I am currently taking a RODBT class here in Wisconsin, USA. I've attended 4 classes so far and I can see the potential for learning about myself. It's been difficult. It's like re-wiring my brain.
I'm starting to wonder if over using traditional dbt skills and concepts can lead to overcontrol. I wonder why traditional dbt is even used with restrictive eating disorders and people who isolate when depressed or anxious.
This is totally me. I also think I have AvPD because I'm not close to anyone. People think I'm arrogant, but I'm really just shy/nervous. If I don't feel comfortable around someone, I'm incapable of letting my guard down, and I can't just snap out of it unfortunately.
I work in manufacturing and tight control over quality is definitely a plus. Turns out that I have more of an eye for quality than even my boss does! I often come across work that is out of tolerance, but they stick it through anyway. It really annoys me at times. I have pretty bad social anxiety and showing emotion is really difficult for me. I have essentially trained myself over much of the last 36yrs to hide my emotions. Not healthy. It has made my life deeply unsatisfying. As Carl Jung said, "The fool is the precursor to the saviour"
Same here. I just started working in quality a year ago and I have ability to find small errors and small out of tolerance issues. But this past year I had to learn the more flexibility about all the small stuff we let go and just give off to the customer anyways. I do hide my emotions a lot and find I am just unable to develop relationships with people at this workplace.
I just started working with a patient that is also finishing up with a RO-DBT group, and I'm trying to learn more about it. This video is very helpful. Thanks.
from 6:20 onwards is very essential information. : overcontrolling of emotions , no visible behavioural problem, actually getting REINFORCED by "society". this makes me wanna think about what other copings strategies are actually getting reinforced (!) as compared to others getting corrected by society ...
I met with a therapist who claimed to be able to use RO-DBT. He was overcontrolled. He could not lead me because he could not see any further than I could. I think that’s gonna be a big problem for this type of therapy… We need knowledge and the space to apply it. The blind can’t lead the blind.
I'm 28 y/o Male, Long time ago I heard about Masking, and ive always thought that perfectly described what I felt was wrong but I now think this is the true issue and masking is a coping mechanism ive learned to do to interact with people, it feels like I'm playing a character that i craft at the time and embody for the duration we are together and will put on at the drop of a hat, its completely un-conscience now. I remember as a child being super open and would talk with anyone even a complete stranger, never cared about people seeing what I'm really feeling. Then early in my school years in primary school I was bullied quite persistently by a kid I have since learned had his own issues at home, as a response I leaned to not let others know what i felt and i would let out what I felt was safe. It worked to stop the bullying but ive had I would say one truly close relationship and I felt like I was completely open and didn't hide my emotions, it was probably one of the best times of my life, but when it failed it was catastrophic. ive since had several very obvious opportunities to have close relationships and even though I recognize it, its like I am completely disinterested, but the reality could not be further from the truth.
As someone who's associated much more with thinking than feeling I find that it's much better to analyze a situation rather than to immediately perceive it. It's due to that which my thought process is "Look at it for what it is rather than what it can." I say it this way because analyzing ("What it is") is looking at the fact's implication while perceiving ("What it can") is how you feel about the fact. With this mindset I may be perceived as someone with emotional overcontrol alongside black and white thinking, but the fact of the matter is it's safer to think than feel unless the situation allows for full emotional expression (EX: Spending time with friends).
How do you make sure you not giving this treatment to autistic people, gaslighting them that they have a psychological problem when they just have different neurology? For an autistic this easily becomes another conversion therapy. What harms us (autistics) is all this framing of everything about us is broken. We have a 9x self deletion rate and there is a big potential for iatrogenic harm here
excellent very helpful i don't have a therapist but i have found this very useful iand i refuse to take olazapine i prefer autrailan bush flower essences and animal essences
Does the middle of the bell curve merely represent where the bulk of the population happens to lie? Or does it intend to reflect where the healthiest balance between the two extremes is that people should work to get to? Is there even an objective framework for debating which behaviors are more or less "healthy"?
From what I've been reading and working on personally, the bell curve is not necessarily the perfect bell curve as depicted. Like with most things in life, the balance point need not be exactly centered. The key is avoiding the extremes and being curious enough to monitor where you are at present time. If you are able to remain curious, you may find you are over-controlled in certain situations while under-controlled in other circumstances. If you can engage in active self-inquiry you'll be able to evaluate if you need to make an adjustment towards one direction or the other.
I'm a giant chicken! Love being able to do silly things and have a job as a English language teacher that encourages it. Something that broke me into freedom of expression was non-idomatic improvisation. The act of questioning boundaries of music and actively experimenting with it. Why play the guitar like this? Why not play while standing on one leg or pretending that your on Saturn?
Another “funtamental attribution error” riddled model that presumes our humanity can be understood in two dimensions. It's not you, it's you AND the context you're in.
So annoying all my life to keep being told that I look angry or am so serious when I feel completely calm and am not even really thinking about anything. “You should smile more!” It’s like, why? Nothing’s happening to provoke a smile lol.
I am currently taking a RODBT class here in Wisconsin, USA. I've attended 4 classes so far and I can see the potential for learning about myself. It's been difficult. It's like re-wiring my brain.
I'm starting to wonder if over using traditional dbt skills and concepts can lead to overcontrol. I wonder why traditional dbt is even used with restrictive eating disorders and people who isolate when depressed or anxious.
This is totally me. I also think I have AvPD because I'm not close to anyone.
People think I'm arrogant, but I'm really just shy/nervous. If I don't feel comfortable around someone, I'm incapable of letting my guard down, and I can't just snap out of it unfortunately.
Very interesting perspective on how over control can be detrimental, great content!
I work in manufacturing and tight control over quality is definitely a plus. Turns out that I have more of an eye for quality than even my boss does! I often come across work that is out of tolerance, but they stick it through anyway. It really annoys me at times.
I have pretty bad social anxiety and showing emotion is really difficult for me. I have essentially trained myself over much of the last 36yrs to hide my emotions. Not healthy. It has made my life deeply unsatisfying.
As Carl Jung said, "The fool is the precursor to the saviour"
Same here. I just started working in quality a year ago and I have ability to find small errors and small out of tolerance issues. But this past year I had to learn the more flexibility about all the small stuff we let go and just give off to the customer anyways. I do hide my emotions a lot and find I am just unable to develop relationships with people at this workplace.
Hugs!!!
I just started working with a patient that is also finishing up with a RO-DBT group, and I'm trying to learn more about it. This video is very helpful. Thanks.
from 6:20 onwards is very essential information. : overcontrolling of emotions , no visible behavioural problem, actually getting REINFORCED by "society".
this makes me wanna think about what other copings strategies are actually getting reinforced (!) as compared to others getting corrected by society ...
I think this overcontrol will describe me in some situations such as work but not as much in personal relationships.
Yep. Some organisations really reinforce this. If you have the ability to switch in different circumstances then you are doing well
I met with a therapist who claimed to be able to use RO-DBT. He was overcontrolled. He could not lead me because he could not see any further than I could. I think that’s gonna be a big problem for this type of therapy… We need knowledge and the space to apply it. The blind can’t lead the blind.
Sounds like he would be great at normal DBT.😅
I'm 28 y/o Male, Long time ago I heard about Masking, and ive always thought that perfectly described what I felt was wrong but I now think this is the true issue and masking is a coping mechanism ive learned to do to interact with people, it feels like I'm playing a character that i craft at the time and embody for the duration we are together and will put on at the drop of a hat, its completely un-conscience now. I remember as a child being super open and would talk with anyone even a complete stranger, never cared about people seeing what I'm really feeling. Then early in my school years in primary school I was bullied quite persistently by a kid I have since learned had his own issues at home, as a response I leaned to not let others know what i felt and i would let out what I felt was safe. It worked to stop the bullying but ive had I would say one truly close relationship and I felt like I was completely open and didn't hide my emotions, it was probably one of the best times of my life, but when it failed it was catastrophic. ive since had several very obvious opportunities to have close relationships and even though I recognize it, its like I am completely disinterested, but the reality could not be further from the truth.
Great content - I am over controlling and stuck - will find out more thank you x
thank you for upload
Love ya work, Jess! This does sound really quite interesting...
As someone who's associated much more with thinking than feeling I find that it's much better to analyze a situation rather than to immediately perceive it. It's due to that which my thought process is "Look at it for what it is rather than what it can." I say it this way because analyzing ("What it is") is looking at the fact's implication while perceiving ("What it can") is how you feel about the fact. With this mindset I may be perceived as someone with emotional overcontrol alongside black and white thinking, but the fact of the matter is it's safer to think than feel unless the situation allows for full emotional expression (EX: Spending time with friends).
Definitely me... But I'm making positive progress on it. Thanks a lot.
Great stuff. Would love earn more about the Overcontrol
Thanks Paul. Have you got the handout from our website?
@@thePSYCHcollective no but I will check it out. Thanks!
videos are super helpful, thank you!
You’re welcome
How do you make sure you not giving this treatment to autistic people, gaslighting them that they have a psychological problem when they just have different neurology? For an autistic this easily becomes another conversion therapy. What harms us (autistics) is all this framing of everything about us is broken. We have a 9x self deletion rate and there is a big potential for iatrogenic harm here
Shit like this needs to be taught in high school
Great job explaining this subject! I just Subscribed.
excellent very helpful i don't have a therapist but i have found this very useful iand i refuse to take olazapine i prefer autrailan bush flower essences and animal essences
I thought I had high Narcissist traits..but maybe I jus have this.
Wud an overcontrolled and undercontrolled easily be attracted to eachother..?
Can it help clients who lose touch with their feelings when they are in presence of other people?
Too good explanation. ..!
Too relatable.
Detached Protector or Perfectionistic Overcontroller?
Definitely overcontroller
Does the middle of the bell curve merely represent where the bulk of the population happens to lie? Or does it intend to reflect where the healthiest balance between the two extremes is that people should work to get to? Is there even an objective framework for debating which behaviors are more or less "healthy"?
From what I've been reading and working on personally, the bell curve is not necessarily the perfect bell curve as depicted. Like with most things in life, the balance point need not be exactly centered. The key is avoiding the extremes and being curious enough to monitor where you are at present time. If you are able to remain curious, you may find you are over-controlled in certain situations while under-controlled in other circumstances. If you can engage in active self-inquiry you'll be able to evaluate if you need to make an adjustment towards one direction or the other.
Did u offer training on RO-DBT?
Thanks again Jess. “Resting bitch face”..!! Lol.
thats a frustration problem of having feelings but not able to express them
Well that explains my wife to a t. Thanks for the video
I'm a giant chicken! Love being able to do silly things and have a job as a English language teacher that encourages it.
Something that broke me into freedom of expression was non-idomatic improvisation. The act of questioning boundaries of music and actively experimenting with it. Why play the guitar like this? Why not play while standing on one leg or pretending that your on Saturn?
That is awesome!
Interesting
I feel like I'm a lot of this stuff but a but muted. Not as extreme
omg i dont even hear anything what the f is that??
Another “funtamental attribution error” riddled model that presumes our humanity can be understood in two dimensions. It's not you, it's you AND the context you're in.
This is basically just most men
And autistic people
So annoying all my life to keep being told that I look angry or am so serious when I feel completely calm and am not even really thinking about anything.
“You should smile more!” It’s like, why? Nothing’s happening to provoke a smile lol.