I'm a delivery driver for a large UK supermarket. Often when delivering shopping, I'm the first person these elderly people have seen all day. The amount of offers of cups of tea I receive is amazing. I've never really thought of it as loneliness before, just politeness. I might have to accept one the next time I get an offer, even if it makes me late.
Please do. I have been caring for my mother for nearly a year now. I had to quit my job and home to do as she lives abroad, but she was all alone before that. Genuinely kind people made all the difference to her life before I moved here, they still do.
This made me realise just how lonely and isolated I am. A retired teacher with severe health and mobility issues, I was a very active, workaholic, deeply involved in all aspects of school, church and community life, until critical illness forced me to retire early and spend lengthy periods of time in hospitals, undergoing lifesaving treatments. Many of my friends could not handle my changed circumstances and gradually I've been left with a few good friends who are family members. God and the NHS have saved my life and still work diligently to help me cope with everyday life, but somehow I need to learn at 60years of age how to claim my place in a society that regards the less able as invisible or of no use so therefore not worthy of their notice.
I am in NYC but have a similar story. I had many friends and an active life til i became very sick and one by one, all of my lifelong college and childhood girlfriends disappeared from my life. Some of them even told me that my illness depressed them. I spend almost all my time by myself and i am so grateful for my pets who love me no matter what.
You are most lucky. My last friend has stopped calling. When I call she is distant. I don't move fast with my disabilities. I move, just not fast. No one likes to drop me at the door and go park, for years I did all the driving, bought all the lunches, etc. Now I am of no use to them. I cannot believe it at times. They know I have no one to tell. My family are all gone. I have my 2 dogs. Thank God.
@@stormy8092 i just wanted you to know that a human being read your post here. Me. We are not so different. I have my 2 cats and my brothers. Not much more than that though. I just try to fill my time with reading, exercises, and learning new things. Depending on myself.
I'm no spring chicken but I bought some nice lawn furniture for my 80 year old neighbor so the two of us could sit on her porch and watch people go by and chat about life. She seemed to really enjoy it and I did too. I think having a neighborhood with porches can provide opportunities for social interaction. I would have fun with people walking their dogs and even tossed them treats.
I am 82 years old, live alone and love it. I have family, A few close friends, work part-time, and participate in activities. I cook, entertain, and take adult education classes. If one is still healthy, life is what you make it. I understand some folks might have health problems that make living alone difficult. But to others, take responsibility for your own happiness. Do not wait for others to call you. Do volunteer work, get a part-time job, join a senior center. Stop feeling sorry for yourselves. Count your blessings.
While good advice in general, some people really aren't successful in finding friends as they age, many have declining health, many have no family or family who lives very far away, etc. Telling them to count their blessing and stop feeling sorry for themselves is not helpful. Hopefully you would not say that to someone who suffers from severe anxiety and depression. You are VERY fortunate to have your health and a few close friends. Perhaps you could volunteer to do outreach to seniors who aren't as fortunate.
I agree with you , anne. It is what you make it! I'm 69 and plan to do as you did, keep in touch with friends and above all else, no self pity! Thankfully I finally learned the quit feeling sorry for yourself lesson at 40! And your health is everything. I'm lucky to have good health (so far)!
@@christinep.I agree, what you say is true for someone who has depression or grief. Many elders are grieving the loss of a spouse, friend or parts of their identity. Unfortunately and perhaps fortunately, despite how uncomfortable it is at an older age and our challenges, life and nature requires that we keep growing as individuals, improving our own relationship with ourselves and others.
@@christinep. I have had my challenges, and I still do have my challenges. I have suffered from anxiety and depression. I have had health problems. I have overcome them and/or been able to cope through prayer and meditation. I stand by what I said. Count your blessings and stop feeling sorry for yourself. That said, I am not referring to people with severe or terminal health problems. I am not referring to those who have suffered unimaginable losses.
After 21 years of running my company in Vietnam I retired to return to live back in Perth, Western Australia. It was like moving to Mars. I knew no one and my two mid-40s sons and their wives rarely contact me though both live within 15 mins drive. I am trying hard to meet new friends via retirement clubs. We have morning teas and lunches once a month. Sadly, I am the only one who ever invites anyone around to my place for casual chats. No one else can be bothered. returning the invitation. In my region, the art of home visits that cost almost nothing and incur minimum work, has been lost.
I’m kinda in that same boat. I’m 50 years old now and I’ve gotten to the point where I’d rather be alone (most days during the week).. Only once in a while do I get that loneliness feeling come back. But for the most part, I’ve become so accustomed to being alone that I don’t think I’d be able to handle having someone around me at all times. I’ve gotten so set in my ways, that I think it would create more anxiety and stress. However, sometimes-mainly on weekends-I get bouts of anxiety and loneliness.
@@mitch5222 I understand I was so active and now I can't seem to get excited about life I'm always tired and achy. I want a dog but I worry I won't be able to care for it when I can 't even get myself up to go walking. They say say its in my mind. I
@@sandraalegria3439 At 73+ , my two dogs give me nudges to get up every am & go walking ( 3 or 4 times a day ) no matter the weather . Whether walking on our road or going to a park , people smile , wave , chat a few words , etc. & even those small moments are really uplifting . You could even go to a park to walk w/ out a dog & by simply smiling & saying hi to others of various ages ( parents w/ kids , teens , folks your age ) , open the door to joy . You need not adhere to a schedule , join a group , etc. - simply show up & smile !! 🥰 Fun in summer to take a book , find a shady bench & people watch - but still remember to look up , wave 'n smile . Just enjoy being in the moment ... and then carry that feeling home w/ you .
No need to be lonely. Rescue some animal companions who also need love and a home, take care of them and love them and you won't feel lonely anymore. They will give your life purpose.
@@nalou6933, Exactly!!! I never ever thought that I would be without a cat. I dream of them every night. The ones I had and the ones that my imagination conjures up!
animals give so much joy in our life. Even if (I hope not!) loose my lovely husband one day, I still have my cats, my dog around me, I hope I will never be lonely.
I'm 65 years old and live alone in my home. For more than ten years, my home has remained free of unfamiliar guests. Insects of all kinds-flies, spiders, ants, and wasps-turn my house into a haunted dwelling. I was left alone as long as I treated them with respect. When I pass away in solitude, allow them to consume my lifeless body!
Been out of work 10 months now due to COVID ... live isolated with 3 animals ... will turn 62 and am facing exactly this. Family shuns you often times when you get older. No one wants to hire you. No self pity here, only the realization that roommates at older ages can really be a healthy way to live. Will look into that in the coming months.
Sheryl C. I agree. Also, for me, it's simply hard 2 keep my hopes high, & energize myself at 62. (considering having worked so hard all my life...for others). I truly never imagined I'd hav 2 work hard to just to face another day.
Anyone who feels like he or she needs someone to talk to feel free to talk to me i also need to do something for others no matter how small it may look.. Feel free to talk to someone and dont be afraid of discrimination .. We all at one time shall became old so be polite to everyone, life is a journey
Thank you for this film , unfortunately in North America you could not do this tea .It would not be safe .The loneliness has to be dealt with in a different way .😊😊❤
It's very important to GET OUT and get fresh air🌻⛄☔🌞 There's stuff going on at the library 📚💻🎭🎲 Take an art class, a fitness class 👟🎨 YOU got to get off your but and find these places!
It is not that simple. Sure you can do all these things,but it does not take away the lonliness. telling people to get off their b, I think there is a much kinder way. One day you may be there. I have always had people in my life, especially family, until several years ago, when my son married a women who has alienated most of the family. Sure I went through a momen t of self pity, but try to get out, but this does not mean a person can not be lonely.
Plenty people cant get of there but because firstly they have mobility, walking issues. Secondly some cant even afford a bus fee to go volunteer or anywhere else. By the way art classes and fitness classes are very expensive. Not everyone can afford that. Many cant even leave home because of mobility issues.
I’m only 66. I have remained unmarried for 29 years. My wife at that time (36) left me because of my drinking and drugging. My son was 4. I went to my first 12 step meeting around 2 weeks later. I have remained sober in 12 step since. The wife did not come back and 3 years later she remarried ‘the better man’. I was 40. Many tries at relationships, staying sober, becoming a better man and a good father. Fate has been harsh. My son is now 32 and married with a new child. I have to do the calling. I now have no car, very little money, and nothing that a woman wants. I know that there will be no love partner in my life. I struggle to survive financially here in Southern California. My who family lives in in California, but this is not the same state that I have spent my life in. I will seek a psychologist and maybe a group of folks that are in the same boat. I’m a fighter, but the sorrow i feel can be overwhelming.
According to recent stats, over 25% of young people (40 and under) have rejected one or both parents. Loneliness and heartbreak are epidemic. "Am i my brother's keeper?"
If your health permits volunteer your time and service somewhere in the community. Example: Work part-time at a school, be it noon yard duty, an aide in a classroom or an after school program helper. Best wishes.
I am not afraid of aging, if you are healthy you can still do a lot of things but if you are not so lucky with your health you would find very hard even socializing.
@@sarahgrace9419 it is better to become frail at 70 years old instead of 30. I was diagnosed with a genetic muscle disorder when I was still young and my mother is helping me in my daily tasks and she is 70 years old. You can be very frail at young age and with genetic disorder you can be born already sick. I much prefer to be an healthy old woman than a young sick child. Don't you?
You could be falling unhealthy without being aware of it. My mother was physically perfect in her mid 80s, no cancers, no chronic illnesses, never smoking and drinking, eating healthy, spending summers swimming in our beach house… ideal! But then dementia struck suddenly and made her into totally vulnerable and dependent person for the last two years of her life. She was lucky to some extent that she was taken care of by our family regardless that she lost the ability to recognize any of us. Her long term friends retreated into their lives. I understand them, Alzheimer’s is difficult and cruel. I still wonder what horror it must had been for her every day waking up in her house and among people that she no longer recognized. Witnessing the end of her days sends shivers through me as I worry about the old age since the new generation in my family is no longer as committed to the family as we were taught to be - for a good reason! And I don’t know of one country - with perhaps exception of Netherlands - where the senior population has great facilities and protections. Of course it’s always easier with money around, but even that can be a double edged sword. I wish that there would be more activism related to improving safety and lives of older population.
Just recently, as i reached for my phone to check messages and news with my morning coffee, it suddenly hit me-- would i ignore anyone else this way? Bury my face in this screen? No. Time to listen to Him, and give Him my attention. Just quietly, over tea... 👑✝️🕊️♥️☕
God can't give me a physical hug. God can't drive me to a doctors appointment. God can't audibly talk to me in a conversation. That's why we have churches, so real human beings can help real human beings. Just praying about it is an act of irresponsibility as said by St.James. The impersonality of modern Christianity is pure evil. Jesus was intensely personal.
Lonely can happen at any age not just the elderly. Life doesn’t come to you, you have to be brave and go get it. The positive of internet and iPads is even with a disability you can socialise at home with FaceTime, similar groups and also listening to podcasts, learning new things on you tube. Don’t give up life as we are just not here long enough.❤
Yes. It's getting rougher for me. Not feeling well.. Staying home more. Now my handicapped son had to move farther away, his rent went up 200.00. my daughter lives hours away. I would love to not always eat alone. Or a friend to thrift shop w.me. I try not to get down. But....
It's really bad at night as I have friends I can visit during the day but when we (my dog and I) get home I feel a bit lonely. If I didn't have a dog my life would be intolerable yet I still feel lonely. If I had been a better father I guess I'd see my children more often, we make our beds and we have to sleep in them I guess. I refuse to be one of those people who complain about their children not visiting them.
how are you doing now? Have you tried calling them up or leaving a msg to just say 'Hello?' I should call my mom later, she's 80 and lives alone with her dog too
I think you've highlighted one of the many reasons life has become lonelier and more depressing. Delivery drivers are treated very badly by their employers, tracked and monitored and overworked. V different to the local postman on his bike from the past, who'd have had time to have a quick chat and make sure elderly people in the community were OK.
I just talked with a friend across the country (United States) and suggested we do tea or a meal over zoom, about every 4 weeks. Yeah, loneliness and I are occasional companions. Sometimes its relatively fine. And at other times, it feels horrible. I occasionally approach my elder neighbors and bring them bread, or help move the snow. It feels good to help. And I think they get something out of it too, to receive something.
I really liked this. I thought that was ann excellent little twist of sorts with the phone message from 'Heather'. I am sure that not only does this resonate with a lot of older people, but even people more in my age group (late 40s) and even younger. We are all so much in an atomised world that the irony of having so much technology at our disposal to connect with people and yet....
Kind of scary. I am 65 and am just coming into a situation of isolation and only have 655 dollars coming in a month. I must sell my home as a consequence. Lately I have watched videos about actors in the past as they are now many have died. Now I am facing the relevance to my own life. Again it is a little scary. Lessons on humility. Knowing the Lord, is very helpful. I am never completely forgotten or abandoned although it can feel like it at times especially having friends turn on me. I sometimes feel that I have 7.5 billion enemies. But I have a cat.🙂
Ted.....Your comment caught my eyes. I am 73 and when I was in my 60's I already knew what was coming ahead, it just gets worst and now the pandemic with all hell breaking loose, it's no fun, God bless you ~
You do that too? I thought it was just me. When I watch a movie or TV series where I know the actor died, I kinda pause and consider it for a moment. Yes, as the average of actors dying approach closer to my age, it is a little disconcerting. My wife lucked into the solution to retirement finance issues, 30 years ago she married me when I was 21 and she was 35. I still have another about 18 years to retirement. I pay the bills and she spends her retirement money going to bingo and staying out of my hair... win, win. LOL. So there ya go, slap on some makeup and go find you a young buck. Sorry, it is 2AM here and I am a little silly. I hope everything works out for you.
These days there are plenty of online groups seniors can join just to chat, etc. Check with your local health center, hospital or senior center. You’ll make friends so quickly and you’ll love it! ❤🎉❤
Every day of life you have your own decision to laugh and make it a good day or to feel sad. I started with 66 years my old hobby again, even while I'm sitting in an electric wheel chair, I ride a small motorbike. We are an example for the younger. And I like it to make people smile about my retro bike and telling me their stories. But if it's a sad day, that's okay too. I'm thankful for the food on my plate, a home, and I try to help others. I took and take all the packages for my neighbors, but not invite them, not expecting thankfulness. It's just normal. A cat of my neighbor adopted me. Last year the cat died and I took care for my neighbor and now she takes care for me. Let it flow!
This lady has a beautiful home and apparently a decent income. She seems healthy and active enough to join a club or take a class instead waiting around for her family to visit. Many elderly are so much more worse off.
I have little patience with healthy, well off folks who allow themselves to be loney. I am 82 and still do most of the things I did when younger. Folks can volunteer! Do something to help others. And yes, some places hire the elderly. I have a part-time job. We are all responsible for ourselves.
@@Flufero23 Money and financial stability are not the entire person. We can't see all difficulties that may be inside a person just by sight. You haven't walked a mile in their shoes, maybe don't be so quick to judge.Loneliness among the elderly is devastating, with ill effects on health and wellbeing. Most elders are not so, "well off,".
@@angelabluebird609 It's true. One has no idea what is going on or has gone on on the inside of a person. We have no right to judge by appearances of things. This video brought me to tears.
This looks like it is staged and not authentic. Who walks around your home with nylons on and everything is so meticulous. Not saying that older people are not suffering from loneliness, yes it is real.
I certainly know the feeling it's heartbreaking and very very lonesome and sad and depressing you don't understand unless you're going through it I can relate wholeheartedly your children have their own lives to live so you don't like to bother them😢
why do people always say that. i do not believe just bec you answer yourself, does not mean you are crazy. I am sure when you add things up in your add, you also say the answer. or if ask yourself, I wonder if your crazy Aunt Mary will tell one of her stories at the next family gathering: "oh, Oh yes, she will."
I bet she'd give up that beautiful house for a shack with some company. It is sad we spend all our lives buying bigger and bigger houses, spending massive sums of money and time on renovations to get our house just so and in the end it becomes our prison... our mausoleum.
Any healthy older person can find company. Of course there are those with physical, mental, or emotional problems. I'm not talking about those. There is volunteer work, part-time jobs, adult classes, senior centers, etc., etc., the list goes on. I am 82, I know.
Looking at the time when this video clip was uploaded to TH-cam, I feel justly right to feel sad. It was even before the pandemic broke out, let alone the present time when we are living kind of isolated from each other due to social distancing. Loneliness is intrinsic in us, but the effect could even b more devastating and pronounced if it is worsened by the situation n condition in which human contact n touches have become a rarity with the advent of gadgets and the so-called telecommunications enhancing devices. It is a bitter fact.
Sad story. The imagined encounter with the delivery boy, unrealistic as it was, just added to the overwhelming sadness. And We don’t do tea in America but it is apparently a still prized custom.
I lost my police officer husband. Our son came to live with us to help me with my husband. I raised my son after a short marriage and worked 3 jobs until I could work just one. My son worked at the boys club and became Boy of the Year. When he was 18 he went into the Marines and I remarried at 38 my policeman. Now after a divorce my son lives with me once again and we do everything together. Life has come full circle. I am 78 and he is 58 and we just took a weeks trip to Knotts Berry Farm. I miss my husband every day but love having my son with me both of us retired. Each faze of life is different but each one can be good I am lucky I have my husbands large retirement and my retirement and social security and my son has his Marine retirement and soon social security. I know that I am lucky even though I have lost Mom and Dad and Grandparents and cousins and Aunts and Uncles and so many friends. Most of all I lost my husband of 38 years. Every day is a gift.
People are social animals. When/if we are lonely it's often useful to reach out and help other people. We can sometimes provide the little bit of human contact the other person needs . . . and it can do just as much good for ourselves.
My wife is 14 years older than me. We got together when I was 20 and she was 34. At that age you don't consider the realities of your age difference. We have been together 31 years, recently as we have gotten older, the thought of her dying before me scares the bejesus out of me. We have had a wonderful life and I am not looking to start over, so I am staring down the barrel at many years being alone. I used to DJ weddings at several Royal Canadian Legion Halls in my area. As I understand it, some of them are in financial hardship and threatening to close. I don't know why they don't open membership to anyone over a certain age. Elderly people if lonely could show up any time and meet up with people their age similarly lonely and reminisce the old days. They could have event nights, etc. I think most vets would prefer to share their halls with non vets rather than lose them all together.
My wife was 7 yrs older than me, we had been together 40 yrs then suddenly within 5 months of being diagnosed with cancer passed away 4 weeks ago. Friends occasionally pop in but words fall of death ears. I'm living my worst nightmare. Nothing can prepare you for this. She was the life and sole of a party, everyone loved her. My sun shines no more.
@@stevepollard2169I'm so sorry for your loss 💔 but at least you had a wonderful wife/life partner! I was a single mother, and my only child died 30 years ago,this coming June, so my life is terrible!!!
I don’t think is a good idea to invite strangers into your house!just like that!..no,no! Find a hobby, go to the community center and socialize with people same age as you, Adopt a homeless cat,dog ,etc,they will love you to death ( if you like animals) grow Plants,join a club,you will meet people like you!..that’s what I am doing! I only have a son, But,he is always busy living his own life(nothing wrong with it)…I do get lonely sometimes ,my cats cheer me up!
I'm 64 I have a broken back.a female problem cant. See out of one eye.im taking care of my bedridden husband.for 2. Years.im running a ranch with livestock..been married 41 years.i love my husband.as long as I can keep doing what I'm doing.god bless everyone.know that you are loved.
Life does not have to be this way. Go to meet up groups…interact with people. And do not invite strangers into your home. Make friends…especially girl friends. Men are often cold to older women and don’t want to date them so make platonic connections and nurture those friendships!
"Men are often cold to older women and don’t want to date them..." How do you justify that sexist statement, I wonder. Because I, who identify as a male, would never say that women are often cold to older men, and don't want to date them, but rather, that women are sometimes cold to older men and don't want to date them.
@@ingenuity168 Her isolation has affected her outlook and she's unable to realize those facts. A reality for Too Many of our older adults!!! Remember to be kind whenever you're with a Senior adult. Most people Never let on about their sad and lonely situation.
I love being alone, thank you very much. And at one time I was a highly sociable person. I won't be watching this video because it isn't positive and things like this can really drag you down.
Hi there, I was wondering if I could use a short clip from this video? I work for a charity called Widows Empowerment Trust and I'm currently making a video on loneliness over Christmas.
What on earth? An older woman in good shape in a FABULOUS house? I'm a Brit about the same age who lives alone. I work full time and go to classes at night. Couldn't relate to this at all.
Me either. Would have been better to show a typical elderly lonely person with less options. This lady is well off and waiting for someone else to make her happy.
At 65, I lead a solitary life in my uncomplicated dwelling. It's hard to form friendships these days, and it requires a significant amount of work. It's becoming more common to encounter gold diggers nowadays. I don't have money. In my chest beats a heart that is pure gold. I have no use for individuals. Being alone in my home is a fun experience. My lonely entertainment is writing stories, playing video games, walking in the neighborhood, cooking food, and surfing the Internet.
Its vry different the culture in the west n the south asian culture cz here we highly respect our elders n we never abandoned them alone evn when they r sick..its sad to see many elderly live the last part of their life alone.
One of the smartest solutions I’ve ever read about for lonely people who have money was, buying a permanent cabin on a Cunard liner and traveling the world. All meals taken care of, hospital on board, people everywhere for company when in the mood, cabin cleaned, laundry done, no responsibilities, and they take care of you when the inevitable end comes.
Is this lady a typical lonely older person? She has a beautiful home, looks healthy enough to go out and meet people. It's hard, especially if you've lived your whole life as a couple and then your partner passes or leaves and your agin friends have problems. It will never be the same going forward but, if you have your health you DO have everything. What I would wish for this lady is someone to give her a little push, open a door to another future since she is timid and waiting, just can't bring herself to step out into the scarey world by herself.
@@franwebb7756 that's true. We can have empathy with everyone who is lonely -- even if she is well off and SHOULD get out and change from boring lonely life to starting out on her own. But it's true, a poor person who is isolated has fewer options. I suppose the only difference is, when you're poor you spend a LOT of time hunting for cheap food and housing. You can't buy friendship though -- that's available to all of us if we have the health and energy to stay involved in real life.
I never thought I would be 70 and lonely. I do not mind it yet. I have all creature comforts, 4 cats and a sweet little dog. But what really bothers me is my good fortune and how other people out there get be in worse shape and lonely. That breaks my lonely heart.
Very sad to watch her. I wish she would seek friends through her church or a senior citizens center. I am 84 and rarely see my family but have many friends from my working days and see people and talk to them if I go out. Staying home if you are lonely never is the answer!
Dare I say that a big cause of loneliness is the superficiality of life these days. Making friends out of strangers is a risky business. If you are over selective, you will fail. You have to trust more and accept people's differences and oddities. We have done a very good job of covering all individual needs, forgetting that we still live socially, and the richness of that life is about sharing rather than self-satisfaction.
Oh come on....life is what you make it and how you choose to see it. This lady has a beautiful home, financial security, food on the table and her mobility. She can choose to do hobbies, volunteer work, meet people at church or book clubs. ....things are a lot worse for many seniors, who have to worry about the basics.
Find a church that has a senior group if you can, and learn about Jesus and your life will change. My church in south Carolina really supports seniors and keeps them active and loved. Also there are senior centers that offer free exercise and bingo, art classes ect. We must put ourselves out there to meet people!!
No big deal. He legitimately couldn’t come in for tea. And she isn’t alone in the world. She has people that love her. Wow, life for lonely senior’s can be much worse than this. She has it pretty good.
@@MA-un1mj Where did you get this information? Just asking, not hating. And please don't say "It's common knowledge" or "science or medicine says so". I need more than that. Because I don't agree with you. There are plenty of people who are alone by choice.
I'm a Senior and I work and volunteer. I'm a CASA and I volunteer at a Cat adoption center, plus I'm involved with several clubs. Someone may have to help you find these things, but there is no need to be lonely sweet loves.
I also lost my husband and then covid on top of it, kids are grown and going their own way but I would never be that desperate to invite someone in my home that delivers packages how desperate is that? that lady needs help I go for a walk when I feel lonely in the house
Funny how life has changed and it’s also different in different cultures. My grandparents would invite a postman every day for a quick stiff drink. And most of the time he accepted. It was like that in every home, the poor guy must had been totally inebriated by the end of the day. I don’t even know how he cycled around 😅 since this was the golden age of delivering mail on bikes and motorcycles! Then, the family and neighbors were always around for lunch or just coffee and quick gossip. Once they fell ill, one of the neighbors was there to cook lunch and make coffee for them. I don’t think that they were lonely an hour in their lives. Grandma would actually excuse herself to go watch some of her favorite soaps in the afternoon. Their kitchen always smelled on food, wine and cigarettes and it was bubbling with laugher and quarrels too. I loved coming to see them every day and I miss them a lot. I miss that natural humanity where aging is just a normal part of life and the life doesn’t turn into a sad waiting room.
In Africa, we leave our children with our parents. They do the chores, run around the house, fight like like all siblings and cousins do. They learn good manners, go to church and have to come home from school. Instead of hanging around with the wrong crowd. This helps our careers and marriages. We extent and renovate our parents houses, send money and groceries. It is a win win situation.
And if they treated u like.... Cmon - they deserve whatever cms to them. Its a thin line between love & hate girls. Dont flip yr man around & treat him badly bcs one day ur karma will get u & yll receive what u dished out t a nice guy....
Volunteer! You'll meet people. If you have a car, deliver meals for Meals on Wheels, serve food at a homeless shelter, walk dogs at an animal shelter, watch someone's child for an hour to spell them, take a walk, volunteer at the senior center, library or community center, take an art class, teach a class at a senior center, library or community center, don't just lay there!
I'm a delivery driver for a large UK supermarket. Often when delivering shopping, I'm the first person these elderly people have seen all day. The amount of offers of cups of tea I receive is amazing. I've never really thought of it as loneliness before, just politeness. I might have to accept one the next time I get an offer, even if it makes me late.
Please do. I have been caring for my mother for nearly a year now. I had to quit my job and home to do as she lives abroad, but she was all alone before that. Genuinely kind people made all the difference to her life before I moved here, they still do.
@@marigoldbeam5475 Hii I know a child she can adopt to break her boredom 😊
You're such a good man brother.
😢😢😢I hope you can take them on the offer sometime. How sad.
Never happen in US. You'd be taking your life in your hands, plus...a real delivery person would lose their job for socializing on the company dime.
This made me realise just how lonely and isolated I am. A retired teacher with severe health and mobility issues, I was a very active, workaholic, deeply involved in all aspects of school, church and community life, until critical illness forced me to retire early and spend lengthy periods of time in hospitals, undergoing lifesaving treatments. Many of my friends could not handle my changed circumstances and gradually I've been left with a few good friends who are family members. God and the NHS have saved my life and still work diligently to help me cope with everyday life, but somehow I need to learn at 60years of age how to claim my place in a society that regards the less able as invisible or of no use so therefore not worthy of their notice.
❤ you are not alone, I feel your pain and I totally understand you for I am in a way like u
I am in NYC but have a similar story. I had many friends and an active life til i became very sick and one by one, all of my lifelong college and childhood girlfriends disappeared from my life. Some of them even told me that my illness depressed them. I spend almost all my time by myself and i am so grateful for my pets who love me no matter what.
I’m 38 and disabled. I think you’re worthy , you have achieved and contributed so much to society and now it’s time to focus on yourself ❤❤
You are most lucky. My last friend has stopped calling. When I call she is distant. I don't move fast with my disabilities. I move, just not fast. No one likes to drop me at the door and go park, for years I did all the driving, bought all the lunches, etc. Now I am of no use to them. I cannot believe it at times. They know I have no one to tell. My family are all gone. I have my 2 dogs. Thank God.
@@stormy8092 i just wanted you to know that a human being read your post here. Me. We are not so different. I have my 2 cats and my brothers. Not much more than that though. I just try to fill my time with reading, exercises, and learning new things. Depending on myself.
I'm no spring chicken but I bought some nice lawn furniture for my 80 year old neighbor so the two of us could sit on her porch and watch people go by and chat about life. She seemed to really enjoy it and I did too. I think having a neighborhood with porches can provide opportunities for social interaction. I would have fun with people walking their dogs and even tossed them treats.
Wish it wasn’t so hot. No one sits on their porch in this heat and walks are not pleasant either. So many beautiful waste porches in Florida.
This is just the way it is. Life never turns out the way we'd hoped. You become like an old piece of furniture...ignored and irrelevant. 😪
yep
Know Jesus ,God lives you
You are so right😢
True enough, but you are free to do what pleases you all of the time.
You can do what you please to do if you can afford it,it’s not always the case 😔😔😔🏦💶💷💰💸💴💵
I am 82 years old, live alone and love it. I have family, A few close friends, work part-time, and participate in activities. I cook, entertain, and take adult education classes. If one is still healthy, life is what you make it. I understand some folks might have health problems that make living alone difficult. But to others, take responsibility for your own happiness. Do not wait for others to call you. Do volunteer work, get a part-time job, join a senior center. Stop feeling sorry for yourselves. Count your blessings.
While good advice in general, some people really aren't successful in finding friends as they age, many have declining health, many have no family or family who lives very far away, etc. Telling them to count their blessing and stop feeling sorry for themselves is not helpful. Hopefully you would not say that to someone who suffers from severe anxiety and depression. You are VERY fortunate to have your health and a few close friends. Perhaps you could volunteer to do outreach to seniors who aren't as fortunate.
@@christinep. I agree❣
I agree with you , anne. It is what you make it! I'm 69 and plan to do as you did, keep in touch with friends and above all else, no self pity! Thankfully I finally learned the quit feeling sorry for yourself lesson at 40! And your health is everything. I'm lucky to have good health (so far)!
@@christinep.I agree, what you say is true for someone who has depression or grief. Many elders are grieving the loss of a spouse, friend or parts of their identity. Unfortunately and perhaps fortunately, despite how uncomfortable it is at an older age and our challenges, life and nature requires that we keep growing as individuals, improving our own relationship with ourselves and others.
@@christinep. I have had my challenges, and I still do have my challenges. I have suffered from anxiety and depression. I have had health problems. I have overcome them and/or been able to cope through prayer and meditation. I stand by what I said. Count your blessings and stop feeling sorry for yourself. That said, I am not referring to people with severe or terminal health problems. I am not referring to those who have suffered unimaginable losses.
After 21 years of running my company in Vietnam I retired to return to live back in Perth, Western Australia. It was like moving to Mars. I knew no one and my two mid-40s sons and their wives rarely contact me though both live within 15 mins drive. I am trying hard to meet new friends via retirement clubs. We have morning teas and lunches once a month. Sadly, I am the only one who ever invites anyone around to my place for casual chats. No one else can be bothered. returning the invitation. In my region, the art of home visits that cost almost nothing and incur minimum work, has been lost.
This is me at 56 😣 I’ve been so accustomed to years of loneliness that when people reach out to me I shut them out.
I’m kinda in that same boat. I’m 50 years old now and I’ve gotten to the point where I’d rather be alone (most days during the week).. Only once in a while do I get that loneliness feeling come back. But for the most part, I’ve become so accustomed to being alone that I don’t think I’d be able to handle having someone around me at all times. I’ve gotten so set in my ways, that I think it would create more anxiety and stress. However, sometimes-mainly on weekends-I get bouts of anxiety and loneliness.
I tired of this life like that
I do the same...@ 74yo. Life is very lonesome now. My children & grandchildren all live 2700 miles away. Not the "GoldenYears" at all. 😢❤
@@mitch5222 I understand I was so active and now I can't seem to get excited about life I'm always tired and achy. I want a dog but I worry I won't be able to care for it when I can 't even get myself up to go walking. They say say its in my mind. I
@@sandraalegria3439 At 73+ , my two dogs give me nudges to get up every am & go walking ( 3 or 4 times a day ) no matter the weather . Whether walking on our road or going to a park , people smile , wave , chat a few words , etc. & even those small moments are really uplifting . You could even go to a park to walk w/ out a dog & by simply smiling & saying hi to others of various ages ( parents w/ kids , teens , folks your age ) , open the door to joy . You need not adhere to a schedule , join a group , etc. - simply show up & smile !! 🥰 Fun in summer to take a book , find a shady bench & people watch - but still remember to look up , wave 'n smile . Just enjoy being in the moment ... and then carry that feeling home w/ you .
No need to be lonely. Rescue some animal companions who also need love and a home, take care of them and love them and you won't feel lonely anymore. They will give your life purpose.
It helps. But the loneliness is still there.. a human voice is appreciated by the elderly.
Many people cannot afford the vet, food and other expenses animals require. A shame. A real shame.
@@nalou6933,
Exactly!!!
I never ever thought that I would be without a cat. I dream of them every night. The ones I had and the ones that my imagination conjures up!
would love to. but cannot afford one, especially vet bills!
animals give so much joy in our life. Even if (I hope not!) loose my lovely husband one day, I still have my cats, my dog around me, I hope I will never be lonely.
This is why seniors get taken advantage of. The desperation is palpable.
Better to be alone then to be with people they don't love you. You are safe when you are alone
Please..Please...eldelry people, do not invite strangers into your home. ..
True.....!!!!!!
You don't what is she going through. One day you will have the test of her life.
@@hanam3589 was?
Exactly
I'm 65 years old and live alone in my home. For more than ten years, my home has remained free of unfamiliar guests. Insects of all kinds-flies, spiders, ants, and wasps-turn my house into a haunted dwelling. I was left alone as long as I treated them with respect. When I pass away in solitude, allow them to consume my lifeless body!
Been out of work 10 months now due to COVID ... live isolated with 3 animals ... will turn 62 and am facing exactly this. Family shuns you often times when you get older. No one wants to hire you. No self pity here, only the realization that roommates at older ages can really be a healthy way to live. Will look into that in the coming months.
Sheryl C. I agree. Also, for me, it's simply hard 2 keep my hopes high, & energize myself at 62. (considering having worked so hard all my life...for others). I truly never imagined I'd hav 2 work hard to just to face another day.
who cares
You are worthy you are not alone 🙏🏼❤️
@@rainbeau9752 You’re right. Who cares about you and your ignorant attitude ? Stuff yourself.
Anyone who feels like he or she needs someone to talk to feel free to talk to me i also need to do something for others no matter how small it may look..
Feel free to talk to someone and dont be afraid of discrimination ..
We all at one time shall became old so be polite to everyone, life is a journey
Thank you for this film , unfortunately in North America you could not do this tea .It would not be safe .The loneliness has to be dealt with in a different way .😊😊❤
It's very important to GET OUT and get fresh air🌻⛄☔🌞
There's stuff going on at the library 📚💻🎭🎲 Take an art class, a fitness class 👟🎨 YOU got to get off your but and find these places!
It is not that simple. Sure you can do all these things,but it does not take away the lonliness. telling people to get off their b, I think there is a much kinder way. One day you may be there. I have always had people in my life, especially family, until several years ago, when my son married a women who has alienated most of the family. Sure I went through a momen t of self pity, but try to get out, but this does not mean a person can not be lonely.
Plenty people cant get of there but because firstly they have mobility, walking issues. Secondly some cant even afford a bus fee to go volunteer or anywhere else. By the way art classes and fitness classes are very expensive. Not everyone can afford that. Many cant even leave home because of mobility issues.
In a world full of people no one should be lonely 😢
So sad to see older people feeling forgotten n lonely.
A different and original way to explain the problem of loneliness in elderly people.
different??????
she's posh, has this amazing house, yeah i really feel sorry for her.
I’m only 66. I have remained unmarried for 29 years. My wife at that time (36) left me because of my drinking and drugging. My son was 4. I went to my first 12 step meeting around 2 weeks later. I have remained sober in 12 step since. The wife did not come back and 3 years later she remarried ‘the better man’. I was 40. Many tries at relationships, staying sober, becoming a better man and a good father. Fate has been harsh. My son is now 32 and married with a new child. I have to do the calling. I now have no car, very little money, and nothing that a woman wants. I know that there will be no love partner in my life. I struggle to survive financially here in Southern California. My who family lives in in California, but this is not the same state that I have spent my life in. I will seek a psychologist and maybe a group of folks that are in the same boat. I’m a fighter, but the sorrow i feel can be overwhelming.
Lovely kept home.
Very elegant dressed lady.
Tea would be perfect.
It looks like she could afford
helping others, adopting
animals, rent out a room etc.
According to recent stats, over 25% of young people (40 and under) have rejected one or both parents. Loneliness and heartbreak are epidemic. "Am i my brother's keeper?"
I understand I'm so lonely I could die.
If your health permits volunteer your time and service somewhere in the community. Example: Work part-time at a school, be it noon yard duty, an aide in a classroom or an after school program helper. Best wishes.
💕🌟💝🙏🏻🤗
Undust your last name Alegria and go find more of it 🥳🎈🎉💝💃🏻🕺🏽🎊🪅
I am not afraid of aging, if you are healthy you can still do a lot of things but if you are not so lucky with your health you would find very hard even socializing.
We will all become old and frail that’s reality of life human body will deteriorate over time no matter what......!!!!!!!
@@sarahgrace9419 it is better to become frail at 70 years old instead of 30. I was diagnosed with a genetic muscle disorder when I was still young and my mother is helping me in my daily tasks and she is 70 years old. You can be very frail at young age and with genetic disorder you can be born already sick. I much prefer to be an healthy old woman than a young sick child. Don't you?
You could be falling unhealthy without being aware of it. My mother was physically perfect in her mid 80s, no cancers, no chronic illnesses, never smoking and drinking, eating healthy, spending summers swimming in our beach house… ideal! But then dementia struck suddenly and made her into totally vulnerable and dependent person for the last two years of her life. She was lucky to some extent that she was taken care of by our family regardless that she lost the ability to recognize any of us. Her long term friends retreated into their lives. I understand them, Alzheimer’s is difficult and cruel. I still wonder what horror it must had been for her every day waking up in her house and among people that she no longer recognized. Witnessing the end of her days sends shivers through me as I worry about the old age since the new generation in my family is no longer as committed to the family as we were taught to be - for a good reason! And I don’t know of one country - with perhaps exception of Netherlands - where the senior population has great facilities and protections. Of course it’s always easier with money around, but even that can be a double edged sword. I wish that there would be more activism related to improving safety and lives of older population.
I find it enriching to talk to God in my room in the mornings about anything. He listens. He is ever present.
Amen ❤
He will never leave us 😊
Just recently, as i reached for my phone to check messages and news with my morning coffee, it suddenly hit me-- would i ignore anyone else this way? Bury my face in this screen? No. Time to listen to Him, and give Him my attention. Just quietly, over tea... 👑✝️🕊️♥️☕
God can't give me a physical hug. God can't drive me to a doctors appointment. God can't audibly talk to me in a conversation. That's why we have churches, so real human beings can help real human beings. Just praying about it is an act of irresponsibility as said by St.James. The impersonality of modern Christianity is pure evil. Jesus was intensely personal.
Me too. His presence is real, though many will not agree....a peace that surpasses all understanding.
Lonely can happen at any age not just the elderly. Life doesn’t come to you, you have to be brave and go get it. The positive of internet and iPads is even with a disability you can socialise at home with FaceTime, similar groups and also listening to podcasts, learning new things on you tube. Don’t give up life as we are just not here long enough.❤
Yes. It's getting rougher for me. Not feeling well.. Staying home more. Now my handicapped son had to move farther away, his rent went up 200.00. my daughter lives hours away. I would love to not always eat alone. Or a friend to thrift shop w.me. I try not to get down. But....
I understand....best wishes
It's really bad at night as I have friends I can visit during the day but when we (my dog and I) get home I feel a bit lonely. If I didn't have a dog my life would be intolerable yet I still feel lonely. If I had been a better father I guess I'd see my children more often, we make our beds and we have to sleep in them I guess. I refuse to be one of those people who complain about their children not visiting them.
how are you doing now? Have you tried calling them up or leaving a msg to just say 'Hello?'
I should call my mom later, she's 80 and lives alone with her dog too
I might become one of the lonely elderly people too one day.
Amazon drivers don't have time for a cup of tea they work their ass off😂❤
True. Delivery drivers are tracked by GPS and if they delay too long, they can be fired.
I think you've highlighted one of the many reasons life has become lonelier and more depressing. Delivery drivers are treated very badly by their employers, tracked and monitored and overworked. V different to the local postman on his bike from the past, who'd have had time to have a quick chat and make sure elderly people in the community were OK.
I just talked with a friend across the country (United States) and suggested we do tea or a meal over zoom, about every 4 weeks. Yeah, loneliness and I are occasional companions. Sometimes its relatively fine. And at other times, it feels horrible. I occasionally approach my elder neighbors and bring them bread, or help move the snow. It feels good to help. And I think they get something out of it too, to receive something.
I really liked this. I thought that was ann excellent little twist of sorts with the phone message from 'Heather'. I am sure that not only does this resonate with a lot of older people, but even people more in my age group (late 40s) and even younger. We are all so much in an atomised world that the irony of having so much technology at our disposal to connect with people and yet....
Kind of scary. I am 65 and am just coming into a situation of isolation and only have 655 dollars coming in a month. I must sell my home as a consequence. Lately I have watched videos about actors in the past as they are now many have died. Now I am facing the relevance to my own life. Again it is a little scary. Lessons on humility. Knowing the Lord, is very helpful. I am never completely forgotten or abandoned although it can feel like it at times especially having friends turn on me. I sometimes feel that I have 7.5 billion enemies. But I have a cat.🙂
Don’t worry man it’ll all work out :)
God bless
Ted.....Your comment caught my eyes. I am 73 and when I was in my 60's I already knew what was coming ahead, it just gets worst and now the pandemic with all hell breaking loose, it's no fun, God bless you ~
Yes, the Lord, is all we have in the end.
Hello dear
You do that too? I thought it was just me. When I watch a movie or TV series where I know the actor died, I kinda pause and consider it for a moment. Yes, as the average of actors dying approach closer to my age, it is a little disconcerting. My wife lucked into the solution to retirement finance issues, 30 years ago she married me when I was 21 and she was 35. I still have another about 18 years to retirement. I pay the bills and she spends her retirement money going to bingo and staying out of my hair... win, win. LOL. So there ya go, slap on some makeup and go find you a young buck. Sorry, it is 2AM here and I am a little silly. I hope everything works out for you.
These days there are plenty of online groups seniors can join just to chat, etc. Check with your local health center, hospital or senior center. You’ll make friends so quickly and you’ll love it! ❤🎉❤
..im 42 & already started these patterns years ago💔
I to know what it’s like to be on my own and lonely , no visits from my kids so sad 😞
❤️
Aw hopefully with the holidays coming up you will see more of your family. ☺️
Every day of life you have your own decision to laugh and make it a good day or to feel sad.
I started with 66 years my old hobby again, even while I'm sitting in an electric wheel chair, I ride a small motorbike. We are an example for the younger. And I like it to make people smile about my retro bike and telling me their stories.
But if it's a sad day, that's okay too. I'm thankful for the food on my plate, a home, and I try to help others. I took and take all the packages for my neighbors, but not invite them, not expecting thankfulness. It's just normal.
A cat of my neighbor adopted me. Last year the cat died and I took care for my neighbor and now she takes care for me. Let it flow!
This lady has a beautiful home and apparently a decent income. She seems healthy and active enough to join a club or take a class instead waiting around for her family to visit. Many elderly are so much more worse off.
True.
I have little patience with healthy, well off folks who allow themselves to be loney. I am 82 and still do most of the things I did when younger. Folks can volunteer! Do something to help others. And yes, some places hire the elderly. I have a part-time job. We are all responsible for ourselves.
@@Flufero23 Money and financial stability are not the entire person. We can't see all difficulties that may be inside a person just by sight. You haven't walked a mile in their shoes, maybe don't be so quick to judge.Loneliness among the elderly is devastating, with ill effects on health and wellbeing. Most elders are not so, "well off,".
@@angelabluebird609 It's true. One has no idea what is going on or has gone on on the inside of a person. We have no right to judge by appearances of things. This video brought me to tears.
This looks like it is staged and not authentic. Who walks around your home with nylons on and everything is so meticulous. Not saying that older people are not suffering from loneliness, yes it is real.
I must be so lucky, l have never felt lonely in my life and have mostly been on my own
Yeah it just drags on & on. Hours seem like days.
I certainly know the feeling it's heartbreaking and very very lonesome and sad and depressing you don't understand unless you're going through it I can relate wholeheartedly your children have their own lives to live so you don't like to bother them😢
Talking to yourself isn't a problem, it when you answer your self you have a problem. I'm 69 and bored stiff, so I read a lot.
why do people always say that. i do not believe just bec you answer yourself, does not mean you are crazy. I am sure when you add things up in your add, you also say the answer. or if ask yourself, I wonder if your crazy Aunt Mary will tell one of her stories at the next family gathering: "oh, Oh yes, she will."
I answer myself. Its cool.
I talk to the cat. Sometimes she answers. I'm 75, ill and also bored stiff
Her house is beautifully decored
I bet she'd give up that beautiful house for a shack with some company. It is sad we spend all our lives buying bigger and bigger houses, spending massive sums of money and time on renovations to get our house just so and in the end it becomes our prison... our mausoleum.
@@johncasey5594 I mean if you're destined to end up in a prison you at least want it to be a nice looking one
Any healthy older person can find company. Of course there are those with physical, mental, or emotional problems. I'm not talking about those. There is volunteer work, part-time jobs, adult classes, senior centers, etc., etc., the list goes on. I am 82, I know.
Looking at the time when this video clip was uploaded to TH-cam, I feel justly right to feel sad. It was even before the pandemic broke out, let alone the present time when we are living kind of isolated from each other due to social distancing. Loneliness is intrinsic in us, but the effect could even b more devastating and pronounced if it is worsened by the situation n condition in which human contact n touches have become a rarity with the advent of gadgets and the so-called telecommunications enhancing devices. It is a bitter fact.
So sad. Heart breaking. Still so young and enough vibrancy to help others. Where are the church?
Old ppl should talk to each other .just like we do
Arunava, I agree, & when I'm out shopping, I say hello to people & chat if they respond. Many elderly have thanked me just 4talking 2them.
All the £$€¥ in the world won’t make up for the dreaded bottomless pit of emptiness..........that is being alone.............😞
Sad story. The imagined encounter with the delivery boy, unrealistic as it was, just added to the overwhelming sadness.
And
We don’t do tea in America but it is apparently a still prized custom.
Devastating,oh why can’t governments prepare facilities,helpers for poor people?Worldwide elders are living in havoc
Read, TV, TH-cam, walk, cats, dogs, gardening, volunteer.
treat you like youre mind is broken when your mind is focused beyond belief.
I lost my police officer husband. Our son came to live with us to help me with my husband. I raised my son after a short marriage and worked 3 jobs until I could work just one. My son worked at the boys club and became Boy of the Year. When he was 18 he went into the Marines and I remarried at 38 my policeman. Now after a divorce my son lives with me once again and we do everything together. Life has come full circle. I am 78 and he is 58 and we just took a weeks trip to Knotts Berry Farm. I miss my husband every day but love having my son with me both of us retired. Each faze of life is different but each one can be good I am lucky I have my husbands large retirement and my retirement and social security and my son has his Marine retirement and soon social security. I know that I am lucky even though I have lost Mom and Dad and Grandparents and cousins and Aunts and Uncles and so many friends. Most of all I lost my husband of 38 years. Every day is a gift.
You are not lucky you are blessed.There's a difference
People are social animals. When/if we are lonely it's often useful to reach out and help other people. We can sometimes provide the little bit of human contact the other person needs . . . and it can do just as much good for ourselves.
She has a beautiful home. The post office must pay very well in the UK.
envy is not a helpful thing!
@@arleneirvine1526 assumptions are not a helpful thing. I'm in no way envious. I'm more curious that this whole thing is a staged set.
My wife is 14 years older than me. We got together when I was 20 and she was 34. At that age you don't consider the realities of your age difference. We have been together 31 years, recently as we have gotten older, the thought of her dying before me scares the bejesus out of me. We have had a wonderful life and I am not looking to start over, so I am staring down the barrel at many years being alone. I used to DJ weddings at several Royal Canadian Legion Halls in my area. As I understand it, some of them are in financial hardship and threatening to close. I don't know why they don't open membership to anyone over a certain age. Elderly people if lonely could show up any time and meet up with people their age similarly lonely and reminisce the old days. They could have event nights, etc. I think most vets would prefer to share their halls with non vets rather than lose them all together.
I’m in the same spot right now 😔
My wife was 7 yrs older than me, we had been together 40 yrs then suddenly within 5 months of being diagnosed with cancer passed away 4 weeks ago. Friends occasionally pop in but words fall of death ears. I'm living my worst nightmare. Nothing can prepare you for this. She was the life and sole of a party, everyone loved her. My sun shines no more.
@@stevepollard2169I'm so sorry for your loss 💔 but at least you had a wonderful wife/life partner! I was a single mother, and my only child died 30 years ago,this coming June, so my life is terrible!!!
I don’t think is a good idea to invite strangers into your house!just like that!..no,no!
Find a hobby, go to the community center and socialize with people same age as you,
Adopt a homeless cat,dog ,etc,they will love you to death ( if you like animals) grow
Plants,join a club,you will meet people like you!..that’s what I am doing! I only have a son,
But,he is always busy living his own life(nothing wrong with it)…I do get lonely sometimes
,my cats cheer me up!
I'm 64 I have a broken back.a female problem cant. See out of one eye.im taking care of my bedridden husband.for 2. Years.im running a ranch with livestock..been married 41 years.i love my husband.as long as I can keep doing what I'm doing.god bless everyone.know that you are loved.
Life does not have to be this way. Go to meet up groups…interact with people. And do not invite strangers into your home. Make friends…especially girl friends. Men are often cold to older women and don’t want to date them so make platonic connections and nurture those friendships!
"Men are often cold to older women and don’t want to date them..."
How do you justify that sexist statement, I wonder.
Because I, who identify as a male, would never say that women are often cold to older men, and don't want to date them, but rather, that women are sometimes cold to older men and don't want to date them.
The concept is beautiful ❣️🔥
She has a large beautiful home, why not rent a room to a single lady?
She's rich enough and healthy enough to do a lot more things.
@Newbeginnings19 2019 I agree.
This isn't a documentary
@@ingenuity168
Her isolation has affected her outlook and she's unable to realize those facts.
A reality for Too Many of our older adults!!!
Remember to be kind whenever you're with a Senior adult.
Most people Never let on about their sad and lonely situation.
I love being alone, thank you very much. And at one time I was a highly sociable person. I won't be watching this video because it isn't positive and things like this can really drag you down.
Hi there, I was wondering if I could use a short clip from this video? I work for a charity called Widows Empowerment Trust and I'm currently making a video on loneliness over Christmas.
What on earth? An older woman in good shape in a FABULOUS house? I'm a Brit about the same age who lives alone. I work full time and go to classes at night. Couldn't relate to this at all.
Me either. Would have been better to show a typical elderly lonely person with less options. This lady is well off and waiting for someone else to make her happy.
At 65, I lead a solitary life in my uncomplicated dwelling. It's hard to form friendships these days, and it requires a significant amount of work. It's becoming more common to encounter gold diggers nowadays. I don't have money. In my chest beats a heart that is pure gold. I have no use for individuals. Being alone in my home is a fun experience. My lonely entertainment is writing stories, playing video games, walking in the neighborhood, cooking food, and surfing the Internet.
Thank you for thumping up on my comment. I sincerely appreciate your thumbs-up to brighten my lonely heart.
At least you have NHS or social service peeping on oldies. In Malaysia nobody cares two hooters! Sad really!
Its vry different the culture in the west n the south asian culture cz here we highly respect our elders n we never abandoned them alone evn when they r sick..its sad to see many elderly live the last part of their life alone.
One of the smartest solutions I’ve ever read about for lonely people who have money was, buying a permanent cabin on a Cunard liner and traveling the world. All meals taken care of, hospital on board, people everywhere for company when in the mood, cabin cleaned, laundry done, no responsibilities, and they take care of you when the inevitable end comes.
So sad.😢But don't invite strangers ,they may not be nice and you could put yourself in danger.
This will be me.
Really heart wrenching! : (
Is this lady a typical lonely older person? She has a beautiful home, looks healthy enough to go out and meet people. It's hard, especially if you've lived your whole life as a couple and then your partner passes or leaves and your agin friends have problems. It will never be the same going forward but, if you have your health you DO have everything. What I would wish for this lady is someone to give her a little push, open a door to another future since she is timid and waiting, just can't bring herself to step out into the scarey world by herself.
Not the typical I've seen. Looks like she has means to travel etc. keeps herself up well. A lot of elderly in less fortunate situations don't .
@@franwebb7756 that's true. We can have empathy with everyone who is lonely -- even if she is well off and SHOULD get out and change from boring lonely life to starting out on her own. But it's true, a poor person who is isolated has fewer options. I suppose the only difference is, when you're poor you spend a LOT of time hunting for cheap food and housing. You can't buy friendship though -- that's available to all of us if we have the health and energy to stay involved in real life.
I never thought I would be 70 and lonely. I do not mind it yet. I have all creature comforts, 4 cats and a sweet little dog.
But what really bothers me is my good fortune and how other people out there get be in worse shape and lonely. That breaks my lonely heart.
Beautiful home.
That made me feel sad.
Very sad to watch her. I wish she would seek friends through her church or a senior citizens center. I am 84 and rarely see my family but have many friends from my working days and see people and talk to them if I go out. Staying home if you are lonely never is the answer!
she must have a maid to look after that beautiful home. surely they talk some. I would love to be her roommate.
This isn't real Barbara
Cleaning service comes once a week. Care givers come to work.
But I would ditch that big house for a RV/caravan and hit the road.
And a 🚘
you are seen differnetly than you feel.
Dare I say that a big cause of loneliness is the superficiality of life these days. Making friends out of strangers is a risky business. If you are over selective, you will fail. You have to trust more and accept people's differences and oddities.
We have done a very good job of covering all individual needs, forgetting that we still live socially, and the richness of that life is about sharing rather than self-satisfaction.
made me cry
I understand
Oh come on....life is what you make it and how you choose to see it. This lady has a beautiful home, financial security, food on the table and her mobility. She can choose to do hobbies, volunteer work, meet people at church or book clubs. ....things are a lot worse for many seniors, who have to worry about the basics.
Find a church that has a senior group if you can, and learn about Jesus and your life will change. My church in south Carolina really supports seniors and keeps them active and loved. Also there are senior centers that offer free exercise and bingo, art classes ect. We must put ourselves out there to meet people!!
No big deal. He legitimately couldn’t come in for tea. And she isn’t alone in the world. She has people that love her. Wow, life for lonely senior’s can be much worse than this. She has it pretty good.
Tru, but mankind wasn't intended to be isolated.
@@MA-un1mj Where did you get this information? Just asking, not hating. And please don't say "It's common knowledge" or "science or medicine says so". I need more than that. Because I don't agree with you. There are plenty of people who are alone by choice.
I'm a Senior and I work and volunteer. I'm a CASA and I volunteer at a Cat adoption center, plus I'm involved with several clubs. Someone may have to help you find these things, but there is no need to be lonely sweet loves.
I also lost my husband and then covid on top of it, kids are grown and going their own way but I would never be that desperate to invite someone in my home that delivers packages how desperate is that? that lady needs help I go for a walk when I feel lonely in the house
Funny how life has changed and it’s also different in different cultures. My grandparents would invite a postman every day for a quick stiff drink. And most of the time he accepted. It was like that in every home, the poor guy must had been totally inebriated by the end of the day. I don’t even know how he cycled around 😅 since this was the golden age of delivering mail on bikes and motorcycles! Then, the family and neighbors were always around for lunch or just coffee and quick gossip. Once they fell ill, one of the neighbors was there to cook lunch and make coffee for them. I don’t think that they were lonely an hour in their lives. Grandma would actually excuse herself to go watch some of her favorite soaps in the afternoon. Their kitchen always smelled on food, wine and cigarettes and it was bubbling with laugher and quarrels too. I loved coming to see them every day and I miss them a lot. I miss that natural humanity where aging is just a normal part of life and the life doesn’t turn into a sad waiting room.
Alone is better than being with dishonest people.,thugs and criminals.
Boy do I relate.
In Africa, we leave our children with our parents. They do the chores, run around the house, fight like like all siblings and cousins do. They learn good manners, go to church and have to come home from school. Instead of hanging around with the wrong crowd.
This helps our careers and marriages. We extent and renovate our parents houses, send money and groceries. It is a win win situation.
I miss my husband so much.
Truly sad.
You shouldn’t open the door til you know who is on the other side. Do u have a window you can look out to see who is there? 😳
I can relate. But i am a violinist and have my music.
Im 61 and have nobody , most of the time im ok whith this , if i am around in 15 years time it might be differant 🤔, my health is my friend
And if they treated u like....
Cmon - they deserve whatever cms to them.
Its a thin line between love & hate girls. Dont flip yr man around & treat him badly bcs one day ur karma will get u & yll receive what u dished out t a nice guy....
Own family are worse
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
9 out of 10 widows are women.
Ladies, you need to plan a life for yourself♥️
This is sad😢😢
Volunteer! You'll meet people.
If you have a car, deliver meals for Meals on Wheels, serve food at a homeless shelter, walk dogs at an animal shelter, watch someone's child for an hour to spell them, take a walk, volunteer at the senior center, library or community center, take an art class, teach a class at a senior center, library or community center, don't just lay there!
Some elderly find that cruises are a great solution.
SAD , THANKS YOU GOODNESS 🌟,❤️🖤💚🤎 FAMILY DAPHNE COTTON ALWAYS 💜,
btw you don't have to be elderly........