Next movies you should do are The Bouncer, Kickboxer movies, Star Wars Movies, Indiana Jones Movies, In Hell, more Universal Soldier movies, Legionnaire, The Expendables Movies, The Way Of The Dragon, Enter The Dragon, Missing In Action movies, and more.
One time Seagal ran into Sven-Ole Thorsen at an airport, as each of the man's partners recognised each other. Seagal and Thorsen shook hands, however, Seagal immediately began trying to break Thorsen's thumb. Thorsen asked him to stop, Seagal did not, so Thorson tripped him over. Years later Seagal lured Thorsen onto his set to work as a stuntman and ended up hitting Thorsen in the artery on his neck with a "stunt" baton so hard that he passed out.
What will you do if Seagull gets wind that AI can make his movies without him doing anything? Anyone could deepfake Seagull in anything...hmmm...I just got an idea.
Every Steven Seagal movie in a nutshell: -Steven Seagal is either ex special forces or ex CIA or ex something -Everyone treats Seagal like the second coming of Christ -Steven Seagal will mumble his way through scenes or require the use of voice overs from other actors -Body doubles who do everything which includes walking, standing, and fighting -Loads of plot convenience -Steven Seagal will be portrayed as a hero but commits tons of crimes -Seagal will hook up with women younger than him -Movies will sometimes have sudden tone shifts -Multiple plot threads that go nowhere or are completely abandoned by the end of the movie -Whenever Seagal does fight, he’s either slap fighting or fighting sitting down and never has to reload -Fight scenes sometimes have plenty of shaky cam or jump cuts to hide Seagal’s weight or his stunt doubles -Every Seagal film is either set in Eastern Europe, Mexico, or Asia -Steven Seagal will always go to strip club even if it doesn’t contribute to the plot -Seagal’s movies will sometimes be a sequel to another crappy Seagal movie -Plots will usually resolve themselves in the first 20 minutes -Movies will abruptly end -Terrible special effects and green screen -Seagal will never hold a gun correctly -Whenever Seagal is in a team, everyone will either die or do nothing while he does all the work -One liners and jokes that fall flatter than Seagal’s “acting career” -The DEA or whatever government agency that Seagal works for apparently has jurisdiction over everything -Seagal will sometimes have a family that’s introduced at the end of the movie Anything else I forget?
It's nice to see Steven showing how versatile of a actor he really is. This military role presumably special forces is a role you don't see him tackle often.
😂 seriously though it’s crazy how he’s so arrogant that he’s spent an entire career playing this type of role without ever having seemingly just googled the absolute basics of how our military/law enforcement works. It’s like he thinks the army, navy, and CIA are just interchangeable or something. And you know no one on staff corrected him for fear of being immediately fired
According to numerous sources, every day after wrapping up filming, Seagal would stand at the on-set catering company's buffet line and loudly announce, in his "Cajun" accent, " Lawd have mercy, y'all 'bout to see a real attack force!'
Also, they always have his custom “Big Steve” order on deck: Two number 9s A number 9 large A number 6 with extra dip A number 7 Two number 45s, one with cheese A large soda
Me too. I wonder how much time he has to invest in one of these 12-15 minute videos.. It must be one hell of an effort cause the humor is brilliant and deliveries are spot on... Word class stand up comedians develop this skill of a timely delivery of a joke for years and you can really see how effortless it seems when Bill Burr, Gervais, Maher or Carlin does it.. Space Ice has that same level of execution. He's funny as fu**.
In case someone is actually interested, the voice double is because they decided to change the story in post production, and some lines had to be redone, and his majesty Steven Seagal couldn't be bothered to go and rerecord those lines, obviously because he cares so much about these movies, so they just had some guy who kinda sounds like him basically dub over him.
That makes perfect sense - but why even bother? It's a Seagal film, after all. Why not have all of Seagal's lines be of the generic type - "Cuz I'm o-one crazy MFer!" "Cuz I'm the best!" etc. - and leave all the exposition to *other* cast members?
Seagal hasn't made a new mega blockbuster hit movie since 2019. Sadly it looks like his money laundering, I mean movie career is over. But Ice still has a way to go before he's exhausted the entire Seagal filmography.
Sound Engineer: (Sighing heavily) "Steven, if you don't speak up you're going to have to dub all of this." Seagal: (in random person's voice) "That's what you think!"
Space Ices Steven Seagal reviews are literally one of the only things that actually get me to laugh - like a real genuine belly laugh not the fake throaty "aha ha" that I have to force out 100 times a day. Dude, seriously, thank you.
"not the fake throaty "aha ha" that I have to force out 100 times a day" thast really bleak, I am so sad reading this, I hope things change for you, really, all my love.
@@KonradvonHotzendorf You gotta watch out for Seagull's body double. The body double will race up the stairs and hold you there until the crew can get the lift up and raise Seagull to your level. Then Seagull will slap fight you until he gently and violently pushes you down in his killer move.
Sweet Jesus, with all the movies where Seagal is in the Navy, how the hell does he not know that branch of the armed forces doesn't have Colonels; they have have Captains?!
@@thethedeanshow I mean I just googled images of "fake navy ID" and found at least a dozen of them and none of them say colonel. Yeah it may be a minor detail but like how easy is that to not fuck up?
I’ve been binge watching all your Seagal movies this week. The humor, sarcasm, and your voice and narration is so great that I’ve subscribed with notifications! 😄🤘🏼
The problem is the movie's plot got changed by the production company. They watched the original "Harvester" which was about alien vampires coming to invade, but they decided to redo it about a drug where they were going to infect the water supply in Paris. So they had to go back and redo some of it. The odd thing is they recalled some of the actors to come back and reshoot some scenes but they never notified Seagal of the changes.
Look up the edited for TV clips of Die Hard 2. It's hilarious. They got a guy who sounded nothing like Bruce Willis to dub the swearing parts. One second he's Bruce Willis, the next he sounds like a black guy in his 50s.
I'm stealing that phrase! From now on, after I've finished eating my bowl of fiber-enriched cereal, I'm going to say, "Now I've got to go drop a Steven Seagal Special!"
Steven Seagal really believes he lived the life of the characters he played. Outside of him sleeping with a woman, while he's fully clothed, everything else is a fantasy
The fact that they filmed different versions of each scene but were too lazy to edit them out is absolutely hilarious. Like how they kept discovering that the water supply is contaminated 😂
Partly he whispered so much they couldn't hear him wrol enough and he refused to do post production, and partly the script was changed after the film was shot
It's because they rewrote the movie after filming half of it. The original movie was about aliens (which was why he killed tge two at the table, they were aliens in the og script) so instead of reshoots and fin8shing the original movie, they cut together what they had with dub overs in an attempt to recoup the lost money
I'm guessing to edit out some plot or because the mic wasn't on during the shoot. This movie was heavily edited from the original plot. It was originally about a alien taking over earth by taking over people's bodies. Then he changed it midway to be about someone trying to put drugs into the water supply. I believe he decided to change the plot midway through the movie which explains the very bizarre story and unusual turn of events.@@MotoVio
So happy to see how you've grown. I was there from the beginning. Thank you for the humour and for subjecting yourself to this horrible man's so called movies. You're a saint.
You just know that Seagal wrote "France, Europe" because he thought it made him look more original and imaginative than movies that say "Paris, France."
@@Illustraful I forget off of the top of my head, but either Bad Boys or Transformers. I'm pretty sure he does it often in many of his movies actually. Sorry I can't give you a specific scene or movie, but I remember it being odd.
@@nathanwilliams4005 A Michael Bay film is Citizen Kane compared to everything that the star of Beer Belly of the Beast and The Pietriot has made in the last 30 years.
The real mystery is how does Steven Sesgal keep making Mega Blockbuster Hit Movies where he's always showing the world something new every single GD time?
The only reason that Pace Ice is still alive after trash talking all these Seagal movies, is because he lives in space and Seagal's body doubles kept being sent to kill him without a space suite and they die in orbit. That's because Seagal thinks there's air in space.
Love this channel. Kinda glad to have just found it because I can back to back this shit for hours. No lie, it straight pulled me out of a depression I’ve had the last few months from just a few hours of straight laughs; probably like reset me biologically 🏋🏻. Great content, funny af.
There’s an entire other Space Ice clip dedicated to shredding ‘Attack Force’ and it’s right up there with this one - I recommend checking it out - it’s more Space Ice comedy Gold. Enjoy!
@@zakerycollins1950 He actually got the award for "worst director" and the all the other nominations were pretty much the rest of the categories like "worst actor", "worst picture" etc.
Worse is getting fat-kneed into a metal support beam by a senior citizen that drives a hummer who's from a city in France whos population is comprised of 99% US Navy. ROFL
F’ing win! Even on really bad days battling the big C, a new Space Ice review of whatever steaming pile of celluloid Sensai Seagal has dropped lifts my spirits and makes me smile. And I love how the kickass creator, content and everyone in the comments here makes watching feel like hanging out with friends. 👍🏻😄
Space Ice, "They need something stupid and they need it right now." Guy randomly drops into the room. Space ice, "Perfect." Comedy gold , as usual. Steven Seagal truly is the gift that comes giving, LOL!
Space Ice been watching your videos for a few months and have to say you provide the Holy grail of quality rank on Steven seagal I have ever seen!! Please do not stop making these gems for we all need to know how truly epic pompus and just stupidity runs through Steven seagals warped mind!! Love how plot contnunity esteem logic and grace just go right out the window when the akkido master writes his by definition greatest screenplays known to only him!! Martin Sheen being channeled by steven seagal shows just how much he does not care how the movies come out as long as he gets his paycheck!! Still boggles myself how he can slap the krap out of people and yet his lower body acts robotic even more than Robocop!! Also his stunt double really has an active career with being paid millions just for walking alone!! From mindless killing non discriminally to just ended his movies without any resolution proves steven seagal will not be stopped just rididculed and right so!!
the funny thing is, "might could be" is actually a legit saying people use in texas. i thought it was a made up saying until i worked in japan teaching english and a new girl from texas started in our company. she naturally would use "might could" in conversation all the time the worse thing about that is it might add a single shred of credibility if his character was actually from texas
That makes sense! Used to live in Ohio and people would say “This needs done” when saying they needed work done. Doesn’t make any sense grammatically but still was a part of the lingo.
You're a hero for pre-digesting all of this trash for us, the simple common masses. I've seen a few Seagal movies back in the day, when they were movies, but most of these I've nver heard of and here you are, like clockwork, bringing them to my attention without all the painful suffering of actually having to watch them.
Check out my Patreon for ad-free and uncensored videos: www.patreon.com/Space_Ice
Next movies you should do are
The Bouncer, Kickboxer movies, Star Wars Movies, Indiana Jones Movies, In Hell, more Universal Soldier movies, Legionnaire, The Expendables Movies, The Way Of The Dragon, Enter The Dragon, Missing In Action movies, and more.
One time Seagal ran into Sven-Ole Thorsen at an airport, as each of the man's partners recognised each other. Seagal and Thorsen shook hands, however, Seagal immediately began trying to break Thorsen's thumb. Thorsen asked him to stop, Seagal did not, so Thorson tripped him over. Years later Seagal lured Thorsen onto his set to work as a stuntman and ended up hitting Thorsen in the artery on his neck with a "stunt" baton so hard that he passed out.
They live, Kung Fu Hustle and The thing!
What will you do if Seagull gets wind that AI can make his movies without him doing anything? Anyone could deepfake Seagull in anything...hmmm...I just got an idea.
I do as well he is the man
Every Steven Seagal movie in a nutshell:
-Steven Seagal is either ex special forces or ex CIA or ex something
-Everyone treats Seagal like the second coming of Christ
-Steven Seagal will mumble his way through scenes or require the use of voice overs from other actors
-Body doubles who do everything which includes walking, standing, and fighting
-Loads of plot convenience
-Steven Seagal will be portrayed as a hero but commits tons of crimes
-Seagal will hook up with women younger than him
-Movies will sometimes have sudden tone shifts
-Multiple plot threads that go nowhere or are completely abandoned by the end of the movie
-Whenever Seagal does fight, he’s either slap fighting or fighting sitting down and never has to reload
-Fight scenes sometimes have plenty of shaky cam or jump cuts to hide Seagal’s weight or his stunt doubles
-Every Seagal film is either set in Eastern Europe, Mexico, or Asia
-Steven Seagal will always go to strip club even if it doesn’t contribute to the plot
-Seagal’s movies will sometimes be a sequel to another crappy Seagal movie
-Plots will usually resolve themselves in the first 20 minutes
-Movies will abruptly end
-Terrible special effects and green screen
-Seagal will never hold a gun correctly
-Whenever Seagal is in a team, everyone will either die or do nothing while he does all the work
-One liners and jokes that fall flatter than Seagal’s “acting career”
-The DEA or whatever government agency that Seagal works for apparently has jurisdiction over everything
-Seagal will sometimes have a family that’s introduced at the end of the movie
Anything else I forget?
🤣🤣 no my good sir, you're right on spot.
He sings, dances &/or plays guitar or makes some reference to the same in his past..
Yes he never takes a hit, ever. Nobody can touch him in a fight.
Don't forget "Seagal gets to wear whatever tf he wants even in situations where how you dress is extremely important"
Scenes that are too dark to see like a horror sim
It's nice to see Steven showing how versatile of a actor he really is. This military role presumably special forces is a role you don't see him tackle often.
😂 seriously though it’s crazy how he’s so arrogant that he’s spent an entire career playing this type of role without ever having seemingly just googled the absolute basics of how our military/law enforcement works. It’s like he thinks the army, navy, and CIA are just interchangeable or something. And you know no one on staff corrected him for fear of being immediately fired
His voice is versatile.
Credit where credit's due
Yeah never seen it before
Exactly
"France, Europe". Just one of many examples of Seagals legendary attention to detail as a writer.
And his masterful grip on geography... And his crotch chipolata.
Just in case people thought of the one in Asia.
Just making it clear for any confused american who might be thinking of Paris, Texas.
The first draft of the script probably said "France, Earth."
@@IllustrafulThat's far more geographical research than Seagal would be willing to do.
I thank Steven Seagal's utter lack of shame for launching SpaceIce's career.
even in the midst of darkest doom, hope springs eternal.
Crazy how Steven made Space Ice in a way. He might have to thank Stevey’s shamelessness too.
Spotting the OBGYN door is seriously some next level shit. Impressive.
😂😂😂😂
His parents must be very proud. I’m something of a spotter myself.
There's no bigger Steven Seagal fan than Space Ice. The only fan who suffers through every Steven Seagal "movie" so we don't have to.
I don't know how he hasn't got PTSD!
@@skylined5534 He probably visits a little bar in Thailand.
apparently Space Ice's IQ drops a point after every Seagal movie review.
Hold my beer 🍺 😂
There's s no bigger Steven seagal fan than Steven seagal.
“This is a restricted area. How can I help you?” Is hilarious
"This is a restricted area! Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart!"
It could've been better if he was smart and said, "This is a restricted area. Leave, or I'll call the guards."
Maybe he assumed Seagal was lost @@sharpfalcon6196
This is a restricted area. Go right on in.
That is pretty fucking funny.
"Being dead weight in a Seagal movie is Seagal's job, so now he's pissed." 😂😂😂😂
I had to pause the video I was laughing so hard.
Will never get tired of space roasting him 😂
Also Seagal kills so many innocent people in his movies... it's hard to guess if he's the hero or the villain actually. 😅
@@Gogetta80 Even if the movie doesn't star him!
I've watched this video multiple times and that line always takes me out. 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣
According to numerous sources, every day after wrapping up filming, Seagal would stand at the on-set catering company's buffet line and loudly announce, in his "Cajun" accent, " Lawd have mercy, y'all 'bout to see a real attack force!'
This line is actually funny, he can't have said that
Lmao 😂😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂 omgggg stop it
Also, they always have his custom “Big Steve” order on deck:
Two number 9s
A number 9 large
A number 6 with extra dip
A number 7
Two number 45s, one with cheese
A large soda
“They send 3 helicopters and one overweight senior citizen “ omg i lost it 😅😂
"And what comes next is one of the greatest fight scenes in history where he just kind of pushes him, killing him instantly."
I legit peed a little. 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣
@@TheeGlocktopus🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Hahaha omg me too 😂😂😂
I live for space ice Steven seagull drops.
Same ... I think I do too
Same
Same
Emas
Me too. I wonder how much time he has to invest in one of these 12-15 minute videos.. It must be one hell of an effort cause the humor is brilliant and deliveries are spot on... Word class stand up comedians develop this skill of a timely delivery of a joke for years and you can really see how effortless it seems when Bill Burr, Gervais, Maher or Carlin does it.. Space Ice has that same level of execution. He's funny as fu**.
"OMG get out of the way, you dead piece of sh*t" I can't with this guy😭😭😂😂🙌🙌
Being dead weight in a Seagal movie IS his job ..🤣🤣🤣🤣⚰️⚰️⚰️🙈
Punching her as fatly as possible. LMFAO. Props to Ice for bringing only the best and most realistic parts of the movie to life.
Fahahahaha!!!
@dennismcconnell4222he definitely said "fatly." 😂
Cumtown said Segal going fatly around a corner years ago in their Segal video. But still applies.
Well he is Michael Fatly.
HAS ANYONE NOTICE HOW STEVEN SEAGULLS ALWAYS SAYS “ 2 inch dick “? He uses it as a dissing every movie. HE MUST BE THE ONE WITH IT.
In case someone is actually interested, the voice double is because they decided to change the story in post production, and some lines had to be redone, and his majesty Steven Seagal couldn't be bothered to go and rerecord those lines, obviously because he cares so much about these movies, so they just had some guy who kinda sounds like him basically dub over him.
Kinda sounds like him? He sounds like Seagal the same way Dolly Parton sounds like James Hetfield.
That makes perfect sense - but why even bother? It's a Seagal film, after all. Why not have all of Seagal's lines be of the generic type - "Cuz I'm o-one crazy MFer!" "Cuz I'm the best!" etc. - and leave all the exposition to *other* cast members?
@@alexmuenster2102I thought that was the genius of attack force. It was too bad - even for seagull!
I thought it was because he mumbles and make some of his dialogue completely incomprehensible...
He was too busy with the next movie
i love how Space Ice can make his own plotlines that are far more interesting than the actual movie 😂
For me it’s the voice 😂
@@shayneb3540same his voice is hilarious and the stuff he says. I found him at 30k subs now he’s well into 300k unbelievable but well deserved
This channel is _so good,_ it makes knowing Steven Seagal has made this many films _almost acceptable._
heck I hope he keeps making them just so space ice can keep making fun of new ones
This entire thread as short as it currently is... Pure gold 😂
So what you’re saying is that Seagal is creating brilliant work, by proxy, because he gives Space Ice the raw material to work with.
Seagal hasn't made a new mega blockbuster hit movie since 2019. Sadly it looks like his money laundering, I mean movie career is over. But Ice still has a way to go before he's exhausted the entire Seagal filmography.
"By one overweight serior citizen" made me cry laughing 🤣
"In a Hummer..." 😂😂
ME TOO
😂😂😂
Nothing funnier than a polite insult lol!
"Mega blockbuster hit movie!" Hearing Space Ice recite this line brings me joy...so much so I've made it my text notification lol
Lol and "Where he showed the world" 😂
I like the way he so often says "So f you."
@@skylined5534my favourite part 😂
My favorite quote equal to yours is "None of this is ever mentioned again"
2:45 "What comes next is inevitable" (cutaway to henchman vomiting in toilet)
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
(stock man vomiting sound effect)
"and we officially reached the singularity of stupid" and the stairs fall on her. That cracked me up!😂😂😂
“Killing both her character and her career.” 😂😂😂😂😂
That's syphilis 😮
@@ianmangham4570 it's not syphilis
@@superchug2469 Say WHAAAAT! ,next time you'll be fkn telling me FITCH ain't nottin buy a trailer park BIATCH! 😧
😂😂😂
“Their guns are no match for his peanut butter safety seal.” 🤣🤣🤣
I died when he mentioned that😂😂😂😂
lol
crazyyy 😂😂😂
"Which he counters with the 'Quit it, Quit it, Quit it!' technique"😂😂😂
😂😂😂😂
That shit had me WHEEZING 🤣🤣🤣🤣
"Seagal's double handles the stairs situation" 😂 😂 😂
Sound Engineer: (Sighing heavily) "Steven, if you don't speak up you're going to have to dub all of this."
Seagal: (in random person's voice) "That's what you think!"
Part of me wants Steven to never stop making movies, but the other part of me wants Steven to stop making movies. The conflict is real man.
more movies, more cheeseburgers. 🍔
I wholeheartedly want no end to Seagal movies, as Space Ice reviews are one of the best things on TH-cam.
@@Jlundeen Haha, fair point.
More movies mean more space videos, so keep the movies coming. Have to launder that money somehow.
I would pay him to keep making movies. It shouldn't cost much anyway.
Space Ices Steven Seagal reviews are literally one of the only things that actually get me to laugh - like a real genuine belly laugh not the fake throaty "aha ha" that I have to force out 100 times a day. Dude, seriously, thank you.
FU the joke's on you for watching a Seagal film (just kidding).
It’s Seagal bullshit making you laugh
The line fat kneed a woman through a pillar again got me 😂 space ice is hilarious especially when seagul is involved
Space Ice gives Seagull man a purpose!
"not the fake throaty "aha ha" that I have to force out 100 times a day" thast really bleak, I am so sad reading this, I hope things change for you, really, all my love.
Seagal truly is a man of a thousand voices.
🤣
Literally. 😂
It was his voice double, as his natural voice is his mumbling.
And yet they're all somehow incoherent.
Your Half-Life videos are cool
4:42 Marshall Lawson? Are you kidding me!?😂😂 MAKE IT MORE OBVIOUS STEVEN
7:36
"They need something really stupid and they need it right now"
"Perfect!"
😂😂 I'm dead
me too lol! this channel is awesome!
Hilarious
Steven Seagal is the strange Uncle no kid is allowed to be alone with.
"Hey Billy, have you ever seen a grown man naked?"
@@skylined5534Do you like movies about gladiators?
@@skylined5534 Have you ever been to a Turkish bath?
Hey Billy come bounce on uncle Stevie's knee.
Space Ice, you really get us.
Your videos help us survive.
Space Ice makes fun of Seagal's movies with an air of confidence rarely seen in this day and age.
Why is Seageal gonna chase him down🤔 Just walk up some stairs to avoid the slap fight
@@KonradvonHotzendorf
Don't be so flippant, if sensei softcock sits in a chair to dispense some bullshido you're done for 😂
@@KonradvonHotzendorf You gotta watch out for Seagull's body double. The body double will race up the stairs and hold you there until the crew can get the lift up and raise Seagull to your level. Then Seagull will slap fight you until he gently and violently pushes you down in his killer move.
@@joelellis7035 🤪😂😂🍻
Sweet Jesus, with all the movies where Seagal is in the Navy, how the hell does he not know that branch of the armed forces doesn't have Colonels; they have have Captains?!
I mean, hardly anybody would notice that or care if they did
@@thethedeanshow I mean I just googled images of "fake navy ID" and found at least a dozen of them and none of them say colonel. Yeah it may be a minor detail but like how easy is that to not fuck up?
Also, you don’t call a Navy man soldier, you refer to him as sailor
"Something about the Navy not HAVING Colonels..." 😂
"Peanut butter safety seal" Didn't see that one coming. I'm dying here...😂
"The singularity of stupid..." Thank you Space Ice! Since you teached me that such a thing exists, I've gone fearless.
I think I've just lost 5% of my brain. Imagine the damage Space Ice took in reviewing the entire film?
I've seen this movie solo, only my cat by my side...
...I have been brain dead ever since(RIP my poor, poor brain)😞
apparently Space Ice's IQ drops a point after every Seagal movie review.
@@Zebra_3Still he won't be as braindead as Seagal
@@Zebra_3I'd rather say one loses IQ for every scene you enjoy from these movies.
I pray for anyone out there actually enjoying these shjtshows.
Space Ice repels it with a barrier of AWESOME and JCVD
I’ve been binge watching all your Seagal movies this week. The humor, sarcasm, and your voice and narration is so great that I’ve subscribed with notifications! 😄🤘🏼
His whole career has to be a money laundering scam at this stage
Not just body doubles, but voice doubles? A truly stupendous and revolutionary approach to one’s craft.
The problem is the movie's plot got changed by the production company. They watched the original "Harvester" which was about alien vampires coming to invade, but they decided to redo it about a drug where they were going to infect the water supply in Paris. So they had to go back and redo some of it. The odd thing is they recalled some of the actors to come back and reshoot some scenes but they never notified Seagal of the changes.
@@Dan-di9jd They knew Seagal would tell them to F off if they did.
He was just doing one of his infamous prank phone calls where he pretends to be Martin Sheen.
_"We're looking for a voice-double for Steven Seagal."_
_"I couldn't do Seagal's voice to save my life!"_
_"You're hired!"_
Look up the edited for TV clips of Die Hard 2. It's hilarious. They got a guy who sounded nothing like Bruce Willis to dub the swearing parts. One second he's Bruce Willis, the next he sounds like a black guy in his 50s.
Will Sasso!
@@Illustraful "Yippie-ki-yay, Mr Falcon."
@@sharpfalcon6196 Lethal Weapon edited for TV: "Let's get these funsters."
I thought *ATTACK FORCE* was what *SEAGAL* called his *daily morning bowel movement* 😂
It's what has on his phone calendar as the code for his daily assault at the dinner buffet at Golden Corral or Old Country Buffet.
@@aaronswink8554Haha!!
I also heard it’s his new *DATING TECHNIQUE* right after he slips them a *ROOFIE* 😂
It what he assembles when he sees girls scouts with cookies
Attack Farce!
This channel has changed my understanding of what a mega blockbuster movie really is.
How the hell does this channel not have a million subscribers?
Always looking forward to when Space Ice drops a Steven Seagal special 🤣
I'm stealing that phrase! From now on, after I've finished eating my bowl of fiber-enriched cereal, I'm going to say, "Now I've got to go drop a Steven Seagal Special!"
I actually thought Steven Seagal was a professional martial artist before watching your channel. Thankyou for the clarity.
That “walk of confidence” line has actually been used in his other movies before. He really likes it.
I'm not surprised, it's a rare thing in this day and age
Putting those lines in his movies is super easy for him, barely an inconvenience.
Seagull's 'wank' of confidence... Then secret shame and self-loathing.
Of course he's proud of it, he DOES walk with confidence. I mean, not backed up by ability, but confidence nonetheless.
@@joshuahoover6841putting lines in his movies about the way he walks with an air of confidence in this day and age is TIGHT!
“But he’s a student of Seagal’s and mastered the anti-terrorism technique of Nah-uh”🤣
“… is ever mentioned again.” is on track to becoming my personal tagline.
Imagine what it would take for Seagal to real feel ashamed if nothing he has done made him feel that way yet
Not even his calorie intake can shame sensei softballs.
Steven Seagal really believes he lived the life of the characters he played. Outside of him sleeping with a woman, while he's fully clothed, everything else is a fantasy
😂😂😂😂
11:17 I guess this girl refused to put her face on the plate, so the director said "That's fine, just slouch forward a bit, you look dead."
Seagal's patty cake technique is awe inspiring.
Got me saying Nyuk Nyuk!
Tried to play one of Seagal’s blockbusters and my TV self distruct :(
The fact that they filmed different versions of each scene but were too lazy to edit them out is absolutely hilarious. Like how they kept discovering that the water supply is contaminated 😂
Wat amazes me the most, is why in plain site he doesn't use his voice ? What's up with that ?
Partly he whispered so much they couldn't hear him wrol enough and he refused to do post production, and partly the script was changed after the film was shot
@@MotoViothey made some changes to the script and Seagal was too lazy to record his lines again
It's because they rewrote the movie after filming half of it. The original movie was about aliens (which was why he killed tge two at the table, they were aliens in the og script) so instead of reshoots and fin8shing the original movie, they cut together what they had with dub overs in an attempt to recoup the lost money
I'm guessing to edit out some plot or because the mic wasn't on during the shoot. This movie was heavily edited from the original plot. It was originally about a alien taking over earth by taking over people's bodies. Then he changed it midway to be about someone trying to put drugs into the water supply. I believe he decided to change the plot midway through the movie which explains the very bizarre story and unusual turn of events.@@MotoVio
From martial arts master to master ventriloquist. He has zero limits!
Ooh! Zero Limits..the next Steven Seagal blockbuster!
So happy to see how you've grown. I was there from the beginning. Thank you for the humour and for subjecting yourself to this horrible man's so called movies. You're a saint.
Only channel where I can hit the like button, even before I hit play and know it’s gonna be justified.
I'd pre-order these vids of his given the chance.
“France, Europe” had me in stitches 😭😭😭
You just know that Seagal wrote "France, Europe" because he thought it made him look more original and imaginative than movies that say "Paris, France."
I mean they are in France on the continent of Europe....
Maybe he is a fan of Michael Bay. "Los Angeles, USA." 😂😂
@@nathanwilliams4005 Which Bay film was that?
@@Illustraful I forget off of the top of my head, but either Bad Boys or Transformers. I'm pretty sure he does it often in many of his movies actually. Sorry I can't give you a specific scene or movie, but I remember it being odd.
@@nathanwilliams4005 A Michael Bay film is Citizen Kane compared to everything that the star of Beer Belly of the Beast and The Pietriot has made in the last 30 years.
The real mystery is how does Steven Sesgal keep making Mega Blockbuster Hit Movies where he's always showing the world something new every single GD time?
It's no mystery he's just that good
@@pencilcase8068
He's my personal saviour!
He's just a god amongst us mere mortals
@@pencilcase8068The man eats with an air of confidence that's rarely seen in this day and age.
Never in my life did I think I’d get excited by an alert saying “Steven Seagal Movie” until Space Ice came along.
7:35 "They need something really stupid, and they need it right now... perfect" 🤣🤣🤣
"One overweight senior citizen in a hummer" LMFAO 💀💀
If seagal didn't take himself so seriously, he would be an excellent comedian 😂. Seagal please drop more movies
If he tried to be funny he’d fail miserably.
@@cotati76 "i´m gonna snatch that motherf*cker birthday"
@@cotati76
That SNL set... Omg 😂😂😂
@@skylined5534genuinely uncomfortable... i felt bad for the other hosts 😂
@@cotati76 he did. See the one time he was on SNL. They never asked him to come back.
I'm dying from him disturbing the crime scene. He just smushed the dead guy behind the door. 🤣🤣
I LOVE your channel and humor, thank you and well done.
The only reason that Pace Ice is still alive after trash talking all these Seagal movies, is because he lives in space and Seagal's body doubles kept being sent to kill him without a space suite and they die in orbit. That's because Seagal thinks there's air in space.
Love this channel. Kinda glad to have just found it because I can back to back this shit for hours. No lie, it straight pulled me out of a depression I’ve had the last few months from just a few hours of straight laughs; probably like reset me biologically 🏋🏻. Great content, funny af.
"quit it quit it quit it technique" hilarious
"He weaponised patty cake." Lmao
You're a bloody legend mate 😂 make me laugh with such ease 😂 love these reviews
Every time I think you’ve covered every Steven Seagal movie, another pops up. How many god damn movies does he have ?! Not that I’m complaining
According to Google there are "at least 59" Steven Seagal films, so not even Google is sure about the actual number.
There’s an entire other Space Ice clip dedicated to shredding ‘Attack Force’ and it’s right up there with this one - I recommend checking it out - it’s more Space Ice comedy Gold. Enjoy!
@@lucas82 Jesus Christ! It’s true IMDb has him credited in 59 movies. Also he’s highly rewarded with 1 win and 11 nominations…
All for Razzy’s
@@zakerycollins1950 He actually got the award for "worst director" and the all the other nominations were pretty much the rest of the categories like "worst actor", "worst picture" etc.
"and we've officially reached the singularity of stupid" 🤣🤣🤣🔥🔥💯... I'm dead, I'm really dead! 🤣🤣
"Spirited round of miss Suzie..."?? I can't😂😂😂😂
"I've been making bad movies for like 97 years."
Steven Seagal
"Imma imma imma.. great bet when it comes to straight to DVD releases even though this is the age of streaming services"
Did Tom Segura send you? haha
I love Tom Segura routine on seagal
I was going to ask if AI wrote this movie, but I think AI would become sentient and become offended, then we have a Skynet level crisis on our hands.
I feel bad for space ice. He actually has to sit through an entire Seagal movie to make a video. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy.
And then rewatch to edit and do his iconic voice-overs!
Worse is getting fat-kneed into a metal support beam by a senior citizen that drives a hummer who's from a city in France whos population is comprised of 99% US Navy. ROFL
It is easy for him as he is spaced out on ice while watching it ..🤣
@@NoSlow78
Wait. Which France?
@@ItsMrAssholeToYou that’s a really good question lol
You’re doing gods work breaking down this garbage for us
Amazing, seagal once again proves he is the toughest guy in Hollywood by beating up more women than men and still struggling against them, 10/10
him and jarule are non stop humiliated by woman
"I'll chair slap the vagina out of you!"
That final fight was something else. It looked like an elementary school fist fight.
Don't bring a fist to a slap fight 😂
Which is ironically as far as sensei man boobs got in state education 😂
But the suspense was real. Is this the moment when a Seagal character takes one hit point of damage?
It was fierce!
F’ing win! Even on really bad days battling the big C, a new Space Ice review of whatever steaming pile of celluloid Sensai Seagal has dropped lifts my spirits and makes me smile. And I love how the kickass creator, content and everyone in the comments here makes watching feel like hanging out with friends. 👍🏻😄
I hope for nothing but the best for you.
Stay Strong Dawg! 👍
May your hedgehogs swarm like locust!
Space Ice, "They need something stupid and they need it right now."
Guy randomly drops into the room.
Space ice, "Perfect."
Comedy gold , as usual.
Steven Seagal truly is the gift that comes giving, LOL!
Space Ice been watching your videos for a few months and have to say you provide the Holy grail of quality rank on Steven seagal I have ever seen!! Please do not stop making these gems for we all need to know how truly epic pompus and just stupidity runs through Steven seagals warped mind!! Love how plot contnunity esteem logic and grace just go right out the window when the akkido master writes his by definition greatest screenplays known to only him!! Martin Sheen being channeled by steven seagal shows just how much he does not care how the movies come out as long as he gets his paycheck!! Still boggles myself how he can slap the krap out of people and yet his lower body acts robotic even more than Robocop!! Also his stunt double really has an active career with being paid millions just for walking alone!! From mindless killing non discriminally to just ended his movies without any resolution proves steven seagal will not be stopped just rididculed and right so!!
If Seagal is walking around set...it's a blockbuster alright.
😆
The only way to "enjoy" a Segal movie ❤
I wasn't sure if this is really the worst movie ever but you've made a very convincing argument.
You know the worst one is a Seagal movie but it's impossible to choose which lol
I saw _Attack Force_ a long time ago, and it is way worse then you can imagine. It took me months to recover.
🤣🤣🤣🤣 One minute in & I'm already rolling... what commentary!
12:26 "Their guns are no match for his peanut butter safety seal" 😂
the funny thing is, "might could be" is actually a legit saying people use in texas. i thought it was a made up saying until i worked in japan teaching english and a new girl from texas started in our company. she naturally would use "might could" in conversation all the time
the worse thing about that is it might add a single shred of credibility if his character was actually from texas
That makes sense! Used to live in Ohio and people would say “This needs done” when saying they needed work done. Doesn’t make any sense grammatically but still was a part of the lingo.
"After a quick ventriloquism contest... " 7:08 😂😂😂😂 epic
I laughed my ass off when Seagal learned the word asap and was all about that now 😂
I swear I was laughing so hard at that and the first comment I saw was yours right after. 😅
Treason Seagal almost made me choke to death on my tea. Well done.
The answer back to "no, not really" flowed so well... hahaha... oh man.
The quit it, quit it, quit it technique had me rolling😂😂
I rewinded that bit 52 times 😂😂😂
I'm seriously worried that one of these days Space Ice is going to lose his mind watching all these Seagal movies
Next he’ll be co-starring in them! 😂
I lost it at, "and they know their guns are no match for his Peanut Butter safety seal"
You're a hero for pre-digesting all of this trash for us, the simple common masses. I've seen a few Seagal movies back in the day, when they were movies, but most of these I've nver heard of and here you are, like clockwork, bringing them to my attention without all the painful suffering of actually having to watch them.
His character's name is Marshall Lawson? Seagal's level of cringe never fails to disappoint. 😂