When you spend your entire childhood trying to get the best grades or get beaten up, then to work 12 hours a day 6 days a week getting paid barely enough to afford housing. Alot of people would probably choose to spend whatever free time they have left to themselves. Or not have any time to build a relationship at all.
Exactly. They wanna use the time to unwind, worry about themselves, have fun. Not to mention they might take what they dealt with and realize that putting their kid through that is not what they want. That and you gotta factor in the high expectations in the dating market.
I don't think it is just China. From observing videos of young adults in a variety of countries I see a trend of not wanting to bring children into a world with a future that seems more and more uncertain, and I certainly cannot blame them.
It’s mostly because I can’t even afford to live on my own with the high cost of living, so getting married and having kids is just not possible for me.
Yeah, it's sad, cause, I'm surely not the only one, but I really want kids. But I'm scared to have kids in a world that simply won't be suitable for even just one innocent life to thrive happily in. I know that certain countries can be better than others though, and so if I can atleast move to the UK, (I'm American, born 2001) then maybe there's a better chance in the social climate. But even then, there's so much left to be improved, for a person to CHOOSE to have kids with the view of someone in my demographic. *Edit* If thinking money based, economy, etc. Then, yes the U.S may be better in my case. But *personally* that makes up the half of a good environment. The happiness and safety, and such that I want, includes a places societal values, morals, if they treat people that are different or hell, exactly the same as them but have one opinion different to theirs. Wealth and stability in the monetary sense is what will surely set up a good foundation for a family, but if the world outside the little bubble of my nice home in the suburbs, is a minefield, then, I'm basically just as hesitant. I've found the couple of replies very informative and (surprisingly for a yt comment) an actually pleasant mini conversation. I appreciate your common courtesy. If the every day, small arguments and large issues were debated and spoken about in the same manner we have, I'd be happy almost anywhere. ✌️
My young fried just said "Have babies for what? So my babies become the next working force of the nation? Basicly the next slaves to make few billionares to be richer while my kids life are miserable? " "No I won't have kids just because society needs new slaves." I do not blame her this is not a good enviroment. My respect to her , I do admire the courage to stand up and live her life the way she think is the best for her.
@@bluegrays9872 Lmao, it doesn't matter what it is. The issue could be that a species of flower is disappearing from the world and women and feminism would still be blamed for it. You'll always be a scapegoat as a woman so you might as well do whatever you want. The last thing this planet needs is more people. Not to mention that society doesn't need unwanted children who suffer with parents who had them because of social pressure and now resent them. Enough with sad, apathetic mothers and useless, absent fathers. If you have a kid or kids that better be your fcking DREAM. If it's not, forget it. Don't torture yourself and others.
@@bluegrays9872 and it's true, many women simply don't want to have children. They are finally free from being baby factories for men who want a fanily
So not having children is a backlash agains the elites? Isn't that also the point and purpose of those same elites? To reduce the population of the plebeians? It seems it's the elites who are influencing these decisions either way.
I'm Asian American. My family did everything they could to provide for me and made so many sacrifices for me to to have a brighter future and I am forever grateful and in awe of them. However, I still grew up very poor and I grew up with the absence of any real adult in my childhood due to them working extensively to survive. Even though my family sacrificed everything for me to not worry about money, I was acutely aware of my family's financial situation and it became a stress and obsession to be financially stable. I now have a comfortable job and future, but at the cost of a carefree childhood and the absence of parental presence. I would never want kids unless I can afford the time and money to nurture them.
I don't know,, but I just want to comment. I just want to tell you, Jesus loves you. He is close to the broken hearted. I mean well. Please understand. Jesus is the only faithful pure love one can know. A prayer to him on your behalf. God bless you abundantly with peace, love and joy.
The obsession with profits at all costs is destroying the basic family structure. Government-trained strangers raise our children in America because both parents are required to work in order to maintain a basic standard of living. Long-term Mothering is looked down upon. Capitalism has labeled us all worthless in one way or another unless we subjugate ourselves to the whims of the elite.
I feel the same. Sometimes I am so hard on myself so my parents don’t get disappointed. I know they love me but the way of loving me was not really what I needed it when I was a kid. Good luck!❤️
@@lisak1895 I agree... Jesus is there for everyone.. Every single child who dies of starvation or is in pain because they can't afford medicine.. Jesus is always there. When people lose their homes and have no place to go.. They can always go to the church who will provide food and accommodation for everyone.. Don't worry about money.. Just make babies.. Because Jesus is there for everyone.. Including the children who die in war... Money is of this world... Even if you have suffered here your entire life it doesn't matter.. There's an eternal life that awaits.
The first two minutes made me laugh out loud. We're watching a country designed from the ground up to discourage people from marrying and they all like, "why won't people get married?"
Thats insane i agree the whole set up makes marriage and children unappealing yet they see the problem sort of mostly economically and now want ppl to have kids without making it easier or cost effective! Good luck with that!
What an ignorant comment. 🙄Another "negative" statement to make another country look bad. This is a global trend, not just happening particularly in China. There are a lot of contributing factors why people now a days are less likely to get married and/or have a family - social, financial, logistical, etc...
The hell with society. A child should be brought into this world because the parent(s) wanted to raise a person with love and provide them with the resources to have the best shot at a fulfilling life. If you want someone to help take care of you when you're old, hire a caretaker. People who aren't equipped to raise children end up doing so (at the detriment of the children) due to societal expectations and tradition.
In China it's very difficult to find a job after 35 as there's requirement of age and gender in almost all the job advertisement. They can do that simply because there's too many people. The professor being interviewed in this video has been promoting Population Crisis in the last decade. But China is NOT lack of labour. They can refuse people over 35 to apply for a job because they can still receive hundreds/thousands of application from under-35s- for one position. They want more babies because they want cheap labours in the next generation. Women are most likely to be blamed when there is less and less babies born each year. However China has a very high rate of marriage among females and more than 99% of women get married at least once in their life and most of them have at least one child. Because of sex selective abortion since 90s, there are 20 millions gap between male and female population between age 20-50. Less women means less mums and less uterus means less babies. Chinese culture prefers boys but unfortunately due to the obvious biological reason boys can't produce next generation without a wife. Lack of babies is Karma of murdering unborn/born girls.
@@Albapurified I'm not sure what you are talking about. But if you are talking about one child policy, it never involved jail. And some people choose to kill the baby girl at 3-4 months pregnancy when they find out the sex. To make sure the only child will be a boy, they keeps killing until it's a boy and then he could be born. Some women get abortion for 2-6 times in order to have a boy. So it's the "first" child they kill, not the second one. And even now a lot of Chinese families who live out of China are still do the same. There's no one child policy in Australia, but the sex ratio of new born is as same as in China. One child policy has been removed for a decade, but the new born sex ratio is not getting better, instead, it's getting worse. Sex ratio has always been a problem in China and it's not about the current government. China is a only country that be involved into WW2 still had more men than women after the wars. Looking at official records, at anytime of the history, there was always more men than women and sometimes in a city men can be double of the women.
My friends/penpals who live in Japan, China, and South Korea moved from the cities to the countryside. It really did wonders for their health. They are’t paying for an outrageously overpriced house or apartment, no back breaking, mind numbing, pressure cooker, rat race of a career, no kids to take care of, not having to worry about being on time. They love it. It feels like an “Animal Crossing” lifestyle.
Very true. People used to work to provide for their family but now people find family a hinderance to continue work. Most people don't even know what they are working for. Soon we will have another world war where we will realize that material wealth would mean nothing if you don't have people to support you. This cycle will repeat again and again. Guess this is the curse of humanity.
@@mr.uthamaputhiran9790 When most basic needs are met but anything beyond that is years long trek of saving and investing money only to expirience recession and inflation every 20 years or so. That money you saved is at least worth half of what it used to be in those 20 years yet you need to save 20-40 years for a house and in those 20-40 years so many things can happen that would render your hardships as useless and pointless. That many people give up before trying to save money for 20-40 years to come that will essentially make them a slave without chains for best half of their lives. Nobody wants to be a slave.
Eventually what's going to happen is the state assigning man and woman pairings, then force them to "Mate" under supervision, then force them to produce children until the female's body fails.
@@mandolen3317 How? The one child policy was implemented before China experienced the economic miracle. The government wanted to reduce and end poverty while gradually introducing prosperity. It is called a rock and a hard place. I think they did the right thing.
@@yaggaman1914 Not really. Korean women from DPRK are despearte to escape fat kim regime and China new prosperity is too tempting. Even Russians , laos, filipinos are increasingly found in China major cities. What the government might do is relax marriages of women born abroad.
I fully agree with this. Over half of the money I make after taxes from a full-time job would get eaten up by the average rent for a one-bedroom apartment in my area. It’s quite impossible for me to afford being able to fall in love and have a family…
@@KabobHope Yes. But also, it's not really fine. Most people very understandably do not want to live in a van. I know you're not the one who made the suggestion I'm just saying I hate it when that's someone's response to a person saying they can't afford normal basic living. Imagine if someone told our parents or grandpatents to just live out of a vehicle.
"What I pursue in life is my own creative freedom" . . . that says it all. No matter how rigid previous era cultural rules may have been, this is a different era. You can't force someone to "fall in love" with a preselected mate who mechanically fits the expected checked boxes on a clipboard, these times are different. People do want to fall in love, but in their own ways, with someone they actually are in love with, and actually have a real marriage, not just a quasi arranged one. For some, maybe not getting married at all is what works for them. Also, the crushing cost of raising a family is very different than in previous times, it's not for everyone. Welcome to the 21st century . . .
They say population decline is a problem, yet at the same time, the population is too huge and there are not enough jobs for everyone. They want to keep the labor cheap and disposable, which is why they need the unemployment rate to be high. They encourage fierce competition in the lower classes for the scarce amount of jobs, while the ruling classes enjoy the luxury of little to no competition, and a monopolistic life. The high unemployment rate is hence not a problem for them but a design of the system.
I do not think it is only in China. I see that more young adults are choosing freedom and life experiences over marriage and having families. As society life becomes more expensive and more dangerous. We will see more people choosing to be child free.
You can have freedom and life experiences first and marry later if you wish. Also not everyone is equipped to have children. In the U.S. they marry later, so they can have an education, career, a house.
You are so right. I told my granddaughter that young adults now are happy to call their dogs and cats their children. If they do decide to have babies, it is usually one. Times are changing and Its their lives.
Essentially we simply aren't sure of our relationships to last economic instability and for our other half not to abandon ship when they feel that it sinks. Even if they are to blame for that instability. Add to this economic instability and unhealthy work environment of 10-12 h a day six days a week just to live. Add to it no social security or barely any for new families with kids. Like barely any free care for them. When I feel that there is barely any possibility to have children in my country. And I have seen just a tip of what it is like in China. My country is at least 2 times better in this regard to rising children and living expenses.
5:05 "I feel sad...She (mom) doesn't care what kind of person I am, whether I am a good person, what I like and what my dream is. The most important thing for her is to have a son who earns a lot of money so he can marry a wife." Mom feels greatly humiliated compared to other people, because son has no wife or kids. Such superficial pride in materialism.
I do not have children. I struggled financially as a child and I do not think it is fair to do that to another innocent person. The world feels out of control and unsafe, so that is a sentiment that many people I know share. #Childfree
People do not understand that. It drives me mad when losers like black American men curse women who do not want to get married, saying they will die alone. Not everybody has been fortunate enough to have a background conducive to marriage and babies. I am glad I am not the only one feeling the way you have stated so thank you.
I agree 100%. I also grew up in a financially unstable home. The world is in a state of chaos and everything is getting more expensive. I don't think it's wise to have children in this environment.
@@vickyk8014 nope the limited resources of the planet is reserved for the Elites & their kids. Its a well planned move not just in china, AI gonna take over most jobs so a lot of "locusts" as they call us, gotta go
I'm a Chinese national who left China when I was 6 with my parents and we never looked back. I'm now happily married with my husband with a son. So glad my parents made the decision to leave China in 1998. We are not wealthy when we left but they worked so hard abroad and I was able to get my masters degree. It's really sad watching this because this could have been me.
5:06 Yes, for a lot of Asian parents, your job and your marriage are important. Other stuff don't matter. From experience, mine does not care about my wellbeing, just how much "face" I brought to the family, how much "humiliation" I would bring if I do something that is no-no, and how much I earn.
This is true across many Asian cultures including both East and South Asia. Parents don't give 2 shites about their kids health or happiness. It's all about reputation and status so they can brag, effectively reducing the child to a trophy.
I had similar situations but managed to get a job and moved far away and only see my family sometime. I spent my savings and free time exploring the world. No childcare, no mortgage, the world is my home because I don't have a firm roots
For the same reason many other nation's populations aren't having children. Corporations have drained all of the resources from the middle class. They don't have the time or funds to raise a family.
I feel so light after reading many of these comments of like minded ppl. I m married for 10 years and do not have children. When my mom tells me they were 6 siblings n my grandpa couldn’t pay for her school but I should b happy because she paid for mine, I said grandpa is not a good father nd I was barely 10-12 then. I was scolded. Even now ppl lecture me to have a child otherwise who will take care of me n I say they r not retirement plan. Thank god I m not the only one.
I so have heard these things from Indian aunties and people not that much older than me. Like having kids will guarantee that u have someone taking care of u in old age. And it is such a selfish reason to have kids.
@@kanikagaral7637 But familial motivations aside, isn't it kinda true though? Many nations are struggling with pensions and the retirement age because the nation does not have enough children to take care of its elderly. When you get old, you slowly lose your strength and capacity to act on your own. How will we survive then? Trough welfare? But welfare is just the children of the nation. No children, no welfare, and the retirement age gets pushed furter and further ahead. There is no escape. Unless a way is discovered to remain strong in old age, we will always need young people. Saying they are just a strain on our current ressources is being narrow-sighted.
@@TheUrizenstop it. Do you know how high demand the market will be for elderly folk paying total strangers to care for them??!! Pricing will be brutal and many wont have kids to care for them. So they will create a whole new demand in the workplace
@@kanikagaral7637 For the same reason we are supposed to care for children and the disabled: because they can't do it for themselves. If we are not in any obligation to care for the elderly, then you might as well cancel the pension fund and let nature get rid of the old geezers.
People don't realize a lot of kids in China stay at school in the dorms and study from morning until literal night from Monday till Saturday, then they get 1 day at home. Their schools are more on rote repetition-based learning and about getting the highest grades instead of focusing on learning. Then after that you're supposed to go to university to slave away again for a degree, then after their degree they find that they struggle to find jobs and if they get them it's barely enough to make ends meet while being told 996 (9am-9pm, 6 days a week) is the ideal standard of life. Not only did the housing developers and banks screw them over (I hope you saw what happened with the scandals lately; I'm referring to those), then their government fucks them over on so many things while stomping on their voices. Slaving away from childhood in the schools to avoid being beaten up, to barely making it in the workforce, to those who throw in the towel, would you blame them? 996 as an objective standard is disgusting. You are literally no different from a slave with that sort of mentality (especially if you are not actually pursuing something that you are passionate about). China Chinese are oppressed, but a lot of them are not stupid. Those who are not brainwashed run to other countries, and CCP China is panicking because people literally can't afford children either financially or mentally, and people are LEAVING. With the advent of the internet and opening of borders, they can censor whatever they want, but it is inevitable this would happen. EDIT: University in China is cheaper.
Unfortunately only the rich and extremely high skilled worker can leave… Everyone wants their child to earn lots but the country need tons of low level workers. All this while businesses kept paying dirt to said workers.
Speaking like a true ignoramus. You have no idea about China's education system do you? Rote learning was never a thing, it was something created by American to explain why Asians get better grades
There are very few students in boarding schools. China has school districts. During compulsory education, you will be assigned to a nearby school and you can walk to and from school.
@@irone7050 I want to live like a billionaire but my wants aren't feasible. A baby is a second mortgage in many countries (and China is no exception), 20 years ago it was still possible to raise a child in semi poverty, nowadays it's impossible.
media keeps preaching about it, government, businessmen and those in power because they worry about their bottom line and having to think of a solution. if billionaires needs 1000 workers to run a factory at poor pay and inhumane shift, they should make their own babies since they can. we really should focus on our own lives and happiness and not what media and so called "greater" good for a sacrifice that's too unfair for us.
When China was poor, parents needed kids to help with the farm or the store. Now that China is no longer poor, people want to enjoy life. Kids are expensive and take time of what precious little time and money the working class has left outside of work.
Population sizes shrinking due to low birthrates is the most humane way to solve Earth's human overpopulation issues. It'll cause economic upheaval for sure, but I genuinely think that the end result with be positive. A lower population means that companies will no longer be able to get away scott-free with treating human beings as disposable livestock.
Daydreamer: Don't kid yourself. Companies will HERD the remaining population and you WILL be livestock (their captive consumers). Logic seems to be absent in your calculations.
Thankfully, my mom has always discouraged me from having children. She never wanted children, she was pressured into it by people around her. She says when she saw me have a hard time at school when I was 10, I asked her if I could be un-birthed. She wished she had never succumbed to that pressure. I have witnessed my mom's life through financial instability, through motherhood, through being yelled at but having to keep her head down for her children. I will never repeat that for her peace of mind.
I am sorry that you suffered and I hope you are okay now. So that not to regret later, please think what is your desire irrespective of your mother's feelings. Maybe you would feel happy having children. Sending hugs 🤗
@@teodoramb7503 That person gave a thoughtful response. They seem sure of what they want and why. You don't need to tell them they might regret it and children might make them happy. You're not talking to an idiot.
Sounds like your mom is doing to you what people around her did to her. Ultimately, it is your choice to have children or not. Your mom's trauma doesn't need to be your burden but I don't know you or your mom so, all the best
Education changes everything. Chinese youth these days are highly educated so they no longer view marriage as a necessity. This is no difference than what happened in other advanced economies.
True and I heard story of raising a child in China now cost 3 times compared to other nations. I also heard story of a guy who lost his fiancée and abortion carried out by her parent all because the apartment he bought will never finish. Now he lost everything.
@@romeoalfa7187 Yes, he is referring to the lan wei (烂尾 ) building video, can search for it under CNA insider "The Great Fall Of China's Housing Market".
5:20 Imagine your mom feeling "humiliated" because you choose how to live your own life, the nonsense is real. Marriage and children are a burden and young people know it, this is why they stay childfree.
A person lives only once. Live how you want to, have a kid or don't.. Remember you're not obliged to societal constraints because it's not their lifestyle you're forced to live but your own.
All over the world, ppl didn't want children for a lot of reasons. But in China, there are a thousand reason why ppl don't want kids. First, they lived through stressful environment where childrens are competing since they're so young. I'm sure they don't want their kids to live through that.
It really becomes a burden to most women. I don't know many married women who are truly happy and free to do whatever they want, even something simple as rest. No one takes care of you but you are expected to take care of others for the rest of your life. No thanks.
@@minahm4069 as a woman, this is literally why i avoid marriage or having children... I have my own life to live, and I just want to chill and enjoy myself, thanks :) if government wants kids, they can set up free caregiving facilities and that'll help lessen burden on society
Chinese parenting: Don’t care if your child is happy or not, whether he is a good person with value or not, the only important thing is to earn more money and start a family, don’t care if the couples like each other or not lmao
So true. They just wan their son to bring in a daughter in law to do all the chores and serve them then make some grandsons so they can boast about how happy and successful their family is to their frens and relatives.
@@l_ifeefi_l1998 to be fair though, Chinese parents will help look after your grandchildren so you save loads of money on hiring babysitters. Plus they also cook you food all the time if you live nearby or visit.
I am glad this guy has decided to do his own thing and not follow the demands of society or his culture, he is definitely thinking about his happiness and mental health first.
I have 2 kids and I kept telling them please no grandkids for me thanks. Just go do whatever they like and be happy even if they want to lay flat. Life is too short to worry too much.
Marriage is no guarantee of happiness. People should do whatever makes them happy rather than sacrificing their happiness to their parents, companies, government and society. I feel terribly sorry for the woman who has to worry about her two sons now and in the future. This, to me, is not living; I would rather be dead than be in her unfortunate situation. I feel the couples who adopt pets are the wisest and mentally healthiest, and they seem genuinely joyful with their decision not to want children. They will likely live a better life than the depressed and anxious woman with three sons (including her husband).
Family is great source of happiness, as you have companions of all ages to fulfil your life and share your success and support you in failures. It works for most of the world.
Considering 50% of marriage in China ended up in divorce and some even said once they have a child, they already fulfilled their obligation to carry on the family name. Yes, lots of marriage is not of love, but pressures from families, relatives and more.
l agree:marriage is an option,not a goal or a prize; but the issue is:what would happen if every Chinese adult chose pets instead of children?I wonder ...and yes,the mother's husband is a childish moron
@@keerthisureshseelam not really a source of happiness if the said family can't afford to eat three healthy meals a day or send all the offspring to school without each parent working two jobs.
I came to the US from China when I was 20 alone. Spent years years to get a degree while having a part time job and then get a good job. Tried to fit in here. No time to date anyone in my 20s. Now I am an independent single 34 female and it’s so hard for me to settle for less putting more things on my shoulders.
Yikes, its other women who took advantage of men who ruined the simple life for simple ladies. Amber Heard being the spitting image of that. Now men like me are cautious of what the opposite sex might do to us. Oh well.
Putting all the eggs in one basket is never a good idea, even if it is your own children. There is also no guarantee that your children will be successful. Everyone is unique and are born with different gifts, and if your child is not suited to these factory farming education systems then you're literally tossing your money down the drain. Also putting that much burden on the shoulders of young children is unfair. It will have very serious consequences and they may even grow up to hate their own parents. I've seen too many relatives and friends brought up in these kinds of situations and they don't even say hi to their parents on the phone now.
@BlackBannerz It's the truth, not even God forces us to marriage. Real happiness comes from Christ and from knowing who you are. If you are not happy by yourself, what makes you think that being with someone else will fix that? Especially when women carry the burden of taking care of others and less of themselves. Or the spouse that has to work most of the day, almost every day just to eat, pay the bills and feed the children. That's not a life. Just because many of us came from that, doesn't mean it's a real life. Everyone should have good financial conditions, mental health and stability, to carry out the huuuge responsibility that is marriage and children. It's not something you should do due to peer pressure. Especially by people who will not help you carry that responsibility.
Why should they? To benefit a society that doesn't reward them with anything but promises of 'one day you'll be rewarded'? Which applies to everyone in the world!
With a 1 Child Policy, you guaranteed a generation or so of Chinese will not have partners. The last generations' parents couldn't replace themselves. If you DO have a daughter, she may be pressured to achieve whatever a son would have, or provide whatever old-age security they would have anticipated from a son among many other things. Very often, so called "top-shelf people", as is suggested, tend to emigrate, further depleting the marriage-able market. I have seen the week end dating markets where parents also shop for possible mates, which makes me so sad.
Every government in the world needs to organize workplace childcare, Flexi hours or jobshares for women, work from home and study from home for young mothers and young children. Without these measures, no intelligent women will have children.
Not to mention no truly intelligent women will have children without true equality where the father shares the same burden because the mother is NOT the only parent. Put your body on the line to have a kid, put your health and your life on the line and then put your livelihood on the line too. No.
I agree with this, making a living in modern society will not get any easier, so if governments want societies to continue in a healthy way, they need to invest in means for citizens to be productive AND happy, even with familial responsibility. Its definitely true that remote work makes this much easier to achieve, parents can set their work schedule around childcare. But employers have to be flexible and think outside the box for such things to work.
@@apopuffkin1717 Countries with generous parental leave (including paternal leave) and subsidized daycare create better flexibility for both parents. It gives both parents time to be with their kids and a safe, social place for their children while the parents work.
It’s help if the chinese government stop passing laws and regulations counter to what people need and want. I’m glad I no longer live in China because everybody have been bamboozled to live life for the sake of someone else, and many can’t handle the reality that life can be more than what they have always known. I hope more Chinese people in China would be like those men and women featured here.
Confirm you have lousy character that forget the person that dig the well. If China have not slowly open up, do u think u can be here? LKY said China will be a great nation in less that 50 year. I trust his vision.
I notice that too. it's always about the greater good. but actually for the good of minority at a sacrifice that's not worth it at the end because nothing of value will be with you and your loved ones after the sacrifices for this subjective greater good.
@@Maya-sv1pz Ccp's mentality is always 'greater good for the state', it ignores the individual's needs and wants. When they ask 'why no children being made', they dont seem to realise its because the average mainlander is expected to serve the state and not disappoint their parents. How the hell do you have a family, much less fall in love when such a thing is expected?
When the economy is bad people don't have the luxury of marriage for love (that is if they aren't already in love) and usually have to decide their and their possible childrens future based on how much they can afford. This younger generation grew up with impossible expectations placed on them. Anyone who is forced their whole childhood to be perfect will ultimately seek freedom once they're adults over what they were forced to be and do since it wasn't pleasant. I say good on them for standing up for themselves and their freedom. China really dug their own hole by forcing their people to do their whims for so long.
If I was living under such a strict dictatorship I wouldn’t want to have kids either. And if people are unhappy, sex is not really the resulting activity. When your every move is watched and monitored, it’s very hard to relax. Plus everyone is too fussy these days.
Iris Chen said she want a guy with a higher salary and must be over 1.75cm. If she is able to find that guy don't be surprised if he says he wants a younger women not someone over 37 years older
A perfect example of a woman needs to seriously look at herself in front of a mirror or two. She is out of touched, obnoxious, delusional, and perhaps arrogance to no where! She doesn't realize her time is up, and run out of time for her!
If she wants to get married she needs to find a foreigner. I know single nerdy males from the West who have gone to China and come back with a wife. Their wife has hunted them down. 🤣
I always thought the one child policy was stupid because of their driven need to keep the family line and mostly the wanted to keep the males and how they adopted out females who did they think their boys would marry and have children with? Many girls left the country in the adoption so how the regime thought this would work?🤷🏻♀️
They were trying to drastically reduce their population growth and it worked and now the downstream effects of that success are becoming clear. The population growth of any group is directly dependent on the number of living females of fertile age. Reduce the number of females and you reduce the size of the population. Farmers have known about this forever. If you're looking at population dynamics (and this is from a purely biological perspective), then the number of males in most mammalian species is only relevant in terms of the amount of resources that those males consume.
@@erinmorash9334 funny you say that I am a farmer and many years ago though by them wanting to keep all males and seem to adopt out the females to other countries mostly who did they think their males would breed with in the future and here we are in the future and as you said the male population is way over the female population. My girlfriend and her hubby adopted a baby girl back 19 years ago from there so I was learning about it from her and there were no males just girls up for adoption when she was waiting. The girl she adopted is absolutely gorgeous inside and out and sadly doesn’t know her exact birthday as she was dumped at an orphanage so they picked a near enough day to how old she looked.
It's indeed a tough situation but the most amusing thing is , it's the first time I hear parents who have sons cribbing about dowry. It's the opposite case in India where having a daughter is frowned upon and parents end up worrying to death. 😅
Speaking the truth, dowry is the price people pay to supplement the attractiveness of the match. It is mostly a leverage in a negotiation. It totally makes sense. Even in India, parents of beautiful women don't pay anything (or nominal wedding costs). The ugly truth is unattractive people (in case of men, even those without basic social, marketing skills are effectively unattractive) exist on both male and female side. The former find themselves unmarried and the latter's parents bribe a reasonable groom to marry their daughter. It is a messed up situation but just a different negotiating environment compared to Westerners or Chinese. I don't get why our people are so self-loathing.
I think it is because there are "missing" women in the country due to the one child policy and the preference for boys. A lot of female babies just went "missing", so now it is hard to find a bride.
@@ttrev007 Yes, I've heard that the one child policy was implemented in part by forced abortions! Also, that out of 1000 voluntary abortions, 999 would be female, as everyone wanted a boy to carry on the family name ... so, over several decades, there's a huge shortage of women and surprisingly, very few people want to emigrate to China these days ... I wonder why???
All these problems exist because the government intervened in the property market too late, after house prices had climbed to extremely high level, which are out of reach of many people.
Many got rich and then got greedy. The CCP pumped money in real estate in a move akin to the Japan model of the late 80s. Back then the hypothetical value of the land where the palace in Kyoto lies was more valuable than the entire real estate market of a whole US big city. Just like Japan in the 90s, I predict a series of decades of economic stagnation and birthrate cratering.
Well, the property became what it is because of the government. In China all lands are owned by the government and they have total control of land prices
No government can beat the objective laws of a market economy. When 1.4 billion people are crowding into Beijing and Shanghai, housing prices cannot be low. The first man in the video and the woman with the children both make difficult choices as expatriates in Shanghai, just like the first generation of Chinese immigrants in the US who bought their homes by washing dishes for decades.
true. I am 31 years old, turning to 32 soon, and I choose to stay single, in a small city. After 5 years working in the States, and with my parents' help, I was able to purchase a big apartment in my hometown and now I have moved in. My apartment is not far from my parents, I now am living with my two cats, working at a small furniture company with very low pay but enough for me and my cats. I don't desire to go to big cities, with all that hustling and bustling, and zero covid policy, life is too tough and I have tasted the hard life when I was alone in the U.S. working my life into the grave. I don't feel like retiring but my previous experiences have cost too much of my energy. I don't know if I am laying flat or letting myself rot... When my parents grow elderly, I will let them move in to my place, and rent their place out. because their apartment is rather old and run down, doesn't have elevator. That's the plan I have for my life...
Same, I'm living with my mom now too, I had a girlfriend and we were supposed to help each other, but it was mostly one sided and I was paying for everything. After losing my job at New Oriental we broke up and now I'm back living with my mom. I don't want to buy an house or apartment through mortgage, risking the apartment not even being finished and ends up a 烂尾楼 I'm lying flat due to covid and double zero, it affected me
@@chanakya_nan Don't know, save up some money and find myself a good retirement home maybe, with nurses stuff... don't know ,you never know what's going to happen tomorrow
It's a good thing to be single and childless. Life is so stressful nowadays. Why bring children into this world when they will probably suffer more than us?
I tell people "I spend 7 hours a day 5 days a week raising other people's children for so little that I'm still qualifying for food stamps. what makes you think I want to come home and take care of children when I can't even afford most of my needs"
I'm not Chinese, I live in the UK. I've never wanted children. I'm not against marriage but it isn't anything I pursued. I don't regret it either. I'd rather just be happy myself. Not making a fuss or problem for others and be free to make my own choices.
The video didn't talk about the demographics of China either. There are more men than women which naturally lead to more options for women which lead to greater expectations. The minimum expectation is house but China practice very chaotically regulated private housing market and now China has crisis in that sector which lead to many people not getting a house after paying for it.
Usually in industralized nations, the poor can't really afford them and have even less time and energy with their several jobs, while the rich at times are rather enjoying their wealth based freedoms without getting bogged down.
It is too stressful to bring a child into this world without having time to be with your child. Marriage is not a guarantee for happiness either. Good development countries provide free education and health care for every child . Many countries in Europe subsidize food and money voucher to support families with children until 18 years old. That would help the families.
Live life in quality not quantity. Me n husband took years to prepare ourselves financially and mentally and for actually enjoying ourselves to the fullest. The FREEDOM before having kids is priceless. From binge watching movies, playing games passed midnights and long couple vacations are all but a distant memories now. Once u hv kids, u cant even stay awake pass 10pm n dont talk abt vacations when all the holidays will be crowded n pack with other families with the same holiday schedules.
This does not last forever but at the time it seems that way. I would say that job no. 1 is to stay healthy long enough to be able to enjoy your retirement years and make it clear to your kids that you will NOT be around to mind their kids in any long term way. I am luck to be blessed with 2 daughters who never forget to say thanks for anything I do. I make it clear to them I do it for enjoyment of their company not out of any sense of obligation.
In a nutshell, it's the culture mixed with the restrictions of their social policy along with the high costs of living that is slowly bringing the demise of birth rates. Personally I don't think that it's just happening in China, as people around the world are faced with higher costs of living, the choice of having kids is a challenge. People have dreams and if settling down with a family isn't in the list, then it's more likely it becomes optional.
The part thats missing here, is that there are very few men that earn the kind of money she's looking for. And at 37, the men who earn that kind of money are looking for someone 10-15 yrs younger than her.
She's needs to lower her standards. Men who earn what she's looking for can marry someone younger who is more likely to birth them children. It's just the reality of the situation. Edit: To clarify, she needs to lower her standards if she wants to find someone, but this doesn't mean having no standards, e.g., maybe someone less wealthy but has decent traits in other areas. It's far better for an educated woman wealthy to be single than for an uneducated, impoverished man who may pressure them to be the caretaker for their parents.
@bird To clarify I mean lower her standards but not having no standards, e.g., maybe he's not as wealthy but still has a stable job and is kind. I am in no way supportive of the "bare branches." They deserve the outcome they're getting for killing their girls. It makes me furious they kidnap and violate girls from my country and the government won't let them return home without giving up their children who are Chinese nationals.
Sorry you are wrong and very wrong. Now is not decreasing population problem but Now is too many old people and too few young people so the world is going to fail very soon.
@@limlisa Glad to hear that because billions of people means more energy, food, water and other resources are required, which will make climate change worse
It's difficult in any East Asian societies. It's the same in Chinese populations in Indonesia, Malaysia, Singapore, Thailand, as well as Taiwan, S.Korea and Japan. So... It will be an uphill battle for China. It's an uphill battle for any Confucius societies.
what's difficult? children born in these countries dont have the burden of being single pressured by multiple generations to do well in school, earn good money, and have a son by the age of 30. they do, but this is usually spread among other siblings.
I've been seeing lots of video talking about this topic to the point I wish people will stop talking about it simply bcs the decision came from reasons. We all knew the reasons. If you want people to change, you have to change the environment first, and that's what should be fixed first.
At 16:18 it's not fair to compare the two, as the pet shop owners are probably local - thus gets more help from the government, the other one with a family are MIGRANTS as she said herself. (you are recorded on your place of birth and you can only get help from your own province) and since they moved they are in an uphill battle to provide ( thus no public schools - they are not technically in the system for that) for their children, I commend them for their fight everyda for a better life. A lot of these parents would leave their children in the countryside because of this.
Yoooooooo our government studied at big university but can’t understand why young couples nowadays don’t have children or just 1??? Reasons are, cost of living, working hours, bills & bills. These are two main reason. If government can’t figure out the reason, then why are they still playing government 😂😂
I feel the govt was not completely honest with their ppl. Our adult kids in LA don’t want to have children bc they are saying how can they afford them when housing is ridiculous. I told them to leave but they love their jobs in La. I feel bad for that family with the 4 children.
To have this kind of subject in china covered by singaporean, S korean, or japanese media is a bit strange, since all 4 countries have similar problem, but with less govt intervention and some have better immigration program for foreign workers to fill in the workforce needs 😂 Education level together with economic expectation work wonderfully as birth control
Iris Chen wants 1. A guy's salary higher than her 2. Got to have a house and a car in Shanghai. 3. The guy's height has to be 5 feet 9 inches(1.75 meters) and above or she will pass. 4. The guy has to be compassionate and emotional stable. 5. The guy's face has to be above average.
And the guy who got all that are the one who will want a women that is: 1. Young & Beautiful (20-25) 2. Feminine & Submissive All so that they have legacies. Successful man have no need to have a successful women as a wife. None of it is her. She is delusional. Why she thinks the top 1% man would want her is mind boggling
i use to live in BJ and worked in the teaching circuit and lawd......their schedule from the time of children to adulthood is STRENUOUS to say the least. a number of them just move out of routine and don't really navigate in a way for themselves, but rather what's best for the collective (which isn't necessarily bad, but knowing when to switch that off is important). the environment doesn't and hasn't cultivated that desire to have families.
The one child policy has virtually eliminated brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews. A bit hard to get your head around as a westerner. The cost of living crisis is worldwide at the moment and the cost of housing is out of control. One question I wonder about, in China, because of the one child policy, is there a disparity in the male/female ratios for that age group. A lack of suitably aged partners must add to the difficulties.
You're darn right there's a disparity between the genders in China. The parents generally see males as valued much more highly than females. A male carries on the family name and is also much more likely to get a higher paying job. So if you're only having one kid most Chinamen prefer a male.
Of course there's a disparity. Women are immensely valuable yet are not valued. A lot of female babies just went "missing". Guess what happened to them. Now there's a lack of women and they're drowning in the filth they created.
Yes there is. They were aborting firls babies, adopting them out ti westerners then the boys had no females to pick from so they went ot the Phillipines and Maylasia. From what I see those marriages don't end well. Cultural differences. China put a stop to adoption from westerners.
With the rise of living and sameness in wages its hard to convince people to want to have kids when it's hard to provide liviing. We do not just want to have families we want to also enjoy the hard work and money (that means to spend on ourselves through pampering etc). thats just my pov. it may sound selfish but I want to travel the world and buy expensive things and enjoy luxury meals once in awhile rather than to invest it in a kid.
Yes you are selfish, at least you've admitted that. Your grandparents lived in the toughest of times and yet they've raised children. You are here, because they didn't have the same mindset as you do.
@@reconnaisance thats because they were not as educated or living in the modern age. Different generations different worries and priorities. Would expect u to have 10+ kids to show your selflessness :)
@@reconnaisance Some had kids so those kids could suffer to provide them with economic security later on in life. That is the same selfish reason some people have many children in the Philippine slums, other than ignorance of how human reproduction works. They are essentially living lottery tickets for some.
@@reconnaisance grandparents of that time have lots of children to help them farming. Children were resources in those days, but in today's world children are burdens
you can only get help/assistance from where you are born - think she may be from the countryside,( as many factory workers are) so in a way she is not the the 'government roster' for social assistance such as public schools, health care etc). it is a tough life. not really fair to be compared to he probably local pet shop owners
To live in a tier 1 city like Shanghai you must be a resident. Migrants can never get residency status. This means officially migrants don't exist. She and her kids can't access public hospitals, public schools, etc. In the place she was born she can access public hospitals and public schools. However public school quality in poor provinces sucks. All students in China take national level exams (gao cow) for university entrance. A single high stakes exam. Students get a national ranking. That ranking determines where/if you can go to university. Many students suicide if their ranking is low. China is a dog eat dog world. Here's another example. Let's say you are driving a car and you accidentally hit a person on an electric scooter. Paying a death burial is cheaper than paying the victim's medical bill. So, what do they do? Yes, the car driver will repeatedly rev forward and backwards running over the victim until they die. Here's another example, let's say some elderly person falls down in a public place. No one will help them. Why? Because there are no good Samaritan laws. If you help, you then can be held responsible for the elderly person's medical bills, an allowance to pay their housing while they recover, etc. It is an unbelievably cruel place.
population reduction is absolutely essential in the 21st century for civilisation to continue in the 22nd century. Japan is leading the way, but China and the Western world are all on board. Now we've got to get the rest to slow down. To all Chinese people working less in order to be more creative, play more sports, look after family, do more volunteering in the community etc, I applaud you.
the economy works by having the young working to support the old, but 1 child policy made it so that there's no young to generate the economy to support the age care
its getting ridiculous everywhere rise of living and we are too crowed. there is no need to have children when you can't even afford to take care yourself..
I had a hair and makeup client from China the other day. The reasons she gave were ones a lot of us in the West also feel … the powers that be just want more slaves but there is little to no practical help.
xiaoyan has to change her outlook in life. the sons don't have to get married you know. she should be satisfied as long as they are independent and happy.
When you spend your entire childhood trying to get the best grades or get beaten up, then to work 12 hours a day 6 days a week getting paid barely enough to afford housing. Alot of people would probably choose to spend whatever free time they have left to themselves. Or not have any time to build a relationship at all.
Exactly. They wanna use the time to unwind, worry about themselves, have fun. Not to mention they might take what they dealt with and realize that putting their kid through that is not what they want. That and you gotta factor in the high expectations in the dating market.
Relationship, maybe. Child, hell no! No one wants one’s child to go through everything one has suffered.
@@Aleph-alpha yep, they think its because its because of the price, but its not, we dont want our child go through everything we has suffered
@@Aleph-alpha
😢👌👏👍
@@socrates1796
😢👌👏👍
I don't think it is just China. From observing videos of young adults in a variety of countries I see a trend of not wanting to bring children into a world with a future that seems more and more uncertain, and I certainly cannot blame them.
Yep. The problem is people cannot afford children.
Not just uncertain, but so expensive. People can barely pay for themselves even living with a partner and splitting costs.
Yes I agree
It’s mostly because I can’t even afford to live on my own with the high cost of living, so getting married and having kids is just not possible for me.
Yeah, it's sad, cause, I'm surely not the only one, but I really want kids. But I'm scared to have kids in a world that simply won't be suitable for even just one innocent life to thrive happily in. I know that certain countries can be better than others though, and so if I can atleast move to the UK, (I'm American, born 2001) then maybe there's a better chance in the social climate. But even then, there's so much left to be improved, for a person to CHOOSE to have kids with the view of someone in my demographic.
*Edit*
If thinking money based, economy, etc. Then, yes the U.S may be better in my case. But *personally* that makes up the half of a good environment. The happiness and safety, and such that I want, includes a places societal values, morals, if they treat people that are different or hell, exactly the same as them but have one opinion different to theirs. Wealth and stability in the monetary sense is what will surely set up a good foundation for a family, but if the world outside the little bubble of my nice home in the suburbs, is a minefield, then, I'm basically just as hesitant. I've found the couple of replies very informative and (surprisingly for a yt comment) an actually pleasant mini conversation. I appreciate your common courtesy. If the every day, small arguments and large issues were debated and spoken about in the same manner we have, I'd be happy almost anywhere. ✌️
My young fried just said "Have babies for what? So my babies become the next working force of the nation? Basicly the next slaves to make few billionares to be richer while my kids life are miserable? "
"No I won't have kids just because society needs new slaves."
I do not blame her this is not a good enviroment. My respect to her , I do admire the courage to stand up and live her life the way she think is the best for her.
Thank you sooo much for understanding. A lot of people are blaming women and feminism as the sole reason for this
@@bluegrays9872 Lmao, it doesn't matter what it is. The issue could be that a species of flower is disappearing from the world and women and feminism would still be blamed for it. You'll always be a scapegoat as a woman so you might as well do whatever you want. The last thing this planet needs is more people. Not to mention that society doesn't need unwanted children who suffer with parents who had them because of social pressure and now resent them. Enough with sad, apathetic mothers and useless, absent fathers. If you have a kid or kids that better be your fcking DREAM. If it's not, forget it. Don't torture yourself and others.
@@bluegrays9872 and it's true, many women simply don't want to have children. They are finally free from being baby factories for men who want a fanily
So not having children is a backlash agains the elites? Isn't that also the point and purpose of those same elites? To reduce the population of the plebeians? It seems it's the elites who are influencing these decisions either way.
well down the road when she 50, shes probably gonna be lonely .. and depressed.
Money wont fill the emptiness hole.
I'm Asian American. My family did everything they could to provide for me and made so many sacrifices for me to to have a brighter future and I am forever grateful and in awe of them. However, I still grew up very poor and I grew up with the absence of any real adult in my childhood due to them working extensively to survive. Even though my family sacrificed everything for me to not worry about money, I was acutely aware of my family's financial situation and it became a stress and obsession to be financially stable. I now have a comfortable job and future, but at the cost of a carefree childhood and the absence of parental presence. I would never want kids unless I can afford the time and money to nurture them.
I don't know,, but I just want to comment. I just want to tell you, Jesus loves you. He is close to the broken hearted. I mean well. Please understand. Jesus is the only faithful pure love one can know. A prayer to him on your behalf. God bless you abundantly with peace, love and joy.
The obsession with profits at all costs is destroying the basic family structure. Government-trained strangers raise our children in America because both parents are required to work in order to maintain a basic standard of living. Long-term Mothering is looked down upon. Capitalism has labeled us all worthless in one way or another unless we subjugate ourselves to the whims of the elite.
I feel the same. Sometimes I am so hard on myself so my parents don’t get disappointed. I know they love me but the way of loving me was not really what I needed it when I was a kid. Good luck!❤️
@@lisak1895 I agree... Jesus is there for everyone.. Every single child who dies of starvation or is in pain because they can't afford medicine.. Jesus is always there. When people lose their homes and have no place to go.. They can always go to the church who will provide food and accommodation for everyone.. Don't worry about money.. Just make babies.. Because Jesus is there for everyone.. Including the children who die in war... Money is of this world... Even if you have suffered here your entire life it doesn't matter.. There's an eternal life that awaits.
@@lisak1895 yucky. You had to bring fakeness into the conversation
The first two minutes made me laugh out loud. We're watching a country designed from the ground up to discourage people from marrying and they all like, "why won't people get married?"
The emotional disconnect is real. And it's spreading all over the world.
Thats insane i agree the whole set up makes marriage and children unappealing yet they see the problem sort of mostly economically and now want ppl to have kids without making it easier or cost effective! Good luck with that!
Yea exactly asian parents no dating until after university and when child graduated university parents why you not married yet?
You really can't have even have a life when you work 9am to 9pm 6 days a week. If you do have any kids or spouse they won't know you.
What an ignorant comment. 🙄Another "negative" statement to make another country look bad.
This is a global trend, not just happening particularly in China. There are a lot of contributing factors why people now a days are less likely to get married and/or have a family - social, financial, logistical, etc...
The hell with society. A child should be brought into this world because the parent(s) wanted to raise a person with love and provide them with the resources to have the best shot at a fulfilling life. If you want someone to help take care of you when you're old, hire a caretaker. People who aren't equipped to raise children end up doing so (at the detriment of the children) due to societal expectations and tradition.
Politicians think about economy, labour force, not love or quality of life.
It’s Way worst in Vietnam.
Well said, Liz.
This.
Some parents should not be born at all . Having kids so when you old . your kids will taking care of you . Wow suck a looser and selfish parents. .
In China it's very difficult to find a job after 35 as there's requirement of age and gender in almost all the job advertisement. They can do that simply because there's too many people. The professor being interviewed in this video has been promoting Population Crisis in the last decade. But China is NOT lack of labour. They can refuse people over 35 to apply for a job because they can still receive hundreds/thousands of application from under-35s- for one position. They want more babies because they want cheap labours in the next generation. Women are most likely to be blamed when there is less and less babies born each year. However China has a very high rate of marriage among females and more than 99% of women get married at least once in their life and most of them have at least one child. Because of sex selective abortion since 90s, there are 20 millions gap between male and female population between age 20-50. Less women means less mums and less uterus means less babies. Chinese culture prefers boys but unfortunately due to the obvious biological reason boys can't produce next generation without a wife. Lack of babies is Karma of murdering unborn/born girls.
Just like the great leap forward, but Winnie the Poo doesn't want you to know your country's history. Just like Justin Turdo wants for us as well.
@@Albapurified I'm not sure what you are talking about. But if you are talking about one child policy, it never involved jail. And some people choose to kill the baby girl at 3-4 months pregnancy when they find out the sex. To make sure the only child will be a boy, they keeps killing until it's a boy and then he could be born. Some women get abortion for 2-6 times in order to have a boy. So it's the "first" child they kill, not the second one. And even now a lot of Chinese families who live out of China are still do the same. There's no one child policy in Australia, but the sex ratio of new born is as same as in China. One child policy has been removed for a decade, but the new born sex ratio is not getting better, instead, it's getting worse. Sex ratio has always been a problem in China and it's not about the current government. China is a only country that be involved into WW2 still had more men than women after the wars. Looking at official records, at anytime of the history, there was always more men than women and sometimes in a city men can be double of the women.
35 is young ! 😮
Still with many years to live and work it ridiculous!!
My friends/penpals who live in Japan, China, and South Korea moved from the cities to the countryside. It really did wonders for their health. They are’t paying for an outrageously overpriced house or apartment, no back breaking, mind numbing, pressure cooker, rat race of a career, no kids to take care of, not having to worry about being on time. They love it. It feels like an “Animal Crossing” lifestyle.
I was thinking this. If they have internet access, they can make it happen.
Very true. People used to work to provide for their family but now people find family a hinderance to continue work. Most people don't even know what they are working for. Soon we will have another world war where we will realize that material wealth would mean nothing if you don't have people to support you. This cycle will repeat again and again. Guess this is the curse of humanity.
@@mr.uthamaputhiran9790 When most basic needs are met but anything beyond that is years long trek of saving and investing money only to expirience recession and inflation every 20 years or so. That money you saved is at least worth half of what it used to be in those 20 years yet you need to save 20-40 years for a house and in those 20-40 years so many things can happen that would render your hardships as useless and pointless. That many people give up before trying to save money for 20-40 years to come that will essentially make them a slave without chains for best half of their lives. Nobody wants to be a slave.
For the longest time I have been thinking about doing this.
How are they making a living?
Its so amazing that we finally get to see the effect of the previous generation's parenting and political policies.
They ruined everything and now act all surprised about it
Eventually what's going to happen is the state assigning man and woman pairings, then force them to "Mate" under supervision, then force them to produce children until the female's body fails.
@@1mol831 this is usually the end game but they will get randoms off the street first and kidnap them
@@mandolen3317 How? The one child policy was implemented before China experienced the economic miracle. The government wanted to reduce and end poverty while gradually introducing prosperity. It is called a rock and a hard place. I think they did the right thing.
@@yaggaman1914 Not really. Korean women from DPRK are despearte to escape fat kim regime and China new prosperity is too tempting. Even Russians , laos, filipinos are increasingly found in China major cities. What the government might do is relax marriages of women born abroad.
It’s not about falling in love. It’s an economic decision.
I fully agree with this.
Over half of the money I make after taxes from a full-time job would get eaten up by the average rent for a one-bedroom apartment in my area.
It’s quite impossible for me to afford being able to fall in love and have a family…
@@The4Tifier try van life. It rocks.
@@segurosincero4057 Van life is fine when you're single or even a couple. Now imagine van life with children. Not so much.
@@KabobHope This is true. Van life is challenging enough for adults.
@@KabobHope Yes. But also, it's not really fine. Most people very understandably do not want to live in a van. I know you're not the one who made the suggestion I'm just saying I hate it when that's someone's response to a person saying they can't afford normal basic living. Imagine if someone told our parents or grandpatents to just live out of a vehicle.
"What I pursue in life is my own creative freedom" . . . that says it all. No matter how rigid previous era cultural rules may have been, this is a different era. You can't force someone to "fall in love" with a preselected mate who mechanically fits the expected checked boxes on a clipboard, these times are different. People do want to fall in love, but in their own ways, with someone they actually are in love with, and actually have a real marriage, not just a quasi arranged one. For some, maybe not getting married at all is what works for them. Also, the crushing cost of raising a family is very different than in previous times, it's not for everyone. Welcome to the 21st century . . .
That rhetoric leads to a situation where there aren't enough kids to replace. Reproduction is not a 'choice' but a biological responsibility.
@@sriharshacv7760 It is a choice, and one that a lot of people make out of their own volition. We won't run out of humans any time soon.
@@sriharshacv7760 maybe, but you old people that made it extremely impossible for the younger generation
@@peacechan4500 in usa i found good documentary about how baby boomers sold their kids futures and i think my generation when we get old we are f!
Welcome to the results of 40 years of conservative ideology, stealing from the working and middle classes to enrich the 1%.
They say population decline is a problem, yet at the same time, the population is too huge and there are not enough jobs for everyone. They want to keep the labor cheap and disposable, which is why they need the unemployment rate to be high. They encourage fierce competition in the lower classes for the scarce amount of jobs, while the ruling classes enjoy the luxury of little to no competition, and a monopolistic life.
The high unemployment rate is hence not a problem for them but a design of the system.
Exactly, kids of the poor=slaves of the rich!
We need less people the issue is cheap labour feeding the rich and looking after old people
Sperm count been going down for years a natural response to over population. Plenty of people have kids
@@emilyb5278 how do testicles know to produce less sperm? do they have access to government demographic data?
@@Guillhez PFft true your comment just made me laugh
I do not think it is only in China. I see that more young adults are choosing freedom and life experiences over marriage and having families. As society life becomes more expensive and more dangerous. We will see more people choosing to be child free.
You can have freedom and life experiences first and marry later if you wish. Also not everyone is equipped to have children. In the U.S. they marry later, so they can have an education, career, a house.
It's only Caucasian and Asians who are having major problems with plummeting fertility rates.
You are so right. I told my granddaughter that young adults now are happy to call their dogs and cats their children. If they do decide to have babies, it is usually one. Times are changing and Its their lives.
@@deamorebeaute2412 If you want to talk major problems then point your attention at people breeding like rabbits in their impoverished countries.
Essentially we simply aren't sure of our relationships to last economic instability and for our other half not to abandon ship when they feel that it sinks. Even if they are to blame for that instability. Add to this economic instability and unhealthy work environment of 10-12 h a day six days a week just to live. Add to it no social security or barely any for new families with kids. Like barely any free care for them. When I feel that there is barely any possibility to have children in my country. And I have seen just a tip of what it is like in China. My country is at least 2 times better in this regard to rising children and living expenses.
5:05 "I feel sad...She (mom) doesn't care what kind of person I am, whether I am a good person, what I like and what my dream is. The most important thing for her is to have a son who earns a lot of money so he can marry a wife." Mom feels greatly humiliated compared to other people, because son has no wife or kids. Such superficial pride in materialism.
I do not have children. I struggled financially as a child and I do not think it is fair to do that to another innocent person. The world feels out of control and unsafe, so that is a sentiment that many people I know share. #Childfree
I understand
People do not understand that. It drives me mad when losers like black American men curse women who do not want to get married, saying they will die alone. Not everybody has been fortunate enough to have a background conducive to marriage and babies. I am glad I am not the only one feeling the way you have stated so thank you.
Same here
I agree 100%. I also grew up in a financially unstable home. The world is in a state of chaos and everything is getting more expensive. I don't think it's wise to have children in this environment.
Yes so true i couldn't be so cruel to bring someone to this weird mix.... Child free 💙
CCP to citizenry:- 'you can have more babies now'.
Citizenry:- 'no thanks'.
👏😆
It's more like:
Citizenry: Are you completely out of your f#$*ing mind?
They will be forced to have children soon
😃😃
that day you realise the government encourages you to f# off. I always thought that was quintessentially British
@@vickyk8014 nope the limited resources of the planet is reserved for the Elites & their kids. Its a well planned move not just in china, AI gonna take over most jobs so a lot of "locusts" as they call us, gotta go
I'm a Chinese national who left China when I was 6 with my parents and we never looked back. I'm now happily married with my husband with a son. So glad my parents made the decision to leave China in 1998. We are not wealthy when we left but they worked so hard abroad and I was able to get my masters degree. It's really sad watching this because this could have been me.
Thanks for sharing
It's sad becuase it could have been you
You only care when it affects you and not others
呵呵哒
Very similar to me, but I left in 2008 and I'm now 21
Where do you live now?
5:06 Yes, for a lot of Asian parents, your job and your marriage are important. Other stuff don't matter. From experience, mine does not care about my wellbeing, just how much "face" I brought to the family, how much "humiliation" I would bring if I do something that is no-no, and how much I earn.
Hugs. I am familiar with this sort of environment. I wish you the best. Sorry to hear that.
Good to move out and distance yourself from a toxic environment, even if it's your family.
This is true across many Asian cultures including both East and South Asia. Parents don't give 2 shites about their kids health or happiness. It's all about reputation and status so they can brag, effectively reducing the child to a trophy.
I had similar situations but managed to get a job and moved far away and only see my family sometime. I spent my savings and free time exploring the world. No childcare, no mortgage, the world is my home because I don't have a firm roots
Cuz we don't have social security here so your income & ur children when u retire, are your social security! It's just sad
For the same reason many other nation's populations aren't having children. Corporations have drained all of the resources from the middle class. They don't have the time or funds to raise a family.
Corporations AND governments.
I feel so light after reading many of these comments of like minded ppl. I m married for 10 years and do not have children. When my mom tells me they were 6 siblings n my grandpa couldn’t pay for her school but I should b happy because she paid for mine, I said grandpa is not a good father nd I was barely 10-12 then. I was scolded. Even now ppl lecture me to have a child otherwise who will take care of me n I say they r not retirement plan. Thank god I m not the only one.
I so have heard these things from Indian aunties and people not that much older than me. Like having kids will guarantee that u have someone taking care of u in old age. And it is such a selfish reason to have kids.
@@kanikagaral7637 But familial motivations aside, isn't it kinda true though?
Many nations are struggling with pensions and the retirement age because the nation does not have enough children to take care of its elderly.
When you get old, you slowly lose your strength and capacity to act on your own. How will we survive then?
Trough welfare?
But welfare is just the children of the nation. No children, no welfare, and the retirement age gets pushed furter and further ahead.
There is no escape. Unless a way is discovered to remain strong in old age, we will always need young people.
Saying they are just a strain on our current ressources is being narrow-sighted.
@@TheUrizen so how is it anybody responsibility to take car eof us when we get old?? Dude that's just weird.
@@TheUrizenstop it. Do you know how high demand the market will be for elderly folk paying total strangers to care for them??!! Pricing will be brutal and many wont have kids to care for them. So they will create a whole new demand in the workplace
@@kanikagaral7637 For the same reason we are supposed to care for children and the disabled: because they can't do it for themselves.
If we are not in any obligation to care for the elderly, then you might as well cancel the pension fund and let nature get rid of the old geezers.
People don't realize a lot of kids in China stay at school in the dorms and study from morning until literal night from Monday till Saturday, then they get 1 day at home. Their schools are more on rote repetition-based learning and about getting the highest grades instead of focusing on learning. Then after that you're supposed to go to university to slave away again for a degree, then after their degree they find that they struggle to find jobs and if they get them it's barely enough to make ends meet while being told 996 (9am-9pm, 6 days a week) is the ideal standard of life. Not only did the housing developers and banks screw them over (I hope you saw what happened with the scandals lately; I'm referring to those), then their government fucks them over on so many things while stomping on their voices. Slaving away from childhood in the schools to avoid being beaten up, to barely making it in the workforce, to those who throw in the towel, would you blame them?
996 as an objective standard is disgusting. You are literally no different from a slave with that sort of mentality (especially if you are not actually pursuing something that you are passionate about). China Chinese are oppressed, but a lot of them are not stupid. Those who are not brainwashed run to other countries, and CCP China is panicking because people literally can't afford children either financially or mentally, and people are LEAVING. With the advent of the internet and opening of borders, they can censor whatever they want, but it is inevitable this would happen.
EDIT: University in China is cheaper.
Unfortunately only the rich and extremely high skilled worker can leave… Everyone wants their child to earn lots but the country need tons of low level workers. All this while businesses kept paying dirt to said workers.
The majority of universities in China are very cheap. Not like the ones in the UK or USA.
Speaking like a true ignoramus. You have no idea about China's education system do you? Rote learning was never a thing, it was something created by American to explain why Asians get better grades
I'm Chinese and you talk like a fool
There are very few students in boarding schools.
China has school districts. During compulsory education, you will be assigned to a nearby school and you can walk to and from school.
You should have children because you want but not because someone else wants to or by society!
Even if you want doesn't mean you can if you don't have the means to provide with the increasing financial pressure
@@irone7050 I want to live like a billionaire but my wants aren't feasible. A baby is a second mortgage in many countries (and China is no exception), 20 years ago it was still possible to raise a child in semi poverty, nowadays it's impossible.
And the reason u want is that u wan to give love to another. Not just to tick off your to do list or societal pressure
👍👏👌
media keeps preaching about it, government, businessmen and those in power because they worry about their bottom line and having to think of a solution. if billionaires needs 1000 workers to run a factory at poor pay and inhumane shift, they should make their own babies since they can. we really should focus on our own lives and happiness and not what media and so called "greater" good for a sacrifice that's too unfair for us.
When China was poor, parents needed kids to help with the farm or the store. Now that China is no longer poor, people want to enjoy life. Kids are expensive and take time of what precious little time and money the working class has left outside of work.
Population sizes shrinking due to low birthrates is the most humane way to solve Earth's human overpopulation issues. It'll cause economic upheaval for sure, but I genuinely think that the end result with be positive. A lower population means that companies will no longer be able to get away scott-free with treating human beings as disposable livestock.
it only drives them to introduce cheaper lambs acquired from afar
Pay attention to your human geography class!
I agree with your insights.
Naw. Humans will just be replaced by A.I. or other computerized/technology.
Daydreamer: Don't kid yourself. Companies will HERD the remaining population and you WILL be livestock (their captive consumers). Logic seems to be absent in your calculations.
Thankfully, my mom has always discouraged me from having children. She never wanted children, she was pressured into it by people around her.
She says when she saw me have a hard time at school when I was 10, I asked her if I could be un-birthed. She wished she had never succumbed to that pressure.
I have witnessed my mom's life through financial instability, through motherhood, through being yelled at but having to keep her head down for her children. I will never repeat that for her peace of mind.
I am sorry that you suffered and I hope you are okay now. So that not to regret later, please think what is your desire irrespective of your mother's feelings. Maybe you would feel happy having children. Sending hugs 🤗
@@teodoramb7503 That person gave a thoughtful response. They seem sure of what they want and why. You don't need to tell them they might regret it and children might make them happy. You're not talking to an idiot.
Do it for you, not for your mom.
@@teodoramb7503 thankyou for giving an unselfish advise....true that person might regret later for not having a child....
Sounds like your mom is doing to you what people around her did to her. Ultimately, it is your choice to have children or not. Your mom's trauma doesn't need to be your burden but I don't know you or your mom so, all the best
Education changes everything. Chinese youth these days are highly educated so they no longer view marriage as a necessity. This is no difference than what happened in other advanced economies.
china is not an advance society LOL
True and I heard story of raising a child in China now cost 3 times compared to other nations.
I also heard story of a guy who lost his fiancée and abortion carried out by her parent all because the apartment he bought will never finish. Now he lost everything.
@@romeoalfa7187Yes it was real. This documentary here th-cam.com/video/jNRtOEujfQc/w-d-xo.html&ab_channel=CNAInsider
@@romeoalfa7187 Yes, he is referring to the lan wei (烂尾 ) building video, can search for it under CNA insider "The Great Fall Of China's Housing Market".
I like it, educate all whites and Chinese not to get married
5:20 Imagine your mom feeling "humiliated" because you choose how to live your own life, the nonsense is real.
Marriage and children are a burden and young people know it, this is why they stay childfree.
When you have parents pushing you to marry for all the wrong reasons, it can't end well.
It is true. My parents sleep emotionally blackmailing me too to ger marred but here's the kicker the more they ask me to ilthe more I hate the idea.
@@kanikagaral7637 stay strong king.
A person lives only once. Live how you want to, have a kid or don't.. Remember you're not obliged to societal constraints because it's not their lifestyle you're forced to live but your own.
All over the world, ppl didn't want children for a lot of reasons. But in China, there are a thousand reason why ppl don't want kids. First, they lived through stressful environment where childrens are competing since they're so young. I'm sure they don't want their kids to live through that.
Marriage and child sometimes equal burden and hardship.
It really becomes a burden to most women. I don't know many married women who are truly happy and free to do whatever they want, even something simple as rest. No one takes care of you but you are expected to take care of others for the rest of your life. No thanks.
China needs less people not more people.
Did Confucius say that
You have to live in the right country for it to work.
@@minahm4069 as a woman, this is literally why i avoid marriage or having children... I have my own life to live, and I just want to chill and enjoy myself, thanks :) if government wants kids, they can set up free caregiving facilities and that'll help lessen burden on society
Well if society itself was not this damaged and sick, maybe people would have more relations and kids.
hard to hear, but true
Amen!
Hell I work full time and do gig work on the side but still make so little I qualify for food stamps and Medicaid.
Chinese parenting: Don’t care if your child is happy or not, whether he is a good person with value or not, the only important thing is to earn more money and start a family, don’t care if the couples like each other or not lmao
So true. They just wan their son to bring in a daughter in law to do all the chores and serve them then make some grandsons so they can boast about how happy and successful their family is to their frens and relatives.
@@l_ifeefi_l1998 to be fair though, Chinese parents will help look after your grandchildren so you save loads of money on hiring babysitters. Plus they also cook you food all the time if you live nearby or visit.
Exactly, Chinese culture hasn't move forward or elvole to adopt for the modern life style.
@@drewh3224 Which country are you from??
@@drewh3224 Unfortunately, this culture is prevalent in Chinese diaspora and even throughout Asia, hardly limited to Mainland China
I am glad this guy has decided to do his own thing and not follow the demands of society or his culture, he is definitely thinking about his happiness and mental health first.
I have 2 kids and I kept telling them please no grandkids for me thanks. Just go do whatever they like and be happy even if they want to lay flat. Life is too short to worry too much.
I agree!
Marriage is no guarantee of happiness. People should do whatever makes them happy rather than sacrificing their happiness to their parents, companies, government and society. I feel terribly sorry for the woman who has to worry about her two sons now and in the future. This, to me, is not living; I would rather be dead than be in her unfortunate situation. I feel the couples who adopt pets are the wisest and mentally healthiest, and they seem genuinely joyful with their decision not to want children. They will likely live a better life than the depressed and anxious woman with three sons (including her husband).
Which country are you from??
Family is great source of happiness, as you have companions of all ages to fulfil your life and share your success and support you in failures. It works for most of the world.
Considering 50% of marriage in China ended up in divorce and some even said once they have a child, they already fulfilled their obligation to carry on the family name.
Yes, lots of marriage is not of love, but pressures from families, relatives and more.
l agree:marriage is an option,not a goal or a prize; but the issue is:what would happen if every Chinese adult chose pets instead of children?I wonder ...and yes,the mother's husband is a childish moron
@@keerthisureshseelam not really a source of happiness if the said family can't afford to eat three healthy meals a day or send all the offspring to school without each parent working two jobs.
Life is too hard to bring children into it.
I came to the US from China when I was 20 alone. Spent years years to get a degree while having a part time job and then get a good job. Tried to fit in here. No time to date anyone in my 20s. Now I am an independent single 34 female and it’s so hard for me to settle for less putting more things on my shoulders.
Absolute legend. Not many people have the courage or even think about leaving their country alone and start a new life there. Have a great day!
There are homeless people, try to talk o them.
Yikes, its other women who took advantage of men who ruined the simple life for simple ladies. Amber Heard being the spitting image of that. Now men like me are cautious of what the opposite sex might do to us. Oh well.
@@phoenixrising4995 Nah you're a loser incel. Women don't even care about you in the first place lol
Radical idea: focus on your own well-being. Stop living your life to impress or satisfy the demands of other people. I promise, you will find joy.
Putting all the eggs in one basket is never a good idea, even if it is your own children. There is also no guarantee that your children will be successful. Everyone is unique and are born with different gifts, and if your child is not suited to these factory farming education systems then you're literally tossing your money down the drain.
Also putting that much burden on the shoulders of young children is unfair. It will have very serious consequences and they may even grow up to hate their own parents. I've seen too many relatives and friends brought up in these kinds of situations and they don't even say hi to their parents on the phone now.
We are not here to only procreate have children, we are here to experience Life.
Marriage and children doesn’t equal happiness.
@BlackBannerz It's the truth, not even God forces us to marriage. Real happiness comes from Christ and from knowing who you are. If you are not happy by yourself, what makes you think that being with someone else will fix that? Especially when women carry the burden of taking care of others and less of themselves. Or the spouse that has to work most of the day, almost every day just to eat, pay the bills and feed the children. That's not a life. Just because many of us came from that, doesn't mean it's a real life. Everyone should have good financial conditions, mental health and stability, to carry out the huuuge responsibility that is marriage and children. It's not something you should do due to peer pressure. Especially by people who will not help you carry that responsibility.
@@kenasssss
Does Christ pay your monthly rent?🤣😂
@@oneviwatara9384 Yes, He does. 😎 He does not fail whoever put their trust in Him. 😘
What’s important now is the population decline, not happiness.
@@rbt-0007 people aren't dogs to be bred. Treating them like dogs is how the situation got this bad in the first place.
Housing prices are great birth control.
Why should they? To benefit a society that doesn't reward them with anything but promises of 'one day you'll be rewarded'? Which applies to everyone in the world!
With a 1 Child Policy, you guaranteed a generation or so of Chinese will not have partners. The last generations' parents couldn't replace themselves. If you DO have a daughter, she may be pressured to achieve whatever a son would have, or provide whatever old-age security they would have anticipated from a son among many other things. Very often, so called "top-shelf people", as is suggested, tend to emigrate, further depleting the marriage-able market. I have seen the week end dating markets where parents also shop for possible mates, which makes me so sad.
Every government in the world needs to organize workplace childcare, Flexi hours or jobshares for women, work from home and study from home for young mothers and young children. Without these measures, no intelligent women will have children.
Not to mention no truly intelligent women will have children without true equality where the father shares the same burden because the mother is NOT the only parent. Put your body on the line to have a kid, put your health and your life on the line and then put your livelihood on the line too. No.
Finally someone is mentioning the actual reasons why.
I agree with this, making a living in modern society will not get any easier, so if governments want societies to continue in a healthy way, they need to invest in means for citizens to be productive AND happy, even with familial responsibility. Its definitely true that remote work makes this much easier to achieve, parents can set their work schedule around childcare. But employers have to be flexible and think outside the box for such things to work.
Maybe there should be some flexibility for fathers too, so they can contribute equally to the raising of their child?
@@apopuffkin1717 Countries with generous parental leave (including paternal leave) and subsidized daycare create better flexibility for both parents. It gives both parents time to be with their kids and a safe, social place for their children while the parents work.
It’s help if the chinese government stop passing laws and regulations counter to what people need and want. I’m glad I no longer live in China because everybody have been bamboozled to live life for the sake of someone else, and many can’t handle the reality that life can be more than what they have always known. I hope more Chinese people in China would be like those men and women featured here.
Confirm you have lousy character that forget the person that dig the well. If China have not slowly open up, do u think u can be here? LKY said China will be a great nation in less that 50 year. I trust his vision.
I notice that too. it's always about the greater good. but actually for the good of minority at a sacrifice that's not worth it at the end because nothing of value will be with you and your loved ones after the sacrifices for this subjective greater good.
@@Maya-sv1pz Ccp's mentality is always 'greater good for the state', it ignores the individual's needs and wants. When they ask 'why no children being made', they dont seem to realise its because the average mainlander is expected to serve the state and not disappoint their parents. How the hell do you have a family, much less fall in love when such a thing is expected?
Happy for you, enjoy your life and may you be blessed
This is the world trend not only in China. With rising cost of living and competitive jobs environment better stay childless and be happy.
When the economy is bad people don't have the luxury of marriage for love (that is if they aren't already in love) and usually have to decide their and their possible childrens future based on how much they can afford. This younger generation grew up with impossible expectations placed on them. Anyone who is forced their whole childhood to be perfect will ultimately seek freedom once they're adults over what they were forced to be and do since it wasn't pleasant. I say good on them for standing up for themselves and their freedom. China really dug their own hole by forcing their people to do their whims for so long.
If I was living under such a strict dictatorship I wouldn’t want to have kids either.
And if people are unhappy, sex is not really the resulting activity.
When your every move is watched and monitored, it’s very hard to relax. Plus everyone is too fussy these days.
You would have to be crazy to bring up a child in that environment let alone knowing what's going to happen to them
Outstanding production. Interviews with a broad spectrum of perspectives. The ending was absolutely lovely.
Iris Chen said she want a guy with a higher salary and must be over 1.75cm. If she is able to find that guy don't be surprised if he says he wants a younger women not someone over 37 years older
She wants a guy who would want a 20y.o. she mad deluded
she will meet the wall.
A perfect example of a woman needs to seriously look at herself in front of a mirror or two. She is out of touched, obnoxious, delusional, and perhaps arrogance to no where! She doesn't realize her time is up, and run out of time for her!
Is she for real???.
No wonder the guy is just playing on his phone, when he's supposed to talk with her....😂😂😂
If she wants to get married she needs to find a foreigner. I know single nerdy males from the West who have gone to China and come back with a wife. Their wife has hunted them down. 🤣
It's supply and demand, if the government demands that people have children then it should supply them with a house and income.
No government seems to get that.
And even then, some probably wouldn’t want to do it. Once they achieve a comfortable standard of living, why screw that up by having a baby?
I always thought the one child policy was stupid because of their driven need to keep the family line and mostly the wanted to keep the males and how they adopted out females who did they think their boys would marry and have children with? Many girls left the country in the adoption so how the regime thought this would work?🤷🏻♀️
They were trying to drastically reduce their population growth and it worked and now the downstream effects of that success are becoming clear. The population growth of any group is directly dependent on the number of living females of fertile age. Reduce the number of females and you reduce the size of the population. Farmers have known about this forever. If you're looking at population dynamics (and this is from a purely biological perspective), then the number of males in most mammalian species is only relevant in terms of the amount of resources that those males consume.
@@erinmorash9334 funny you say that I am a farmer and many years ago though by them wanting to keep all males and seem to adopt out the females to other countries mostly who did they think their males would breed with in the future and here we are in the future and as you said the male population is way over the female population. My girlfriend and her hubby adopted a baby girl back 19 years ago from there so I was learning about it from her and there were no males just girls up for adoption when she was waiting. The girl she adopted is absolutely gorgeous inside and out and sadly doesn’t know her exact birthday as she was dumped at an orphanage so they picked a near enough day to how old she looked.
@@sotired7453 well the males will breed with males lol men can have babies
@@kingblade1090 that’s right I forgot in this new world they believe this so my guess is this is the last generation 😂
It's indeed a tough situation but the most amusing thing is , it's the first time I hear parents who have sons cribbing about dowry. It's the opposite case in India where having a daughter is frowned upon and parents end up worrying to death. 😅
Speaking the truth, dowry is the price people pay to supplement the attractiveness of the match. It is mostly a leverage in a negotiation. It totally makes sense. Even in India, parents of beautiful women don't pay anything (or nominal wedding costs). The ugly truth is unattractive people (in case of men, even those without basic social, marketing skills are effectively unattractive) exist on both male and female side. The former find themselves unmarried and the latter's parents bribe a reasonable groom to marry their daughter. It is a messed up situation but just a different negotiating environment compared to Westerners or Chinese. I don't get why our people are so self-loathing.
I think it is because there are "missing" women in the country due to the one child policy and the preference for boys. A lot of female babies just went "missing", so now it is hard to find a bride.
@@ttrev007 Yes, I've heard that the one child policy was implemented in part by forced abortions! Also, that out of 1000 voluntary abortions, 999 would be female, as everyone wanted a boy to carry on the family name ... so, over several decades, there's a huge shortage of women and surprisingly, very few people want to emigrate to China these days ... I wonder why???
@@ttrev007 the very definition of having to lie in the bed they made themselves
I understand it to be a cultural thing.
Have children for the GDP. Be wise, don't be folish.children are expensive, invest in yourself not put your hope in another human. Life is hard
All these problems exist because the government intervened in the property market too late, after house prices had climbed to extremely high level, which are out of reach of many people.
Many got rich and then got greedy. The CCP pumped money in real estate in a move akin to the Japan model of the late 80s. Back then the hypothetical value of the land where the palace in Kyoto lies was more valuable than the entire real estate market of a whole US big city. Just like Japan in the 90s, I predict a series of decades of economic stagnation and birthrate cratering.
Well, the property became what it is because of the government. In China all lands are owned by the government and they have total control of land prices
No government can beat the objective laws of a market economy.
When 1.4 billion people are crowding into Beijing and Shanghai, housing prices cannot be low.
The first man in the video and the woman with the children both make difficult choices as expatriates in Shanghai, just like the first generation of Chinese immigrants in the US who bought their homes by washing dishes for decades.
true. I am 31 years old, turning to 32 soon, and I choose to stay single, in a small city. After 5 years working in the States, and with my parents' help, I was able to purchase a big apartment in my hometown and now I have moved in. My apartment is not far from my parents, I now am living with my two cats, working at a small furniture company with very low pay but enough for me and my cats. I don't desire to go to big cities, with all that hustling and bustling, and zero covid policy, life is too tough and I have tasted the hard life when I was alone in the U.S. working my life into the grave. I don't feel like retiring but my previous experiences have cost too much of my energy. I don't know if I am laying flat or letting myself rot... When my parents grow elderly, I will let them move in to my place, and rent their place out. because their apartment is rather old and run down, doesn't have elevator. That's the plan I have for my life...
You go girl, do what you like. Not for others
What are your plans when you get old or grow elderly as you put it?
Same, I'm living with my mom now too, I had a girlfriend and we were supposed to help each other, but it was mostly one sided and I was paying for everything. After losing my job at New Oriental we broke up and now I'm back living with my mom. I don't want to buy an house or apartment through mortgage, risking the apartment not even being finished and ends up a 烂尾楼 I'm lying flat due to covid and double zero, it affected me
@corn bread Thank you :)
@@chanakya_nan Don't know, save up some money and find myself a good retirement home maybe, with nurses stuff... don't know ,you never know what's going to happen tomorrow
“Why you not having a baby yet?”
“Why would I want to bring another life to this miserable world?”
“Understandable, have a good day.”
Congratulations China. The one child policy was indeed super effective.
Let's be real , raising children is a huge undertaking , no wonder nobody wants to do it
What's the point of having kids when everything becomes more expensive every year. 🤣 Better enjoying the world buying things we like.
If your parents are not given birth to you, would you come to this earth?
@@luckyb5151 My parents environment and our generation environment for raising children are different dumbass.
@@luckyb5151 Did he asked to be born? It is his wish to be born?
@@luckyb5151 If our parents didn't have us we wouldn't have the consciousness to know because we don't exist. What is your point? Life is so amazing?
@@luckyb5151 no I did not ask to be born and some days I wish I could just die.
It's a good thing to be single and childless. Life is so stressful nowadays. Why bring children into this world when they will probably suffer more than us?
I tell people "I spend 7 hours a day 5 days a week raising other people's children for so little that I'm still qualifying for food stamps. what makes you think I want to come home and take care of children when I can't even afford most of my needs"
I'm not Chinese, I live in the UK. I've never wanted children. I'm not against marriage but it isn't anything I pursued. I don't regret it either. I'd rather just be happy myself. Not making a fuss or problem for others and be free to make my own choices.
Well done
The video didn't talk about the demographics of China either. There are more men than women which naturally lead to more options for women which lead to greater expectations. The minimum expectation is house but China practice very chaotically regulated private housing market and now China has crisis in that sector which lead to many people not getting a house after paying for it.
That because girl babies were aborted or put up for adoption to westerners. China put a stop to adoption
Usually in industralized nations, the poor can't really afford them and have even less time and energy with their several jobs, while the rich at times are rather enjoying their wealth based freedoms without getting bogged down.
abusing people will sudden lockdowns is making the issue worse. Who wants to bring a child into such an environment?
The killing of all those baby girls has backfired.
It is too stressful to bring a child into this world without having time to be with your child. Marriage is not a guarantee for happiness either. Good development countries provide free education and health care for every child . Many countries in Europe subsidize food and money voucher to support families with children until 18 years old. That would help the families.
This is our last generation.
Thank you!
- Chinese Netizen
as well as all countries, not only in china..
Live life in quality not quantity. Me n husband took years to prepare ourselves financially and mentally and for actually enjoying ourselves to the fullest. The FREEDOM before having kids is priceless. From binge watching movies, playing games passed midnights and long couple vacations are all but a distant memories now. Once u hv kids, u cant even stay awake pass 10pm n dont talk abt vacations when all the holidays will be crowded n pack with other families with the same holiday schedules.
This does not last forever but at the time it seems that way. I would say that job no. 1 is to stay healthy long enough to be able to enjoy your retirement years and make it clear to your kids that you will NOT be around to mind their kids in any long term way. I am luck to be blessed with 2 daughters who never forget to say thanks for anything I do. I make it clear to them I do it for enjoyment of their company not out of any sense of obligation.
In a nutshell, it's the culture mixed with the restrictions of their social policy along with the high costs of living that is slowly bringing the demise of birth rates. Personally I don't think that it's just happening in China, as people around the world are faced with higher costs of living, the choice of having kids is a challenge. People have dreams and if settling down with a family isn't in the list, then it's more likely it becomes optional.
The part thats missing here, is that there are very few men that earn the kind of money she's looking for. And at 37, the men who earn that kind of money are looking for someone 10-15 yrs younger than her.
She is called the left over woman in China. If she can get married most likely becomes a step mom.
She's needs to lower her standards. Men who earn what she's looking for can marry someone younger who is more likely to birth them children. It's just the reality of the situation.
Edit: To clarify, she needs to lower her standards if she wants to find someone, but this doesn't mean having no standards, e.g., maybe someone less wealthy but has decent traits in other areas. It's far better for an educated woman wealthy to be single than for an uneducated, impoverished man who may pressure them to be the caretaker for their parents.
@@Umeshukitsune or she can stick to her standards. if she doesn't find someone, she'll be happily single than be with a poor guy
@@Umeshukitsune No Woman has _ever_ come out ahead by lowering her standards for men.🙅🏾♀️🙅🏾♀️🙅🏾♀️
@bird To clarify I mean lower her standards but not having no standards, e.g., maybe he's not as wealthy but still has a stable job and is kind.
I am in no way supportive of the "bare branches." They deserve the outcome they're getting for killing their girls. It makes me furious they kidnap and violate girls from my country and the government won't let them return home without giving up their children who are Chinese nationals.
I pity the first born girl..... She probably was overlooked for her brother.
Smaller population could make the citizens happier because of the reduced life competition and it's also good for climate change
Sorry you are wrong and very wrong. Now is not decreasing population problem but Now is too many old people and too few young people so the world is going to fail very soon.
China has 1.35Billion, China's infrastructure has been created to handle it, they should not go below 1.1Billion.
@@limlisa Glad to hear that because billions of people means more energy, food, water and other resources are required, which will make climate change worse
Will not have strong economic function
@@wendyshoowaiching4161 Singapore, GCC and Scandinavian countries are good economically
It's difficult in any East Asian societies. It's the same in Chinese populations in Indonesia, Malaysia, Singapore, Thailand, as well as Taiwan, S.Korea and Japan. So... It will be an uphill battle for China. It's an uphill battle for any Confucius societies.
don't put blame on Confucius.
what's difficult? children born in these countries dont have the burden of being single pressured by multiple generations to do well in school, earn good money, and have a son by the age of 30. they do, but this is usually spread among other siblings.
@@fool1124 I'm from S. Korea and it is quite true
@Smith Jerry read thoroughly. I said Chinese population in Indonesia,...
@@violetbluegreen9307 you learn Confucius in S korean?
I've been seeing lots of video talking about this topic to the point I wish people will stop talking about it simply bcs the decision came from reasons. We all knew the reasons. If you want people to change, you have to change the environment first, and that's what should be fixed first.
lovely comment section, ive really enjoyed reading. brings a lot of perspective to the way this world works in other people's visions
It’s all about treating humans as humans instead of robots.
“We don’t have ‘natural resources’, we have ‘human resources’!”
At 16:18 it's not fair to compare the two, as the pet shop owners are probably local - thus gets more help from the government, the other one with a family are MIGRANTS as she said herself. (you are recorded on your place of birth and you can only get help from your own province) and since they moved they are in an uphill battle to provide ( thus no public schools - they are not technically in the system for that) for their children, I commend them for their fight everyda for a better life. A lot of these parents would leave their children in the countryside because of this.
Yoooooooo our government studied at big university but can’t understand why young couples nowadays don’t have children or just 1??? Reasons are, cost of living, working hours, bills & bills. These are two main reason. If government can’t figure out the reason, then why are they still playing government 😂😂
They won't admit their own fault.
You only live once. Choose what you want and not what others want from you
It’s not easy to raise a child especially in China nowadays
I feel the govt was not completely honest with their ppl. Our adult kids in LA don’t want to have children bc they are saying how can they afford them when housing is ridiculous. I told them to leave but they love their jobs in La.
I feel bad for that family with the 4 children.
To have this kind of subject in china covered by singaporean, S korean, or japanese media is a bit strange, since all 4 countries have similar problem, but with less govt intervention and some have better immigration program for foreign workers to fill in the workforce needs 😂
Education level together with economic expectation work wonderfully as birth control
The problem with immigration is that it can cause problems if you do get them to properly integrate.
Iris Chen wants
1. A guy's salary higher than her
2. Got to have a house and a car in Shanghai.
3. The guy's height has to be 5 feet 9 inches(1.75 meters) and above or she will pass.
4. The guy has to be compassionate and emotional stable.
5. The guy's face has to be above average.
4. At least more compassionate and emotionally stable than her.
And the guy who got all that are the one who will want a women that is:
1. Young & Beautiful (20-25)
2. Feminine & Submissive
All so that they have legacies. Successful man have no need to have a successful women as a wife.
None of it is her. She is delusional. Why she thinks the top 1% man would want her is mind boggling
Lol 37 already still want so much?
She better believe in reincarnation, because shes not gonna find that what she wants in this life.
@@TemplarLove Maybe her list is much longer when she was younger. Now, the remaining 5 is her bottomline.
i use to live in BJ and worked in the teaching circuit and lawd......their schedule from the time of children to adulthood is STRENUOUS to say the least.
a number of them just move out of routine and don't really navigate in a way for themselves, but rather what's best for the collective (which isn't necessarily bad, but knowing when to switch that off is important).
the environment doesn't and hasn't cultivated that desire to have families.
The one child policy has virtually eliminated brothers, sisters, cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews. A bit hard to get your head around as a westerner. The cost of living crisis is worldwide at the moment and the cost of housing is out of control. One question I wonder about, in China, because of the one child policy, is there a disparity in the male/female ratios for that age group. A lack of suitably aged partners must add to the difficulties.
You're darn right there's a disparity between the genders in China. The parents generally see males as valued much more highly than females. A male carries on the family name and is also much more likely to get a higher paying job. So if you're only having one kid most Chinamen prefer a male.
Of course there's a disparity. Women are immensely valuable yet are not valued. A lot of female babies just went "missing". Guess what happened to them. Now there's a lack of women and they're drowning in the filth they created.
Yes there is. They were aborting firls babies, adopting them out ti westerners then the boys had no females to pick from so they went ot the Phillipines and Maylasia. From what I see those marriages don't end well. Cultural differences. China put a stop to adoption from westerners.
@@dsmith9709 What are the cultural differences that make these marriages so difficult?
@自由之声 We still love our families. We just need our private life.
I mean if they want babies why don't they make them themselves? Jeez these old people want young gens to make kids but pour their toxicity on them
With the rise of living and sameness in wages its hard to convince people to want to have kids when it's hard to provide liviing. We do not just want to have families we want to also enjoy the hard work and money (that means to spend on ourselves through pampering etc). thats just my pov. it may sound selfish but I want to travel the world and buy expensive things and enjoy luxury meals once in awhile rather than to invest it in a kid.
Yes you are selfish, at least you've admitted that. Your grandparents lived in the toughest of times and yet they've raised children. You are here, because they didn't have the same mindset as you do.
@@reconnaisance And your point is?
@@reconnaisance thats because they were not as educated or living in the modern age. Different generations different worries and priorities. Would expect u to have 10+ kids to show your selflessness :)
@@reconnaisance Some had kids so those kids could suffer to provide them with economic security later on in life. That is the same selfish reason some people have many children in the Philippine slums, other than ignorance of how human reproduction works. They are essentially living lottery tickets for some.
@@reconnaisance grandparents of that time have lots of children to help them farming. Children were resources in those days, but in today's world children are burdens
Wait, at 16:46 ,she says you can't send you children to public kindergarten if your a migrant worker? What kind of rule is that?!!
you can only get help/assistance from where you are born - think she may be from the countryside,( as many factory workers are) so in a way she is not the the 'government roster' for social assistance such as public schools, health care etc). it is a tough life. not really fair to be compared to he probably local pet shop owners
To live in a tier 1 city like Shanghai you must be a resident. Migrants can never get residency status. This means officially migrants don't exist. She and her kids can't access public hospitals, public schools, etc. In the place she was born she can access public hospitals and public schools. However public school quality in poor provinces sucks. All students in China take national level exams (gao cow) for university entrance. A single high stakes exam. Students get a national ranking. That ranking determines where/if you can go to university. Many students suicide if their ranking is low. China is a dog eat dog world. Here's another example. Let's say you are driving a car and you accidentally hit a person on an electric scooter. Paying a death burial is cheaper than paying the victim's medical bill. So, what do they do? Yes, the car driver will repeatedly rev forward and backwards running over the victim until they die. Here's another example, let's say some elderly person falls down in a public place. No one will help them. Why? Because there are no good Samaritan laws. If you help, you then can be held responsible for the elderly person's medical bills, an allowance to pay their housing while they recover, etc. It is an unbelievably cruel place.
The rule was made so overpopulation in one place and loss of resources in the extreme doesn't become an issue.
it is called hukou
The responsibility of having a family is demanding. Most of us will accept and see it as a way of life. Those who don't have their choices.
population reduction is absolutely essential in the 21st century for civilisation to continue in the 22nd century. Japan is leading the way, but China and the Western world are all on board. Now we've got to get the rest to slow down. To all Chinese people working less in order to be more creative, play more sports, look after family, do more volunteering in the community etc, I applaud you.
the economy works by having the young working to support the old, but 1 child policy made it so that there's no young to generate the economy to support the age care
Ask the Shanghai guy who said during the lockdown: '我们是最后一代' and you probably understand the reasons better than watching this documentary.
My parents ask me why i dont have children yet. I told them i dont want my children to become a pension fund.
its getting ridiculous everywhere rise of living and we are too crowed. there is no need to have children when you can't even afford to take care yourself..
I had a hair and makeup client from China the other day. The reasons she gave were ones a lot of us in the West also feel … the powers that be just want more slaves but there is little to no practical help.
Would you want children if you live in an authoritarian state with no freedom ?
xiaoyan has to change her outlook in life. the sons don't have to get married you know. she should be satisfied as long as they are independent and happy.