The Rise of Skywalker, and the Fall of Star Wars (Part 1)

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 พ.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 10K

  • @TheCriticalDrinker
    @TheCriticalDrinker  4 ปีที่แล้ว +1273

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    • @ZENMASTERME1
      @ZENMASTERME1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      “The only thing worse than a horrible film,
      is a film who thinks itself wise”
      ~ The Critical Drinker, Probably
      Now go away!

    • @sonsofmatriarchy5552
      @sonsofmatriarchy5552 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Shite definitely Shite, wahaha perfect!

    • @jamesjamieson6181
      @jamesjamieson6181 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Ah yes, i smell sh*te. 🤣😂🤣👍🏻

    • @TheMailmanOfSteel
      @TheMailmanOfSteel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      What if we just sent you a bottle of Patron?

    • @ehellstrom7127
      @ehellstrom7127 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I'm sorry you had to suffer through this shite, just for our amusement.
      And at the same time, I'm glad you did, these videos are going to be excellent! Pouring a glass of bourbon to toast your sacrifice!

  • @briarrabbit2468
    @briarrabbit2468 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9296

    So the Skywalker saga is actually the Palpatine saga and Palpatine takes over the Skywalker name and all the real Skywalkers are dead. Thanks Disney.

    • @LordCaedus-bl7wi
      @LordCaedus-bl7wi 4 ปีที่แล้ว +364

      This was never planned there was no plan. Emperor had a mistress and had a kid and their kid had Rey when the fuck did this happen absolute bullshit. The sequels are not canon

    • @pilouuuu
      @pilouuuu 4 ปีที่แล้ว +551

      Evil won. Sounds like Disney had that plan all along. It's pure nihilism.

    • @soulation
      @soulation 4 ปีที่แล้ว +264

      @DejaVoodooDoll shoo shoo, go away, this is a movie review video

    • @kevintanza6968
      @kevintanza6968 4 ปีที่แล้ว +304

      @DejaVoodooDoll Oh, great, socialist trying to come off as morally superior. Fuck off, you commie.

    • @fredjasper7378
      @fredjasper7378 4 ปีที่แล้ว +124

      @DejaVoodooDoll seriously. This whole statement is a turd sandwich

  • @itsmezeta4290
    @itsmezeta4290 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2367

    so you telling me..
    That anakin became Vader to save padme by learning how to bring people back to life, and Rey has mastered this skill without even knowing it exists? was it that easy?
    Damn Disney

    • @iloathepeoplewhorestilltal2774
      @iloathepeoplewhorestilltal2774 4 ปีที่แล้ว +306

      Bean Lord because it never fucking existed, they made baby Yoda do it first to validate Rey doing it, idek anymore, it’s all inconsequential.

    • @haillobster7154
      @haillobster7154 4 ปีที่แล้ว +219

      Well, I guess Vader was born into the wrong gender.

    • @gojiraguy200
      @gojiraguy200 4 ปีที่แล้ว +119

      She did steal the sacred Jedi texts, so her knowing this skill isn't the worst idea in the world.
      Too bad that defense is utterly ruined by the fact Ben Solo whips the ability out of nowhere. Thanks, Disney.

    • @rivalstein2769
      @rivalstein2769 4 ปีที่แล้ว +94

      Now all the past Sith and Jedi look like morons.

    • @senorjose1671
      @senorjose1671 4 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      @@iloathepeoplewhorestilltal2774 force healing did exist in legends I'm pretty sure, but the disney version is absolute and utter bulshit, everything about it deletes the point of the OT and PT, because somehow rey can heal a fatal lightsaber wound, and kylo can bring her back to life without any training

  • @alatriste2222
    @alatriste2222 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6582

    This is not canon Star Wars, this is fan fiction. The saga ended succesfully at The Return of the Jedi.

    • @deadangelmonument
      @deadangelmonument 4 ปีที่แล้ว +499

      alatriste2222 only it’s not even fan fiction , it’s people who aren’t even fans writing the fiction. and Disney as s whole especially regarding Kathleen Kennedy is just following their left fem Nazi wing agenda

    • @FantasticPyroclastic
      @FantasticPyroclastic 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      "succesfully"

    • @lovelydovy660
      @lovelydovy660 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Yep. Which is Y I always thought it was a bad idea 2 make more star wars movies. I was NOT excited 4 these movies 4 this exact reason. I was excited 4 the prequels & we c how that turned out.but at least that was Georges we work it had some good stuff in it.but it still was disappointing so I knew better than 2 expect these 2 b any good.

    • @Tensooni
      @Tensooni 4 ปีที่แล้ว +109

      Well, I liked rogue 1 & the mandalorian

    • @superuberjedimaster
      @superuberjedimaster 4 ปีที่แล้ว +156

      @@lovelydovy660 just a little off-topic. you know, these "''4"s and "'c"s are probably faster to write than the whole words, but they certainly take more time to process for the reader than the normal words. and I think the purpose of posting a comment is for someone to read it, not to write a comment faster

  • @jfkassnation5980
    @jfkassnation5980 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1947

    When Chewie first 'died' I felt relieved. He's out of his misery.
    When he was ressurected - I thought 'poor bastard'

    • @HouseOfAlastrian
      @HouseOfAlastrian 3 ปีที่แล้ว +115

      Can't help but think in my own headcanon that it was actually Han Solo who stuck Kylo Ren's lightsaber through his gut at the end of The Force Awakens. He glimpsed past the 4th Wall and saw the direction everything was headed and was like 'Fuck it, I'm out!'
      Doesn't make any less sense than the two movies that would follow.

    • @zwykyziomek2570
      @zwykyziomek2570 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      but he got a meal after all

    • @ssesssusman9417
      @ssesssusman9417 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @@HouseOfAlastrian I mean Harrison Ford would have done that too…

    • @davidchambers44
      @davidchambers44 ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@@HouseOfAlastrian LOL

    • @harbhh
      @harbhh ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😂😂😂😂

  • @thepunchableface1506
    @thepunchableface1506 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2017

    I cheered....... when Rey died
    I laughed.......when Kylo brought her back to life
    I cried...........when my PC rebooted half way through the film

    • @bbriggs7409
      @bbriggs7409 4 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      😭😭🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @richardadesmond
      @richardadesmond 4 ปีที่แล้ว +144

      I was legitimately uncomfortable when they kissed, fucking CRINGE!

    • @RebornVengeancex
      @RebornVengeancex 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      I'm going to steal this lol

    • @Alacard0malley
      @Alacard0malley 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      While your face is extremely punchable, you're also wearing glasses. Touchè.

    • @ricksflicks-
      @ricksflicks- 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Very Niiice!

  • @HpArtcraft
    @HpArtcraft 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4628

    Think about this -
    Anakin's entire fall to the dark side was because of his inability to stop his loved ones from dying. As he said, he could do nothing to save his mother in episode 2. Then he had visions of Padme's death in Episode 3, thus his obsession to save her grew so much that he turned to the dark side to try to learn how to save her.
    THE ENTIRE PREQUELS AND ANAKIN'S TRAGIC STORY WAS BECAUSE HE COULDN'T SAVE THE ONES HE LOVED FROM DYING!
    In Rise of Skywalker, Rey saves Ben from dying by touching him and then Ben just resurrects Rey from death by lightly touching her stomach for 5 seconds...
    FU*K DISNEY STAR WARS.

    • @MFields2178
      @MFields2178 4 ปีที่แล้ว +520

      Omg I didn’t think about that. Heck not even Palpatine knew that secret since he told Anakin they will discover it together. How the hell did Mary Sue find that secret?

    • @mish375
      @mish375 4 ปีที่แล้ว +241

      @@satireknight Is Rey supposed to be Star Wars Jesus now or something?

    • @carlosdeleon7755
      @carlosdeleon7755 4 ปีที่แล้ว +89

      Mish375 S she’s the avatar and YOU GOTTA DEAL WITHT IT

    • @alexhayden219
      @alexhayden219 4 ปีที่แล้ว +257

      I have thought about that. This movie spits in the face of the Skywalkers. It's not their rise. It's their humiliation.

    • @Rootz2000
      @Rootz2000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Great point.

  • @bartekenterprice5086
    @bartekenterprice5086 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2003

    They have found that dagger within first hour on that planet, while luke and lando have been looking it for decades... that's bullshit.

    • @herheartbeats5727
      @herheartbeats5727 4 ปีที่แล้ว +54

      Just plot device like a Dungeons and Dragons badly written role-playing game (or MMORPG). Everything is predictable from beginning to end.

    • @Sidious66
      @Sidious66 4 ปีที่แล้ว +109

      @@herheartbeats5727 kinda like how after Rey healed the giant worm thing it moved away from them and just so happened to knock down some rocks creating an opening for them to leave.
      I wonder what that reminds me of.... Totally none of the diablo games or anything.

    • @herheartbeats5727
      @herheartbeats5727 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@Sidious66 Hehe right...all the thing reeks of childishly plotted quests in order to come to the predictable end.
      .
      And of course, no use/non-use, of Rey's powers will have irreversibly bad consequences.

    • @kenburns4547
      @kenburns4547 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Ja Ja: Maybe Palpatine WANTED her to find it.
      But why would Palpatine make the dagger in Sith-language, if he WANTED Rey to find him? And why just make it a "treasure map" to ANOTHER treasure-finder?

    • @normadgarmez7026
      @normadgarmez7026 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Luke: I can't seem to find that dagger, we've been looking everywhere for it.
      Lando: Let's keep looking and see where it is.
      Luke: I think we should give up and let someone else find it.
      Lando: Good idea
      Seriously Disney

  • @sodagirl1092
    @sodagirl1092 3 ปีที่แล้ว +970

    Star Wars Cannon Lore: Korriban is the Sith Homeworld
    Star Wars Legends Lore: Korriban is the Sith Homeworld
    The Rise Of Skywalker: The Sith Homeworld is a planet you've never hear of before and that doesn't even appear in any previous media about Star Wars.

    • @KaizerSozaye
      @KaizerSozaye 3 ปีที่แล้ว +110

      Well that’s because The sequel trilogy is not canon!……obviously

    • @mhsilva6588
      @mhsilva6588 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      @@KaizerSozaye That actually makes sense, unlike this sequel

    • @roberthardesty4133
      @roberthardesty4133 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      @@KaizerSozaye Thank God...

    • @feco91
      @feco91 3 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      It's better this way. They would've found a way to ruin Korriban as well.

    • @sodagirl1092
      @sodagirl1092 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@feco91 Yeah, still sucks though because I was super hyped to see the ancient sith homeworld.

  • @ryankelley5160
    @ryankelley5160 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2501

    When Disney's Hercules has better character development than 90% of Hollywood's big budget films 23 yrs later.

    • @Ann-kv3yb
      @Ann-kv3yb 4 ปีที่แล้ว +122

      Bearing in mind how far from accurate the Hercules movie is to its own source material too, and compared to whatever the heck is this excuse for a Star Wars movie...yeeeeeeesh
      Edit: I still can't believe that the lady who greenlit and re-edited what this trash is now is supposed to be *the same lady whose production company brought us the Bourne Trilogy*
      Oh what a fall from grace this is.

    • @SteveSmith-ty8ko
      @SteveSmith-ty8ko 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Ann Look at it this way, there was probably a bunch of more qualified/talented people who took the reigns of that trilogy. I highly doubt she was heavily involved in the creative processes of the successful films she’s been apart of. (And that includes all the films where she first found work, under George and Spielburg.)

    • @Ann-kv3yb
      @Ann-kv3yb 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@SteveSmith-ty8ko I agree completely! I'm simply disappointed at the regression of quality in the projects she has, at the very least, touched upon. And be that as it may, she may consider the trilogy to be another trophy in her collection simply due to her name being attached to it (and thankfully having little influence, if her more recent track record is anything to go off of), and that I find that to be a very low blow if it is true.

    • @Dime_time333
      @Dime_time333 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Guess you....just watched Hercules again huh? Loves james woods as Hades

    • @palaiologos4441
      @palaiologos4441 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @@Ann-kv3yb Hence why *everyone* in Greece despises this movie (probably includes the actors behind Greek dub who probably did it because they were contractually and governmentally obliged to)
      A live-action remake of Disney's Hercules would probably be the most hated thing in Greece

  • @HealingMetal
    @HealingMetal 4 ปีที่แล้ว +964

    This movie felt like a fever dream. The story telling and pacing reminded me of when a kid tells you a story and keeps saying "And then, And then, And then"

    • @thac0twenty377
      @thac0twenty377 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      hahaha

    • @christopherbrown9529
      @christopherbrown9529 4 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      And if you can ever say "and then" in-between your scenes, they are shit. It should always be "As a result" or something similar to tie it to the consequences of the previous scene. Not in JJ land! The only good JJ was Jameson

    • @baxternelson9533
      @baxternelson9533 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Haha so true, dude. I also watched Max Landis on RLM

    • @Thee_Deputy
      @Thee_Deputy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      My headcanon is that this is just a bedtime story Mando tells Baby Yoda.
      He had nightmares that night.

    • @RRRRRRRRR33
      @RRRRRRRRR33 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      It's dragon ball z in space, the escalation is all over the place. That moment when the emperor shot a bolt of lightning to the sky, I laughed hard. Rey and kylo are like goku and vegeta, they fused their powers and got more stronger than a God. Rey crossing the lightsabers, lol The writer from batman v superman just surpassed his masterpiece!

  • @tonydumbty7003
    @tonydumbty7003 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1488

    Palpatine is now deader than before, but he'll be fine.

    • @zorro456
      @zorro456 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      I'LL BE BACK!

    • @SennaHawx
      @SennaHawx 4 ปีที่แล้ว +96

      "Unfortunately I was killed....BUT I SURVIVED!"

    • @mutoprime6641
      @mutoprime6641 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      It was good to hear him say DEW IT though

    • @TheRealBruceWayne01
      @TheRealBruceWayne01 4 ปีที่แล้ว +65

      Nope he is definately dead now because a woman killed him this time and not a man.

    • @portalj
      @portalj 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Bruce Wayne
      True
      Forgot that’s how reality worked.

  • @ethanbroussard
    @ethanbroussard 3 ปีที่แล้ว +916

    Jj Abrams, the guy that made a star wars movie titled “The Rise of Skywalker” then proceeded to kill off the only remaining Skywalker (by blood) and make a palpatine steal the name.

    • @M60A3
      @M60A3 3 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      I would like to report him for identity theft

    • @barryallen2240
      @barryallen2240 3 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      @@M60A3 Identity theft is not a joke rey

    • @Chaddlee
      @Chaddlee 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      TWIST!

    • @harrambou9468
      @harrambou9468 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      The only SW movie with a clickbait title.

    • @intention4726
      @intention4726 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@harrambou9468 no The Last Jedi is obviously clickbait. Luke says "I will NOT be THE LAST JEDI" so yeah

  • @SavageRicktator
    @SavageRicktator 4 ปีที่แล้ว +543

    Basically Disney took the Star Wars franchise to essentially create a princess in the galaxy. Who is the descendant of Emperor Palpatine and taken everything away from the Skywalkers. Rey makes it through the long divorce court settlement and gets full custody

    • @Lonewolf-ei5yv
      @Lonewolf-ei5yv 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      And defeating the patriarcy once and for all! Joke aside I think you are correct. She did get the house that wasn't hers.

    • @kylecyrus9457
      @kylecyrus9457 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I'll be disappointed if this comment isn't in the top 10 tomorrow

    • @tsopmocful1958
      @tsopmocful1958 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Precisely.
      Now we just wait for the series of animated musicals featuring Princess Mary Sue of the Galaxy defeating a whole list of men in brave and stunning ways.

    • @g.w.7893
      @g.w.7893 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      There's nothing quite like the force (ALIMONY).

    • @123mandalore777
      @123mandalore777 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @Glen tennis Well said. Disney's trilogy feels like it was made by someone who saw the ads for Star Wars, saw all the pop culture and references, but never saw the movies themselves. Then tried to make a new Star Wars based on second hand info alone. It has all the iconic imagery, but everything just works wrong.

  • @seanfoltz7645
    @seanfoltz7645 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1466

    The sad part is that the movie was so bad that when they pretended to kill Chewy I simply shrugged, not caring whether it was a fake out or not.

    • @scribeofrebirth1431
      @scribeofrebirth1431 3 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      “Disney Sequel Fake Out Death!!!”

    • @saberiandream316
      @saberiandream316 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Whereas the EU actually made you care about and feel the weight of said death.

    • @robertfitzgerald3118
      @robertfitzgerald3118 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Same here. And when he reappeared, major eye rolling followed...

    • @fictiontheorizer1991
      @fictiontheorizer1991 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It's funny I have felt that way since the Clone Wars 2008 series!
      "I'm not a cynic. I'm just ahead of the curve." - You know the rest.

    • @seanfoltz7645
      @seanfoltz7645 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@fictiontheorizer1991 I actually didn't mind the second trilogy - yes, it was a different flavor than the first and while I didn't care for the parasites being the reason you have the force, it was otherwise enjoyable and "close enough" in feel and flavor to the original.
      But this third trilogy was hands down the Chinese knock off version and a bad Chinese knockoff at that - we're talking paint flaking off and damaged pieces right out of the box and just getting worse from there.

  • @GQBouncer
    @GQBouncer 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1812

    "They can fly now??" - Says the former storm trooper...

    • @voivodadracula1936
      @voivodadracula1936 4 ปีที่แล้ว +212

      Finn has no problem slaughtering his former comrades so that isn't shocking

    • @Anonyomus
      @Anonyomus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +125

      Way to ignore character's back story like "nah, it'll be fine".

    • @wheeliebin18
      @wheeliebin18 4 ปีที่แล้ว +85

      @@voivodadracula1936 And he'll do it with a smile on his face, a fist pump in the air and a "WOOOOO!" in his heart!

    • @armandovillarreal6721
      @armandovillarreal6721 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      Literally even the clones flew

    • @leejones8582
      @leejones8582 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      they fly now.

  • @seanives-ll7sj
    @seanives-ll7sj ปีที่แล้ว +178

    I was 12 in 1977. The impact of Star Wars at the time was amazing. It was everywhere, everyone was talking about it. Luke Skywalker was who I and my friends wanted to be. What they did with the new films seemed like an attack on those memories.

    • @MSpotatoes
      @MSpotatoes ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I was only born in 79 but star wars was still everything and everywhere. I watched new hope until the tape was worn out and the audio sounded all warped. What Disney did is an attack. Tear down the old so they can insert their "new" when the new has no soul.

    • @HB-zt1ed
      @HB-zt1ed ปีที่แล้ว

      its a planned attack. They want to destroy all our heros, because all male are toxic. Dont accept this bullshit. It is not Star Wars. Just delete it from your thoughts.

    • @DarthAngel2
      @DarthAngel2 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I was born in 2003 ROTS was my first introduction to SW and I've loved episode 3 since. After I've saw every movie and my regret was watching the Disney ones cause it just makes me upset how they ruined the magic in that galaxy far, far away.

  • @mangotango8115
    @mangotango8115 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3017

    Remember when Yoda himself went to the sith homeworld in Clone Wars?
    And it was really easy?
    And everyone knew about it?
    And it wasn't this place?

    • @bemotivated8443
      @bemotivated8443 4 ปีที่แล้ว +410

      Don’t compare that great arc to this trash movie

    • @iananderson606
      @iananderson606 4 ปีที่แล้ว +400

      The actual, established for more than a decade before this diarrhea of a movie sith home world, is Coraban.

    • @buek14
      @buek14 4 ปีที่แล้ว +429

      Yup. Actually the Sith already have 3 major planets. Korriban/Moraband, Malachor, Dromund Kaas. Yet this shithole of a trilogy doesn't even mention them.

    • @Сайтамен
      @Сайтамен 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      I wouldn't tell that was easy...I think no one but him could survive there.

    • @ahumanname7791
      @ahumanname7791 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      @@buek14 Isn't Ziost also one or am I losing it?

  • @JerBuster77
    @JerBuster77 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1867

    Luke had to go to a dark swamp planet to master his jedi training. Rey just basically closed her eyes, went all "I know kung fu" on the force and suddenly knows every jedi trick in the book. Yeah...this was bad.

    • @logicaldude3611
      @logicaldude3611 3 ปีที่แล้ว +141

      It's funny that they TRIED to fix one of the biggest criticism's of her character, which was that she never really trained at all. But they already made her so overpowered that by the time this movie comes around you're like, "Wait, SHE TRAINS NOW? Why?"

    • @scratchy996
      @scratchy996 3 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      @@logicaldude3611 Exactly ! First she knows everything, and it's a mystery why she's so strong, it is hinted her parents might have something to do with it.
      Then the second director guy says :" Screw that, the Force is female !"
      Then we find out she was genetically engineered by Palpatine, that's why she is ...aaand she's training now.

    • @TheJarman9
      @TheJarman9 3 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      There was no tension after she bested Ren in the first movie. It’s like they don’t know story telling basics

    • @M60A3
      @M60A3 3 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      She obviously bought lootboxes

    • @kainashhsu
      @kainashhsu 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      She’s obviously pay to win duh

  • @nicolashrv
    @nicolashrv 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1161

    SPOILER !!!!!!!!!!!
    How did Palpateen survive? He got into a fridge in the Death Star.

    • @emilioalvarez7745
      @emilioalvarez7745 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      nicolashrv lmaooo

    • @EtherDais
      @EtherDais 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      If only han had considered this, he might still be alive. Maybe he should have stayed Frozen in Carbonite

    • @cajun4455
      @cajun4455 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      He was “dead” at the beginning of the movie, but I think that a lot of people’s questions would be answered if they watched the movie

    • @nicolashrv
      @nicolashrv 4 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @@cajun4455 so...a dead guy cloned Snoke?

    • @vsear5911
      @vsear5911 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      He got into a secret hidden compartment in somebody's coffin

  • @Lobomaru02
    @Lobomaru02 3 ปีที่แล้ว +138

    In Legends, the Unknown Regions are unknown because of the difficulties of exploration. Scout ships have to find reliable hyperspace routes, and then they have to update the starcharts. And that's if they get back to known space in one piece.
    Simply put, Legends has a good reason to call them the Unknown Regions. Disney just thought the name sounded nice and dramatically imposing. *tosses back a shot* Fuck off, Disney!

    • @timoteoseagedetoffol8795
      @timoteoseagedetoffol8795 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      And in fanfictions: Earth is part of Unknown Regions !

    • @lobalemon-7800
      @lobalemon-7800 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      And from memory there were even attempts to establish outposts and colonies in the unknown regions, but simply the difficulty getting there and the hostility of the surroundings meant that they weren’t viable.

    • @Oturan20
      @Oturan20 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@timoteoseagedetoffol8795 I never understood that. Isn't it supposed to be a galaxy far far way?

    • @timoteoseagedetoffol8795
      @timoteoseagedetoffol8795 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Oturan20 It's fanfictions. Don't be afraid.

  • @Activated_Complex
    @Activated_Complex 4 ปีที่แล้ว +447

    Spoilers, if anyone still cares. But nobody watching this does.
    Disney: “See? We fixed Rey. She’s OP because of her lineage. And she loses a fight!”
    Fans: “You ‘fixed’ a Mary Sue by making her a princess and heir apparent to the entire galaxy, but she’s so good and perfect that she turns it down? And then having her come back from the dead, to become the dubious heir to the Skywalker legacy, with no one else left to share the glory, and all their force ghosts telling her how great she is? Effectively making all nine films all about her?”
    Disney: “Uhh... hey, look, there’s Baby Yoda!” (runs away)

    • @colonelburton8451
      @colonelburton8451 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      I hope the new trilogy is about a gay, black, transgender mermaid who is more good and powerful than Rey. This cis-binary white supremacist mindset in the original 9 movies is so bigotted. It would be great if the supreme being in the galaxy would exhibit more diversity.

    • @WayoftheDave
      @WayoftheDave 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      You just hate strong independent women you misogynist

    • @iansheppard339
      @iansheppard339 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      So she becomes the avatar and then goes to fight the fire lord

    • @Parabueto
      @Parabueto 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Not gonna lie, if Rey had killed Palpatine, turned evil and Ben killed her with his grandad's lightsaber that would have been seriously ballsy.

    • @TheStraightestWhitest
      @TheStraightestWhitest 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@Parabueto I was silently hoping that would happen.

  • @samuraipapi
    @samuraipapi 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4188

    I'm gonna tell my kids that these were sequels to Spaceballs

    • @FerDeLance06
      @FerDeLance06 4 ปีที่แล้ว +294

      Better yet, don't even mention them to your kids

    • @Kubadaniels
      @Kubadaniels 4 ปีที่แล้ว +531

      dont insult spaceballs

    • @captain0080
      @captain0080 4 ปีที่แล้ว +260

      Please dont do that to Space Balls 😭

    • @armorx9638
      @armorx9638 4 ปีที่แล้ว +124

      I'm with Kuba and captain, don't insult spaceballs like that.

    • @Prushinthespirit
      @Prushinthespirit 4 ปีที่แล้ว +133

      What have Spaceballs even done to you? Unlike new trilogy, it definitely knows what it is and what it serves for.

  • @lucassmith8841
    @lucassmith8841 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2200

    Jesus, Space Balls had more respect for Star Wars than Disney has. And JJ makes Michael Bay look like Steven Spielberg.

    • @napoleon4153
      @napoleon4153 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Good one XD

    • @sirdorkster
      @sirdorkster 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Hey, stop getting your panties in a twist. It's voiding you of critical thinking.
      Since Rian fucked up the second movie, JJ tried his best at damage control.

    • @TaoScribble
      @TaoScribble 4 ปีที่แล้ว +104

      @@sirdorkster Why do you keep repeating that phrase to whoever mentions JJ? It's making you sound like a bot.

    • @Soridan
      @Soridan 4 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      @@sirdorkster I'm sorry someone dared to imply that your mancrush isn't perfect.

    • @mkaleborn
      @mkaleborn 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Truer words never spoken. Nice!

  • @JesseJ588
    @JesseJ588 3 ปีที่แล้ว +168

    "But then Rey goes for a walk! And Chewie goes after her, but then he gets captured because hes and idiot now I guess." Had me dying. 🤣

  • @NicholasBrakespear
    @NicholasBrakespear 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2036

    Wait, so Palpatine had Snoke create a planet-sized super weapon... to hide the fact that he was building a big fleet of ships?
    HOW COULD HE AFFORD ANY OF THIS?
    I feel like Palpatine's true power was just that he had... all the money, literally ALL the money in the galaxy.

    • @ArlanKels
      @ArlanKels 4 ปีที่แล้ว +214

      Not to mention that building the starships underwater on a planet would be...impossible?
      Yeah I'll go with impossible.
      It'd make more sense if they were hidden in an asteroid field or somesuch.
      They could've had them even realize "The asteroids, they're all hollow?"
      Because they hollowed them out for resources.
      Kerblooby.

    • @LothlorianOG
      @LothlorianOG 4 ปีที่แล้ว +76

      Or he had one of the star forges from the KOTOR series.

    • @garethoneill5676
      @garethoneill5676 4 ปีที่แล้ว +174

      where did they get the crews for all the star destroyers if the Sith planet is supposed to be in some secret place. Literally thousands of people would have had to make journeys there - without wayfinders!

    • @LothlorianOG
      @LothlorianOG 4 ปีที่แล้ว +87

      @@garethoneill5676 that was my biggest problem as well. I mean did the entire First Order magically appear? Were they just manned with a skeleton navigation crew? Who knows.

    • @sheridanfalkenberry5611
      @sheridanfalkenberry5611 4 ปีที่แล้ว +57

      it WOULD explain why everyone else seems to be so completely dirt poor

  • @manuelarturog
    @manuelarturog 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2314

    "Disney is the worst thing to happen to Star Wars since the Holiday Special", that was gold LOL.

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 4 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      I got instant PTSD, when he said that.

    • @jessemathes5126
      @jessemathes5126 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Don't do that to the Holiday Special. At least the special's got Bea Arthur in it.

    • @Mgkm15
      @Mgkm15 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jesse Mathes lol

    • @khfan4life365
      @khfan4life365 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      The Holiday Special is cute in that acid trip sort of way. The Disney trilogy is just bad in a kidney stone sort of way.

    • @Xehanort10
      @Xehanort10 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Disney is like the masturbating Wookie from The Holiday Special.

  • @Ramash440
    @Ramash440 4 ปีที่แล้ว +567

    What's bothering me is that ... if Exogul is so hard to find and get to, then why did they even bother trying to hide the Sith fleet under the ice ?

    • @persona83
      @persona83 4 ปีที่แล้ว +80

      So it could make a cool and dramatic entrance.

    • @skleem4871
      @skleem4871 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Lmao right

    • @lukestrawwalker
      @lukestrawwalker 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I've seen that somewhere before... where was it???....
      th-cam.com/video/iAMaNv4hYY4/w-d-xo.html
      Ah yes, there it is... and SO much better... :) OL J R :)

    • @Xiphactinus
      @Xiphactinus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Belka will rise!

    • @herheartbeats5727
      @herheartbeats5727 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Not only that but how could a planet with such terrifyingly unstable and extreme thermal, gravitational and electromagnetical conditions just hold water on it's 3 possible phases ? Seriously ????
      EVEN on a real-life planet like Mars, which is so close to Earth in physical conditions, we know that water will be very hard to find on some phases.
      Plus, not even a point for the story, because in fact, having covered the Exogul(gol ?) planet just with rocks just would have changed nothing (after all if you can hide super-destroyers the side of an European country under sea, cannot you just hide them under rocks ?).

  • @goldengriffon
    @goldengriffon 2 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    Chewie's death could have been quite impactful. Rey could have had some significant character development, facing the fact that her undisciplined emotions brought her to the dark side and led to her killing him. A humbling failure that sets the hero back, yet also plants the seeds for growth. But Chewbacca figures are one of the few Star Wars toys that actually sell, so Disney couldn't have that.

  • @swa7169
    @swa7169 3 ปีที่แล้ว +656

    Luke was searching for the second Wayfinder, but gave up. Rey finds it in literally a couple of hours.

    • @kankeydong2500
      @kankeydong2500 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      what a crock of shit...

    • @fabriciolamana4106
      @fabriciolamana4106 2 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      *How convenient*

    • @bigorange2082
      @bigorange2082 2 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      In a giant sandpit that’s a different color than all the other sand around it.

    • @steveouk90126
      @steveouk90126 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      To be fair: she followed his lead. It's a bit like Obama ordering Osama ibn Ladin killed after all the years the rest of the world pursued him, running him down and taking his resources; and the Liberals all praising Obama for the last 5% of work.

    • @BertoxolusThePuzzled
      @BertoxolusThePuzzled ปีที่แล้ว +27

      It's just a shame Luke had absolutely no experience exploring desert planets... Oh wait...

  • @Megatron_95
    @Megatron_95 4 ปีที่แล้ว +708

    Oh, Emperor Palatine. Sorry that you had to be dragged into these films

    • @johnnyrico7228
      @johnnyrico7228 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Raised from the dead to be kicked...lol..the light side is ruthless..lol

    • @freakindamnshiki
      @freakindamnshiki 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      well it is poetic justice, Palpatine came back to finally kill the remaining Skywalkers and have his bloodline poach the entire name! he wins

    • @aurex8937
      @aurex8937 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Ironic, isn't it?

    • @Megatron_95
      @Megatron_95 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@freakindamnshiki true. And seeing as how Rey is a Palatine, her kids may follow in the path of the dark side if she were to have any

    • @krisjorstif
      @krisjorstif 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I think his inclusion has to be one of the most jarring things they came up with. What the actual?

  • @Sammo212
    @Sammo212 4 ปีที่แล้ว +511

    FYI, force healing has been around for a long time too but its supposed to be incredibly rare AND extremely difficult...so of course Rey can just do it now.

    • @sandraday6955
      @sandraday6955 4 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      and it is hinted it is on the dark side of the force probably because to return life you have to steal it from somewhere.

    • @forsakenvipoerx9077
      @forsakenvipoerx9077 4 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      @@sandraday6955 Kotor has it as a light side ability.
      I'd say the Sith equivalent of that ability is to move life from one thing to another. (sith can swap bodies so, i'd say a dark version of force heal is very possible.)

    • @ryanmarr5243
      @ryanmarr5243 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      @@forsakenvipoerx9077 pretty sure the sith equivalent of force heal was force drain but it was never shown draining ones own life to heal someone else. Like a sith would ever do something like that.

    • @forsakenvipoerx9077
      @forsakenvipoerx9077 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@ryanmarr5243 i was referring to that.

    • @ryanmarr5243
      @ryanmarr5243 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      @@forsakenvipoerx9077 Still would've required great study/practice. Not "Hey it's my first time performing any kind of surgery but lets try and replace this guys heart before he passes."

  • @emperorlelouch8515
    @emperorlelouch8515 3 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    If Disney had any sense, they should have scrapped the live-action sequel trilogy after discount A New Hope and instead used the excellent staff of The Clone Wars to create an extensive animated TV and film series out of the Extended Universe.

  • @silkoth69
    @silkoth69 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1117

    Remember when tie-fighters were short range fighters that couldn't function on their own in deep space? Obi Wan remembers.

    • @akish302
      @akish302 3 ปีที่แล้ว +90

      That makes more sense. Why would the empire waste money on thousands of hyperdrives?

    • @Undomaranel
      @Undomaranel 3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      Obi-Wan also remembers things from a certain point of view, so go ask anyone else who was there before we get another Robot Chicken song number.

    • @zacharyfindlay-maddox171
      @zacharyfindlay-maddox171 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Or that time fighters could only fly in space

    • @Soundwave142
      @Soundwave142 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      At first I thought you said, “tri-fighters,” and I thought they had advanced droid brains, and realized you meant “TIE”. The First Orders’s TIE’s were are vastly improved versions of the original TIEs, but you have to have some logic, you would not be able to stuff a hyperdrive in that small frame. Which is one reason Vader’s was bigger.

    • @olafgurke4699
      @olafgurke4699 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @@Soundwave142 I mean, You can add a hyperdrive in a small frame. X-Wings have them too, after all. That said, Tie Fighters were never supposed to have them. They are designed as short-range interceptors, unlike the X-Wing. Just saying "First Order Tie's are more advanced and now have hyperdrive" is just... as unimaginitive as the rest of the trilogy. It would fit right in, honestly.

  • @OcarinaSapphr-
    @OcarinaSapphr- 4 ปีที่แล้ว +518

    I didn’t want to risk alcohol poisoning, so I took a shot of water every time something incongruous or dumb happened... & I drowned...

    • @insensitive919
      @insensitive919 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      F in peace.

    • @absanchez777
      @absanchez777 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Don't worry I did the drinking challenge. And fuck me it's just autocotrect fixing my shit at this point got I had to pause so I can keep up with the drinking because the fuck ups are just back to fucking back

    • @liammcnulty1987
      @liammcnulty1987 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      F

    • @larrymenconi5287
      @larrymenconi5287 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lolololol ....permission to use that

    • @zacharyloiselle734
      @zacharyloiselle734 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      F

  • @darthportus
    @darthportus 4 ปีที่แล้ว +678

    I don't understand why didn't they kept Korriban as the Sith homeworld. I mean did they piss the fans on purpose or something ?

    • @big_sexy123
      @big_sexy123 4 ปีที่แล้ว +266

      Because jj Abrams doesnt bother to do any fucking research and just makes shit up. He is one of the worst directors that has ever lived. He has zero vision in any of his movies and is a complete sell out.

    • @JoshuaKevinPerry
      @JoshuaKevinPerry 4 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      Yes. Were the first 2 films not obvious enough?

    • @PenTheMighty
      @PenTheMighty 4 ปีที่แล้ว +209

      Because anything that was created by Lucas or is a part of the expanded EU means that Disney has to pay royalties. That's the real reason they threw out the old canon. It's why C3P0 had a red arm in the first movie and the falcon looked slightly different. These weren't creative changes but financial ones. It's why we have tons of planets being introduced that are functionally the same as the originals but have different names and have been subtlety changed.
      It's always been about money. The wokeness is just an excuse for Disney to screw Lucas out of as much money as possible. It's also why they threw out everything he suggested, because he'd have to get paid for all of his ideas. It's why every director and writer got rotated out; everything they suggested was too close to Lucas-era stuff.
      Wokeness is just a political excuse for Disney being greedy fucks; and it creates an environment where those who bitch about the changes get lambasted by the media, keeping Disney's little secret under wraps. They never cared about the franchise or maintaining its integrity, because integrity would have cost them millions.

    • @markusb3712
      @markusb3712 4 ปีที่แล้ว +63

      @@PenTheMighty The odd thing tho is that through SWTCW, Korriban has been officially been made into cannon by the name of Moriban, and oddly enough Darth Bane as well. In other words, Disney is forgetting about their own cannon!

    • @dave341000
      @dave341000 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      When it came up during the film, I was like know this :D and then I was left a bit gutted when it wasn't Korriban :/

  • @Anglicanism_go_brr_JLY
    @Anglicanism_go_brr_JLY ปีที่แล้ว +61

    “Writing is hard, isn’t it JJ” is the sequel trilogy summarized in one sentence 🤣

  • @dannypalin9583
    @dannypalin9583 4 ปีที่แล้ว +165

    When I was a kid, I loved Disney. It's heartbreaking to grow up and see them as a sterile, bland, corrupt company.

    • @tysargent9647
      @tysargent9647 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      If only they could create something that would appeal to the fans of the Disney classics.

    • @wayfarerzen
      @wayfarerzen 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Disney as a company was never good or benevolent as far as I can tell. Though, certainly even moreso sterile and bland and corrupt in recent decades. What you should love are the incredible works of art its creative teams produced when given good direction, oftentimes in spite of whatever politics are going on in the higher circles. It helps to separate one from the other.

    • @30AndHatingIt
      @30AndHatingIt 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Looking back, Disney had a real bad habit of killing the parents off in their films. Seriously, tally it up.

    • @AITullball3333
      @AITullball3333 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      The Disney-family had to sell out to Jews in the 80s. That was the beginning of the end of The Walt Disney Company.

    • @death-king1834
      @death-king1834 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I pretty much only care for their animated content from Snow White to most of the stuff up to Tangled. But the company in itself represents the absolute worst of evil super power corporations. Old Walt would be spinning in his damn grave.

  • @TheRealGuywithoutaMustache
    @TheRealGuywithoutaMustache 4 ปีที่แล้ว +223

    Remember when people argued: "JJ Abrams saved Star Wars from George Lucas & The Prequels"
    Yeah no

    • @heavymetalfitness2091
      @heavymetalfitness2091 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Just Some Guy without a Mustache
      Dude I see you everywhere. Ur usually lurking around the same fitness channels I watch

    • @frankfedison5203
      @frankfedison5203 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Me neither

    • @zachkills4
      @zachkills4 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I mean Damage Control from TLJ, only 1 movie, to be fair I understand why the movie is so messy, I don't agree with alot of the film though. Somehow the Prequels were completely redeemed.

    • @BryanBoytano
      @BryanBoytano 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      satireknight weren’t that bad? what fkn drugs are u on m80

    • @briant7265
      @briant7265 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@satireknight The prequels are Shakespeare next to this latrine explosion.

  • @horseface31
    @horseface31 4 ปีที่แล้ว +254

    I have a solution to Disney's problem, they should just shoot a buttload of scenes and then release them all to the public to edit together at their will.

    • @persona83
      @persona83 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Or buy a SW construction kit. Then give it to Topher Grace.

    • @Prototheria
      @Prototheria 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I dig it. Like a choose your own adventure book, but a movie.

    • @andrewreeves1250
      @andrewreeves1250 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Matthew Schultz yeah, like when Trent Reznor released those songs on GarageBand!

    • @e.n8461
      @e.n8461 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I would just make they fly now for two hours

    • @_V.Va_
      @_V.Va_ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Like the Phantom Edit?

  • @KneelB4Bacon
    @KneelB4Bacon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +171

    _"This movie is a walking shadow. A poor player that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more. It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing"_
    That William Shatner was one smart dude.

  • @spartanwolf
    @spartanwolf 4 ปีที่แล้ว +345

    C-3PO's programing won't allow him to read the Sith dagger.
    Critical Drinker: What is this thing, the Ring of Sauron or something
    Me: No, the Ring of Sauron was useful.

    • @masterdeetectiv9520
      @masterdeetectiv9520 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Also makes no sense that reading sith code is illegal or whatever. The law has to date back to the age of the old jedi, since the new republic wouldnt have any laws like that. And neither would the empire, which would undo that law probably. And 3po was made on tatooine, a planet where republic law doesnt apply

    • @patrickspalding8045
      @patrickspalding8045 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      The old republic had no laws against being a sith. So I don’t see why there language would be illegal

    • @mrvespuccia.k.ameganite1747
      @mrvespuccia.k.ameganite1747 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      even if C-3PO couldn’t read it for some reason they could’ve just tried to find a droid who could instead of baiting the audience

  • @thorboysen3318
    @thorboysen3318 4 ปีที่แล้ว +488

    How is it possible that 30 minutes of "The Mandalorian" are more interesting and fun than almost 8 hours of the sequel trilogy???
    I don't know what Kathleen Kennedy thinks but under normal circumstances she must hate the success of "The Mandalorian"! But i think she would never admit that in public! George Lucas was a couple of times on the set of The Mandalorian! So he seems to care and like the show! Jon Favreau admitted that he took a lot of George Lucas' ideas and used them in "The Mandalorian"! I bet KK was pissed about that...!

    • @EntrEsprit
      @EntrEsprit 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      true,honestly i enjoyed and had more impressions from episode 7 of Mandalorian than the entire Rise of Skywalker movie

    • @fantasticmrnox
      @fantasticmrnox 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Doubt KK has no say whats going on with the Mandalorian otherwise we will be getting a majority of woke episodes. Which is also why the woke are pissed off with the lack of gender politics in it as theyve been crying for lack of women roles and mando isnt a women

    • @marSLaZZ66
      @marSLaZZ66 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      in french KK sounds like "caca" wich means "poo-poo"!!!💩 ...it fits her so well!
      Fuck off, film!! 😂🤣

    • @curadhanpowell5007
      @curadhanpowell5007 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Could not disagree more. Mandalorian is really good but at the end of the day it is a TV show and therefore I cannot be as good as these films because TV shows just aren’t nearly as grand in scale and we need grand scale.

    • @danielwright7710
      @danielwright7710 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      The sequel trilogy violated the core tenants of good storytelling. Not only did they need an outline drawn up of all the integral plot points of every installment with clear definable purposes of all principle characters, but they had to know what happened to the core original trilogy characters in the 30 years between Return of the Jedi and The Force Awakens, so when you introduce them back into the story once you properly introduce all the principal new characters first of course, you show how much they changed to such a drastic degree that the moviegoer wonders:"what the fuck happened to you since last I saw you!" Not only that, you have the story take place in once familiar locales, such as Coruscant or Kasykk (I know I'm spelling that wrong, it's the Wookie homeworld) and show it in a drastic new light. You want to leave the audience wondering the how and why and create tension, while slowly filling in the blank spaces. These films did none of this, in favor of nostalgia in place of good storytelling and allowing organic and believable progression without repeating the same shit over and over again.

  • @troffle
    @troffle 4 ปีที่แล้ว +307

    Rey is Palpatine's grand-daughter. Grand-daughter of the Emperor. They made Rey a Princess. A Disney Princess.

    • @Singularity2039
      @Singularity2039 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Good one! 😝👌

    • @trevor2830
      @trevor2830 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Damn that was Spot On! 👏

    • @cole0424
      @cole0424 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Now with, hindsight always being 20/20, we understand that's all they ever intended to do. Excellent comment and observation @troffle.

    • @TheCucuyo9779
      @TheCucuyo9779 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thanks.
      I hate it.

    • @williamshao1985
      @williamshao1985 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hmm... it all make sense now.

  • @frankkoenen7043
    @frankkoenen7043 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    Before Disney got there hands on it they actually “flew now” roughly 3500 years ago because the the mandalorians during the old republic even had jet pack technology

  • @hoosieryank6731
    @hoosieryank6731 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1689

    My wife laughed at me when I went to see '1917' instead of this.

    • @Budgettechbro
      @Budgettechbro 4 ปีที่แล้ว +80

      hoosieryank67 oh trust me 1927 was a way better film

    • @_V.Va_
      @_V.Va_ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +144

      Who's laughin' now?

    • @nra3zehuti781
      @nra3zehuti781 4 ปีที่แล้ว +156

      DIVORCE HER

    • @CPS2
      @CPS2 4 ปีที่แล้ว +179

      @@Budgettechbro
      Is 1927 the sequel?

    • @indycarlegion
      @indycarlegion 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      I had that same choice, and I chose wrong.

  • @justinfoidel5795
    @justinfoidel5795 4 ปีที่แล้ว +465

    J.J. Abrahams forgot about the actual sith home world:
    It’s name is Korriban

    • @pantherapardus1398
      @pantherapardus1398 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      That's just their grave planet. Dromund Kaas is the actual Sith home world.

    • @DeNamETae
      @DeNamETae 3 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      @@pantherapardus1398 actually, Kaas was only the capitol of the Sith Empire.
      Korriban was the first planet the Dark Jedi came upon after being banished into unknown space after the second schism within the Je'daii order. Korribans native population was a species called the Sith, who were very strong in the force. The Dark Jedi subjugated the planet and mixed/interbred with the Sith species, and eventually took the name 'Sith' to replace 'Je'daii/Dark Jedi'.
      With the constant wars with the Old Republic as well as infighting between the Sith Lords (well before the rule of two) the planet became barren and was then used as their tomb world.

    • @heatherphillips5983
      @heatherphillips5983 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Or they could've made it the world, of the list tribe of the sith, can't remember the name right now, but that would've been fine too.

    • @HouseOfAlastrian
      @HouseOfAlastrian 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@pantherapardus1398 Korriban is where the Sith originated, but once the Dark Side turned it into a wasteland, most of them moved to Ziost, leaving Korriban as a tomb world.
      As for Dromund Kaas, that became the Sith homeworld after Emperor Vitiate rebuilt the Sith Empire after the Great Hyperspace War.

    • @Drawnartist
      @Drawnartist 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yep

  • @ThCp__
    @ThCp__ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +154

    The better parts of the movie were those where Rey was not present. Also, when she was trying to reach the wreck of the Death Star I was expecting her to part the seas like Moses. So disappointed she didn't.

    • @blatherama
      @blatherama 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      That would have made more sense than a girl raised on a desert planet being able to sail a skiff in rough seas.

    • @ThCp__
      @ThCp__ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@blatherama true, but at this point I just take as a given that she won't have trouble doing anything ever. Except hitting the training ball at the start, which seems to be a more dangerous opponent than kylo ever was.

    • @blatherama
      @blatherama 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@ThCp__ LOL. Palpatine should have sent training balls after her rather than Sith troopers and force lightning.

    • @AlucardTheFuckMotheringVampire
      @AlucardTheFuckMotheringVampire 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Dude I thought she was gonna walk on it

    • @stephaniemitchell8509
      @stephaniemitchell8509 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@AlucardTheFuckMotheringVampire I totally expected to see her walking on the water too. My gut was clenched in anticipation for the cringe! xD

  • @annaptakova3242
    @annaptakova3242 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    "... my plot analysis..." You have my respect for being able to find anything worth the title "plot".

  • @williamarmendariz9645
    @williamarmendariz9645 4 ปีที่แล้ว +537

    There is side quests in Skyrim that have a better story than the last Jedi

    • @SeaJay_Oceans
      @SeaJay_Oceans 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      The Jedi need to hear this to save their souls: th-cam.com/video/jWq9PZ_PB-0/w-d-xo.html

    • @arenkai
      @arenkai 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      and we all know Skyrim's writing is abysmal...

    • @MrNickPresley
      @MrNickPresley 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I swear, I'm gonna force choke a bitch if I have to hear another sermon about Talos.

    • @simonfrederiksen104
      @simonfrederiksen104 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thanks, laughed hard.

    • @derekmiller2770
      @derekmiller2770 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Adrock 99 Exept maybe Blood On the Ice, that quest was almost as broken as star wars lol

  • @stunnerofagunner
    @stunnerofagunner 4 ปีที่แล้ว +667

    "They fly now?"
    *They are called jet troopers , I'm more surprised they are riding motor bikes?!..*

    • @cjjuszczak
      @cjjuszczak 4 ปีที่แล้ว +70

      yep, the good guys steal "old" hover speeders, and for some reason the police are using newer ground-based ... snowmobiles ? even though they can jet-fly faster than the snowmobiles ?

    • @chesterfumblenutts6935
      @chesterfumblenutts6935 4 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      They Roll now.

    • @TheBandit7613
      @TheBandit7613 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @@cjjuszczak Those are future toys

    • @maybelater2160
      @maybelater2160 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      I'm more surprised that they have a catapult to get off the bike. It still amuses me.

    • @singlikeyoumeanit3261
      @singlikeyoumeanit3261 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@chesterfumblenutts6935 they roll now?!

  • @Kommiekiller
    @Kommiekiller 4 ปีที่แล้ว +900

    TROS: Exo gul is the sith homeworld
    Korriban: am I a joke to you?

    • @BoredOuttaMyMind
      @BoredOuttaMyMind 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      *Korriban

    • @wol5fe
      @wol5fe 4 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      FUCKING RIGHT!?!?!?

    • @madams3110
      @madams3110 4 ปีที่แล้ว +69

      To be fair, Jar Jar Abrams doesn't even know much about Star Wars or Star Trek.

    • @MrMirageCaster
      @MrMirageCaster 4 ปีที่แล้ว +64

      It's not that Korriban is a joke. It's that all EU lore, original canon, proper storytelling, and basic principles are a joke to them.

    • @BensDumbHandle
      @BensDumbHandle 4 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      I was so angry when I heard that. Fuming, even. These movies already broke their own canon and now they're just breaking it further. Korriban was in The Clone Wars, although for some stupid reason they called it Moraband. Regardless, it was the same planet. These movies are just jokes.
      Thank god The Old Republic is still up and giving us good Star Wars stories. It's our only hope. Literally.

  • @Jaris84R
    @Jaris84R ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Palpatine: You could not live with your own failure. And where did that bring you? Back to me.

  • @regularfather4708
    @regularfather4708 4 ปีที่แล้ว +164

    I'm not sure folks truly appreciate the sacrifices you make for us.

  • @scottgun
    @scottgun 4 ปีที่แล้ว +547

    1.9k downvoters are in stage one of Star Wars Grief: Denial.

    • @Objective-Observer
      @Objective-Observer 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Well that flew over most people's heads, but I agree with you.

    • @Zentauri77
      @Zentauri77 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      the downvotes are not canon

  • @collegerebel
    @collegerebel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +701

    "It is a tale told by an idiot."
    I freakin' love that.

    • @krishnarjunar2724
      @krishnarjunar2724 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Macbeth ❤️

    • @spittinvenom9671
      @spittinvenom9671 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Full of sound and fury

    • @jamesmills1155
      @jamesmills1155 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Signifying nothing.

    • @kevls5536
      @kevls5536 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      To the last syllable of recorded time

    • @harrambou9468
      @harrambou9468 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Some people forget Shakespeare’s influence 😂

  • @noehctuccmliw
    @noehctuccmliw 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Stood in line as a kid, waiting in the rain to get a ticket to the first Star Wars movie. The next batch of movie chapters built upon it very well. I even enjoyed the Rogue One & Solo branches. Nothing is perfect (yes Jar Jar was dam irritating, however he made me laugh. He was 'that guy' somebody always brings to the party to love or hate) but they still added to a great story with expected continuity.
    Then came the final 2 shows that not only shit every bed that Hilton has to offer, but did it despite the fact they actually had to go out of their way to sewer the once traditional storyline and spit on every character that had earned their time tested golden right to stand tall and not be simply displaced by a new wave of magically entitled upstarts. Those new actors should really be embarrassed. Can't wait to see them pushed out of their own much dimmer spotlight and enjoy feeling ripped off by the babies of their future.
    A couple of 'Spaceballs' sequels would have fit better. But JJ wouldn't know much about 'balls' ...

    • @xminusone1
      @xminusone1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I can relate to that. I was 8 years old when it came out. People who waiting in line with me, were People who actually just got out of the theater and wanted to see it for the second or third time. Not all but alot of them. People went crazy with that movie. When ESB came out, it was even worse and the cinema were I was living at the time had a special run when you could see ANH and ESB for the same price, shortly after the second came out, maybe 3 or 4 weeks after. There was People who waited for that special projection. RoJ was the same thing. It was an amazing time for movies, then terminator and robocop came out, the goonies.. and they did little publicity except for the posters, so imagine something as creative and original come out today, with all the social media and people who would talk about them movies. People would need to wait for DAYS on the opening night and few weeks later. I wish the younger People could experience something like this, not with only one movie but exactly what we had, 6 or 7years straight of amazing movies like we had the chance to see when they came out.

  • @khfan4life365
    @khfan4life365 4 ปีที่แล้ว +163

    This trilogy has shat on Luke, Leia, Han, Anakin, the rest of the Jedi Order, and George Lucas. 😡

    • @ikoandreas5085
      @ikoandreas5085 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      and palpatine

    • @MrSuckeragi
      @MrSuckeragi 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      And the fans

    • @thekiller7994
      @thekiller7994 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      And my faith in Star Wars

    • @Scazoid
      @Scazoid 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@thekiller7994 I find your lack of faith justified.

    • @NathanCassidy721
      @NathanCassidy721 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      And when shitting on George Lucas is considered an insult, you know it’s bad.

  • @zaktaylor910
    @zaktaylor910 4 ปีที่แล้ว +361

    Can we all just agree that the sequel trilogy should not be considered canon simply due to how stupid they are and how they undermine the plot of Anakin

    • @JoeTECPlayZ
      @JoeTECPlayZ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      DejaVoodooDoll u gae

    • @_V.Va_
      @_V.Va_ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @DejaVoodooDoll You're gay and smell stinky.

    • @Xehanort10
      @Xehanort10 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Have it be a horrible nightmare Luke had when he fell asleep in the Jedi temple once.

    • @jkknight9209
      @jkknight9209 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @DejaVoodooDoll . . . Did your mother drop you on your head repeatedly as a child?? Oh my aching head. Are you one of those Tofu Klones whose head goes nuclear whenever someone mentions the sacrilege of disgusting, perverted things like CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT? Come to think of it, have you ever watched the original trilogy NOT shitfaced? I hear you get a lot more from it when you're not projectile vomiting and hungover . . .

    • @ninjanibba4259
      @ninjanibba4259 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yup definitely

  • @Veka550M
    @Veka550M 4 ปีที่แล้ว +558

    Disney bought a moneymaking machine and stuffed it with toilet paper and tampons.

    • @synapticflow
      @synapticflow 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      and soy milk, pink wigs and estrogen pills

    • @JohnP.Conley-gt5ce
      @JohnP.Conley-gt5ce 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      MOSTLY TAMPONS---"VAGINA WARS" IS NEXT.

    • @XiahouJoe
      @XiahouJoe 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Just said the same to my wife a minute ago they had the golden goose and butchered it to sell the meat.

    • @ryans1623
      @ryans1623 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      HAHAHAHA awesome.

    • @ryans1623
      @ryans1623 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@JohnP.Conley-gt5ce Vagina wars hahahahah awesome again

  • @happyguy5165
    @happyguy5165 2 ปีที่แล้ว +238

    As a 22 year old with ADHD, I can confirm I could have written a better script at 13 than Disney’s absolute monstrosity

    • @odajunior5373
      @odajunior5373 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      And i believe you.

    • @Styxswimmer
      @Styxswimmer ปีที่แล้ว +10

      My son is a 15 year old with ADD and he could write a better script than this BS

    • @dcmastermindfirst9418
      @dcmastermindfirst9418 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Written*

    • @happyguy5165
      @happyguy5165 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@dcmastermindfirst9418 cheers 😂

    • @Brodzzzzz
      @Brodzzzzz 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I believe you

  • @BluePhoenix_
    @BluePhoenix_ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +723

    "They fly now?"
    Says C3P0 who saw Clone troopers, Storm troopers and Storm troopers series X fly.
    Says Poe who saw Storm troopers series X fly.
    Says Finn who was a Storm trooper series X.

    • @robertfitzgerald3118
      @robertfitzgerald3118 3 ปีที่แล้ว +69

      I really don't think Abrams knows jack shit about Star Wars, but he's the creator of Felicity and alias. Nuff said...

    • @russiankodiak6849
      @russiankodiak6849 3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      And we didn’t even get one Mandalorian in this trilogy

    • @mandaloretheultimate3691
      @mandaloretheultimate3691 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      @@russiankodiak6849 that's for the best.

    • @HouseOfAlastrian
      @HouseOfAlastrian 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Jetpacks and yet not a single Mandalorian to be seen.
      Fuck off, film!

    • @insensitive919
      @insensitive919 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Calm down, it was just a joke.
      Like when somebody pees on you and tells you it's raining, except less funny.

  • @vernonmodglin5502
    @vernonmodglin5502 4 ปีที่แล้ว +473

    This whole movie is a series of scenes where the director was like, "Wouldn't it be cool if..."

    • @vvreno
      @vvreno 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      I feel like this is what happened with the last season of Game of Thrones also.

    • @Rozveree
      @Rozveree 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      what's funny is that this is literally 100% true. When JJ Abrams was hired to rewrite Colin Treverrow's script he literally made a bucket list of 'things he wanted to see in the last star wars movie' and then tried to build a narrative around random bullshit

    • @member5488
      @member5488 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      "Good guy powers up and attacked and then bad guy yells and attacked and they attacked!" level fanfic writing.

    • @ladistar
      @ladistar ปีที่แล้ว

      @@member5488 bahahahaha so true

    • @One.Zero.One101
      @One.Zero.One101 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yeah the perfect example of this is 10,000 star destroyers rising from beneath the ground:
      Audience: "Does it make sense?"
      Jar Jar Abrams: "No but it looks cool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
      That's why all these reboots and sequels make no sense, their writing philosophy is "Screw the logic, if it looks cool just put it in there".

  • @beardedbjorn5520
    @beardedbjorn5520 4 ปีที่แล้ว +254

    Why are the First Order using motorbikes, when hoverbikes are standard military issue?
    Seriously the only other wheeled vehicle in Star Wars is the Juggernaut tank in ep3. That would be so archaic in universe, where repulsorlift technology has been around for thousands of years. That would be like the U.S. Army Rangers riding a horse drawn chariot into battle.

    • @escapest
      @escapest 4 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      Riding a horse you say...? It would be as ridicolous as riding horses on a star destroyer to attack them.... wait... it happened in this piece of shit... fock off film...

    • @sourcerror
      @sourcerror 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      "Why are the First Order using motorbikes, when hoverbikes are standard military issue?" - To sell more toys. No other reason.

    • @beardedbjorn5520
      @beardedbjorn5520 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@sourcerror pretty much sums up the whole trilogy lol

    • @dancehotelzumba3177
      @dancehotelzumba3177 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      JJ got the idea from Star Trek Nemesis where Captain Picard drives a dune buggy. JJ thought, "Hey that's a great idea! I'll steal it." (Yes I know it's a stupid idea.)

    • @joshhoover6687
      @joshhoover6687 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hailfire droid and Armored Tank Droid: "Am I a joke to you?"

  • @nikkimouseclubhouse
    @nikkimouseclubhouse ปีที่แล้ว +7

    The Rise of Skywalker made me strengthen my bond and love for the prequels and original trilogy. Everything about this epic 'finale' is like a cruel, drawn out torture for everyone involved and everyone watching.

  • @robertfeldmann542
    @robertfeldmann542 4 ปีที่แล้ว +468

    the desire to see part two is stronger than the desire to see the film

    • @gordonpromish9218
      @gordonpromish9218 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      oooo that's a BINGO!

    • @chickenbonelives
      @chickenbonelives 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Indeed.

    • @wall-e7179
      @wall-e7179 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @Stesilaus 😂😂😂 It's was a popular Scottish sketch show called Chewin' the Fat. You can see episodes on TH-cam.

    • @SumDumGy
      @SumDumGy 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      There’s desire to see the film? :/

    • @Muck006
      @Muck006 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Stesilaus Somewhere in here: th-cam.com/play/PLCQa4oxkXkMORKDVUGQZzMtB_xp-3tK1F.html

  • @Goroganos
    @Goroganos 4 ปีที่แล้ว +202

    The half explained reason for Palpatine being back is cloning : "Dark secrets only the Sith knew about". i guess the entire prequels aren't canon anymore

    • @jeremyallen492
      @jeremyallen492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Apparently Disney didn't want to reference them for fear of triggering the prequel haters

    • @Goroganos
      @Goroganos 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      ​@@jeremyallen492 I'm speachless. It was so obvious it'd backfire. Plus, it's literally doing bad world building, aka doing a bad science fiction movie. Just to avoid being linked to the prequels.

    • @jeremyallen492
      @jeremyallen492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@Goroganos guess it was easier for them to take Capcom's "who gives a shit!" approach to the story than it was for them to can the sequel trilogy entirely after Last Jedi torpedoed Farce Awaken's flimsy narrative and start from scratch with people who actually knew what the hell they're doing.
      Would've taken longer but it'd have been preferable to the lowest common denominator storyline we got as closure to the forty years of storytelling and world building the Skywalker saga has under its belt

    • @HouseOfAlastrian
      @HouseOfAlastrian 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The cloning bit was done in Legends as well. And it was shit then too.

    • @samuelallard141
      @samuelallard141 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@HouseOfAlastrian the timothy trilogy did it as well, and it was the best books ive read tho

  • @laladui
    @laladui 4 ปีที่แล้ว +302

    Palpatine didn't die. It was just a clone. Can't wait for him in the next movie! x'D

    • @kylefrank638
      @kylefrank638 4 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      Being incinerated doesn't kill him. But also being incinerated kills him.

    • @voivodadracula1936
      @voivodadracula1936 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Turns out that palpatine was literally all the sith

    • @scottgrohs5940
      @scottgrohs5940 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      If Palpatine’s survived three attempts to kill him, all while engineering a redux of the Empire, at this point just let him. I’d say he’s earned it.

    • @NoName-ji9mb
      @NoName-ji9mb 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@voivodadracula1936 Always has been. 🔫👨‍🚀

  • @___Xander
    @___Xander 3 ปีที่แล้ว +87

    Original Trilogy - Beautiful, masterful, unique story telling based on past movie tropes
    Prequel Trilogy - A decent, dark, origin story to how the originals came to be
    Sequel Trilogy - kid friendly garbage with absolutely no substance and no care for past characters
    I really hope Disney learns from this mistake and avoids it in case they decide to do another trilogy, which I know they will because $$$.

    • @thefilmwatcher1302
      @thefilmwatcher1302 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Except what you describe the prequels to be is basically only what Revenge of the Sith was, because The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones sucked and are basically just kids’ movies now.

    • @MigIgg
      @MigIgg 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@thefilmwatcher1302 The first two movies have a ton of flaws but I wouldn’t consider them terrible, if anything they are just ok.

    • @OrthoLou
      @OrthoLou 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@MigIgg I've always had love for the Phantom Menace; almost a closeted lover of it back when it was cool to hate on the prequels.
      AOTC I understand the criticisms but still find it enjoyable overall.

    • @glauberglousger6643
      @glauberglousger6643 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@thefilmwatcher1302 they’re dark, they have a stringent plot, and are decent overall for prequels
      Could they have not been so... eye-rolling at times, yes
      But at least it made sense,
      And that scene in Attack of the Clones where Palpatine stands watching all the clones and Star Destroyers rise, with the Empire’s theme,
      Is glorious,
      Also loved the slow exploration of more of the galaxy, even if nowadays it seems everyone dislikes that,
      Phantom Menace had some questionable stuff, but was a great introduction to the world, with some interesting worldbuilding
      You get from those two a massive amount of information, Slave trading, Podracing, So many species, the Sith, the Jedi
      Cloning,
      So many new worlds (even if nowadays no one likes stuff that isn’t relevant or could be cut out, like Dexters diner, but that’s just people not waiting for a buildup with less patience, I think)
      Political issues and exploration
      They’re possibly some of the best stories ever told in movie/book history
      Revenge of the Sith is more memorable, but overall, had less in comparison,
      It’s only got a few brief shots of worlds, a space battle,
      But the Personal conflict of Anakin, is so wonderful, the consequences memorable,
      It’s also got the aftermath like Jedi Temple and Wookieland, but it’s nothing compared to the ending finale, quite possibly one of the greatest fights, up there
      All three are objectively superior to the originals
      Even if the dialogue is a bit clunky to hear and watch, it’s quite realistic (which is also partly why it’s clunky)
      The sequels have more than the originals, but none of it is worth anything, so it’s why they’re worse
      The new Sequals that they’re making?
      Bad, the world’s completely broken, nothing can be done to fix it without stupidity being clearly visible

    • @thefilmwatcher1302
      @thefilmwatcher1302 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@glauberglousger6643 First, not to be pedantic, but this always annoys me. It’s “sequels”, not “sequals”. Just to get that out of the way.
      Second, what makes the prequels lackluster is the presentation. The worldbuilding and story is amazing; the buildup to the original trilogy status quo is great. (Most of) The characters are really cool, and Anakin was a really good protagonist played by a talented actor. The presentation is awful tho; the dialogue isn’t just flat; it’s wooden and lifeless, making the characters feel dry with their dry deliveries. There’s no energy or special tinge to the dialogue; it’s just flat out telling you what’s going to happen in the plot before it happens.
      The pacing is also kind of bad. The first Star Wars movie-not calling it A New Hope-accomplished in getting more known to the audience about the story and the world in 20 minutes than Phantom Menace did in an hour. And Phantom Menace is the better of the first two prequels; Attack of the Clones has a lot more examples of the awkward wooden/stilted dialogue. Worldbuilding is good, but you at least need a sense of progression if your movie is as flatly presented as Phantom Menace. Which, unlike AOTC, I don’t even think is a bad movie. It’s mid; it’s perfectly mid.
      Third, realism is not an excuse for clunky dialogue. Of course, even good dialogue that is very obviously overly scripted and rehearsed can also be a chore to watch (i.e. Dragon Ball Kai, the “manga-accurate” redub of Dragon Ball Z), but the prequels’ dialogue isn’t that good until Revenge of the Sith, which fixed basically all of the problems of the other two. If the dialogue is flatly delivered and/or makes the film boring and uninteresting to watch, it’s clunky. You can’t just excuse the clunky dialogue as realistic when you need good dialogue to keep people invested in the story you’re trying to tell.
      Fourth, I’ve never called Revenge of the Sith a bad movie. To me, it’s always been fantastic.
      Fifth, yeah, the sequels’ worldbuilding sucks in TFA. Just copies of planets from the prequels and originals that we never get any further insight into. The other two movies in the sequel trilogy at least had some interesting ideas for planets and let us see them on a deeper level.

  • @torque9889
    @torque9889 4 ปีที่แล้ว +101

    I’ve just watched this, Googled how palpatine is actually back. And read 3 long ass explanations doing plot acrobatics to explain why he’s even in the story. If fans have to try that hard to explain one plot point I think that sums up this new mess of a trilogy.

    • @moxxiiscarlett7141
      @moxxiiscarlett7141 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      It essentially is supposed to come down to 'inhales'
      *Clones*

  • @jozinek876
    @jozinek876 4 ปีที่แล้ว +132

    This film honestly felt really rushed and desperate. Abrams even said that the negative reviews for this film were right. He knew what he was making sucked.
    Edit: typed "an" instead of "and", this has been corrected now.

    • @emblemblade9245
      @emblemblade9245 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Jozinek Where’d he say that? Not doubting, just curious because this is the first time I’ve heard this

    • @jozinek876
      @jozinek876 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@emblemblade9245 just Google "JJ Abrams they're right" and you'll see numerous vids and articles talking about it.

    • @emblemblade9245
      @emblemblade9245 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Ah, just read it. Honestly not a very satisfying read. He was like “the critics are right, the fans are right, you can’t please everyone” despite deliberately trying to please people who hated TLJ. What a copout

    • @juanmanuelcorrea7673
      @juanmanuelcorrea7673 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Can't blame him... Ryan Johnson ruined EVERYTHING JJ had prepared for the trilogy

    • @emblemblade9245
      @emblemblade9245 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Wasn’t his idea to write for the second film

  • @billyb1996
    @billyb1996 4 ปีที่แล้ว +539

    Horses. F'ing horses. Why not just give them all ferraris.

    • @bofthegaffe7642
      @bofthegaffe7642 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Horses... because stupid cannot be fixed

    • @sg0771
      @sg0771 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Force vs. Ferrari would be a dope spin-off

    • @warspitehms5334
      @warspitehms5334 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Or why not flying rhinos

    • @jasonezekiel3250
      @jasonezekiel3250 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      what happened to speeders? and the clone "bikes"? Ahh fuck it, we can't be fucked making props, let's just give them horses, FUCK OFF MOVIE!

    • @AquaLantern
      @AquaLantern 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@jasonezekiel3250 There was a line "Jam their speeders!" followed by "They're not using speeders!" *que horses*
      Umm, WHEN have they been able to jam speeder bikes? We've never seen that before. Not on Endor, Passana, Crait, or anywhere else where stopping speeders would have been useful. They just pull this plot-point out of their ass to justify the horses.

  • @pieguy6992
    @pieguy6992 2 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Due to the drinking challenge you proposed at the beginning of the video, I had to split my viewing of this video into three sessions spread across three weekends. My friends weren’t impressed with me getting shitfaced three weeks in a row and drunk dialing all of them countless times, but it was worth it for the review!
    Well, the parts of it that I remember, at least.

  • @wol5fe
    @wol5fe 4 ปีที่แล้ว +573

    “Take a drink every time I mention some sort of contrivance or plot hole in this movie”
    Me: gets alcohol poisoning and dies in a dumpster within the opening crawl.

    • @ShinkuGouki
      @ShinkuGouki 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      😁😁😂😂🤣🤣🤣

    • @cheesedogg805
      @cheesedogg805 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I think if you took a shot of water for every contrivance or plot hole in this movie you would still die by the end credits

    • @karateparty100
      @karateparty100 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@cheesedogg805 this is accurate since it is actually possible to die from drinking too much water

    • @akish302
      @akish302 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You know what else is dead in the dumpster with you? My hope that this film would be good.

  • @Milchi7
    @Milchi7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +290

    I just realised that if Palpatine is back the entire prophecy of Anakin destroying the Sith is completely null and void. Ye im bit slow.

    • @aurex8937
      @aurex8937 4 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      The prophecy was written by men, and men are always wrong. Didn't you get Kathleen's memo? :D

    • @death-king1834
      @death-king1834 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Well to be fair the prophecy was nothing more then a unnecessary red herring used by George to make Anakin far more important to the universe when he was some asshole in a suit in the original films who was merely a smaller part of a far larger story. But that aside these movies make Vader's sacfice and the Rebel's victory in Return of the Jedi have far less meaning now.

    • @EhurtAfy
      @EhurtAfy 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Balance to the force doesn't equate to destroying the Sith - that could have been a misinterpretation by the Jedi.

    • @donatotusi9140
      @donatotusi9140 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@EhurtAfy anakin's prophecy was not only to bring balance to the force but ALSO to destroy the sith!

    • @thel1355
      @thel1355 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      The inconsistencies with the previous movies are how we know Disney Star Wars is not canon.

  • @TheGamerZapocalypse
    @TheGamerZapocalypse 4 ปีที่แล้ว +147

    "Let the past die, kill it if you have to"...they really did just that.

    • @Captianmex1C0
      @Captianmex1C0 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      "but first bring it back if it's dead then kill it again"

  • @3_Michael_
    @3_Michael_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    Just can’t believe this whole trilogy occurred over the course of like a year since the first 2 movies were literally back to back occurring over the course of a weekend basically

  • @SilverHeist
    @SilverHeist 4 ปีที่แล้ว +414

    “Disney, you have stolen my dreams and my childhood. How dare you!” - Greta.
    #NotMyStarWars

  • @maco8799
    @maco8799 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    Thanks again CD for taking one for the team

  • @ChatBot1337
    @ChatBot1337 4 ปีที่แล้ว +284

    40 years and Palpatine won.. thanks Kathy.

    • @DeadPizza
      @DeadPizza 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      @DejaVoodooDoll kathy hired them

    • @zombiefinatic7033
      @zombiefinatic7033 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @DejaVoodooDoll Yes ""white guys"" well one of them is

    • @kevintanza6968
      @kevintanza6968 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      @DejaVoodooDoll Leave the pathetic racism and try to discuss like an adult.

    • @robdonut66
      @robdonut66 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      @DejaVoodooDoll what does that have to do with anything? So, this was not Disney and Kathleen's debacle, this was all whitey's fault?

    • @idktbh21
      @idktbh21 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      DejaVoodooDoll Why the hell do you have to emphasize that they’re white? Like you’re obviously holding some passive aggressiveness against white men.

  • @pduidesign
    @pduidesign 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I always found it funny how Palpatine told Kylo to “kill the girl” constantly in the beginning and middle and at the end he was like “I needed you alive and to come here all along”. Ughhh!!!

  • @bashkillszombies
    @bashkillszombies 4 ปีที่แล้ว +325

    This era should be henceforth known as: Teletubbie Star Wars.

    • @DarkAngelEU
      @DarkAngelEU 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      How dare you insult Po! Feel my wrath! *blows bubbles*

    • @Watcher-hh4mu
      @Watcher-hh4mu 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      The Space Balls trilogy!

    • @robertfitzgerald3118
      @robertfitzgerald3118 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Tinky winky would've been a better antagonist than kylo ren

    • @stardustskywalker7327
      @stardustskywalker7327 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      bashpr0mpt you just sent coors light up my nose..🤣

    • @ddddirge
      @ddddirge 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hey!!! that's insulting!!!
      to Teletubbies...

  • @joeyginise6051
    @joeyginise6051 4 ปีที่แล้ว +942

    Rey is not a Jedi. She resorted to anger for power. Only Sith do that.

    • @Idazmi7
      @Idazmi7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +130

      Exactly. But watch out: here comes the idiots that will say she's the "Balance" of the Force and uses both Light and Dark or some other nonsense.

    • @JOhnDoe-nl4wj
      @JOhnDoe-nl4wj 4 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      @@Idazmi7 It's in the movie you nab. She's not a Jedi, she doesn't follow the code. She's not a a sith, not following the sith code. Literally buries jedi lightsabers and pulls a yellow lightsaber (known in cannon for grey jedi aka we use the force not light or dark side).

    • @Idazmi7
      @Idazmi7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +130

      @@JOhnDoe-nl4wj
      _"It's in the movie you nab. She's not a Jedi, she doesn't follow the code. She's not a a sith, not following the sith code. Literally buries jedi lightsabers and pulls a yellow lightsaber (known in cannon for grey jedi aka we use the force not light or dark side)."_
      Don't you mean *_purple?_* Like Mace Windu's? That, and the movie never says she's using the Dark Side and directly treats her as a Jedi... because the writers are dumb.

    • @freedomfightre
      @freedomfightre 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Uhh, and Mace Windu. Do your research.
      Or hate it. I didn't write it.

    • @JOhnDoe-nl4wj
      @JOhnDoe-nl4wj 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@Idazmi7 No, green and red combined is yellow. Grey jedi don't distinguish between light and dark. Force is force for them.

  • @kmiller6500
    @kmiller6500 4 ปีที่แล้ว +103

    "Maybe they had to save on fuel costs"....oh snap. The Critical Drinker gives the Last Jedi a verbal middle finger.

  • @kenshema1174
    @kenshema1174 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    “Nahhh, it’ll be fine” is the equivalent of “super easy, barely an inconvenience” on Pitch Meeting

  • @Liberty-rn4wy
    @Liberty-rn4wy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +368

    "Writing is hard, isn't it, JJ?" 😅

    • @jeremyallen492
      @jeremyallen492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I dunno, Capcom's gotten by on writing drunken ad libs for pretty much their entire existence and people practically trip over themselves to shower money on pretty much anything THEY create.
      It's all about appealing to the lowest common denominator

    • @KaizerSozaye
      @KaizerSozaye 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Did he just say Capcom??????? 🤔🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @jeremyallen492
      @jeremyallen492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@KaizerSozaye they aren't exactly the best storytellers, buddy.

    • @KaizerSozaye
      @KaizerSozaye 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@jeremyallen492 ok and why are we comparing a video game company to a legendary cinema franchise in Star Wars??

    • @jeremyallen492
      @jeremyallen492 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@KaizerSozaye it's the irony of the matter, genius. People trash (franchise A) for screwing their storyline and then turn around and praise (franchise B) despite pulling the exact same shit as (franchise A) did

  • @mrnicktoyou
    @mrnicktoyou 4 ปีที่แล้ว +628

    Disney should give the filmmakers a budget of $50 million and tell them to make the next movie. That will force the director to concentrate on the story instead of the special effects.

    • @brennenspice6098
      @brennenspice6098 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      The issues are bigger than that

    • @napoleon4153
      @napoleon4153 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      @@brennenspice6098 some fan made short film only budget atleast 10 thousand dollars but cooler then this...

    • @FireF1y644
      @FireF1y644 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@napoleon4153 but they are shorter also. And if you want AAA quality special effetcs from ILM, famous actors etc, you already need a lot of money

    • @TaoScribble
      @TaoScribble 4 ปีที่แล้ว +72

      All the special effects and famous actors in the world can't save a crummy script and story.

    • @danfuerthgillis4483
      @danfuerthgillis4483 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      No offence these packaged vfx look like shit compared to the 1990's. The digital cameras used during the CGI sequences show impossible angles and heights which ruins the illusion.

  • @Suffering_Succotash_
    @Suffering_Succotash_ 4 ปีที่แล้ว +337

    I just want to know one thing... Do they fly now?

    • @SafetyBriefer
      @SafetyBriefer 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Axilano Den They fly now.
      /sobsincorner

    • @a.edw.160
      @a.edw.160 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      I think Disney would really appreciate it if no one would ask anymore questions, thanks

    • @spiderjeranimo4992
      @spiderjeranimo4992 4 ปีที่แล้ว +53

      "They survive the Death Star explosion now?!"
      "They survive the Death Star explosion now."

    • @jebalitabb8228
      @jebalitabb8228 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Spider Jeranimo “the dark side can lead to abilities some would consider unnatural”

    • @compookiie
      @compookiie 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      They can float around in space now

  • @patrickhenderson4926
    @patrickhenderson4926 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Thank you so much for clearly articulating what I felt so strongly. You are brilliant!

  • @oz7799
    @oz7799 4 ปีที่แล้ว +174

    "I used to think Star Wars was a tragedy, but now I realize it is a comedy."

    • @Heylon1313
      @Heylon1313 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @Maxx Kroes you wouldn't get it

    • @rowleyjefferson7254
      @rowleyjefferson7254 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Darth Gravid Ooh mooey mooey I love you!

  • @Alyek-s
    @Alyek-s 4 ปีที่แล้ว +352

    He gave it a good time if you're drunk

    • @dqreps
      @dqreps 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Luckily, i was.....

    • @RebornVengeancex
      @RebornVengeancex 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@dqrepsI think we all were...

    • @pascalhinterleitner8809
      @pascalhinterleitner8809 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      We should thank this Guy, now we dont have to wacht the Damm movie?

    • @dayvancubensis
      @dayvancubensis 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      alright, that's all I need to hear lads

    • @100Wilbur999
      @100Wilbur999 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      For real though I genuinely was drunk and it still sucked

  • @TueSorensen
    @TueSorensen 4 ปีที่แล้ว +326

    Nothing in this movie makes sense.

    • @mmrsoxnation5
      @mmrsoxnation5 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Wait you mean a sci-fi movie about laser sword weilding ninjas who have telepathic powers doesn't make sense to you? I love the uber nerds who have rules to what makes sense and what doesn't... in a sci-fi movie. This was the most enjoyable star wars movie since the originals.

    • @lordvader2599
      @lordvader2599 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      MM Dizzle Speak for yourself. This movie was the biggest turd. Absolute garbage as well as the other movies Disney has had their hands on.

    • @user-lq2nu6cn7y
      @user-lq2nu6cn7y 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      @@mmrsoxnation5 Being a sci fi/fantasy does mean they can be creative with the world they build, but it doesn't mean that it can ignore their own continuity. Being realistic and being believable is different.

    • @augustoluis6888
      @augustoluis6888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@mmrsoxnation5 How did you manage to destroy your public image before the internet?

    • @LeBronJames-StatPadderMan
      @LeBronJames-StatPadderMan 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@mmrsoxnation5 Someone is salty that their trash movie is getting flamed lmao.

  • @logicaldude3611
    @logicaldude3611 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    "She trains now?"
    "SHE TRAINS NOW!"

  • @LouiseKernow2024
    @LouiseKernow2024 4 ปีที่แล้ว +94

    The whole series of films looked like Disney's machinery for killing off all the old characters...

    • @augakem
      @augakem 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      And leaving several of them tisee theur friends around themselves die.

  • @Martiandawn
    @Martiandawn 4 ปีที่แล้ว +115

    In the scene where Rey jumps over Kylo’s TIE fighter, is there a reason he is flying a spacecraft at the speed of a family sedan?

    • @uncletimo6059
      @uncletimo6059 4 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      so she can jump over and show the patriarchy who's the boss

    • @uncletimo6059
      @uncletimo6059 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      so she can jump over and show the patriarchy who's the boss

    • @uncletimo6059
      @uncletimo6059 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      so she can jump over and show the patriarchy who's the boss

    • @uncletimo6059
      @uncletimo6059 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      so she can jump over and show the patriarchy who's the boss

    • @kimrasmussen7188
      @kimrasmussen7188 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @Dog House he is the bad guy, so he actually LIKES sand...because it is coarse and irritating...

  • @dandewizzle2479
    @dandewizzle2479 4 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    The best way I could describe this plot: "pinball machine". Bouncing around from one thing to the other, not really accomplishing anything, but making a shit-ton of noise and flashiness along the way

  • @slyaspie4934
    @slyaspie4934 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    "writing is hard isn't it JJ"🤣🤣🤣😂 "oh yes, I can definitely smell shite"

  • @Crick1952
    @Crick1952 4 ปีที่แล้ว +685

    The Sith homeworld is "Exogul" and not Korriban, thus contradicting not only the old EU, which is bad enough, but also the Clone Wars tv show.
    Aight, Imma head out

    • @johnnytopgun6414
      @johnnytopgun6414 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Ehhh I'm not too fussed with this point. Sith birthplace vs sith deathplace.

    • @elvvlogs1261
      @elvvlogs1261 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Crick1952 this was different from Korriban. Korriban is more widely known as the “home world of the Sith.” Exogul is a secret home world located in the outer unknown regions

    • @vietcongwarlord6931
      @vietcongwarlord6931 4 ปีที่แล้ว +113

      @Silverknight171 Do you really think that damn you are an idiot

    • @herpderp7264
      @herpderp7264 4 ปีที่แล้ว +77

      But Kennedy said smugly they didn't need the old lore anymore.
      What a train wreck that woman is.

    • @vietcongwarlord6931
      @vietcongwarlord6931 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@herpderp7264 She was talking about the EU not the new canon

  • @ShadQuakeFix
    @ShadQuakeFix 4 ปีที่แล้ว +337

    Nothin like destroying an entire franchise

    • @Christrulesall2
      @Christrulesall2 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Fuck off disney!!

    • @JesusFriedChrist
      @JesusFriedChrist 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Progressivism Poisons Everything

    • @Gunnar001
      @Gunnar001 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      th-cam.com/video/PEIOtI1NMQc/w-d-xo.html

    • @claude-alexandretrudeau1830
      @claude-alexandretrudeau1830 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      So, they spent 5 billion dollars just to watch it burn.

    • @orsondorange5413
      @orsondorange5413 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The last Jedi destroyed the original trilogy and this movie finished it off

  • @MrJay197409
    @MrJay197409 4 ปีที่แล้ว +184

    The Rise of Mary Sue.

    • @timkunk3498
      @timkunk3498 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      No the fall of mary suuuuuuuE suuuuuuE pig, pig, pig.