20 Harsh lessons I learned at 38 but wish I knew at 20
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 27 ก.ย. 2024
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Hi lovelies, today I'm sharing with you 20 life lessons and harsh truth about life that I know now in my late 30 that I really wish I knew back in my 20s because it would have save me so much time, headache, heartache and money. Enjoy!
Love, Poppy xx
Instagram: @poppydontree
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I wish I knew in my 20s that "done is better than perfect".
I agree, was such a big lesson for me too.
Thank god I’m still in my 20’s. Y’all old af
Well said.
After 3 years of marriage I've come to the conclusion that comparing your relationship with others is a waste of time. Everyone is different and as you said, everyone creates their own boundaries. My partner and I create a unique union that will never be the same as other couples in social media or even real life. Thanks for sharing this! I love your videos!
Do you mind giving examples of what you mean by creating a unique union?
thats super beautiful! and honestly a really important lesson and learning that i feel we need to implement more of. comparison robs us of the beauty to actually CREATE and shape our own relationships into whatever we want them to be. 💗
You shouldn't even look at social media . It's cancer
Nah leave them. There’s always someone better
@@rickysampson8759 Hopefully take half and monkey branch! Monkey branch to being the next multi millionaire! Female logic!
Lesson I learned over the years "stop looking for yourself in others"
The "no one is coming to save you" hit me hard. I'm 26 and in my culture I should've been married but I'm not. A man is expected to take care of the woman which I am not against but when you also tie in the the factor that marriage is lifelong and not just a wedding night , you realize being with a partner that you actually see eye to eye with is hard. I am now going to be going back to school for my masters in counseling and aiming for a career to take care of myself.
good luck with your masters!!!! 💗
@@JenniferAguilera oh thank you🥹🤍
@@ya9321 absolutely!!! 💗
Are you Indian?
Don't worry
Everything is gonna be alright 😊
Just focus on living rather than fitting into stereotypes made by society
Remember marriage was invented for women to help them survive in a world where it was very tough for a woman to survive without a man
But now things are not that bad,women can survive on their own so prioritize your wellbeing and never ever forget to LIVE your life fully
I am not saying just avoid marriage as plague 😂 Just saying try to remember not everyone gets the chance to survive and live in this world,so don't take this chance for granted😊
"No one thinks about you as much as you think about yourself"
Right
No one is coming to save you but many people will help.
No one is going to do the job for you, but there will be people who will support you on your journey.
beautifully put!
I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
-i felt that.
The biggest mistakes I've ever made in life are the ones where I listened to other people telling me what they think I should do and I listened for some bizarre reason. And it cost me big time. Nobody knows what's best for you except you.
Wonderful video. We are about the same age (I am 37) and I agree with all of these. Another one I want to add is: You are responsible for your own happiness. You cannot expect your partner, friends, family or children to make you happy.
1) No one is coming to save you: life is consistency
2) A good relationship takes sacrifices
3) Building wealth is about owning assets: real estate, equity
4) Pros and cons don't work, what will you regret not doing?
5) Health is the main priority, not aesthetic
6) Black swans happen
7) Don't be afraid to change
8) Be able to lose your old self
9) Lifetime learning
10) Don't blame others, learn to work around, how did your actions contribute to this?
11) Grass always looks greener
12) Try and fail
13) Be the partner that you want to have
14) No one thinks about you as much as you
15) All your actions compound over time
16) Internet keeps lifetime archive
17) Fuel your body accordingly (food choices)
18) Shed people
19) Wedding is for a day, marriage is for life
20) Control your reaction to outcomes and events
thank you
Thank you 🙏
❤
Thank you 😊
THANK YOU! 😀
The compounding effect can’t be underestimated. Im turning 40 this year and it’s quite apparent the compounding effects of people’s life choices my age and the positions it lands them in life.
Hello dear, I just would like to thank you for sharing these content with us. At 33, whenever I listen to motivational talks don’t inspire or motivate me anymore, unlike when I was in my 20’s where I get inspired and start going for my dreams. However now in my 30’s, nothing excites me anymore. I learned that learning new things, and other people’s stories inspire me more to create my own, and to rediscover myself and what I love to do. Knowing more about myself, and the purpose of my life keeps me going more than aspiring to become rich and successful. I don’t know.. but I just became lowkey and relaxed nowadays, simple things make me happy. Oh and I don’t have a partner yet, but somehow I’m still at peace and happy I have so much time to do all the things I wanna do and just focus on becoming a better version of me. I realized that before someone commits to me, I must commit to myself first. Your videos help me realize these things. Thank you for doing what you do. ❤
Best thing I learned is that not everything is possible but so so much is possible. Stay Uncommon!
It's funny how all of these lessons can sometimes seem so obvious. Maybe because of social media and the internet, it feels like we've heard them all in one form or another. But sometimes we're not ready to fully receive any particular piece of advice and it just bounces off of us at the moment. What makes videos like this helpful is that they serve as a reminder. Maybe someone found this video at just the right time or one the lessons popped out at them at a particularly relevant point in life. By the way, I just made a video very similar to this, so I'd love to hear if any of those life lessons have impacted your life as well. Great vid Poppy.
This was the kick in the butt I needed today. Thank you! And I have come to the same conclusions just turning 40 💪🏻
I figured this out at 33 Changed countries and jobs at 33. From 37 to 47 made my first million. For 99%,your family or friends or job is not going to save you. Time to try something new.
Poppy - very happy to see your new 'life reflections' videos are getting you the following that you deserve.
Hey there, thank you! I think the universe listens when doing what feels right. Hope you're doing good!
38 😦 i dunno about u guys but she looks 27
Yes I agree
makeup
It's the Asian genes
@@bugra320 she looks even younger without make up lol didnt you watch the clips?
@@alwaysdisney2665 no she doesnt
I am in my mid 40's and I think all of these lessons are absolutely spot-on. Well said.
As a 25 year old watching this I feel kind of underestimated by being told this is the novel advice I need for my 20s…
Hey boss. Thanks for another biscuit of wisdom. I think a lot of us folks feel just a tad bit more courageous, and maybe even invincible with your insight in our pocket. Happy weekend. Already looking forward to the next video :D
Thanks for sharing these honest truth❤. Recently a lot of things has been happening in my life and i really need some encouragement in an honest way rather than saying honey coated words.
Thanks for being here and sharing valuable lessons. It’s a good reminder. Sometimes we have done the work and are doing the work but we still need to change our mindset to positive. Make changes if need be but keep pressing forward. And find the positive if you are doing the work. Appreciate the things you are doing and have already done. 💕
Absolutely!
I wish, as a man, that in my 20s I had realised that what women say they want and what they really want are often two completely different thing …
and more importantly …
Go where you’re wanted, not necessarily where members of the opposite gender are. The difference is subtle but total.
And …
A one % advantage is often a 100 % of the difference or outcome.
Fake it til you make it… don’t ever show your cards. 🃏 Instagram is a prime example. Everyone looks happy, taking trip pics and looking rich.
Sad to burst your bubbles, but for your benefit, it has to be said.
Instagram is not the prime example of optimum/grand/fulfilling life experiences. Because those who fake it to make it on the Instagrams of the world continue to fake it for the rest of their lives. There's no peace or fulfilment in that.
When you think about life, think long-term not short-term and you'll be happier.
True. I know a girl who has tons of followers, and posts amazing videos on Instagram which make her look beautiful and rich, when in reality she's poor and unattractive.
wish all u want. but each one has his/her own journey. and the best way to start living is not yesterday, not tomorrow, but today.
That no one is coming to save you!! Hit different this morning 💪🏾💪🏾💪🏾
You're not wrong hun have definitely felt the heartless aspect of poor or rich peoples cruelty of greed and fakeness
She is speaking the truth here
Don’t stress so much, things have a way of working themselves out.
You have good common sense and have great advice. I would add learning to live with less, and don’t try to impress others, be focused on health, and gaining experiences and not trying to just gain with money in the bank, money won’t keep you happy, you’ll need to find happiness within yourself.finding a partner isn’t a popularity contest, be authentic and find just one that is the one who wants you, that’s the right one for you. At 68 now I finally am living the life I want, even my ex and I love each other and are better friends than husband and wife. I’ll travel the world and have a better last one third of my life than the first two thirds. ❤🙏😊
Thankss! You gave me some very important fundamental aspects and advice for life. I recently realized I need a big change and in order to change I need to let go of things. Thanks to your insights I regained motivation in order to do so and become the main character in my own life again!! 😊
There's a reason why you learned those lessons at 38 and not 20. You did not learn those things at 20 because you weren't ready to learn them at 20. You did not at that time possess knowledge, experience, nor did you put in the process and change your vibrational frequency at that age to know the things you know now. You know and have learned them now (at 38) because you are ready to learn them now. Not 10 years from now and certainly not 20 years ago. This type of mindset can often leave a person in resentment over what hasn't been learned or experienced in the past. Life doesn't work this way. So, be at peace knowing that you are experiencing and learning exactly what you are supposed to and this is based on the daily process that you engage in, which shifts your vibration in the direction that you wish to go. Good luck.
She didn’t put in the process and change her vibrational frequency? What a condescending comment
Agreed. But the reason why many feel “I wish….” is mankind cannot be young forever or at least till the end. With age the ability to do things will decline, so as accomplishments.
Im turning 35 this year but still on the way on how to deal with things in life, its difficult but will go through it.
38 but still looking very youthful
Both my family and God have saved me multiple times over.
Just wanna say that I really love your advice. It’s realistic and authentic. Thank you ☺️
Great content Poppy.. as always 😍
Thank you!! 😁
We are doing too much of everything & resting less. Being content should also be a part of life. Learning skills all the time & adding chaos to life is also less spoken.
Spot on. Enjoyed your vlog.
Glad you enjoyed it
Thank you Poppy !
Anytime ❤️
The great recession taught me this when I lost my job and had to rely on food pantries to survive. Meanwhile my family in another state knew what I was going through and didn't lift a finger to help
Thanks for making us be real. Love it Poppy. Its kiff.
Oh Wow! 😳
I love ❤this message 🙏.
I am glad that am your age mate and ready to listen 👂🏿 to this powerful podcast 💪.
Thank you God 🙏 and for sharing this powerful message 🙏 today.
When I was four, I learn that Life is Cruel...that was the year I watch my family buried my mother.
I am very sorry to hear this. I will offer a quick prayer for your peace.
You're right life is cruel
Me remembering nearly all the bags from the jag collection in LYXBAG other apartment on the dimond tray.. I think i watched that video like 40 times. Purse collection goals..
Wise words lady. I think lots of ladies expect special, entitled treatment without thinking about reciprocating….
Did we just become best friends? Lol i am married happily for almost 10 years but I can so relate! Youre so right! Comparison is the thief of joy!!
I just love all the points you had mentioned! worth watching this & thanks a ton for posting this !
You're so welcome and glad it was helpful!
thank you for sharing 💗 lets get our dream lifes yall
Thank for the video. It helps me a lot on the decision dilemma. lesson learnt "Pros and Cons list are useless when it comes to life decisions"
Great video! Also I liked some of the advice. I myself with autism including a learning disability including cognitive disability where I struggle to fit into society, get bullied by other people for my struggles with a disability, and many others. In life I struggle with friendships because many people ghost me or ignore me and put me down. Also I struggle with my disability in a work place due to having trouble at fast pace and understanding how to do a task efficiently where it causes people to be easily flustered with me despite me working for 10 years including trying my best to be hard worker. Also I got an associate's degree with a liberal arts from a community college where it is hard for me to find a job that pays well or have benefits because many jobs require a higher education. I do some volunteering to help feed homeless people including people who are low income get food or other essential items as a way for me to learn about society, social justice, and the importance of helping people when they have struggles. Also I have struggles with having a connection with girls because I get made fun of for being different or having a disability. The best thing that I can do in society is be creative at learning, taking the time to volunteer, use critical thinking to help me learn different things, and many others.
Needed this today ❤
What you haven't mentioned is that I've always wanted to find an Asian woman to be my life partner and based on your example I'll start looking among Thai girls now. Thank you for that hint. And good luck at your new place!
It is great that you figured out the health priority so earlier in your life
You are really wise!
When you threw away all those guys that came to save you in your youth, we got the message and we leave you alone.
Nope Thailand :)
Appreciated and thank you for sharing ❤
21. PPL who are nice to you can be more harmful, then ppl who are rude not, because their intensions are clear.
With age comes wisdom.😂
Me too realized that you see bad side of others when u stop giving. From family, friends to maid 😅. Nothing is free in this world
I learned the hard way in my 20s not to put my eggs in one basket, or basically relying only on one job. I had plans of saving up by staying at the job for a certain number of years, only to be suddenly laid off. Now I work a job plus a side hustle, and I plan on doing more side gigs online so if I'm ever laid off again, I want to be my own boss, have flexible time and still make money, as well as take my time and pick a better job with no rush.
Thank you for these. ❤
Thank you for this Poppy! 😊
You're welcome!
Poppy you are breathtaking
> 4) Pros and cons don't work, what will you regret not doing?
This is one I need to learn lmao.
I try to be all mathematical about everything. Then lose out on experiences.
i tried helping beautiful women several times. Looks and s3x can only go so far. They become to dependent on me and it was time to move on to women in their early 20s! LEO knows and i'm on his camp!
Very very good video. Thank you for letting Younger women know this. I wish I knew this and I am older than you. No one told me anything.
I knew these things at 20.
However, our lives are rather driven by the choices we made than things we did not know.
Choice is an illusion
She had quit self-pity and stood on her own two feet.
Thank you for this vlog👍
Very wise and on point!
Thank you!
Thank you!
Omg, I'm the same age as you and I thought the same! No one is coming to save you! 😢
One should marry a filthy rich person. Sad, but true. Brutal truth. It's kinda conniving, immoral......call it as you see fit.
But if you're by yourself or (even worse) married to a _regular_ person - life is gonna be *hell* .
Sorry madam, there is a typo, think you meant 28
😂😂
Family. Nothing more important.
Why would anyone need to be saved?
Absolutely right. I agree
This is a good listen
Avoid dangerous people
❤❤❤❤❤ this is very good advice!
Thank you!
I mean project.Pat told everybody to don't save her.What did you ladies expect😂
Guys learn this lesson around age 13
.
Thanks.This is great
Great lessons. I´m 50 plus and I think it's great if we can share life advice
Thank you!
Everything is me me me and I I I. It's all baggage. Who wants baggage? If your want to be saved, save others
8:26 Love it 💁🏽♀️👏🏽
Excellent advice, new subscriber 🎉❤
Thanks for subbing!
I really hate when people make videos titled 20 harsh lessons or 20 harsh truths, none of them are "lessons or "truths" they're all opinions
Well yh that’s kind of implied
Finally, someone who is giving adult advice.
Brilliant! ❤
Jesús is. ❤
Great video.
Faith until you make it 🙏🏻
No one is coming to save me. I learn this after I hit rock bottom. Slowly climbing back up.
Work on finding a trustworthy small group of friends. I am in my 50's and i have 5 to 6 true life long friends that helped me in the down times. Also i helped them in their bad times too.They are out there keep looking.
@@adriengadson3544 happy for you. I helped my friends out thru the bad, but when it’s my turn. Everyone disappeared and I’m on my own.
1) No one is coming to save you. Unfortunately, you have to forgive your wife when she does not want to save you.
2) A good relationship takes sacrifices. It is one way street sometimes. My wife does the cooking and laundry when I do the cleaning. We both share responsibilities in educating our kids.
3) Building wealth is about owning assets. We are fortunate to pay off 2 homes before my retirement. I do work part-time as an engineering tutor.
4) Pros and cons don't work. Well... You have no choice when you are stuck.
5) Health is the main priority, not aesthetic. I do my sit ups and pushups. I do mop our floors which help me burn some calories.
6) Black swans happen. This is true... My parents have gotten very ill where I need to take care of them while I am a full-time father. It just makes no sense to work as long as I have to take care of my aging parents.
7) Don't be afraid to change. Marriage and being a father can do this.
8) Be able to lose your old self. I worked at the Samsung company as an engineer for 7.5 years. I just have to let it go when I was never happy working there. If your employer fired you illegally, you really need to move on and respect their decisions after they gave you a generous severance package.
9) Lifetime learning. I do try to learn online.
10) Don't blame others. Truth about the human race is that people are always jealous of your success. It is not easy to have friends who are happy for you when you succeed. Also, people do not want to associate people with little income. Alcohol drinking is almost mandatory to have friends. If you don't drink any alcohol, it is difficult to connect even though the people around you go to church. A lot of Christians do require alcohol to build friendships. If so, you need to move on by not associating with them.
11) Not all relationships are the same. My wife is 10 years younger than myself. I don't think many couples can emphasize our struggles. I believe my wife married me because I graduated from UC Berkeley and because I am a Christian. We are fortunate to pay off 2 homes before my retirement.
12) Try and fail. I would try and fail before you get married. I don't think my wife will be happy if I was a graduate student in college.
13) Be the partner that you want to have. I always wanted to marry a Christian wife. Now, I am married to a Christian wife. It is what I wanted.
14) No one thinks about you as much as you. Unfortunately, if you go to church, people do get jealous of you. When people know how God blesses you, it is better to stay home. If you don't have money, nobody wants to be your friend as well.
15) All your actions compound over time. You have to stop smoking and stop drinking alcohol when you suffer from health problems from them.
16) Internet keeps lifetime archive. I agree. I should be careful.
17) Fuel your body accordingly. I need to thank my wife for caring what I eat.
18) Shed people. I do cut out some of my peers who are not really my friends because of time constraints.
19) Wedding is for a day, marriage is for life. I need to be thankful that my wife understands this. We spent only $10k on our wedding including the ring and honeymoon. That's how we paid off our 2nd home.
20) Control your reaction to outcomes and events. So true... You need to have proper sleep not to overreact to other outcomes and events.
one of the reasons your wife married you cus ur from berkeley? hope you can back up that evidence but truly she may just be excited for your accomplishments and genuinely care for your success
Health is very important, but your soul/eternal salvation is the MOST important thing in your life, life on earth is what 70-80 years, eternal life is well...forever. Great points though, very nice.
Love your video and I also watched other videos of you, you mentioned living in Thailand before, are you Thai? ❤
คนไทยค้า 😊
@@reinventingpoppy ว่าแล้วเชียว ☺️ ชอบเนื้อหา และะโทนเสียงมากเลยคะ
It’s too late when you have that realization ::