Exactly! When an unstable, chaotic environment is normal for you, it feels Wrong™️ when everything is fine. It feels like the calm before the storm, like eventually something is going to ruin everything you've worked hard to build.
Brains suck when they get into patterns and won't change, particularly unhealthy ones. Mine's been stuck with producing the wrong hormones at the wrong times for about a decade now. I'm better than I was then, but it's now just management of it for the rest of my life.
Brain: This situation is unsafe and we need to be on alert to prepare for danger. That is how we'll survive Also Brain: We're safe and THATS SUSPICIOUS AS FUCK- (love your content btw!)
It’s like when summer starts and you don’t have to take classes for 2 months but you feel that you didn’t turn in an assignment, so now your brain is worrying about school when there’s no school anymore….
@@robertgandy9792 Not exactly said but it's pretty clear that's the reason, 9-1-1 Lone Star. One character says multiple times that he gets scared when things get too good (because of his past)
Been there. I learned how to cope with situations in healthy ways and process things clearly when I was disappointed in my self but my body would still react like it did when I hated myself and was freaking out because I wasn't perfect. All a part of the healing process, but it sucks.
Had this same thing happen to me. Had a really bad panic attack over a minor mistake at work. Had been away from toxic household for years. It pushes me to get therapy. Therapist basically said “you have been repressing your trauma to survive for so long that when you got out of that situation, your brain can finally process all the trauma.”
The true beauty of your talent is that you can come off on the surface as hilarious, yet the moment a person stops to consider just what is being shown/said, they realize the sheer depth of reality you’re portraying. Praying that stability becomes your greater reality as the years progress.
As another lady with C-PTSD, you’re doing great. It takes time to let the reality of that stable environment set in, and it takes work retraining your body to recognize and accept it, but you will get there. I’m 12 years away from the time when I separated myself from my abuser and abusive situation, and I finally feel relaxed and happy more often than not. It took time for the dust to settle and to find a soft place to land… then it took time to believe in that goodness. But I feel it now. Hang in there!
I know this on a lower level. Never had a safe, stable and/or welcoming learn environment my whole school life, due to bullying and some other stuff, and now that I'm at university, suddenly I'm in a year with lots of nice people where everyone gets somewhat along and even if anyone tries to be mean, they have already 3 people in their necks calling them out. And I'm completely out of my "comfort zone" and freaking out because I don't know how to deal with the fact that actually, most of the group appreciates me for who I am. For my old strategy of "well, I am who I am, deal with it or f*** off, I don't care" doesn't really work when people say something like "Wow, what you said in today's class was really thought-through!"
One of the things I promised myself that I would do when I got to be an adult and was no longer controlled by the adults in my life as a child was I was going to get healthy I was going to make sure I was the healthiest person I could possibly be cuz I realized what I went through it really sucks to know that getting healthy is just as painful as the trauma you went through like how is that fair
Think of it like a broken bone that healed wrong. It has to be broken again and set correctly, then heal all over again. It sucks. But you’re suffering under the care of good and supportive guidance (therapist/resources/loved ones) and when you heal this time, you’ll be able to do things you couldn’t do before, feel better, and be overall better. Hang in there!
Your shorts about PTSD and abuse have helped me immensely. It reframes something that was withering my soul into something relatable that I can laugh about. I feel less alone. Thank you.
"Waiting for the other shoe to drop because everything is fine" is definitely a mood. And I hate it because you can't enjoy the moment like you should be.
Omg, I feel this so hard! Same reaction I had when I was first living on my own with a decent job and dating my now husband. It took time for my body to understand calm living!
It feels like a scam, mhm, hard agree. I think of it as being able to unpack all the baggage I was pushing down before now that it's safe to take that time and space to breathe and work through it all. It sucks. Keep at it.
Oh. So that's why I was having panic attacks over literally nothing 🙃 I didn't actually know that. I just thought that it was because I used to have constant panic attacks my body was just used to it and was recreating them to feel normal but this makes way more sense 😂😂
@@savvivixen8490 I'm actually quite grateful to know that there is a reason now why it's happening and that it's oddly positive since before it was super frustrating but now I can calm myself down with the understanding that this is a part of recovery and not my body doing dumb shit😂
Yeah this a real thing that happens (and is a sign of progress) and usually the only way to get through it is let your brain panic and freak out, keep trying to do grounding and relaxation exercises and eventually your brain should just calm down out of sheer exhaustion from being overly activated for a prolonged length of time...bad news is it'll probably take awhile because folks with histories of repeated trauma usually have a brain that is used to sustaining not-calm energy for prolonged lengths of time....but hey there's always wine and TH-cam
❤ this is one of 2 videos of yours I replay all the time. ( Aggressive caretaker is the other one ) My C-PTSD has been around since 1983 and your videos have helped me through some extremely tough times. Please make more of these if it's possible. Thank you. I don't feel alone anymore ❤❤
This is me. Comfort, presence, and calm is the most aggravating thing for me. Meanwhile, I was in a head on collision not too long ago and had to go to the hospital, and it felt like the (not so) loving embrace of home. Weird.
Truth. I remember after finally being free from The Abuser it was like the ice around my emotions melted and suddenly I had to deal with EVERYTHING I had to jam in a tiny little freezer for years all spilled out all over the place. Crazy scary at the time.
Reminds me of Steven Universe Future: since he grew up with so much bad things happening in his life (like world ending threat bad things), as an adolescent he doesn't know how to deal with normal bad situations, like his friends moving on with their lives or them not needing him anymore. It's called cortezol (or something I don't know how it's spelled), your body gets used to a certain level of stress or distress, being too used to intense fight, flight or freeze, that it doesn't know how to handle tiny amounts of it, or being at peace. I hate to say it, but at the end of the show he goes to therapy finally and moves away. I feel like you've already done that, so this is probably just another step taken in a long recovery period.
I just realized something myself, I've been in a relationship where the guy actually would talk to me, make me feel validated and not insane for loving him. Previously I was interested in someone that I just couldn't get out my head so I waited years for him and after several times of him just ghosting me and stalking me... This did a number on me.
😂😂😂😂😂😂@ "shaking chihuahua energy" SO accurate!! For real though, it's like suddenly coming to a full stop after running/driving too fast! A must read for anyone curious about the complex effects of trauma (if you don't happen to know about it already) The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk. I wish you all much love and success in your healing!😄
Don’t have your trauma but part of the reason why you’re still not entirely carefree is because when you do let yourself feel relaxed and comfortable for once sometimes that’s when bad stuff happens. That sucks, it’s part of why I’d lean more towards the pessimistic side, and idek what to do in that situation as well as yours in this video.
When you are in survival mode for so long your body is so used to generating adrenaline and working in fight or flight mode that it takes for all those chemicals to equalise. Also the uncertainty of stability. That's anxiety provoking
This actually happened to my gran. I don't know if she had PTSD (she might have), but she was a very anxious person and once she actually went into a panic because everything was fine. The fact that there was nothing to worry about actually did worry her.
This reminds me of the episode of Steven universe future where he's told that since he (as a main character of a cartoon since 13 years old) has been dealing with live and death situations his hole life, now that he has no threats of that kind, he now deals with stress of day by day like he's about to die. which result of him unconsciously activating his powers
This explains some things about myself. Although, I sometimes take it even further and see good things as bad omens. One good thing happens, three things are gonna happen soon to fuck your day up. That’s how it always seems, so the “good” stuff that happens always seems like a “SIKE!”
"Shaky chihuahua energy" is a great merch idea. Please make it, put it on everything, and let me give you my money!!! [Edited for TW: Brief mention of violence/injury] . . . . . . . . . Me, during the pandemic as a key worker (retail): Functioning on empty, but still functioning. Me, after lockdowns are over: Full scale panic, emotional breakdowns, disassociation. Me, during my work shift when two men are beating the absolute, ever loving shite out of each other (One was bleeding from his head) outside: Total calm, got work done, made sure everything was fine and was able to give a full, detailed, account for the incident report. AND covered 2 hours for a colleague after my shift with no issues. Also me, when all is relaxed, having supportive workmates, fewer work hours, the BEST partner, a secure home, financial worries to a minimum: Emotional and physical wellbeing collapses into dust. FML.
Moved to a whole other country to get out of a toxic environment (partially, there were other reasons) and now that all my dreams are coming true and the people I'm around are lovely and non-toxic, my social anxiety has started to come back. It does feel like a scam 😕
Since i know u like media that is relatable mental health wise, i suggest watching Steven Universe Future, which deals with this exact issue. The protag's powers are going out of control bc there is no danger, but any spike in cortisol leads him to acvt like he's under attack bc he spent so much of his childhood under attack.
This hits hard. I moved to 2.5 acres. Im surrounded by field and forest. Ive gone low contact with family that hurt me. I internalize my panic attacks. You dont see them on the surface I feel it and before I lose control I pass out or go to sleep. Sometimes my heart is pounding so fast while on the surface Im calm because Ive learned that if I voice that Im feeling this way it will be more problems on top of it. For example my bf of 9 years doesnt know what to do because he cant help me doesnt know what to do if I talk to him he gets overwhelmed and has nowhere to put that or a way to do something constructive with it and his instinct when stressed is to recluse not hug etc. My kiddo is a kid cant talk to her about it. I have phone therapy once a week. Idk its odd because its like there is 2 of me. One side panicking and getting overwhelmed and going through this and the other just wondering wtf is going on and feels fine. It makes me feel crazy. Its so how it goes though. My body will react to emergency situation or violence no problem but peace is unsettling somehow when all I wanted for so long was peace.
Oh, look - my inner monologue! I keep trying to brain-splain my way out of it, ‘Okay, you have no reason to be this anxious. This is you being happy & content.’ My brain, ‘Yeah?! Well, you must be new here, because that is not what we do!!’ My poor therapist.
Been there done that. You have to be really careful and not self sabotage yourself during this time. Also... If you feel like you are stuck in flight or flight mode.... Go have your hormones checked. The more stress you are under the higher your estrogen levels will go, and if they go way too high....it can cause you to end up building up pressure (like an old pressure cooker with out the release valve) until you verbally vomit on who ever is in the room with you at the time you go off. Much love to you.
Feels like that one time that I realize I was completely happy and I suddenly had a massive breakdown because I didn't know how to deal with it. Like: WTF BRAIN?
I actually brought up this video to my therapist. We were having a nice long talk about how I need, to actually relax and the conversation actually went something like this. Her: So you're doing pretty good, we're unpacking a lot of stuff, you're understanding your behaviors. Now have you tried mediation? I know it seems-" Me: Oh I know it seems like bullshit, but yeah I could see how it could help me. I just need to get over the panic." Her: ".... I'm sorry panic?" Me: "Yeah, when I try to relax and think about nothing, my body is like (WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!) and floods me with adrenalin, I know why it happens though." Her: "What? Wait you already know-" Me: (Pulls up your video.) Her: "..... Fuck she's right. Hey can you send this to me? I've got a lot of people who need this simplified."
WTF I had this after I came back from international travel (where I was argumentative and annoying) I came to this nice house on the woods peaceful and I was a ball of distilled stress
High-key a scam! Yesterday for absolutely NO REASON I was feeling stressed and on edge. Kept making sure my door was locked and stuff. Like NO REASON just panicking and feeling bad.
I love watching your videos for the Marvel commentary and Social Justice. I relate to your content in some ways and aspire to be a better person for it. But DAMN! Why is *this* so relevant!
i'm about to move into my first apartment on my own, first time away from my dad who is severely triggering and bad for my health. i'm looking forward to some peace & change, but i also know shit's about to go *down*
Living in trauma = panic
No longer living in trauma = P A N I C
"Shaky chihuahua energy"
"THIS FEELS LIKE A SCAM" istg I love her❤
Our bodies really are two-faced bitches, freaking out on us specifically because there's nothing to freak out about...
Everything is going too well. Sus
The fear of the tiger that cannot be seen, but surely is there because there always was one before.
That explains why I'm nervous when everything seems to be going well
Exactly! When an unstable, chaotic environment is normal for you, it feels Wrong™️ when everything is fine. It feels like the calm before the storm, like eventually something is going to ruin everything you've worked hard to build.
Definitely how I feel some days but there really rare and they mess with me the most
I think some of the nervousness comes from the fear, that it all going good now, but how long till it all falls apart.
@@mehnotreallymyname3888 yeah exactly! Waiting for the other shoe to drop because before it always did
Brains suck when they get into patterns and won't change, particularly unhealthy ones. Mine's been stuck with producing the wrong hormones at the wrong times for about a decade now. I'm better than I was then, but it's now just management of it for the rest of my life.
Brain: This situation is unsafe and we need to be on alert to prepare for danger. That is how we'll survive
Also Brain: We're safe and THATS SUSPICIOUS AS FUCK-
(love your content btw!)
It’s like when summer starts and you don’t have to take classes for 2 months but you feel that you didn’t turn in an assignment, so now your brain is worrying about school when there’s no school anymore….
imagine: having a panic attack over not having panic attacks 🤣🤣 yup this is very true
This explained it far better in 1 minute than the tv show I watched that had a character dealing with it lol
And what show was that
@@robertgandy9792 Not exactly said but it's pretty clear that's the reason, 9-1-1 Lone Star. One character says multiple times that he gets scared when things get too good (because of his past)
Our bodies keep the score and our nervous system needs practice recognizing a stable and relaxed state.
Been there. I learned how to cope with situations in healthy ways and process things clearly when I was disappointed in my self but my body would still react like it did when I hated myself and was freaking out because I wasn't perfect. All a part of the healing process, but it sucks.
Had this same thing happen to me. Had a really bad panic attack over a minor mistake at work. Had been away from toxic household for years. It pushes me to get therapy. Therapist basically said “you have been repressing your trauma to survive for so long that when you got out of that situation, your brain can finally process all the trauma.”
Brain: you have to stop redlining me 24/7 I'm gonna break.
Also brain: I don't know how to act unless I'm redlined, back to default I guess.
Ma’am I did not need to be exposed like this today 😂
no no that's a scam that is FOR REAL a scam
The true beauty of your talent is that you can come off on the surface as hilarious, yet the moment a person stops to consider just what is being shown/said, they realize the sheer depth of reality you’re portraying. Praying that stability becomes your greater reality as the years progress.
When too many things go right I'm on edge.
Brain: you just haven't figured out what is wrong yet
As another lady with C-PTSD, you’re doing great. It takes time to let the reality of that stable environment set in, and it takes work retraining your body to recognize and accept it, but you will get there. I’m 12 years away from the time when I separated myself from my abuser and abusive situation, and I finally feel relaxed and happy more often than not. It took time for the dust to settle and to find a soft place to land… then it took time to believe in that goodness. But I feel it now.
Hang in there!
I did not need to be called out like this.
I know this on a lower level. Never had a safe, stable and/or welcoming learn environment my whole school life, due to bullying and some other stuff, and now that I'm at university, suddenly I'm in a year with lots of nice people where everyone gets somewhat along and even if anyone tries to be mean, they have already 3 people in their necks calling them out. And I'm completely out of my "comfort zone" and freaking out because I don't know how to deal with the fact that actually, most of the group appreciates me for who I am. For my old strategy of "well, I am who I am, deal with it or f*** off, I don't care" doesn't really work when people say something like "Wow, what you said in today's class was really thought-through!"
I did not ask to be called out like this this early in the day
One of the things I promised myself that I would do when I got to be an adult and was no longer controlled by the adults in my life as a child was I was going to get healthy I was going to make sure I was the healthiest person I could possibly be cuz I realized what I went through it really sucks to know that getting healthy is just as painful as the trauma you went through like how is that fair
Think of it like a broken bone that healed wrong. It has to be broken again and set correctly, then heal all over again.
It sucks. But you’re suffering under the care of good and supportive guidance (therapist/resources/loved ones) and when you heal this time, you’ll be able to do things you couldn’t do before, feel better, and be overall better. Hang in there!
Your shorts about PTSD and abuse have helped me immensely. It reframes something that was withering my soul into something relatable that I can laugh about. I feel less alone. Thank you.
"Waiting for the other shoe to drop because everything is fine" is definitely a mood. And I hate it because you can't enjoy the moment like you should be.
Omg, I feel this so hard! Same reaction I had when I was first living on my own with a decent job and dating my now husband. It took time for my body to understand calm living!
The joys (and confusion) of mental illness 😄😂😭
It feels like a scam, mhm, hard agree. I think of it as being able to unpack all the baggage I was pushing down before now that it's safe to take that time and space to breathe and work through it all. It sucks. Keep at it.
OMG, Nicque! I love you! This is exactly what's happening in my brain right now. And now I know why too. Thank you.
That reminds me of Steven Universe Future when Connie's mom explained it. I didn't realize that can actually happen irl.
Oh. So that's why I was having panic attacks over literally nothing 🙃 I didn't actually know that. I just thought that it was because I used to have constant panic attacks my body was just used to it and was recreating them to feel normal but this makes way more sense 😂😂
Seems you weren't entirely wrong tho. Just worked the answer from the other end. Good job.
@@savvivixen8490 I'm actually quite grateful to know that there is a reason now why it's happening and that it's oddly positive since before it was super frustrating but now I can calm myself down with the understanding that this is a part of recovery and not my body doing dumb shit😂
@@LunaBeth97 I meeeeean!!!
…..yeah……just got this diagnosis last week…….I’m fine….
Or are you dissociating? Because I don’t tend to react to anything and that’s because I’m forcing myself to be numb.
It’s like always being on guard so you don’t have to experience more trauma than you already do
Totally relatable, except for how competent your therapist is.
This is basically the episode in Steven universe future where he goes to the the doctor, practically the same diagnosis
therapist are bruattly honest sometimes but they help! :)
Totally relate to having anxiety over the lack of panic attacks. And not feeling okay when things are fine.
"The process of healing is usually at least twice as bad as the trauma itself." -- my therapist ruining my day
Yeah this a real thing that happens (and is a sign of progress) and usually the only way to get through it is let your brain panic and freak out, keep trying to do grounding and relaxation exercises and eventually your brain should just calm down out of sheer exhaustion from being overly activated for a prolonged length of time...bad news is it'll probably take awhile because folks with histories of repeated trauma usually have a brain that is used to sustaining not-calm energy for prolonged lengths of time....but hey there's always wine and TH-cam
Yep. I've broken down crying when something went well and wasn't traumatic because I didn't know how to deal
"I don't watch Endgame nearly as much as I used to-"
I feel so seen.
This is so very much the experience of therapy with CPTSD. I feel you.
Right? I have the anxiety like I am being hunted when things are fine and I am happy.
Omg this is how I feel! It's kinda nice to know other people feel this way. I thought I was a weirdo
You have perfectly explained one of the most confusing and distressing parts of my brain in less than 90 seconds
That would explain a lot of my unwarranted anxiety...
❤ this is one of 2 videos of yours I replay all the time. ( Aggressive caretaker is the other one ) My C-PTSD has been around since 1983 and your videos have helped me through some extremely tough times. Please make more of these if it's possible. Thank you. I don't feel alone anymore ❤❤
I'm so glad you are finally at peace, that your mind and body are finally resting. That you feel safe and warm 💚
We came for the laughs but stayed for the free second hand therapy.
PTSD the gift that keeps on giving.
I have panic attacks once in awhile, but to actually have where I am stable with nothing to worry about it’s a fantasy or a scam lol 😂🤣🤣
This is me. Comfort, presence, and calm is the most aggravating thing for me. Meanwhile, I was in a head on collision not too long ago and had to go to the hospital, and it felt like the (not so) loving embrace of home. Weird.
“shaky chihuahua energy”
Truth.
I remember after finally being free from The Abuser it was like the ice around my emotions melted and suddenly I had to deal with EVERYTHING I had to jam in a tiny little freezer for years all spilled out all over the place. Crazy scary at the time.
For me its more like "everything is great and nothing is going wrong- THATS A RED FLAG IT MEANS SOMETHING IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN-!" Yeah 😂
Reminds me of Steven Universe Future: since he grew up with so much bad things happening in his life (like world ending threat bad things), as an adolescent he doesn't know how to deal with normal bad situations, like his friends moving on with their lives or them not needing him anymore. It's called cortezol (or something I don't know how it's spelled), your body gets used to a certain level of stress or distress, being too used to intense fight, flight or freeze, that it doesn't know how to handle tiny amounts of it, or being at peace. I hate to say it, but at the end of the show he goes to therapy finally and moves away. I feel like you've already done that, so this is probably just another step taken in a long recovery period.
I just realized something myself, I've been in a relationship where the guy actually would talk to me, make me feel validated and not insane for loving him.
Previously I was interested in someone that I just couldn't get out my head so I waited years for him and after several times of him just ghosting me and stalking me... This did a number on me.
😂😂😂😂😂😂@ "shaking chihuahua energy" SO accurate!! For real though, it's like suddenly coming to a full stop after running/driving too fast! A must read for anyone curious about the complex effects of trauma (if you don't happen to know about it already) The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk. I wish you all much love and success in your healing!😄
Don’t have your trauma but part of the reason why you’re still not entirely carefree is because when you do let yourself feel relaxed and comfortable for once sometimes that’s when bad stuff happens. That sucks, it’s part of why I’d lean more towards the pessimistic side, and idek what to do in that situation as well as yours in this video.
Nicque, you did not have to call me out like that 💀
When you are in survival mode for so long your body is so used to generating adrenaline and working in fight or flight mode that it takes for all those chemicals to equalise. Also the uncertainty of stability. That's anxiety provoking
This actually happened to my gran. I don't know if she had PTSD (she might have), but she was a very anxious person and once she actually went into a panic because everything was fine. The fact that there was nothing to worry about actually did worry her.
Dealt with this in a therapy session a month ago now and still dealing with it.
Literally me after I left my toxic friendship and then got an amazing stable one
Imagine if nicque signed up for a no trauma , no panic mental contract ONLY TO KNOW she suffers anyway. Boy is life fucked .
This is me rn. First time I’ve felt stable in 13 years and I’m so on edge.
This reminds me of the episode of Steven universe future where he's told that since he (as a main character of a cartoon since 13 years old) has been dealing with live and death situations his hole life, now that he has no threats of that kind, he now deals with stress of day by day like he's about to die. which result of him unconsciously activating his powers
This explains some things about myself. Although, I sometimes take it even further and see good things as bad omens. One good thing happens, three things are gonna happen soon to fuck your day up. That’s how it always seems, so the “good” stuff that happens always seems like a “SIKE!”
This reminds me of that song "My Mind is Playing Tricks On Me"
"Shaky chihuahua energy" is a great merch idea. Please make it, put it on everything, and let me give you my money!!!
[Edited for TW: Brief mention of violence/injury]
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Me, during the pandemic as a key worker (retail): Functioning on empty, but still functioning.
Me, after lockdowns are over: Full scale panic, emotional breakdowns, disassociation.
Me, during my work shift when two men are beating the absolute, ever loving shite out of each other (One was bleeding from his head) outside: Total calm, got work done, made sure everything was fine and was able to give a full, detailed, account for the incident report. AND covered 2 hours for a colleague after my shift with no issues.
Also me, when all is relaxed, having supportive workmates, fewer work hours, the BEST partner, a secure home, financial worries to a minimum: Emotional and physical wellbeing collapses into dust.
FML.
Our own psychosis is an abusive boyfriend.
That's funny, Nicque!!! As usual, thank you for putting that in perspective for me 💗💗💗💗💗
LOVE you!
Moved to a whole other country to get out of a toxic environment (partially, there were other reasons) and now that all my dreams are coming true and the people I'm around are lovely and non-toxic, my social anxiety has started to come back. It does feel like a scam 😕
Since i know u like media that is relatable mental health wise, i suggest watching Steven Universe Future, which deals with this exact issue. The protag's powers are going out of control bc there is no danger, but any spike in cortisol leads him to acvt like he's under attack bc he spent so much of his childhood under attack.
This hits hard. I moved to 2.5 acres. Im surrounded by field and forest. Ive gone low contact with family that hurt me. I internalize my panic attacks. You dont see them on the surface I feel it and before I lose control I pass out or go to sleep. Sometimes my heart is pounding so fast while on the surface Im calm because Ive learned that if I voice that Im feeling this way it will be more problems on top of it. For example my bf of 9 years doesnt know what to do because he cant help me doesnt know what to do if I talk to him he gets overwhelmed and has nowhere to put that or a way to do something constructive with it and his instinct when stressed is to recluse not hug etc. My kiddo is a kid cant talk to her about it. I have phone therapy once a week. Idk its odd because its like there is 2 of me. One side panicking and getting overwhelmed and going through this and the other just wondering wtf is going on and feels fine. It makes me feel crazy.
Its so how it goes though. My body will react to emergency situation or violence no problem but peace is unsettling somehow when all I wanted for so long was peace.
So that’s why when everything in my life is going well I start subconsciously sabotaging myself so I’m late for work
I JUST HAD THIS CONVERSATION WITH MY THERAPIST!!!!🤣🤣🤣
I just came this realization in my life, so do I just tell my brain to chill out or get a bonsai tree.
Soooo that's what's happening to me. Thank you for ur informative and funny info u put out
This....explains....my life....SO MUCH!!! IT HURTS!!! BUT WHY IS IT SO TRUE!?!?! 🤣😱😭
I'm probably going to be diagnosed with C-PTSD when I'm older due to my own parental trauma, and this doesn't look promising-
i don’t and can’t trust anything lmao it’s great i’m scared of not being scared
*Life going well, nothing to worry about*
My brain: Well, this is completely wrong!
They touched on this in Steven Universe
Lol this is absolutely what's happening in my brain everything I've worked towards I'm finally on last step and I'm freaking out. 😅
Oh, look - my inner monologue!
I keep trying to brain-splain my way out of it, ‘Okay, you have no reason to be this anxious. This is you being happy & content.’
My brain, ‘Yeah?! Well, you must be new here, because that is not what we do!!’
My poor therapist.
uhoh- this one was too relatable-
Been there done that. You have to be really careful and not self sabotage yourself during this time. Also... If you feel like you are stuck in flight or flight mode.... Go have your hormones checked. The more stress you are under the higher your estrogen levels will go, and if they go way too high....it can cause you to end up building up pressure (like an old pressure cooker with out the release valve) until you verbally vomit on who ever is in the room with you at the time you go off.
Much love to you.
Feels like that one time that I realize I was completely happy and I suddenly had a massive breakdown because I didn't know how to deal with it. Like: WTF BRAIN?
I ended up in the hospital cause the panic attacks and it was just this!!
I actually brought up this video to my therapist. We were having a nice long talk about how I need, to actually relax and the conversation actually went something like this.
Her: So you're doing pretty good, we're unpacking a lot of stuff, you're understanding your behaviors. Now have you tried mediation? I know it seems-"
Me: Oh I know it seems like bullshit, but yeah I could see how it could help me. I just need to get over the panic."
Her: ".... I'm sorry panic?"
Me: "Yeah, when I try to relax and think about nothing, my body is like (WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!) and floods me with adrenalin, I know why it happens though."
Her: "What? Wait you already know-"
Me: (Pulls up your video.)
Her: "..... Fuck she's right. Hey can you send this to me? I've got a lot of people who need this simplified."
WTF I had this after I came back from international travel (where I was argumentative and annoying) I came to this nice house on the woods peaceful and I was a ball of distilled stress
Congratulations, for getting back the6
I remember that day in therapy!! Weed helps me today 😂
This spoke to my soul
I felt this in my bones
High-key a scam!
Yesterday for absolutely NO REASON I was feeling stressed and on edge. Kept making sure my door was locked and stuff. Like NO REASON just panicking and feeling bad.
I love watching your videos for the Marvel commentary and Social Justice. I relate to your content in some ways and aspire to be a better person for it. But DAMN! Why is *this* so relevant!
My brain does that sometimes even though I don't have any mental disorders my mind still wants me to suffer. Why must you attack me brain?!
LMAO! It's funny cuz it's true. I find that I've been experiencing a lot of the same this past year. 🤦🏾♀️
i'm about to move into my first apartment on my own, first time away from my dad who is severely triggering and bad for my health. i'm looking forward to some peace & change, but i also know shit's about to go *down*
YEP, the brain is a scam. "you want to be happy? TOO BAD. Let me list all the crap you need to be worrying about RN" -My brain daily