_I need to breed out the ugly_ 15 seconds later: _With this religion I can marry my cousin..._ I don't think that's going to work out as well as you think it will...
This video had me checking if the playback speed was set to zero on several occasions. Also, if the playback drunkenness was set to zero. Love you always, AA
Emperor Egbert Hildebrand is a fascinating individual. At once crippled, hideously deformed and plagued with illness, yet also strangely durable, like a craggy flaking boulder.
This is genuinely the first time I've seen somebody create a character I would classify as "Actively difficult to look at", I've had to tab away from the video multiple times because I genuinely cannot stare at Egbert for longer than three seconds.
AA: spends the game as an intensely ugly man marrying attractive women to breed out the ugly AA: "I'd like to thank my patrons, who are all extremely, extremely attractive..." Patrons: *nervous sweating*
firing your entire court to get out of debt when not a single one of your 74 HOLDINGS are making money because you’re over your limit of 7 is a power move. this is the kind of quality gameplay i come here for
Not to mention that he would have had far less problems with everyone hating him if he'd matched the local religion instead of picking one that the majority of his people view as evil and thus comes with a hefty opinion malus.
If you look at why they accepted, I think there was a +150 modifier for "marrying up", so they were only accepting for political reasons. "It's good to be king".
Works well if you turn on religious tolerance...if not, well...I hope you either have Christian Syncretism, or gave befriended them prior to marrying them. My Taoist Witch adventurer is happily married to a Muslim woman who has +100 opinion of him, but I romanced her before marrying her so I could invite her to camp
Quick fun fact: Larry Hogan was the governor of Maryland. Also, I am from Hagerstown. Exceedingly rare to see it represented in gaming. Only other place I’m aware of is part of the Fallout backstory.
"Pure blooded" in regards to nobility pretty much always means inbred... But that's a plus in aristocratic society because it "keeps the bloodline strong" and prevents "maladies of the impure peasantry" from corrupting the royal line!
I feel like ambigous amphibian plays games by just ignoring everything he possibly can lmao. "oh that's lord gwyn, the last boss of darks souls... whatever I'll just ignore it"
I must pause at 6:27 to state that I put this on while eating breakfast. Egbert's unattractiveness is so powerful that I am so repulsed I cannot stomach another bite of my food. The man could use his looks for psychological warfare, I'm telling you.
i think the reason she didnt hate the charafcter as much is because sexual dis-attraction isnt a thing if you arent of the sexuality thats attracted but im unsure.
I looked at the title and my brain went if it's a guy he can't look that bad. then looked at the character and my brain went sir you are just playing as my big toe. how can make CK3 character look that bad?
You know it's going to be a good video when, on finishing chargen and going to the realm select, AA's little guy looks like someone dressed up the baby from Eraserhead.
@@cgt3704The answer to that question is always both no and obviously yes. Paradox DLC is almost as bad as Warhammer 40K, both in cost and time you're gonna spend on it.
fun fact: the reason your first wife doesn't hate you is because attraction opinion only applies to the gender a character is attracted to, you married a lesbian and she as unattracted to you as she is to all men
Not quite there, you can do much worse in Oblivion and the character creator kinda forces it by having all the sliders connected including skin tone and age sliders connected to each other and all the others. Moving all the sliders in Oblivion to the left is more an exercise in futility but the results can be amazing lol.
@@JETWTF Oh I know of the monstrosities that can be made in the character creator lol. I meant the pre-made NPCs that try to look like normal human(oids) but just have this specific uncanniness to them.
He's a sultan alright. Assaultin' my eyes.
Marrying minors, too. Never forget Prophet Muhammed and his pedophilia.
I need a salt in my eyes
When even newborns who hasn't seen the sunlight yet has -43 opinion of you, you must done something wrong in life.
mfs in plato's cave could tell.
@@crossbo5345 He steps into the cave and they think his shadow is evil itself made manifest.
Boom
😂
"I will have them compete over how much they like me"
"no YOU like him the most"
"No yOU like him the most"
Nobody is gay for moleman
_I need to breed out the ugly_
15 seconds later: _With this religion I can marry my cousin..._
I don't think that's going to work out as well as you think it will...
This video had me checking if the playback speed was set to zero on several occasions. Also, if the playback drunkenness was set to zero. Love you always, AA
Well, he took the Pure-Blooded trait, so... heh heh
Pakistan moment
my life, the experience.
Hope it gets better for you
😮@@ambiguousamphibian
hope you can find and woo a maid
Don't worry, your bloodline can be redeemed from your genepool within a few generations.
Just rubbed one out for you bro🤝
Most attractive paradox gamer
Blushing
Emperor Egbert Hildebrand is a fascinating individual. At once crippled, hideously deformed and plagued with illness, yet also strangely durable, like a craggy flaking boulder.
He is blessed by Nurgle.
@@thebandofbastards4934 praise be to papa nurgle
He’s photo-realistic Meatwad
This is genuinely the first time I've seen somebody create a character I would classify as "Actively difficult to look at", I've had to tab away from the video multiple times because I genuinely cannot stare at Egbert for longer than three seconds.
He’s just the average American
worthy of Monster Factory
AA: spends the game as an intensely ugly man marrying attractive women to breed out the ugly
AA: "I'd like to thank my patrons, who are all extremely, extremely attractive..."
Patrons: *nervous sweating*
Money is quite attractive
firing your entire court to get out of debt when not a single one of your 74 HOLDINGS are making money because you’re over your limit of 7 is a power move. this is the kind of quality gameplay i come here for
Not to mention that he would have had far less problems with everyone hating him if he'd matched the local religion instead of picking one that the majority of his people view as evil and thus comes with a hefty opinion malus.
America moment
I am surprised that even a creature from Silent Hill is able to find a spouse
In these times, that creature could become a president!
So accurate! I just can’t stop laughing every time I see Egbert on screen 😂
7:55 As a Connecticut resident seeing fucking Ned Lamont in one of these videos gave me the most severe whiplash of my life
Ned Lamont is my favorite medieval European ruler
Malloy's son could've been treasurer
Milquetoast governor jumpscare
I like how we had Ned Lamont, governor of Connecticut as your cup bearer and Phil Scott, governor of Vermont as the court physician
What about Larry hogan from maryland
And did he take Kamala Harris as a wife?
@@hansstrudel9614 I believe so lol
"Let's ignore the plague and move on"
American government role-playing lmfao
Someone named Egbert Hildegard is gonna watch this and be like "Wait wtf"
They already know.
Crazy that this game opens every single campaign with the giant text saying "CUMANIA" in the middle of the screen.
Sperm Mania?
Cumans were cool
Thise darn Cumans, sacking Skalitz
Im feeling quite hungry
My daily grind personified:
Can you do an opposite run of this one? Literally make 5000 babies and take over the world Genghis khan-style.
Maybe as a mongol as well that would be interesting!
He’d need a mod to uncap the amount of kids you can have. The limit is 8 before the game starts actively trying to kill one of your kids I believe.
Literally would die laughing if that worked 😂
@@boltfantasticated970514 if you have concubines or 4 spouses. If you kill them it resets sometimes
@@boltfantasticated9705I had up to 15 baby's even as a African woman before.
Just take good care of them.
And give them a good education.
4:10 A soul still burns in the Monster Factory.
No middle sliders!
I need another Monster Factory video so badly (ToT)
No middle sliders!
Egbert quite literally looks like a wart-infested snail, and yet he now has a special place in my hear me out cake
77/6 holdings
Age of court guests 219
Wtf am I looking at?!
Omg the shady music when he starts talking about courting kids made me cry
That awkward moment when a purposely generated hideous character has had more romantic success in five minutes than I have had in a lifetime.
If you look at why they accepted, I think there was a +150 modifier for "marrying up", so they were only accepting for political reasons. "It's good to be king".
The ability to marry women by buying them from their local lord without any input from the woman does do wonders to your love life, I tell you.
@@someguycalledcerberus9805 -women- *children
The character only had success with virtual computer-generated people, so actually the same amount of romantic success as you.
It's nice to see that the baby from Eraserhead grew up and became a monarch
"Gertrude is objectively an ugly name" Ssundee says otherwise
I haven't heard Ssundee's name in over a decade, good Lord.
"whatever, let's just ignore the plague and move on" hm that sounds familiar
Crusader Kings 3, THE SCROTUM EXPERIENCE
Ah yes, my favorite historical setting, the city of Baltimore in 1066.
I wonder how it really looked at that time.
Trees
@@molybdaen11better
“He is only homely!”
_Good sir, your infant son has a flesh moustache._
11:57 I like how immediately after you say "we have to get those numbers up" her affinity for you dropped.
I love how much he naturally looked like Henry the 8th after adding the unattractive traits🤣
‘Unfortunately Catholic” I finally have a phrase to describe my family.
Bro running the United States of Alabama
9:51 an Islamic king, marrying Christian wives ... I'm sure THAT will not backfire at all.
Works well if you turn on religious tolerance...if not, well...I hope you either have Christian Syncretism, or gave befriended them prior to marrying them. My Taoist Witch adventurer is happily married to a Muslim woman who has +100 opinion of him, but I romanced her before marrying her so I could invite her to camp
"Breed the ugly out of the next generation!" The debatably dubious eugenics run.
CK3 exists so that Hoi4 players, bereft of the true 1930's Germany experience, can feel whole and...pure again
Come on, there's nothing problematic about a "Pure-Blooded" trait that gives buffs.
Yes yes buzzword eugenics
"Breed out the ugly"
Ah, good to see AA going for good old fashioned eugenics
If you are not breeding in ck3, you are playing it wrong 😊.
7:46 Hiring the former governor of Connecticut to prevent yourself from being assassinated is the most lukewarm security detail I’ve ever heard
Larry hogan was the recent governor of Maryland. It’s funny how he is in this mod
"This one is ok" as he hovers over a 9 year old is devious
Quick fun fact: Larry Hogan was the governor of Maryland. Also, I am from Hagerstown. Exceedingly rare to see it represented in gaming. Only other place I’m aware of is part of the Fallout backstory.
Cornflake homunculus
oh my god he made a thumb-thumb from Spy Kids
Club footed, but on the wooden leg.
You should name him "Please kill me now".
Ah yes, the Habsburg Everything.
,,With this I can marry my Cousin"
Yes, definitely 😂
I think this may be the first time I have ever genuinely been horrified on BEHALF of one of your poor characters. Well done sir.
"She's unfortunately Catholic so I'm going to have to divorce her."
1:14 Never thought Joe Biden was a thousand years old. Must be an anime character
Really? I thought that sounded about right.
"Pure blooded" in regards to nobility pretty much always means inbred... But that's a plus in aristocratic society because it "keeps the bloodline strong" and prevents "maladies of the impure peasantry" from corrupting the royal line!
so relatable, especially the trying to please your wife from a neighbouring kingdom who's language you don't know
4:30 ...not even zoidberg would eat that.
I had to stop at this exact point because I couldn't comprehend what I just watched fully
That thing in a crown and robe is Hilarious.
My man Egbert Hildegard of Mauf lookin like a newly sprouted parasol mushroom 👑
2:47 I'm not sure that overweight is unattractive at those times. I mean, if you're fat, it means you're rich.
I would think you fixed being club footed while being one legged... but your surgeon removed the wrong leg.
8:35 Larry Hogan is the former governor of maryland
This Nightmarish abomination makes me Physically uncomfortable and ill....Great Job!
Egbert’s reveal genuinely made me skip dinner, make it go away
I feel like ambigous amphibian plays games by just ignoring everything he possibly can lmao. "oh that's lord gwyn, the last boss of darks souls... whatever I'll just ignore it"
Please another 10 parts of this. I neeeeed it. Egbert need to recover his kingdom!
tbh i'd marry a mushroom too if it was showering me in money
"That is the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me."
"Wait, really?"
"Yes, most of the time its just horrified screaming."
4:16 David sculpture?
Yeah, a David Lynch sculpture
All the options for court physician are past and present state governors.
On my first playthrough of this game I made a man who looked like he had severe PTSD and hadn’t slept for days. He was also a torturer.
Sir, In medieval times being overweight was considered attractive as it meant you had a lot of food and wealth!
As an MD resident, hearing the AA say Hagerstown is almost surreal.
good to see that AA has adopted the no middle sliders ethos
your health is your wealth. now thats deep man, wise words.
Good news is that you were no longer over domain limit after that war.
King Egbert throwing HANDS from the grave right now
A new Ambiguous Amphibian video.
A fortuitous occasion.
Larry Hogan is actually the former governer of maryland so that was a double take for me, I was wondering where that came from
There are so many amazing quotes from this video
"oh no! I've transferred my veneral disease to my wife!"
I must pause at 6:27 to state that I put this on while eating breakfast. Egbert's unattractiveness is so powerful that I am so repulsed I cannot stomach another bite of my food. The man could use his looks for psychological warfare, I'm telling you.
The gasp when you named him. My very handsome Pepaw was named Egbert.... that being said, he did hate his name.
"fuck ned lamont" is a real slogan in ct. hilarious
Egbert Hildegard of Maud seeing this: ayo wtf
I love how you didnt notice tifit was a lesbian as well
lesbian just means try harder
@@ABoredGod I dont think those words hold up well out of context
Shouldve been a hint that her name was pronounced as "defeat"
i think the reason she didnt hate the charafcter as much is because sexual dis-attraction isnt a thing if you arent of the sexuality thats attracted but im unsure.
0:24 turned into an oblivion high elf
Egbert the Careless and Hildibrand Mandeville have been slandered this day
0:25 Wow, I didn’t know you could play as Asmongold!
Although, technically, he should have all the diseased treats too, considering his lifestyle.
Had a genuine LOL at the whole catholic revolt part of the episode XD
Who let a discord mod run the US?
The first Queen of the Modern Norwegian Royal Family was named Maud. Or Maud Charlotte Mary Victoria
So good to see homunculus representation in a game
David (Cronenberg) Statue
I looked at the title and my brain went if it's a guy he can't look that bad. then looked at the character and my brain went sir you are just playing as my big toe. how can make CK3 character look that bad?
Ah yes:
Man appears in the world
Tries to have coitus with his wife
Instantly dies
What a legend.
That would make a interesting plot for a adult film.
20:13 i don't know how you did it, but you gave birth to the protagonist of homestuck. i don't know what part of this is the most cursed
You know it's going to be a good video when, on finishing chargen and going to the realm select, AA's little guy looks like someone dressed up the baby from Eraserhead.
If you think the name Egbert is unattractive, you clearly underestimate the sex appeal of Speedy Eggbert my friend
Honestly, his face couldve been a good segway into a manscaped Ad 😂
Omg. He looks like Sterling's cornflake homunculus.
I like to make self-insert characters when I play this sort of game too.
I was not ready for the apearence reveal, looks like a vile molten snail in gravy
holy shit. I ate some mushrooms and watched this...I now have washboard abbs again. Thank you sir. lmfao.
PRINCE JOHN EGBERT
PRINCE JOHN EGBERT
WHIMSY
Guys i think he is turning into a paradox TH-camr...
Making me blush
Good. I needed someone to warn me if i should buy the next dlc paradox decides to make (depending on how much affects the game)
@@cgt3704The answer to that question is always both no and obviously yes.
Paradox DLC is almost as bad as Warhammer 40K, both in cost and time you're gonna spend on it.
@@plasticbazooka as a paradox player, i agree with your statement
fun fact: the reason your first wife doesn't hate you is because attraction opinion only applies to the gender a character is attracted to, you married a lesbian and she as unattracted to you as she is to all men
"The Ugly" @0:25 just reminds me of an oblivion NPC lol
Not quite there, you can do much worse in Oblivion and the character creator kinda forces it by having all the sliders connected including skin tone and age sliders connected to each other and all the others. Moving all the sliders in Oblivion to the left is more an exercise in futility but the results can be amazing lol.
@@JETWTF Oh I know of the monstrosities that can be made in the character creator lol. I meant the pre-made NPCs that try to look like normal human(oids) but just have this specific uncanniness to them.
This video is a great appetizer and moisturizer.
All hail the green reptile, for he blessed us again with a video one will take upon his soul with joy and gratitude.
@@daviddenver5883 Amen to that, brother.