@El Matadores You're telling the black woman that beyonce is an ugly bitch and you would much rather have a poster of this new black woman you found on your wall.
@jay everyone exaggerates when story telling...and it makes it better, stop being a pussy talking shit online when you know that in person you don't care enough to butt into a conversation about Diaz ans the only reason you do it here is bevause you want attention
Sure is. Tom appears on the Rogan podcast one time where he's telling a story about travelling with Diaz on a plane and they're both high the whole time. There are so many Diaz lines he delivers in his Diaz voice, it's fucking brilliant, not to mention hilarious.
Marty Sheersn joey diaz’s comedy is pretty good. Joe Rogan’s comedy is god awful. I like Rogan more as a personality and commentator than his cringe awful comedy
Foot L johnson yea there all gone now all those ittalian gangs are gone. Funny thing is the ittalian mafia still runs alot of buisnesses in new york its sad. All that blood money and the cops let them do it
Foot L Johnson dude I don’t get how so many people eat his shit up. I think some of his shit is funny but he constantly lies out his ass. he comes up with bullshit stories on the spot and tries giving them credibility by throwing in specific names or insignificant details. it is often painstakingly obvious
When I was 16 I got on a plane for a two hour flight ,I had an ounce of the stinkiest weed ever down my pants, I had wrapped it in a couple of freezer bags and taped it up half an hour into the flight I had to piss and when I unzipped the inside of the zipper tore the freezer bag open,now I tried to make a quick fix with the tape but when I went back to my seat I realized the whole cabin of this plane could smell the dope ,it was so strong I could hear everyone talking about it and passengers complaining to hostess's about the smell, it really was that bad, All I could think was there is going to be cops waiting at the airport and lucky I only had hand luggage as there was a bunch of cops near the bag belts, lucky it was busy I sped out straight into a taxi ,he said to me,I think you were suppose to get in the line there was people waiting ,I was ready for that and flicked a fifty dollar note at him and said just drive mate, it was funny because he replied in his Indian accent ,(OK were are we going sir, ), Finally I could relax.
@Ask Questions Later - I don't get that line at all but I sense that it is funny. What does a poster of Beyonce have to do with anything? Is it a taunt implying the woman in question is hotter? Could you explain ?
the comments saying Joey is racist and a womanizer...come on guys it's clearly in the context of a joke...how about turning off the PC radar, sit back, relax and have a laugh ...
You know I was going to really give you s*** about your comment but I just can't bring myself to do it only because of your profile pic got to love the ThunderCats
Uhh if you actually believe any of joeys story’s you must be on the spectrum . He’s entertaining but 90% of his story’s are just that. Storys and he makes most of it up as he goes
I've seen that happen before with people telling others to turn their phone off even in 2019 with planes having Wi-Fi now. Totally ridiculous to chastise another adult as if they're a child. I usually ignore them when they're trying to play "hallway monitor" or troll them until they escalate then they get kicked out or put in their place once they realize they have no power.
This is all well and good but don't forget that in 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum-security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem... if no one else can help... and if you can find them... maybe you can hire... The A-Team.
None of you bitches waited quietly with your brothers n dad at 7:59pm for that opening to start, if anyone missed it you were crushed for a whole week, my dad went out and bought a small black n white so he could watch the live pick 3, 4 and 6 on channel 8 at 7:59pm while sitting on the corner of the couch waiting for the beginning of the A-TEAM... and being a decorated Sergeant in the Army for 2 tours in Vietnam he fuckin lived vicariously through the A-TEAM because he definitely wasn't happy with his career as a gym teacher and football and wrestling coach, he'd much rather be the 5th member of colonel John Hannibal Smiths team
He's right though, if a cop confronts you about smoking, just be straight up. Unless you live in NYC or something 99% of the time they'll cut you some slack - some dude smoking a one gram joint before a flight just isn't worth their time.
@Foot L Johnson if you Google the locations and time periods he talks about most them are accurate. Even if they aren't hes still HAVING FUN. Might wanna try it sometime
@Foot L Johnson Lmao all you're doing is saying the same thing, just bealcause you think you are a human lie detector doesnt mean you are. growing up in a certain area wont let you sniff out everyones bullshit, id be willing to bet money that i can lie and you would have no idea and you know why? because you dont fucking know me or joe so how do you know every story he tells is fake, you're also acting like your opinion is fact. You arent a psychologist so you actually have no say in what you think you know what someone is saying.
@@donnyfrank2962 I get that aspect. But what makes us so frank? No pun intended. Like I have this same sort of psychotic attitude where I basque in the feeling of putting people in their place. Like I live for that. I wish somebody would talk to me that way on a plane. I'd have the same reaction. I've noticed it's like a North East thing. Jersey, NY, Mass, etc. Can overpopulation be the only thing?
It's an east coast, particularly New England thing. Massholes, New yorkies, and Jersey Mafia, we all have the same attitude. I grew up in Massachusetts, and living in Minneapolis now, I Miss the straightforward, get to the fucking point attitude, and if it hurts your feelings too bad.
@@donnyfrank2962 it's not like that here in Minneapolis where it's winter 9 months a year, like I said previously, it's a northeast/new England thing that I miss dearly.
If a person asks you nicely to do something nicely "DO IT !" and dont disrespect nobody period! Because you dont know what type of person your dealing with! Man Joey diaz is hella funny man 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣 ! I dont like it when people act stupid on the ✈✈✈✈. Joey Diaz is the man !
From now on I will tell all the black women I meet, that ima rip down the beyonce poster 👍👌
@S T Ξ Λ L T H cuzz she is beautiful
And by you saying that means that she is better looking...
I think
@El Matadores You're telling the black woman that beyonce is an ugly bitch and you would much rather have a poster of this new black woman you found on your wall.
S T Ξ Λ L T H dont need my beyonce poster anymore cause u so gorgeous
Haha I was trying to figure this one out, thanks guys
Had to come straight to the comments 'cause I was like what does that mean
Lee sounds like a kid being tickled by his aunt LMAO
Hahahaha !!!!
I love it. 😂
Jewish Pillsbury dough boy
lmaooo thats fkin hilarious
Best one I've read in a while
nothing beats a good diaz story.
@jay everyone exaggerates when story telling...and it makes it better, stop being a pussy talking shit online when you know that in person you don't care enough to butt into a conversation about Diaz ans the only reason you do it here is bevause you want attention
jay gtfo here lame ass.
DM gb72 bro you just made me realise something. I disagree with people on here but I wouldn’t do that shit in real life in person. My life is a lie
I'm sure Joey will agree with me, but coke will beat them
#facts
Tom Segura doing Joeys voice is perfect 😂
Sure is. Tom appears on the Rogan podcast one time where he's telling a story about travelling with Diaz on a plane and they're both high the whole time. There are so many Diaz lines he delivers in his Diaz voice, it's fucking brilliant, not to mention hilarious.
Idk how Joey doesn’t burst laughing hearing his spot on voice impression
Ash Chaya joes is spot on but bert hits those lower Joey quotes perfect
Yeah
“This fuckin’ asshole on the plane....”😂
Nobody makes Joey diaz laugh like Joey diaz. True legend
Will Pracy I have the same problem except Joey also makes other people laugh. Lmao
I always say that many many many years after Diaz passes away he's going to B just as Infamous is Keyser Soze
Theo Von always gets Joey cracking up hard too
Lmao 😭 hands down, best comment!
@@pinkberryconsumer4059 I hope that day is a few decades to come... Joey Diaz is the only thing I live for sometimes
You could be Johnny MMA... this leg weighs 265.
His leg weighs more than Joe Rogan.
Imma keep kickin you and your fuckin hitler buddy
Joey “my leg weighs 265” Diaz. LOL. What a great storyteller! Truly one of a kind.
For some reason I always imagine Joey Diaz being Nate Diaz father.
I thought his trainer was Joey. That's what led me to him lol
What, how? They're so completely different.
@@francois9747 there both bad muda fukas 💀
Epic comment
I thought that
Joey "I really opened up as a gentleman" Diaz
Ya gotta love this guy.
“I got these weeds under my nuts” LOL!
7:00 “They’re fuckin hawkin each other to death” 🤣🤣🤣
It’s a line that could have come out of the sopranos 😂
When your on the 20th Joey Diaz story video and you start to laugh like Lee. Take a 10 min break, Rinse and repeat.
😄
😂😂😂
No ones gonna talk about how tom looks like if lee had testosterone
Ooof
i tough lee started working out on one of those 0 insulin diets XD XD letdown
they bring it up near the end of the show
@@YANILLIONAIRE Wu Tang
Lee on TRT😂😂😂
Joey's German impression has me on another level right now. 😂😂
Im hurtin lmao
IndependentThoughtProcess it’s french lol
They were french
@@hawaiianprestigecars8493 ah, my mistake. Still funny though. Thanks for bringing me back to the clip. I needed to laugh today.
😂😂 love it!
@Luke so many sissies in Germany its crazy. Calling the cops for everything and anything.
The MALOOK eye 😂
I like Joey diaz more as a personality then a comic and he’s a damn good comic
Marty Sheersn then why even make your dumb ass statement to begin with?
Marty Sheersn joey diaz’s comedy is pretty good. Joe Rogan’s comedy is god awful. I like Rogan more as a personality and commentator than his cringe awful comedy
Pumpin George what the fuck is an away team
The Hash Minging Masher it’s a sports expression.
Herp All Day you need to smoke a joint and calm down sir
"The Sopranos was hotter than hell at that time, so I was having different incidents like this every weekend"
forgedabouted 😂😂 yeah fuck this guy
Foot L Johnson stories? That’s disrespectful to a lot of dead folks
@Foot L Johnson
You've obviously never heard of Bruno.
Nobody messed with Bruno!
(My Dad taught him English)
Foot L johnson yea there all gone now all those ittalian gangs are gone. Funny thing is the ittalian mafia still runs alot of buisnesses in new york its sad. All that blood money and the cops let them do it
@Foot L Johnson bro you are hurting these kids feelings out here 😂😂😂 be easy big guy, shit 😂😂😂
Joey Diaz lived 10 lives
Foot L Johnson dude I don’t get how so many people eat his shit up. I think some of his shit is funny but he constantly lies out his ass. he comes up with bullshit stories on the spot and tries giving them credibility by throwing in specific names or insignificant details. it is often painstakingly obvious
"Turn the phone off."
Joey Diaz - I'm about to get Sauer on these Krauts!
YOU'RE THE AWAY TEAM LOL
i love how this guy still exists and is himself in this "politically correct" time. my kinda guy.
versuliu 1 “it don’t apply to me.”
There’s not many like him left.
Gekyume Is the name lol did he say that? About pc culture?
Tenitri yes lol
That’s exactly why Joey is so important in these crazy times...I hope he lives to be a hundred🙏❤️
" his hitler buddy" XD
TS:Really?
JD: Between the cocaine and my attitude
I'm dyin.. 😂😂
Like national geographic lmaoo
When I was 16 I got on a plane for a two hour flight ,I had an ounce of the stinkiest weed ever down my pants, I had wrapped it in a couple of freezer bags and taped it up half an hour into the flight I had to piss and when I unzipped the inside of the zipper tore the freezer bag open,now I tried to make a quick fix with the tape but when I went back to my seat I realized the whole cabin of this plane could smell the dope ,it was so strong I could hear everyone talking about it and passengers complaining to hostess's about the smell, it really was that bad, All I could think was there is going to be cops waiting at the airport and lucky I only had hand luggage as there was a bunch of cops near the bag belts, lucky it was busy I sped out straight into a taxi ,he said to me,I think you were suppose to get in the line there was people waiting ,I was ready for that and flicked a fifty dollar note at him and said just drive mate, it was funny because he replied in his Indian accent ,(OK were are we going sir, ), Finally I could relax.
Nice..
Bullshit you had a full ounce down your pants
Good story for the comment section lol this is why I only travel with dabs. Much easier
Damn dude that’s scary
Spencer thats not that much?
Tom’s impression of joey🤣😭🙌🏻
I would sacrifice everything I hold dear in life to witness Joey arguing with those Germans in real life
'They were hockin each other to death you know however they talk'
"With the fuckin hee-ho or whatever they do the the hand"
Turn ze phone off
You don't just break the rules next to a german dude
Nein.
I would've acted the same fucking way bro, oh my Lord. I cant stand rude ass people.
Haha, white man bad
🤣🤣🤣🤣 Right? God, been watching this every so often and still laughing.
Joey’s German accent is gold. Lmfao 😭
Tom told an entire Joey Diaz story verbatim from Joey’s memories 😂 that’s impressive
"The stewardess was giving me the malook eye" haha
I cam hardly breathe! Beyonce poster, what a line. Top stuff JD
Ask Questions Later TREMENDOUS DAWG
@Ask Questions Later
- I don't get that line at all but I sense that it is funny. What does a poster of Beyonce have to do with anything? Is it a taunt implying the woman in question is hotter? Could you explain ?
@@kasper5688 Oh haha, I get it now. I was just confused as to why people were offended. Geez. It's hilarious.
maybe it's because of all the "cam" in your throat.
Right? Hysterical.
Germans love correcting strangers, especially here in Germany. It's a cultural thing though. They just needed a bit of a cultural exchange.
Germans can suck my fucking bratwurst and fuck off
And there it is, cultural exchange happening in this very thread
All y’all can fuck right off, caucasians have no culture so it’s not much of an exchange 😂🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
Foot L Johnson I was joking 😂 im half white & grew up in a white household you’re talking to one of very few hillbilly natives 😂
Foot L Johnson and. Absolutely no hate over here 😂 Merca.
the comments saying Joey is racist and a womanizer...come on guys it's clearly in the context of a joke...how about turning off the PC radar, sit back, relax and have a laugh ...
If they don't like...turn if off.
I thought we were safe here from the beta cucks, I guess not :(
Betas are everywhere bruh...everywhere I look....I see beta people.
@@Sneak248 never safe
I know this P.C culture has gone way beyond a joke, we need to go back to like it was in the late 70s early 80s
Lee’s laugh is the cherry on top
There's something incredibly satisfying about hearing Uncle Joey say "who the fuck do you think you're talking to?"
"You're 'missing' right now."
What a great fucking line. I'm definitely stealing that.
Joey "The most interesting criminal in the world" Diaz
Lol
“Turn the phone off” 😂😂😂 that shit gets me every time
I love Lees carebear being squeezed laugh.
If you squeeze a ball of humus it makes the same sound
@@ohnonotjo Lol what
You know I was going to really give you s*** about your comment but I just can't bring myself to do it only because of your profile pic got to love the ThunderCats
Joey "I'm rippin down the Beyonce poster" Diaz
Roronoa "Definitely watches Joe Rogan" Zoro
@@charlielambert9713 well you ain't wrong
I don't get it
@@chrisw5150 Neither do I. Rihanna much more pretty lady.
“Hssssssss he’s got ya there” OMFG LOOOOOL good god I haven’t laughed that hard in years
"Your little Hitler buddy" best quote ever😂
His diaz impression is utter gold.
Joey and Lee are two people you could literally listen to all day 😂
Joey had me dying @ 7:00 talkin about the German guys on the plane😂😂😂
The accent was unexpected ahaha
In all honesty these stories of actually somewhat restored my faith that there are some regular cops that are still good people out there
Plenty of them are regular people trust me on that.
Fonzie so you just assume ALL cops are assholes? i bet your instinct is Always right😂 dumber than bird shit i swear
Lol this only worked because it was Joey bro
Uhh if you actually believe any of joeys story’s you must be on the spectrum . He’s entertaining but 90% of his story’s are just that. Storys and he makes most of it up as he goes
Shane Knerr damn you just made up the story of that guys life!
Lee laughing Makes it 50× more funny😂
"you and your hitler buddy!"
ROFFFFFFFFFL
Lee's laugh at 12:10
I would love to dowload his laugh
That shit had me dying the whole time lmao
Next time somebody asks me if I've heard the good news:
"There's a God... I don't know if he sent his son to kill Jesus, or whateva."
“Sir, turnnnn zerrrr phone off!” *German accent LMFAOOOO
If I'm sitting next to Joey on a flight.....oh he's talking to me.
I've seen that happen before with people telling others to turn their phone off even in 2019 with planes having Wi-Fi now. Totally ridiculous to chastise another adult as if they're a child. I usually ignore them when they're trying to play "hallway monitor" or troll them until they escalate then they get kicked out or put in their place once they realize they have no power.
All time best story teller 👊🏽 😂
Lee sounds like a legit baby when laughing it’s infectious
Nah this might be my favourite joey Diaz story real or fake it’s ducking hilarious 😂
"When I get home I'm ripping down the Beyonce' poster!" LMAO.
Can't believe I only just found this I love Joey's stories. no sleep for me!
"You're missing right now" LOL
Lol Joey trying to fight would be the funniest thing I would ever see he would blow him self out in 3 mins
I fuckin love Joey Diaz. Ain't too many people that can have you in tears laughing like a little kid while just telling a story. 😂🙏🏼
"Your the away team!"...holy fuck 🤣🤣🤣
I love how all of Joey’s friends can impersonate him
The away team 😂classic
Okay first of all, that guys Diaz impression was damn good
Spencer Meunier “that guy”
This is all well and good but don't forget that in 1972, a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn't commit. These men promptly escaped from a maximum-security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem... if no one else can help... and if you can find them... maybe you can hire... The A-Team.
@johnny walker fuck you
@johnny walker exactly wat i thought
And fuk u crack head wat has that got to do with shit
Duh duh duh duh, dun dun dun. Duh duh dun dun. Dah du dun dun dun.. Still the best theme song to a show ever.
None of you bitches waited quietly with your brothers n dad at 7:59pm for that opening to start, if anyone missed it you were crushed for a whole week, my dad went out and bought a small black n white so he could watch the live pick 3, 4 and 6 on channel 8 at 7:59pm while sitting on the corner of the couch waiting for the beginning of the A-TEAM... and being a decorated Sergeant in the Army for 2 tours in Vietnam he fuckin lived vicariously through the A-TEAM because he definitely wasn't happy with his career as a gym teacher and football and wrestling coach, he'd much rather be the 5th member of colonel John Hannibal Smiths team
"Your fuckin Hitler buddy" I'm dyin
7:04 😂😂 This is why we fuckin' love Joey Diaz! 👏👏
That “national geographic women” line gets me every damn time🤣🤣
"Turn da fone off" 🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂
gonna rip down the beyonce poster? is basically saying i dont need that poster anymore after seeing you?
Jim McCracken they were asking a question. For someone to clarify it for the fuck nuts.
"Turn the phone off" In a joey diaz german accent is tremendouse.
He's right though, if a cop confronts you about smoking, just be straight up. Unless you live in NYC or something 99% of the time they'll cut you some slack - some dude smoking a one gram joint before a flight just isn't worth their time.
You are tripping, you always lie, i use to be a cop, they ask questions so they can arrest you, never admit anything, never ever admit a crime
7:28 When you are at a movie theater and the person next to you has their cellphone out during the movie.
Love from Germany ♥️😁
I’m in the library right now and that German story made me embarrass myself. I can’t stop laughing
I needed this after a long day. Thanks uncle Joey
“He’s got you there!”
the malook eye lol. Rip down the Beyonce poster...classic. Joey "panty dropper' Diaz.
@Foot L Johnson if you Google the locations and time periods he talks about most them are accurate. Even if they aren't hes still HAVING FUN. Might wanna try it sometime
@@TheIronWristFighters why do you take time out of your day to research this man's story
@@justcuz3324 he looked up his highschool pics on JRE. Enough research for me
@Foot L Johnson You literally have no idea what is or isnt true, so you saying its fake is just as believable as joey's stories.
@Foot L Johnson Lmao all you're doing is saying the same thing, just bealcause you think you are a human lie detector doesnt mean you are. growing up in a certain area wont let you sniff out everyones bullshit, id be willing to bet money that i can lie and you would have no idea and you know why? because you dont fucking know me or joe so how do you know every story he tells is fake, you're also acting like your opinion is fact. You arent a psychologist so you actually have no say in what you think you know what someone is saying.
11:40 Joey with his Miami Vice episode story lol
Ol' dude's giggle is something else...
How TF is Joey Diaz not on a no fly list lmao
Joey diaz's laugh is contagious 😁
Coming back to this video a year later because it’s the best
Joey be dropping 265 lbs bombs
I lost it when he said turn de phone off🤣🤣
0:42 spot on joey diaz “dowag”
Years later I only now realise that Joey does a Peter Sellers impression when recounting the "turn the phone off" story.
THAT IS A FRIEND FOR YOU! REMEMBERING WHAT YOU TELL THEM!
Sparking it up anywhere that's my dawg ! San Antonio Texas steppin thru high fiving Bergen New Jersey !
Jersey all the way. I wonder what creates this type of demeanor. I grew up 20 min. from Bergen and I would have reacted the same way.
Overpopulation.
@@donnyfrank2962 I get that aspect. But what makes us so frank? No pun intended. Like I have this same sort of psychotic attitude where I basque in the feeling of putting people in their place. Like I live for that. I wish somebody would talk to me that way on a plane. I'd have the same reaction. I've noticed it's like a North East thing. Jersey, NY, Mass, etc. Can overpopulation be the only thing?
@@JohnDoe-cd6ro Hmm maybe being cold half of the year plays apart. Everything is fast paced and people have no patience for stupid bullshit.
It's an east coast, particularly New England thing. Massholes, New yorkies, and Jersey Mafia, we all have the same attitude. I grew up in Massachusetts, and living in Minneapolis now, I Miss the straightforward, get to the fucking point attitude, and if it hurts your feelings too bad.
@@donnyfrank2962 it's not like that here in Minneapolis where it's winter 9 months a year, like I said previously, it's a northeast/new England thing that I miss dearly.
04:40😂😂😂
I barely caught the joke about bananas😂😂😂
He gets into arguments. I always get life stories from old women. I had one lady talk for a whole 2 hour flight. Hope you’re doing well Bernadette.
You forgot to tell her to shut the fuck up and that you're not interested in her son's life stories next time. That's where you went wrong.
I listen to Joey Diaz flight stories to help my flying anxiety.
"You're missing right now." holy moly!
If a person asks you nicely to do something nicely "DO IT !" and dont disrespect nobody period! Because you dont know what type of person your dealing with! Man Joey diaz is hella funny man 😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣 ! I dont like it when people act stupid on the ✈✈✈✈. Joey Diaz is the man !
The johnny MMA part was hylarious
When Joey Diaz puts a hand on your shoulder you know shits going down