You Are NOT a Fruit | James Acaster: DAVE Talks | Dave

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ม.ค. 2025

ความคิดเห็น • 114

  • @rocketforthree4479
    @rocketforthree4479 4 ปีที่แล้ว +341

    I'm saying this because people have been confused before.
    James is NOT bombing in front of a tough crowd:
    The Audience are intentionally silent, they are part of the show.

    • @matehavlik4559
      @matehavlik4559 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Actually it looks more like it’s a stock footage audience, filmed in front of a green screen.

    • @AH-te5gs
      @AH-te5gs 3 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      It's actually a crowd of cabbages. Because people are not fruit.

    • @christopherboggon9054
      @christopherboggon9054 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      It’s also not funny on a base level, seems more like a spoof of TED talks pretentiousness

    • @OptimusGPrime
      @OptimusGPrime 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@matehavlik4559 100% this. All green screen with stock footage audience.

    • @kevinw712
      @kevinw712 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      seems a bit sad this would need to be addressed, since you can pretty clearly see a number of the audience members trying to hold in their laughter after awhile

  • @atadamobrien
    @atadamobrien 2 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    "and you'd be right if that statement were true" is a phrase I need to use more often

  • @Harambae613
    @Harambae613 4 ปีที่แล้ว +308

    I would have gotten him a cabbage and said “Some little boy paid me to give you this and say “You’ve been cabbaged again.

    • @amphattack4200
      @amphattack4200 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      oh no, not the cabbage boy

    • @hirondelle398
      @hirondelle398 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      4:08 And that's just the tip of the iceberg!

    • @dusssss631
      @dusssss631 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Ellaceit's good you've pointed that out, but just leaf it.

    • @maryl.95
      @maryl.95 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      *CABADGED

  • @berkpick
    @berkpick 4 ปีที่แล้ว +215

    He's literally asking to be cabbaged again.

    • @luller85
      @luller85 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He's practically asking. Not literally.

    • @GronaldS
      @GronaldS 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@luller85 He is literally asking for "veg". Cabbage is veg. The statement is correct. If it had involved quotes, and the quote had been incorrect then it would have been an inaccurate statement. So either you think cabbage is a fruit, or you're an insufferable pedant.

    • @luller85
      @luller85 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Gronald Scratch you're absolutely right that he's asking for veg. You're proving my point. All cabbage is "veg". Not all "veg" is cabbage..

    • @jonathanzimmerman634
      @jonathanzimmerman634 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Oi oi savoy.

  • @kevingarren
    @kevingarren 3 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    Goddamn I love these peaches.

  • @sianvaladian8574
    @sianvaladian8574 3 ปีที่แล้ว +115

    Weird title because I've been snacking lately and I'm pretty sure that I'm ready to eat apricots

    • @spoabysplayz7481
      @spoabysplayz7481 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      go for it! ✨

    • @KrisHudsonDrums13
      @KrisHudsonDrums13 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m dried apricots

    • @Elle_Danio
      @Elle_Danio 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Not everyone is as ready to eat apricots as they think they are!

    • @maryl.95
      @maryl.95 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I'm not as dried apricot as I thought I was.

    • @thedunyadoneya2628
      @thedunyadoneya2628 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Vegetable lover, I see...

  • @issaposter
    @issaposter 4 ปีที่แล้ว +104

    tell me why i am in love with this man

    • @manasviii885
      @manasviii885 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Because he is a magnificently weird cabbage in the world of veg tomatoes 😂

    • @colinwhite4710
      @colinwhite4710 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He’s passionate

    • @postedbyneal
      @postedbyneal 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Isn't that the easy question?
      The hard question: why aren't way more people in love with this man?!

    • @issaposter
      @issaposter 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@postedbyneal absolutely

    • @natashaavital8713
      @natashaavital8713 9 วันที่ผ่านมา

      British accent, talent, vulnerability and the fact that his deadpan comedy gives him a cool persona

  •  3 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    with the tomato pics after the "every single one of you" I WAS SCREAMING LAUGHING

  • @justarlo898
    @justarlo898 4 ปีที่แล้ว +143

    "people are not a fruit" wrong i am gay

  • @agitatedhugtime
    @agitatedhugtime 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    I don't know what I just watched. But I do know it's the best thing I've ever watched.

  • @hollyludvigsen6763
    @hollyludvigsen6763 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    How does this make no sense and complete sense at the same time?!? I love him

  • @cybernova400foo4
    @cybernova400foo4 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    James acaster is the best

  • @hirondelle398
    @hirondelle398 3 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    Oh no, he said "Pardon the pun" before the actual pun... poor James, he doesn't learn!

    • @fliss3017
      @fliss3017 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      at least he didn't say 'no pun intended' lmao

  • @wnaish7541
    @wnaish7541 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    3:05 still hasn’t taken his mums advice

  • @Ed-fr7mw
    @Ed-fr7mw 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    im extremely fruity, thank you very much james acaster.

  • @jessicanunn5298
    @jessicanunn5298 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    i mother frickin love James

  • @natashaavital8713
    @natashaavital8713 9 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I don't know why but the "all vegetables are real" line always makes me laugh the hardest

  • @Bcsmith333
    @Bcsmith333 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The desperation of the seeds to be believed cracks me up 🤣

  • @kaia6758
    @kaia6758 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    i love him. that’s all.

  • @MB-xw1tu
    @MB-xw1tu 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Just gonna say... aubergines and courgettes are fruits (and so are cucumbers.. because... seeds)
    Also because of my love of absurdity... I like the next level attention to detail. All the audience members are at conference and as such, are wearing conference name badges around their necks. Perfect :chef's kiss:

  • @NeilTaylor1
    @NeilTaylor1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    James Acaster does an entire Ted Talk about tomatoes and nobody notices that he can’t pronounce tomato.

    • @maryl.95
      @maryl.95 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      You say tomato, I say tomato.

    • @NeilTaylor1
      @NeilTaylor1 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@maryl.95 Tomato!

  • @samodonoghue2497
    @samodonoghue2497 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Awe bravo! Acaster makes me laugh so hard I usually end up with leaky eyes, love him!

  • @isabella2197
    @isabella2197 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    oh my god, i love this man.

  • @Emilyannc
    @Emilyannc 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This is performance ART ahahaha best part of 2021

  • @christopherrobbertse3416
    @christopherrobbertse3416 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    How is the crowd not in hysterics? 🤣

    • @patiencekillz
      @patiencekillz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      They’re supposed to be, I’m pretty sure this is mocking ted talks

    • @maryl.95
      @maryl.95 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Because they are not there. There is no crowd. It's all an illusion.
      Death comes to us all.

  • @poojasbehaviour8530
    @poojasbehaviour8530 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    masterful!!!

  • @annabass4957
    @annabass4957 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    amazing

  • @laurencegribble1033
    @laurencegribble1033 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    At 3:59 James lists tomatoes as a vegetable... ultimate troll?

    • @Taobeth
      @Taobeth 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      He also puts up an eggplant as a vegetable, after explaining that fruit have seeds.

  • @freyab5066
    @freyab5066 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    GODDAMN I LOVE THESE PEACHES

  • @oddishhime
    @oddishhime 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    "all soup is vegetables" uhh chicken????

  • @MsASMARVEL
    @MsASMARVEL 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    i'm not a fruit but i AM ready to eat apricots

  • @kerwaii
    @kerwaii 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    *sees title* idk I'm pretty fruity...

  • @sunnyward5013
    @sunnyward5013 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Getting some Robert Benchley vibes. :)

  • @actif1
    @actif1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I was told that the banana is a herb

  • @dandaman6935
    @dandaman6935 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    He's making a point that a tomato is a fruit, that's cool, but he's happy to say that a banana is also a fruit. It's a berry, that's why it has no seeds.

    • @Skyking549
      @Skyking549 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Oh boi. Just wait till i tell you that wild bananas have seeds.

  • @boldbileg
    @boldbileg 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    1:19 I don't think she knows James is a comedian 🤣

    • @amosw766
      @amosw766 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's part of the act

  • @ForgiveAllOfUs
    @ForgiveAllOfUs 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Would be fun IF premises weren't wrong : tomato is a fruit AND a vegetable, as is pumpkin, and plenty other vegetables. Now there are regulations : tomatoes are vegetables in the US since late 19th if I remember correctly, due to exportation regulations. Tomato is a fruit in EU since 2004 because of a portuguese tomato jam (and EU regulations specify that jam is made of fruits).
    Yet while there is a biological definition of a fruit (a fecunded ovary), there is no such definition for a vegetable. It's basically defined as the part of a cultivated plant we consume. If tomatoes don't fit in...

    • @2159ianmilne
      @2159ianmilne 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Comedian: why did the chicken cross the road?
      ForgiveAllOfUs: Well actually chickens are usually found in chicken coops or industrial chicken farms.
      It would be highly improbable that a chicken would venture to the kerbside and attempt to navigate through traffic.
      I find the premise and the believability of this joke to be flawed, so I will derive no pleasure in any attempt at a punchline.
      Everyone else: This is why you’re never invited to anything.

    • @ForgiveAllOfUs
      @ForgiveAllOfUs 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@2159ianmilne Fair enough :)
      edit : plus I have no idea what post-brexit tomatoes status is...

    • @2159ianmilne
      @2159ianmilne 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@ForgiveAllOfUs. I’m guessing you’re a government minister then :)

  • @ThatJingleJangleFeeling
    @ThatJingleJangleFeeling 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I'm a meat.

  • @RootbeerAndBeans
    @RootbeerAndBeans 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Oh my gosh, thank you!! So glad i'm not the only one who thinks Ted Talks are ridiculous :D

  • @jelly2584
    @jelly2584 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    OrAnges

  • @CrashSable
    @CrashSable 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    This is SO OLD! Why the re-upload?

    • @UAndDave
      @UAndDave  4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      If anyone makes a joke about repeats on Dave here we'll be really upset...

    • @kateolivia6027
      @kateolivia6027 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@UAndDave that's almost a dare....

    • @jbennett5634
      @jbennett5634 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      It's become self aware

    • @moonpie21012
      @moonpie21012 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ha ha this is the best comment thread🤣

  • @AH-te5gs
    @AH-te5gs 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    14 people haven't eaten tomatoes in custard.

  • @maccy4829
    @maccy4829 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Why’s he saying TOMAYTO

  • @reubensimon4318
    @reubensimon4318 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Tom-ay-to. eurgghh.

  • @Glasstable2011
    @Glasstable2011 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    As someone who identifies as a fruit I find it deeply offensive that James would deny my opportunity for self-expression

  • @beccaguy9512
    @beccaguy9512 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    the title is misleading, for i am as dried apricots as i think i am

  • @Klaproossje
    @Klaproossje 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    But a courgette is also holding seeds, isn't that a fruit too than? 🤔

    • @Cpt_JaK
      @Cpt_JaK 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Aafke Blootvoetje yes! & aubergines in that case, 🌶 tooo

  • @charliehabberley6905
    @charliehabberley6905 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    How are they taking this so seriously

    • @jsilberg
      @jsilberg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      they're part of it

    • @Chigz10
      @Chigz10 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Acting

  • @Roneish1996
    @Roneish1996 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    I feel like everyone already knows that tomatoes are in fact fruits so his set up is highly flawed. If it was a different fruit he used as an example it’d be easer to buy into this whole premise. I say this as a massive fan of James.
    Also the refusal to be labelling people is not a great idea when doing so means their needs aren’t met. I am autistic and only found out last year and am still finding psychologists and mental health “professionals” who say that why do you need a label. When I clearly need a label for my struggles to be treated as valid and accommodated for. Fuck the status quo of not accommodating disabilities and the systemic ableism.

  • @makaveliuk86
    @makaveliuk86 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Why he's saying tomato like an American, god only knows....🤔😂😂😂

  • @davidholt8074
    @davidholt8074 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    The non laughing is painful

    • @UAndDave
      @UAndDave  2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Fruit and vegetables are a very serious matter and this is a very serious lecture.

  • @emuwalton
    @emuwalton 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Eggplant is a fruit.

  • @Do_Odles
    @Do_Odles 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Tough room

    • @moonpie21012
      @moonpie21012 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      They're part of the film its a skit

  • @ceri7858
    @ceri7858 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    "people are not a fruit" then explain homosexuality ? checkmate

  • @mhell1694
    @mhell1694 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    That crowed is fruitless, no life in any of them
    Fun fact, a tomato is a berry same with bananas

    • @abantibarman6775
      @abantibarman6775 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      it’s parodying tedtalks so the audience were told not to interact or laugh

    • @mhell1694
      @mhell1694 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@abantibarman6775 hahah that makes sense, I was watching it and felt sorry for James😂

  • @Kurix1000
    @Kurix1000 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    My feelings got real hurt when no one laughed once

    • @moonpie21012
      @moonpie21012 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Its part of the joke - they're acting

    • @Kurix1000
      @Kurix1000 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@moonpie21012 nah I realize that its just frustrating

  • @williamwilson5127
    @williamwilson5127 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I am somewhat mystified, did someone dare James to make an unprepared presentation?

    • @jelly2584
      @jelly2584 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Its a sketch

    • @williamwilson5127
      @williamwilson5127 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jelly2584 A crude drawing at best... Seriously though, it didn't have the usual convoluted arc that his material often displays. Perhaps it was a tangent.

  • @Mine4062
    @Mine4062 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    WTF is this?! 😆

  • @nicosmind3
    @nicosmind3 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Watch out, people who identify as fruits will be complaining in the comment section

  • @jamescarr4662
    @jamescarr4662 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    cripplingly boring.

    • @MrThrib
      @MrThrib ปีที่แล้ว

      I suspect the crippling happened before you watched this.