Coping with Stalkers: Psychopaths, Narcissists, Paranoids, Erotomanics
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 มี.ค. 2013
- Everything You Need to Know about Narcissists, Psychopaths, and Abuse - click on this link: www.narcissistic-abuse.com/faq...
Stalkers are not made of one cloth. Some of them are psychopaths, others are schizoids, narcissists, paranoids, or an admixture of these mental health disorders. Stalkers harass their victims because they are lonely, or because it is fun (these are latent sadists), or because they can't help it (clinging or co-dependent behaviour), or for a myriad different reasons.
Clearly, coping techniques suited to one type of stalker may backfire or prove to be futile with another. The only denominator common to all bullying stalkers is their pent-up rage. The stalker is angry at his or her targets and hates them. He perceives his victims as unnecessarily and churlishly frustrating. The aim of stalking is to "educate" the victim and to punish her.
Hence the catch-22 of coping with stalkers:
The standard -- and good -- advice is to avoid all contact with your stalker, to ignore him, even as you take precautions. But being evaded only inflames the stalker's wrath and enhances his frustration. The more he feels sidelined and stonewalled, the more persistent he becomes, the more intrusive and the more aggressive.
It is essential, therefore, to first identify the type of abuser you are faced with.
(From the book "Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited" by Sam Vaknin - Click on this link to purchase the print book, or 16 e-books, or 3 DVDs with 16 hours of video lectures on narcissists, psychopaths, and abuse in relationships: www.narcissistic-abuse.com/the...)
![เก่งแต่ลับหลัง (FINSTA) - ส้ม มารี (Zom Marie) Ft. Punch 4EVE [Official MV]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/OOolBU2aC70/mqdefault.jpg)
Stalkers have entitlement issues. A skilled stalker will manipulate other people to stalk you.
+iluvmyswissball Yes, this is exactly what happened to me. He had a whole army of people insulting me, shunning me, exorting me to have sex with him (because, they said, he would throw me away and leave me alone afterwards). This harassment continued for years!!!!
There are too many naive and gullible people, who love a good gossip, out there. No judgment at all.
If those idiots believe anything this fool tells them, they are stupid as I thought they were. People are far to weak and feeble mind to stand on their own freewill. Who thinks for themselves?
Crazy crazy yet 🎯🎯🎯
There disgusting
@Mr. Hellas there pathetic they need victims to make money they Target lonely people there easy prey and pay for them but karma will deal with them
Getting away may mean leaving everything and everyone you know behind. Stalkers are dangerous.
Potential killers and rapists
Pra ter paz e sobreviver né
Yes and not knowing what they want or why they won't stop is just scary
I've always considered restraining orders to be nothing but a formality. They only work for law-abiding people, which stalkers seem to have little to no regard for.
Restraining Orders and Peace Bonds samvak.tripod.com/abuse21b.html Getting Law Enforcement Authorities and the Police Involved samvak.tripod.com/abuse21a.html
+Avonlea Montague It also points out your exact location to the stalker which wasn't worth it for me. No real stalker is interested in paper.
+Avonlea Montague I agree. And, some law enforcement personnel are stalkers, psychopaths, narcissist and paranoids too. They have a domestic violence rate four times the national average, which is about twice that of the NFL, so we need to be cautious.
Jaconda Wagner Very interesting statistic! True. I imagine the stress, while it doesn't excuse it, may explain some of that.
+Avonlea Montague Narcissists are over-represented in law enforcement and the judiciary: www.narcissistic-abuse.com/journal70.html
what's even crazier is when these people stalk you online. then in real time! No thanks
Sei nem mais o que é pior
I agree. Stalkers are crazy.
I was stalked for from 2008-2015,they sabotaged my relationships they made up stories and told people to stay away from me.,hacked into my computer,put spy ware on my cell phone,got my fired from 2 jobs,got me kicked out of school,bankrupted me.
They seem to get everyone around you to go along with their games and harassed you they followed me from California and chased me all the way to Texas and the harassment continued,they try to communicate with you through other people saying thing like "Were not going to let you start a new life" and other terrifying comments like "If you keep talking Sh..t about people were going to come get you and f,,k your shit up>
They get people to pose as romantic interests and come on to you at work and tried to turn it around saying that i was the one who come on to them and tried to get me fired at 4 of my jobs in a row.I went through 7 jobs trying to evade them but they seem to track me down and start the harassment over again. they followed me back to California and they found me and started the harassment again, The books are rite "they will never stop:.
The Police thought that I was the crazy one and that I am just being paranoid and should see a shrink and offered no help at all.
You cannot run, you cannot hide,they will track you down pretending that they are so worried about you and all of the things you are going through and just want help, that is they want to find you and continue doing what they have been doing "Terrorize and harass you " sabotage your relationships,your jobs ect.. what ever they can do to keep you terrorized..
Still being stalked
Im currently working with the Los Angeles district attorney. im still living in my car but I have 2 jobs and saving money to I can hire (The Dude) expert stalker hunter he wants 20k and he wants to use me as bait to hes going to get him for sure
+Mark Ferris I'm having a similar experience. I have pictures, videos and a paper trail that I'm slowly releasing. Even with that the police do not believe its stalking, although no one has offered an alternative explanation. I wish you the best. Consider starting a GoFundMe campaign to save the money for your expert. I'd be interested in talking to your expert as well.
Dealing with the same
Mark Ferris same things has been happening to me.
Is there an Expert Stalker hunter out there please send me a Message. I am going through a similar situation dealing with Mentally Ill Obsessed creepers Organized Crime in Romania in a country with No Law. If you have information about a Good Attorney or Expert Stalker Hunter please write to me at. andreaDdd1995@gmail.com Thank You!
It's crazy that people in their 60's can bully others. Personally, I don't have the time or inclination.
Age in some cases doesn't deter stalking behavior. They suffer from personality disorders and act on impulse. So it makes me wonder if people are safe to be around them. I have a neighbor who is in close 80, and he has stalked me for nearly three years. Mind you, this man is 5 decades older than me. I think as stalkers get older they become more viscious and cruel.
Foreal
Mine started at 57, four years ago and he’s still at it
@@TheTeganOsmondChannel It almost seems demonic doesn't it?
@@odieyama7 absolutely. I'm so glad you responded. I'm a believer so I do believe its demonic too. I also do a couple videos on my channel about this phenomenon.
Wow! Excellent educational video on the psychology of stalkers. My stalker even said some of these things out loud. I know this because, unfortunately, his flying monkeys are uninformed, easily manipulated people who have bought his self-justifications, which led them to repeat his statements to me in order to put pressure on me.
For instance:
At 1:07: "I am going to teach her something/she needs to be thought a lesson." He is actually revealing his mindset with these statements.
At 1:23: if you cut contact and block the person, their behavior gets worst. Yes! In my case, it has mostly been an increasingly vicious backstabbing, which eventually led to threats of violence from him, and actual violence and more harassment from other disturbed people, who believed his bullshit, or just thought it would be fun to join in. Stalking is indeed bullying, and slander is one of the favorite tools of the bully. I suspect that the "disordered character" (whatever his/her diagnose would be) gets narcissist supply from getting people to believe their every word, especially when those gullible people go on to spread their malicious gossip even further. I can see how such a bully (who is a sadist) would be getting a feeling of power and control from getting flying monkeys to do their dirty work for them.
At 2:03: he believes in coded messages. Yes! He finds meaning where there is none, or somehow finds a twisted logic to convince himself (and/or others) that a behavior means the opposite of what it really means. For instance, in one instance of stalking (in a store), he tried to get his audience (people in the store) to support him by claiming that when women ignore him, refuse to talk to him, and walk away (as I was doing), it means that he is hot and they want him... A store employee, who was supportive of me, got him to say why he thinks that. He said: "Because I am hot, and they all do that (all women do that to me)." What a nutcase!
You are very good at explaining these things, Sam Vaknin! Much of the information we find elsewhere is so general, we might not even recognize stalking when it happens, for instance when it comes mostly in the form of defamation and slander. People think that stalking is just when you are being followed and visited by a creep at home. I only realized it was stalking when the backbiting escalated to the level of threats. By that time, he had already ruined my reputation and manipulated my relationship with common acquaintances to such an extent that it's probably not fixable.
It's also difficult to make a log after the fact, because you might not realize the size of the problem. My stalker is/was being sneaky. At first, you might think it's a small conflict and misunderstanding that is going to blow over. If you were dealing with a reasonable person, it would blow over, and you would never hear about it again. When the shit finally hits the fan, like when you realize your reputation is ruined and who is responsible for it, you have to try to remember when this happened, and this, and this (in order to get police assistance). It's actually hard to do.
The fact that some commonly known coping tactics (like ignoring the person, cutting all contact, blocking) might not work with a certain type of stalker is also well-kept information. We always hear: just ignore the bully, he/she will get tired of it and move on. Not so!
Thank you for your in-depth explanations, and the high-quality, well-structured information you provide.
+Canadian97467 Ditto.
They are crazy Cowards and patethic. My friend goes through this crap from 6 years with a stalker satanist who now
Yep it’s been said so many times that you can even hear it it in your sleep, “ignore them and they’ll stop”, bs some won’t stop till they stop breathing.
@@donnelhuddleston2478 Truth!!
You're correct about everything here!!
like Sam said people can be lonely or bored and turn a person's world upside-down by stalking them. It really seems more like a "systemic issue of abuse" that sadly, still gets its start in most families today. Parents keep abusing their children than sending them to therapy and abusers keep telling their victims to get treatment for depression ... when will we ever learn humans were not meant to be abused at all?
Excelent video! You can bet that a gang of criminal stalkers will use deception, abuse of trust, manipulation of children, and finally the lethal solution. Congratulations for your outstanding work.
You are a legend, I remember you from the Egomania documentary.
Someone I thought was a friend has started stalking me recently...so I must thank you for this advice. The manipulative stalker is the one I’m dealing with.
I'm being stalked by creepy neighbors and unfortunately the situation is on going smh
Same! Are you still there? It is a nightmare! I don't even know them, never have. I think the guy is a psychopath. Police are no help. When i told the police & had 1 recording & 2 pics of property damage they wouldn't even look at it. They questioned the psycho who lied & said it is me bothering them. Get security cameras for getting evidence. I read to get a go pro camera & wear it at all times when you are outside to get evidence.
@@starlight8302 That's sad that you would have to have a go-pro camera attached to you to prove you are not the aggressor. Satan is busy.
@@PrettyToez07 Yes it is. That is what happens when you live next door to a psychopath. Crazier thing is i don't even know that demon, never did.
Creepy stalker neighbors are the worst
Sounds like perverts
If I do not know this person, why would he single me out? He has had a gang of women on a social media app, so why is he harassing a married woman of thirty years? He has to be hooked on some form of narcotics, cocaine or some type of drugs. This three year nightmare must end now!
Probably I bet they're drug addicts. Stalkers are criminals
I kinda had this thing with a narcissist till he blocked me completely out of his life all of a sudden. last week he thought he could pick up where he left, but I told him NO WAY
Sounds like a a guy friend of mine in the UK. I've been knowing him for about 15 years and he only contacts me during my birthday month but he won't communicate with me any other time of the year. Just weird. He won't answer any questions I have of him. I cut him off by not responding to him at all, but every year he continues to contact me as if it's no biggie. Weirdo.
I have a delusional paranoid schizophrenic stalker stranger that started stalking and terrorizing my children and I through an assault at my work. Unfortunately he has friends, family, church(it’s not a normal church a cult like one) members surrounding him that not only didn’t get this man proper help they took part in the staking and terrorizing us. My kids and I moved alway. Even though they are far away now, 8yrs of their stalking and terrorizing us was so hard to go through. We take many personal safety steps, have a hard time trusting others, have alarm in our home, security cameras we each keep a knife and pepper spray on us& a secret handcuff key,we bought a crossbow, my son and I had to applied for a firearms license and we have to get a firearm.
I’m just a regular person. My kids too.
This can happen to us it can happen to anyone. There needs to be better stalking laws globally! Majority of stalker don’t obey restraining orders. They don’t care about them. Most need intense therapy. That they won’t go willingly to. Courts need to order it.
Sounds like scientology or JW
Yes. It is called "comorbidity". In fact, it is quite common.
When your stalker is an IT graduate. Rip your security
When your stalker is a former police officer, RIP privacy & protection.
I had a stalker tell me straight up that he had been camping out in the tree in my backyard. He had been stalking me and watching me all during the night then would leave in the day time. Then the same person would just pop up and would be sitting on my porch when I got home, so he knew where I was and knew that I would be on my way home. He actually thought there was nothing wrong with doing these things. He told me I was crazy for flying off on him. It just makes no sense how stalkers think its OK to do the things that do. Smh
creepo's straight up keep away.
What kind of stalker is not responding of any law inforcement action but keep pushing boundaries even further?
The common kind samvak.tripod.com/abuse18.html
I wish my stalker could move on & "LEAVE ME ALONE" I DON'T LOVE HIM!
Your stalker doesn’t love you either! That’s not love, that’s sickness. Cut off all contacts, do not ever respond, avoid at all costs and ignore ignore ignore! The stalker knows you don’t love him/her. He/she wants a reaction out of you, to make you miserable because you don’t want to be with them. Give them nothing!!
Meanwhile my stalkers are killer rapist abuser
Narcissists don't make such distinctions (lies, truth.) Thank you for your kind words. I suggest that you buy the book from Barnes and Noble (online or in a store near you). Copies sold via Amazon are second-hand and MUCH MORE expensive! Or go to my website and purchase the e-book edition!
It just dealt with this last night and took your advice immediately. Continued thanks for the work you do to explain these things to us and give us sound advice.
Excellent youtube! Like always Sam,... your information educates us and opens our eyes. I like your famous No Contact rule. It keeps victims safe. It eliminates the unnecessary drama in ones life. No Contact gives the victim an opportunity to heal, recover and focus on themselves.
I would like to see a future video that talks about dating in the future. Moving on. What to look out for when choosing new friends, jobs, partners. .. etc., etc.
And how to recognize/evaluate oneself the feeling of wellness and ones progress recovery. Because victims need to invest in healthy future relationships.
stalkers go after there victims because they can't get there good looks out of there minds! each second of each day for years, then when there is a nice reaction from the victim the stalkers thinks he she is in love with them bingo!!the stalker tries to get them for themselves.
So true
I friended a narc woman who lives miles away from me on the westcoast. I honestly believe if I lived nearby she would seriously stalk me. I often believed she used my GPS on my phone while talking to her to track my movements. (I'm a truck driver) If y'all can see the countless phones calls I get when I ignore her. I ignored close to 500 calls from her since June15.
Thank you so much for this video Dr. Vaknin.
oh dear god, im trying so hard to stay positive about stalkers. now I just wanna cry. I don't wanna live in fear😭
Wandering Star how are you?
🤗
@@ericarice4588 thank u for asking i appreciate it. Apologies for late response. Im much better now how r u?
@@mybeautifuljourney7540 thank u
Same I’m getting scared I have a potential stalker in the rise I have gone no contact with the guy but I’m noticing some small things I’m starting to fear for my life I’m really scared ugh
Thank you for your kind words. I suggest that you buy the book from Barnes and Noble (online or in a store near you). Copies sold via Amazon are second-hand and MUCH MORE expensive! Or go to my website and purchase the e-book edition!
Hi Sam. You mentioned in this video that neutrally telling the narcissistic stalker about boundaries would be helpful because they do not attach and therefore will not react much and move on. How does this compare with the experience of narcissistic injury? The reaction of the erotomaniac stalker seems more akin to the narcissism you've described in many of your other videos, although I do understand that you also make reference to different iterations of narcissists.
This 29 year old online won't leave me alone because I blocked him. I'm 15 and he kept saying he loves me and that I'm beautiful so I took my profile pic down. He keeps making more accounts
What do you call a stalker who believes they are entitled to the things that they have always wanted but could not get, the things you have worked hard to achieve and earn and they feel that you stole what was theirs, simply by working for and earning that thing which they wanted handed to them on a silver platter? A stalker who you never dated and who doesn't love you, is friends with all your friends, and who wants your life?
Sounds like borderline
I have a stalker who contacts my friends but not me directly. It's been going on for longer than a year. What should I do?
Does your stalker just inquire about you or are they slandering you or both. Just warn your friends, family and co-workers about the nut job stalking you and they should just ignore him or her and take everything he/she says with a grain of salt.
iluvmyswissball Both
+Doomsy I have had experience with that. In my experience, it's a guy I rejected and endeavoured to keep bothering me through acquaintances in order to ruin my reputation, bring me down to his level. He imagined that I would be together with him one day if he made my life sour enough.
I had many conversations with many of his flying monkeys for X years, and it was hard to do because nobody believed me. For years, they were taking his side. It was so aggravating. It finally sunk in, though, but only after I went to the police to make it stop.
Build a case, write down everything with dates, including the conversation with the flying monkeys. You know that there is defamation going on because random people eventually reveal it to you. Record these conversations with your phone if you can, because the nutjob might deny everything, and try to put it on you.
Be patient with people, because they don't know who is telling the truth, right? It's not their fault. Being naive is not a crime, it just makes you an apt flying monkey. Eventually, after repeating myself so many times, people finally got the picture.
+Doomsy Oh, yeah! And cut all contact with the stalker, if you can (e.g. if there is no shared custody). Any access to you is an opportunity to manipulate you. But as Sam Vaknin explained, with some type of stalkers, if it's early on in the process, putting them firmly in their place might work (e.g. with a stereotypical narcissist as per Vakin's profiling above).
Since you wrote this a year ago, and the stalker had already gone on for more than a year, it's not early on in the process, and there is no reason to engage with that person at all. If you are doing it, you are putting oil on the fire.
Thank you for this. My downstairs neighbor seems to be stalking me and it is incredibly disorienting. This helps me better understand why he is doing this. I think he felt we were making too much noise at first but then I started to notice him staying home significantly more, hovering around the area of the apartment we were in, beginning to follow our schedule (even when ours changes), and running into me in the very brief time I am outside. The irony is that the less and less he can hear us the more indignant and angry he gets.
Clearly he likes being indignant/outraged by us to the point that he seems to have devoted his life to hanging around to see if there's anything to be angry at. He comes beneath where I am and drops incredibly loud objects and sometimes will literally follow me back and forth through the apartment. I have refused to respond or interact with him which only seems to make him angrier. I am a hermit which makes me a much easier target but what has helped is leaving and coming back at different times and as much white noise as I can get going. I used to follow a fairly predictable pattern but now I try to always change it up. Of course I am afraid it will still escalate.
How to Cope with Stalkers and Paranoids
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse21b.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse21a.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse18.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse15.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse16.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily14.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily16.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily17.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily18.html
Oh my stars! Until one has experienced "crazy" or the sadistic "crazy maker", stories like this seem hard to believe, but oh no! All too recognizable!
I am going through something similar as you are...downstairs neighbor is a female and she seems to be obsessed with me! I probably have said ten words to her over the years as neighbors. she did drugs don't know if she still does or not because I try not to look at her or have any involvement with her whatsoever! I do know that she shows signs of being bipolar which is a bit scary because she follows me around in my house like a sick puppy but if she seesme outside she takes off running like a frightened dog. I can hear her walking into wherever room I go into or she constantly moves her car from the driveway in the back to the front of the house which is in front of my house. Convinced that she has tapped into my cell and wireless devices but until I have physical proof it is useless to call the authorities. If you have strong intuition like I do...you know exactly what is happening. Very sad that good people are victims of the evilness in this world. But good people are also protected by the Creator and his assigned Angels encamped around you.
I'm a woman with an upstairs neighbor currently doing something similar. He is much younger than me. We were friendly/neighborly in the past, and I was friends with his mom, too. They both used to live there until recently. He quickly became jealous of my friendship with his mom (she is older than I am, and she called me "daughter"). Between his jealousy, lies, and manipulation, I started putting the puzzle pieces together that he might be a Covert Narcissist. Either way, I didn't want to interfere in their relationship or be involved in anything toxic myself. So I cut ties and went No Contact.
Soon after, he started "showing up" when I just happened to be outside. As an online grad student (Forensic Psychology), I only go out a little because I'm so busy. So it's no coincidence that he just happened to show up at the apartment complex's mailboxes at the same time I did, especially when it was not close to the time of mail delivery. That was the first time I caught him, but it's happened multiple times since then in other ways.
He also seems to follow me around my apartment sometimes, and it feels like he is listening to hear what I'm doing. He also intentionally makes loud, sudden noises at odd times. His favorite is slamming the toilet seat or lid. I swear, I don't know how he has not broken it! What's intentionally hurtful about the noise issue is that I have diagnosed CPTSD from childhood from dealing with a Covert Narcissistic mother. I've done the therapy, and I have coping techniques. It is under control for the most part. However, he lied and "mirrored" that he also had PTSD from childhood and asked me for help to deal with it. Now, it feels like he's intentionally triggering it because he's angry and wants to throw a tantrum, or he's trying to incite a reactive abuse response so he can play the victim.
Helping him with his PTSD was how our friendship even started. We always spoke outside, and he was never in my home. I was in his and his mom's apartment a few times for supper and her birthday (which he made all about himself), but that's it. I genuinely tried to help the guy, and his mom appreciated that. Now, his jealousy has pushed me away and her away. She is staying in a nursing facility, and I think she has finally had enough. Her health was poor, to begin with, and she had expressed concerns to me privately about his being like his father. I took that to mean controlling or something.
So now, I'm stuck trying to graduate in a month (which should be a happy time) in a downstairs apartment where he can hear me every time I leave, and he may/may not follow me. I use precautions when I go, and I am always careful (phone, pepper spray, situational awareness of my surroundings). I have also reported his behavior multiple times to the apartment management. They acted like they were concerned and wanted to help me at first. Now, it's nothing. No response. My best guess is that he's played the victim with them, too, and he's got them fooled that he doesn't know what I'm talking about.
I hate that others are going through this, too, but I do feel some reassurance that I am not losing my mind. And it adds another dynamic when the stalker lives above or below you, that's for sure! I did see that the good professor posted several additional videos in another Reply, and I will be sure to watch those. I also wanted to leave my story here so that others would not feel so alone. Reading the other posts was greatly helpful to me, so I wanted to pass that on and add to it. I hope and pray those who posted years ago are no longer in these situations. Thank you again for the courage to share your story! Peace and safety to all...
My stalkers threatened to murder me and they they did murder my father in 2014 when he tried to get to the bottom of it. My life has been in danger since 2009.
How are you now ? Why aren't they in prison ?
Same here Cristos Palabras.
Little Kitty - Omg ! so, it is the same bad situation in the UK as it is here in Hamburg Germany. I wish I could help you - it has nothing more to do with humanity when noone is helping you out !As you say I do not live either - all I do is protecting me not to end up dead or in jail or worse hospital for the insane.
They killed a friend of us too who always was trying to get to the bottom of it.
That is what my mother and her colleagues are doing to me ever since. I am not quite sure if their are nazis or scientologists or just narcs working for the NWO.Sometimes I cannot believe that my life is the way it is.It is a movie a nightmare a Story. And I hate it.I want children a house a bike and perhaps a nice and caring friendly man. But instead I am a movie star.that is what I am always calling my being.....but ist not funny....We have many russians here killing single people in their flats and everybody knows. And noone cares - they were loners you know and it is war ! I mean they are not wrong, but what a shame that Family are doing nothing. All families are sticking together - mine are dangerously stupid and evil.
Thank you . have been stuck with ( bc of child) a vindictive stalking narcissist for 10 yrs. It took me a LONG time just to have him finally move out bc he was SO charming after I would have him leave again.. he would manipulate his way back in. I had heavy headaches EVERY day for the time we were together. When I finally said he had to find his own place. . he would actually BREAK IN to my place! and I would wake up to him sitting on my bed drunk and pushing my hair back from my face.
Inform people in your family and work about them and call the police, take photos of them, number plates, never use the same travel routes if possible.
It would be highly appreciated if you could make a video on female stalkers and how they differ from male stalkers. Do they differ at all? Are their motivations behind stalking the same as male stalkers motivations?
Good question.
Females are just as crazy as male stalkers!
Still relevant 7 years later 😳
Thank you very much! Very true & value able info
I would'nt reccommend deleting evidence at all. Stalking is hard to prove. If you have proof, keep everything filed and take pictures of things/ people if possible. You might need it for a restrainingorder.
Exceptional info., thank you
Thank you...I just ran into a erotomaniac, he was a childhood friend; I have not seen him in over 26 years ; and he has of me facebook.... he asked for my number and since then it's been crazy...ignoring seems to work for now .... got to be more careful...I am trying everything in my power not to set this person off.but needless to say I am highly Concerned!!!Thanks for the video no really thanks!
what about stalkers who stalk for fun? Psychopathy?
i think so even tho psychopaths prefer to stalk for a reason unless they are also sadists , but usually we do it with a purpose like making her feel unsafe or knowing informations or just trying to find out if she lied to us, so for fun is probably a sadist
Thank you. Educational and scary. I have stalker and this helped.
We previously had a neighbor that stalked a few neighbors. I'm exhausted.
These Apple Airtags aren't helping.
This true! I got a female stalker who i use to like when i was young. She beeen following me for years what make it worst is she became a cop and lied trying to say im stalking her. Lucky my aunt wirk for thd FBI. Do i got proof she lying.. Be very careful.
I could never put my finger on why my brother is the way he is. He called me for two years wanting to see me and when I got there all he did was insult me. I could not believe it. After listening to you I found ,as you say, he was projecting. It turned out he's a cloud without rain as the bible says. Thank you so much. I'm buying your' book. If there is a way to donate to you I will..
What if you stuck two Narcissists in a room or a Narcissist and a Psychopath. How do they reacted to one another?
They probably get along great. They talk about how much they hate someone and figure out how to retaliate on someone who causes them narcissistic injury.
This is the reason why I don't lend out my cellphone number to strangers. If I have their number I'll call them with a hidden number. And I always have my GPS switched off. Never respond to strange messages or numbers.
Nice bookshelf! Would look even nicer as a backdrop for your videos if you arranged the books by spine cover colour.
I have a stalker that is taking me to court for cross examination to have the restraining order dismissed. . I refused to be cross examined and go to court in a couple days to have it extended. my lawyer said refusing the cross examination can backfire but I feel like it's another form of bullying and harassment! I'm the victim why should I have to be interogated, noone is interogated him.. what can I do??? 😢 I dont understand why he wants it dismissed, to be allowed to continue the stalking harassment and cyber bullying?!
Read this Narcissist in court: www.narcissistic-abuse.com/faq78.html
Mr. Vaknin,....Your videos are wonderful.. buying your book today.... When a Narcissist is in a rage... are the insults he says to his spouse true to him? Or is his opinion about his spouse a lie when he is raging? Are the threats true?
I do have a question in regards to my ex-narcissist. Ever since ceasing contact he sends prank recordings to my roommate or other friends disguised as my number to get my attention. He has admitted to doing this before when I was refusing to see him. He also followed me to places he knew I'd be. It has been months since talking to him, yet he still pranks me and reads my online journal. Surely he must have a new NS source by now. Why does he persist in getting my attention months later?
I have 2 neighbors that are sisters and they used to stalk me. It started out really friendly between us then they started lying and accusing me of stuff that I never did and couldn't really convince parents(mommy's and daddy's girls) they did this, this, and that and I never did any of the stuff and they started to try to take pictures of while I was inside and what made them stop is pretend to takes pics of them while walking by and trying to take pics of me inside and started yelling at them so it might cause an audience so they won't do it and long and be hold it worked
that's really creepy for sure! I'm sorry to here that!
Im going through that now! They playing the victim.. Gather proof. Luckily my aunt a cop.
timeless information..
thank you.
mine isn't violent...or i dont feel he is...not nervous at all.
however he likes to make me miserable...like stop by leaving his business card to let me know when he is in town.
putting suttle clues on my car.
SUCH A TURN OFF TO A WOMAN WHO IS ATTRACTED TO STRONG DIRECT MEN.
he is a passive aggressive weak person.
I JUST IGNORE HIM...
HE IS MY PAST AND WILL STAY THERE
How do you know the difference between narc stalking and ero?
Can you speak to a codependent stalking?
Yeah, he is right. Stalkers are not all made of one cloth. I was stalked and have come to the realization that the company who should have protected me was filled with the worst foul people imaginable. Apparently companies think it is easier to rid themselves of the victim to not face any liabilities than to ever admit to their own wrongdoings.
And OMG, did all of these people do wrong. They were all involved in major cheating scandals at work and cheap messing around clubs at work.
The whole organization was foul from the bottom all the way up to management.
There are a lot of them that as I have found out later have major mental problems too.
You do not know that at the time and you think the stalking ends, but then there is a whole foul group of people who all cheat, lie, and project their own wrongdoings that you have to face afterwards.
Hi Sam.
I am reading your Malignant Self-Love: Narc Revisited to help me out with my colleges, and I already got my value back from it.
I run a little company with 5 sales people, 4 of them are narc and 1 a psycho but they do deliver the quotas very well. All were treated badly as kids for leaving the lights on (as light is a power and knowledge from what I gather).I had other rational people work too, but somehow they do not perform as well.
Is there another reason why they perform better?
Hello again, Dr. Paimon would like to know if there is a difference between addictions, obsessions, fixations and power/control. Can obsessions/fixations be treated likewise with addictions? We both have to know the difference where do addictions end with narcissism? (addiction to power?)
Thank you. P and E.
I did the same thing with one that was stalking me; he'd started stalking me just as my husband and I planned to move across the country, two weeks later.
GONE! Never saw him again. :)
I like how the new phones can block the numbers and messages like fb now , feels good not hear from scammers and telemarketers they all sound the same now can't tell them apart, I like how the new phones can help u spam them and report them as spam
Sam, is it possible for someone to be half paranoid and half Narcissist? A mix?
I have been ignoring my coworker stalker but he is emailing my coworkers, whomever I am sitting next to.
He is very very controlling and I feel sick when he is near me. He has really hurt me.
This is scary. I deactivated my social media accounts. I do wanna reactivate them again but how do I know I won't be being watched. I mind as well permanently delete my accounts cuz I definitely don't wanna go through this process of being cyberstalked or not even in person
Me too i just deleted both my fb which she has hijacked! These people are demented sociopaths ! They think in their minds they are the victims
same here! the crazy demented psycho who is stalking me hacked all my phones and hijacked my fb while claiming to hate me but is obsessed with me!! i just made another one and she already hacked into it!! these losers are beyond evil!
my late husband had an affair with a stalker-he passed away about 5 mos. ago-she doesnt know it evidently -constant calls come in on a phone i havent found yet and constant noises around the house-how do you get rid of one like this? i've thought of posting copy of death certificate on wall but not sure what to do.any help -?thank you.
How to Cope with Stalkers and Paranoids
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse21b.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse21a.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse18.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse15.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse16.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily14.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily16.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily17.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily18.html
I think I have a history of Erotomaniac stalkers. May have roped other people into it really bad this time
Omg I going to buy your book I need help I have a stalker he just won't stop . Any info will help me I moved changed my looks
I'm being stalked. I have a feeling I will be killed. My property is what he wants. I'm not giving him the title which, he has asked for. I think it will look like an accidental death. I live alone. He has shown to be cold blooded, ruthless , sadistic , calculating, educated enough to think he is always the smartest man in the room (which he isn't) and thus able to get away with criminal behavior. I believe in Karma....or "Reaping what you Sow". If you hurt others intentionally out of sadistic impulses ....I think it will always come back to "bite you in the butt".... sooner or later. I can't move. I own my home and if I sold it ...I couldn't buy a garage to live in with the high property values going through the ceiling. These days ,a quarter of a million dollars buys you a dump around here . 40 some years ago, the same dump went for $12,000. I guess if you've got a place....you need to hang onto it. The state I live in has one of the highest homeless rates in the nation. People can't afford to buy a home and the rents are like half of their paychecks. It's easy to say move....but can you without making your living situation even worse? I guess if I moved to some place in the North where the weather is bad and the housing is cheaper....or some remote place in the Midwest. But I don't drive. I need to be close to stores and a hospital. ...which means ... properties go up. I hope all stalkers are caught and stopped. They cause enormous pain and suffering to their victims. BTW...I would have to disconnect all phone services because he has hacked into my phone . That would save me quite a bit of money. I have one spare phone that I don't think he can hack into.....but still.
(the upstairs neighbor is a Perp.-stalker (24/7/365) for many, many years...
(I-compliant-to-authority-authority never took-care of it they made it even WORST for me)...
Sam vaknin..please make a CD audio of your book..I would pay a $100 for it..I want to hear you in my car...while I'm doing my daily walk. .while I'm shopping for groceries...I can't sit and watch you on youtube everyday..but I do need your good advice all day everyday..so please do it...record your entire book on audio..please...!!!
my neighbor is stalking my every move & im pissed my boundaries should be respected
i need help putting my stalker behind bars. he has been stalking me for a year now. anything you can do will help me thanks
AMEN BROTHER! EPHESIANS 10
How the heck can you stop it from happening and proving it because im waiting on cameras, in meantime im having isdues getting police cyfs and kindy to believe that its happening. I know mine isn't alone doing the stalking, his stalking behavior has caused the kids routines to be messed up and blames me. Any suggestions please because i have reliable source tell me he will kill me and make it look accidental. I've told police this and they want camera footage, I did have it untill he cut my internet wire on outside so footage was static 😕 he has already tried kidnapping our son who's 4 3x. And he's pushing for full custordy, been 3 years now under the courts in regards to custody. I looked at moving again but he will only find me again, his flying monkey has already tried running me off the road in a massive truck
Yes they are the ones running the show with out a doubt!!!
So do you think a private investigator that is also a stalker is either like an erotomaniac
My new partners ex is stalking him, she’s jealous and I would like to know what I can do for him.. for example, we were in a restaurant and later he said she was also there.. he is using other names in social media but she some how find him and always trying to hack his accounts and so on.. what can I as an outsider in this Situation do to help him?
Should I write her?
I have stalkers now hacking my email and facebook, there's no way around it
yeah ...omg..wtf....i need to stop stalking
Actually 2 by law , all the neighbors, and who knows who else
so im moving out and moving on i gusse
Gaslighting character!!!!
Everywhere I go, within seconds they project the characters of a multitude of different people onto me.
Out of jealousy they often project characters of the opposite gender or the characters that perform on both sides, like they do, onto me
I hitchhiked and now this guy knows where i live and work and keeps writing me letters, what should i do ?
Im honestly really scared
How to Cope with Stalkers and Paranoids
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse21b.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse21a.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse18.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse15.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abuse16.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily14.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily16.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily17.html
vaksam.tripod.com/abusefamily18.html
Showing up where I am, unwanted visits, calling, makibg youtube videos abput me or texting me telling me things to let me know he /she has been stalking me....these are things only a sick and demented person would do knowing you don't like any of the attention from him.
Does anyone know what to do if im experiencing a lot of ptsd from a stalker and stabbing 2 years ago. i hate when ppl talk about their problems on freakin youtube but im dealing with nightmares, fainting spells and some embarrassing personal things like wetting the bed as like side effects. Im a male and 26 years old i feel like a baby but its just getting worse as the months go by. I know the obvious thing would be to see a shrink but I don't know how to explain it but i feel like that would be making me relive it all over again. I can't begin to explain how much I've been going through now. I was stalked non-stop by this guy twice my age at a bar I met. He kept coming up to me at the bar and we got into an altercation after he wouldnt leave me alone. I was followed home and for 5 months of failed advances at my apartment door he became so hateful like i screwed him over so bad. it was hell from there. I got death threat, after death threat on my door. i was followed everywhere almost i went. He would try to get into my apartment from the window at 3am 2 times. I got the police involved but i didnt even know his name and he would be gone when they'd show up. Anyway i tried not to tell too many ppl because im gay and i was 24 when this was going on and i thought ppl would think he was a ex-lover or something and i was 24 and he was 48 so i thought ppl wouldn't care because you never hear of men stalking younger men in their 20's. He started saying in these notes on my door that i was going to be shot and that i deserve to be tourchered it was a terrible thing to say. I tried to be tough but he was so relentless. He would sit outside in one of the parking lots in his car and when i'd go running he would go slow behind me. I honestly wanted to kill him so bad. im a very private person and he violated that aspect of my life. I even stopped running from then on and I couldn't have guys over because i was afraid for their safety. He was in my mind i felt like. I would stop walking around or sleeping in my boxer briefs because i always thought he was trying to look in and see my body and it just grossed me out. long story short i ended up getting fired from my job because he was trying to take me down every second and the police hardly helped at all. I was helpless. after months of non-stop threats i started taking adderoll to stay up at night and was so gone menatlly that one night i didn't think and took my trash out later than usual and from behind me that psycho stuck a knife in my back when i got in the parking lot. At that moment i felt nothing at all i just remember i couldn't breath. After passing out on the ground he ran and hid when my neighbor walking his dog saw me stumble to the ground. The police found him later hiding in a creek bed behind my building. I ended up recovering in the hospital from a punctured lung. And a lot of friends and family FINALLY came to help me. I did get back on my feet physically but mentally i think the damage was done and I've been suffering the consequences ever sense. I started abusing pain pills really bad and drinking, i lost friends and had financial problems. I've become sober now but i cant seem to get over this trauma. I found out after he got arrested who the guy was and that he was schizophrenic and had a real weird "infatuation" that we were supposed to be together and when i rejected him he wanted me dead. Im so stupid for going to that bar or not realizing he followed me home. I know half of this is my fault and i undertstand that. So maybe im just whining but i have to find someone that can help me. I mean i cant hardly date any guys because im so withdrawn and have a hard time opening up. I would say im a attractive guy. And having another person like me feels good and I am a man and have needs. But i just can never commit. So if anyone can please give this guy some adice or let me know about some resources i would appreciate it. Thanks. Sorry this was so long
Chaney Houser wow.. I hope you’re doing better now
Does this erotomania ever expire?
amen!! x
are there micro aggressive types of these personalities?
Narcissistic rage samvak.tripod.com/journal86.html Compared to anger samvak.tripod.com/mask.html
9 years i have had to deal with the eroromaniac so sick of it
JWM did you ever get a protection order?
i made friends with my stalker but than she tries to tell me about my ex girlfriend and its awkward cause i don't care about neither of them lol
I béen stalked ten years
the demented psycho who is stalking me claims to hate me but is very much obsessed with what i do online and everywhere.. smh! she does not think at all what she is doing is bad!! this weirdo will not leave me alone at all!
what to do if he has every single disorder you listed??
impossible , some of these cant coexist
Sue where possible and relevant.
👍
My stalker lives across the street from me... idk what to do.
😂🤣😂🤣
Do you still live there? Mine is next door. Get security cameras. Go pro camera. Get video evidence, take to the police.
My friend has a stalker. They use to be a couple he would tell her parents her friends how easy it would be to kill someone in the desert. It would take months for them to discover the body. When we would tell my friend her boyfriend mentioned this out of the blue, how it's strange he would mention something like that. My friend would say, idk why he would say that. He was joking.
He wanted my friend to quit her job. The boyfriend wanted to buy my friends ex husband off.to give him a large amount of money to sign his parental rights over. We told him my friends ex will not do that. I think thats when she started to see he was not right. She broke up with him. The stalker started to follow her sisters her parents. He would call to say he wanted to see her. My friend would say no!
Stalker: why?
Friend: iam with my sister.
Stalker: no your not. She's with her fiend at Walmart. Let me come over. Your sisters leaving. She will be there in 20 mins.
This continued to happen.
My friend would come home from work she would see black hand prints all over her house. It was a brand new home. My friend lived by herself . She wiped the prints off thinking it was from one of the builders and see just never noticed it until than. The next day when she came home there were more black handprints. When my friend would go visit her parents one of her sisters would ask my friend to go by her house to make sure her garage was down. Since she lived so close to the mom. My friend would go by her sister's house the garbage would be down. She text her sister told her, her garage was down. My friend would She would stay over night with her sisters twice a month. Watch movies talk. One morning my friend woke up she didn't want to wake her sister. My friend took out the trash. When she got to the trash can in front of the house the garage door started to open. My friend thought it was odd but thought jet sister must have woke up and opened the garage. When my friend took the entrance to the garage down the hallway. She heard her sister talking. Knocked on the door went in her sister was still in bed. My friend asked her sister have u been out of bed?
The sister: no
My friend: not at all? You didn't go to the garage?
The sister: no i just now woke up when___ called. Iam gonna Get up to go pee.
My friend: i took out the trash than your garage door started to open.
The sister: what?! Thats the first time thats ever happened when someone eles is here. I was thinking iam losing my mind.
My friend would fly to the midwest every weekend to see her children until the children will be living with her in another state. My friend left one weakened to be within her children. It was her daughters birthday. The party where the celebrated was over. My friend her ex and the children went to leave. When they approached the van kn a cold snowing winter day. The van had writing on every window. Writing said, happy birthday to me iam __ years old. My friends ex husband. The father of the children said, ________(her name)? The daughter said, that wasn't me. The ex husband: _____?
The daughter: it wasnt.
My friend looked around the parking lot and wondered could he be here. My friend told everyone to Get in the van. My friend stayed at her ex until the kids went to sleep. Than went to her other friends house where she would stay when she fly in on the weekends. The next morning my friend was packing to be at work 3 hours to her landing in delay at airport. Stalker calls her phone.
My friend; i gotta go.
Stalker: talk to me.
My friend: i cant.
Stalker: how did you like my message?
My friend: what message?
Stalker: on the windows. Happy birthday to me. Giggle.
My friend: that was you? Why did you do that?
Stalker: just to let you know i was there.
My friend hung up on him.
Just a few things that would continuity happen. Finally my friend dont see or hear from him other than stalker getting a hold of her family and friends on FB Twitter phone. To ask about my friend. My friend about every 2 years or so would get writing on her car out of the blue. Iam here or how are you. Until last week here reached her on FB. She was under a different name. She wondered how did he find me?
My friend just left del taco when he messaged her. He said he just left del taco he ate the exact thing my friend had. The next day my friend was getting a frappuccino. When he messaged her to say he would have brought her a frappuccino. My friend messaged back how did you find me? He avoided the question. My friend would bring him back to how did you find me? Stalker avoided the question. Stalker said he was just trying to bring kindness and I'm a reminisce on memories. The feelings weren't mutual. He said where did i go wrong. Than stalker blocked my friend. Will here leave my friend alone for good now? If not
What can she do to Get stalker off her trail?
How do you translate sticazzi in English?
these dicks, ans there is also "my coglions"
I don't wish these on even people I hate for someone who's being stalked by cyber stalking i understand I get so frustrated even when I ignore still i hate them but i ignore him i use to get mad trust me ladies ignore them like there nothing you will see they hate that i uae get so mad now i just change my life i got private phone he can't get in and mycomputer i don't care what he sees just treat them the scum they are ignore dr is right you see they want attention