What have you given up that makes you happier? I meant to say as part of number nine, I’ve stopped beating myself up for missing an exercise session, or eating pudding! I concentrate on adding good stuff to my diet rather than denying myself a biscuit!
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond Hi , thank you ! i think you covered nearly everything but i will have a think if there's anything i've changed since hitting 60 ! 😊
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond what a awesome advice! i will definitely need to review my list, and start quitting all those things that make life miserable.
1. Uncomfortable clothing 2. Rushing 3. Apologizing all the time 4. Saying yes all the time 5. Doom scrolling 6. Buying stuff I dont need 7. Watching the news 8. Listening to other people's opinions (trust own instincts) 9. Stopped self ceiticism/guilt 10. Worrying about aging
Hi Jo, I really like this video. When my wonderful wife of 42 years passed away, I sold the car, sold the TV, quit my job, and gave away all of the Christmas decorations, including the tree. I ride my bicycle 8 - 10 miles daily and walk to nearby stores for groceries, etc.. And regarding my friends and my brother, I don't put the key to my happiness in someone else's pocket.
@@frankducett9 I’m so sorry for your loss. It puts everything into perspective, doesn’t it? Fundamentally, we don’t need half the things we think we do. Wishing you well.
@@Haidakhan1008 😆 I've had the very same experience. Much prefer the third and last phase; so I'll hang around here, as long as I get to live the precious Life 💖
Time, money and chemicals! I've stopped too, at least for now. I'm curious to see what happens. I'd prefer white to grey, but we'll see what comes. And I can't promise I won't ever dye again, but I'd like to stay the course!
Me too! No more hair color. Do I miss the "brown"? Sometimes. But I do not miss all that wasted time in the beauty shop, spending the money every month to have my hair colored & worrying about my roots showing 2 weeks later. It's very freeing not to worry about hair.
@@janetbennell9855. I did this a few years ago and *knew* I would be unhappy for the 2 years it takes to grow it all the way out. So many women cave during this stage because you will never like the gray/white/silver against the “old” dyed hair. I grew mine out about an inch then found an excellent stylist who stripped the dye out of my hair (heavily conditioned it with Olaplex for a month prior), then toned it silver. I loved it but I will say that phase had challenges as well because the silver color doesn’t stay. It eventually turns yellowish (the bleach coming through). It took some experimenting and I don’t even recall what all products I used now to get through it but sometimes I wasn’t happy with the yellow but it was *much* better than the half gray/half dyed look. It was expensive, but for me it was worth it. I do not miss dying my hair!
One of the most liberating things I’ve done at the age of 65 is to no longer have to put up with an old friend and his wife who really annoy me. They brag. They have a smug face. They think they’re better than everyone else and they think the world revolves around them. She can talk about herself all night and is the most “me me me” person I’ve ever met. Well, after a 40 year friendship, I’ve given them the boot. It’s not the best thing in life to effectively sack friends but I’m just not prepared to have to endure them anymore. I feel happier, less burdened and other friends who also know them have praised me for being honest and direct whilst they remain two faced and scared to upset anyone. You’re right, life is too short. It’s too short to waste time with people who drag you down and upset you.
At 60 I became a Believer in the Lord Jesus' as such all my former friends became irrelevant. I went on to make a few new friends Today my Bible is my best friend
I finally disconnected from a friend of 50 years, I feel so much better, I felt because we had years of history together that I had to be her BFF, when I realized how she was so opposite from me, I broke ties and I'm happier without having to talk to her.
Amen! Preach it. Life is too short to willingly spend time n the company of people you hate or have no respect for (unless you're getting a paid to do it!)😂
50 years ago when I was a teen, an older person told me, “the less people know about you, the better off you are “. I have lived by that and tried to teach my kids that. This is important at any age.
Given that I’ve just kind of launched a part of my life here on this channel, it would be hypocritical of me to say I agree, but I do n’t disagree. I think the key is to share what we want to be known. And protect the rest.
I quit making early morning appointments. My motto is “No appointments before noon.” This allows me to have a relaxing start to my day and lots of “me time” in the morning.
I'm retired and I also decided that I didn't have to get up for ridiculously early appointments - my motto is unless someone is paying me to come to an early appointment I'm not doing it anymore.
Exactly! I used to bend over backwards to accommodate people like letting repair men come whenever they wanted to. Now I only allow appointments to happen at a time that works for me. It has made a big difference in my stress levels.
Good idea. My husband watches it all day as (he says) he needs to be up to the minute for his day-trading. He can have it because I now realise how much of the news just brings a person down, down down. Now I just watch the nightly news on one channel & that is enough. My mental health has gone through the roof since not watching so much news! It can make you really ,really angry and disappointed in human kind.
I quit watching the News in 1994. My son was born & I felt that I was bombarded without warning. I didn’t want my son to see it as he came in the room. Best thing I ever did! I keep up to date on line on my time & not the stations.
lol- your #1 makes me smile because at 55, I stopped buying uncomfortable clothes. I just turned 56, and only want cotton and linen. No matter how cute or pretty a piece of clothing is, if it’s not natural fabric, forget it! Thank you for sharing your list.
I gave up ironing in my early 50s, haven’t ironed a thing since then, now in my 60s. So unfortunately natural fabrics wouldn’t look good on me but I understand where you are coming from.
I gave up being in or pursuing relationships with men when I turned 50. I gave the last one his marching orders. I'm almost 54 now and I'm blissfully single. No longer are my decisions based on what a man might thinks about me. I'm also wealthier for not being in a relationship, because somehow, no matter how wealthy they are, I'm poorer! Not just monetary, but time and energy. What the hell was all that last 30-odd years about? I'm trying to make the most of what time I've got left, and a 'romantic' relationship is not on the agenda. I'm as likely to finding one that enhances my life as winning the lottery.
I’m right there with you sister! I found true happiness when I realized pursuing a relationship with men caused me much confusion and unhappiness. I am so much more fulfilled and happy without them. I play pickleball and have guy friends, which is all I need plus family and great girlfriends .
I let my hair go grey and am growing it out. I looove it! It's midback and I no longer care that some people may think I am too old for it. I have given up bitterness and try my best to practice forgiveness, quickly. I smile more and practice gratefulness for everything God has blessed me with. I made peace with my beautiful sisters. They are my best friends now. I read God's word more. I am more centered, peaceful and less anxious. I'm working on worrying less. Changing my worry list to a prayer list 😊 I am becoming fearless with God's help.🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤ Thank you for your awesome channel🎉
@@thelionandthebee1933 I love that you feel more centred, peaceful and less anxious! Recognising bitterness, never mind letting it go is an art. I’m glad your faith helps you x
I really love this comment. I am 60 and need- and want- to change things in my life, let go of things/habits/patrerns etc that don't serve me. I need to be more free. Your comment about making peace with your sisters especially resonated with me as I am pretty much estranged from both of mine. There are good reasons but it makes me sad all the same. We live in a triangle around the world far apart from each and at the moment I have little contact with either of them yet one of them I grew up with like a twin and we were so close well into our 30s. I would love to find the way to make peace before one of us leaves this earth.🙏
@taramatheis1451 Blessings, Miss Tara. My sweet Mami, before going Home to Heaven, asked me to "behave like the eldest. Do not expect her to change. You change. Become a peacemaker. Stop being a fighter." 87 year old Mami's. Phew. I began by not responding to my beautiful sister's offenses. She'd mouth off, and I would stay quiet. But began praying that God would speak to her heart. The silence worked! When my voice (and my comments) were not there to fight with, she could hear God's still, small voice, and examine her actions clearer. She began to apologize to me. I was shocked. The other thing that I did, knowing us sweet sisters, I told her (at an appropriate time:), in a soft voice, that I knew she had said harmful things about me and that I forgive her. Now, gulp. I said that I forgave her for the past things she has said AND for any future things she will say. And that I loved her. There was denial from her re: any harmful comments said. But that's OK. She heard and felt what I had said. And I meant it. We pray daily together now. Just a short 3 minute prayer over the phone after we share what'sgoing on in our lives. Once in a while the enemy tries to get in there and cause trouble between us. We recognize his games. We step back and pray some more. I pray that you and your sisters will come together once more. When we were fighting and struggling with misunderstandings, I used to say to my sister, "What must God want to accomplish with you and I together, if the enemy is working so hard at separating us!" May the Lord bless you, sweet Miss Tara. You all will be in our prayers. The world is turning upside down. We need a lot of love and support to get through this. Blessings to you. Shine on!
Top few on my list. I quit Facebook, I don’t need my head full of other peoples curated lives and don’t want to advertise mine.. I also now have no problem saying no to things I don’t want to do as I spent far too many years being a people pleaser. I’ve quit putting myself down. When people say I like your top I used to say I look a bit fat in it. Now I just say thank you.
Good for youuu....👍. I wish I could. But since I was wasteful with my money and own no house / flat, I have to work until official retirement. Thank goodness I like my work and it's only 3 years to go.
I'm 66. I gave up reading newspapers when I was 50. Then at 53, I donated the TV to our gardner. Then at 60, I quit facebook and insta. Now, I do yoga, crochet, read, go bird watching, paint, hike, road trips and sometimes, sit quietly and watch the sun set. Slow living is the key today, for me.
That's a very deliberate progression - I applaud you! I haven't given up TV, though I am very selective about what I watch. But I am with you on the slow living - I feel so much calmer and more connected to what matters when I slow down. x
New subscriber here. 🙂 I'm 63 and have stopped watching not only the news but ANY commercial television. I use Netflix because there are no ads. I don't like Amazon Prime video because they force ads, so when I really want to watch something on there, I mute the ads and avert my eyes so none of the marketing gets into my head. My approach seems extreme to some, but we are bombarded with marketing all day, whether we're in public or in our homes, and I refuse to participate in it any longer! A couple days ago I was in the waiting room of the car dealership as my car was being repaired, and I had to endure an hour of live television, which was loaded with vile election commercials. I was almost ready to run out of there screaming.
Good point! I record live TV exactly so I can fast forward through the ads! At least on TH-cam you only have to endure them for a few seconds before you can press "skip".
I'm your age and right there with you!!! 🥂 I am absolutely ALLERGIC to a blapping TV. I stay off Facebook for the same reason. It takes up real estate in my head and is depressing, but do have an old anonymous alternate account that is subscribed to groups of interest. No friends on there.
I'm with you. I also mute the ads, and/or change the channel. I absolutely don't watch news. I go outside, if possible, so I don't have to watch the TV at the car dealership. Life is too short to put up with shtuff!
At 65 I have given up wearing heavy denim jeans!!! Lightweight knit pull-ons from here on out! I’ve also in the process of wearing far less makeup than I used to. I’m retired now and a full face of makeup no longer makes sense and takes up too much of my time. I’m becoming accustomed to my own face with just a few products that go on super easy.
YES - I wear very little make-up. Mainly because I have a head full of magic and forget a lot of the time, but also because I think we, as a society, need to get used to seeing what 60, 40, 50, 70 year old faces look like! I made this short film in 2020 about a photo project I did, making portraits of women 40 plus without their make up. There's a book too. You might enjoy it when you're sitting down with a cuppa! th-cam.com/video/X6k4wHaq9gg/w-d-xo.html
I too have quit wearing jeans. I think when women hit a certain age jeans no longer look nice and they aren’t comfortable. I have also cut back on makeup…less is more.
It's funny, I (61) can confirm each of your points 100%. Isn't it wonderful to be in this Age? I have never been so self-confident and self-determined in my life❤
Brilliant list! I’m in my 70s and have worked through some of these already. Comfortable clothes was first on my lit once I reached my 50s! I’m declutterring my house at present. Every item that leaves is a small liberation! Still have things to work on, but I’m of your mind for sure!
I always said if leggings go out of style. I will still wear them after being younger. Wearing high heels and tight dresses and jeans. And as us girls know no I want everything. Comfy and soft and fluffy, no high heels. And it's been a few years since I've had Facebook at first. It's cool, but then when time went on just the trolling and ridiculous things People posted. I don't have enough friends to worry about that like other people I know, but I just always felt like it was weird, you know, oh look, there's my dinner whoopty do. And? I might have posted something.I thought was interesting.Nothing my friend would say oh I bought a coffee and there'd be like a million likes and stupid comments.And I just thought you know this is not right for me.I really don't need to know the dumb stuff.Everybody's doing or what they're faking doing facebook
I’m about to turn 40 next year. I had a deep, beautiful, and painful, spiritual awakening 7 years back. I also don’t have an emotionally secure or able mother or parental figure in my life. I’ve spent the last 7 years reparenting myself. Your video was really inspiring and surprisingly mothering to me. I’m happy to say that at 39, I’ve nearly stopped doing all the things you listed. But more than that, I found hearing your perspective which has come from experience, really gave me an insight into a benchmark for my own future. So thank you! I’m officially adopting you as my TH-cam mother. Please create more content that younger woman can look to as comfort, inspiration and wisdom, that we can apply to our own lives during these wild and challenging times ❤️
Oh bless you! I am honoured to be regarded as your TH-cam mother! I hope that my content will resonate with young women - and men - as well as others in my age group and hopefully demonstrate the value older people can bring to the table. We can all learn from each other, whatever stage of life we are in. I learn all the time from my children and grandchildren. My eldest child is 40 and his eldest is 18, so I am very lucky to have all those different perspectives to ponder. And hopefully too it will help some people understand what their own mothers might be going through in menopause etc, not to mention co-workers. We can all work together towards a kinder, more loving world. I shall Look out for you on my videos xxx
Agreed, Cosmic! Adopting her as a TH-cam Mom! I could tell I would need to listen to her when I heard some of the slightly painful (in a good way) truths she was saying are hitting home. "Yank" (American) here. With an MA in international politics, as she has.
Yes Yes Yes and all the other points Yes 😃 I am turning 62 in december, gave up my job (which I really loved) two days ago. I was really good at it. But I was not appreciated for it, instead they loaded more and more onto me. I did my fair bit share of work and caring. And doing it for less and lesser money. Enough is enough. The older I get, the more I enjoy life, and I put so many dreams on hold the past 30 years. Now it the time to fulfill them, one by one!
What a great, positive attitude to what could have been a devastating situation. Wishing you all the best with fulfilling those dreams! What’s first? X
I"ve been wearing comfortable clothes for over two decades and that includes the office! That was really the best decision ever. I always look nice and professional. No one knows it's an elastic waistband.
I would just add, stop giving my opinion, to others, even if asked…I surprise myself how invested I am in the person taking my advice, being angry if they dont take it, being right, being defensive
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond when I offered advice and it has not been taken and they come back again to me I typically respond, “you’re smart and resourceful, I’m sure you’ll figure something out”. I’ve even said it to myself, “I’m smart and resourceful, I’ll figure something out” when I’m in what feels like a bind. I also cap the amount of time I listen to the exact same problem on repeated repeat. My time is valuable.
I quit working, retiring early. I quit using alarm clocks; I no longer regulate my time. I quit negative habits, friends; my time is too precious to spend it in negativity. I quit trying to change myself from being introverted and I now embrace that about myself and I quit caring what others think of me.
@@CanadaFree.6014 it's interesting to me that the things I find easy to change can be difficult for someone else. I have two close friends and all others I consider to be acquaintances. Not caring what others think of me was really easy once I retired as was giving up using clocks to determine what I do when.
I can definitely relate to the whole introversion thing. I always felt I had to change and make more of an "effort" when I was younger. Goodness knows why, probably a combination of influences! We live in a world were extroversion is lauded, don't we?
Just found your channel and yes to all. I think the biggest things I have stopped doing in my 50-60's is I have stopped hiding who I am. I say things kindly, avoid confrontational topics if I can, but if they ask, I tell them how I feel.
Hurrah! That’s freeing isn’t it? I’ve noticed in the past that women who speak their truth are often characterised as “difficult” - I think we should reclaim that word and turn it into a compliment!
I’m 67 and have also done many of these. So Liberating! I also have not dyed my hair for almost 8 years. Spent most of my adult life worrying about other peoples opinion of me even though I now appreciate I’m a good person and my own opinion of me is all that really matters. Couple of phrases I live by: those who matter won’t mind and those who mind do t matter. There are billions of people in this world, they won’t all like you and you won’t like all of them!
Im in my 70s. I think the most unsettling thing is that all family and the one frien̈d i had are dead. Just buried the husband. I seemed to think back in my 50s 60s life would be as forever. Also your right about other people. I just let them go if their upset with my way of life and thinking, their not worth the trouble.
I am 57 and what I am practicing these days is not to react or respond to other people’s harsh comments or dramatic behaviour. When someone gives a comment directly at me to make me sad, ashamed, angry or guilty I no longer react., instead I try my best to give a smile and be quiet or give the shortest possible answer. I am now tired of trying to prove myself to certain people as I have understood that their aim is to provoke us and gain some happiness. Sometimes they do that because of their mental state. What I now believe is that what others say or do is what they are going to take with them (their karmic account 😊) and I don’t have to be part of it😊
Good thoughts. Someone told me once, respond rather than react. Which I took to mean step back and if you want to come back to it, you can respond calmly rather than react emotionally in the moment. We are entitled to set boundaries and protect our state of mind. Thank you for watching x
This one. I noticed a cpl years ago. I work in healthcare. People come in grumpy. I just ignore it. Most end up saying sorry because they are hurting, or hungry, or tired, or scared.
Stopped taking interest or running after family or friends. It is way too exhausting and a waste of time. No more rushing around. It drives me crazy. Who needs the stress? I need to work on scrolling on my phone. It is a time suck.
I agree with all of your points. I gave up the uncomfortable clothes/ shoes/ underwear, I gave up the need to explain why I had to say no to something, and I now don’t worry about FOMO … I have now embraced JOMO(the JOY of missing out)😂!
I’ve stopped wearing uncomfortable clothing several years ago only wear things that are either comfortable or I feel good in. I’m working on stopping from apologizing… Especially when passing somebody on the sidewalk like you mentioned… Which also includes not moving off the sidewalk onto the grass just to make way for somebody else.
Sooo guilty of being "sorry" ALL the time. I have even been told by friends to quit saying it. However, still 🫢 saying. You have given me reason to be more conscious of quitting.
@@deborahlanyi5535lol.. maybe yry the old fashioned rubber band on wrist and snap it when you say , sorry or any word etc you don't want to say or do🤔 I'll be trying this also 🌸🕊️
I’m 63 and have done most of the things you suggested. Great ideas. When people try to give me things most of the time I say no thank you. My older family is always trying to give me things. I downsized 2 years ago and got rid of “stuff”. Most of it I didn’t even buy. I hate shopping. My suggestion is Christmas, we no longer exchange gifts in our family, we just buy gifts for the children. Huge amount of stress gone. Now we can enjoy the holiday without so much stress.
That’s a big stress taken away. We have “secret Santa” in our family where we each have one person to buy for, with a cost limit that everyone can afford.
I found your channel this morning and immediately subscribed. I'm also 63 and agree with everything you've said. I'm getting so much better at saying 'no' and I've stopped saying 'sorry' to everyone. I do exercise regularly, but not because of guilt or body issues - I just really enjoy my short runs and long hikes. The big 'quit' which has made me much happier (and I hope healthier) is alcohol. I was only really a social drinker but I've seen how much retired friends are now drinking and just didn't want to go there. I've been alcohol-free for nine months now and love it. 😁
Thank you for subscribing. I found one I hit menopause that I could no longer tolerate much alcohol and it always amazes me how much friends put away! No judgement, just curiosity. 😄 Great that you enjoy exercise x
I am 64 and I recently quit going to bed too late. I am still working and not retiring any time soon. I am now putting myself on a sleep schedule and wake up earlier, and I get so much more done, and feel more energy and clarity. It's a significant change.
I'm 57 and I still stay up way too late. Usually doomscrolling... oops. There are a couple reasons for my late bedtimes, 95% mental, but I really need to work on this.
Same on the clothing....never going back to those uncomfortable choices that we women are supposed to look better in! Good common sense takes, thank-you!
I have just come across your channel. Thank you for this cheerful video 😊. I didn't think number 8 made you sound arrogant at all. And I am glad that we stop listening to other people's opinions when we get to middle age. This is what a friend calls "the priviledge of ageing", when you gain self-confidence. As for watching the news and worrying about the plight of people all over the world... I have spent so much of my life doing this, and to no avail whatsoever (even when trying to make the world a better place) that I am now done with both (watching and worrying). I am in my 50's, and I'm giving up 'romantic' relationships - this is what is making me happier . Friends first.
Thank you for watching! I’ve always thought that the best basis for a romantic relationship is friendship anyway. But the greatest love of all is loving ourselves. X
Hi Jo, a number of your "10" list resonate with me. One thing I am slowly coming to terms with is worrying about things that I cannot change. As my mum used to say, I need to stop crossing bridges before I reach them. 😊
I have “the Serenity Prayer” on my bed side table - are you familiar with it? “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference” I’m not religious, but I like the sentiment. I also practice saying “not my circus, not my monkeys!” Easier said than done at times of course!
The biggest thing I've let go of is allowing other people's bad attitudes get to me. My boundaries are like plexiglass now- transparent and strong at the same time. So freeing- I didn't realize how anxious I was... I also do not judge myself for missing a workout or indulging, because we now trust ourselves to get right back on it. With age comes more reason, patience, and freedom. Oh and btw you had me laughing from beginning to end- I subbed within the first 10 minutes of lmao.
“Reason, patience and freedom” - YES! 🙌🏻 I do amuse myself. While my mouth was running with the cheese grater analogy, my brain was going “stop talking about your knickers!!!”
I have finally found someone who speaks well and is not spouting the same things as other are on you tube. Your content was refreshingly new but very valid in this day and age. Thank you.
I am 61 n retired, totally concur with your list and pretty much have done the same stuff!!!! Financially we are very comfortable, but I dress like a bum n drive my ol’ rusty Chevy truck! Not only do I say no, but f-k no!!!!! 😍
Great list! I also got rid of ALL social media. Don’t get me wrong: I liked Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok but was spending way too much time scrolling and then wondering why I didn’t have to time to do things I actually enjoyed: reading, journaling, and crafting. Because I’d sit down for 15 minutes, start scrolling, look up and an hour or 2 had passed!
Love this video Jo, and I’m happy to have found your channel. One thing (other than your 10) that I’ve been doing absolutely forever that I’ve stopped doing, is being responsible for everything. Nobody in my family can be bothered organising things, so they wait for me to. It’s the one I’ve found the toughest to stop because I like things to get done.
I totally agree. Saying I'm sorry all the time, worrying about growing older and feeling guilty and beating myself up is what I do on a daily basis. But you are so right I can change these things and you have encouraged me to do so. Thank you for sharing this with me. I am 59 and it's time to stop doing the things that make me miserable. I hope you have a wonderful New Year.😊
I am working on numbers eight and nine, plus a slight variation on these that is to stop imagining what other people might think. This has helped me to pluck up the courage to start my TH-cam channel (3 months ago) and to publish a family memoir (my final draft is out for review with family and friends). I could never have done either of these things when I was younger!
No. 9 & No. 10 has really resonated with me. At 56 I think those are two areas to work on. I started worrying about aging when I turned 55. Got to bounce back coz I plan to be an energetic 80 / 90 year old!
Your video really resonated with me, Jo. I find number 9 the hardest and do beat myself up / analyse how the day’s gone, thinking could I have done things better. Absolutely agree on the comfy clothes and shoes too! Thanks for sharing your list. ❤
What a great list, pretty much all of them resonated. Especially stopping saying Sorry. You've definitely got as much right to that pavement as anyone else :)
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond We really do. I'm only 5 ft and when some big bloke shoulders me in the street, it's ridiculous that I'm the one that automatically says sorry! :)
Hi Jo, loving your video! I'm only 51 and I've already given up watching the news, no television ( apart from The Chase at teatime) and no Facebook ( seeing other people's amazing lives, families, social lives etc made me feel inadequate) Ive also given up feeling guilty about sitting and devouring a whole big bar of Galaxy all to myself 😂
@@sassyfrasti Galaxy is the most amazing chocolate. It melts in the mouth and you just can't stop eating it until you realise you've finished the whole large bar all to yourself 🤤
Just found your channel. Your is the first list of this type that I completely agree with. And even better, I appreciate how you present it as what you do for yourself and not as advice to others or as what others *should* do. I’ve been watching similar videos a lot lately and most all of them present as advice. I love your vulnerability and humbleness.
Thank you. I’m so glad that’s how it came across. I’d hate to feel that it seems as if I think I know better. I will use your comment to keep me humble.
I love that phrase! I have those too 😉 my grandson once called the creases round my eyes “crinkles” which I thought was rather lovely - the perspective of child! 💖
62 and agree with you! I try and get good sleep, best food possible, super cozy clothes, stay away from news n well, people, so no frequently, stopped "just shopping", stopped looking for that right guy, retired and now working on clearing out things I don't need in my house.
There’s a wonderful song by Pink that goes “I can buy myself flowers, write my name in the sand, talk to myself for hours, I can hold my own hand…” do you know it? Your list reminded me of that - self nurturing. Thanks for sharing!
@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond I do know the song. I started this journey to find ME long ago with Marianne Williamson then it just snow balled. I do watch Mel Robbins frequently and listen to very calming music. As my 3 children grew up n moved on I had to too lol. Had my forst at 19 so had zero clue who I was. I know now lol.
Brilliant advice, thanks 🙏I have given up alcohol and toxic friendships. Scrolling on the phone and the news is a good one too. ❤️🙏 Thanks for making this video. You are amazing for your age, very vibrant. I have quit looking for love which has made me happier and embraced being single. I have learnt love is within me.
I've stopped engaging in conversations, usually over the phone with certain family members who want to rehash the past, how they were wronged in some way or even trying to get me to re live past situations. I simply say it was bad enough the first time, why put myself through negative emotions again, I don't have time for it. Move on, learn from it and put past hurts behind.
For a long time I was one of those people who struggled to move on from past hurts. I finally feel free after letting go. Our brains don’t know the difference between what’s real and what is imagined when it comes to the rush of stress hormones we experience, so I can imagine the relief you must have felt on drawing that boundary 💐
same here! Left him after 15 years (10 years ago), and started living. In the last 10 years, I've done all the things mentioned in the video too, love my life!
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond leaving is the easy part. The tough part is all the years trying to make it work, protecting the kids, and finally, finding the courage to give up and walk out.
At 56, I just had this moment of “I’m not what I planned to be,” and I was troubled about disappointing myself, not being a professional screen writer. I realized that the push and shove and fight of the business is not how I want to live my life. However, as I plan for retirement after 30 years as an English professor, I’m looking for what would engage me, not feel stressful, feel meaningful and fun., be creative but not way out of my abilities, contribute but not depress me. I’m still thinking and have four more years to ponder and discover.
I’m working from home for a time, and I LOVE my hoodie sweatshirts, spending time with my husband, yoga pants, boundaries with people, four cups of coffee in the morning, reading books, my gardening/ grounding time, my lovely career and sunshine 🥴
Can relate to all 10. I don't suffer fools gladly. No 9 I've only just started doing and no 10 I'm working on. I've also given up drinking alcohol on a regular basis, high days and holidays for me and feel so much better for it .
I found I could no longer tolerate alcohol during perimenopause - not uncommon, apparently. So even on high days and holidays it's only one drink for me! I know a lot of women who say they feel better for stopping altogether. Not always easy, eh? Thanks for taking the time to comment.
@@roslinney4285 yup 👍 to the "given up alcohol". March this year I said goodbye and thanks for the parties through my life, but now I want to walk another path...(and get my sunday mornings back) 🙏💖
I'm grateful for this. My mom and mom-in-law are passed on. I often wish I had a more mature perspective to reference. Thank you for putting this out there so I have a reference point. Some of those I've already done. Some I hope to do. I'm glad that the physical discomfort of the fifties passes. That is good news!
Thank you so much. Really appreciate the fact that you chose to air your thoughts explicitly. I too am heading towards my 60th birthday. So this really makes a lot of sense to me. I too have things which I need to be assertive of, to be able to say NO and also not to feel guilty for things I said or did which were well intentioned. Thank you so much once again. I wish you all the very best in life 💖
I’m 62 years old, but I still acting like young adult, and don’t‘t give up things, love to shopping, ware new clothing every week, back to school study medical terminology, and hanging around with younger friends, the result is that I feel young and look young. Please don’t give up !
Lovely post! I am 61 and gone through the same list. Stopped trying to be the pleaser, fixer, carer etc. To lose lifelong self conciousness I've started my youtube channel too which is boosting my new found "me", unfettered by worrying what others think. I'm doing the decluttering thing too..feels great! That includes cancelling our tv licence so I just watch things I'm interested in on youtube, which has been liberating. Well done you.
lol- your #1 makes me smile because at 55, I stopped buying uncomfortable clothes. I just turned 56, and only want cotton and linen. No matter how cute or pretty a piece of clothing is, if it’s not natural fabric, I will not get it. Thank you
Hi Jo, I just found your channel and it was such a nice surprise! Your list is precious and I fully agree with it. I'm 57 and it's such a relief to get rid of such useless things or mindsets!! Thank you ❤
Hi! I love your list of 10 things you quit. I stopped being friends with people that were so negative and just complain. I’m a happy person and I wanted to stop being around these sort of people. I’ve never done Facebook because I felt it was a waste of time. I don’t do Netflix because I don’t want to get hooked on a show and then binge watch if I missed an episode. I quit listening to people. After two divorces, I quit looking for a man. I’m happy doing things by myself or with friends. I like coming home and enjoying my peace and quiet.
Even 18 months + into retirement I find myself needing to remember it’s ok to slow down - in a hurry is a default setting more than 30 years in a high stress job, raising two kids and being the primary caregiver for aging parents who’s have both now passed meant I was constantly behind, always needing to do more - it’s so strange not rushing all the time - I’m still figuring it out
I think the nervous system takes its time to catch up! Once it does, you feel as though you can breathe so much more deeply. Thank you for watching and sharing 💐
You are so right about the news. 9/11 was also the first time I was glued to the news stations- I was actually just talking about this the other day. I never have the news on these days. I will check the news from time to time by going to the website to read but that’s it. I actually avoid people who are obsessed with the news now. I’ve given up explaining my choices. I use to give an explanation for everything- if i declined an invitation, I would say why. If someone gave me a compliment on my outfit- I would go in to detail of where I bought it and the sale price ect. I just don’t do that anymore. New subscriber here ❤
In my 60s I quit shopping 🛍️ for clothes, I now make my own. (I haven’t sewn since high-school!) A terrific brain-busting mental exercise regimen. I get to pick fabrics in color I love, make comfortable styles ❤❤❤ The other thing I’m working on is when I make a positive observation I don’t add (… for your age). (example) I just say “Sheila looks great in that dress”!!! Age doesn’t matter. ❤❤❤
The “for your age” thing is a bit of a bugbear of mine - such a backhanded compliment! I love that you’ve combined quitting something with a new hobby and a positive outcome. Thanks for sharing.
I’m 60 and I’ve really been worried about growing older. I have the same thoughts that you described. It was an eye opener for me when you said: “ why waste time worrying- life is too short.” Thank you for posting. I subscribed.
I am practicing giving things up 😅 I'm trying not to beat myself up as much. I agree about uncomfortable clothes and footwear. I think Jo you have nailed a lot of what I'm trying to do. I have just quit a recent job after a week as I realised it was not for me and this was a massive thing for me to do. The relief was immense, much happier and also know something new about myself too.
Yes! I gave up on fussy clothing in my 40's. Love to be comfy! #9...Amen! Good advice. And you have a great voice for this. So bouncy and joyful! Lovely! I'm also learning to give up looking to other people for validation and look instead to God for my worth and value. Psalm 139:14 "I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made."
Brava ! Well done & cheers from across the pond in Buffalo, New York ( right near Canada, & Niagara Falls). Ahhh … you are a delight. I’m 64 & I fully agree. My dear late Mom - & my Nana - were British born & raised so I also love your accent ! Jolly good ! I grew up with it. 1st time viewer here & new subscriber. Thank you for this. Love , Liz
Love this! Hello from Southwest Michigan, USA! Great food for thought. Agree with all of it. Most I do now at 62, and I think started up come naturally with age, and yes, wisdom! Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed it a lot! And Happy New Year to you!
Howdy, some great points, I'm 60 and feel time is running out, it's something That has hit me at 60. Worrying, I'm getting ride of stuff on one hand but have got some on the other, I say no as well now, I do think more about what I want. Selfish maybe? I'm on my own now due to tragic circumstances, Love the vlog will tune in again. David 😊
I think we’ve earned the right to be for self-ish, don’t you? 🤩 As for time running out, you might enjoy my video “The New “Old” - a different perspective. Thanks for watching. 👀
I gave up wearing uncomfortable shoes years ago. I may have been in my 40s. I also ditched uncomfortable underwear. That soon extended to all clothing. If it itches, pinches or rubs, I won't wear it. If I don't like how it feels, I don't buy it. I'm struggling with not buying stuff. I have well and truly reached the stage of getting rid of stuff, but I was recluttering faster than I was decluttering. I'm doing a no-spend month this month, and I've been so surprised by how many times I've had the impulse to purchase things. There's a bunch of stuff in my Amazon cart as we speak.
I think we’ve reached a point of consumption saturation, but it’s like an addiction- we’re conditioned to want more! At least you’re wearing comfortable clothes 😅
I just loved your thoughts and advice. I'm Turing 59 this year and it was just what i needed to hear. Thank you for saying the brain fog began to clear in your 60s. That had really been a worry point in my 50s. I'm looking forward to more of your advice and good thoughts.
@@lisawool5855 the brain fog is scary, isn’t it? I wouldn’t say I’m 100% clear headed, but at 63 I’m definitely less foggy than 5 years ago. thank you for watching - I’ll look out for you xx
Lovely to watch your videos and just like you talk with me! I like your way of laughing. Great idea to quit the things you don't need or don't like anymore! I am not ready to stop say sorry and start to say no. Since Covid 19 I quit eating our with friends; I quit window shopping; I quit watching TV (but TH-cam which I found you!); I quit wearing skirt/dress everyday (I wear black pants and black top which make me simple and elegant); I quit collecting things; I quit buying Xmas card; I quit burying luxury stuff; I quit chasing thins.Again thank for sharing good stuff. xoxo
I have just come across your video, it spoke volumes 💪🏽I will 61years in the next 2 months the best biggest present I have given myself is letting my workmates know that, I am just a colleague and not more than that! I have given away most of my shoes that made uncomfortable, and those I haven’t used in the last 2 years plus the clothes. I feel free and more happy. Wishing you all the best in your next adventure. Xx
I'm sorry it took you to 61 to not fraternise with your work colleagues. I'm a huge introvert and when I was in my early 30s I was working in a giant medical research lab. There were 400 researchers under one roof and it was always a huge relief to go home and be alone with my pets and husband. A colleague was having a milestone birthday party and she kept hassling people to confirm they were coming. She giddily said to me: Are you coming to my party? My reply: I don't socialise. 🤣
Great list that I could agree with easily. The way I look at aging now is that it is to be celebrated, a lot of people don’t get this far! Ps currently clearing my wardrobe of clothes that don’t make me feel good. 😊
@@sarahclayton3330 few weeks ago I heard Jane Fonda saying something like:" Anyone can be young - only the lucky gets to be old" and I just love that 💖
Thanks to pandemic “lockdown” my feet became comfortable and healthy. When we began work again, I gave up on professional scrunching shoes. I wear nice sneakers with my suits.
🙌🏻 good for you! The last time I wore a heel I was in boots. Slipped in a polished floor and my foot went one way and my ankle the other - ouch! Never again!
You are very pleasant. Enjoyed watching your video. Thank you. Like many here, I am stopping colouring my hair, going out more with people who matter and stopped expecting validation from others. Getting rid of stuff.
This was brilliant, I can add I gave up wearing a bra, despite people’s opinions. They’re welcome to their own opinions, but I’ll stick to feeling more comfortable lol. Also, I’m trying with number 10 :), and doom scrolling. Deleting my news apps! Thanks for this :)
I'd do the same, but I'm worried I might knock myself out if I jump up suddenly! 🙃Seriously, I do wear unwired regularly. I think it's much healthier. THanks for watching! x
Oh, me too! I do put on a bra if I want to feel respectable. If I go out to dinner, or to see a professional. But not one of those underwire jobs. No. Never again!
Me too! I’m 58, stopped wearing a bra about 10 years ago. I wear soft tank tops. I love when I go to the doctor or somewhere and they say remove this article of clothing, but you can keep your bra on, I proudly say, “I don’t wear a bra” and smile!
Just found you as you popped up on my feed. I'm 62 and love your points. No more tight jeans for me, no more people pleasing, reduced advert watching, seriously reduced mainstream TV. Given up the swimming pool for wild swimming with fins on. Still working on giving up caring what people think but I'm getting there. No noisy cafes with people coughing right next to you, i get up and move somewhere else. Oh what freedom comes with midlife onwards!
I love this! And wild swimming - I love the idea, but I’m far too soft! I wonder if you might enjoy this conversation I had with Melina Abbott who is also a convert? th-cam.com/video/C3vqxmELBSA/w-d-xo.htmlsi=COhTfHuLz13CyE9a
Just stumbled upon your channel. Love it. So agree. Since I retired, my motto has become, "I'm as busy as I want to be." I stay active but I choose where I will expend my energy. 🙂
What have you given up that makes you happier? I meant to say as part of number nine, I’ve stopped beating myself up for missing an exercise session, or eating pudding! I concentrate on adding good stuff to my diet rather than denying myself a biscuit!
just found your channel , i agree and understand everything you've said ! i'm just 62 a few weeks ago 🥰
@@BethanyLloyd-h6t happy belated birthday! 🎂 thanks for watching. Anything you’d add?
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond Hi , thank you ! i think you covered nearly everything but i will have a think if there's anything i've changed since hitting 60 ! 😊
I should have included 'Quit the news' on my list. 😂
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond what a awesome advice! i will definitely need to review my list, and start quitting all those things that make life miserable.
1. Uncomfortable clothing
2. Rushing
3. Apologizing all the time
4. Saying yes all the time
5. Doom scrolling
6. Buying stuff I dont need
7. Watching the news
8. Listening to other people's opinions (trust own instincts)
9. Stopped self ceiticism/guilt
10. Worrying about aging
👍🏻
YES!
Thank you for the short version!
Wow simply Superb . Thank you
Thanks. 😊
Hi Jo,
I really like this video.
When my wonderful wife of 42 years passed away, I sold the car, sold the TV, quit my job, and gave away all of the Christmas decorations, including the tree.
I ride my bicycle 8 - 10 miles daily and walk to nearby stores for groceries, etc..
And regarding my friends and my brother, I don't put the key to my happiness in someone else's pocket.
@@frankducett9 I’m so sorry for your loss. It puts everything into perspective, doesn’t it? Fundamentally, we don’t need half the things we think we do. Wishing you well.
Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket 😊
I am very sorry for your loss.
Well said, Frank!
I am so sorry for your loss. All the best as you face forward.
Good general advice.
I believe we go through 3 phases;wanting stuff, acquiring stuff and then starting to let of stuff.
Yes. That’s certainly been my experience!
Yes, yes! I think the same ;)
@@Haidakhan1008 😆 I've had the very same experience. Much prefer the third and last phase; so I'll hang around here, as long as I get to live the precious Life 💖
100%! I'm finally in the letting stuff go phase!
I sure hope I'm at the getting rid of phase. 53, and finally stopped online shopping. Thanks for the video.
I stopped dying my hair. I now enjoy the grey/white. And that is saving me a lot of time and money.
Time, money and chemicals! I've stopped too, at least for now. I'm curious to see what happens. I'd prefer white to grey, but we'll see what comes. And I can't promise I won't ever dye again, but I'd like to stay the course!
Me too! No more hair color. Do I miss the "brown"? Sometimes. But I do not miss all that wasted time in the beauty shop, spending the money every month to have my hair colored & worrying about my roots showing 2 weeks later. It's very freeing not to worry about hair.
Same
Have just made the decision to do this too. Happy to be grey or white, just scared of the transition.😂😂
@@janetbennell9855. I did this a few years ago and *knew* I would be unhappy for the 2 years it takes to grow it all the way out. So many women cave during this stage because you will never like the gray/white/silver against the “old” dyed hair. I grew mine out about an inch then found an excellent stylist who stripped the dye out of my hair (heavily conditioned it with Olaplex for a month prior), then toned it silver. I loved it but I will say that phase had challenges as well because the silver color doesn’t stay. It eventually turns yellowish (the bleach coming through). It took some experimenting and I don’t even recall what all products I used now to get through it but sometimes I wasn’t happy with the yellow but it was *much* better than the half gray/half dyed look. It was expensive, but for me it was worth it. I do not miss dying my hair!
One of the most liberating things I’ve done at the age of 65 is to no longer have to put up with an old friend and his wife who really annoy me. They brag. They have a smug face. They think they’re better than everyone else and they think the world revolves around them. She can talk about herself all night and is the most “me me me” person I’ve ever met. Well, after a 40 year friendship, I’ve given them the boot. It’s not the best thing in life to effectively sack friends but I’m just not prepared to have to endure them anymore. I feel happier, less burdened and other friends who also know them have praised me for being honest and direct whilst they remain two faced and scared to upset anyone. You’re right, life is too short. It’s too short to waste time with people who drag you down and upset you.
40 years is long enough, my friend. Not everyone is meant to be a “friend for life”. Brave decision, but clearly the right one for you! 👍🏻
I need to do this! Well done x
At 60 I became a Believer in the Lord Jesus' as such all my former friends became irrelevant.
I went on to make a few new friends
Today my Bible is my best friend
I finally disconnected from a friend of 50 years, I feel so much better, I felt because we had years of history together that I had to be her BFF, when I realized how she was so opposite from me, I broke ties and I'm happier without having to talk to her.
Amen! Preach it. Life is too short to willingly spend time n the company of people you hate or have no respect for (unless you're getting a paid to do it!)😂
50 years ago when I was a teen, an older person told me, “the less people know about you, the better off you are “. I have lived by that and tried to teach my kids that. This is important at any age.
Given that I’ve just kind of launched a part of my life here on this channel, it would be hypocritical of me to say I agree, but I do n’t disagree. I think the key is to share what we want to be known. And protect the rest.
Damn right sister........
❤
@@oliviafebo67 Thank you
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond...Very true statement.
I quit making early morning appointments. My motto is “No appointments before noon.” This allows me to have a relaxing start to my day and lots of “me time” in the morning.
I'm retired and I also decided that I didn't have to get up for ridiculously early appointments - my motto is unless someone is paying me to come to an early appointment I'm not doing it anymore.
Exactly! I used to bend over backwards to accommodate people like letting repair men come whenever they wanted to. Now I only allow appointments to happen at a time that works for me. It has made a big difference in my stress levels.
@@siobhanboyle8105 that’s a good, practical “quit”. 🌷thanks for sharing!
@@dsmith9796 good for you! Living to the beat of your own drum. 🥁
@@siobhanboyle8105 yes! Why on earth do we put everyone else’s schedule before our own - as if their’s is more important?
I stopped ALL news 6 yrs ago.
The positive impact it has had on my mental health is unbelievable.
I think I'll make a separate video about this down the line - maybe the world wouldn't be such an angry place if more people took a step back.
The moment I start watching the news I get angry, trying to reign it in
Good idea. My husband watches it all day as (he says) he needs to be up to the minute for his day-trading. He can have it because I now realise how much of the news just brings a person down, down down. Now I just watch the nightly news on one channel & that is enough. My mental health has gone through the roof since not watching so much news! It can make you really ,really angry and disappointed in human kind.
I quit watching the News in 1994. My son was born & I felt that I was bombarded without warning. I didn’t want my son to see it as he came in the room. Best thing I ever did! I keep up to date on line on my time & not the stations.
Omg yes, that’s right
lol- your #1 makes me smile because at 55, I stopped buying uncomfortable clothes. I just turned 56, and only want cotton and linen. No matter how cute or pretty a piece of clothing is, if it’s not natural fabric, forget it! Thank you for sharing your list.
That's a good point - yes! I prefer natural fabrics. And they have to be soft, not stiff. Thank you for watching. Glad I made you smile x
Where do you buy your clothes? I'm finding it's harder to find cotton clothes.
I gave up ironing in my early 50s, haven’t ironed a thing since then, now in my 60s. So unfortunately natural fabrics wouldn’t look good on me but I understand where you are coming from.
@@sharlesb7735 I've gone a bit crinkly, I'm afraid 🙃
I gave up high maintenance friends and am so much happier!
There comes a point where we come first, doesn’t there?
I don't have high maintenance friends but high maintenance parents...
Yes this!!. 😊
That must be hard. Is it because they haven’t been able to let go?
I think I realized they were sucking the life out of me. I needed to accept the fact that there was no added value in our relationship.
I gave up being in or pursuing relationships with men when I turned 50. I gave the last one his marching orders. I'm almost 54 now and I'm blissfully single. No longer are my decisions based on what a man might thinks about me. I'm also wealthier for not being in a relationship, because somehow, no matter how wealthy they are, I'm poorer! Not just monetary, but time and energy. What the hell was all that last 30-odd years about? I'm trying to make the most of what time I've got left, and a 'romantic' relationship is not on the agenda. I'm as likely to finding one that enhances my life as winning the lottery.
Right there with you at 50! ❤
It sounds like you've found a sense of freedom that opens all kinds of possibilities!
I am right there with you! Same age, too.
I’m right there with you sister! I found true happiness when I realized pursuing a relationship with men caused me much confusion and unhappiness. I am so much more fulfilled and happy without them. I play pickleball and have guy friends, which is all I need plus family and great girlfriends .
I hear you sister! I'm with you on that at 53 🎉😊
I let my hair go grey and am growing it out. I looove it! It's midback and I no longer care that some people may think I am too old for it. I have given up bitterness and try my best to practice forgiveness, quickly. I smile more and practice gratefulness for everything God has blessed me with. I made peace with my beautiful sisters. They are my best friends now. I read God's word more. I am more centered, peaceful and less anxious. I'm working on worrying less. Changing my worry list to a prayer list 😊 I am becoming fearless with God's help.🎉🎉🎉❤❤❤ Thank you for your awesome channel🎉
@@thelionandthebee1933 I love that you feel more centred, peaceful and less anxious! Recognising bitterness, never mind letting it go is an art. I’m glad your faith helps you x
This is the best comment I've ever read on TH-cam. Just wonderful and thank you for posting it!
This sounds wise!!! 🙏🏻🤍
I really love this comment. I am 60 and need- and want- to change things in my life, let go of things/habits/patrerns etc that don't serve me. I need to be more free. Your comment about making peace with your sisters especially resonated with me as I am pretty much estranged from both of mine. There are good reasons but it makes me sad all the same. We live in a triangle around the world far apart from each and at the moment I have little contact with either of them yet one of them I grew up with like a twin and we were so close well into our 30s. I would love to find the way to make peace before one of us leaves this earth.🙏
@taramatheis1451 Blessings, Miss Tara. My sweet Mami, before going Home to Heaven, asked me to "behave like the eldest. Do not expect her to change. You change. Become a peacemaker. Stop being a fighter." 87 year old Mami's. Phew. I began by not responding to my beautiful sister's offenses. She'd mouth off, and I would stay quiet. But began praying that God would speak to her heart. The silence worked! When my voice (and my comments) were not there to fight with, she could hear God's still, small voice, and examine her actions clearer. She began to apologize to me. I was shocked. The other thing that I did, knowing us sweet sisters, I told her (at an appropriate time:), in a soft voice, that I knew she had said harmful things about me and that I forgive her. Now, gulp. I said that I forgave her for the past things she has said AND for any future things she will say. And that I loved her. There was denial from her re: any harmful comments said. But that's OK. She heard and felt what I had said. And I meant it. We pray daily together now. Just a short 3 minute prayer over the phone after we share what'sgoing on in our lives. Once in a while the enemy tries to get in there and cause trouble between us. We recognize his games. We step back and pray some more. I pray that you and your sisters will come together once more. When we were fighting and struggling with misunderstandings, I used to say to my sister, "What must God want to accomplish with you and I together, if the enemy is working so hard at separating us!" May the Lord bless you, sweet Miss Tara. You all will be in our prayers. The world is turning upside down. We need a lot of love and support to get through this. Blessings to you. Shine on!
Top few on my list. I quit Facebook, I don’t need my head full of other peoples curated lives and don’t want to advertise mine.. I also now have no problem saying no to things I don’t want to do as I spent far too many years being a people pleaser. I’ve quit putting myself down. When people say I like your top I used to say I look a bit fat in it. Now I just say thank you.
That's great! "what? This old thing?" I know it!
Same here, I know it sounds crazy but I feel freedom in a more fulfilling way than when I was younger. I am 63, by the way....
Not crazy at all - we have "become" who we are meant to be. Feels good!
❤🎉LOVE you dear ❤🎉
never had it 😂
Things 'I" gave up at 62....my job. My alarm clock. My routine, my depression, my work wardrobe...aaah.
Wonderful! Your words made me want to breathe a sigh of relief with you! I stopped using an alarm a while ago too. Bliss.
Goodbye tension, hello pension!
❤❤❤
@@lisaniermann4103 😄
Good for youuu....👍. I wish I could. But since I was wasteful with my money and own no house / flat, I have to work until official retirement. Thank goodness I like my work and it's only 3 years to go.
I'm 66. I gave up reading newspapers when I was 50. Then at 53, I donated the TV to our gardner. Then at 60, I quit facebook and insta.
Now, I do yoga, crochet, read, go bird watching, paint, hike, road trips and sometimes, sit quietly and watch the sun set. Slow living is the key today, for me.
That's a very deliberate progression - I applaud you! I haven't given up TV, though I am very selective about what I watch. But I am with you on the slow living - I feel so much calmer and more connected to what matters when I slow down. x
What a beautiful way to live ❤
@@Pintz001 yes, slow living proved to be a rewarding lifestyle
New subscriber here. 🙂 I'm 63 and have stopped watching not only the news but ANY commercial television. I use Netflix because there are no ads. I don't like Amazon Prime video because they force ads, so when I really want to watch something on there, I mute the ads and avert my eyes so none of the marketing gets into my head. My approach seems extreme to some, but we are bombarded with marketing all day, whether we're in public or in our homes, and I refuse to participate in it any longer! A couple days ago I was in the waiting room of the car dealership as my car was being repaired, and I had to endure an hour of live television, which was loaded with vile election commercials. I was almost ready to run out of there screaming.
Good point! I record live TV exactly so I can fast forward through the ads! At least on TH-cam you only have to endure them for a few seconds before you can press "skip".
I thought I was the only one who did that!😂 Muting the ads!
I pay for TH-cam to avoid commercials. We have internet and no other commercial television.
I'm your age and right there with you!!! 🥂 I am absolutely ALLERGIC to a blapping TV. I stay off Facebook for the same reason. It takes up real estate in my head and is depressing, but do have an old anonymous alternate account that is subscribed to groups of interest. No friends on there.
I'm with you. I also mute the ads, and/or change the channel.
I absolutely don't watch news.
I go outside, if possible, so I don't have to watch the TV at the car dealership. Life is too short to put up with shtuff!
I was doom-scrolling when I found your video 😂
😂
Me too!!! I spend WAY too much time on YT, FB and Instagram, putting off hobbies and social events. Think I'll take a fast from all 3...
@@barbaras676 glad you found me before your fast 😉
Same 🎉
At 65 I have given up wearing heavy denim jeans!!! Lightweight knit pull-ons from here on out! I’ve also in the process of wearing far less makeup than I used to. I’m retired now and a full face of makeup no longer makes sense and takes up too much of my time. I’m becoming accustomed to my own face with just a few products that go on super easy.
YES - I wear very little make-up. Mainly because I have a head full of magic and forget a lot of the time, but also because I think we, as a society, need to get used to seeing what 60, 40, 50, 70 year old faces look like!
I made this short film in 2020 about a photo project I did, making portraits of women 40 plus without their make up. There's a book too. You might enjoy it when you're sitting down with a cuppa! th-cam.com/video/X6k4wHaq9gg/w-d-xo.html
I feel I look ridiculous in makeup now …… a dab of tinted moisturiser does it for me.
I just watched it and loved it! So much of it spoke to me.
I struggle with eye make-up now
I too have quit wearing jeans. I think when women hit a certain age jeans no longer look nice and they aren’t comfortable. I have also cut back on makeup…less is more.
Love your list. I've given up people pleasing, always saying yes. No, it's a complete sentence. 😊
People pleasing defined me for years. I wouldn't say I'm cured, but I'm definitely "in recovery"! Thanks for watching.
Same!!! At 58 I want comfort, health and happiness.
A perfect trio! Thank you! 🙏
And comfortable shoes!
It's funny, I (61) can confirm each of your points 100%. Isn't it wonderful to be in this Age? I have never been so self-confident and self-determined in my life❤
Yes! I so agree. Thank you for watching and sharing your thoughts!
Brilliant list! I’m in my 70s and have worked through some of these already. Comfortable clothes was first on my lit once I reached my 50s! I’m declutterring my house at present. Every item that leaves is a small liberation! Still have things to work on, but I’m of your mind for sure!
Decluttering feels so good, doesn’t it?
I always said if leggings go out of style. I will still wear them after being younger. Wearing high heels and tight dresses and jeans. And as us girls know no I want everything. Comfy and soft and fluffy, no high heels. And it's been a few years since I've had Facebook at first. It's cool, but then when time went on just the trolling and ridiculous things People posted. I don't have enough friends to worry about that like other people I know, but I just always felt like it was weird, you know, oh look, there's my dinner whoopty do. And?
I might have posted something.I thought was interesting.Nothing my friend would say oh I bought a coffee and there'd be like a million likes and stupid comments.And I just thought you know this is not right for me.I really don't need to know the dumb stuff.Everybody's doing or what they're faking doing facebook
I’m about to turn 40 next year. I had a deep, beautiful, and painful, spiritual awakening 7 years back. I also don’t have an emotionally secure or able mother or parental figure in my life. I’ve spent the last 7 years reparenting myself. Your video was really inspiring and surprisingly mothering to me. I’m happy to say that at 39, I’ve nearly stopped doing all the things you listed. But more than that, I found hearing your perspective which has come from experience, really gave me an insight into a benchmark for my own future. So thank you! I’m officially adopting you as my TH-cam mother. Please create more content that younger woman can look to as comfort, inspiration and wisdom, that we can apply to our own lives during these wild and challenging times ❤️
Oh bless you! I am honoured to be regarded as your TH-cam mother! I hope that my content will resonate with young women - and men - as well as others in my age group and hopefully demonstrate the value older people can bring to the table. We can all learn from each other, whatever stage of life we are in. I learn all the time from my children and grandchildren. My eldest child is 40 and his eldest is 18, so I am very lucky to have all those different perspectives to ponder. And hopefully too it will help some people understand what their own mothers might be going through in menopause etc, not to mention co-workers. We can all work together towards a kinder, more loving world. I shall
Look out for you on my videos xxx
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond wonderful intentions Jo 🤍 I look forward to more of your grounded and thoughtful insights 🤍
Agreed, Cosmic! Adopting her as a TH-cam Mom! I could tell I would need to listen to her when I heard some of the slightly painful (in a good way) truths she was saying are hitting home. "Yank" (American) here. With an MA in international politics, as she has.
@@user-po4jj9cx9l well I suppose that makes you my TH-cam Bro 😎 I’m in South Africa. Currently 1/3rd of my way through my masters in life on Earth ⚡️
Welcome! Good to be adopted (just so long as I don't have to feed you all!)
Yes Yes Yes and all the other points Yes 😃 I am turning 62 in december, gave up my job (which I really loved) two days ago. I was really good at it. But I was not appreciated for it, instead they loaded more and more onto me. I did my fair bit share of work and caring. And doing it for less and lesser money. Enough is enough. The older I get, the more I enjoy life, and I put so many dreams on hold the past 30 years. Now it the time to fulfill them, one by one!
What a great, positive attitude to what could have been a devastating situation. Wishing you all the best with fulfilling those dreams! What’s first? X
I"ve been wearing comfortable clothes for over two decades and that includes the office! That was really the best decision ever. I always look nice and professional. No one knows it's an elastic waistband.
😃 exactly!
I would just add, stop giving my opinion, to others, even if asked…I surprise myself how invested I am in the person taking my advice, being angry if they dont take it, being right, being defensive
A relative says, “my opinion is worth something, that shit could change their lives, I’m not giving that shit away for free anymore”.
That’s a hard one - to offer advice and detach from the outcome. Essential though eh?
Knowing our worth is a rare attribute I think!
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond when I offered advice and it has not been taken and they come back again to me I typically respond, “you’re smart and resourceful, I’m sure you’ll figure something out”. I’ve even said it to myself, “I’m smart and resourceful, I’ll figure something out” when I’m in what feels like a bind. I also cap the amount of time I listen to the exact same problem on repeated repeat. My time is valuable.
I quit working, retiring early. I quit using alarm clocks; I no longer regulate my time. I quit negative habits, friends; my time is too precious to spend it in negativity. I quit trying to change myself from being introverted and I now embrace that about myself and I quit caring what others think of me.
@@CanadaFree.6014 it's interesting to me that the things I find easy to change can be difficult for someone else. I have two close friends and all others I consider to be acquaintances. Not caring what others think of me was really easy once I retired as was giving up using clocks to determine what I do when.
I can definitely relate to the whole introversion thing. I always felt I had to change and make more of an "effort" when I was younger. Goodness knows why, probably a combination of influences! We live in a world were extroversion is lauded, don't we?
It's all a work in progress, isn't it? I'm so glad to see you two talking to each other here!
@@katieallen3927 Fantastic!!!! Yyyyayyy!
My husband and I also retired early. We would get "oh wow you are so young I wish I could " if you can you should that's what I would say.
I really need to stop rushing and buying stuff i do not need. I stopped watching the news long ago and i feel better for it.
It’s too easy to press that by button, isn’t it?
Just found your channel and yes to all. I think the biggest things I have stopped doing in my 50-60's is I have stopped hiding who I am. I say things kindly, avoid confrontational topics if I can, but if they ask, I tell them how I feel.
Hurrah! That’s freeing isn’t it? I’ve noticed in the past that women who speak their truth are often characterised as “difficult” - I think we should reclaim that word and turn it into a compliment!
@@alisonschooley5459 excellent!!
I’m 67 and have also done many of these. So
Liberating! I also have not dyed my hair for almost 8 years. Spent most of my adult life worrying about other peoples opinion of me even though I now appreciate I’m a good person and my own opinion of me is all that really matters. Couple of phrases I live by: those who matter won’t mind and those who mind do t matter. There are billions of people in this world, they won’t all like you and you won’t like all of them!
Yes! I love your quotes and am with you all the way with the liberation!
Im in my 70s. I think the most unsettling thing is that all family and the one frien̈d i had are dead. Just buried the husband. I seemed to think back in my 50s 60s life would be as forever. Also your right about other people. I just let them go if their upset with my way of life and thinking, their not worth the trouble.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Julia. And yes, letting go of vexatious people is so much better for us!
Or you see how some people live much longer then they would like with dementia,etc.
Dementia is a cruel, cruel thing, isn't it?
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond Yes. My mom has it and I know she would hate to be like she is. She is now having hallucinations and is agitated.
@@tigertbalm I am so sorry. Sending love to you and your family, including your mum xx
I am 57 and what I am practicing these days is not to react or respond to other people’s harsh comments or dramatic behaviour. When someone gives a comment directly at me to make me sad, ashamed, angry or guilty I no longer react., instead I try my best to give a smile and be quiet or give the shortest possible answer. I am now tired of trying to prove myself to certain people as I have understood that their aim is to provoke us and gain some happiness. Sometimes they do that because of their mental state. What I now believe is that what others say or do is what they are going to take with them (their karmic account 😊) and I don’t have to be part of it😊
Good thoughts. Someone told me once, respond rather than react. Which I took to mean step back and if you want to come back to it, you can respond calmly rather than react emotionally in the moment. We are entitled to set boundaries and protect our state of mind. Thank you for watching x
Only move for someone with mobility problem, wheelchair or someone with children.
This one. I noticed a cpl years ago. I work in healthcare. People come in grumpy. I just ignore it. Most end up saying sorry because they are hurting, or hungry, or tired, or scared.
@@shamini2811 I’m trying to learn this too. It’s especially difficult when it’s a family member who continually attacks you and is prone to drama.
Stopped taking interest or running after family or friends. It is way too exhausting and a waste of time. No more rushing around. It drives me crazy. Who needs the stress? I need to work on scrolling on my phone. It is a time suck.
Letting go of family children hard one
Stop trying to find life partner
This is a time for us, isn't it? Scrolling is a distraction and so is people pleasing. x
@KerryJames-l6z Yes! Such a waste of time!!
oh yes. A little piece of your heart goes with them.
I agree with all of your points. I gave up the uncomfortable clothes/ shoes/ underwear, I gave up the need to explain why I had to say no to something, and I now don’t worry about FOMO … I have now embraced JOMO(the JOY of missing out)😂!
😀 I love that! Thank you for watching.
LOVE that! JOMO!!! Thank you for posting that!
I’ve stopped wearing uncomfortable clothing several years ago only wear things that are either comfortable or I feel good in. I’m working on stopping from apologizing… Especially when passing somebody on the sidewalk like you mentioned… Which also includes not moving off the sidewalk onto the grass just to make way for somebody else.
It takes practice, doesn’t it?
Given up having an opinion on everything. It is ok not to havean opinion at all. Linda age 77
I agree! Why do we feel we have to form opinions on everything? Really good point. Thanks for watching!
Beautifully said. Pure wisdom....Thank you Linda!
Sooo guilty of being "sorry" ALL the time. I have even been told by friends to quit saying it. However, still 🫢 saying. You have given me reason to be more conscious of quitting.
@@deborahlanyi5535lol.. maybe yry the old fashioned rubber band on wrist and snap it when you say , sorry or any word etc you don't want to say or do🤔
I'll be trying this also 🌸🕊️
Waste of time. Nobody is really interested in others opinions
I’m 63 and have done most of the things you suggested. Great ideas. When people try to give me things most of the time I say no thank you. My older family is always trying to give me things. I downsized 2 years ago and got rid of “stuff”. Most of it I didn’t even buy. I hate shopping. My suggestion is Christmas, we no longer exchange gifts in our family, we just buy gifts for the children. Huge amount of stress gone. Now we can enjoy the holiday without so much stress.
That’s a big stress taken away. We have “secret Santa” in our family where we each have one person to buy for, with a cost limit that everyone can afford.
Ten for ten. I agree with all of them. Giving up social media and watching the news has kept me sane over the past eight years.
I’m glad I’m not alone! Thanks for watching.
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond You're not.
How did you go to this channel 😅
I found your channel this morning and immediately subscribed. I'm also 63 and agree with everything you've said. I'm getting so much better at saying 'no' and I've stopped saying 'sorry' to everyone. I do exercise regularly, but not because of guilt or body issues - I just really enjoy my short runs and long hikes. The big 'quit' which has made me much happier (and I hope healthier) is alcohol. I was only really a social drinker but I've seen how much retired friends are now drinking and just didn't want to go there. I've been alcohol-free for nine months now and love it. 😁
Thank you for subscribing. I found one I hit menopause that I could no longer tolerate much alcohol and it always amazes me how much friends put away! No judgement, just curiosity. 😄
Great that you enjoy exercise x
I am 64 and I recently quit going to bed too late. I am still working and not retiring any time soon. I am now putting myself on a sleep schedule and wake up earlier, and I get so much more done, and feel more energy and clarity. It's a significant change.
I need to do this!
Me too!@@MizDaskarsEcoShop
Oh Brava! This is definitely one for me to crack!
Oh geez still working. Good luck! I can't see me working that long. I'm so tired of it.
I'm 57 and I still stay up way too late. Usually doomscrolling... oops. There are a couple reasons for my late bedtimes, 95% mental, but I really need to work on this.
Same on the clothing....never going back to those uncomfortable choices that we women are supposed to look better in! Good common sense takes, thank-you!
Thank you for watching, and taking the trouble to comment x
I’m glad I’m not alone ❤️
I have just come across your channel. Thank you for this cheerful video 😊.
I didn't think number 8 made you sound arrogant at all. And I am glad that we stop listening to other people's opinions when we get to middle age. This is what a friend calls "the priviledge of ageing", when you gain self-confidence.
As for watching the news and worrying about the plight of people all over the world... I have spent so much of my life doing this, and to no avail whatsoever (even when trying to make the world a better place) that I am now done with both (watching and worrying).
I am in my 50's, and I'm giving up 'romantic' relationships - this is what is making me happier . Friends first.
Thank you for watching! I’ve always thought that the best basis for a romantic relationship is friendship anyway. But the greatest love of all is loving ourselves. X
Hi Jo, a number of your "10" list resonate with me. One thing I am slowly coming to terms with is worrying about things that I cannot change. As my mum used to say, I need to stop crossing bridges before I reach them. 😊
I have “the Serenity Prayer” on my bed side table - are you familiar with it? “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference” I’m not religious, but I like the sentiment. I also practice saying “not my circus, not my monkeys!” Easier said than done at times of course!
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond I do regularly use the circus and monkeys saying :)
❤
The biggest thing I've let go of is allowing other people's bad attitudes get to me. My boundaries are like plexiglass now- transparent and strong at the same time. So freeing- I didn't realize how anxious I was... I also do not judge myself for missing a workout or indulging, because we now trust ourselves to get right back on it. With age comes more reason, patience, and freedom. Oh and btw you had me laughing from beginning to end- I subbed within the first 10 minutes of lmao.
“Reason, patience and freedom” - YES! 🙌🏻 I do amuse myself. While my mouth was running with the cheese grater analogy, my brain was going “stop talking about your knickers!!!”
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond lol!!! hilarious
I have finally found someone who speaks well and is not spouting the same things as other are on you tube. Your content was refreshingly new but very valid in this day and age. Thank you.
Thank you for watching and leaving your thoughts 🪻
I am 61 n retired, totally concur with your list and pretty much have done the same stuff!!!! Financially we are very comfortable, but I dress like a bum n drive my ol’ rusty Chevy truck! Not only do I say no, but f-k no!!!!! 😍
Great! And the nice thing is, you have a choice whether to dress up or down if you want. Thanks for watching and commenting
Great list! I also got rid of ALL social media. Don’t get me wrong: I liked Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok but was spending way too much time scrolling and then wondering why I didn’t have to time to do things I actually enjoyed: reading, journaling, and crafting. Because I’d sit down for 15 minutes, start scrolling, look up and an hour or 2 had passed!
It’s insidious, isn’t it? I’m the same. Thanks for watching and sharing your thoughts! 💐
Love this video Jo, and I’m happy to have found your channel. One thing (other than your 10) that I’ve been doing absolutely forever that I’ve stopped doing, is being responsible for everything. Nobody in my family can be bothered organising things, so they wait for me to. It’s the one I’ve found the toughest to stop because I like things to get done.
That’s a great addition. I know someone who says this a lot - I’ll show her your comment 😉
I totally agree. Saying I'm sorry all the time, worrying about growing older and feeling guilty and beating myself up is what I do on a daily basis. But you are so right I can change these things and you have encouraged me to do so. Thank you for sharing this with me. I am 59 and it's time to stop doing the things that make me miserable. I hope you have a wonderful New Year.😊
Thank you for sharing - and best of luck. Small changes add up! Happy new year! Xxx
I am working on numbers eight and nine, plus a slight variation on these that is to stop imagining what other people might think. This has helped me to pluck up the courage to start my TH-cam channel (3 months ago) and to publish a family memoir (my final draft is out for review with family and friends). I could never have done either of these things when I was younger!
That’s a good one, Chris! Good luck with your channel.
No. 9 & No. 10 has really resonated with me. At 56 I think those are two areas to work on. I started worrying about aging when I turned 55. Got to bounce back coz I plan to be an energetic 80 / 90 year old!
What are your plans for bouncing back? x
Your video really resonated with me, Jo. I find number 9 the hardest and do beat myself up / analyse how the day’s gone, thinking could I have done things better. Absolutely agree on the comfy clothes and shoes too! Thanks for sharing your list. ❤
My pleasure - I’m glad I’m not the only one in the comfy clothes! 😀
What a great list, pretty much all of them resonated. Especially stopping saying Sorry. You've definitely got as much right to that pavement as anyone else :)
@@littlecitygirl I do, right? 😁 we say “sorry” far too much, I think
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond We really do. I'm only 5 ft and when some big bloke shoulders me in the street, it's ridiculous that I'm the one that automatically says sorry! :)
Hi Jo, loving your video!
I'm only 51 and I've already given up watching the news, no television ( apart from The Chase at teatime) and no Facebook ( seeing other people's amazing lives, families, social lives etc made me feel inadequate) Ive also given up feeling guilty about sitting and devouring a whole big bar of Galaxy all to myself 😂
Love it! Whole bar gal here too. Why take a nibble (of life!) when you can have the whole bar! One thing I love about TH-cam is it feels real
What’s a Galaxy bar like? Sounds like it must be really good like a Snickers bar. 🤷♀️
@@sassyfrasti very creamy milk chocolate, but no fillings like a Snickers. I do like me a snickers 😋
@@sassyfrasti Galaxy is the most amazing chocolate. It melts in the mouth and you just can't stop eating it until you realise you've finished the whole large bar all to yourself 🤤
@ Sounds heavenly!
Just found your channel. Your is the first list of this type that I completely agree with. And even better, I appreciate how you present it as what you do for yourself and not as advice to others or as what others *should* do. I’ve been watching similar videos a lot lately and most all of them present as advice. I love your vulnerability and humbleness.
Thank you. I’m so glad that’s how it came across. I’d hate to feel that it seems as if I think I know better. I will use your comment to keep me humble.
Procrastinating, and truly keeping my mouth shut at 60 ❤
@@allapattah5550 keeping your mouth shut - I’m curious. Is that to cause less conflict or because you feel unheard? X
@ self preservation, keeping my business to myself….
Get up early and study my Bible, like I used too
I stopped colouring my hair at 55 and have embraced my silver sparkles 😊
I love that phrase! I have those too 😉 my grandson once called the creases round my eyes “crinkles” which I thought was rather lovely - the perspective of child! 💖
62 and agree with you! I try and get good sleep, best food possible, super cozy clothes, stay away from news n well, people, so no frequently, stopped "just shopping", stopped looking for that right guy, retired and now working on clearing out things I don't need in my house.
There’s a wonderful song by Pink that goes “I can buy myself flowers, write my name in the sand, talk to myself for hours, I can hold my own hand…” do you know it? Your list reminded me of that - self nurturing. Thanks for sharing!
@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond I do know the song. I started this journey to find ME long ago with Marianne Williamson then it just snow balled. I do watch Mel Robbins frequently and listen to very calming music. As my 3 children grew up n moved on I had to too lol. Had my forst at 19 so had zero clue who I was. I know now lol.
Miley Cyrus
@@lynnehorizon5532 oh is it? lol - of course! How did I forget that? Thanks
@@journeytohealthafter60 brilliant. It's all a journey, isn't it?
Brilliant advice, thanks 🙏I have given up alcohol and toxic friendships. Scrolling on the phone and the news is a good one too. ❤️🙏 Thanks for making this video. You are amazing for your age, very vibrant. I have quit looking for love which has made me happier and embraced being single. I have learnt love is within me.
“Love is within me” 🔥that’s the greatest love of all!
I've stopped engaging in conversations, usually over the phone with certain family members who want to rehash the past, how they were wronged in some way or even trying to get me to re live past situations. I simply say it was bad enough the first time, why put myself through negative emotions again, I don't have time for it. Move on, learn from it and put past hurts behind.
For a long time I was one of those people who struggled to move on from past hurts. I finally feel free after letting go. Our brains don’t know the difference between what’s real and what is imagined when it comes to the rush of stress hormones we experience, so I can imagine the relief you must have felt on drawing that boundary 💐
I left my husband after 28 years. The BEST decision of my life.
Wow - that must have been hard at the time. So glad it’s worked out well for you 💐
Me too! He was such a narcissist and it was the best decision I ever made. I'm not scared of growing old on my own. I'm quite enjoying the solitude!
same here! Left him after 15 years (10 years ago), and started living. In the last 10 years, I've done all the things mentioned in the video too, love my life!
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond leaving is the easy part. The tough part is all the years trying to make it work, protecting the kids, and finally, finding the courage to give up and walk out.
@@kifi672 🫂
"I was always supposed to be somewhere else"...😂😂
#2 ressonate in me, big time.
Exhausting, isn't it?
At 56, I just had this moment of “I’m not what I planned to be,” and I was troubled about disappointing myself, not being a professional screen writer. I realized that the push and shove and fight of the business is not how I want to live my life. However, as I plan for retirement after 30 years as an English professor, I’m looking for what would engage me, not feel stressful, feel meaningful and fun., be creative but not way out of my abilities, contribute but not depress me. I’m still thinking and have four more years to ponder and discover.
@@13csoki Keep dreaming - good luck!
I’m working from home for a time, and I LOVE my hoodie sweatshirts, spending time with my husband, yoga pants, boundaries with people, four cups of coffee in the morning, reading books, my gardening/ grounding time, my lovely career and sunshine 🥴
Beautiful! x
Can relate to all 10. I don't suffer fools gladly. No 9 I've only just started doing and no 10 I'm working on. I've also given up drinking alcohol on a regular basis, high days and holidays for me and feel so much better for it .
I found I could no longer tolerate alcohol during perimenopause - not uncommon, apparently. So even on high days and holidays it's only one drink for me! I know a lot of women who say they feel better for stopping altogether. Not always easy, eh? Thanks for taking the time to comment.
@@roslinney4285 yup 👍 to the "given up alcohol".
March this year I said goodbye and thanks for the parties through my life, but now I want to walk another path...(and get my sunday mornings back) 🙏💖
This is brilliant! I’m sitting here agreeing with everything you say. Subscribed! Thank you!
Thank YOU for watching and subscribing! Happy New Year 💐
I'm grateful for this. My mom and mom-in-law are passed on. I often wish I had a more mature perspective to reference. Thank you for putting this out there so I have a reference point. Some of those I've already done. Some I hope to do. I'm glad that the physical discomfort of the fifties passes. That is good news!
Hi 👋🏻 there are other physical challenges, of course, but not you’re as confusing as the menopause years! Happy to be your TH-cam Mum 😉
Thank you so much. Really appreciate the fact that you chose to air your thoughts explicitly. I too am heading towards my 60th birthday. So this really makes a lot of sense to me. I too have things which I need to be assertive of, to be able to say NO and also not to feel guilty for things I said or did which were well intentioned. Thank you so much once again. I wish you all the very best in life 💖
Thank you for watching, and for sharing your thoughts - and for the well wishes! Much appreciated x
I’m 62 years old, but I still acting like young adult, and don’t‘t give up things, love to shopping, ware new clothing every week, back to school study medical terminology, and hanging around with younger friends, the result is that I feel young and look young. Please don’t give up !
Love it 😍
Its not giving up.Its keeping up with the jones.
No giving up here - it’s quitting unhelpful behaviours and things to make room for the things that serve me and make me happy 💐
If those are the things that make you happy, of course you should keep them 🎉😊
Lovely post! I am 61 and gone through the same list. Stopped trying to be the pleaser, fixer, carer etc. To lose lifelong self conciousness I've started my youtube channel too which is boosting my new found "me", unfettered by worrying what others think. I'm doing the decluttering thing too..feels great! That includes cancelling our tv licence so I just watch things I'm interested in on youtube, which has been liberating. Well done you.
Ah thank you! I shall check out your channel. Good luck and have fun with it!
lol- your #1 makes me smile because at 55, I stopped buying uncomfortable clothes. I just turned 56, and only want cotton and linen. No matter how cute or pretty a piece of clothing is, if it’s not natural fabric, I will not get it. Thank you
tech gremlins posted your comment twice. Worth repeating though! x
I'm 58 and I quit Facebook and watching the news and I feel so much better.
Brilliant
TS 3:37 Kelly Ripa in her book " Live Wire" has discovered in her 40s the phrase : "No That does not work for me." She encourages us to use it. ;-)
I LOVE that! That DOES work for me! Thank you for sharing x
I like that phrase also it's a little hard for me to just give a direct..No.😆
Hi Jo, I just found your channel and it was such a nice surprise! Your list is precious and I fully agree with it. I'm 57 and it's such a relief to get rid of such useless things or mindsets!! Thank you ❤
Yes - a sense of relief! Thank you for sharing your thoughts. X
Hi! I love your list of 10 things you quit. I stopped being friends with people that were so negative and just complain. I’m a happy person and I wanted to stop being around these sort of people. I’ve never done Facebook because I felt it was a waste of time. I don’t do Netflix because I don’t want to get hooked on a show and then binge watch if I missed an episode. I quit listening to people. After two divorces, I quit looking for a man. I’m happy doing things by myself or with friends. I like coming home and enjoying my peace and quiet.
It sounds as though you’ve found what works for you. The peace and quiet sounds like bliss! Thanks for sharing your perspective.
Even 18 months + into retirement I find myself needing to remember it’s ok to slow down - in a hurry is a default setting more than 30 years in a high stress job, raising two kids and being the primary caregiver for aging parents who’s have both now passed meant I was constantly behind, always needing to do more - it’s so strange not rushing all the time - I’m still figuring it out
I think the nervous system takes its time to catch up! Once it does, you feel as though you can breathe so much more deeply. Thank you for watching and sharing 💐
You are so right about the news. 9/11 was also the first time I was glued to the news stations- I was actually just talking about this the other day. I never have the news on these days. I will check the news from time to time by going to the website to read but that’s it. I actually avoid people who are obsessed with the news now. I’ve given up explaining my choices. I use to give an explanation for everything- if i declined an invitation, I would say why. If someone gave me a compliment on my outfit- I would go in to detail of where I bought it and the sale price ect. I just don’t do that anymore. New subscriber here ❤
Thank you for subscribing. Are you happier for not watching?
Excellent, valuable points to grow and enjoy your life. Thanks!
Thank YOU for watching! 🙏
In my 60s I quit shopping 🛍️ for clothes, I now make my own. (I haven’t sewn since high-school!) A terrific brain-busting mental exercise regimen. I get to pick fabrics in color I love, make comfortable styles ❤❤❤ The other thing I’m working on is when I make a positive observation I don’t add (… for your age). (example) I just say “Sheila looks great in that dress”!!! Age doesn’t matter. ❤❤❤
The “for your age” thing is a bit of a bugbear of mine - such a backhanded compliment! I love that you’ve combined quitting something with a new hobby and a positive outcome. Thanks for sharing.
I’m 60 and I’ve really been worried about growing older. I have the same thoughts that you described. It was an eye opener for me when you said: “ why waste time worrying- life is too short.” Thank you for posting. I subscribed.
Life is for living! 😉Thank you for subscribing 💐
I am practicing giving things up 😅
I'm trying not to beat myself up as much.
I agree about uncomfortable clothes and footwear.
I think Jo you have nailed a lot of what I'm trying to do.
I have just quit a recent job after a week as I realised it was not for me and this was a massive thing for me to do. The relief was immense, much happier and also know something new about myself too.
@@Cheryl68-q8q that was brave - kudos to you! We know ourselves better now, don’t we? I hope you find something that is perfect for you soon!
Yes! I gave up on fussy clothing in my 40's. Love to be comfy! #9...Amen! Good advice. And you have a great voice for this. So bouncy and joyful! Lovely! I'm also learning to give up looking to other people for validation and look instead to God for my worth and value. Psalm 139:14 "I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made."
Thank you for watching and sharing your perspective 🌸
Brava ! Well done & cheers from across the pond in Buffalo, New York ( right near Canada, & Niagara Falls). Ahhh … you are a delight. I’m 64 & I fully agree. My dear late Mom - & my Nana - were British born & raised so I also love your accent ! Jolly good ! I grew up with it. 1st time viewer here & new subscriber. Thank you for this. Love , Liz
Thank you for subscribing! What part of the UK did your mum come from?
Love this! Hello from Southwest Michigan, USA! Great food for thought. Agree with all of it. Most I do now at 62, and I think started up come naturally with age, and yes, wisdom! Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed it a lot! And Happy New Year to you!
Thank you for watching! Happy New Year to you too 🤩
Howdy, some great points, I'm 60 and feel time is running out, it's something That has hit me at 60.
Worrying, I'm getting ride of stuff on one hand but have got some on the other, I say no as well now, I do think more about what I want. Selfish maybe? I'm on my own now due to tragic circumstances,
Love the vlog will tune in again.
David 😊
I think we’ve earned the right to be for self-ish, don’t you? 🤩 As for time running out, you might enjoy my video “The New “Old” - a different perspective. Thanks for watching. 👀
Thank you for sharing. A slow- paced, meaningful existence is what one deserves after 50. We evolve beautifully and grow wiser.
Love that! I craved a slower pace through my 50s. It took me a decade to find it!
I gave up wearing uncomfortable shoes years ago. I may have been in my 40s. I also ditched uncomfortable underwear. That soon extended to all clothing. If it itches, pinches or rubs, I won't wear it. If I don't like how it feels, I don't buy it. I'm struggling with not buying stuff. I have well and truly reached the stage of getting rid of stuff, but I was recluttering faster than I was decluttering. I'm doing a no-spend month this month, and I've been so surprised by how many times I've had the impulse to purchase things. There's a bunch of stuff in my Amazon cart as we speak.
I think we’ve reached a point of consumption saturation, but it’s like an addiction- we’re conditioned to want more! At least you’re wearing comfortable clothes 😅
I just loved your thoughts and advice. I'm Turing 59 this year and it was just what i needed to hear. Thank you for saying the brain fog began to clear in your 60s. That had really been a worry point in my 50s. I'm looking forward to more of your advice and good thoughts.
@@lisawool5855 the brain fog is scary, isn’t it? I wouldn’t say I’m 100% clear headed, but at 63 I’m definitely less foggy than 5 years ago. thank you for watching - I’ll look out for you xx
Just found you and subscribed. Everything on your list resonates. Thank you for this content Jo. I'm looking forward to more.
Thank you! I'm glad it hit home ;-)
Fantastic! All of these things I gave up this year! Thank you!
The realisation demands action!
Lovely to watch your videos and just like you talk with me! I like your way of laughing. Great idea to quit the things you don't need or don't like anymore! I am not ready to stop say sorry and start to say no. Since Covid 19 I quit eating our with friends; I quit window shopping; I quit watching TV (but TH-cam which I found you!); I quit wearing skirt/dress everyday (I wear black pants and black top which make me simple and elegant); I quit collecting things; I quit buying Xmas card; I quit burying luxury stuff; I quit chasing thins.Again thank for sharing good stuff. xoxo
Thank you for your comments. I love your channel - so joyful and full of energy! I have subscribed.
I have just come across your video, it spoke volumes 💪🏽I will 61years in the next 2 months the best biggest present I have given myself is letting my workmates know that, I am just a colleague and not more than that! I have given away most of my shoes that made uncomfortable, and those I haven’t used in the last 2 years plus the clothes. I feel free and more happy. Wishing you all the best in your next adventure. Xx
Thank you! Free and more happy - wonderful!
I'm sorry it took you to 61 to not fraternise with your work colleagues. I'm a huge introvert and when I was in my early 30s I was working in a giant medical research lab. There were 400 researchers under one roof and it was always a huge relief to go home and be alone with my pets and husband. A colleague was having a milestone birthday party and she kept hassling people to confirm they were coming. She giddily said to me: Are you coming to my party? My reply: I don't socialise. 🤣
Great list that I could agree with easily. The way I look at aging now is that it is to be celebrated, a lot of people don’t get this far! Ps currently clearing my wardrobe of clothes that don’t make me feel good. 😊
YES! Clear out that wardrobe, clean that social media feed of negative stuff and look for the good in the world! x
@@sarahclayton3330 few weeks ago I heard Jane Fonda saying something like:" Anyone can be young - only the lucky gets to be old" and I just love that 💖
Thanks to pandemic “lockdown” my feet became comfortable and healthy. When we began work again, I gave up on professional scrunching shoes. I wear nice sneakers with my suits.
🙌🏻 good for you! The last time I wore a heel I was in boots. Slipped in a polished floor and my foot went one way and my ankle the other - ouch! Never again!
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond ow ow ow ow
I quit a lot of the things that you listed in my mid and late forties. And you are correct... At 5 2 life is much calmer, more peaceful, and joyful🎉
Wonderful! Life feels so much easier, doesn’t it? Thanks for watching (love your TH-cam handle!)
You are very pleasant. Enjoyed watching your video. Thank you.
Like many here, I am stopping colouring my hair, going out more with people who matter and stopped expecting validation from others. Getting rid of stuff.
I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
This was brilliant, I can add I gave up wearing a bra, despite people’s opinions. They’re welcome to their own opinions, but I’ll stick to feeling more comfortable lol. Also, I’m trying with number 10 :), and doom scrolling. Deleting my news apps! Thanks for this :)
I'd do the same, but I'm worried I might knock myself out if I jump up suddenly! 🙃Seriously, I do wear unwired regularly. I think it's much healthier. THanks for watching! x
Oh, me too! I do put on a bra if I want to feel respectable. If I go out to dinner, or to see a professional. But not one of those underwire jobs. No. Never again!
Yes! A day when I don’t need to wear a bra is a very happy one 😂😂
@@Barneysma 😅
Me too! I’m 58, stopped wearing a bra about 10 years ago. I wear soft tank tops. I love when I go to the doctor or somewhere and they say remove this article of clothing, but you can keep your bra on, I proudly say, “I don’t wear a bra” and smile!
Just found you as you popped up on my feed. I'm 62 and love your points. No more tight jeans for me, no more people pleasing, reduced advert watching, seriously reduced mainstream TV. Given up the swimming pool for wild swimming with fins on. Still working on giving up caring what people think but I'm getting there. No noisy cafes with people coughing right next to you, i get up and move somewhere else. Oh what freedom comes with midlife onwards!
I love this! And wild swimming - I love the idea, but I’m far too soft! I wonder if you might enjoy this conversation I had with Melina Abbott who is also a convert? th-cam.com/video/C3vqxmELBSA/w-d-xo.htmlsi=COhTfHuLz13CyE9a
@@JoBlackwell-MidlifeAndBeyond cheers, I'll have a look!
No is a one word full sentense!
Love that ❤
Just stumbled upon your channel. Love it. So agree. Since I retired, my motto has become, "I'm as busy as I want to be." I stay active but I choose where I will expend my energy. 🙂
I love that - choosing where you expend your energy. Yes!🙌🏻