"I... I'm afraid he's missing out on his childhood." Says the dad who at the beginning of the movie was punishing him for not being a businessman like his older brothers by denying him his own room, making sure he didn't have any fun at the theme park, and only showing an interest in his life when he was employed by a rich man with, as far as he knew, prospects to become a rich investor. Father of the year, ladies and gentlemen...
So you would rather have your son be told what to do and punished for no reason,or as you call it: “parenting” or have financial stability for the rest of his life insuring that he will be happy for the rest of his days. Give this man a parenting award,ladies and gentlemen!
@@tonysmith4687 Punished for no reason? No. Punished for not being a businessman? Also no. Punished for making bad decisions after being told not to do so? Yes, but we never see that in the movie. Also, it's perfectly possible to be financially stable without being into business, and in fact unless you're extremely lucky you'll likely fall into debt as a businessman because life isn't fair and because parents' money is usually where success in business is found anyway, so telling your kid that you can't be a success without being a businessman is bad parenting.
That is actually part of what those kind of fathers are specially in the 90's when the parents could be the worst kind of guide since they contradicted themselves pretty often, see in home alone 1 and 2, the parents were jerks really jerks and idiots at the same time.
This movie would have been better if Preston was trying to impress a girl his own age (a girl he has a crush on) and not some adult woman. That kissing scene is absolutely disturbing.
That's literally a Fact of Life dude - at least where i live, i don't know about you US or Internationals -... i don't see any problem with that statement.
@@xm_heecka.laddder.job_mx5962 Woah, it’s not a metaphorical fact? Thanks for the clarification. Poverty typically has causes besides not working enough, so far from being advice or some kind of helpful fact, it is just disparaging and a veiled insult... dude.
That birthday kid, judging by his clothing, has no business being a bully. Look at all those colors! He's such an easy target only the cheapest bullies would bother with. The rest of the kids just have to act "Extra nice" around him or his parents are rich
Y’know, wouldn’t it be a lot easier for Preston to keep this illusion up if he just had Henry the limo driver pretend to be Mr Macintosh? That way he doesn’t have to keep making excuses about why nobody can go see him?
Wow it seems like everyone lost in this movie. The little kid preston grew up to get a neck tattoo and get arrested for beating up his girlfriend. The Hot FBI agent got a rare brain disease and partially paralyzed a year after the release of this movie!
That's what I would do, if I didn't abort this premise like the abomination it was for being all about a child committing fraud and an unethical relationship
The 90s was certainly an odd time for Disney. On one hand, they got a team of animators creating some of the best animated films of all time. On the other hand, it’s full of out of touch executives making bland live action shit that does nothing but try to be so “hip” with the kids.
@@robertcarldecker Of course. The Rocketeer The Straight Story Homeward Bound The Parent Trap Muppet Christmas Carol Muppet Treasure Island The Jungle Book ‘94 Cool Runnings
Riley Peeler If I were that kid, I would have hit the library and learned all that I could about stock options and profits. Then hire a consultant and have him invest the money under my instruction. About 50,000 dollars worth of stock (somthing has gotta go up) Then start producing some movies (950,000 dollars is one heck of a head start.) about 200,000 dollars in a sequel. Then invest in microsft. Hire a lawyer before all of this to help me handle the contracts and stuff. Baisically rent an apartment to run all of this out of. And when all this "stollen" million dollar situation hits the fan, I would pay them back with more than I had tooken plus stock options, and have a "sustainable" company to show for all of my hard work. A few years down the line (about 10) , I would probably sell the company and retire at the very ripe age of like 20. Then starting it all up again with the money I got with selling the company and this time, with an indie game company that has a lets playing department. Then I would give a kid a check for 1 million dollars and see what he would do with it. (Yes I would donate to charities and such too) Dont ask why I even thought about this to such an extent.
Some of these films where the kid, "learns a lesson to value his family," make some sense. Some don't. Like this one. Fuck the problems, fuck the dad. Preston has every right to feel mistreated, undervalued, and put upon. He is. Its the dad who needs to learn a lesson.
In fact, he didn't punish the dad nearly enough. Tell him Macintosh wants to pay him double his current salary to manually collect elephant sperm for artificial insemination while he personally bosses him around. When he doesn't want to do it give him the lecture about working and money etc.
Agreed. I hate movies in which the main character is mistreated and yet they’re the ones expected to apologize and change. No. Just no. We need movies in which the antagonists are condemned and shamed like they should be, the protagonist realizes they don’t have to put up with abuse/neglect, etc.
You know what'd been interesting addition to this movie? the fact Steve Jobs appeared in it. Like "Where's Mr. Macintosh?!" "Oh, i'm over here" and he'd appear, i'm surprised they didn't even have a try at a joke like that or such.
I dunno, he's talking about women love the salad bar and buffets. Who the fuck takes a woman to a buffet on their first date? Unless you're Homer Simpson maybe.
Roger Ebert: I hated this movie! Hated, hated, hated, hated, hated this movie! Hated it! Hated every simpering, stupid, vacant, audience-insulting moment of it! Tommy Wiseau: Hahaha, what a story Roger...
1:25 The sad thing is that the cimatographer is Bill Pope, the guy who would later shoot the Matrix movies. He had already done Darkman and Army of Darkness by this point. You think he would come up with a more clever shot than this.
Big Moist I mean if the boy was a girl and the girl was a boy if the boy turned girl was a teenager that would slide. Disney has done that a ton before.
18:39 According to Wikipedia, this kid is eleven. So in "six years" he's going to be seventeen and that woman is going to be (based on the age of the actress at the time) thirty-seven years old.
NOSTALGIA CRITIC!! TONE LOC is a grammy nominated rapper who had a hit album in '89! He is one of the MOST nostalgic 2-hit wonder celebrities ever! 😅😅😅 he even has a song at the end of Ace Ventura "Ace is in the House." He was basically a cameo-type actor for the people in the early 90's who remembered him for his music. Everytime we (young 80s black kids at least) heard his voice or saw him in a movie, we got excited 😅😅 like hey! It's Tone Loc!!
Movies like Blank Check and Milk Money really imply a lot about these disturbing Hollywood writers back then. Granted, it's still bad nowadays, but a lot of them were just blatant about their creepiness to make movies like this.
At least “Milk Money” is PG-13. But if “Blank Check” were released nowadays, it would’ve been made under 20th Century Studios (more as a Hulu film) than Disney due to its unintentional mature content, rating it PG-13
Yeah that's where I first saw it, they actually removed some of the more suggestive bits, like that scene at the end where Preston stares at that lady's picture and goes "on the other hand" implying that he's wishing to be with her.
"A paper reported that a man arrested in Vegas last year had a 'history of questionable actions'. Can you imagine if we were all held to that standard?" - George Carlin, "Brain Droppings". LOL!
I know I commented 3 times already.... but, am I the ONLY one weirded out that DISNEY is setting a romance story between a FULL GROWN WOMAN and a FREAKING CHILD??????! O.O There is so much WTF we're they thinking with this story....
+Glenn Lester O.O WEEEEEeeeeeeel...... that was SORT of innocent, considering he was in a full grown body. BUT STILL WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS! I mean, a cute story is when a child has a small crush on their teacher... -_- that is until Alvin has a FULL FLEDGED fantasy about taking her out on dates and giving her a giant diamond ring. And also fighting Dave for her hand. O.o what is with the whole Child/Adult paring thing??? *head explodes*
+Glenn Lester and THATS when by head explodes. Like, I don't know WHAT to think anymore..... *drops head in shame* considering that was one of my favorite movies.... oh WHY.... Just.... WHY.............
But they have done this story many times before but with the genders swapped and the kid being a few years older (like 4-5 years older) they've even done wedding with those characters.
How old was Preston supposed to be in this movie? I remember really liking it when I was a kid, but now as an adult I can see some problems in the movie. The dialog right before the kiss was pretty bad too, she's going to date him in six years? If he's nine now, which is generous, then he'll still only be 15 in six years.
There are many problems with this movie. The one thing I could never get passed is that in this kid's movie, a child is severely abused by his parents and it's never addressed. They actually make it sound like Preston is greedy and his parents are decent human beings who are in any way fit to raise a kid. The kid doesn't need money. He needs to call child protective services. Sadly, money can't solve all your problems, especially if you're a kid and can't live on your. If money is going to in any way help with the problem, this kid needs a lot more than one million dollars. He's going to need a place to stay when he runs away from home. He's going to have a lot of trouble ever getting a job if there are no adults in his life who teach him anything useful. Not to mention all the therapy and support he'll need. A million dollars won't cover that. If he only knows how to solve his problems using money he's going to need billions of dollars to live a very traumatic life. There are a lot of kid's movies with bad morals, but this is by far the worst. Sadly, too many people believe it to be true. Money is everything. You can buy love. You can buy happiness. Being a good person doesn't matter.
How the fuck are they being abusive because I don’t give him what he wants know if a kid kid is not supposed to get with the fuck they want all the time and back in the 90s that you’ll know what abuses sick and tired of people trying to use that word abuse on things that’s not you don’t have an account of the hell they want all the time and parents do the best uses when your son a beating on your kid or something they’re talking down to them and whatever I didn’t see it as abuse at all and I still don’t see it now there’s things that was probably the movie I see now as an adult but that’s not one of them do I think his father was the best father no I do not I mean I think that his father in this movie was a bad father but that’s about it and the mother was kind of bad to not questioning who met Mr. McIntosh was because he should’ve if his son was working for him and that’s probably the only thing I seen the p
*Better Ending To Blank Check* *Preston’s dad finds out Preston illegally forged the check* *Him, the rest of Preston’s family, Quiggly, and the cops bust down the door and see Preston just standing there* Preston’s Dad: Preston! You committed check fraud to get 1 million dollars?!? Preston: Yup Preston’s Dad: That is it mister! You’re- Preston: I’m what dad? *Throws stacks of cash to the police officers* Preston: You guys still gonna arrest me? Police Officers: *Looking at their money* Oh um, I guess not *The cops leave* Preston’s Dad: You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me *Preston looks back at his dad and smiles smugly* Preston: Y’know dad, it turns out you were right, money really is the root of all happiness, cause you can do whatever the hell you want and no one will touch you as long as you have it *Preston walks up to his dad and hands him a stack of cash* Preston: *Looking up at his dad* Will they? Preston’s Dad: *Looks at the ground, sighs and shakes his head* No Preston: *Smiles* That’s what I thought *Preston makes his way to the door, stops, looks behind him and gives everyone the finger* Preston: Kiss my ass bitches *Preston turns around and leaves*
I remember actually liking this movie when I was like... 5? It was long enough ago that I looked at the main character and thought "I wonder if I'll ever be that cool when I get to be his age". I was of course nowhere anywhere near able to understand the movie's plot and can only remember the colorful montages and hilllllaaaaaarious hijinks. My barely functioning brain did, however, certainly appreciate those bits of whimsical fantasy that can only come from a movie about a kid with enough money to do anything.
"So I guess the moral of the story is, 'Bad deeds always go unpunished and money is the root of all happiness'." Sounds like Mitch McConnell's favorite movie.
So did I. Somehow, when they left the choice of what to watch the last day before spring break to the class, this won out. At one point, my fellow classmates also chose The Master of Disguise. We were certainly unique school kids.
I remembered my over excited friend telling me the synopsis about this in 93. Watching it yesterday, it's got a bit of the Great Gatsby feel to it but was sad about the limo driver needing more in his life than Preston . The guy lined his pockets at buffets. He's the one who needed help.
Every time I see Preston's Dad, I think of McFlemp from the Adventures of PETE & PETE episode "Farewell, My Little Viking" (yeah, I know, same actor), and expect him to go "Hey, no pressure!"
If you look closely, there's actually something a little strange on Preston's expenses log. A payment for Plan 442. Of $300,000. Back before he even got his dad's company to start doing work on the castle. Yep. He's officially a far more caring member of the family than his douchebag dad. Maybe the dad changed his tune at the end of the movie, but Preston didn't need to have some major realization to start giving a shit.
+Ossama Elshimy It depends on howmuch of the script was his fault. Usually when you have several "co-writers" there's most likely one main writer with just bits and pieces or loaned concepts from the other writers.
Kinda wish the dad was arrested at the end of the movie. Havent watched the thing myself but how neglectful and uncaring he is towards his son who lost the bike in a car accident makes me wish CPS was called for investigation.
The kid didn’t make it clear he was in an accident so the parents thought he just ruined his bike doing something dumb as a young boy I did do stupid stuff with my bike lol
The 90's world was *Infinitely* more normal than It Is In this shithole nightmare today , I doubt many people would disagree with me , even teens who never experienced the 90s.
The dad in this movie was such an irredeemably greedy and heartless piece of shit that it did not feel gratifying at all seeing him make peace with his son. You just feel bad for the kid and wish that he didn't have a father who only held respect for people who were making money.
Even though I think the film is okay, I do agree with y'all, the Father could've been written a lot better. And in fact, the movie itself could've done better with a slight rewrite.
Fun fact, Tone Loc who plays Juice here, was 28 years old at the time. Another fun fact: he was borh on March 3rd, the date of my birthday, and I'm 28 now.
As Number 2 pointed out, a million dollars isn’t really a lot of money and it wasn’t that much in the early 90s when this movie came out. It would’ve been a little more believable if the check was for $20 million.
This is one of those movies i know full well is awful... But ill always love this movie. It will forever remind me of how it felt to be a kid that naively liked horrible movies. But for the good reasons.
To be fair, when I was like 10, I had no real interest in the opposite sex either - But I did have that one afterschool tutor who was probably in her late teens/early twenties that left with this sense of longing
This review is mentioned in the Wikipedia page for the movie, crediting you as the person who raised concerns about the adult woman kissing the young boy.
“MY NAME IS MACINTOSH.” Poor Apple. They were already going through a big slump in the mid 90’s, but being in this god awful piece of shit? Good god, that’s just terrible.
I remember back in the 90's when "A Million Dollars" was just shorthand for "All the money".
One MILLION DOLLURS.
@@ExplorerDS6789 One hundred billion dollars! MWAHAHAHAHAHA! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
When I was in kindergarten, everybody thought that $100 meant RICH.
We sold our software...for a billion dollars!
*everyone starts clapping*
@@funkyweapon1981 ONE BILLION GIGILLION SHISHILLION SHIBELDIBOO SHABELDIBEE.... YEN!
"I... I'm afraid he's missing out on his childhood." Says the dad who at the beginning of the movie was punishing him for not being a businessman like his older brothers by denying him his own room, making sure he didn't have any fun at the theme park, and only showing an interest in his life when he was employed by a rich man with, as far as he knew, prospects to become a rich investor. Father of the year, ladies and gentlemen...
Don't forget talking down to his son after he was nearly run over, and killed, by a car.
@@ryantyler9677 precisely!
So you would rather have your son be told what to do and punished for no reason,or as you call it: “parenting” or have financial stability for the rest of his life insuring that he will be happy for the rest of his days. Give this man a parenting award,ladies and gentlemen!
@@tonysmith4687 Punished for no reason? No. Punished for not being a businessman? Also no. Punished for making bad decisions after being told not to do so? Yes, but we never see that in the movie. Also, it's perfectly possible to be financially stable without being into business, and in fact unless you're extremely lucky you'll likely fall into debt as a businessman because life isn't fair and because parents' money is usually where success in business is found anyway, so telling your kid that you can't be a success without being a businessman is bad parenting.
That is actually part of what those kind of fathers are specially in the 90's when the parents could be the worst kind of guide since they contradicted themselves pretty often, see in home alone 1 and 2, the parents were jerks really jerks and idiots at the same time.
This movie would have been better if Preston was trying to impress a girl his own age (a girl he has a crush on) and not some adult woman. That kissing scene is absolutely disturbing.
Thank you! (And I mean that sincerely.) Someone with actual good movie ideas!
I ha thought she was gonna fake him
Who knows why anybody at Disney of all places thought that scene was ever a good idea.
"You're on thin ice" HE WAS HIT BY A FREAKIN CAR lol christ
I get the feeling Preston didn't tell his parents about how he was nearly hit by a car. He probably lied and said he left his bike in a parking lot.
The Dad is the kind of person who would tell a poor person "Just work harder and you'll make more money!"
Ah, he’s Andrew Ryan
That's literally a Fact of Life dude - at least where i live, i don't know about you US or Internationals -... i don't see any problem with that statement.
@@xm_heecka.laddder.job_mx5962 Woah, it’s not a metaphorical fact? Thanks for the clarification. Poverty typically has causes besides not working enough, so far from being advice or some kind of helpful fact, it is just disparaging and a veiled insult... dude.
@@johnbones3455 or Calvin's father
this movie exists
SERIOUSLY, HOW THE HELL DID THEY GET AWAY WITH A WOMAN KISSING A BOY ON THE LIPS!?!
because it is not a man kissing a girl
how is it any better?
Vixorous because gender card
+asgth th Exactly! South Park also made an episode like that when Ike has a "relationship" with his teacher.
+OmegaBlackHeart but that's South park it's known for that stuff
According to this movie, paedophilia, exploitation, and stealing are A-OK.
+Shy Gigyas 100% Micheal Jackson approved.
A faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamily picture...
+Fox Carlson you know for KIDS
+Fox Carlson That's the Disney quality seal!
+Fox Carlson F@#kin' Disney and their old bullshit moralities back then.
"Not even Donald Trump could have a house like that..." Little did he know... xD
And this review is now dated.
The Horror
Hilarious in hindsight.
He has a big White House
it was plain incorrect even at the time. dammit his nyc house has like a million bathrooms
That birthday kid, judging by his clothing, has no business being a bully. Look at all those colors! He's such an easy target only the cheapest bullies would bother with. The rest of the kids just have to act "Extra nice" around him or his parents are rich
It was the 90's. Rainbow was the style.
I was a kid in the 90's. If a kid his age dressed like that, he wasn't making it home that night
Was this what the kids referred to as "Stylin" in the 80's? Was the more colorful there clothes were directly proportional to their wealth?
Not only that, but he's also a ginger.
Any kid dressed like a beach ball is gonna get their ass handed to them
I love how they kept the kiss when this film was brought to Disney+
But boobs in a couple of Disney cartoons are censored. That sounds like Hollywood just being honest about how sick they are.
I think they removed the film from Disney+
@@Samwise_Ass my sister has this film on her Disney+ watchlist
@@Samwise_Ass no they didn’t
@@christhornycroft3686 censorship stupid !
"I want something." You're grounded, kid.
"I almost died" You're grounded, kid.
Scumbag dad.
Not going to make a GoAnimate joke.
Uh he was the killer kid in the movie Mikey. So technically he did.
He's like Butters' dad.
The Goldfish is the best actor in the movie
69th like 👍
Yes
Y’know, wouldn’t it be a lot easier for Preston to keep this illusion up if he just had Henry the limo driver pretend to be Mr Macintosh? That way he doesn’t have to keep making excuses about why nobody can go see him?
Too late Quigley got it covered
I guess is issue is people would realise his voice is different
Re-watching this review in honor of the late Miguel Ferrer, who played Quigley in this movie. R.I.P.
You can watch him in this like vampire Stephen King movie on the interwebs
And Bob Morton from Robocop
He was also the Heretic leader in Halo 2
I remember him more from the Teri Hatcher episode of Tales from the Crypt 🧐
Shan Yu from Disney's Mulan
Wow it seems like everyone lost in this movie. The little kid preston grew up to get a neck tattoo and get arrested for beating up his girlfriend. The Hot FBI agent got a rare brain disease and partially paralyzed a year after the release of this movie!
actually the limo driver went on to do a lot of great movies. Sadly tho he died a few years back
The curse continues!
Miguel Ferrer now too
He was also in Class Act with Kid 'N Play.
NooB-Noob And Tone Loc lives in obscurity now
They could've at least had a blank check (pardon the accidental pun) and animate a hand writing the film's title on it.
that's what I thought
i know write and people could put the credits on the bills
That's what I would do, if I didn't abort this premise like the abomination it was for being all about a child committing fraud and an unethical relationship
Like Honey, I Shrunk the Kids kind of opening.
Accidental? No, that's the point. It's a visual pun that illustrates what happens in the movie.
I bet they only thought the kiss scene was appropriate because of the "women can't be pedophiles" stereotype.
That was a stereotype?
Doesn't matter. She deserves the same disgraceful treatment like Gary Glitter, Bill Cosby, Jimmy Savile, Jared of Subway, R. Kelly and John K.
@@haywardsebastian3713 ‘Fraid so, my man
@@kaijukid1443 Jesus. That is sad.
@@haywardsebastian3713 I know...
The 90s was certainly an odd time for Disney. On one hand, they got a team of animators creating some of the best animated films of all time. On the other hand, it’s full of out of touch executives making bland live action shit that does nothing but try to be so “hip” with the kids.
All good points. Isn’t it strange how only the worst parts of history repeat themselves?
@@gideonbrown4215They just have new flavors of the same trash
Were there any good live action Disney films in the 90s?
@@robertcarldecker Of course.
The Rocketeer
The Straight Story
Homeward Bound
The Parent Trap
Muppet Christmas Carol
Muppet Treasure Island
The Jungle Book ‘94
Cool Runnings
@@supermariofan03 what about The Santa Clause?
Tone Loc is the guy that made the masterpiece of music known as Funky Cold Medina.
Thanks. Making sure somebody told him! 👍👍👍
That movie better not have ruined his career😂😂😂
@@nostalgiajumper0233 don’t forget he was on Ace Ventura: Pet Detective also
and dont forget Wild thing
Tone LOC tribe, got beat up by the booyaatribe in los Angeles
BUTT TWO FACE is my favorite Batman villain.
that house would be worth way more than 1 million
I agree. You really wouldn't get the amount of stuff in real life with a million dollars. It's just not physically possible.
But he bought a CASTLE
Riley Peeler If I were that kid, I would have hit the library and learned all that I could about stock options and profits. Then hire a consultant and have him invest the money under my instruction. About 50,000 dollars worth of stock (somthing has gotta go up) Then start producing some movies (950,000 dollars is one heck of a head start.) about 200,000 dollars in a sequel. Then invest in microsft. Hire a lawyer before all of this to help me handle the contracts and stuff. Baisically rent an apartment to run all of this out of. And when all this "stollen" million dollar situation hits the fan, I would pay them back with more than I had tooken plus stock options, and have a "sustainable" company to show for all of my hard work.
A few years down the line (about 10) , I would probably sell the company and retire at the very ripe age of like 20. Then starting it all up again with the money I got with selling the company and this time, with an indie game company that has a lets playing department. Then I would give a kid a check for 1 million dollars and see what he would do with it. (Yes I would donate to charities and such too) Dont ask why I even thought about this to such an extent.
kyotheman69 This movie was made in the 90s. Even back then, a million dollars would not have bought you a house like that.
Arlo It sure as heck could rent it.
Watching Nostalgia critic for so long when I was younger makes me nostalgic for nostalgia critic
Some of these films where the kid, "learns a lesson to value his family," make some sense. Some don't. Like this one. Fuck the problems, fuck the dad. Preston has every right to feel mistreated, undervalued, and put upon. He is. Its the dad who needs to learn a lesson.
In fact, he didn't punish the dad nearly enough. Tell him Macintosh wants to pay him double his current salary to manually collect elephant sperm for artificial insemination while he personally bosses him around. When he doesn't want to do it give him the lecture about working and money etc.
Agreed. I hate movies in which the main character is mistreated and yet they’re the ones expected to apologize and change. No. Just no. We need movies in which the antagonists are condemned and shamed like they should be, the protagonist realizes they don’t have to put up with abuse/neglect, etc.
I've seen this review several times and I still don't remember what happened in this movie. That's how bland it is
Killpop3313, that's how I feel about The Secret Life Of Pets.
You know what'd been interesting addition to this movie? the fact Steve Jobs appeared in it.
Like "Where's Mr. Macintosh?!" "Oh, i'm over here" and he'd appear, i'm surprised they didn't even have a try at a joke like that or such.
The fact he appeared...? He...didn’t...appear in it.
@@lookbovine I think he meant to say "You know what would have been an interesting addition to this movie? If Steve Jobs appeared as Mr. Macintosh"
Clever writing that would be, too much credit, you give.
Chank Bleck is very fitting for a title
Bleh heh heh heh! Bleck!
MetalSonicReject I know, right?
18:44 he's like 8 at most. So in 6 years, he'll be 14 *at best.* This is *still* creepy as hell.
I think he’s 11 if I remember
@@pleaseshutup7053 does that make it any less creepy that an adult is hitting on a preteen?
@@alexjewett7455 it’s Disney they are the creepiest most fake woke company around. They will never be cancelled tho
I was so disturbed looking at it.
No not less bad but more accurate :p
5:29
"what I want, is an acting coach to help me sound convincing. And a script doctor to write plausible dialogue."
You could say... THE CREATIVITY WAS LEFT BLANK. badum tshhh.
MacinTalk: "My name is Macintosh."
Me (Doing Big Mac (From MLP: FiM): "Eeyup."
You Gotta Admit The Limo Driver’s Great at Giving Kids a Real Boost of Confidence
Darn right
Happy Hogan has been around since the sixties.
Henry was freaking awesome!!
And the line about skinning the cats was hilarious
I dunno, he's talking about women love the salad bar and buffets. Who the fuck takes a woman to a buffet on their first date? Unless you're Homer Simpson maybe.
Love the limo driver he was awesome
7:45 Ah, the 90s, when you could buy a castle for $300,000.
3:50 Oh hi Siskel and Ebert. (Read in Tommy Wiseau voice.)
Oh hi Mark
@@SuperBartman2000 Hey Johnny what's up?
Roger Ebert: I hated this movie! Hated, hated, hated, hated, hated this movie! Hated it! Hated every simpering, stupid, vacant, audience-insulting moment of it!
Tommy Wiseau: Hahaha, what a story Roger...
Am I the only one who absolutely hates this kids voice? He keeps sounding like he's trying to whisper seductively!! It is so annoying!!
1:25 The sad thing is that the cimatographer is Bill Pope, the guy who would later shoot the Matrix movies. He had already done Darkman and Army of Darkness by this point. You think he would come up with a more clever shot than this.
That kiss...!!! Ugh!! Reverse the genders and that shit would never fly. Double standards much?
the law in america heavily favores women.
+Robert Harris which is still bullshit
The strange thing is that would fly if when the genders switched she became a young teenager. They could even have a wedding scene with them.
+the telekinetic rock huh?
Big Moist I mean if the boy was a girl and the girl was a boy if the boy turned girl was a teenager that would slide. Disney has done that a ton before.
18:39 According to Wikipedia, this kid is eleven. So in "six years" he's going to be seventeen and that woman is going to be (based on the age of the actress at the time) thirty-seven years old.
Nostalgia Critic helped me though a rough time in my life. Always be thankful for these older episodes.
NOSTALGIA CRITIC!! TONE LOC is a grammy nominated rapper who had a hit album in '89! He is one of the MOST nostalgic 2-hit wonder celebrities ever! 😅😅😅 he even has a song at the end of Ace Ventura "Ace is in the House." He was basically a cameo-type actor for the people in the early 90's who remembered him for his music. Everytime we (young 80s black kids at least) heard his voice or saw him in a movie, we got excited 😅😅 like hey! It's Tone Loc!!
“Loak”
A 7 year old boy and a 32 year old FBI agent... still a better love story than twilight.
I'm afraid I'm gonna have to disagree for once, cause pedophilia is bad mkay
I agree!
No it's not!!
+Jon Plays I'd let her touch me any way she wants
+Aaron Foust Twilight was an 116-year-old man and a 15-year-old girl, so...
7:12 “don’t make me sing about how I’m gonna eat ya” 😂😂😂😂classic line
He's invited to a birthday party of a kid he doesn't like. That's unfamiliar to you. What kind of a childhood did you have.
True
Whenever that happens I always assume it's the kid's mom who invites them
Yeah that’s super common. Especially when a mom invites the entire class or something.
Never happened to me
"Come back to see me in 6 years"
Uh...11+6=17. STILL NOT OKAY.
Preston is 7 years old that is much worse.
No, the Critic was just being sarcastic. Preston was 11 in this movie, though in real life Brian Bonsall was 13.
yeah it is, in some states the age of consent is 16.
@@jadedheartsz That still doesn't make it okay, and I am NOT getting into a debate on why this is undeniably morally wrong.
@@TheChaosDragoness uh yeah it does dumbass troll
Movies like Blank Check and Milk Money really imply a lot about these disturbing Hollywood writers back then. Granted, it's still bad nowadays, but a lot of them were just blatant about their creepiness to make movies like this.
Always liked Milk Money and Blank Check , I wish society still made movies like this , at least people didn't take themselves so seriously.
At least “Milk Money” is PG-13. But if “Blank Check” were released nowadays, it would’ve been made under 20th Century Studios (more as a Hulu film) than Disney due to its unintentional mature content, rating it PG-13
"And their officially more dysfunctional than the Manson Family."
I think the Griffin Family have that distinction.
Disney used to play this a lot. Come to think of it, The Disney Channel played a lot of borderline questionable things.
Yeah that's where I first saw it, they actually removed some of the more suggestive bits, like that scene at the end where Preston stares at that lady's picture and goes "on the other hand" implying that he's wishing to be with her.
"A paper reported that a man arrested in Vegas last year had a 'history of questionable actions'. Can you imagine if we were all held to that standard?" - George Carlin, "Brain Droppings". LOL!
I know I commented 3 times already.... but, am I the ONLY one weirded out that DISNEY is setting a romance story between a FULL GROWN WOMAN and a FREAKING CHILD??????! O.O There is so much WTF we're they thinking with this story....
+Glenn Lester O.O WEEEEEeeeeeeel...... that was SORT of innocent, considering he was in a full grown body. BUT STILL WRONG IN SO MANY WAYS! I mean, a cute story is when a child has a small crush on their teacher... -_- that is until Alvin has a FULL FLEDGED fantasy about taking her out on dates and giving her a giant diamond ring. And also fighting Dave for her hand. O.o what is with the whole Child/Adult paring thing??? *head explodes*
+Glenn Lester and THATS when by head explodes. Like, I don't know WHAT to think anymore..... *drops head in shame* considering that was one of my favorite movies.... oh WHY.... Just.... WHY.............
But they have done this story many times before but with the genders swapped and the kid being a few years older (like 4-5 years older) they've even done wedding with those characters.
razorjake Yeah having sex with a grown child in an adult's body is like having sex with a mentally handicapped
Yeah, live-action Disney films from the '90s don't hold up well.
These are my favorite NC reviews the horrible 90s family comedies
I want him to review House Arrest (1996) my God that film was so fucking awful and mean spirited! Kids had it fucking ruff in the 90s.
@@03bgood Oh god I forgot that existed. Big stars were in that crap hole.
@@jeremiahhester6408 Is that the one with Jennifer Love Hewitt?
@@sean.furlong1989 The one with Jamie Lee Curtis.
@@jeremiahhester6408 What's the 90s film I thinking of where the teens lock their parents up in a house across the street?
How old was Preston supposed to be in this movie? I remember really liking it when I was a kid, but now as an adult I can see some problems in the movie. The dialog right before the kiss was pretty bad too, she's going to date him in six years? If he's nine now, which is generous, then he'll still only be 15 in six years.
Im pretty sure Preston is supposed to be twelve
The only thing I remembered about this movie was seeing the kiss. Many, many years later, and it's still disturbing as hell and further.
There are many problems with this movie. The one thing I could never get passed is that in this kid's movie, a child is severely abused by his parents and it's never addressed. They actually make it sound like Preston is greedy and his parents are decent human beings who are in any way fit to raise a kid. The kid doesn't need money. He needs to call child protective services. Sadly, money can't solve all your problems, especially if you're a kid and can't live on your. If money is going to in any way help with the problem, this kid needs a lot more than one million dollars. He's going to need a place to stay when he runs away from home. He's going to have a lot of trouble ever getting a job if there are no adults in his life who teach him anything useful. Not to mention all the therapy and support he'll need. A million dollars won't cover that. If he only knows how to solve his problems using money he's going to need billions of dollars to live a very traumatic life.
There are a lot of kid's movies with bad morals, but this is by far the worst. Sadly, too many people believe it to be true. Money is everything. You can buy love. You can buy happiness. Being a good person doesn't matter.
How the fuck are they being abusive because I don’t give him what he wants know if a kid kid is not supposed to get with the fuck they want all the time and back in the 90s that you’ll know what abuses sick and tired of people trying to use that word abuse on things that’s not you don’t have an account of the hell they want all the time and parents do the best uses when your son a beating on your kid or something they’re talking down to them and whatever I didn’t see it as abuse at all and I still don’t see it now there’s things that was probably the movie I see now as an adult but that’s not one of them do I think his father was the best father no I do not I mean I think that his father in this movie was a bad father but that’s about it and the mother was kind of bad to not questioning who met Mr. McIntosh was because he should’ve if his son was working for him and that’s probably the only thing I seen the p
*Better Ending To Blank Check*
*Preston’s dad finds out Preston illegally forged the check*
*Him, the rest of Preston’s family, Quiggly, and the cops bust down the door and see Preston just standing there*
Preston’s Dad: Preston! You committed check fraud to get 1 million dollars?!?
Preston: Yup
Preston’s Dad: That is it mister! You’re-
Preston: I’m what dad? *Throws stacks of cash to the police officers*
Preston: You guys still gonna arrest me?
Police Officers: *Looking at their money* Oh um, I guess not
*The cops leave*
Preston’s Dad: You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me
*Preston looks back at his dad and smiles smugly*
Preston: Y’know dad, it turns out you were right, money really is the root of all happiness, cause you can do whatever the hell you want and no one will touch you as long as you have it
*Preston walks up to his dad and hands him a stack of cash*
Preston: *Looking up at his dad* Will they?
Preston’s Dad: *Looks at the ground, sighs and shakes his head* No
Preston: *Smiles* That’s what I thought
*Preston makes his way to the door, stops, looks behind him and gives everyone the finger*
Preston: Kiss my ass bitches
*Preston turns around and leaves*
Love that ending
If Preston was Cartmen
"I don't even think Donald Trump could have a house like this!"
You mean the White House?
ULGROTHA I appreciate.
ULGROTHA The joke still works actually, even the U.S president can't afford that.
Bradley Cohen lol
In Hugo Weaving as V's voice: Not anymore.
I remember actually liking this movie when I was like... 5? It was long enough ago that I looked at the main character and thought "I wonder if I'll ever be that cool when I get to be his age". I was of course nowhere anywhere near able to understand the movie's plot and can only remember the colorful montages and hilllllaaaaaarious hijinks. My barely functioning brain did, however, certainly appreciate those bits of whimsical fantasy that can only come from a movie about a kid with enough money to do anything.
Could you imagine if the end of this film was like Scarface?
Say hello to my little friend!
18:50 a FAMILY picture
nah, a FAAAAAAMIIILLYYYYY pikchya
@@ThereIsNoMatch You aren't saying it right
A FAAAAMLY pixctr
This was my favorite movie growing up. Just saw it again today since then. Disturbed to my core!!
13:28
Sounds a lot like the Kingpin to me.
"You embarrassed me in front of her!"
CAN YOU PLEASE DO THE MOVIE "HEAVYWEIGHTS"!
OMG, yes!
And “First Kid.”
No, he didn't.
Yes
He should also do "Where the Dead Go to Die". It's a piece of shit and also a pedophile's wet dream
"So I guess the moral of the story is, 'Bad deeds always go unpunished and money is the root of all happiness'." Sounds like Mitch McConnell's favorite movie.
All Republicans really, including the “orange man”
And it includes pedophilia so it's also Matt Gaetz's favorite movie.
To think I actually had to WATCH this movie at school...
So did I. Somehow, when they left the choice of what to watch the last day before spring break to the class, this won out.
At one point, my fellow classmates also chose The Master of Disguise.
We were certainly unique school kids.
Me too....
that kiss makes me want to throw up
Uh.... that happened at a school I taught at. And yes, I did hold back screaming “BAD TOUCH!”
I wish they showed this at my school instead of fucking Patch Adams.
To be honest we watched some really weird things in school in the 90’s…. I never even thought about it until now
The Dad really needs to tone it down with Ayn Rand
A man chooses a slave obeys.
@@MinscFromBaldursGate92 Like my reply; would you kindly?
Critic when are we getting a Nostalgia Critic review of one of the greatest trilogies of all time, The Mighty Ducks!
I remembered my over excited friend telling me the synopsis about this in 93. Watching it yesterday, it's got a bit of the Great Gatsby feel to it but was sad about the limo driver needing more in his life than Preston . The guy lined his pockets at buffets. He's the one who needed help.
I actually really liked this movie as a kid, I'd watch it every time it was on.
I have no idea why.
Every time I see Preston's Dad, I think of McFlemp from the Adventures of PETE & PETE episode "Farewell, My Little Viking" (yeah, I know, same actor), and expect him to go "Hey, no pressure!"
This movie is actually a guilty pleasure for me, minus the kiss at the end. Amazing how they got away with that.
If you look closely, there's actually something a little strange on Preston's expenses log.
A payment for Plan 442. Of $300,000. Back before he even got his dad's company to start doing work on the castle.
Yep. He's officially a far more caring member of the family than his douchebag dad. Maybe the dad changed his tune at the end of the movie, but Preston didn't need to have some major realization to start giving a shit.
R.I.P Miguel Ferrer
Amethyst Farah The guy who played Shan Yu in Mulan.
@Amethyst Farah RoboCop's creater.
Limo actor is dead now too as well as the dad actor
I Like Juice’s License Plate Shirt
That’s Tone Loc
@@paulienuti8031 ok
“Don’t make me sing about how I’m gonna eat ya”
One of the co-writers of this movie was the author of the "Save the Cat" series of books about screenwriting, and it was a smash hit!
+Ossama Elshimy It depends on howmuch of the script was his fault. Usually when you have several "co-writers" there's most likely one main writer with just bits and pieces or loaned concepts from the other writers.
Well at least the kid probably had fun filming this...
Sure he did
Blank check certainly feels like a 90s film.
Kinda wish the dad was arrested at the end of the movie. Havent watched the thing myself but how neglectful and uncaring he is towards his son who lost the bike in a car accident makes me wish CPS was called for investigation.
The kid didn’t make it clear he was in an accident so the parents thought he just ruined his bike doing something dumb as a young boy I did do stupid stuff with my bike lol
You know a film is bad if not even Miguel Ferrer can't save it. And he even makes NCIS: Los Angeles watchable.
this is like a G rated boku no piko
+jamin “j-dog8888888” long This was G-rated??? You've got to be kidding me! 18:50 would rank that in the R-rating!
G-rated Boku no Pico meets Ayn Rand.
RIP Michael Lerner (the banker; he was also in Barton Fink and Elf)
He was also Mayor Ebert in 1998's Godzilla, hahahaha!
18:49 There is no way in goddamn hell they would get away with this today. In fact, the entire romance subplot would also not be allowed today!
I'd have found it really funny if the cops at the end arrested her immediately after that horrific kiss
I loved the Michael Jackson joke, is it awkward that I didn't know he died until 2012?
Uh yeah, pretty awkward
Before you guys call me a troll, I didn't know much about him and I was still very young at the time
+Mediawatcher it's okay bro we understand
+Mediawatcher the heck? How old are u, squirt?
He died?!
It's pronounced Tone Loke. Like saying Loki but without the "ee" part. That's how you say Tone Loc's name
According to Donald trump, this kid is extremely poor
I...I kinda found the limo driver funny....
Eh, no shame in admitting that.
That's Rick Ducommun, he was best known for playing Art Weingartner in Joe Dante's "The 'Burbs." He passed away on June 12th, 2015.
Savannah C I concur; he kinda reminds me of Happy Hogan from Iron Man.
I think he was the dad in "Scary Movie."
I think he was the priest in Scary Movie 2
Let it be known that someone thought it would be a good idea for a grown adult and a child to have a romantic kiss. What has the world come to?
The 90's world was *Infinitely* more normal than It Is In this shithole nightmare today , I doubt many people would disagree with me , even teens who never experienced the 90s.
@@fawkkyutuu8851 I completely agree with you.
Shay: Is he an entrepreneur?
Preston: No he's American
🤣🤣🤣
That was kinda funny
The dad in this movie was such an irredeemably greedy and heartless piece of shit that it did not feel gratifying at all seeing him make peace with his son. You just feel bad for the kid and wish that he didn't have a father who only held respect for people who were making money.
Even though I think the film is okay, I do agree with y'all, the Father could've been written a lot better. And in fact, the movie itself could've done better with a slight rewrite.
Fun fact, Tone Loc who plays Juice here, was 28 years old at the time.
Another fun fact: he was borh on March 3rd, the date of my birthday, and I'm 28 now.
As Number 2 pointed out, a million dollars isn’t really a lot of money and it wasn’t that much in the early 90s when this movie came out. It would’ve been a little more believable if the check was for $20 million.
This is one of those movies i know full well is awful... But ill always love this movie. It will forever remind me of how it felt to be a kid that naively liked horrible movies. But for the good reasons.
Honestly, it was a fun little kids movie for its time in 1994. But yes it is forgotten about now
RIP Rick Ducummon, Miguel Ferrer, and James Rebhorn.
That kiss was gross. I threw up a little in my mouth.
Salacious Thatch Watch her lips and where they land closely. I seriously can't believe everyone missed this
The Bun according to you and one other, she apparently did
10:33 "I am the Nostalgia Critic and I approve this message."
A woman kissing a little kid?! Call the FBI!!! Oh, wait, she IS the FBI. Well crud.......
Let's not forget, somehow THIS film, with a adult woman kissing a juvenile boy, is considered appropriate for Disney+, but "Love, Victor" wasn't.
To be fair, when I was like 10, I had no real interest in the opposite sex either - But I did have that one afterschool tutor who was probably in her late teens/early twenties that left with this sense of longing
Ya but I bet they didn’t return your attraction
This review is mentioned in the Wikipedia page for the movie, crediting you as the person who raised concerns about the adult woman kissing the young boy.
“MY NAME IS MACINTOSH.” Poor Apple. They were already going through a big slump in the mid 90’s, but being in this god awful piece of shit? Good god, that’s just terrible.
The guy who wrote the screenplay for this movie also wrote a series of books on screenwriting.
Probably that's why most Hollywood movies are so badly written nowadays. The writers learned the trade from his books.
At that age it was hard enough for a cashier to believe I legally owned 10 to 20 dollars let alone a million xD
I just realised that the kid in this movie is Worf's son Alexander from Star Trek: The Next Generation