotten caught up in guilt before which is unnecessary.
Hold onto the vision! Life can be beautiful and magical, and yes it might take those like us longer but maybe it'll be all the more sweet when it happens ❤❤ appreciate your comment and you sharing your perspective.
river is so cute!
@motet2179 River says thank you!! 🐶
Mam I know exactly what you’re saying. I have had days I had to break it down to minutes and hrs. I love my little dog too. “Success is achieved by those who try and keep trying” quote by W.Clement Stone. 1 of my favorites.❤❤ New support for you. Happy Thanksgiving!! 9:51
@@CreatingChangeGB Today was one of those touch and go days, but very proud I stayed sober! Love that quote. Thanks for checking out my channel and keep sharing your stories. ❤️❤️
awww River~~~ Yeah, Reality Transurfing has changed my life, specifically about repeating to yourself, "everything is turning out as it should" and "your world takes care of you". I'm sad to hear that you're so angry sometimes which turns into sadness but please keep posting these, it's good to hear your thoughts Melissa. I'm glad you have River :) You are loved, Melissa.
@PaulYuNow it's such a good book isn't it! I'm just finding it for the first time and it highlights a lot of concepts I've intuitively felt or reflected on from things not working in my favor. Appreciate your comment 🥺🙏🫂
I was alone 😢 it sucks 😂 My daughters a band in May when I found out I had breast cancer
@@HealingConversation-bp1kz being alone on a holiday just feels full of shame for some reason, normally I don't mind being alone. I'm sorry your Holiday wasn't so great, I also want to express sympathy for the cancer diagnosis. 🙏 can't imagine how scary that must be.
Good whatever time of day it is (i think you are about 7 hrs behind me?). Firstly, can i say that River is just beautiful, she is a similar colour to my Red Fox labrador, Amber.
Can I ask a question? When you talk about holidaying alone, do you mean Thanksgiving, or holidaying in general?
@@stevegill1157 im in the Pacific time zone in the states. Looked up the breed of Amber, I bet she is gorgeous! When I say holidays I mean mostly Christmas and Thanksgiving. I've had different seasons in life, when I was younger used to party with friends on other holidays, do a couple friends givings. I moved to a new state last year and have been having a death/rebirth internal situation happening over the last three years. Also been mostly single the last three years just going through a different kind of period in life.
Not really on topic...but dogs always love me...I can usually connect right away with dogs even if other people are afraid of them...I just don't fear them at all...
On the subject of holidays....lol...I got nothing...its such a crap shoot...
@bucstime1270 I love that! I'm the same way ❤️
Yeah holidays are weirrrd. 😂
Animal companions remind me of daemons from the golden compass. It's intersting that their reflection in that series was of opposite gender. Also great series on hbo.
Almost all substances are medicine. But, if you have to use medicine then are you really healing?
@@ethanlankes1433 haven't heard of that movie in a long time. I feel I have the personality of golden retreiver and that my dog feels like my "soul dog" others have pointed this out too or they we look alike.
I've had mixed perspectives on substances. I used a variety for a long time, I don't these days. Its hard to say what's better, I feel I go through more suffering now but giving myself space to see if it's just a needed release that I was avoiding - intuitively I think it's that, time will tell. Have you used substances to mitigate your suffering?
@IlluminateYourPower I started smoking pot when I was 16. It really opened me up emotionally. I could feel connected to the inspiration an artist had in their creative self expressions such as movies or music and writings/books. I use caffine to over come depression. Which is more like no passion for life. I feel pretty stagnant internally if I don't excersize or play instruments or smoke weed. Alcohol is fun sometimes but it takes too much of a toll on my body. I'd prefer to be able to be active. Mushrooms completely opened me up and I downloaded like so many past life experiences. Think about how old zues is and then like be connected to about 15 of those lifetimes. Nicotine is nice for headaches and constipation. I did discover that weed puts my blocks and my inner demons to sleep so I could explore them from a higher perspective. I'm sober now and my focus is removing those things I choose to suffer from. You know, subconscious limiting belive systems. Self worth yadda yada yada. Sex too. Abstinence can really point at the areas of the mind we wish to avoid/bypass leave unhealed. I use sleeping and isolation as away to avoid suffering. I mean t.v. or video games. Any type of escape really. There's no owners manual for the human vessel. They're just a walking chemistry experiment. I know how I want to feel and I know several different ways of achieving a flow state. I rarely accomplish that but, I'm happy with how I feel most of the time. I don't feel bad for wanted to isolate or rest when I need it.
Hi friend
@@charlynestyles hi 👋