Christ says if we look at another woman to lust after her, we've committed adultery with her in our heart. If we love Christ and being loyal to his high standard, we will easily look the other way when attractive women are around. Celebrate your victory over the flesh daily by only having eyes for your wife. Also communicate with your wife what you enjoy seeing her looking like - what she wears, how she does her hair, her nails, etc.- if you have a Godly wife, she will seek to please you and you will have even less temptation for looking at anyone else. Definitely cannot look at pornography. It changes your brain into an addictive state, proven by research. Also proven this brain change can be reversed if you stop viewing it for a length of time.
My husband‘s hidden addiction has destroyed our 21 year relationship. The magnitude of this fallout is devastating to entire families. It literally changes the whole way the addict goes through life, and looks at and treats people. Manipulation, psychological, and emotional abuse connected as well. No one talks about that.
I think it is wonderful to talk to your wife first! It's about respect and you didn't encourage the lady and if the wife is not insecure in her relationship she will realize this is a great idea
Thanks for sharing this, I am a huger, but I will be careful with this. I just love my brothers and I don't do it with bad intentions at all. My heart is humble but the others might not be.😢 Thanks.
I downloaded your books on Audible, that are available in audio. Can’t wait to read/listen to them. Now to get my husband to read them. I’m not sure if you cover this in your book or not but one thing I have learned, as a married adult in the church is that husbands and wives should not work in separate ministries in the church. They should always be together. I have seen more marriages fall apart because the husband or wife was connecting to the opposite sex through one of their ministries. This texting thing is also destroying homes left and right. Heard recently on a podcast that we are carrying around a “24/7 Singles Bar” with us now on our phones. Satan is in these things but how to do business without them? This was going on before cell phones but it wasn’t as easy then to play games with other people like we can now. It’s heartbreaking and it’s rampant in the church.
Hi friend. Thank you for sharing your concern for the church and how the culture is influencing us. We pray that our resources encourage and help you. However If you’d like to talk with one of our counselors (at no cost to you), call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT) Grace & peace, Ella L
I wish men would look more closely at the "Billy Graham Rule" and how it can hurt women. Billy could do this because of his job, and Mr. Jenkins seems to be okay, but it is not a biblical mandate. Some jobs cannot be performed ethically if you require a woman to bring a friend, so if youre someone who can't get that under control don't do that job. I'm not bringing a friend to a meeting with my lawyer, my doctor's appointment or my one-on-one with my boss. So if there is a valid reason for a woman to be alone with a professional and you can't do that, don't go into that profession. BTW, I've been married 41 adultery-free years, so it can be done.
We're so sorry you're going through this difficult time in your marriage, @markambriz6351. Please know that we will be praying, asking the Lord to provide healing and intervention. If you think it may be helpful to talk things over with someone, please give us a call at 1-800-232-6459. In the meantime, you may find this article helpful- bit.ly/3xhXK0c. We're here for you. -Luna H.
So what can I do to make my husband stop watching porn he sneaks watching it when I'm around and when I'm not around. He lies about it I don't trust him and also with female coworkers at work. I'm hoping to go to counseling we need help like yesterday. I'm tired 😢 God sees and knows everything.
We know how painful and confusing it can be to share life with a spouse who has a problem with pornography, and we’re sorry to hear about the situation you’re facing in your marriage. We invite you to talk with one of our counselors (at no cost to you). Please call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT). We’re praying for you and your husband. May God surround you with His never-failing love and care. -Paige W.
What if your husband is a cop and has to be trained by a female cop for a month. They would be alone in a car 12 hour shifts,3 times a week. My husband tried to talk to his Lieutenant about having a male officer trainer but he would not give him the request. What to do in this instance ?
Hi Arianna,Thank you for reaching out. Unfortunately, we’re not able to provide counseling through social media channels. We’ve found that writing or texting isn’t an effective way of offering advice when complex or serious life issues are involved. As an alternative, we encourage you to speak about your situation with one of our counselors (at no cost to you). Just contact us at 1-855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays from 6:00 A.M. to 8:00 P.M. (MT). The Family Help Center staff member who answers the phone will arrange for a counselor to call you back. One of them will be in touch just as soon as they’re able. You may also request a callback by visiting our Counseling Consultation & Referrals page - bit.ly/3olAU3N. We hope this is helpful. Grace and Peace, Ella L
So why did God make it so difficult for men with this? I understand we will all struggle as humans but the level he put on men to be sexualy pure is beyond any struggle I've seen. Every man on this planet struggles with this in some form or another I am just trying to understand why God made this such a struggle for men?
You’re supposed to grow as a Christian. This is part of the growing process, fleeing youthful lusts, get it? Like childish mind, like weak mind. There are many verses in the Old Testament and New Testament about overcoming weakness.
It's not God's fault. He gave us this desire for our own wives but Adam and Eve made mankind what we are today. Jesus sets us free from sin but we must still crucify our flesh because we still live in a fallen world ruled by satan.
It’s clear that you’re at a crossroads, and we want you to know that we care about you and your marriage, friend. We encourage you to stay close to God through prayer. He loves you more than you can imagine. We invite you to call one of our Christian counselors at 1-800-A-FAMILY (232-6459) any weekday between 6:00 A.M. and 8:00 P.M. (MT), who can answer your questions, encourage, and pray for you. We look forward to you call.- Jocelyn C.
I appreciate your approach to teaching!
What a great conversation 👍🙏👏
Millions of thank you
FLEE
FLEE YOUTHFUL LUSTS
FLEE
Amen brother
Great teaching
Glad it was helpful!
Christ says if we look at another woman to lust after her, we've committed adultery with her in our heart. If we love Christ and being loyal to his high standard, we will easily look the other way when attractive women are around. Celebrate your victory over the flesh daily by only having eyes for your wife. Also communicate with your wife what you enjoy seeing her looking like - what she wears, how she does her hair, her nails, etc.- if you have a Godly wife, she will seek to please you and you will have even less temptation for looking at anyone else.
Definitely cannot look at pornography. It changes your brain into an addictive state, proven by research. Also proven this brain change can be reversed if you stop viewing it for a length of time.
Beautiful!!!
My husband‘s hidden addiction has destroyed our 21 year relationship. The magnitude of this fallout is devastating to entire families. It literally changes the whole way the addict goes through life, and looks at and treats people. Manipulation, psychological, and emotional abuse connected as well. No one talks about that.
Thank you for this!
Beautiful!! I agree
I think it is wonderful to talk to your wife first! It's about respect and you didn't encourage the lady and if the wife is not insecure in her relationship she will realize this is a great idea
I wish all men took this approach 😞
Thanks for sharing this, I am a huger, but I will be careful with this. I just love my brothers and I don't do it with bad intentions at all. My heart is humble but the others might not be.😢 Thanks.
Bless you, but…… STOP HUGGING MEN, especially married men!!
I downloaded your books on Audible, that are available in audio. Can’t wait to read/listen to them. Now to get my husband to read them. I’m not sure if you cover this in your book or not but one thing I have learned, as a married adult in the church is that husbands and wives should not work in separate ministries in the church. They should always be together. I have seen more marriages fall apart because the husband or wife was connecting to the opposite sex through one of their ministries. This texting thing is also destroying homes left and right. Heard recently on a podcast that we are carrying around a “24/7 Singles Bar” with us now on our phones. Satan is in these things but how to do business without them? This was going on before cell phones but it wasn’t as easy then to play games with other people like we can now. It’s heartbreaking and it’s rampant in the church.
Hi friend. Thank you for sharing your concern for the church and how the culture is influencing us. We pray that our resources encourage and help you. However If you’d like to talk with one of our counselors (at no cost to you), call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT) Grace & peace, Ella L
Praying for you
I wish men would look more closely at the "Billy Graham Rule" and how it can hurt women. Billy could do this because of his job, and Mr. Jenkins seems to be okay, but it is not a biblical mandate. Some jobs cannot be performed ethically if you require a woman to bring a friend, so if youre someone who can't get that under control don't do that job. I'm not bringing a friend to a meeting with my lawyer, my doctor's appointment or my one-on-one with my boss. So if there is a valid reason for a woman to be alone with a professional and you can't do that, don't go into that profession. BTW, I've been married 41 adultery-free years, so it can be done.
Amazing Amazing amazing
Please 🙏 pray for my marriage my wife wants a divorce we have 2 teenage girls and 1 8yr old boy thank you for your prayers
We're so sorry you're going through this difficult time in your marriage, @markambriz6351. Please know that we will be praying, asking the Lord to provide healing and intervention. If you think it may be helpful to talk things over with someone, please give us a call at 1-800-232-6459. In the meantime, you may find this article helpful- bit.ly/3xhXK0c. We're here for you.
-Luna H.
So sorry praying for God’s protection
So what can I do to make my husband stop watching porn he sneaks watching it when I'm around and when I'm not around. He lies about it I don't trust him and also with female coworkers at work. I'm hoping to go to counseling we need help like yesterday. I'm tired 😢 God sees and knows everything.
Tough love... Look for Dr. James Dobson book on tough love. I believe it will help.
I have the same problem too.
Me too
We know how painful and confusing it can be to share life with a spouse who has a problem with pornography, and we’re sorry to hear about the situation you’re facing in your marriage. We invite you to talk with one of our counselors (at no cost to you). Please call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT). We’re praying for you and your husband. May God surround you with His never-failing love and care. -Paige W.
Me as well.
What if your husband is a cop and has to be trained by a female cop for a month. They would be alone in a car 12 hour shifts,3 times a week. My husband tried to talk to his Lieutenant about having a male officer trainer but he would not give him the request. What to do in this instance ?
Hi Arianna,Thank you for reaching out. Unfortunately, we’re not able to provide counseling through social media channels. We’ve found that writing or texting isn’t an effective way of offering advice when complex or serious life issues are involved. As an alternative, we encourage you to speak about your situation with one of our counselors (at no cost to you). Just contact us at 1-855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays from 6:00 A.M. to 8:00 P.M. (MT). The Family Help Center staff member who answers the phone will arrange for a counselor to call you back. One of them will be in touch just as soon as they’re able. You may also request a callback by visiting our Counseling Consultation & Referrals page - bit.ly/3olAU3N. We hope this is helpful. Grace and Peace, Ella L
Fight with prayer, …pray against strange women . Pray against temptation
You guys are doing amazing work in this dark world. I'm grateful for this teaching ❤@focusonthefamily
Thank you for the encouragement, @lowenatakiyah!
-Luna H.
So why did God make it so difficult for men with this? I understand we will all struggle as humans but the level he put on men to be sexualy pure is beyond any struggle I've seen. Every man on this planet struggles with this in some form or another I am just trying to understand why God made this such a struggle for men?
It’s disheartening 😞
That's why you need to be born again so you can repent and be sanctified. Have Godly sorrowful repentance.
I don't personally have the Baptism of the Holy Spirit. I suggest
you pray and fast for this. Maybe this will be given to you. It will
greatly help.
You’re supposed to grow as a Christian. This is part of the growing process, fleeing youthful lusts, get it? Like childish mind, like weak mind. There are many verses in the Old Testament and New Testament about overcoming weakness.
It's not God's fault. He gave us this desire for our own wives but Adam and Eve made mankind what we are today. Jesus sets us free from sin but we must still crucify our flesh because we still live in a fallen world ruled by satan.
How to do or want this if my husband already wants divorce?
It’s clear that you’re at a crossroads, and we want you to know that we care about you and your marriage, friend. We encourage you to stay close to God through prayer. He loves you more than you can imagine.
We invite you to call one of our Christian counselors at 1-800-A-FAMILY (232-6459) any weekday between 6:00 A.M. and 8:00 P.M. (MT), who can answer your questions, encourage, and pray for you. We look forward to you call.- Jocelyn C.
WAY WAY WAY TOO MANY COMMERCIAL POP UPS ON THIS WEB SITE
VERY VERY VERY DISTRACTING
I only had one commercial. Some people but the TH-cam service and don’t have any. Try that.
Never talk to much to your wife. Just give her everything you promised Jesus you'll give her.
What? Never talk too much to your wife????????
What does that even mean?
First part. BAD advice.
Second part: GREAT advice.
(Part of the second part IS connecting with and sharing your life with your wife. She needs that)
Gentlemen, TALK & LISTEN TO YOUR WIFE!!! And visa versa.