I started from scratch one month after my 50th birthday. After 20 years in a toxic marriage, I left with my suitcase, a mattress, no job and my children's pictures. Without God I would have been in a psych ward
I got out of a bad marriage, I was laid off of my part job with five kids. Peace of mind is everything, for myself and for the kids. I got married at sixteen, it was not a good marriage. Thank God, I able to get out with my life.
@@sukma-uc2mzyou may need to start in a entry level position and if you lack work history then you can express the skills and experience you have received while being a house wife/mother. Because you know how to run a home so you do have skills that will benefit their company or workplace ❤
Just divorced my 7 years of husband. I finally going to college at 34, with 2 children. But I am at peace and finally loving the woman I am becoming without the title.
Sounds just like me. On my second year of studying, separated with 3 kids. I’ve never been at soo much peace, harmony, self love on 💯 and giving my babies more attention and love, rather than the stressed out overthinking, overwhelmed mum I was whilst married. Best decision I made!
I have listened to you for years I’m 53 and newly divorced. And in some weird way I feel like I’m gonna be better now than I ever have been. Thank you for everything you’ve done to help me get here.🥰we got this
I ended my 24-year relationship with my partner, during which we raised two wonderful children, now 20 and 12. The breakup was very painful, and he made it extremely challenging for us, including speaking badly about me to our families. It's been three years, and he still harbors a lot of resentment towards me. Although I sometimes feel guilty for leaving, I also experience a sense of peace and independence each morning. Right now, I'm focusing on myself and not dating, as I'm safeguarding this newfound sense of self.
Glad you left. This sounds like my ex he talked behind my back to my family members to my children started a smear campaign. Narcissist don’t like to lose, especially to a woman.
The timing of this is impeccable. Went away for a week and came back. No welcome back, no flowers not even a hug. Just “hey” That was the last straw for me. I deserve to be loved and cared for properly. People stay in things out of familiarity. I don’t want this to be my normal. Not anymore.
@@lira2414as hard as that was for you to see. Maybe it was meant to happen so you could see who he really is and how you deserve better. Sending you healing vibes girl ❤️🩹
@@lira2414 And the woman he was walking out knew he was a married man and went ahead to sleep with your husband and it is all your husband's fault. A fellow women helping to destroy your marriage another woman's marriage and it is all men's fault.
When people say "You're going to die alone " as if death is predictable. Most patients die in the hospital between the hours of 1am to 6am in their bed, alone. The nurses finds them while doing rounds. That's why they call it " the grave yard shift" We came into this world without an audience and we are suppose to leave without one. The important thing is to have loved ones who gives the funeral.
“Do you really believe that a God that loves you would want you to be treated this way?” That is a mic-drop moment! (9:57) I love this! Powerful experiences and messages from this amazing lady! ❤
. might be true. In my case though my state is not even common law so after living together for 19 yrs and our kids being teens I feel I can take the risk. He literally gets to just be like ok bye. I was a sahm mom too and he's cut me off financially since I decided to leave to travel this summer. I've been loyal but it's like wow I've spent 40 years and had 1 partner so he can think one thing bit it's not like I'm looking to go hoe it out. I just reached 40 & I realize now that I'm not dead & a man doesn't just get to control me.
I left with my kids clothes. The benefits were 100% my peace. There's no money. And still no money ie: child support. And the state of Wisconsin protects him - not the children.
@eileenwatt8283 Exactly. And a lot of women get thrown into poverty after a divorce because usually, men earn more, and many women give up their careers to take care of their children. She deserves to be compensated for her sacrifices and pain and suffering.
The no plan b thing hit because my husband always uses the example of the general who burned all the ships and told his crew you win or die. I’m not dying for you no more!!!!
Don’t laugh ladies. 🤦🏽♀️ I was watching frozen 2 , the song secret siren forced me to admit to myself that I hated my unhealthy marriage and wanted out. I left with my three young children Divorced and free now. It was the Best decision ever. I was so drained. Thanks Elsa 🤣🤣❤️
❤Not laughing. Your testimony is powerful 🙌. I can relate, I listened to Sedated by Lizzy The Blessed and I knew it was time for change; have been divorced for 3 years now. ❤
Oh, I love that... just goes to show that inspiration and guidance can come from anywhere! And well done you for listening! 🙌 Wishing you all the very best for a wonderful life ahead 💕
Thank you Patrice. I’m in Australia 63 yo and just about separate/ divorce after 42 years Married. Met when I was 16. I have taken so many notes from you talk today and will watch it all again. Married to a vulnerable narcissist and as a positive spirit I’ve bend myself backwards to make “It” work. I have 3 wonderful adult daughters who are my mates and 6 grandchildren. They will enjoy having a happy Nana!
Thank God I saw many marriages as a child and saw the future and rejected men proposal in my 20s. I didn't want to end up where you are. I had to full fill my dreams and I have. I am happily single and loving it.
I’m a fellow Aussie cheering you on. My single life is brimming with fulfilling work, interesting learning, and fascinating interests. I work hard and love my life. Be your own protector. All the very best for your bright future.
At 63, that took real bravery! Thank you for sharing as I am your age and about to do the same. I’m terrified, but can’t seem to be ok with staying after all I’ve endured (especially now that kids are grown & all moved out). So really appreciate hearing your perspective. ✌🏾
@@bonnieroyster4482 It’s been 3 weeks now living with my daughter while my Modular house is being built. My 3 grown daughters are very supportive and say they are proud of me being so brave. My husband is living with youngest daughter until house bought. As appearances went we were a happy family. ( coercive control beneath the surface). My way of communicating my future wishes were be a long letter as relationship strained and he refused counselling( all my fault of course) I enlisted a divorcé lawyer in January to do a formal separation. Final signatures to divide everything evenly this week.
That's beautiful Sue, thank you for sharing your strength and love for yourself. I understand having experienced and left a vulnerable narcissist ex myself. Sounds like you have a special family and a wonderful life to live with them and your grandkids. Wishing you the very best future.
This is the 9th year in my marriage, and i just filed for a divorce. My mum is disappointed that it's ended and she said what if he changeds for the better. He beat m, and you say that i should not divorc. otherwise, your enemies will laugh at you. My da is saying a pastor told hi that if i divorc, i will die. At this poin, there is only one person i have on my side and no one else but am not giving up even if i have to lose everyone except my kids. The thought of my divorce alone gave me freedom. when he enters the house, my heart skips. Am starting my life all over again
You will live a LONG, PROSPEROUS LIFE! Receive it! That pastor doesn’t know what he’s talking about! I feel the same when my ex is around… my heart skips and anxiety is very high … it’s not a nice feeling 😢
I woke up and it’s 3am CST for me. I started following Patricia Washington after doing one of her financial challenges in 2015. Why was I taking the financial challenge? Because I needed to get out of a marriage that dishonored, disrespected, and dismissed me. I was 40 years old then and 9 years later I’m still in this marriage “working on my finances” to get out of this marriage. I refuse to be 50 and still here. Thank you once again Patricia. This is it.
Just starting this podcast and already knowing this will home. Its true, marriage and realtionship only benefits men, since we make our own money. I'm sick of mothering a grown up man... currently saving enough to get my place, furniture, security deposit, truck to take my stuff with me and than start over...
Beautiful !!!! I'm doing this in my fifties. I should've done this in my forties...❤😉 She speaks the truth in so many ways. I can relate 1000% I hope more women get the courage to stand up and walk out for their happiness ... its not a loss, its the biggest gain , for yourself ❤
Wow! Sounds like my life! God showed me a way out of my "Christian" marriage. He provided a way out and I took it... divorce. Finally, I just wanted to follow Jesus and I didn't care what people might say about me. I have been freed. People always act like I should be so sad because of divorce and my response is: I'm better now. I spent many years making myself small, crying, suffering emotional abuse, being told his affair and porn use were my fault...so after 18 years of marriage I was done. People say that I seem so much happier now...and I am! My kids are better now too, they get time away from their narcissistic father. Great guest!!!❤ Thank you for exposing the lies The Church has used to hurt so many women. I will be sharing your book and story.😊
I agree with you. Sometimes women marry because of our parent's relationships and the church stating that marriage is the covenant of God which marriage is but the church lacks the teaching of how to be a wife as well as a woman. Woman feel that a marriage defines who they are but God's wants couples that marry one another because they align with one another instead of marrying because of attraction. Love in a marriage is dieing oneself daily not abusive behavior.❤
It took me many years into adulthood to finally realise that perhaps marriage doesn't really benefit women. It only benefits MEN...it keep them safe, sane, with a sense of belonging while controlling the women they married controlled and weaponside on fantacy of what is like to me somebody's MRS.
Now this is power! Married for 14 years and my ex walked away but there was a lot of warning signs and the last 7 years were miserable! So glad to be free.
I pray for all of us to have a spirit of discernment. Its sad that most people stay in unhealthy relationships and waste more years but essentially nothing is lost in learning lessons but why waste more time by staying when you have confirmation from God. ❤
I’m doing this in my late 60’s , what doesn’t serve me is my marriage it is time to go, agree. Time to love again and live now ! It becomes very clear that it was not serving my well being. Amen I get to be loved as I want to be. Always plan B !
I'm really receiving the message here. I'm going through a terrible time in my relationship and have no idea what's next or where to start. I've been doing a lot self reflecting and I will say that I am beginning to find my voice and not allowing my husband to have control over my thoughts, opinions, and beliefs. The part when it was you have to start with one step before you get to the otherside is resonating with me right now. I'm a huge thinker and over thinker but I'm very much trying to learn to take action if I want to get to the otherside.
OMG - Her storyline is so similar to mines! Thank you for this interview. I could literally cry - not tears of sadness, but tears of joy and gratitude for more clarity.
Lao Tzu said "Be like water", meaning we need to be flexible and yield to the flow of life. We learn too late that life often presents us with Plan As, Bs, Cs, Ds, all the way to Z, and beyond😪 Congratulations on listening to your soul and following your heart's desire❤
Yes! My main drive for wanting to leave is to show my daughter what not to accept … kids are smart and peep everything without parents arguing and all. Energy doesn’t lie.
40 where??? This woman looks like she's in her early 20's! I love how she decided to choose herself first! So many women out there stay in the mess afraid of what other people will say!
I was you too, never speaking up, not voicing my opinions, just accepting everything as it was. The first time I questioned my ex-husband of 31 years he discarded me with a thud, crash and a bang (as said by Andrew from Narc Daily.) I admire your strength, autonomy, beauty and believing in yourself. Young women need to hear your story. Thank you for sharing!!❤
Love this ❤ I left husband of 28 years at 58 years old. I’m now 60 and still trying get divorce finalized. But this video confirms why I left. Thank you ❤❤❤
Gosh, you spoke to me. Ive been so scared of losing someone i thought was the love of my life. I had all the what if's. I prayed, fasted, begged them to love me the way i loved them. Respect me the way i did them. I bent backwards so as to keep the relationship work. Nothing happened. Been walking on eggshells to a point that now, just the sound of my phone ringing shakes me up. I've become a shadow of myself just so they see my worth. You sharing your story has just woken me up from that slumber. I pray that God gives me the will to let go and let him do his will in my life. It hurts so bad but i guess, ill get over it as time goes by. Step number 1, ive blocked communication midway as i watch this. I need to find myself again. Thank you for sharing your story.
30:16 I resonate with this so much!! I’ve been working this muscle the past couple of years myself. I had a similar situation with my daughter. We went out to eat and the dish came out with excessive peas- i don’t like peas. 😂 They weren’t named in the dish on the menu, but here they were. I didn’t want to make any waves or appear difficult so I planned to just move them to the side. My daughter said “umm excuse me…can they take off the peas? Mom, you don’t even like peas. She doesn’t like peas.” 😂😂 It was such a small thing, but watching my own daughter exercise her voice on my behalf was empowering. ❤❤❤
Trying to date at 40 is so hard. To have standards at 40 means pretty much being alone. It’s still worth the peace. I was alone before as well. Men are so disappointing - they want everything for nothing, mostly.
I have watched this video almost every day for 2 weeks cause it is so validating and empowering to me. I’m in the thick of all Of this and this has given me So much comfort. Thank you!
One thing I really appreciate about Lisa, she goes straight in with the key questions. Love that! You pack so much into interviews but in such a natural progression and give your guest time and space to tell their story.
I have been living my most peaceful life post-divorce after 17 years of marriage. God is continuing to restore all that was taken from me. I’m truly an overcomer!🙌🏾 Patrice,thank you so much for your authenticity, you are a blessing. Thank you Lisa!🫶🏾
I’m listening through tears. Your message is aiding in my healing. 61 and divorced for 3 years. The church turned away from me ( Not God). And I’m struggling to reinvent myself yet I am confident that God is near and I will prevail. Awesome testimony and so encouraging. ❣️❣️😔Thank you!
I’m only 16 min into this where the guest is sharing about all the extravagant gifts that she received and how people were telling her that at least she’s getting that. It may be too personal but I do hope she shares some of the things that he did so we can understand the real costs, the trade that she was making. One of the main concerns I have with this younger generation of ladies is that they’re really buying into this “as long as he’s a provider” mentality but sometimes the cost is way too high. It’s better to have self worth, dignity and respect for yourself than to put yourself in a position where someone knows they can buy your acceptance. I’m glad she got out.
Yes to all of this! I have always been skeptical of the (what I like to call) 'adult baby' or 'prostitute mentality' that is being pushed by these 'secure the bag' and 'get money at any cost' women pushing this subjugated materialism as 'feminism'. I am a homeowner and 4B woman (no dating, no kids, no xes, no marriage). I would not trade this freedom for anything.
Shes told the story elsewhere and from my understanding, he didnt really do anything tragic. And in my opinion, nothing to warrant divorce. She felt unfulfilled. And Im sorry, America and its tragic divorce record…destroying a covenant that you made with God and your spouse over “no longer feeling fulfilled” is insane. Thats something that is reparable with time and effort.
With youth there is optimism and hope. Men’s words hold space in your mind even if their actions contradict it. By the time you have life experiences and mature you realise that looking at facts will serve you better. People are who they are, not who you imagine they could be.
So many people just don’t want to let go because of how long they stay on their relationship ( to not say SUFFERINGSHIPS). But sometimes the decision you don’t want to make can be the best blessing for a fulfilling life. Thank you Lisa for bringing this heartbreaking topic, because I believe that many wish they can stay on their marriages.
Thank you for this episode. This is definitely my story. I divorced my husband because he did not respect the person I was. And I realize I deserve better. I learned to love myself first and I’m having a time of my life right now enjoying life with my family my children, my grandchildren. I feel truly blessed.
I just had the greatest epiphany at about the 19 minute mark, Lisa! I am a high-achieving woman that is overconfident in this terrible relationship. Amen! I thank God you girls shone that light for me. It all makes sense now. You just saved me! Thank you so much for giving me the tools to remain a badass woman 🫶
I turned 40 in may, got on a plane and i jave not been back. It was not planned but yet here i am still on the road and everythinvs aligning. I said a similar thing, i am allowed to live for myself. So i am doing the thing but its not without repercussions. Others may wanna hold me back but i will not do that to myself.
Watching this after separation... I got married at 24 and immediately I stated noticing red flags... I attempted to leave 1st week after wedding but fear of the unknown... I was convinced to stay and support my husband... I wasted 5good years.... Until I felt no, am gonna die ... And I quit the marriage at 29yrs . Rebuilding my life now... I joined nursing school and on my 2nd year...dear woman... Listen to your guts... Your intuition, if you feel something is wrong, it surely is..
I am not being valued by my mother or daughter. My whole family basically. I love beautiful things and I always was kind of judge by it. I kept of hoping that my mother or daughter would change but they dont. Now I know its not about them but about me! In my heart I feel like breaking all contact with them. The thought by that make me even happy! Cuz I feel I am attached to them to finally change. But I am willing to loose the attachment with them for me to pursue my life and surround myself to people who really appriciate me for me!❤
Her story is my story!! 🙌🏾🙌🏾. My final settlement agreement hit my inbox this morning and my heart sank but as soon as I opened TH-cam and this episode was the 1st one AND validated every single choice I made! Thank you for this!
I am in tears. God is so good thank you so much. You don’t know how much you have helped me get them signs reassurance prayers answered like thank you. I wish you the best and you’re gonna impact so many peoples lives. God is good all the time.
Your daughter is right ❤ People are not mind-readers. Communication is key! I relationships women need to tell their men what they want. Sometimes men are good men but their women also lack communication. It goes both ways!
There are men who don't have introspective on their behaviors. Men measure being a husband with how well they provide material things. It's all about " symbols". People's behavior are traits that they cannot change and if those traits are disturbing to the other person it's not a compatible or complementary marriage. It serves only one person. Communication cannot change anyone's traits it in their DNA.
Yes. Speaking nothing but the truth. When it’s time to let it go, there is nothing no one can do or say to make you stay. I knew it was my time when I felt like I was the only one invested and pouring my all into the relationship.
I am so blessed to have come across this video Lisa. The things that stood out for me were losing all these beliefs society has that you have to be married, need two parents to raise fantastic children..even though it might be true but then you can’t be caught up in such a marriage because you might lose yourself. And Yes, chains break, strongholds breaks because you have a voice! This is for me because I am currently separated from my husband, with our 3 kids.
Wow. My experience is quite different. All the women in my family were/are married. It is the reason why I wasn’t in a rush because I knew from their situations that everything that glitters isn’t gold. Best wishes to her!
Oh my word!!! I can relate moment by moment to your journey 🙌 right down to the length of marriage, my “idea” of married life, choosing me, my dream man list, online dating to “learn” my dream man list, what I will and will not accept……after 3 months we locked in after meeting online and together still after 1.5 years! Thank you so much for sharing- I didn’t realize just how far I’ve come 🙏🏻 💪 🔥 ❤
Thank you for changing my life, thank you for sharing your story because I feel so much power within myself to live for myself and not feel guilty from walking away from a relationship that is draining me emotionally. I have stayed in a relationship for 10years because I didn't want my kids to grow up without a father because I didn't know my father.
This conversation is EVERYTHING! So much juice and GOLD NUGGETS!! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!! I've cried, I've laughed and I've learned soooo much! Thank you! thank you! Thank you! xx
The most impactful talk i have listened to in a long while....i never listen to long podcasts i just forward or get tired at some point but i listened to this from beginning to end. Thanks for this it was very inspiring for me❤
This resonates with me and my story so very well. I was in a 17 year relationship and got divorced in 2023 when I finally mustered the courage to leave. Thank you for sharing your story ❤
Wow. Patrice is such an inspiration. ❤ Thank you for having her on the show. Hopefully she will return to share with us in the future. ❤ I am going to find her YT now. I particularly loved the “what is” parts. This is something I can add to my current practices to find clarity.
Omg!! Coach Patrice!! I got conviction and confirmation at the same time! I'm an alumni of P2P and Command the Stage around the same time you were making your transition. I'm so glad you chose you! ❤
I am so blessed to have come across this video Lisa. The things that stood out for me were losing all these beliefs society has that you have to be married, need two parents to raise fantastic children..even though it might be true but then you can’t be caught up in such a marriage because you might lose yourself
Jesus, hear my prayers. I’m holding on to my faith, as a single parent things are hard on me both of my sons are special needs and I’m constantly struggling to provide the basic necessities for them. I’m so ashamed. God hear my prayers. Every month I constantly struggle to pay my bills and struggle to provide groceries for my children. BUT I KEEP FAITH that’s all I have.
I’m almost 40 on December 1 and I am at the point where I need to face reality of ripping off the bandaid and file these papers. I understand that I made a mistake and instead of living in the nightmare I need to let go. I wish no ill will for my husband I just understand that our season is done. I will live with no regrets just new beginnings
My family tried to push me around as the last daughter and I decided to speak up and I was frank about my stands of pursing my dreams and all my visions God showed me and it was a saga that lasted days but I felt super good for being so vocal and sincere
I just want to say how grateful I am for the platforms women now have to talk about our cares and concerns and be HEARD. This is saving my life. I'm Zimbabwean. At 46 and married for 21 years I knew very early in the marriage that I needed to leave but it was and still is against church culture and societal norms here. I have been so afraid to leave because I worry about finances and how I will survive on my own here. He is the breadwinner and I have been a stay at home Mom and housewife throughout the marriage. There are no assets to dissolve, there will be no financial renumeration. When you mention such a thing as divorce many will discourage it, you see that they worry about you becoming a burden when you need help starting a new life without home or finance. So I am gathering the courage to do this on my own, somehow, in this year 2025. I believe that life experience, maturity and a determined mindset is going to help me to find my way forward. Please let us continue to pray for and support one another ladies. I love you all. God bless your channel Lisa. From Zimbabwe.
Excellent guest, and conversation Lisa you are an amazing host and interviewer. The group of 40+ women I have that are contemplating divorce is growing and I’m so glad you did this video, even though you’re in a satisfied marriage.
Wow! This is confirming for sure! As I watch and listen to your story I know without doubt this is the goodness of God to help free people from prisons that they thought they had to stay in.
Thank you! What an amazing interview! It made go deeper into some hard questions ....which I would have not dared to ask myself until recently....should I go on holiday with the same lovely and hostile amongst other things family and have once again anxiety and regret?
WARNING: I will never ask for your contact info in the comments section, that is someone impersonating me!
Who's this lady❤
@@torahbanksBC
@@torahbanksBCI don't believe she's famous but just a woman with a message.
Ptotpyu 22:47 22:47 o
O😢
I started from scratch one month after my 50th birthday. After 20 years in a toxic marriage, I left with my suitcase, a mattress, no job and my children's pictures.
Without God I would have been in a psych ward
curious how you start for job? do you need a lot of resources to get job? btw Im from Bali
I got out of a bad marriage, I was laid off of my part job with five kids. Peace of mind is everything, for myself and for the kids. I got married at sixteen, it was not a good marriage. Thank God, I able to get out with my life.
I believe you have all you need to begin again, and dream again. ❤🙏🏽
@@sukma-uc2mzyou may need to start in a entry level position and if you lack work history then you can express the skills and experience you have received while being a house wife/mother. Because you know how to run a home so you do have skills that will benefit their company or workplace ❤
I hope you find safety and every kind of security, including financial security.
Just divorced my 7 years of husband. I finally going to college at 34, with 2 children. But I am at peace and finally loving the woman I am becoming without the title.
Amen❤
Amen, you can do it and the best is yet to come❤
Sounds just like me. On my second year of studying, separated with 3 kids. I’ve never been at soo much peace, harmony, self love on 💯 and giving my babies more attention and love, rather than the stressed out overthinking, overwhelmed mum I was whilst married. Best decision I made!
❤
Me married 7 years and trying to figure out what to do...with a narcissistic person
I have listened to you for years I’m 53 and newly divorced. And in some weird way I feel like I’m gonna be better now than I ever have been. Thank you for everything you’ve done to help me get here.🥰we got this
Sis, you already are better👏🏾As we say is South Africa, STRONGS💪🏾
Woow, ... I'm 53 too and I've been in an extremely abusive marriage and scheming my way out. This is quite encouraging.
You definitely will be!❤
you're beautiful!
@@ViralNatureVibesI would love to hear his side of the story.
I ended my 24-year relationship with my partner, during which we raised two wonderful children, now 20 and 12. The breakup was very painful, and he made it extremely challenging for us, including speaking badly about me to our families. It's been three years, and he still harbors a lot of resentment towards me. Although I sometimes feel guilty for leaving, I also experience a sense of peace and independence each morning. Right now, I'm focusing on myself and not dating, as I'm safeguarding this newfound sense of self.
Glad you left. This sounds like my ex he talked behind my back to my family members to my children started a smear campaign. Narcissist don’t like to lose, especially to a woman.
Same
@@bcbro142u should hear the stuff this idiot told police and his lawyer and ofc his flying monkeys
Keep going..it Only Gets Better ❤❤❤
The timing of this is impeccable. Went away for a week and came back. No welcome back, no flowers not even a hug. Just “hey” That was the last straw for me. I deserve to be loved and cared for properly. People stay in things out of familiarity. I don’t want this to be my normal. Not anymore.
I went away for 6 days to visit my mom and my flight was delayed so I got home at 3am and boom he was walking out a woman from his apartment.😢
@@lira2414 Ooh no! I’m sorry that happened.
@@lira2414as hard as that was for you to see. Maybe it was meant to happen so you could see who he really is and how you deserve better. Sending you healing vibes girl ❤️🩹
@@AA-kq2rp Thank you ❤️
@@lira2414 And the woman he was walking out knew he was a married man and went ahead to sleep with your husband and it is all your husband's fault. A fellow women helping to destroy your marriage another woman's marriage and it is all men's fault.
When people say "You're going to die alone " as if death is predictable.
Most patients die in the hospital between the hours of 1am to 6am in their bed, alone. The nurses finds them while doing rounds. That's why they call it " the grave yard shift"
We came into this world without an audience and we are suppose to leave without one.
The important thing is to have loved ones who gives the funeral.
thank you
Teach!
Some people don’t have family for that either
“Do you really believe that a God that loves you would want you to be treated this way?” That is a mic-drop moment! (9:57) I love this! Powerful experiences and messages from this amazing lady! ❤
I heard someone “Usually marriage benefits men, but divorce usually benefits women.”
. might be true. In my case though my state is not even common law so after living together for 19 yrs and our kids being teens I feel I can take the risk. He literally gets to just be like ok bye. I was a sahm mom too and he's cut me off financially since I decided to leave to travel this summer. I've been loyal but it's like wow I've spent 40 years and had 1 partner so he can think one thing bit it's not like I'm looking to go hoe it out. I just reached 40 & I realize now that I'm not dead & a man doesn't just get to control me.
I left with my kids clothes. The benefits were 100% my peace. There's no money. And still no money ie: child support. And the state of Wisconsin protects him - not the children.
The woman is paid for the abuse they endured.
Women don't leave good marriages.
Say bitter controlling men
@eileenwatt8283 Exactly. And a lot of women get thrown into poverty after a divorce because usually, men earn more, and many women give up their careers to take care of their children. She deserves to be compensated for her sacrifices and pain and suffering.
The no plan b thing hit because my husband always uses the example of the general who burned all the ships and told his crew you win or die. I’m not dying for you no more!!!!
Don’t laugh ladies. 🤦🏽♀️ I was watching frozen 2 , the song secret siren forced me to admit to myself that I hated my unhealthy marriage and wanted out. I left with my three young children Divorced and free now. It was the Best decision ever. I was so drained. Thanks Elsa 🤣🤣❤️
❤Not laughing. Your testimony is powerful 🙌.
I can relate, I listened to Sedated by Lizzy The Blessed and I knew it was time for change; have been divorced for 3 years now. ❤
We all need something to make us "snap" out of it.
🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾
Same!! 😅 Me and my 3 young children went “into the unknown” ! It was difficult but necessary 😭🙌🏾
Oh, I love that... just goes to show that inspiration and guidance can come from anywhere! And well done you for listening! 🙌 Wishing you all the very best for a wonderful life ahead 💕
Thank you Patrice. I’m in Australia 63 yo and just about separate/ divorce after 42 years Married. Met when I was 16.
I have taken so many notes from you talk today and will watch it all again. Married to a vulnerable narcissist and as a positive spirit I’ve bend myself backwards to make “It” work.
I have 3 wonderful adult daughters who are my mates and 6 grandchildren. They will enjoy having a happy Nana!
Thank God I saw many marriages as a child and saw the future and rejected men proposal in my 20s. I didn't want to end up where you are.
I had to full fill my dreams and I have.
I am happily single and loving it.
I’m a fellow Aussie cheering you on. My single life is brimming with fulfilling work, interesting learning, and fascinating interests. I work hard and love my life. Be your own protector. All the very best for your bright future.
At 63, that took real bravery! Thank you for sharing as I am your age and about to do the same. I’m terrified, but can’t seem to be ok with staying after all I’ve endured (especially now that kids are grown & all moved out). So really appreciate hearing your perspective. ✌🏾
@@bonnieroyster4482
It’s been 3 weeks now living with my daughter while my Modular house is being built. My 3 grown daughters are very supportive and say they are proud of me being so brave. My husband is living with youngest daughter until house bought. As appearances went we were a happy family. ( coercive control beneath the surface). My way of communicating my future wishes were be a long letter as relationship strained and he refused counselling( all my fault of course)
I enlisted a divorcé lawyer in January to do a formal separation. Final signatures to divide everything evenly this week.
That's beautiful Sue, thank you for sharing your strength and love for yourself. I understand having experienced and left a vulnerable narcissist ex myself. Sounds like you have a special family and a wonderful life to live with them and your grandkids. Wishing you the very best future.
This is the 9th year in my marriage, and i just filed for a divorce. My mum is disappointed that it's ended and she said what if he changeds for the better. He beat m, and you say that i should not divorc. otherwise, your enemies will laugh at you.
My da is saying a pastor told hi that if i divorc, i will die. At this poin, there is only one person i have on my side and no one else but am not giving up even if i have to lose everyone except my kids.
The thought of my divorce alone gave me freedom. when he enters the house, my heart skips.
Am starting my life all over again
You will NOT die but live and declare the works of The LORD !
No need to live on eggshells. Peace of mind is everything.
Cling to the Lord....you can start again🙏🙏🙏
@@gabrielnadia1085 Psalm 118:18 Amen 🙌❤️
You will live a LONG, PROSPEROUS LIFE! Receive it! That pastor doesn’t know what he’s talking about! I feel the same when my ex is around… my heart skips and anxiety is very high … it’s not a nice feeling 😢
I woke up and it’s 3am CST for me. I started following Patricia Washington after doing one of her financial challenges in 2015. Why was I taking the financial challenge? Because I needed to get out of a marriage that dishonored, disrespected, and dismissed me. I was 40 years old then and 9 years later I’m still in this marriage “working on my finances” to get out of this marriage. I refuse to be 50 and still here. Thank you once again Patricia. This is it.
Just starting this podcast and already knowing this will home. Its true, marriage and realtionship only benefits men, since we make our own money. I'm sick of mothering a grown up man... currently saving enough to get my place, furniture, security deposit, truck to take my stuff with me and than start over...
Beautiful !!!!
I'm doing this in my fifties.
I should've done this in my forties...❤😉 She speaks the truth in so many ways.
I can relate 1000%
I hope more women get the courage to stand up and walk out for their happiness ... its not a loss, its the biggest gain ,
for yourself ❤
Thank you for sharing, dear. This just proves that it is never too late or too early to take your power back.
❤❤@@NovaPrincess
Wow! Sounds like my life! God showed me a way out of my "Christian" marriage. He provided a way out and I took it... divorce. Finally, I just wanted to follow Jesus and I didn't care what people might say about me. I have been freed. People always act like I should be so sad because of divorce and my response is: I'm better now. I spent many years making myself small, crying, suffering emotional abuse, being told his affair and porn use were my fault...so after 18 years of marriage I was done. People say that I seem so much happier now...and I am! My kids are better now too, they get time away from their narcissistic father.
Great guest!!!❤ Thank you for exposing the lies The Church has used to hurt so many women. I will be sharing your book and story.😊
I agree with you. Sometimes women marry because of our parent's relationships and the church stating that marriage is the covenant of God which marriage is but the church lacks the teaching of how to be a wife as well as a woman. Woman feel that a marriage defines who they are but God's wants couples that marry one another because they align with one another instead of marrying because of attraction. Love in a marriage is dieing oneself daily not abusive behavior.❤
I wish I learned this 15 years ago.😢
It took me many years into adulthood to finally realise that perhaps marriage doesn't really benefit women. It only benefits MEN...it keep them safe, sane, with a sense of belonging while controlling the women they married controlled and weaponside on fantacy of what is like to me somebody's MRS.
Yep
Going thru a divorce after 24 years and I can so relate to this I interview. I married potential and am divorcing reality. 😮💨
I keep saying that too many married women are not happy at all and people don't want to believe it. These situations are very, very common.
☹️☹️☹️
I am 43 and just left 17 years of toxic marriage. Can relate with her so so much..
Now this is power! Married for 14 years and my ex walked away but there was a lot of warning signs and the last 7 years were miserable! So glad to be free.
44 yrs old and getting a divorce after 8yrs. Slowly moving forward and I can't wait to get me back.
I pray for all of us to have a spirit of discernment.
Its sad that most people stay in unhealthy relationships and waste more years but essentially nothing is lost in learning lessons but why waste more time by staying when you have confirmation from God. ❤
Sheesh, she's speaking my story... this touched me deep.. Thank you for speaking and sharing this
I’m doing this in my late 60’s , what doesn’t serve me is my marriage it is time to go, agree. Time to love again and live now ! It becomes very clear that it was not serving my well being. Amen I get to be loved as I want to be. Always plan B !
I'm really receiving the message here. I'm going through a terrible time in my relationship and have no idea what's next or where to start. I've been doing a lot self reflecting and I will say that I am beginning to find my voice and not allowing my husband to have control over my thoughts, opinions, and beliefs. The part when it was you have to start with one step before you get to the otherside is resonating with me right now. I'm a huge thinker and over thinker but I'm very much trying to learn to take action if I want to get to the otherside.
OMG - Her storyline is so similar to mines! Thank you for this interview. I could literally cry - not tears of sadness, but tears of joy and gratitude for more clarity.
Me tooo
Lao Tzu said "Be like water", meaning we need to be flexible and yield to the flow of life. We learn too late that life often presents us with Plan As, Bs, Cs, Ds, all the way to Z, and beyond😪 Congratulations on listening to your soul and following your heart's desire❤
Did you just quote Lao Tzo in relationship to this video??
I love this analogy. It reminds me of “Let it flow” by Toni Braxton. ❤
This episode sets us free!! Dream a new dream!!
Yes! My main drive for wanting to leave is to show my daughter what not to accept … kids are smart and peep everything without parents arguing and all. Energy doesn’t lie.
💯 agree
40 where??? This woman looks like she's in her early 20's! I love how she decided to choose herself first! So many women out there stay in the mess afraid of what other people will say!
I was you too, never speaking up, not voicing my opinions, just accepting everything as it was. The first time I questioned my ex-husband of 31 years he discarded me with a thud, crash and a bang (as said by Andrew from Narc Daily.)
I admire your strength, autonomy, beauty and believing in yourself. Young women need to hear your story. Thank you for sharing!!❤
Love this ❤ I left husband of 28 years at 58 years old. I’m now 60 and still trying get divorce finalized. But this video confirms why I left. Thank you ❤❤❤
Gosh, you spoke to me. Ive been so scared of losing someone i thought was the love of my life. I had all the what if's. I prayed, fasted, begged them to love me the way i loved them. Respect me the way i did them. I bent backwards so as to keep the relationship work. Nothing happened. Been walking on eggshells to a point that now, just the sound of my phone ringing shakes me up. I've become a shadow of myself just so they see my worth. You sharing your story has just woken me up from that slumber. I pray that God gives me the will to let go and let him do his will in my life. It hurts so bad but i guess, ill get over it as time goes by. Step number 1, ive blocked communication midway as i watch this. I need to find myself again. Thank you for sharing your story.
You can do it..❤🎉🎉
That’s my story 😢
30:16 I resonate with this so much!! I’ve been working this muscle the past couple of years myself. I had a similar situation with my daughter. We went out to eat and the dish came out with excessive peas- i don’t like peas. 😂 They weren’t named in the dish on the menu, but here they were. I didn’t want to make any waves or appear difficult so I planned to just move them to the side. My daughter said “umm excuse me…can they take off the peas? Mom, you don’t even like peas. She doesn’t like peas.” 😂😂 It was such a small thing, but watching my own daughter exercise her voice on my behalf was empowering. ❤❤❤
I left my husband of 42 years with only suitcases. I am starting new from beginning. I am happy to be free from suffering!
I didn't know I needed to hear this today....This interview was life changing🥹🙌🏾
Trying to date at 40 is so hard. To have standards at 40 means pretty much being alone. It’s still worth the peace. I was alone before as well. Men are so disappointing - they want everything for nothing, mostly.
36, 9 month separated, SAHM of three boys!! Needed to hear this today!!
I have watched this video almost every day for 2 weeks cause it is so validating and empowering to me. I’m in the thick of all
Of this and this has given me
So much comfort. Thank you!
One thing I really appreciate about Lisa, she goes straight in with the key questions. Love that! You pack so much into interviews but in such a natural progression and give your guest time and space to tell their story.
I have been living my most peaceful life post-divorce after 17 years of marriage. God is continuing to restore all that was taken from me. I’m truly an overcomer!🙌🏾 Patrice,thank you so much for your authenticity, you are a blessing. Thank you Lisa!🫶🏾
I’m listening through tears. Your message is aiding in my healing. 61 and divorced for 3 years. The church turned away from me ( Not God). And I’m struggling to reinvent myself yet I am confident that God is near and I will prevail. Awesome testimony and so encouraging. ❣️❣️😔Thank you!
After 15 years, my divorced was final this June. I can relate to many points raised in the discussion.
I’m only 16 min into this where the guest is sharing about all the extravagant gifts that she received and how people were telling her that at least she’s getting that.
It may be too personal but I do hope she shares some of the things that he did so we can understand the real costs, the trade that she was making. One of the main concerns I have with this younger generation of ladies is that they’re really buying into this “as long as he’s a provider” mentality but sometimes the cost is way too high. It’s better to have self worth, dignity and respect for yourself than to put yourself in a position where someone knows they can buy your acceptance. I’m glad she got out.
Yes to all of this! I have always been skeptical of the (what I like to call) 'adult baby' or 'prostitute mentality' that is being pushed by these 'secure the bag' and 'get money at any cost' women pushing this subjugated materialism as 'feminism'. I am a homeowner and 4B woman (no dating, no kids, no xes, no marriage). I would not trade this freedom for anything.
Yess 👏🏻
I completely agree with this.
Shes told the story elsewhere and from my understanding, he didnt really do anything tragic. And in my opinion, nothing to warrant divorce. She felt unfulfilled. And Im sorry, America and its tragic divorce record…destroying a covenant that you made with God and your spouse over “no longer feeling fulfilled” is insane. Thats something that is reparable with time and effort.
@@PWard324that’s not true. I listen to her podcast and she has shared that he was unfaithful multiple times. Stop spreading lies.
With youth there is optimism and hope. Men’s words hold space in your mind even if their actions contradict it. By the time you have life experiences and mature you realise that looking at facts will serve you better. People are who they are, not who you imagine they could be.
Mind blowing interview. I totally resonate with Patrice's experience . My divorce helped to evolve me into a better version of myself.
Same. It was so painful, but I emerged better praise God x
So many people just don’t want to let go because of how long they stay on their relationship ( to not say SUFFERINGSHIPS). But sometimes the decision you don’t want to make can be the best blessing for a fulfilling life. Thank you Lisa for bringing this heartbreaking topic, because I believe that many wish they can stay on their marriages.
Will Smith needs to watch this and let Jada have her freedom.
They say there are three rings in a marriage 🤦🏾♀️
Engagement ring
Marriage ring
Suffering 😅
Thank you for this episode. This is definitely my story. I divorced my husband because he did not respect the person I was. And I realize I deserve better. I learned to love myself first and I’m having a time of my life right now enjoying life with my family my children, my grandchildren. I feel truly blessed.
I just had the greatest epiphany at about the 19 minute mark, Lisa! I am a high-achieving woman that is overconfident in this terrible relationship. Amen! I thank God you girls shone that light for me. It all makes sense now. You just saved me! Thank you so much for giving me the tools to remain a badass woman 🫶
I turned 40 in may, got on a plane and i jave not been back. It was not planned but yet here i am still on the road and everythinvs aligning. I said a similar thing, i am allowed to live for myself. So i am doing the thing but its not without repercussions. Others may wanna hold me back but i will not do that to myself.
Watching this after separation... I got married at 24 and immediately I stated noticing red flags... I attempted to leave 1st week after wedding but fear of the unknown... I was convinced to stay and support my husband... I wasted 5good years.... Until I felt no, am gonna die ... And I quit the marriage at 29yrs . Rebuilding my life now... I joined nursing school and on my 2nd year...dear woman... Listen to your guts... Your intuition, if you feel something is wrong, it surely is..
Your comment touched my soul.
@mochaswirl181 🫂🫂🫂
Baby, you spoke to my soul during this interview. So much of what you said resonated with me. Immediate follow, Ms. Washington!
She's amazing! I've been through 2 of her programs
The guest is so strong, smart and pretty woman!
I love her jacket!
It really suits her beautiful self as well! 😍
I am not being valued by my mother or daughter. My whole family basically. I love beautiful things and I always was kind of judge by it. I kept of hoping that my mother or daughter would change but they dont. Now I know its not about them but about me! In my heart I feel like breaking all contact with them. The thought by that make me even happy! Cuz I feel I am attached to them to finally change. But I am willing to loose the attachment with them for me to pursue my life and surround myself to people who really appriciate me for me!❤
Her story is my story!! 🙌🏾🙌🏾. My final settlement agreement hit my inbox this morning and my heart sank but as soon as I opened TH-cam and this episode was the 1st one AND validated every single choice I made! Thank you for this!
I am in tears. God is so good thank you so much. You don’t know how much you have helped me get them signs reassurance prayers answered like thank you. I wish you the best and you’re gonna impact so many peoples lives. God is good all the time.
Lisa this segment with Patrice Washington was AMAZING AND INFORMATIVE!!! THANK YOU,SHE IS A JEWEL.
Your daughter is right ❤ People are not mind-readers. Communication is key! I relationships women need to tell their men what they want. Sometimes men are good men but their women also lack communication. It goes both ways!
There are men who don't have introspective on their behaviors. Men measure being a husband with how well they provide material things. It's all about " symbols". People's behavior are traits that they cannot change and if those traits are disturbing to the other person it's not a compatible or complementary marriage. It serves only one person. Communication cannot change anyone's traits it in their DNA.
Love your honesty ⚔️ our faith is weaponized 1000%
Yes. Speaking nothing but the truth. When it’s time to let it go, there is nothing no one can do or say to make you stay. I knew it was my time when I felt like I was the only one invested and pouring my all into the relationship.
I agree been there it was draining
I am so blessed to have come across this video Lisa. The things that stood out for me were losing all these beliefs society has that you have to be married, need two parents to raise fantastic children..even though it might be true but then you can’t be caught up in such a marriage because you might lose yourself. And Yes, chains break, strongholds breaks because you have a voice! This is for me because I am currently separated from my husband, with our 3 kids.
Wow. My experience is quite different. All the women in my family were/are married. It is the reason why I wasn’t in a rush because I knew from their situations that everything that glitters isn’t gold. Best wishes to her!
There is a chain breaking!!! Love that!! So powerful. Thank you!❤️❤️❤️
Oh my word!!! I can relate moment by moment to your journey 🙌 right down to the length of marriage, my “idea” of married life, choosing me, my dream man list, online dating to “learn” my dream man list, what I will and will not accept……after 3 months we locked in after meeting online and together still after 1.5 years! Thank you so much for sharing- I didn’t realize just how far I’ve come 🙏🏻 💪 🔥 ❤
She is so right about the "dying alone" comment.
We are suppose to die alone. It happens all the time in hospitals. Love ones are only obligated to bury us
I discovered this channel few weeks ago but I am glued because I learnt at least one thing from each guest.
He possibly couldn't have cared less about the message. But, you honoured yourself. That's massive.
I and the world needed to hear this. Thank you so much. This has given me so much to move forward.
Thank you for changing my life, thank you for sharing your story because I feel so much power within myself to live for myself and not feel guilty from walking away from a relationship that is draining me emotionally.
I have stayed in a relationship for 10years because I didn't want my kids to grow up without a father because I didn't know my father.
This conversation is EVERYTHING! So much juice and GOLD NUGGETS!! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!! I've cried, I've laughed and I've learned soooo much! Thank you! thank you! Thank you! xx
I listen to this and I see myself. I have started working on this muscle this year. Working on me! I love this one!
This video is one of the best I have ever listened to. It resonates with me so much.
Been there... I can relate to this lady so much. Divorced at 39.....im 48 soon.. And still not searching.... 😂😂😂😂😂But yes... Happier.
The most impactful talk i have listened to in a long while....i never listen to long podcasts i just forward or get tired at some point but i listened to this from beginning to end. Thanks for this it was very inspiring for me❤
Going through the ‘What Ifs/ What Is’ was so helpful! ❤
Your light shines so bright, it inspires others to shine theirs. Thank you for being you Patrice.
I just want to say this channel is saving lives. It’s helping me get up again. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. God bless you❤
Am in Cameroon and am very blessed with all your said my chains have broken and u are just enhancing my decision
This resonates with me and my story so very well. I was in a 17 year relationship and got divorced in 2023 when I finally mustered the courage to leave. Thank you for sharing your story ❤
WOW!! She is beautiful & bold . This is a chain breaking moment, and she is universal.
Officially a big fan of Patrice Washington ❤❤❤❤❤
And will be using “ I don’t receive it “
🎉🎉🎉🎉
Wow. Patrice is such an inspiration. ❤ Thank you for having her on the show. Hopefully she will return to share with us in the future. ❤ I am going to find her YT now. I particularly loved the “what is” parts. This is something I can add to my current practices to find clarity.
Congratulations for raising ownership & woman empowerment! We have to own our feminine power 👑
Omg!! Coach Patrice!! I got conviction and confirmation at the same time! I'm an alumni of P2P and Command the Stage around the same time you were making your transition. I'm so glad you chose you! ❤
I am so blessed to have come across this video Lisa. The things that stood out for me were losing all these beliefs society has that you have to be married, need two parents to raise fantastic children..even though it might be true but then you can’t be caught up in such a marriage because you might lose yourself
I was in a confused state, but you have made me be able to make a decision I had to make 4 years ago ❤
Jesus, hear my prayers. I’m holding on to my faith, as a single parent things are hard on me both of my sons are special needs and I’m constantly struggling to provide the basic necessities for them. I’m so ashamed. God hear my prayers. Every month I constantly struggle to pay my bills and struggle to provide groceries for my children. BUT I KEEP FAITH that’s all I have.
I’m almost 40 on December 1 and I am at the point where I need to face reality of ripping off the bandaid and file these papers. I understand that I made a mistake and instead of living in the nightmare I need to let go. I wish no ill will for my husband I just understand that our season is done. I will live with no regrets just new beginnings
Excellent interview! Ms. Washington has a new fan! 🤗
35:02 Yep. You are definitely speaking to me. Thank you, I have the clarity I have been seeking
This is a beautiful conversation 18:35 so real
My family tried to push me around as the last daughter and I decided to speak up and I was frank about my stands of pursing my dreams and all my visions God showed me and it was a saga that lasted days but I felt super good for being so vocal and sincere
I just want to say how grateful I am for the platforms women now have to talk about our cares and concerns and be HEARD. This is saving my life. I'm Zimbabwean. At 46 and married for 21 years I knew very early in the marriage that I needed to leave but it was and still is against church culture and societal norms here. I have been so afraid to leave because I worry about finances and how I will survive on my own here. He is the breadwinner and I have been a stay at home Mom and housewife throughout the marriage. There are no assets to dissolve, there will be no financial renumeration. When you mention such a thing as divorce many will discourage it, you see that they worry about you becoming a burden when you need help starting a new life without home or finance. So I am gathering the courage to do this on my own, somehow, in this year 2025. I believe that life experience, maturity and a determined mindset is going to help me to find my way forward. Please let us continue to pray for and support one another ladies. I love you all. God bless your channel Lisa. From Zimbabwe.
Excellent guest, and conversation Lisa you are an amazing host and interviewer. The group of 40+ women I have that are contemplating divorce is growing and I’m so glad you did this video, even though you’re in a satisfied marriage.
"I had learned to normalize bad behavior." Wow. That is a powerful revelation.
Wow! This is confirming for sure! As I watch and listen to your story I know without doubt this is the goodness of God to help free people from prisons that they thought they had to stay in.
Thank you for this. Patrice, you are so blessed with wisdom, and I am grateful you shared and gave us a great example and leadership.
Thank you! What an amazing interview! It made go deeper into some hard questions ....which I would have not dared to ask myself until recently....should I go on holiday with the same lovely and hostile amongst other things family and have once again anxiety and regret?