Watch This Before You Get Top Surgery // w/ Ash Hardell

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 12 มิ.ย. 2024
  • What to pack, how to deal with post-surgical depression, how the process differs if you’re not on testosterone, and more things to consider when preparing for top surgery.
    Video on Ash’s channel about gender euphoria! • gender euphoria.
    Video with Grace on Ash and Grace Space • How To Choose Your Nam...
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ความคิดเห็น • 588

  • @Paulinemoke
    @Paulinemoke 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1523

    There was a Bra ad on this video - Go Home YT, you‘re drunk.

    • @bryntendo
      @bryntendo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      Pauline Lol, the advertising algorithm is so damn weird. It's like it searches for keywords but doesn't take context into account at all, so a video about 'chest/breasts/boobs/whatever' will get random breast related ads even if it's the absolute opposite of what the video is about 😂 Like, I'm vegan and I have a lot of rescue chickens that I absolutely adore beyond belief, they're my pets, feather puppies, mini dinobirds, my floofbutts! I can post something on Instagram about my floofs and even use hashtags like #friendsnotfood #vegan #crueltyfreeliving etc, then open the app (or FB or YT or whatever else) soon after and find all these targeted ads for like, KFC and Wingblaster Fried chicken or Yardbird beer music and chicken wings joint... Targeted advertising *_FAIL!!_* Hahaha. I know that Google's algorithms can account for context to target an individual user so acutely that they can advertise baby stuff to someone before they themselves have even realized they're pregnant, so how the hell do they keep getting it so wrong as to advertise sexy bras on a top surgery video or fried chicken restaurants to a vegan person who just said that they would never eat chickens because chickens are their pets?? I swear they're not even trying anymore lol

    • @scouttyra
      @scouttyra 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      I had an ad for a company that makes feminine hygiene products (pads, pantyliners, intimate wash(?) and wipes, etc.).

    • @mzanahenriques
      @mzanahenriques 5 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      TH-cam algorythim picks up the words "top" and "breast" or "chest" and decides someone needs a bra LMAO

    • @gorillaau
      @gorillaau 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      I am getting an advert for workplace injury lawyer. Shoot, what type of workplace injury requires top surgery.

    • @topangaleija
      @topangaleija 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@bryntendo yo yo fellow vegan :D

  • @Fletcherrr94
    @Fletcherrr94 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1212

    Isnt it REAL WEIRD that in society boobs arnt aloud to be on display in public.. but then after top surgery the very same skin is totally fine for all to look at, even though the only thing that has changed is INSIDE THE BODY.. Like same skin, same nips, just no breast tissue INSIDE.
    Totally skrews with my head when you REALLYY THINK ABOUT IT :/

    • @nikolaipetrichor2065
      @nikolaipetrichor2065 5 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      Ya, it definitely is weird...

    • @PixieQuin
      @PixieQuin 5 ปีที่แล้ว +186

      that's sexism babe

    • @zinniaward8549
      @zinniaward8549 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Oh yeah......

    • @bug12435
      @bug12435 5 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      It's weird to think that's still a thing in the states. In canada some provinces it's legal to go topless in public.

    • @doubleboy2388
      @doubleboy2388 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      It's just the way it is. People, mostly men are sexually aroused by women's breasts. There's just something attractive about them. When you remove them, then there is nothing.

  • @littlecornmuffin3338
    @littlecornmuffin3338 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1451

    I'm literally 12 hours away from top surgery. I feel like I'm cramming for a test; marathoning all these videos.

    • @sandrajohansson9578
      @sandrajohansson9578 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      1 month after, do you feel good?

    • @Wades228
      @Wades228 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      I’m getting top surgery in December this year, do you have any tips from your recovery?

    • @littlecornmuffin3338
      @littlecornmuffin3338 4 ปีที่แล้ว +116

      @@Wades228 Honestly my recovery was really easy. But really prepare for the fact that pulling up ur pants after using the bathroom is gonna be really hard. Definitely something I did not expect. Also, find a way to make yourself comfy sleeping exclusively on your back. I slept very little that first week because I am *not* a back sleeper. Uh, have a comfy chair so that you can sit up some times and get loads of books and movies you like. I hope this helped? If you have any more specific questions feel free to ask!

    • @elijah8018
      @elijah8018 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      LittleCornMuffin my surgery is about 2 weeks away. How was the pain and managing it?

    • @Wades228
      @Wades228 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @LittleCornMuffin thanks for the advice! I’m not a back sleeper as well so I’ll do my best to try and make myself like a nest of pillows or something, I’ll try and figure that one out. I was planning on my friends recommending books and just getting stacks of those to read. Also I was wondering what it was like with the drains in and what it was like removing them? That is what gives me the most anxiety in the world about top surgery, the drains. The evil looking drains

  • @thegoblinundertheporch351
    @thegoblinundertheporch351 4 ปีที่แล้ว +359

    “Before I even knew I wanted top surgery I wanted a breast reduction” damn, they are hard core making a lot of sense rn

    • @BlahBlah-cm1os
      @BlahBlah-cm1os 3 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      Oh my god, I remember seeing double mastectomy scars from cancer patients and thinking 'i wouldn't mind that.' I'm done trying to convince myself that it's a phase or that I've never had dysphoria. 😂

    • @Sunny-gy3jv
      @Sunny-gy3jv 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Blah Blah same

    • @np-cos4065
      @np-cos4065 3 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Same, even before I knew I was genderfluid. Before I knew I had dysphoria. Before I knew just how much I hated my breasts, I've always wanted to get some sort of breast reduction or something to get rid of them lmao.

    • @uhnyluh
      @uhnyluh 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      this just hit me like a TRUCK

    • @tym8792
      @tym8792 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Right my mom got Brest reduction when I was around 10 or 11 and I wanted it then so ik it was telling me some🤣💯

  • @caliigrey
    @caliigrey 4 ปีที่แล้ว +833

    *"pineapple before, during and after [top surgery]"*
    "yeah doc, special request, but as you're performing the surgery i'll need you to literally feed pineapple to my unconscious body, thanks"

    • @caliigrey
      @caliigrey 4 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      before anyone yells at me im joking thanks

    • @IceKreacher
      @IceKreacher 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      kay ʕ ꈍᴥꈍʔ I laughed so hard at this

    • @l0v3.pr3tty.b0y
      @l0v3.pr3tty.b0y 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      lmao

    • @leoslemons8382
      @leoslemons8382 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      kay ʕ ꈍᴥꈍʔ lol

    • @charevandenheever4460
      @charevandenheever4460 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Lmao I love that

  • @ben1301
    @ben1301 5 ปีที่แล้ว +674

    I think I would walk around shirtless all day after top surgery lol

    • @kartermeijer6813
      @kartermeijer6813 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Honestly I want to make a cosplay coat (Mollymauk Tealeaf's coat of you're familiar) and just run around, only wearing that

    • @emocrybaby
      @emocrybaby 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      To be honest I think I would do that too

    • @kittycatdays8719
      @kittycatdays8719 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yessss

    • @Connorsedols2002
      @Connorsedols2002 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Me too!

    • @dedboidamien515
      @dedboidamien515 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Same honestly.

  • @donnajocatlady3839
    @donnajocatlady3839 4 ปีที่แล้ว +261

    I'm not trans, I just DESPISE the DD globs of fat that hang off my chest. I'm 50 and happy to be a Grandma🤗🤗🤗, so I'm not on T or anything. I fight the accursed chin hair daily. 🤣But these THINGS have been the bane of my existence for years. They interfere with everything. I happily intend to be single for the rest of my days, but I want to be able to look in the mirror and buy clothes without hating myself... This is great info, guys! Thank you!!! 🤗🤗🤗

    • @mudmudmud7007
      @mudmudmud7007 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @Emmy stop being cringe and mind your business

    • @justme-dm7sb
      @justme-dm7sb 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Ha! I know that feeling. These things in the way of everything I do are one of the most annoying things ever !

    • @thelemondropgirl2140
      @thelemondropgirl2140 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Good for you :-)

    • @LadyIarConnacht
      @LadyIarConnacht 18 วันที่ผ่านมา

      And yet because we're not "trans" we aren't allowed to do anything about it - unless we get cancer. Then it's OK.

  • @yourlocalcryptid6024
    @yourlocalcryptid6024 5 ปีที่แล้ว +411

    If this was a tv show: "Get Titless."

    • @bingobongo9353
      @bingobongo9353 4 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      *Scared Titless*

    • @np-cos4065
      @np-cos4065 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@bingobongo9353 OHHHHH THAT'S A GOOD ONE

    • @bjasshjaskjdhkasj
      @bjasshjaskjdhkasj 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      TITLESS HAHAHHA

    • @ediblecactus5703
      @ediblecactus5703 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's called gender disforforia people. Clowns 🤡 who are actually afraid to be a woman are exactly the kind of women that the good men out there in this world will never even consider dating.

  • @omnipossum92
    @omnipossum92 5 ปีที่แล้ว +252

    I was at a non-binary meeting (despite being like 95% binary) and one person said they wanted to still wear sports bras after top surgery because they liked wearing a contrasting colours under tank tops.

    • @marshall.klecuyer
      @marshall.klecuyer 4 ปีที่แล้ว +72

      thats fASHIOM babEE

    • @IceKreacher
      @IceKreacher 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Sure. I can see that. It can totally be a fashion accessory.

    • @v0id_d3m0n
      @v0id_d3m0n 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Fair. Also what up with that 95%? That is really not it...

    • @straberryshinigami15g97
      @straberryshinigami15g97 ปีที่แล้ว

      what do you mean 95% binary? if youre nonbinary youre nonbinary, no matter how you look.

    • @omnipossum92
      @omnipossum92 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@v0id_d3m0n I guess more like binary but a little nonconformist

  • @zabecartowsky4724
    @zabecartowsky4724 2 ปีที่แล้ว +109

    Thank you! I am non binary, not on T and I will be having top surgery in a month. I am 65 and started talking to doctors about surgery 35 years ago. Then people were trans or got breast reduction, which I knew I didn't want.
    I changed my name 31 years ago so this feels like the final step in becoming my authentic non binary self. I think it is so great that you don't have to wait as long as I did.
    Thank you for being out there. I don't feel alone anymore.

    • @eveedgarlopez
      @eveedgarlopez ปีที่แล้ว +9

      That's wholesome! It must have been hard to grow up non binary back then... How did the surgery go?

    • @Qwertygerty123
      @Qwertygerty123 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I usually post and say NOOOO. However at 65, I say go for it.

    • @diederdas27
      @diederdas27 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      @@Qwertygerty123what… what are you talking about…

    • @Qwertygerty123
      @Qwertygerty123 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@diederdas27 Pretty sure it isn’t that complicated to understand what I said. If you’re entitled to an opinion surely I am too.

    • @foxythecutefox2564
      @foxythecutefox2564 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@diederdas27I think they’re referring to the younger generations

  • @HeyThere005
    @HeyThere005 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1019

    This was so lovely! This talk really helped me prepare 💗💗💗

    • @klcoult5746
      @klcoult5746 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I love you ash!! And can I also just say, YOU LOOK GREATTTT 😊😊

    • @nikhansen8775
      @nikhansen8775 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I am so happy for you! Thank you for sharing your story

    • @plowie6370
      @plowie6370 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Wow, I forgot you used to have boobs haha, Love you ash thank you for your all support, you are the only thing that gets me through each day 🏳️‍🌈🖤

    • @laurenelysewalters
      @laurenelysewalters 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      are there any non-binary AMAB's who choose to get implants/estrogen that you know of?

    • @soldiaz7261
      @soldiaz7261 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      YOU GO PAL!!! We love you

  • @dontworryimfine1859
    @dontworryimfine1859 5 ปีที่แล้ว +103

    I wore a cut off shirt that showed my scar on my sides to pride a few months after my surgery and immediately got ask if I had cancer. The person herself had had a mastectomy so that's why she asked but it was so discouraging especially at pride.

    • @pearlpearl3806
      @pearlpearl3806 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Imagine how discouraged she felt thinking she met someone who would relate to a traumatic battle she went through but instead someone who voluntarily chose to undergo major surgery

    • @dontworryimfine1859
      @dontworryimfine1859 2 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      I don't normally engage with obvious transphobic people online but I genuinely don't care about anything you have to say after this and it's my day off so let's get into it.
      The lesbian who had came up to me to ask if I was also a survivor and I had a short but lovely and heartfelt conversation when I explained my situation. She congratulated me on my results, we commiserated over the length of our scars and she gave me tips on what to expect next while my chest continued healing. She, unlike you both, was not a transphobic POS.
      It was discouraging, not because I got misidentified as a cancer survivor or even as a girl. It was discouraging because I was excited and most likely had unrealistic expectations for the event. It was discouraging because I was at the very beginning of my transition and wanted my first pride post surgery to be perfect. But I forgot pride is never perfect because nothing ever is. I don't and would never blame that person for coming up to me.
      So with all due respect, get tf off my replies.

    • @pearlpearl3806
      @pearlpearl3806 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@dontworryimfine1859 sorry that an average person with normal empathy would read your story and commiserate more with a cancer survivor. You’re very self absorbed

    • @bjasshjaskjdhkasj
      @bjasshjaskjdhkasj 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@pearlpearl3806 Read over your comments again and tell me from an unbiased position that you're not being insensitive. You genuinely look absurd and like a fool. Grow up.

    • @Schnort
      @Schnort 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      @@pearlpearl3806 I mean, the cancer patient had to willingly sign a paper to get their boobs removed, too. They can't do that without permission.
      By that logic, both people are terrible for willingly getting their boobs chopped off. That doesn't make sense.

  • @makenzileg
    @makenzileg 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Revisiting this video now that I'm FINALLY getting surgery in two weeks after being out for 7 years!

    • @lovealexander
      @lovealexander 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Proud of you!!!

    • @Veiledgnu
      @Veiledgnu 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I’m proud of you! You’re very strong!

  • @gaymer5272
    @gaymer5272 4 ปีที่แล้ว +271

    Me
    *has hated my chest since it started developing *
    *does research 7 years later if I can chop em off*
    *finds this*
    •o•

  • @Matt-cu7fv
    @Matt-cu7fv 5 ปีที่แล้ว +138

    This really helped. Even though it can trigger dysphoria, it helps to hear people talk about their own dysphoria because when you say ( x, y or z but this thing helped me see it differently) I go “well huh, thats a great way of looking at it”.
    The thing about both of you talking about peri vs double incision really helped ease my worries about the same thing. But even if I don’t qualify for it, I know so many others relate and I’m not alone

  • @khaxjc1
    @khaxjc1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +120

    I thought the pronouns were printed on Ash's shirt. I didn't realize they were pins. I love that idea! I love it so much I was distracted thinking about it instead of watching lol. Than you said "body painting party" and a whole new distraction grabbed hold of me.
    Thank you both for sharing your experiences and thoughts with us in making and sharing these collabs and all your content.

  • @bryntendo
    @bryntendo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    The neck pillow thing is so real. I actually found it best to have 3 neck pillows, because they were perfect for keeping my arms in a comfy position whilst having to lie and sleep in an almost seated position for like a fortnight. Having the pillows stacked up so that my back, head, and chest were in the correct position made my arms just kinda dangle down by my sides in an uncomfortable way that hurt my back, pulled at my incisions, and made my drains feel even more annoying. So sticking a curved neck pillow under each arm was an absolute godsend in allowing me to just rest comfortably and in a good healing position, while not putting any strain on my chest/arms/upper body at all, and still leaving room for my drains to not get smooshed between my body and a pillow hahaha. Neck pillows _neck pillows_ *_neck pillows!_* Don't underestimate the power of pillows when recovering from top surgery!

  • @themousoleum
    @themousoleum 4 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    I found this video as a resource for being non-binary and interested in top surgery. I'm super feminine, I absolutely do not want to go on T, but I've always wanted top surgery and am currently trying to navigate through getting the resources necessary to receive a diagnosis so I can *one day* be considered as a candidate for surgery.
    Seeing an open and positive dialogue between someone who is binary and non was incredibly helpful and I feel a lot more prepared when it comes to my expectations. Thank you both for doing this! 🥰

    • @Rowan.Evander
      @Rowan.Evander 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'm in a really similar place. I enjoy looking super feminine, don't want to go on T, but at the same time I'm worried I won't be able to get the resources to receive a diagnosis as a result. I hope you were able to get what you needed friend!

    • @khmanuel
      @khmanuel ปีที่แล้ว

      This is two young women talking about sexually mutilating themselves.

    • @straberryshinigami15g97
      @straberryshinigami15g97 ปีที่แล้ว

      jsuk, you can be fem and on T!

  • @finn7435
    @finn7435 5 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    I've totally had the thought that if I ever get top surgery, that I might occasionally where sports bras still, so hearing Ash say that made me excited!

  • @ittybittyrampagingcommittee
    @ittybittyrampagingcommittee 5 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    I'm not getting top surgery for another 8-ish months in May 2019, but I'm still preparing every day, mostly by getting pumped about it.

    • @marshall.klecuyer
      @marshall.klecuyer 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      you have gotten top surgery by the time im commenting this so.. HOWS IT FEEL

    • @tym8792
      @tym8792 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      How did the surgery go bro

  • @1wanderingpoet
    @1wanderingpoet 5 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    I'm non-binary (but on T) and after 3 years of waiting I'm having top surgery in 8 days. I've watched so many top surgery videos, but this was the first that addressed the emotional experience of having a part of my body removed, even if it's something I want to have done to me... it's still a shock. And the idea to write myself a letter for after. I know I'll go to sleep and will be the same person when I wake up, but my body will change. And this experience will also change me over time. I'll never be able to come back to the body I have now (unless I had another surgery?) or not this exact body. Good job warning about the dysphoria about other body parts, I'll be prepared for that and any sadness that might come after. It's such an exciting thing, people don't think that they'll feel sad.

  • @haydenroth6990
    @haydenroth6990 5 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    OH MY GOD THEY HAVE AN ANTI-NAUSEA THING?!?! That is one of the main things I was worried about...I have a huge fear of throwing up. Like it's not even funny it's ruining my life. It's gotten better but a lot of the time I'm thinking about throwing up and not throwing up and purposely avoiding not touching things, etc. To try not the throw up. So thanks for the info! :)

    • @jackisnotabird
      @jackisnotabird  5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      I was still very nauseated, even with it, but I didn’t throw up. A nurse fed me ice chips for a while and then I felt all better.

    • @Inseut
      @Inseut 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      SAME, i have a really bad emetophobia ): that's the only thing that scares me about top surgery (or any kind of surgery)

    • @emiliahartman8264
      @emiliahartman8264 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I'm also emetophobic and so scared of top surgery for that reason >///< I have a lot of friends who have had the surgery and did not experience much nausea and definitely none of them threw up. So that's good news for us!!

    • @IceKreacher
      @IceKreacher 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same. I think I have a phobia of vomiting.

    • @theok3646
      @theok3646 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m exactly the same

  • @president-owen6267
    @president-owen6267 5 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    I'm proud of anyone with scars because they have made a huge step in their journey of loving themselves

    • @ediblecactus5703
      @ediblecactus5703 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's called gender disforforia people. Clowns 🤡 who are actually afraid to be a woman are exactly the kind of women that the good men out there in this world will never even consider dating.

  • @juleronitz5100
    @juleronitz5100 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I am rewatching this three month after my top surgery and this notion about "look post op depression in the eye and take it on (and maybe write a letter to yourself beforehand)" really stuck with me since I first watched this video. And of course I don't know how I would have felt without preparing for post op depression. But I am really thankful for having it on my mind and being ready for it. And then it never came.

  • @MalfoyIsOurKing
    @MalfoyIsOurKing 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

    i love hearing how you prepared yourself emotionally for top surgery. i feel like the emotional toll of such a big surgery isn't talked about nearly enough so i'm so glad when i hear people bringing it to the forefront. yes top surgery is common but it's such a big deal and it's a lot to go through so having complex or even conflicting thoughts or feelings about it is ok!
    great work y'all!

  • @andycole3729
    @andycole3729 5 ปีที่แล้ว +140

    Ooh yay the hates not here yet

  • @srthr6984
    @srthr6984 5 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    Thank you so much for making this guys. I've just came out as non-binary and hope to get a chest binder one day. My end goal is top surgery eventually. This has helped so much, even just thinking about binding.

    • @ediblecactus5703
      @ediblecactus5703 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That's called gender disforforia people. Clowns 🤡 who are actually afraid to be a woman are exactly the kind of women that the good men out there in this world will never even consider dating.

  • @LaRana2315
    @LaRana2315 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    It makes me happy as an enby person to know I'm not the only one who likes their curves. I wanna get top surgery bc I'm SUPER dysphoric about my chest but I actually like how curvy n big my hips and butt are. In MY mind, having a curvy bottom half and flat top half will help with me looking more 'androgynous' and comfortable in my body.

    • @Kagomai15
      @Kagomai15 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Yesss I'm the same! And I like what's in my pants already 😂

  • @jamiebisson2752
    @jamiebisson2752 5 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    This video is a very big part of why I was able to accept that I am trans. Part of the reason I fought against the trans label was because I thought my Androgen Insensitivity Syndrome meant I couldn't transition. So finding out that I could get top surgery without T allowed me to finally apply the word transgender to myself. Of course some research showed that I have Partial AIS and can go on T, but until I could accept the trans label and come out, I didn't bother with that research.

  • @PeoplepersonOG
    @PeoplepersonOG 5 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    I'm not considering top surgery, and I'm not trans or non-binary but I love this two human beings so much that I watched the whole thing

  • @megggggg8437
    @megggggg8437 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    You and Ash both individually helped me to love myself over the years, so whenever you two collab I become inappropriately euphoric. Seriously, you're both the best!

  • @lightning2367
    @lightning2367 5 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    Always love information about top surgery

  • @Rowan.Evander
    @Rowan.Evander 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Watching this as a nonbinary person in 2020 gives me hope that maybe I'll finally be able to get top surgery one day.

  • @juliancairns5885
    @juliancairns5885 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    15:00 this is very funny because I saw Ash and Grayson at the PTWC after Ash got her top surgery and they we're so excited to be like "look at my chest!! I can show you this now!!" and it was really heartwarming and adorable to see him so happy.

  • @JaspersSpace
    @JaspersSpace ปีที่แล้ว +2

    2 months from top surgery and binging all these videos!!!

  • @aliselman3834
    @aliselman3834 5 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    Two of my favs! 😍 I really hope I can get top surgery one day 🙌

  • @unspokenvoices3399
    @unspokenvoices3399 5 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    Thank you for filming this ! This truly helped me in some of the questions and concerns I had for when I have top surgery in the future.Definitely gonna reference back to this video.Two of my favs ☺️💕 love you two so much and you’re big inspirations xoxo

  • @b1u3anima69
    @b1u3anima69 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I have top surgery in 6 days I'm super excited but also pretty nervous but I'm glad I have videos like these to help me prepare

  • @imahorse4ever
    @imahorse4ever 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Also, with the family thing!! Obviously my family hasn’t seen me naked since I was a baby, and since I was an H cup pre-op I covered myself with lots of layers of clothes so family, friends and strangers couldn’t see I had massive lumps on my chest. The second I got my reveal at my one week post op I was sharing the pictures with all my family (close family that is, don’t wanna give my nan a heart attack!), it’s such a weird sensation to overcome.
    I started growing breasts at 8 and so I haven’t been shirtless around anyone since then, and now I can sit in my post op binder with no shirt on (and when I’m cleaning my chest it’s total 100% shirtless-ness) and it takes some getting used to.
    I remember just sitting with my mum the other day watching tv while in my post op binder and I got the biggest hit of panic because “SHIT, WHY DONT I HAVE A SHIRT ON?!”, and took me a few seconds to remember that “wait! they’re gone! aha!”

  • @niko9603
    @niko9603 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I dont think i even want a "male" chest, I just want a chest where i dont hve to care abt covering it up

  • @galaxyreach8168
    @galaxyreach8168 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I'm genderfluid, not sure if I need hormones, and need top surgery. This makes me feel a lot better about where I am right now, and more confident in advocating for myself and what I need. Thank you

  • @nancypeteja6560
    @nancypeteja6560 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Question: Have you ever thought of getting a tattoo to cover the scars? I mean the kind that blend with your skin, not a design. (Have heard that there are tattoo artists that actually do this over scars or create nipples for mastectomy patients. Just curious.

  • @morganbussey2571
    @morganbussey2571 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Watched this 2 years ago when it came out. Watching it again today, 12 days away from surgery! 💕

    • @ashi.7714
      @ashi.7714 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Happy pride months btw!!

  • @kaka-kawaiineko274
    @kaka-kawaiineko274 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    As a kid I use to fear boobs,and when it was finally that time when I started developing I tried to flatten them by literally punching myself in the chest

    • @Maukiki
      @Maukiki 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Kaka-kawaii Neko
      Same

    • @fireruby1882
      @fireruby1882 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      OUCH-

    • @thatbee64
      @thatbee64 21 ชั่วโมงที่ผ่านมา

      Same actually 😅

  • @artifedex
    @artifedex 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Oh god thank you SO MUCH for the tip on the anti nausea in the anesthesia... I’m emetophobic and I don’t feel like a lot of the community relates to that so I never see tips about this kind of stuff. You have no idea how much I appreciate that little thing, it will make all the difference. 💕💕💕💕💕

    • @Inseut
      @Inseut 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Same!! I have a really bad emetophobia, it's the only thing that scares me about top surgery (or any kind of surgery) :(

    • @scarletnxphilim2534
      @scarletnxphilim2534 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      SAME

    • @alexshemwell8320
      @alexshemwell8320 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Today I learned there's a word for my phobia.
      I've had emergency surgery a few times. The first time I told my concerns to the surgeon, and he didn't do anything for me and I felt sick upon waking. The second time I learned that when the anesthesiologist comes to check on you, you need to tell them that you're concerned about nausea and they'll put a patch behind your ear that is typically used to treat seasickness. I've never had a problem since.

  • @sammauceri5266
    @sammauceri5266 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you so much for this video!! As a nb person not pursuing T, it is so so helpful to get info on top surgery from your variety of perspectives. Thank you Jackson and Ash!!

  • @pianoflute22
    @pianoflute22 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I had a breast reduction before I realized I was agender and what I was going through was dysphoria. I've read that I still can get top surgery, but I'm honestly worried about my scars that I already have.

    • @Totalchaos0228
      @Totalchaos0228 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You're probably going to be fine. It's your body, and if it's a change you want to make...then go for it. Doctors these days can do some really great things especially in terms of scars and revising them or removing them almost completely! You'd definitely want to find a specialist and see if it's safe for your body.

  • @AliTheFlightlessBird
    @AliTheFlightlessBird 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    yo! the anti nausea thing is really helpful!! i had no idea you could do that, thank you 🙏🏼

  • @ezrajohnson7257
    @ezrajohnson7257 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    After several years of wanting top surgery I was finally approved

    • @cameurysm
      @cameurysm 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      congratulations!!!!!!!

  • @lemonman7705
    @lemonman7705 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    My surgery is tmrw I’m just vibing :))

    • @livvikitty
      @livvikitty ปีที่แล้ว

      how did it go 🤔

  • @gothmaze
    @gothmaze 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I feel like I am finally ready for this step. I cannot wait! Thank you for making this video and Ash is so lovely!

  • @stefaniesowa9568
    @stefaniesowa9568 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so much for sharing. I’m going through reconstructive surgeries for burn scars currently on my chest and I feel these tips about waiting for it to totally heal before moving so you don’t stretch the skin will totally help me. Thanks for the post!

  • @Totalchaos0228
    @Totalchaos0228 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I've always had a loce/ hate relationship with my breasts. I developed early and I hated it!! I was just 10 when it started then 11 when I got my period!! Then after breastfeeding my daughter at 17..I wanted implants so bad! Even after breastfeeding I had these tiny boobs and I thought they were awful! I used to obsess about getting implants and wearing very padded and push up bras. When I became an exotic dancer I was very surprised, the #1 thing people would tell me was "leave your boobs alone! They are fine!" Now as I'm 39 and a 32 barley B cup...I couldn't be happier with my small, but perky little boobs.
    The way you feel about your body is going to change at many points in your journey. When you learn to love it, accept it, and appreciate what it's done for you...you are free of all of these feelings.

  • @neeliwilson9771
    @neeliwilson9771 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    My bilateral mastectomy surgery for chronic breast pain is next week and this was very helpful! It wasnt centered around cancer...which is the majority of what ive found. Thank you both!!

    • @itsmexoxurmom
      @itsmexoxurmom 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      how did it go? hopefully we’ll :)

    • @neeliwilson9771
      @neeliwilson9771 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@itsmexoxurmom insurance fighting it... Pending 😞

  • @teaartist6455
    @teaartist6455 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    FYI, for anyone who needs to hear this, it can be super helpful to just use your fingers to pull on things immediately post-op. The muscles controlling your fingers are in your lower arm and thus a lot less affected by surgery.

  • @ashton988
    @ashton988 5 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    inb4 transphobes go wild on this video

  • @ruubux
    @ruubux 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The conversation in this video was really great!

  • @faarang-2453
    @faarang-2453 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I didn't prepare for post surgery depression and it hit me HARD, identity crisis and all. Despite knowing I'm sensitive to stress and having been on antidepressants for 5 years. So please please please prepare yourself emotionally 💖💖 even if you think you're "safe" from it, because you can never know for sure.

  • @darlingwater-ev
    @darlingwater-ev 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    truly peak timing for this, my surgery is a week today lol. excellent video. thanks so much

  • @abracadabra2395
    @abracadabra2395 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Button downs... OMG! I can't wear them because they don't fit with my large chest... That's going to bring me such joy while I'm feeling like crud during recovery.

  • @VirtualJMills
    @VirtualJMills 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Anesthesia nausea -- Term used in the US is PONV (Post-Operative Nausea and Vomiting), extremely common.
    A bunch of antiemetic options are available across several drug classes, discuss with doc & anesthesiologist before hand, read up on side effects, tolerance/addiction curve, etc… to find one which meets your needs.

  • @RhomboMus
    @RhomboMus 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Another thing, usually 40-60% of people who get peri need a revision and they can't really move the nipples to a more "typically masculine" area on the chest.

  • @lucacommonjay7894
    @lucacommonjay7894 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I love this video, but it also makes me very aware of how unprepared I went into top surgery. I am really happy with how I turned out, but I can't shake the thought that I would've ended up with better scars and stuff if I had only taken better care of myself...

  • @PastellPudding
    @PastellPudding 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    *aggressively takes notes*
    Having surgery in two months and this is so helpful! Thank you so much! :D

  • @pompidou8489
    @pompidou8489 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    helpful information, happy we have this recourse

  • @Hunter_Journal
    @Hunter_Journal 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks for sharing all this information.
    I start to prepare myself to get my top surgery and I am so scared but this helps so much. thank you

  • @AlessandroRL
    @AlessandroRL 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    this was really helpful. thank you guys! 🖤🖤

  • @nikolasslead6582
    @nikolasslead6582 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    This has been in my watch later since my freshman year, and now I'm only 1 year away from being old enough to get top surgery without my parents permission and both the passing time and the possibility feel so real and poggers :)

    • @stunningbrave3470
      @stunningbrave3470 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      You do not need a breast amputation because there is nothing wrong with your body. Society is at fault for its treatment of females.

  • @marsh9564
    @marsh9564 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I'm 2 1/2 weeks post top op at this time, thanks for this. Pillows, yes, a must. Button ups are a godsend, back scratcher also a must. So effin ecstatic the f's are gone. I had full on bilateral mastectomy and nip nop graft, and so far healing has been going good.

  • @MarcoQuon
    @MarcoQuon 5 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Hi!! My top surgery is in 5 days, and I’m a non-binary person not on Testosterone! I’ve been taking notes on this video, so I can prepare properly!! Thank you so much for making this, this means the world to me!

  • @Alex-px5bz
    @Alex-px5bz 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much for clearing some thing up for me, this helped so much.

  • @joncookiepants3287
    @joncookiepants3287 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Getting top surgery in a week, this really helped❤️❤️

  • @GoldfishConsumer
    @GoldfishConsumer 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’m also someone that’s super pasty pale, so it’s good to have that heads up that my scars are probably going to turn red occasionally!! I’m really not sure whenever I’ll be able to get my top surgery, but I hope I’ll be preparing soon!

  • @teissi
    @teissi 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Body painting party sounds incredible! It's something i might wanna adopt for myself 😊

  • @perryfunnyvideos
    @perryfunnyvideos 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The thing you said about wanting top surgery before you knew what it was, and thinking you wanted a breast reduction is literally how I realized I was trans. The more I thought about it the more I realized it's not cis to want to look like and be seen as a boy. I'd literally started talking about a breast reduction when I was 13 and got puberty.

  • @drawswithayda4656
    @drawswithayda4656 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Wow you guys know each other. THATS AMAZING I DIDN’T KNOW THAT AND I LOVE YOU BOTH SO MUCH

  • @walter-vq1fw
    @walter-vq1fw 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Getting top surgery tommorow! This video is very helpful !

  • @takeokuroshima2293
    @takeokuroshima2293 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I just found this video and i just adore you both to pieces

  • @alexreeves5947
    @alexreeves5947 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I’m still a couple of years away from top surgery but I don’t know how I’m going to survive, I live in pullover hoodies 😂 😭

    • @stunningbrave3470
      @stunningbrave3470 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You are going to survive just fine and statistically there is a very good chance that your possible gender dysphoria goes away without transition.

  • @bfree_777
    @bfree_777 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Way to go guys thanks for the much needed info.to help transguys

  • @lukereagor9396
    @lukereagor9396 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I watched this around when it first came out not having any idea of when I’d get top surgery and now I’m rewatching it cuz my surgery is May 28th!! I can’t wait it’s so un real to me still

  • @alexshutup
    @alexshutup 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Two of my favorite lgbt youtubers in one video yay

  • @clementinedewitt9022
    @clementinedewitt9022 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is so helpful 🥺

  • @krnshrn9450
    @krnshrn9450 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    hi!!
    I know this is a kinda old video but I just want to say thanks for making it! I kind of recently (like 8ish months) realised I'm nonbinary (afab) and I've had a weird relationship with my chest since I started puberty. I feel a lot more valid seeing someone else who's kinda aligned with my brains version of myself 🥰💕

  • @mikk5540
    @mikk5540 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Thank you for this! I’m genderqueer living in Sweden and I’m waiting for a date for breast reduction surgery and this was a great help even tho I’m not getting rid of all the titty. ;P

    • @ediblecactus5703
      @ediblecactus5703 ปีที่แล้ว

      That's called gender disforforia people. Clowns 🤡 who are actually afraid to be a woman are exactly the kind of women that the good men out there in this world will never even consider dating.

  • @colbydixon6695
    @colbydixon6695 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    My gosh, I love you and Ash

  • @arengray1712
    @arengray1712 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    when they said they’ve envisioned his chest being a certain way after surgery and being scared it’s not gonna be exactly the same… relatable as hell

  • @samk4379
    @samk4379 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Could you do a video on everything about your first binder

    • @jackisnotabird
      @jackisnotabird  5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Like this? th-cam.com/video/uavSjAcPGBQ/w-d-xo.html

  • @idkhaa5521
    @idkhaa5521 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    My friend will have a top surgery soon and honestly this is so helpful cause I'm gonna be taking care of him

  • @jazzy.melanie5051
    @jazzy.melanie5051 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thanks for adding captions I cant let my mom hear this

  • @MicahRion
    @MicahRion 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you so much for this video! I think I’m trans and nb. Not sure if testosterone on top surgery are things I’ll ever do. I’m getting to know myself and appreciating so much learning from other people. And learning what some physical transition options are! 😘

  • @laiclaro9100
    @laiclaro9100 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I'm non-binary and I really want top surgery. I don't care about having scars, but I wish I still feel the same when I touch my skin. I read some people say their niples lost part of the sensibility and I think it'd be weird

  • @danielboughal7793
    @danielboughal7793 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm still young so I haven't got any finalized plans with a surgeon for top surgery, but I'm hoping to get top surgery without being on T even though I'm trans-FTM. Thanks for so much information and answering a lot of the questions I personally have!

  • @hatshunemiku6749
    @hatshunemiku6749 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Just have to say two are my IDOL'S

  • @laurainrevison1162
    @laurainrevison1162 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Arnica is a natural aspirin salve. Although, it is a bit different. It helps with bruising too.

  • @darkenedemotion2553
    @darkenedemotion2553 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Getting top surgery in a week, hope mine looks how im visioning it to. Love u Ash ❤

  • @SlugcatEmporium
    @SlugcatEmporium 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I didn't think of this until after I saw a lot of Ash's previous top surgery videos, but now I'm scared that if I get top surgery I will have a lot of dysphoria/the focus will shift to my hips and *especially* my stomach. Not that I have wide hips, but my chest definitely takes my attention away from feeling like my stomach is sticking out or that my hips are too big... does anyone have advice on this? Is this a sign I shouldn't get surgery, or should put it off for a few more years?

    • @dontworryimfine1859
      @dontworryimfine1859 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I had top surgery almost a year and a half ago now and I would say my dysphoria definitely shifted to my lower half after recovery. I was already very aware of my wide hips before but it's like I suddenly had nothing else to focus on anymore? I thought I looked disproportionate but I think it had more to do with the shock of such a huge change because now I'm not so focused on my stomach and hips. Now it only pops in my head when clothes shopping or when I'm nervous about going somewhere and worried about being "read" male.

    • @teaartist6455
      @teaartist6455 ปีที่แล้ว

      It depends.
      I'd say it can definitely happen but for me it's more like...normal body dissatisfaction?
      Like, it's only 10-20% the pure, existential dread of being perceived as a woman due to those fucking growths on my chest but more like "Hmmm, Not a fan of being a chubby, bottom heavy guy. Really should try to change that".
      Which obviously isn't perfect but after disphoria it's a a huge relief.
      Even if it is, I'd say the same tactics (loose, oversized clothes) could also work to minimize your hips after surgery?

  • @magnuslightwood8818
    @magnuslightwood8818 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    This helped a lot! I'm gonna have top surgery in 2 days, wish me luck! :D

  • @arianniqua
    @arianniqua 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Im getting top surgery on Monday and im excited and nervous because this is my very first surgery!!!!

  • @CirstenSeverin
    @CirstenSeverin 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    These videos are super helpful