Letting Someone Go | Taoism for Broken Hearts
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 มิ.ย. 2024
- The philosophy of Taoism revolves around letting go, accepting, yielding, and going with the flow. All Taoist sages seem to agree that it’s better to be detached and indifferent, allow change to happen, and move along with life’s constant transformations than to resist change and cling to what’s already in the past.
When we are romantically involved with someone, we often see the opposite happening of what the Taoists teach. We attach, we cling, we control, and we’re usually very fearful of being abandoned by the person who generates immense bliss within ourselves. At the peak of the so-called honeymoon phase,’ when everything seems carefree, joyful, and happy, we wish it would never end. But as we all know: this period of mutual infatuation never lasts.
No feeling is final. The changing nature of our emotional world causes us to fall out of love, sometimes as quickly as we fall in love. When feelings change, the relationship changes. Frequently, the consequence of declined feelings of attraction, for whatever reason, is a breakup.
Such a drastic change is challenging to handle, especially when the decline in attraction isn’t mutual.
For some, it takes years (or even a lifetime) to get over someone. Others never truly accept the breakup and move Heaven and Earth to win back their old flame, to no avail.
When we cannot change outside circumstances, the only way to move forward is to change ourselves, including how we look at the situation at hand. The Taoist ideas in this video could help us see the breakup (and heartbreak in general) in another light.
Letting Someone Go | Taoism for Broken Hearts
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#TAOISM #LETTINGGO #LAOTZU
00:00 - Intro
01:53 - Holding on
04:33 - A blessing in disguise
06:57 - Embracing impermanence
09:29 - Letting go
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Don’t waste your time on people who don’t see your value. Spend it on yourself and others that actually support and care for u.
Amen. Hey wait...I'm a Taoist Monk. Bless Lord Buddha.
what about people who do see your value and care for you? What if they're taken away?
@@Happy-xn6hd It's one of the things that are beyond our control.
@@Happy-xn6hd Then remind yourself that they were there at all.
Be gratefull you had them. You couldve been born in world that didnt have them in the first place.
Then after a while of mouring, youll find more people again that appreciate you
I want to lavish myself with better and beautiful people who are like me
Trying to win back your ex usually just makes it worse. Letting go is investing in yourself instead.
This
I love Spider-Man.
@@satnamo same
@@satnamo hey his name is Peter
The only ones who should try to win anything or anyone back is others, never you. You should always be the prize no matter what and never ever let somebody else do you a favor. You must always be in the strongest position of any relationship no matter what and you should always be happy with yourself no matter if you are in a relationship or not. To remain independent and self-reliant is most important. Never become a slave to anything or anyone but always improve your character and strength by taking upon new challenges.
"It's difficult to find happiness within oneself, but impossible to find it anywhere else."
-Arthur Schopenhauer
❤
IT ALWAYS COMES FROM WITH IN. ALWAYS.
If it is difficult to find happiness within then you can have happiness anywhere else
@@nicolajames5037 true happiness is not derived from instant gratification. everything outside yourself has the potential to give you instant gratification, but happiness found within yourself is long-lasting and eternal.
I see letting go as the 4 seasons of life...each season its in a way integrated to one another...
When a leaf falls
It's literally detach from its branch
The wind
Sun
Water
Earth/ dirt will take care of the flow
The cycle to convert that deaf leave in to a new
Beautiful one....again...
Don’t fight the unavoidable. Even though it hurts. I hope everyone a peaceful heart.
so true!! and beautiful!! thank you!!! :)
Some tips? Coz your statement is not enough
@@donkelvin132 allow change to happen
Excited to doing it makes me selfish?
988889999!9¥£
*"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."*
- Lao Tzu
Seems like Taoism is what western society would call a slave mentality. Just embrace the chains of your own enslavement, don't resist your own bondage, just go along with it.
This is something I have been struggling with a few yrs.
Afraid, I'll lose parts of me I don't want to. But I'm also afraid of staying like I am now with all the crappy events that I react to, instead of stepping back & using common sense & logic. I could go on. Thank you posted the quote, got me thinking.
@@norselore3091 it is clear that someone decided to comment before watching the vid
@@norselore3091 its other way around
@@jaysmith571 lol Shrek love. I forgot about that
It wasn't the breakup itself, it's the loneliness that came with it
Yeah the lack of companionship
This is so true
This, i struggle with this alot. I've always had difficult time to feel not alone, even if i am surrounded by my friends or other people, i still feel alone. It just got a lot worse when my now ex GF left me, while saying she enjoys someone elses company a lot. Broke me in so many ways and i am now slowly healing and coming into the terms of what i've lost with her.
@@Tatuzka hey it’s the worse pain in life when your girl leaves you. I know I’m going through it. Just build yourself back up. I recommend coach Lee and coach Craig Kenneth on TH-cam. They help if you want to get your ex back or just help with moving on
@@Idontknowhoiamanymore Thanks a lot for the supportive words and the recommendation. Even though I miss her more than anything else, I think trying to get her back would not be a good idea. She left for whatever reason and I was not good enough for her, so I think I'll try to move and hopefully one day meet someone who values me the way I am.
“Those who do not understand true pain can never understand true peace.”
True
Deep!!!
Quoting naruto philosophy- respect ✊ lol
Nagato
"Know pain" - Yahiko
"He who sits alone, sleeps alone, and walks alone, who is strenuous and subdues himself, will find delight in the solitude of the forest."
That’s what I need to do…
Where is this from
@@Undesignedd Buddha, Dhammapada
@@PotofTreasureExplained thank you
I love that, thank you.
"Not everything becomes something beautiful and long-lasting. Sometimes people come into your life to show you what is right and what is wrong, to show you who you can be, to teach you to love yourself, to make you feel better for a little while, or just be someone to walk with at night and spill your life to. Not everyone is going to stay forever, and we still have to keep on going and thank them for what they've given us." -Emery Allen
Very well said. 🙂
Sad but true
Ooo I love this ❤
Thank you for that. Just perfect for something I need to say to someone.
Thank u❤
"Let the dead leaves drop" - Rumi
Wonderful quote, thank you.
Rumi 💜
drop...so that it can becomes fertiliser for new garden to exist with its broken pieces spread by the wind to next destinations. Just reading this sentence make me touch Mr.Rumi love for LOVE in everything with pleasure. What a beautitful man.
i like the idea my ex is a dead leaf, i should let it go
@@AsWPT He is a dead life in the tree that is your life. He is gone and for better or worse the past with him will fertilize your tree but there's no putting that leaf back up your branches.
To the people reading this, if someone doesn't see your worth and value then you are to good for them, it may hurt badly but there will be out there that person who wants and appreciates you, you are just yet to meet them. Heartbreak is a painful journey and can be so exhausting every day but you will be ok and the pain you are going through you are not alone, I'm with you in this pain, so when you feel alone with your heartbreak just remember I'm out there feeling it too and I'm rooting for us both to see better days. Love and Well wishes to you 💗💗
Not always the case. I walked away from a relationship and I was/am madly in love with the girl.
I totally get it. It's damn hard to do. Got a friend. She is like a little sister to me. Saw her through a terrible abusive relationship. We were really close before all of this. Was never trying to date her or anything. But that piece of shit did the damage before he left. The lies, disregard and being stolen from. He made her do it all. Terrible situation. We were close. I got mad at her at times forgetting who the victim was. She finally left him for good after he gave her a solid beating. But it was her second abuser. This guy was worse than the first one. I can tell she is trying to move on. Rebuild things. But at the end of the day she just can't trust anyone other then her brother now. I know I when I got mad at her over that stuff. Even though I did so many things right as well. She just will never be able to see me as the trusted loyal friend again. When he made her steal from Me. I lost my shit and he got what he wanted. I know on some level she will never forgive me for walking away. I know her and the children will be safe which is what I always cared about. But I'm trying to accept we are never truly gona be the friends we were. It's clear now the best she will ever be able to offer is a broken promise to reconnect. It's damn sad,
I wanne cry, you touched me. Thank youu
We got this!! For we are yet to became our true, most authentic self that will radiate love, compassion and light! ❤
@@thomasvontom u mean ? She stole something from you ? I'm so sorry for that. Hope u and her will get connect back. U may try to forgive and give her chance to change.. but also u need to tell her what do you need or like or don't. U must make it clear . And u have to clear your both mind to accept the fate and truths. People change. If her's brain damage bcoz of her past, just pray to God for her to get well back and realize what is the value of a relationship. Maybe u should try. I'm also in a bad situation now .. my crush make it obvious that she is not into me.. feel sad but sometimes I whisper to myself.. I don't have to take it personal.. I learn to not give a fuck. That's why I'm here to chill and to train my heart to let go .. I feel u bro.. the lost. At least we try. Damn, my grammar. Sorry
@@azizulhakimibrahim3367 actually things have been getting a lot better. We talked about the past. Hey man hopefully you can find a way to the end of your road as well. Also it,wasn't that I hadn't forgiven her. It was a feeling of her having not forgiving me for turning my back on her. But she straight told me she forgave me and understands why things got how they were between us. We have really squared away the past since I posted a while back.
Real love wants the best for the other person.
Romantic love just wants the other person.
Trueee
Both can be true
😢❤
So called romantic love is a pursue of illusion, we not see an actual person and don't love them only our illusion.
But maybe it's love still, can be like that. Time needed to clarify this from my experience at least. If it's love that you eventually discover and love an actual person and accept them with all their pros and cons. If not - we try to change them constantly, become resentful, envious, greedy.
Nicely put 😊
Nothing in life is permanent. Everything and Everyone comes and go. Life will play out the way it will play out, NOT how you want it to. Learn to just let go!
🙏🏽
Deep
Exactly this is what every single philosopher EVER has taught us, every single motivational speaker or writer, psychiatrist etc YET Humans are creatures of Habit and taking control of our feelings and heart and Emotions, it's the few if that that study the old laws and rules of the Ancients and get it into our heads exactly what you said that we can have less pain in our lives, I'm just getting there now and I'm 44 and I have been an Occultist for 15 years studying all the texts and religions everything from the Bible to the secret teachings of all ages to the Secret Doctrine etc. It's hard to overcome out own Hearts
what about stolen life force/soul energy/kismet?
@@jackyyoyo2005 u mean other wise known as Vrill, Chi, Kundalini, and a host of other words?
@@anthonyarcanumsanctumregnu9551 Sounds like you have been on the road of personal growth. I am curious to know your thoughts on Stoicism. Please share.
"forgiving you is my gift to you, letting go is my gift to me"
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
⨣2348140799323
beautifully put ❤❤❤❤❤
My girlfriend whom i wanted to marry for 8 years just vanished one day..Her mail account deleted,facebook gone,insta deleted..I just went out to work and we were smiling that day..never had any issues or fights..And it broke me..i searched and of no use..Everyone said i am the guilty and blah blah..Used up all my savings,went low on confidence and lost myself..Till i found she married of some guy at another place and living with him..She thought he will give her happy life but she regrets it now..but after an year i stand still building myself but even more stronger than i was before...i feel the confidence oozing and it's the best thing that happened.maybe one day my heart will heal
How you feel now?
Hope you are better now
@@su2sa1li4 better, thankyou
I cant ever imagine to be in your position, you are strong.
She is so disgusting
No one stays without a reason. No one leaves without a trace.
Thank you.
@@catiscray4133 whatever you’re going through; it will come to pass. We cannot control what happens to us. We can control how we react to it.
Cover your traces. Always.
@@True38 no. Do all you do in the wide open for all to see. Keep yourself upright. Keep your hands clean. Keep your heart softened. Keep your mind clear. Keep your conscience clean
what does that mean?
*Sending healing and love to anyone who needs it, you are powerful and deserving of all beautiful things* ❤❤
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you.
Thank you ❤
💜
There is no man more dangerous than one who has healed in solitude. That man has had more conversations with himself in his mind than with anyone else. While he was at war with his own tears, he trained his mind and built a fortress. "Strength forged in solitude"
*"By letting go it all gets done."*
- Lao Tzu
Perfect harmony
HOW THO!!! i know thats the key but how?? its so hard especially for someone who is afraid of letting go
@@marcus716 i get the fear of letting go. especially if u feel guilty about it. currently in that process right now. but just ask yourself: was this actually a good person to invest my time in? was this person useful to me besides the emotional attachment they provided? even though its hard for me to let go, i answer these questions as no. so even though its hard...i know i have to do it.
“Forgiveness… is giving up all hope for a better past” ~ Buddy Wakefield
True
This quote is so good❤️
Sometimes it's not a romantic partner but a close friend you've known for decades. Sometimes the best course of action is to let them go in order for them to change for the better. That's true love.
Definitely
The true love.
How is it❤
Trust me. Time is stronger than all our emotions. And Times erases.
100%
Time erases YOU, so no confort at all.
Thank you. I was in a toxic relationship and suffered a lot of pain and hurt. I was discarded like trash. Letting go was difficult. Being discarded was a gift to allow me to reach my full potential. I worked on myself. I became more kinder, more compassionate and more confident for myself and for someone and a new relationship. I am calm, comfortable and happy. I deserve this.
Hi, get anyone you love or (SP) attracted to you. And also get your EX back coming to you begging you for a second chance through the help of Dr Steve, he helped me restore my 5 years broken relationship. Also Dr Steve always keep up with his words, I will advise you seek his help thanks.
Message him on Whatsapp
Beautiful
when we are disgarded it is not because we are trash. It is someone elses choice of which we have no control over.
How you feel now ?
Letting go and going softly with the flow of the universe is indeed the best attitude towards life. Things which are meant for us will come into our lives anyway.
Brilliantly said…
look at me, i'm the universe's garbage dump :(
@@marius________ No. I love u man. Don't worry.
Here's a little mantra I use from time to time:
Today I'll be met with a series of events , all of which are just temporary situations. So don't mind what happens;come what may; because someday this dream is going to end.
Thank you for this.
Beautiful... thank you
I'll look into this ❤️❤️
Wow this is good. thank you
As my father once told me "If you don't go forward, you won't only get stuck, you'll fall behind. The status quo does not exist"
You sure your dad is not the reincarnation of Marcus Aurelius?
I borrowed my ex, and now I have returned him. Thanks, Epictetus.
Not Seneca, but Epictetus.
🤣🤣
Lmao
I strongly believe in fighting for what you love but there is also a humbleness in knowing when to let go. Knowing when there is nothing you can do, you can't change there mind, and you're just wasting time. The pain comes when u realize it's out of your control. It already happened. It's in the past. And that's such an awful feeling. But knowing it will get better, it will pass, gives me hope. I'll trust this process, no matter how heartbreaking. I'll let them go. I'll set them free
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
✚２３４８１４０7９９３２３🇺🇸🇺🇸⏭⏭⏭
@@oluchieric4447 no thank you. I don't want them back. I'm glad they're gone it was a toxic relationship. Not meant to be
It's getting easier and easier every time. If they come back, just remember, why would it be different this time? Time heal all wounds. Kinda sad but the only one I truly miss in my 50 years on this planet is my old doberman. He was family for real. Sure, he snatched a piece of candy if he could. But he never betrayed anyone
i don't know why, but this thing touch me. Dog sure is loyal and they love unconditionally
@@riker6595 they sure are. Thanks for your kind reply 😊
mi doberman es el mejor perro que he tenido en la vida, mi mejor amigo
its been 7 months and still finding unbareable
@@riker6595 Stop feeding your dog for couple of days and see. Unconditional 😀
My heart is broken. This video helps but the pain is still there
@angel39373 thank you for your thoughtful comment. Having interactions with people like you help. I found I can trust my mom and my therapist. Everybody else doesn’t want to hear it. I appreciate your advice. Have a great day 😁
@angel39373 Aw you are so sweet. Yes I would like to talk to you when I’m feeling down thanks for keeping the door open. Now I’m curious about your situation and what you’re going through. Let me know. Haha my mom understands but my dad is like get over there’s so many pretty girls out there. So who do you talk to that helps you?
@angel39373 yes I’m a guy. What did you say to him? And don’t beat yourself. It’s probably not just what you said. The most frustrating things about breakups is ex’s rarely tell the whole truth about what they’re feeling. What’s your mental illness? And do you feel ready for a new relationship or are u using the new guy for a rebound while you’re still thinking about your ex? Ok I know that was a lot of questions. And I have more if you wanna keep talking lol best of luck to you 😆
@angel39373 ok sounds good
Life is a messed up place we just have To deal with it
Taoism and Stoicsm must be taught right from primary schools to under grad.
"If you love someone, set them free, if they don't come back, you stalk them, then, get a restraining order"
Wise Man
Don't water dead plants.
Being Single Is Extremely Underrated. I’m So Single I Changed My Bed To A Single Bed. I Got A Pillow Top Cover & Gel Foam.. Fur Blanket, New Sheets. Nobody Will Ever Be Allowed In That Sacred Space. Embrace Oneness & Give Yourself These Things Or Anything To Make Yourself Happy. Bless Yourself When You Can. It Has Been Ordained 💫
I am trying to be in content in being single I wish I could also experience the same things
@@kashishdave3085 mehngi cheeze khareed lete hai hum bhi 😂
Not even me?
@@kashishdave3085 Only reason being single is difficult is if you are not comfortable with yourself. Learn to love yourself and love what you have not needing a relationship to ‘complete’ you
I am 56 going through a divorce after a 30 year relationship and 26 years of marriage, this video really hit the spot for me today. I have spent all my life with my vision of what life would be like, growing old with her enjoying our later years together, (unfortunately she had a different idea for her future...LOL ughhh) I have been living life the wrong way with that mindset. Thank you
Wishing you a bright and happy furure.
still not too late. :)
I hope you find happiness
I hope you find peace x
keep your head up king
Some wounds never heal. No matter what you do. You can only learn to live with it.
Ugh so true
Wounds heal, scars dont
It’s good to have some scars because you live and learn
I agree
I do believe All wounds heal, i just don’t think you can heal the pain that once was there. I guess you can call those scars.
"Don't let yourself be one of other people's options, make you their priority!"
Found out my ex left me for someone else after 6 years and buying a house together... Needed this. Things happen for a reason and people are put in your lives to teach you a lesson.
Stay strong. You WILL get through this. Stronger and better. 😊
This just happened to me, 6 years, luckily no house. Unsure what to do, total despair.
It’s a part of life. After all the heartache and the extreme pain will come ease and peace if u do things the right way
Never cry for a Narcissist ✌🏼
Stay strong learn to cope by distracting yourself with things you like, and things that improve you
she was never yours, just your turn. never beg or plead, bow out gracefully. accept it and start healing
Don't try to own her and maybe she'll stay.
@@JaysonT1 oh,buddy. You don't understand them.
@@IkesPimpHand explain
@@IkesPimpHand Don't try to understand them, they understand each other and...
Yup
You only have to find the right person once... so don't settle for instability or just enough or rejection. You'll only have this journey once, so enjoy it and let go of your sadness and trust in the process.
Im young, I'm just in my early 20's, but I've already experienced many and many difficulties in life. But, the event that I struggled survive the most is the loss of the girl I loved. Definitely the most painful feeling of my life, a pain that changes you inevitably. Letting go things is the hardest thing to master in life, it requires a big change within yourself, your beliefs, your thoughts, everything.
Just going through now, what you went through 5 months ago. Any advice for someone still in the initial stages of letting go?
@@nakulyadav9287 don't isolate yourself.
If you do so, you will think and regret. For now, it's better to focus on the present instead of thinking what happened, and receiving support by family or friends is the best way to cope the pain.
@@law_9840 Sorry to bother you again but how long did it take for the pain to subside. Like the sinking feeling in the heart? If you felt that as well. Thank you for your advice. :)
@@nakulyadav9287 i think it's subjective...
For me, it lasted like 8 months nut because she kept texting me and giving me the hot-cold treatment.
The sooner you stop thinking about her, the better
@@law_9840 thank you friend, I'm 26 and you really helped me with what I'm going through :)
Love gives us smile that no can steal and it gives us pain that no one can heal.
One of the best quotes I have come across lately.
The pain comes from attachment, not love. Pure love allows total freedom of expression. Attachment has expectations.
I miss him, but I feel like if we'd try again it would eventually lead me back here, broken. Healing. Thank you. Hoping that this will lead to the person I am supposed to be and the person I am supposed to be with.
I wish you get him back soon 😘😘
@@c7quotes183 she clearly doesn't want him back
thats clearly what im going through right now. i hope i heal soon.
And someday you’ll lose that person too
I am suffering at the moment from a break up, I will not say that I was the victim, I did a lot of mistakes as well but I wanna say a quote from Nietche that gave me a lot of power to let it go... Your pain one day will give birth to your virtues, and your demons one day will become your angels. I say this now with some tears dropping off my face, let it go...say goodbye inside you and let it go, one day this pain will turn into another power, a power that will give you the fuel to move on in life.
Good luck for you
I'm suffering too.. He will get married to someone else he slowly disconnected saying I'll get attached n I m in deep pain..
beautifully said, thank you. I need to hear this. I hope you are better by now
I was in a almost 3 year relationship with what I thought to be the love of my life. The only person I needed to live life and to be happy. From one day to another, she decided to end things. She took a job in Spain, (at first it was for only a couple of months, and then we would be back together living life normally), but she decided to stay there because it made her happy and found her place in the world. Staying in a relationship with me, stopped her from focusing and channelling all her energy towards herself. It is one month later after the break up, and it is still so hard to let go. Maybe it would've been easier to deal with if she broke up with me because she didn't loved me anymore, or if she found another parter. But no. I hate the fact that we broke up because both of us are in a different state of our lives. I have nightmares everynight, I cry everyday because I cant see her, I hate that we broke up via messages. I hope things will get better. I am trying my absolut best.
Look after yourself. The basics
@@treeladder5338 will definitely do that. it´s the only thing that will make me feel better, and i am the only one responsible for my well being. thanks for your message.
Do you remember the highest version of yourself before you met her? You need to find that same overall well being again but it will be different this time because you are no longer and will never be that person again. Then and only then you will find peace and comfort being alone and able to accept the way things turned out without even thinking of it.
I wake up every morning sad.
It was important to always stay busy, never stay at home. I am aware it's considered putting distractions into your life but I've learned along the way you don't have to be in pain to let that relationship have meaning.
Man, i don't want to dis respect you and your pain. But she was clearly banging Another dude or more than one while in spain.
Sorry for your pain, i am in pain too, my love is with a rich guy and thats it.
This was the greatest lesson I ever learned in my life and it arguably saved it for many reasons. I became to attached to the one I loved. Clinging like a scared infant. But over time when I was put into states where I didn’t know what would happen tomorrow cause of something that happened today. I felt a prisoner and binding to feel. I finally realized that in order to be able to let go of her and be okay with a divorce which we unfortunately did have happen. I wasn’t this time crying and feeling a mess. I didn’t feel like I made a mistake or that my mistakes I made were unjustifiable in a fair way. I just realized life takes you where it wants you to and you have to follow it in your stride. Rather than cling to people with a fantasy/daydreaming/blinding infatuating gullible love. Fall in love with what you know would be best for that person. Because then you’ll never feel like letting them go is giving up. It’s learning to realize where your place is and what you can control.!
incredible advice
Thank you so much. Acceptance is the key, just accept and if you feel like crying it’s okay but don’t be stuck, don’t blame, it’s okay to panic, but slowly give it time. Forgive yourself.
I'm happy that person came along in my life and experience bliss. A song, fragrance still reminds me of her. Learn and move on, good thing we're not immortals that whatever pain we have will be washed away forever for sure.
Too many songs remind me of her that I can hardly bear listen to most I used to enjoy. Trying to make peace with those aching memories.
@@december12twok12 either you run away from those memories which is impossible or face it head on and that's what I did. Just hang on it'll pass and one day you'll just smile and thank your fate. Like what One year of love by Queen says. The sax player in that song is the one on careless whisper.
@@kilingkiling-tinybell Thank you.
An unripe mango will become a ripe mango and later a foul mango. In the same way, any sense pleasure will at some point become suffering if we cling to it. The suffering & pain are build into the pleasure
We need to truly accept that whatever lives dies the same way whatever that starts will end whether it be technology or a relationship
its our attention a.k.a.. focus that brings suffering.. no matter what we put our attention on. its easier in carreer or material pursuit but on people and romantic relationship? the latter is way harder without damaging them in order to bend them on our will for our happiness. We always wound the person we love because we don't know how to love..
It is so empowering, to just trust the universe that it will figure it all out for you. You just have to accept and welcome the changes and see what life has to offer you or learn you. Of course stability is good, there is less stress there, but once you master the art of letting go you will find true freedom.
I would say that this could even apply to your relationship with your past self.
No feeling is final, that's so true 👍
i just recently lost my dad at 63 and have had an absolutely horrific time dealing with it. i also lost 2 of my best friends to opioids in the last couple years, one of which i found in my basement. i really want to understand this more and embrace the inevitability of life but it is incredibly hard. this has been helpful but definitely something i will have to work on. thanks as always for the awesome content, german loner
Look up Dolores Cannon videos. They may help you with why things happened the way they did. Wishing you peace in your future. American loner :)
sorry for ur pain brother.. maybe u should listen to alan watts.. u might realize alot of things ..
Escapism, greed, high expectations, sexual urges and selfishness ruins relationships especially when someone always will love themselves more than their insignificant other. True love is simply not possible. When one person sacrifices so much for the other that they burn out while the other just takes and takes then what is the point?
No romentic relationship can be true love yes you get some of those moments but they are temporary if you need to work it out both partners need to be selfish in a healthy way if you do it too much again it will get ruin
True love is real bro
You're going after the wrong type of person. If it's a repeating pattern that you recognize it might be better to remain single. It sucks but I'm seeing that myself. There's a type I'm attracted to but it never ends well. Due to my stubborn nature I'd rather "win" and not settle, so I'll remain single instead.
A very wise person told me about this metaphor when it comes to love : true love should work like water being poured into a vase. You are the vase and true love can only come out once the vase is full. For true love to happen, you must love yourself enough first and then it will naturally spill over to people around you.
Being a candle and burning yourself out to bring temporary light around you will only end up with you being burnt out and people around you suddenly being cold and in the dark.
Practice self-love, accept yourself for who you are, take care of yourself and everything will flow naturally.
@@amicableenmity9820want to be single for a while learning to sell on amazon later want to sell it on my site. Give me ur best wishes ❤️
I had this amazing chemistry with this girl I just met. A chemistry I never felt with any other girl. The first time I met her we talked all evening and night until it was early morning. A couple of days later she invited me to her place and again we talked for hours, watched a comedy and laughed about the same jokes, played a game and were bored at the same time, listened to music and chose the same songs. We really enjoyed eachother's company and even though I just met her I felt this deep connection to her. We planned a date a couple of days later, but she ended up cancelling the day before. She had a good reason, she told me she felt bad about it, but still the uncertainty I felt kept me awake all night. I talked to a friend of mine who is usually up until late and his comments - "you should forget her, she clearly has someone else on her mind" - made me feel even more uncertain about the situation. Deprived of sleep and mentally drained I texted her the day after, trying to force things a certain way, basically craving some answer that took away my uncertainty and by doing that I immediately created a distance between us. Understandable, because nobody likes to lose control of their own life of course. Once I got some sleep and refreshed myself I was unbelievably mad at myself for not letting things flow naturally. I felt like a weakling, childish and egoistic. I left her alone for some time, determined to give her the time she needed to close that distance or give myself the time to get over her. I knew I messed up and I realized I couldn't do anything about it, so instead of focussing on her I decided to work on myself. I took a cold shower every morning, cleaned my entire house, got rid of old stuff and did other things I had been planning to do for a long time and took a long walk every evening until my feet hurt and my legs were tired. It didn't take long before I was thinking clearly again and things changed for the better. I won't tell you how the story ends, but I can tell you that I am convinced I wouldn't have gotten the same results if I had clung to her. Luckily for me I realized this fast enough and I have to thank the creators of TH-cam videos like this one. If I hadn't seen videos about letting go before I probably would have made things worse and never would have gotten to where I am now. If you have single friends who are looking for a partner do them a favor and send them these videos before they start dating someone, it can change their lives.
Cheers.
1. Have problem
2. Go with the flow
3. No problem
Life is on easy mode
Simple.
1. Have desire
2. Extinguish desire
3. Suffering gone
Vigor Luigi switched to Creative Mode
@@newuser689 4. Boredom ensues
@@lizc2023 boredom is the desire of not boredom
14 years now and just started moving on. I don't know if love will ever smile on me again, but I don't think I will be that much attached if it does.
Wow bro, you really loved very deep. Unfortunately ppl change on us and hurt us. But I hope you will find love, but be more mindful of how life is
It'll get better.
Happen to me too bro
Sadly it feels like Im at the start of a very similar journey..my wife ended it after 25 years out the blue..5 weeks and the pain is as intense..we didnt argue or bicker..i worshipped her..dont know how im going to cope..the wound is so deep :(
@@dangerscouser i dont know what it feels like, but hold on man.
*Most relationships* :
"I don't want you to do the things you want to do, and if you do those things, then I will be unhappy and do my best to make you feel guilty for being yourself.
I want you be less like yourself and more like the ideal of a partner I have painted in my head.
Everytime you fail to do so, I will be angry and blame and shame you. I will not appreciate what you have done for me,
but rather focus on what is clearly only wrong with you and what you need to change about yourself in order to please me and give me satisfaction.
You, other human, owe me that!"
*actual love* :
"You can do whatever you want to do and be who you are, since I love you and want nothing but the best for you, even if that means your path isn't the same as mine."
I wish everyone in the world could read this because this is why I broke up with my ex after over 2 years but I couldn’t put it into words
"You can do whatever you want to do and be who you are, since I love you and want nothing but the best for you, even if that means your path isn't the same as mine."
Sounds good - doesn't work.
Now imagine a women who falls in love with a terrorist, should she not try to change his direction or for sake of love wishes he bombs the heck of out of America so he can be himself?
Love is much more complicated then this.
When we like somebody we ignore the things that we don't like, and when the liking ends, those things become visible to us again.
That sounds nice and all until one of the partners is a dangerous (narcissist, sociopath, psychopath) person.
The other partner will then have to go through a journey of self love and protect themselves by letting them go.
@@bri3449 !!!
Bold of you to assume I have anyone in my life(at all) to even let go.
Bold of you to assume this was directed to you
You are beautiful, strong ,worthy and valuable. Don't let anyone convince you otherwise or tell you any different !!
Letting go all of ,my friends was the best thing ever had happened to me.🙂💕
30 years gone just like that, I have this on loop until I get it in my mind and heart Thank you for this video you produced! I do believe this is the definition of love, helping someone in pain that just can't understand why. I'm grateful Thank you.
"letting things take their natural course." Letting go also creates space for the aligned ones to flow in....remember someone told me that people came to your life for a reason or for a season...we all have our own journey..try to see the blessing in disguise.❤️❤️
I found out recently My wife was sleeping with his boy friend and got pregnant while sleeping next to me ! I am still in trauma and depression. Since the beginning of marriage she was physically and mentally abusive but i tried really hard to solve it and thought one day everything will be fine but unfortunately couldn’t and finally i got this traumatic experience. I am trying to keep myself strong ! I hope i can heal from this one day!
Becoming familiar with pain being the root of empathy. That makes a lot of sense. I’ve been more accepting of the way things are lately. I think I’m doing so a lot of answers for what I would like to change have been more apparent. I’m no longer wasting energy wishing for something different. Loss still hurts but in a lot of ways I’m finding a lot of those things aren’t compatible with the person I’m becoming and that’s ok. That life does course correct as long as you don’t give up on yourself.
Give the gift of your absence to those who do not appreciate your presence
He don't care
THAT is simple but powerful
I am very grateful to have friends through this. Their support has been a great help. I’m the type of person who doesn’t like having more than one friend but you need other people. I am making a big effort to try to make more friends because it really can make the whole difference.
This was very peaceful to watch, gave a little ease to my aching heart. I wish everyone healing and the ability to be flexible and go with life's changes the smoothest way possible.
Sometimes we fight for something when there is no battle to fight.
We spend so much time and invest so much of ourselves to find and hold on to what makes us feel good when we realize we are all we need to feel good we can be happy forever ❤
I was married to a narcissist for 15 years I didn't even know what narcissist was at the time of the divorce I was out of it mentally and emotionally but know 10 years later i am so glad she ripped my heart out!!!!! Its crazy how I was living a life that I hated but at least one awesome thing came from it my son!!!
Dude you're almost at 1 mill I remember when you were like at 10 thousand proud of you thank you for the videos
Thank you... I've been going through another failed (potential) relationship. Their decisions are not within my control and there's nothing I can do but accepting and honoring their decisions.
I finally gave them the permission to exit my life peacefully, just like how they entered it.
I know of a man who could help you restore back your relationship either your ex or soulmate
He was the one who helped me in restoring back my ex partner three days ago without delay
Whtsaap him"**
±2348140799323⏭⏭💕💕
those hurt the most because potential will always leave you wondering rather than experiencing it and realizing it’s flaws. i had difficulties with this just stay strong and practice self love
"Accept it until it naturally subside"
I've already learned this 🙂
It’s the comments for me. You people are freaking amazing.
Last week I finally cut it off with my boyfriend. We were not particually long together, but there were major red flags that I tried to oversee. It took me 5 times to let it go, and it has been really hard.
People, don't settle for people who makes you feel like shit or that you are not enough, even if loneliness sometimes hurt.
You deserve better.
Love yourself.
Sorry to hear this news, bit late but, what did they do to make you not feel like you are not enough? :o
I can't thank the universe enough, for this is what I just needed. Thanks again.
I have to let go of men who weren’t interested in me to begin with. I cant even get to the relationship stage.
I recently spent time with someone who didn't reciprocate my feelings. They didn't do anything wrong, but I felt unappreciated. As a result, I chose to move on and prioritize myself. Now, I feel better and have stopped worrying about that person.
Letting go has been one of the hardest lessons for me so far in life. But because of Taoist teachings, lots of prayer and meditation, I’m finally making progress. I’m learning that every event in life has something to offer; A lesson, or opportunity, or something… You might not ever know for certain. So much of our suffering is caused by how we react to a experience, and not always the experience itself.
We were together for 9 yrs and he cheated on me on 26th Feb and I was devastated. This channel helps me to move forward
You’ll be ok ❤ - they are unable to truly love - value your love and separate your attachment- seek Jesus read
I ruined my life by getting involved with a girl who used me to get over an ex. She put all her time and energy into me to distract herself for a few months. Once she was over the other she dropped me. No consideration for how it affected my life. Now she wants to be friends, but I adapted my life to be in the relationship.
You didn't come into life with an instruction book, so you didnt know that this could be a possibility. But it is. What are you going to do about it? Are you going to stay angry at someone who unwisely got into another relationship quickly after their previous had ended? It was simply a mistake on your part and on theirs. A very easy one to make, by the way. It's your job to make yourself happy - no-one elses. As soon as you can, just start building positive memories in your life, and if you meet someone else you like, take your time, and get to know them as friends, and let things evolve. Just remember thay someone who isnt happy on their own can't be happy with someone else. They should want be be with you be with you.
Well, that is just human nature. Self-interest. Nobody cares unless you apply to their self-interest and people are quick to leave you once you fall and come back like rats when you're on the top. So get yours and fuck everybody else.
😭
The exact same thing happened to me.
What upsets me the most is not that I was her rebound...fine that happens.
But that she wanst honest from the beginning, I had no idea that she was hurt until I was already in love.
Hell, maybe I would've done the same things, and made the same decisions even if had told me...but it would've been my decision!
Hi 4 months on and things got better. I still chat to her and she has a habit of coming back to me when things are not going well for her. But I’ve dealt with it and can see she tries to rekindle my interest in her as an ego trip but I’m over it now
People do to you what you allow them to do you.
Correct. This is where boundaries and self-respect come into play.
Doesn't work everytime
This may be true. However, many of us have been conditioned since birth to be used and abused. When you find yourself in one abusive relationship after another, either personal relationships or work relationships, it is probably because you were raised by narcissists. If this is the case, you must learn to set boundaries and to avoid those types of people.
@@JohnOliver100 this is precisely how I learned about boundaries- through abuse and neglect which brought me into counseling. It's a never-ending learning experience for me but I've come a long way.
@@somerwestberg7584 - Similar experience here. I just let someone go after I thought, when I hadn't seen them for years, they would have grown, but alas, they repeated an old pattern and I didn't hesitate to let them go. It hurts because their behaviour is an insult, but they won't learn to be more respectful (they have narcissistic tendancies), and I cannot be anyone's emotional punching bag. I'd rather be alone.
Been in a 6year relationship. In that course of time, I was always the one who was being put aside when he’s on to something, whether it be with friends, acquaintances, or other stuff. Didn’t even introduced me to his family and friends. He would rarely listen to me. When I told him about his shortcomings, which happened a lot of time during the 6yrs, he would say he feels guilty by doing so and that he’ll just breakup with me. In other words, he valued me lesser than other stuff in his life. But I stayed in the hope of changes. It didn’t happen. He broke up with me 2 months ago and this time I am accepting it. It’s hard but I have to keep moving for my welfare.
@@user-sw3ch8xn7g nah! Cheating can’t be justified in anyway. You have your lapses but she could’ve let you go before jumping into another affair.
@@user-sw3ch8xn7g cheers to our healing!
As a person going through a painful break up I would like to thank you 🙏
It's funny how so many of your videos lately have been so eerily relevant to my situation. I guess it's one way that life smiles at me and guides me towards my destiny.
Here synchronisticily after break up, that's what I needed to hear
There was a time when I believed in everlasting love, but now I accept that all relationships will sooner or later turn to shite.
Nothing is certain, just love while you get the chance.
Love and happiness come from within... No one can give it or take it away.. ∞
I've been abandoned so many times, it doesn't even hurt anymore.
Same
As much as I admire Taoism, I feel some people will use it as an excuse to breakup and to give following cold shoulder. I know someone who likes it and yeah, he would excuse his coldness using this. While Taoism might not be a proper religion, I feel that people who are religious or closely follow a creed will often use elements of said religion as a cover for their own decisions.
If breaking up is the right choice for them to make them happy, hopefully they don't need any external excuses
Excuse? People don't need excuses. They will do what they want, so let them go.
I agree, they excuse bad behavior under the guise of God love's me, I only need God's forgiveness blah blah blah
If the guy will use Taoism as an excuse, and then become cold, and you have a problem with that, then maybe it’s you that doesn’t approve of him.
What their decisions are, is their existence, if indeed it is a conscious effort. Your existence does not hang on a ‘feeling’ generated by ‘someone’ else. Find comfort in your ‘feeling’ alone and comfort in that moment, and then that next moment…..
It's not easy as it sounds. I'm trying so hard to let go, even if the person is bad for me. 😪
Take care of yourself my friend.
How are you doing now bro?
Yea how are you now?
Same😥
@@merrieromelie Walk and cry while looking in the sky. It will help to ease the pain.
I had toxic relationship which had many, many breakups in it, and I was miserable. I lost 13 years of my life on trying to make it work. I am really lost now, suddenly alone at this age. I needed this video.
I can relate, I was in a toxic relationship and always put down then I started reflecting the same energy I recieved into them. I was trying my best but it was never good enough, always put down for not being a real man because I did not argue or want to fight over petty things. I would want space but never got it, they were always there just controlling me and my emotions and feelings. I ignored the red flags in the start. but I became the redflags in the end because I was stuck in a relationship that was moving too fast, she bought a house for us to live in and she bought holidays for us to go on. She was nearly 5 years older than me and everyone used to say that we looked related like far distance family memebers. It was like I was tied down to her eventhough I did not want to be because the relationship was not healthy. We were just two different at different stages of our lives, I wish we met when things alined better for us. We did have some common grounds, both had OCD and both like shushi and both enjoyed going on random adventures. Her step father and mother both have an unhealthy relationship. She acts like the man when she doesnt need too just because she is a high earner. She treats everyone like shit at times and expects everyone to bow to her command.I was told by my sibblings that I was like her lap dog and she respected me alot, which hurt me alot deep down. Her mother used to cry to me and say that she was glad that I came over cause whenever I came over she would have calmed down and be nice to her and her partner. Like her personality would switch, her mother even said that her son felt cause of her. The girls brother ran off, because of the way he was treated by her and he left with his girl friend, who he later married and now has kids with. In that house there was no other male figure in charge, just this girl that I was in a relationship with. She was the one that called the shots and told people what to do. She ran the whole like she was the head of the household. She had an ex husband who was mental but I am convinced after living with her, she mad him mental. So just assumed the role of the head of her house hold.
She came out of a divorce and met me, alot of the time I felt like the rebound guy, the guy that just helped her get over the divorce but she never resloved her own truma or issues from her past and upbringing. I only stayed not because I wanted to but because she would cry and get upset and I stayed cause I felt bad overtime that turned into resentment against her. I did like being with her but without healthy space and other hobbies interests outside the relationship it just felt like I was stuck, I was not myself anymore. I lost sight of what I wanted in life just to settle down with a women, that frankly was old, overweight, unhappy, excessive health issues along side mental health issues. She did have money but other than that what did she have no much. Before I met her I did try to manfesit a sugar mama and I found one in her in a weird kinda way. She would pay for nearly everything when we would out and if I wanted something she would pay for it.
Our relationship was weird almost like a mother and son relationship. She gave me what my mother did not, hence I was attached to her more because she was supportive with my OCD and understanding, compassionate in a way. It was like a mother that I never had. She was a teacher/skills coach, in my past relationships I have been with women from similar background. She would control how I would do things from time to time and sometimes let me lead but then complain about how she wanted a man. I never understood this, it baffles me cause women want a man but they do not want to submit to one yet complain when they have one. People all these women, "Alpha women".
We did have some good moments and times together, we used to go out eating at different places. We vibed together went different places for shisha and food. We used enjoy eating alot. It was like we bonded over time and it was good for a short while but then problems slowly creeped in. She would get insecure not let me go out to the gym and wanted to tag along everywhere I went. She would get annoyed that I changed my phone pass and she would want to check my dms and whatspp messages. She would get angry if I spend time with my family over her and moments when she was left home alone whilst my sister and mother were home alone. She would expect me to chose her cause to her thats what a real a man does? A real man would leaving everything for the women he was with, according to her. Abandon his own family, friends and goals and dreams. I felt empty in the relationship at time because it was just surface level. We never had deep talks of discussions about things it was just about working, getting a better job and eating thats it really. I used to get belittled at times for the way, I was or the jokes I made. I was me to an extent but scared that I could not truly open up to her. I feared being judged for me, at times and in a relationship that is the worst feeling ever, you feel so weak and venerbale.
We never had deep talks or talked about life on a deeper level. We only ever talked about getting married and having kids, living together. I mean thats all she talked about and thats all that matter to her. It did not matter about my goals and dreams, me as a person what I wanted to achieve. I am younger but that does not meant that did not have high ambition or drive to be more and better. But there was a feeling that we were brought together for a reason, maybe a lesson for each other.
Then one night we had an agrument, granted I was in the wrong for talking to an ex over the phone. The dumb ex kept calling me constantly and was just harrsing me to the point, I foolisly picked up. The phone converstaion was over heard by the mother and automatically they assumed I was cheating. I was labeled a cheat and that was not right. I told her there was nothing that happended, she did not believe me. she kept hounded in me until I threatned to leave then she changed her tune and was nice to me, said lets go get something to eat? Also cause I was nice to her after a long time by letting her wear my watch, she thought I was cheating again. I just felt this rage of anger and consumed by her negtivity, I told her a few times to leave me alone give me some space. I could handle the constant verbal shouting/abuse towards me. These things happened before, in the past in our relationship. But today I just had enough. I just packed my things and ran off. I still remeber she tried to enter my car whilst I was outside her house and I said that she was nuts then drove off. she called me a few times and back forth shouting on the phone. Then I text her that I found her unttractive and that the holiday was a mistake, only too push her away thats it really. Then I drove home and stayed for a few days, I thought come weekend things would blow over but they really didnt we met again, we talked I apologized for things I said. I thought maybe there was a chance at changing our relationship for the better, maybe she would respect me as a man but she didnt. cause straight away she started talking about how she is seeing other another guy, which turned out be a lie. Thats what got to me and the fact I gave her my emotional energy and time yet she threw it back into my face again. We both cried cause deep down both of us where hurting, it is hard to let go. We still deicded to see where things would go for us.
We spoke back and forth then spend time together. We just connected and everything became in the past when we were together. I dont know if this was because she wanted me to stay or if our feelings were real.
I posted a video from Piers Morgan about ex and going back. she saw it on my status and straight away said that maybe we are not meant to be togther. I agreed and on that stopped talking to her cause I warned her when I last met her after the intial break up that no need to go back and forth. Then she again she kept messaging me saying take care of your family and things. I did not respond. Then she messaged me again asking about this thursday to see one of my friends. Again I did not respond. She got angery and said if you are going to ignore me then leave. Then she messaged saying delete my number, which I already did. She messaged her pitty little goodbyes but I still did not responed to her. I did not respond out of respect as a man for myself and feelings, she was toying with my emotions because she thought I would constantly run back to her.
I do not know what will happend but I attract and not chase, whatever is mine will simply find me. I pray that if she is my true soulmate then she will come back changed, like a different person but people rarely change from the instance you met them..
Glad I found this. I need support regarding letting someone go. She used to be attracted to me but I wasn’t to her initially. Over time, she lost her attraction to me but I’ve become attracted to her. As a result, I need to let her go and get used to it as hard as it feels. 😰
Everything about this video is perfect. The pictures,the text ,music and timing were all spot on. Although it deals with letting go and its accompaniments like rejection,loss,grief; the overall feeling I 've got was peace. Thank you Einzelgänger.
The person I'm trying to get over has exactly the same first name as yours lol... seeing it here made me take a sudden deep breath!
Just ended an 8 year relationship. Moving on has been the hardest part. Hearing this has helped me, thank you.
This has also peaked my interest in Taoism.
I recently ended an 6-year relationship. The hardest part of ending is starting again. Can't deny it hurts. When it hurts, just know there is me who also is hurting like you.
Me too gentlemen
we are here all together. better days are coming my brothers
This was so helpful, since I was & am in the stubbornness of not wanting to let go of the person and so hope 🙏 now I will meditate on this and going to accept
Lost my first love, the most beautiful soul i have ever met. Losing her was the hardest thing i have ever faced. She is my home, my best friend, the only one who met the real me. She is such a good girl. Even if i let go, i will always pray for my beautiful girl
Letting go becomes difficult when there's a child involved. I want to let go of this person but he's still the father of my child and my child still holds space for him in our home. There are still things that belong to him here that I want to pack up and give back to him or just put away, out of sight, but making that drastic of a change will affect my son. He's so young and still holds on to the idea of mama and dada together.
Same here, 2 sons, 15 years invested, she got full custody and is being evil towards me. The pain of loss is overwhelming and I just want to die....7 weeks now
this concept is eerily applicable to my life right now. Thanks!