By removing dislikes, youtube has rendered likes meaningless. To make them relevant again, use this comment to show any dislikes you have. Just hit the thumbs up, and let's keep the channel transparent.
Yeah I’m not sure we can replace dislikes this way. Too many people just click it just to click it. It might be an inaccurate count in the future, but at least some people will have a way to show their criticism of the video I suppose.
if people want to see dislikes there's a few chrome extensions that are able to do that as of now, but this is also a good way to kind of show interest in the video although a little flawed.
I can’t stop laughing at the fact that every character seems to have some kind of weird name and be from a similarly weird-named fantasy land, and then there’s just “Angelica from Iceland”.
@@TravisBroski COMPLETELY off topic, but whenever the 'public accountant etc' came up it made me think of another book, "The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant", far superior in every way its a series about a vampire whose most interesting trait is he is an accountant because none of the other vampires know how to do their taxes
The part where her dad falls seven storeys but is fine because he tucks into a roll then impales his face on a sword taking a bow which causes him to lose an eye had me HOWLING
Anyone else find it kind of disturbing that Tyra describing a character that isn’t a perfect 10 makes them sound like an eldritch horror badly pretending to be human?
@@FIRSTNAMELASTNAME-zt4kf works in the setting that the author also made up, thereby giving an excuse to body shame and superficially attack people she describes in her book- young girls, no less- in her YA novel. It’s extremely uncomfortable and damaging
There's a game called Love Nikki, which seems to be a cute dress up game where you fight wars with fashion. It does the 'world' of fashion' perfectly. It turns out that everyone is cursed to die if they act violent, so wars are fought with fashion shows and every piece of clothing has magic that grows more powerful if correctly combined into a theme. People will fall down exhausted if their outfit is outshone by an opponent. People steal designs and accessories, entire towns are held hostage for fabric. There's a piece of lore text describing a designer being held hostage and starved to force her to work. Your best friend was orphaned over a suitcase full of dress instructions. You fight a city of vampires by finding the right outfit to ward them off. Don't bother playing it, most of the content is seasonal.
I know this is an old comment but Nikki is coming out with a AAA game for consoles in the same universe! You can hold out for that and I'm sure it'll encompass all of the above and more. I'm excited for it
Wait, do you know which text describes the designer being held to work? Also, lmao it seems the story has been getting a little more violent lately, but I haven't really played in a while, so idk
@@taylorslade8080I stopped playing when Nikki died and the story stopped making sense because it dropped that story and did like a soft reset? I kind of want to go over the story again now though to see if they fixed it
I’m just going to say it: Tyra should shift over to writing surreal creepypasta/no sleep stories. She clearly likes writing about weird creatures and she could do it with enough practice.
Ah, I've heard of this book through a former classmate. She described it to me as "the mental breakdown of the supermodel known as Tyra Banks...in literary form".
@@macdonaldsmilkjug5022 It's even weirder than that. Watch the last segment of Jenny Nicholson's review video on Trigger Warning for more of the backstory.
@@Wired_User Haha, I'm just swell. I'm now a single father cause a different ex found out she'd rather fuck a bunch of ugly people than to raise our son.
I really wish people would look up the metric system before using it in their writing. Because the protag's facial dimensions are genuinely horrifying - she basically has a Joker smile and eyes on her temples
It’s entirely intentional yet is also weirdly played straight? There are parts where I didn’t fully know if Tyra is positive or negative about her own modelling experience. But having been an ANTM viewer in my youth (like many young gay men like myself) I know that’s how Tyra actually is. She seems to praise modelling as a wonderful career that opens opportunities, yet also a shallow and misogynistic world that focuses on narrow beauty norms. It’s really quite bizarre.
@@hkazu63 that's not so strange if you think about it. It's really difficult to talk or feel negatively about things that implicate yourself and the people you love. It's difficult to acknowledge that what happened to you was wrong when you want to forgive and move past it with little fuss. It's difficult to talk negatively about what made your current life possible, especially in the public eye. People would call her a hypocrite, and ungrateful, and fake, and a liar. People would say she's just bitter now that she's older and not in the spotlight of the youth obsessed model and beauty industry. Everyday people, especially fans, feel angry and hurt when someone comes out that they didn't like or want to do whatever it is the person loved them for doing because people don't like feeling like they've done something wrong, and people also feel very strongly that if you don't intentionally do something wrong then it becomes not wrong which is a symptom of hating feeling like they've done wrong. (Not that enjoying media where there's no indication that the people involved in creating it are unhappy to do so is wrong, but people are concerned with how they feel about things more than what needs addressing).
Hypothetically If they way they lost their periods made them sterile it would mean that modelland would only be able to draw new models from the outside world who would steadily produce worse models as the traits that produce good models would be slowly breed out of the general population like some bizarre reversal of eugenics
It is actually a form of eugenics. Except, instead of turning the population into a supposedly idealized version of humanity, it makes them consistently worse
That might actually explain the character's weird proportions. Centuries of pretty people being eliminated from the gene pool have led to everyone alive being horribly deformed and not even realizing it.
“Rule number 1: don’t use semicolons” Rule number 1.5: use semicolons after having properly researched how they work; skipping them altogether is just a waste
*”WHEN MY MOTHER YELLS AT ME LIKE THIS IT’S BECAUSE SHE LOVES ME!!”* That actually explains a few things. I wonder how often her mother yelled at her like that growing up.
And she was yelling at the model for laughing off someone else's rude comment, because she had been IN ANGER MANAGEMENT THERAPY AND WAS SINCERELY TRYING TO IMPROVE HOW SHE DEALT WITH CONFLICT But Tyra expected her to be the villain and had a whole bit ready, and now oops everyone only remembers Tyra because she went ahead with her Reason You Suck speech when it didn't fit
@@savannahm9943 with a vernacular that includes “jocular” I’d imagine that you’d be used to doing a little bit of reading and digging up information on your own, considering that’s not a word lazy people know or use.
I feel like Tyra missed her calling her calling as a body horror author. There's a very good foundation for some of the weird horrific stuff that happens, like the mirrors distorting you and the legizards and whatnot. Or maybe she'd just make for a great Nechronica GM, I could see it. I might use some of this, actually.
@@monitaroy7462 Hello, fellow Nechromancer! Are you taking Tyra’s ideas for an ongoing or future campaign? I’m on the off-season for Nech currently, hoping to start again come Feb/March.
@@legateelizabeth I'm currently running a campaign for my tabletop friends, and I am indeed thinking of taking some ideas from here. First order of business, probably, is statting up some monsters :P
I don't think she missed her calling as a body horror author, I think decades of her and the world focusing purely on her body warped her perceptions until she had gone through every fear related to body image, and can now relate that to other people. It's very tied to her career.
This book is essentially Tyra Banks’ Sonichu. It’s an unhinged narrative that can only truly be understood by looking into the authors other insane projects, and it’s sole purpose seems to be to inflate the authors already massive ego.
Honestly the "sense next year's fashion" and "make people want to buy things" would be extremely good super powers. Set up a shop somewhere good, stock up on next year's most trending outfits, put the best ones up on display to attract window shoppers, then make them want to buy the clothes. The plan would be even more effective since this is a place obsessed with fashion. Bam, you're rich.
The next trend sense isn't that great. Trends move in a general twenty-year cycle. That's why things from y2k are trending now, all that's changed is we took the most salvageable parts and fit them into a rosetinted modern view of that era. Examples of trends that came back: • Chunky resin(?) rings • Baguette bag • Bucket hats Didn't come back: •dresses with jeans •skinny scarf •the weird circular belt Things that will be coming back: •Ballet Flats •Ballet core in general (especially younger version) Edit: format ugly + extra examples
I don't think Tyra Banks planned her story or her world entirely, but wrote a big chunk of the book just on her loose ideas, forgot some of what she wrote in the beginning, then read it when she was nearing the end and realized she hadn't used many of her first ideas and characters and therefore crammed them in way too late. It could be the reason why it is so strangely chopped up as well.
its trying to be harry potter while hiding that fact, you will notice that almost all the odd things that happen have a one to one correlation to something in that series, the teleporting being the most obvious
@@jo_helaci just a fun fact I've learned on this they had to cut 500-1,000 pages out of the manuscript before it was approved for printing. I only know this as Allison Pregler did a full reading of the book with some fun snippets of research.
You know what, that'd make perfect sense. It already reads like a bad fanfic, so the "I hate this person so they are the comically bad guy in my story" trope is a given.
I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING like the entire dynamic reminded me of that one episode of tyra where naomi campbell was the guest and tyra just seemed like she was projecting her insecurities on naomi the entire episode
as someone with a really basic understanding of french, its hillarious how many times tyra banks just uses the plain-ass french word for something to make it seem ~magical and fantastical~
As someone who’s entire education has been in french and who has french relatives, the girl named walk walk made me laugh way too hard. I feel like French works in the same way a joke or a horror movie does. It’s mystical/funny/terrifying until you take out the insides to see how it works.
I speak Polish and whenever a more ambitious movie director uses it to create a more spooky and mysterious atmosphere I cringe a little bit. I know what they want viewers to feel but it's difficult to take it seriously when you recognize that the VA is either not Polish or is raised in USA. It ruins the suspense when you imagine that the author of the spooky voice is most likely an extra or intern living in suburbs or something like that For similar reasons it's also strange to hear German language spoken by obvious non-Germans. I guess learning languages spoils the fun a little bit
this book could almost serve as an allegory for just how absurdly warped and messed up what people will do to make themselves "pretty" in the real world. I feel Tyra unironically gave just the perfect ammo for people to re work this into a complete horror story of sacrificing your basic biological functions and normal life for the sake of getting attention. She actually made it easier to turn this into a horror story than Norman did for Empress Theresa. I'm almost floored by that
Omg certain sections of this are so warped. There’s a whole “Bulimia takes your ability to menstruate away” section covered up by a class on “saving face” Jesus Tyra had no idea how deep her psyche is scarred
I pointed this out as a reply somewhere else but just the fixation on beauty in this story is extremely obvious and a worrying look into Banks' worldview. This just makes it worse.
@@unexpected2475 it’s the fact that I watched her show. While listing to this book breakdown I can hear her book hit every single emotional wave that corresponds to the commercial breaks. This is book is a blueprint to every episode of her show, and the high level of emotional trauma from adolescence that went into every single contestant. This shit is mortifying 🙈
We need to make the KrimsonRogue bad book multiverse a thing. I wanna see Daniel, Zade, and Empress Teresa fight to the death in the battle of the overpowered idiots!
Empress Teresa gives praises to God, but it doesn’t matter because Daniel hacked the universe and killed him after having underaged sex with his brainwashed girlfriend. Zade narrated about how the fight goes before showing how the fight goes. Empress Teresa then turns the entire world over, dooming the entire planet, but Daniel stops this by torturing other people even more.
And Alessia and Bella Swan spectating from the side talking about how they can't get their man and aren't worthy of him. Also Wade would totally join the fight, but he's too busy being addicted to the Oni and reminding people he got laid.
The thing is, this book's setting is _kinda_ interesting. The problem is, it feels like it's being explored wrong; it's the worldbuilding equivalent going to France for the weekend, only to enter one supermarket on the first day, stand several feet from Mont Saint Michel for a quarter of an hour, then spend the rest of your time in your hotel room. Like, where the hell are the Legizards from? Are they genetically-modified humans? Is this book set in the Cruelty Squad universe?
On further thought, the parallels to Cruelty Squad make a lot of sense. That game is about the commodification of human bodies, among other things, and what is the modelling industry other than the commodification of bodies? In both cases, a life has no value but a body... a body is everything.
The fact that the country is called "Mytopia" (is that how it's spelled? I have no idea) is utterly hilarious to me considering the plot of this book is about as sane as the average Miitopia playthrough.
A plot thread of my miitopia play through: Prince Edgeworth tries to marry Princess Bayonetta, but she falls for Zac Efron instead. Enraged, he summons the evil genie Will Smith, but he abandons him instead. Sounds about right.
Oh God, the menstruation stuff had me literally screaming in horror! Look, I don't like periods as much as anyone, but the idea of some outside institution having full control over them is nightmarishly disturbing to me... Not even *I* get a say in those, why should you??
Right? I don't like my period but I have a huge fear of falling and would rather go *skydiving* than let someone other than myself have control of it. Fucking terrifying notion.
@@Kuraiko-nn4cl It can make conception harder. Not impossible, but harder because there's dead eggs left in the ovaries. I'm not sure about anything else though.
Sometimes while reading The Hunger Games I think, wouldn't it be amazing to get a massive info dump on what life in the Capitol is like? And I think this book is the answer to that
When I was listening along to 372 Pages's readthrough of this book, I deadass thought the "models" were going to end up being child soldiers with superpowers who fought against an external threat- beautiful, skilled, but also at risk of death. Some people wanted to be selected as models, while others would pray not to be given this "gift". Anyway, that's the plot to my Modelland AU fanfiction, planned to begin in 2023.
@@ohshit4860 I watched Allison Praeglor read it the whole thing had me rolling on the floor. It was just so terribly written if I ever find it at a garage sale or at Goodwill I'm definitely getting it.
The weirdest thing, judging from the clips of Tyra Banks, is that this book wasn't intended to be surreal, metaphorical, satirical, etc. It was meant as a straightforward fantasy story, one that was obviously never viewed by a single editor... or, if it was, Tyra fired them at the slightest hint of negative or constructive feedback. There are way too many tones, themes, and ideas competing for attention here, and she wanted to keep them all.
I'm a bit of a high fashion buff and I can maybe answer a few questions Krim had about the fashion industry - basically, America's Next Top Model, or any TV reality show like Project Runway are largely considered to be jokes within the industry, not to say that it's even considered to be the kiss of death. Only model who came out of America's Next Top Model and who became famous later on is Winnie Harlow, and even then, it's widely considered that she became famous IN SPITE of the show. America's Next Top Model has a long history of emotional and verbal abuse towards the girls competing, and many of the challenges the girls do aren't anything models are required to do in the slightest, so the excuse they get from Tyra Banks that "oh well if you don't do it that means you don't have what it takes" is complete bullshit.
Winnie Harlow was on top model? Wow, I’m surprised she became so successful. I’ve seen a a few episodes, mostly the make overs, but they’re pretty rough. I was surprised how rude and manipulative Tyra was. I’m also surprised the show had so many seasons.
@@lindseystein9676 She was - I think she competed under her real name and not as Winnie Harlow, but I could be wrong. One who had a lot to say was Jeana Turner - I strongly recommend checking out the Instagram stories she uploaded on Twitter. Same with the girl Tyra was yelling at during the infamous "we were rooting for you" speech - she basically said the version we got on TV was a lot more tame.
@@TheMTG666 The only designer who has had any kind of success afterwards is Christian Siriano, and a lot of fashion critics give him the stink eye since a lot of his collections are more "accessible" designs of more experimental designers (a lot like what Maria Grazia Churi's Dior does with designers like Mary Katrantzou). Other than that... you never hear of the other winners again. Which is not a good track record to have, and it seems like participating at a TV reality show is a stigma on contestants to find work later on more than anything else.
I think it was revealed that Tyra didn't even actually go to business school, she took a course that lasted I think a month at the campus but she wasn't actually a student. I watched Illuminatii's video on the mlm Tyra tried to start which is where I got that info.
You're right! I was gonna say this but was sure someone else would catch it lol. She didn't actually attend harvard business school. I wouldn't care that she lied about it if she didn't use her degree to try and get people to join her MLMs :/
I gotta say, after hearing stories of omnipotent girls ruining the world, a CIA-wannabe written by a racist zombie and a whole swarm of disturbing Onision puppets it refreshing to see a main character that isn't absolutely unlikeable. Boring and pathetically underwhelming sure, but still likeable.
hey, Titus Uno, Certified Public Accountant, Forensic Certified Public Accountant, and Chartered Global Management Accountant was a good protagonist. despite the fact that Titus Uno, Certified Public Accountant, Forensic Certified Public Accountant, and Chartered Global Management Accountant was a self insert, Titus Uno, Certified Public Accountant, Forensic Certified Public Accountant, and Chartered Global Management Accountant was not a mary sue or even relevant to the plot at all
@@errortryagainlater4240 It would be a battered wasteland, shattered by the War of the Sues. A formless grey void, bereft of any objects with significance of their own, nothing existing unless it is connected to the Sue who reigns supreme here. A few objects stand out in sharp relief against the fog of irrelevance, often encrusted with pointless but pretty gold and jewels. Those are the treasures of the Sues, the only things that matter, the only things that truly ARE matter. NPCs creep over the ruins with empty smiles pasted across nondescript "faces"; once, some of them were people, but the warping influence of the Sues sapped all nuance and, in the end, humanity from them, until they were no longer actors in their stories, but objects to be acted upon. Occasionally, the mist will part from around one of them, and they will lift their head and cry out "YOU ARE SO AMAZING!" and speak the name of the nearest Sue. And in every corner, though it be spoken by a different voice, the refrain echoes in the ears of any left to hear: "ORIGINAL CHARACTER, DO NOT STEAL."
@@ChallengeIdeasi imagine it's like ravenloft. Everyone has their own domain that distorts their desires. You've got Ebony D.D. Ravenway's eternal goth hogwarts, Theresa's hellscape with an exploding north pole, greg's middle/high school time loop realm, etc.
During my internship, i used to be a dresser at various fashion shows. There were two of us per model and a floater, one removing clothes and another putting on the next outfit and the floater for accesories. It really is like a pit stop kind of deal, a LOT of teamwork and coordination to get them out in less than 2 minutes. I HATE that that has relegated to 'tiny hands'...like damn, we are actual people
My favorite thing about Modelland reviews/readings is the moment where the reader comes across Guru Applaussez. Some change the name to make fun of it, some change the name because they refuse to deal with a name like that, and some deadass just misread it as something else, but no matter which of those applies, all roads inevitably lead to Applesauce. Everyone does it. Well done Tyra, you somehow managed to bring all of humanity together in the most pointless, bonkers way imaginable.
If you're seeking genuine feedback on your work, then it can't be as bad as the likes of these books. If you're open to criticism, you're leaving room for growth and improvement. That goes a long way
Alright here's how I would fix modelland: First is Ci-L is known to be the daughter of the prima donna. It turns out tookie is the illegitimate child. Basically Donna got pregnant with CL with her state approved bf (probably like the top student at the boy's school) since she's still in school the child is raised by the servants until Donna becomes an adult. But a couple years later she has another kid this time with the builder guy and so that child is taken away and raised in secret for a few years then given to Donna's school friend creamy to raise. That's tookie. Now CL finds out from one of the servants (the manicant who was the other friend of Donna's) that she has a sister. She wants to meet her and uses her triple 7 powers to transform into Lizzie and befriends tookie. Tookie's sister was chosen for the school but CL changes the list so she can be closer to her sister. Ok now some other not main plot things. It seems like Lizzie is experiencing the pain of some other people so I propose that the friends of CL who tried to leave didn't actually die. She found them mostly dead on the mountain and used her magic to save them but they're all in comas. In saving them she tied their life forces to hers and so whenever they dream of something painful or traumatic she feels that too. Maybe in the second book you could have CL and tookie look for a way to wake them up. Also do more with CL trying to break the social norms of modelland and let us see the group of kids get bullied/harassed by teachers more.
When I was younger, I used to watch Tyra Banks psychologically torture skinny girls on ANTM. Now, in my older years, I watch Tyra Banks psychologically torture book reviewers
Anyone notice how, once Tookie becomes ugly in the mirror, she is immediately called “it?” It’s like Tyra Banks doesn’t think of unattractive people as real people.
@@RubykonCubes3668 the text says, “An older, unrecognizable person was staring at Tookie. It had…” She specifically references a person, then says “it.” The decision seems really cruel and against the book’s theme.
The story and characters' extreme fixation on physical appearance is nothing short of MORTIFYING. It's actually pretty worrying as an indicator on what the author must think of those things.
Okay, but Love Nikki is good. Lol I’ve been playing it for like, four years now. Though I will admit I gave up understanding the story years ago. Shining Nikki has a more coherent plot that they seemingly put more care into building.
@@TheSlipperyNUwUdle I stopped bothering trying to follow the story after like... 4 chapters? Lol didn't even try with shining nikki. I'm here for the clothes, baby lol
@@SolKaras you should give SN story a try. It makes a lot more sense and I think they’re making decisions on what happens next a lot more carefully. Though I can totally understand just being there for the clothes. Lol
This comes across as a 13 year old on Wattpad's first attempt at an original story. Poorly written to be sure, but it almost feels like someone who's genuinely having fun with their project. The only difference is that Tyra Banks is a grown woman whose message of self love is tainted by her job
Of the 11 books in the Masochistc Tango so far, Modelland is the only one that I would read. The other books in the series had issues like having unbearable main leads, forcing political themes when they are out of place, terrible sex scenes, botching the handling of serious topics in offensive ways, portraying abusive and creepy behavior as romantic, plagiarism, and being pure cringe. Modelland on the other hand is batshit insane and the plot sounds like Persona or Final Fantasy on crack. It's bad but in a way that is entertaining.
It sounds like it gets to the moniker of so bad it's good and then manages to stay there, where the other books either never get to that level or get there briefly and then through one method or another ends up out of that range into tedium.
Honestly, I feel like the twist at the end could have worked with Tookie being the Belladona's daughter instead of Ci-L. Just imagine that Wingtip doesn't exist and it's Crobat (Tookie's dad) there instead. Creamy, forced to stay behind, agrees to help him raise Tookie, and the two fall in love. Later on Crobat becomes disillusioned with the fact that the Belladonna might have been cheating on him (after all, she didn't care enough about him and their daughter to stay behind with them) and convinces himself that Tookie isn't his. Now that he and Creamy have their own child, they begin to feel like Tookie is just a burden thrust upon them by an ex-friend/ex-lover who didn't want her, adding a reason to why they hate her so much besides the fact that she doesn't look pretty. The toothbrush scene would have to be worked of course, but honestly Creamy could just say something vague like "she looks just like her mother" or something. Honestly though, I would rework Ci-L's role in the story entirely. Based on this summary, she feels just arbitrarily thrown into the narrative whenever possible (and the twist about the pyramid things just feels like an arbitrary reason for the Belladonna to get mad at her and force her to come back to Modelland). I feel like you could go a few ways with her, but the sake of this already being a long post, here's one. The Belladonna sees her as an adoptive daughter, a possible replacement for her missing daughter. She spoils her and gives her all the best stuff. However, Ci-L begins to go down the same path of the Belladonna and falls in love with a civilian, so the Belladonna whisks her away to Modelland and doesn't allow her to leave again. Ci-L, having no idea why the Belladonna is doing this besides "peasants bad", rebels in every way possible, including changing the list of people being accepted into Modelland. So, just kind of have her as a background character constantly pushing back against Modelland's rules or whatever.
I haven't even watched the video yet, I just scrolled down to see what was up and I see THIS. I don't think i'm prepared for whatever is in store for me.
As completely bizarre and contrived as Tyra's world sounds, I would be lying if I said I didn't find a lot of creative horror elements in it that I enjoyed. The monsters composed of body parts immediately brings to mind a specific Silent Hill monster that was composed of countless mannequin arms, legs, and heads that turned out to be taken from its victims and transformed... but that monster was from the dumpster fire that was the second Silent Hill movie adaptation. Perhaps its like a creepypasta creature; the many appendage monster appears only in awful media trying to be profounnnnddd..... This book gives me the same feeling of insanity as watching Jupiter Ascending. All this creativity culminating in a face palm.
It is extremely absurdist, somewhat gorey and grisly... It's so fascinating. Kind of wish Tyra could just spitball her novel ideas to a good writer and editor and see where it goes.
The comparison to Jupiter Ascending LOL. I feel this so much, as someone who loves Jupiter Ascending for how weird/bad of a ride it was, there is a part of me that wants more from that fucking universe but like specific parts they never focused on lol. One example would be the space police lol. There's def parts of Modelland I'd love to know more about just for the morbid curiosity of it all lol.
It reminds me of Asphyxia, a boss from Silent Hill: Homecoming. It’s a monster made of several linked torsos, with arms on each torso, and actually walking on hands.
literally the entire time i was watching the video i was like "why does this book feel so familiar" and you just made me realize its because it has the same batshit overcomplicated ridiculous vibes as jupiter ascending.
That's Tyra Banks though. Her entire body of work is creative but cringe. Watching any episode of top model or the Tyra show will tell you that she's an odd duck
De la cremè = with the cream, it’s used a lot in the names of French cookies with either icing on top or cream inside, also sometimes with the names of coffee or teas that have either cream or vanilla in them. The main characters name is Tookie, it’s like one letter away from cookie, so her name is basically cookies with cream in English. Hi I’m Natalie, I possess approximate knowledge of many languages, and this has been *my* TED talk.
Also: "Creme de la creme" is an idiom (either from France or maybe bastardized by English-speaking places) that means "best of the best." So Tookie de la Creme is probably supposed to be like, the absolute best there is among all the other characters, despite having "ugly" traits like being incredibly tall and thin and having effing heterochromia. I'm so confused by what Tyra seems to think makes society think someone is unattractive.
@@Arosukir6 Crème de la crème is used in France, it refers to the cream being the best thing you can get from milk, making the crème de la crème the best of the best
These names sound like something a 12 year old on Deviantart came up with, and I say this as someone who used to be on that website at that age and had terribly named OCs and friends with terribly named OCs. We had two ways of naming OCs, overly complicated words no human besides us can pronounce and basic names that have been used about a million times.
You might need to glance at (DO NOT read) Blind Faith by Ben Elton. An awful smug attempt at a dystopian satire where people are called names like Quarterpounder Ipod and Slushy Happymeal. Embarrassing bollocks, in short.
Tyra didn't get into Harvard, and she certainly did not graduate with a business degree. She went to a 6 week seminar that any Tom, Dick, or Harry could go to with enough funds.
You mentioned a couple times that some aspects of the book seem like a subtle critique of the modelling industry, but I think it's worth mentioning that Tyra is one of the people *causing* some of those issues. Those aspects may show up in the book because they just seem... natural to her.
I’m only an hour in, but I feel strangely inspired to write some short stories based on my weirdest thoughts. Since that’s clearly what this lady did lol
the bad/amazing world building, lost side plots, and strange characterization got me to open up the airtable story bible i have to start adding to it don't want to become a banks. or do i? i don't know if this thing is amazing or horrifying yet, but it is undeniably aspirational in some way
I’ve seen games that have a similar premise so maybe if you get the chance you could try that out (The games I’m talking abou are LSD dream emulator, and Yumme Nikki and it’s many fan games)
Bizarrely enough, there is actually at least one significant work of literature that does the multiple-self-insert thing: The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde. Oscar Wilde wrote in his personal correspondence that the character Basil Hallward represents who he really is, Lord Henry Wotton represents who the world at large thinks he is, and Dorian Gray represents who he wishes he could be. However, Oscar Wilde's characters and plot are rather better thought out than Tyra Banks', to say the least. The clip of Tyra at the end is honestly painful to watch, because I agree with the message she's apparently trying to convey, that people of all colors, genders, and sizes can be beautiful, but it becomes a somewhat less persuasive message when it's delivered by someone having an emotional meltdown and screaming like a crazed lunatic.
And the fact that she is just Not really… helping to push the message with her own actions. So it is also just a shallow message. And Next Top Model really shows how wrong her actions are.
Another self-insert story was Dante's Divine Comedy; where he lauds his own writing style as magnificent and famous amongst other people of note, and people and politicians he didn't like were condemned to hell.
@@cymond Let's not forget how Inferno reserves a place in hell specifically for people who commit suicide. In the frickin' seventh circle, sharing the same level as people who murder their neighbors or commit bestiality. Super classy guy, that Dante.
Model land could have worked if they built it on the old geisha system in japan. You had an entire prefecture propped on their very existence not because they were special but to make them special. Clothes, beauty treatments, food...etc all to cater to either the geishas or their rich patrons needs. Not because they were beautiful but because they were a status symbol for the patron.
For every example you could use to argue the book has a good message about defying beauty standards, there is an example of the narration bashing people for their looks with seemingly no awareness. A good portion of the book is dedicated to a character who doesn't shave and talking about how ugly and horrible she is until she finally does shave. It's needlessly cruel to an older woman who thought she might be chosen for TDOD. It constantly uses Creamy's wrinkles as a symbol of her awfulness while also mocking her for trying to hide them. The story is about how Modelland needs reform but it portrays the people protesting Modelland as hypocrites who don't actually care about their cause and drop it the second TDOD starts (suggesting a "they're just jealous" attitude towards anyone against the beauty industry). I disagree with the idea this book is harmless because even aside from the more obviously problematic things (how badly it handles self harm, casual sexism and ableism, racial stereotyping of the Asian characters, etc) it tells the teen girls this is aimed at, and are probably fans of Tyra's, that even in this book about being accepted, they are not acceptable if they don't fit Tyra's idea of beauty
“Wait, so if the magic isn’t responsible for paving the roads and keeping the electricity running, what’s powering the cities?” “Oh! All of our less attractive men run on giant hamster wheels underground… I’m not really sure how it works…”
Honestly, that sounds like it would be one of the less surreal ideas floating through this novel. At least it's slightly grounded in reality as we know it.
The funny thing is she ended up on the New York times' bestseller list in the children's literatue category instead the adult novel she was aiming for. Also this is the edited version they had to cut 500-1,000 pages from the manuscript.
@@errortryagainlater4240 yeah they thought with how fast and whimsical it was there was no question of it being a children's book. Bookstores put it in their kid's section even more after that.
@@ayajade6683 there’s things place in the children section that more aimed at older children/teens/young adults like the boy in the striped pyjamas as an example
Masochistic Tango series books best to worst (so far): 11. Modelland 10. Trigger Warning 9. The Mister 8. Handbook for Mortals 7. Twilight: Midnight Sun 6. Ready Player Two 5. Stones to Abigail 4. This is Why I Hate You 3. Reaper's Creek 2. Empress Theresa 1. 64 Squares No surprise that this Modelland is the best in the series. There's quite a gap between it and Trigger Warning. (BTW I don't know if I should switch Handbook for Mortals and Midnight Sun or keep it the same)
At least to me, it seems like this whole world runs on dream logic, which would be a valid writing style for something as strange as the modeling industry. Unfortunately, I don't think the author was writing it that way intentionally.
Did she just casually include a princess as a main character and give it no fanfare? Also how is Tookie forgettable? I doubt with looks that unique she’s forgettable.
The ideas in this book seem so surreal to me- honestly, like a Neil Gaiman concept. The plot needs tightening up, and I'm totally unsure if it was what the author was going for, but it all seems bizarre and strangely dark- I feel like I'd kinda dig a stop motion show based from this world, or a cartoon.
I somehow suspect is just a "this is how my life sucks, in a thin fantasy setting". Its creepily dystopian, and sounds sort of in a way a secret way to vent.
It sounds kind of like the weirdly dark stories I'd write as a kid being stressed out by my home life, so I'm glad I wasn't the only one who thought this.
Another note. The heck is up with all the one off scp monsters in this thing!? Like seriously!? It's some...really cool stuff that gets pushed aside for some stupid and weird shit!
45:00 Gonna have to disagree with a one of the "dumb" powers. "thirty never" is just straight up immortality. Thats not useless thats op as fuck and would guarantee that person position as head of state.
It's dumb because why wouldn't you just set a single age and stay at that, rather than deal with the agonizing pain of your bones, skin, hair, and organs ungrowing? Growth spurts are bad enough, I don't want to think what it would be like to do that in reverse. I'm only 20, I would not like to have all the changes my body has undergone in the last 3 years overdone overnight
@@filmandfirearms Women usually stop growing two years after menarche, so to go back to 17 only necessitates reversing actual growth if she started her cycle around 15 or 16.
@@YouWillBeHappyOrElse Yes there's no more height growth (usually) but the body still goes through tons of changes and at least me personally, I wouldn't wanna go back to 17/18 and have to go through all of that pain. Cuz there is still pain in developing to full maturity. Breasts can continue to grow into your early twenties and that shit hurts. Nevermind all the mental maturity even going from 18 to 25
The part with the half naked teens reminded me of an episode of America's Next Top Model where Tyra "disciplined" a contestant for not feeling comfortable with doing a nude photo shoot.
@@KM-hv1jg what was most aggravating about it is that Tyra would tell the models that you have to be open to it, or you won’t work in the industry. She would literally eliminate contestants for not being comfortable posing nude. But not only did Tyra never pose nude in her entire career, but she actively refused to do so and went on to be a successful model. So she refused to respect their boundaries after demanding that EVERYONE in the industry respect hers.
This book reminds me of the Uglies and Pretties books, but with the worldbuilding totally botched. I remember those books being pretty good, they also have a world built around a hierarchy based on beauty standards. The science fiction aspects are pretty cool, and while it might not be a perfect series, it's definitly a better version of this.
I remember those books! I remember liking them, but being really disappointed with the main character’s willingness to just…go along with what everyone else wants her to do. Like, she got got captured and just…became a Pretty? And I can’t remember how she became a Special but it also just kinda…happened to her? Which now that I type that, that’s probably a commentary on society forcing women, especially young women, to do and be whatever society wants of them.
You can’t see the comment before clicking on the video so the main purpose of dislikes (seeing the reaction to a video beforehand, if you see a colossal amount of dislikes compared to likes it probably isn’t a good video) doesn’t work here but it’s a nice sentiment. Of course the best option would be for TH-cam to bring the dislikes back because it serves no one to hide them.
I want a dose of whatever Tyra had while writing this book, because it's absolutely bonkers. I don't think she was going for drug-induced visions of a surreal dystopia filled with incoherent nightmare fuel creatures... but for being what it is, it's gold.
I was watching this video when my sister noticed something. There are actually four self-inserts. Zar is also Tyra. She was a mean girl in school, and then once she hit puberty, she became freakishly tall and was bullied for it. The catapiller bus is Tyra's nightmare form. Another thing my sister noticed. The line when the guy says I don't know which one I like more, your brown eye or your blue eye, is lifted from the Clique series. Tyra worked on the movie adaptation. My sister thinks Tyra is another person who did not get over being bullied in high school.
my favorite part of Modelland is how obvious it is that Tyra wrote this and not a ghost writer. No one except Tyra has the mental capacity to create something so amazing
Unfortunately it was written by a ghostwriter named Michael Salort. I truly hope he was paid enough to cover the therapy he would need after bringing to life the insanity Tyra Banks made him write.
TB when she looks at other women (apparently): Her lips are approximately 3.759 mm too wide and the gap between her eyebrows is .361 mm too close and the tips of her eyes are 1.484 mm too far from the tips of her ears which are 4.192 mm too far from the tip of her chin and . . . Me: are you ok? Like mentally 🙃
6:43 "Tooki lives in a country called Miitopia" That's definitely not how the country was spelled but I don't care, I heard the name and now I'm imagining the protag as a Mii
The fashion in Madoka is really awesome! I’m a guy and it gets me geeking out. And then you got the nightmare elements added in… So yeah, I’m seeing parallels…
Honestly this might be the best YA book ever written because it's not trying to be super serious or edgy, it doesn't pull back on its own ridiculous gore or worldbuilding (or lack thereof) for a young audience, the sexualization of minors is an actual plot point meant as a joke/maybe commentary, it exists solely as a middle aged woman's power fantasy and was actually marketed and sold as such, and none of it means anything. It's just fucking hilarious. I've never heard of a book that just completely doesn't try to be what it's not and has so much fun lavishing in its own awfulness. Watching this video is honestly inspiring me to start writing again I can't believe this
About the two self-inserts, I don't think that having multiple self-inserts of 1 person is a bad thing, but it needs to be handled well - a good example is The Picture of Dorian Gray, in which the titular Dorian, Basil and Henry and all inserts for Oscar Wilde, the author. Main difference is that Wilde makes them into avatars representing different aspects of himself and toys with perception, which is a recurring theme in the novel - "Basil Hallward is what I think I am; Lord Henry what the world thinks me; Dorian what I would like to be in other ages, perhaps."
This book at times feels like a fashion-conscious Alice in Wonderland... Nothing makes sense, there are storylines and characters created and abandoned randomly, and I never know whether I am amused or annoyed by the weirdness
"Hey, we live in SansColor. What does that mean?" "Oh, it means 'without color.'" "...Then why is our language Colorian?" "I don't know, what's a color?"
It made the whole Autism-Community proud, so i hope you have all seen Hbomberguys Newest Video, as it was partially about Autism. If you didnt knew that guy, please see this comment as my christmas-gift to you.
Modelland reminds me of the villain's weird Wonka-esque factory in Spy Kids. I feel like Tyra was channeling that very 90's kids movie vibe when describing it. And Ci-L really feels like a Tyra insert, a total Mary Sue who is single-handedly fighting the good fight against the narrow idea of beauty and lifting her poor, less fortunate lessers up from obscurity through her magnanimous generosity of spirit and being punished for it.
Ever since I first heard of Modelland through your review, I haven't been able to stop thinking about "Multiple Personality Disorder Hair." It's just such a hilariously tone-deaf phrase that it'll probably never leave my mind.
When TH-cam recommended a 3 hour long video about a book with a name as ridiculous as Modelland.... I certainly didn't think I'd be here at the end, thoroughly entertained, amused, incredulous, aghast, confounded, impressed and dismayed. Very well done - thank you! 🙏
I actually thought it was an edgy spelling or play on the French word 'le ciel' - heaven, only because of how much French she put in the book, and how that would fit with the book's weirdarse world generally (just a theory though!)
within the fashion world, being able to 100% accurately predict the next years trends is incredibly useful since coming up with the ideas can start up to 2 years beforehand and gathering materials for production happens a year before!!!
I’m sure it’s been said somewhere in the comments section (or maybe not idk), but the differences between Rookie’s flashback and the other two girls’ flashbacks could have been an interesting character moment for Tookie if it had been explored more. Perhaps others would view it as a happy memory, but it could actually be something painful for Tookie to think about considering since her parents were showing complete favoritism to “Miracle”. When we meet the parents, we see that they treat Tookie like shit, yet in the flashback they are shown as being loving towards her like regular parents. My guess is that essentially Tookie and her parents are happy together (and Tookie is even excited to get a little sibling/sister), but then “Miracle” is born and the parents completely drop their love for Tookie for it to go towards “Miracle” only. Either that or “Miracle” started showing some modeling talent early on and the parents completely hyperfocused on that like irl parents do to vicariously live through their children. So perhaps Tookie is shown a “happy” flashback because her traumatic experience is that her parents don’t actually love her as they used to. Buuuut I’m probably reading too deeply into things considering it sounds like it isn’t explored in the moment after being shown, which would have been the best time for it and for Tookie to reflect on how her family had been treating her for presumably years.
Wait... They synced up their periods in order to train them to endure pain for the sake of professionalism, and to make their time management reliable... but also made it the last period so they would never have to worry about it again?
@@thewafflebat3722 she was one of the top fashion models out of the 90s. Along with Kate Moss, Naomi Campbell, Heidi Klum, Cindy Crawford, etc. Shit, Naomi would cut a bitch. Like their names were as big as those in acting back then. I don't even know who the top tier models are nowadays, but you couldn't escape these names in the day.
@@thewafflebat3722 She's one of the main...like...people when it comes to American Idol. She is very manipulative and verbally abusive (I think physically as well) to the models themselves. Not a nice woman 🙄
I have absolutely fallen in love with your longform reviews, and seeing this video was 3 hours long got me HYPED! These have become my motivational podcasts for writing my own works, and I hope you keep them coming!
Ngl your thirties are probably the best age to be stuck in as an immortal. If you're stuck in a body that's _too_ young, nobody would ever take you seriously.
@@errortryagainlater4240 the way I understood ThirtyNever is once you hit 30 your body reverts to 18 and starts aging again to 30 in a never-ending cycle. That’s why it’s called “thirty never” lol
By removing dislikes, youtube has rendered likes meaningless. To make them relevant again, use this comment to show any dislikes you have. Just hit the thumbs up, and let's keep the channel transparent.
I’m torn by my desire to click like on pinned comments and my desire to have a functioning dislike button again…
I liked but not because I dislike the video
I like this idea, like the video, and thus cannot like this comment. Interesting conundrum.
Yeah I’m not sure we can replace dislikes this way. Too many people just click it just to click it. It might be an inaccurate count in the future, but at least some people will have a way to show their criticism of the video I suppose.
if people want to see dislikes there's a few chrome extensions that are able to do that as of now, but this is also a good way to kind of show interest in the video although a little flawed.
I can’t stop laughing at the fact that every character seems to have some kind of weird name and be from a similarly weird-named fantasy land, and then there’s just “Angelica from Iceland”.
This comment made me 😂
It’s almost like the Public Accountant book (I’m not naming the whole title), but it feels self-aware and has an attempt of being bizarre/funny.
Iceland isn't real. Prove to me Iceland is a real place
@@vampiricn1ght Þiðmær
@@TravisBroski COMPLETELY off topic, but whenever the 'public accountant etc' came up it made me think of another book, "The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant", far superior in every way its a series about a vampire whose most interesting trait is he is an accountant because none of the other vampires know how to do their taxes
The part where her dad falls seven storeys but is fine because he tucks into a roll then impales his face on a sword taking a bow which causes him to lose an eye had me HOWLING
I am so mad at myself for reading comments before finishing the video, but at least I got a laugh out of this spoiler.
Wow~ I am in for a treat.
That was incredible. I'm now haunted by the idea that it could have been meant to be taken seriously
What is this Dark Souls bullshit? XD
that sounds actually amazing in the dumbest way possible wtf 😭
At least Tyra has comedic timing down, because that was legit funny.
Anyone else find it kind of disturbing that Tyra describing a character that isn’t a perfect 10 makes them sound like an eldritch horror badly pretending to be human?
Would've been so much better if this was horror.
I just treat this as an unwitting psyche piece
Yah a bit but it kinda works with the setting.
@@FIRSTNAMELASTNAME-zt4kf works in the setting that the author also made up, thereby giving an excuse to body shame and superficially attack people she describes in her book- young girls, no less- in her YA novel.
It’s extremely uncomfortable and damaging
I mean, when she was writing, she was imagining herself before she glowed up. A lot of people make fun of themselves lmaooo
There's a game called Love Nikki, which seems to be a cute dress up game where you fight wars with fashion. It does the 'world' of fashion' perfectly.
It turns out that everyone is cursed to die if they act violent, so wars are fought with fashion shows and every piece of clothing has magic that grows more powerful if correctly combined into a theme.
People will fall down exhausted if their outfit is outshone by an opponent.
People steal designs and accessories, entire towns are held hostage for fabric. There's a piece of lore text describing a designer being held hostage and starved to force her to work. Your best friend was orphaned over a suitcase full of dress instructions. You fight a city of vampires by finding the right outfit to ward them off.
Don't bother playing it, most of the content is seasonal.
I know this is an old comment but Nikki is coming out with a AAA game for consoles in the same universe! You can hold out for that and I'm sure it'll encompass all of the above and more. I'm excited for it
Wait, do you know which text describes the designer being held to work? Also, lmao it seems the story has been getting a little more violent lately, but I haven't really played in a while, so idk
I haven’t played that game in ages what happened lol
0/10 no goblins
@@taylorslade8080I stopped playing when Nikki died and the story stopped making sense because it dropped that story and did like a soft reset? I kind of want to go over the story again now though to see if they fixed it
Every time I hear metopia I instantly think of miitopia and just imagine a bunch of miis walking around with tookie being the one normal person
It would explain her eyes being so far apart and her mouth so big if she were a mii
Plus the Modelland theme song sounds straight out of the miiverse
I also imagine their faces being taken away at some point
I’m just going to say it: Tyra should shift over to writing surreal creepypasta/no sleep stories. She clearly likes writing about weird creatures and she could do it with enough practice.
Some parts of the book get shockingly gory and the body part monster is a thing of nightmares. She truly missed her calling as a horror writer.
That arm creature is something out of a Junji Ito novel. Maybe Modelland was written by him while he was high while watching America's Next Top Model.
I think she'd be totally suited to pure surrealist/absurdist stuff
@@msganymede18 see now I’m just mad this content isn’t existing on purpose
Bold of you to assume it wasn’t ghost written… which I’m almost certain it was
Ah, I've heard of this book through a former classmate.
She described it to me as "the mental breakdown of the supermodel known as Tyra Banks...in literary form".
Accurate.
That classmate’s got some clever wit.
@@drstrangelove307 She reads bad books out of sheer amusement.
This book, she says, is one of her favorites.
Guess they don't have great book recommendations for Tyra!
Wow😅
“was not the scum of the earth, she was not an old man with a waifu complex, and she wasn’t… *dead.”*
That caught me so off guard.
apparently Johnstone died in 2004 and Krimson just bluntly saying that he was dead just... damn
@@macdonaldsmilkjug5022 It's even weirder than that. Watch the last segment of Jenny Nicholson's review video on Trigger Warning for more of the backstory.
I think the whole video for Trigger Warning is worth the watch.
Catching you off guard Dr Bright is quite impressive
@@TheLegend-oy2sg especially with a death. You’d think Dr. Bright would be used to it by now. 😏
"Men are easy" Excuse you, I have standards. I stopped sleeping with my ex after she yelled at me over a Subway sandwich.
As you should.
👑
You ok, man?
@@Wired_User Haha, I'm just swell. I'm now a single father cause a different ex found out she'd rather fuck a bunch of ugly people than to raise our son.
Has she learned her lesson yet? (one year later)
I really wish people would look up the metric system before using it in their writing. Because the protag's facial dimensions are genuinely horrifying - she basically has a Joker smile and eyes on her temples
Tookie was like
👁️ 👁️ I'm quirky
👄
@@spookysugar more like
👁️ 👁️
---------
Since her mouth was also described as being too wide lmao
No wonder nobody talks to her
Lmaoooooo
Wait... it isn't supposed to look horrifying? (I'm only 25:11 min in and only half listening)
Modelland sounds like an unintentional dystopia.
Oh it's not unintentional.
It’s entirely intentional yet is also weirdly played straight? There are parts where I didn’t fully know if Tyra is positive or negative about her own modelling experience. But having been an ANTM viewer in my youth (like many young gay men like myself) I know that’s how Tyra actually is. She seems to praise modelling as a wonderful career that opens opportunities, yet also a shallow and misogynistic world that focuses on narrow beauty norms. It’s really quite bizarre.
@@hkazu63 tyra's definitely working through some shit in this. The modelling industry is screwed up
@@hkazu63 that's not so strange if you think about it. It's really difficult to talk or feel negatively about things that implicate yourself and the people you love. It's difficult to acknowledge that what happened to you was wrong when you want to forgive and move past it with little fuss. It's difficult to talk negatively about what made your current life possible, especially in the public eye. People would call her a hypocrite, and ungrateful, and fake, and a liar. People would say she's just bitter now that she's older and not in the spotlight of the youth obsessed model and beauty industry. Everyday people, especially fans, feel angry and hurt when someone comes out that they didn't like or want to do whatever it is the person loved them for doing because people don't like feeling like they've done something wrong, and people also feel very strongly that if you don't intentionally do something wrong then it becomes not wrong which is a symptom of hating feeling like they've done wrong. (Not that enjoying media where there's no indication that the people involved in creating it are unhappy to do so is wrong, but people are concerned with how they feel about things more than what needs addressing).
If she focused on the more horror elements like the monsters there's some potential. But this is more a glance into the madness of Tyra
Hypothetically If they way they lost their periods made them sterile it would mean that modelland would only be able to draw new models from the outside world who would steadily produce worse models as the traits that produce good models would be slowly breed out of the general population like some bizarre reversal of eugenics
It is actually a form of eugenics. Except, instead of turning the population into a supposedly idealized version of humanity, it makes them consistently worse
@@filmandfirearms I think OP called it reversal because you're taking out the genes you actually want instead of the ones you dont.
It's malgenics
That might actually explain the character's weird proportions. Centuries of pretty people being eliminated from the gene pool have led to everyone alive being horribly deformed and not even realizing it.
@@filmandfirearmsThe "eu-" in "eugenics", just like in "eulogy", means "good", so no, it's definitely reverse eugenics.
“Rule number 1: don’t use semicolons”
Rule number 1.5: use semicolons after having properly researched how they work; skipping them altogether is just a waste
This comment deserves to be higher.
Rule Number 2. Become a programmer
Rule 2: {
if (you are a programmer) {
absolutely NEVER forget the semicolons;
} else : {
you will have much trouble;
}
}
I love semicolons. They're in between a comma and a period, which is helpful for my style of writing.
Honestly? Semicolons are a really good tool.
*”WHEN MY MOTHER YELLS AT ME LIKE THIS IT’S BECAUSE SHE LOVES ME!!”*
That actually explains a few things. I wonder how often her mother yelled at her like that growing up.
And she was yelling at the model for laughing off someone else's rude comment, because she had been IN ANGER MANAGEMENT THERAPY AND WAS SINCERELY TRYING TO IMPROVE HOW SHE DEALT WITH CONFLICT
But Tyra expected her to be the villain and had a whole bit ready, and now oops everyone only remembers Tyra because she went ahead with her Reason You Suck speech when it didn't fit
@@QuikVidGuy citation plz
@@savannahm9943
There's more than a few interviews about it.
@@kayleighbrown459 I was asking you in a jocular manner about which interview or tv show clip so I don’t have to comb through an endless sea of videos
@@savannahm9943 with a vernacular that includes “jocular” I’d imagine that you’d be used to doing a little bit of reading and digging up information on your own, considering that’s not a word lazy people know or use.
I feel like Tyra missed her calling her calling as a body horror author. There's a very good foundation for some of the weird horrific stuff that happens, like the mirrors distorting you and the legizards and whatnot.
Or maybe she'd just make for a great Nechronica GM, I could see it. I might use some of this, actually.
...that's genius. so might I
(Hi, fellow nechronica fan?)
@@monitaroy7462 Hello, fellow Nechromancer!
Are you taking Tyra’s ideas for an ongoing or future campaign? I’m on the off-season for Nech currently, hoping to start again come Feb/March.
@@legateelizabeth I'm currently running a campaign for my tabletop friends, and I am indeed thinking of taking some ideas from here. First order of business, probably, is statting up some monsters :P
The legs and feet monster would have made a good witch for the Madoka Magica series.
I don't think she missed her calling as a body horror author, I think decades of her and the world focusing purely on her body warped her perceptions until she had gone through every fear related to body image, and can now relate that to other people. It's very tied to her career.
This book is essentially Tyra Banks’ Sonichu. It’s an unhinged narrative that can only truly be understood by looking into the authors other insane projects, and it’s sole purpose seems to be to inflate the authors already massive ego.
The main self-insert character even has heterochromia!
fuck I didn’t even realize that
cant' wait for Krimsom doing Sonichu
@@SUNSHINE-t-m We need a petition for Krim to read and review sonichu
Haven't I bled enough yet? XP
"First book in a series" oooh boy, more fun to us and more damage to Krimson's mental health
I guess it’s a proposed trilogy but no other books ever released…and i think it’s been about a decade since Modelland released at this point…
@@mikaschumacher340 not other books in the series as if yet? That means krimson may have a stay of execution for the time being.......
(Is that Mollymauk/Lucien from Critical Role campaign 2?)
How is this man still alive after witnessing Onion's books?
@@notoriouswhitemoth Long may he reign
... this book is somehow both too graphic and too immature for teenagers... hard to believe it was written by a middle-aged woman
My thoughts exactly
Not gonna lie, 11 year old me would've LOVED Modelland. The nonsense has a certain charm to it, kinda like Alice in Wonderland.
I was thinking the same thing!
I was thinking the wizard of oz
got to admit same
15 year old me loved it
It also has a bit of subtle horror elements to it. Like that leg monster, or whatever the fuck guru applesauce is.
Honestly the "sense next year's fashion" and "make people want to buy things" would be extremely good super powers. Set up a shop somewhere good, stock up on next year's most trending outfits, put the best ones up on display to attract window shoppers, then make them want to buy the clothes. The plan would be even more effective since this is a place obsessed with fashion. Bam, you're rich.
this is in Gibson's "Pattern Recognition"
The next trend sense isn't that great. Trends move in a general twenty-year cycle.
That's why things from y2k are trending now, all that's changed is we took the most salvageable parts and fit them into a rosetinted modern view of that era.
Examples of trends that came back:
• Chunky resin(?) rings
• Baguette bag
• Bucket hats
Didn't come back:
•dresses with jeans
•skinny scarf
•the weird circular belt
Things that will be coming back:
•Ballet Flats
•Ballet core in general (especially younger version)
Edit: format ugly + extra examples
The problem with that is it invalidates Modelworld in and of itself. If you have those spells who needs models to entice people?
I don't think Tyra Banks planned her story or her world entirely, but wrote a big chunk of the book just on her loose ideas, forgot some of what she wrote in the beginning, then read it when she was nearing the end and realized she hadn't used many of her first ideas and characters and therefore crammed them in way too late.
It could be the reason why it is so strangely chopped up as well.
Don't forget it was ghostwritten by Michael Salort
its trying to be harry potter while hiding that fact, you will notice that almost all the odd things that happen have a one to one correlation to something in that series, the teleporting being the most obvious
Powered By Cocaine™
@@audiosurfarchive Yup, you bet!
@@jo_helaci just a fun fact I've learned on this they had to cut 500-1,000 pages out of the manuscript before it was approved for printing. I only know this as Allison Pregler did a full reading of the book with some fun snippets of research.
... why do I have a feeling Zarpessa is the stand-in for Naomi Campbell and that it's essentially all Tyra Banks's revenge fantasy
That would make a lot of sense, actually.
You know what, that'd make perfect sense. It already reads like a bad fanfic, so the "I hate this person so they are the comically bad guy in my story" trope is a given.
I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING like the entire dynamic reminded me of that one episode of tyra where naomi campbell was the guest and tyra just seemed like she was projecting her insecurities on naomi the entire episode
_Oh my god._
😂😂😂😂
as someone with a really basic understanding of french, its hillarious how many times tyra banks just uses the plain-ass french word for something to make it seem ~magical and fantastical~
She probably should have rework her French words to make them magical and fantastical
As someone who’s entire education has been in french and who has french relatives, the girl named walk walk made me laugh way too hard. I feel like French works in the same way a joke or a horror movie does. It’s mystical/funny/terrifying until you take out the insides to see how it works.
_guru applaussez_
@@aangelkin5553 Tookie *De la Crème*, *Très Jolie* (language/country i think)
I speak Polish and whenever a more ambitious movie director uses it to create a more spooky and mysterious atmosphere I cringe a little bit. I know what they want viewers to feel but it's difficult to take it seriously when you recognize that the VA is either not Polish or is raised in USA. It ruins the suspense when you imagine that the author of the spooky voice is most likely an extra or intern living in suburbs or something like that
For similar reasons it's also strange to hear German language spoken by obvious non-Germans. I guess learning languages spoils the fun a little bit
this book could almost serve as an allegory for just how absurdly warped and messed up what people will do to make themselves "pretty" in the real world. I feel Tyra unironically gave just the perfect ammo for people to re work this into a complete horror story of sacrificing your basic biological functions and normal life for the sake of getting attention. She actually made it easier to turn this into a horror story than Norman did for Empress Theresa. I'm almost floored by that
As an Australian I'm laughing so hard at Digeridoo Land. It's somehow completely bizarre and strangely accurate at the same time.
hearing a non-Aussie say "dero" seriously cracked me up so bad
Omg certain sections of this are so warped. There’s a whole “Bulimia takes your ability to menstruate away” section covered up by a class on “saving face” Jesus Tyra had no idea how deep her psyche is scarred
😬
You just hit the nail right on the head with this comment 💯💯
I pointed this out as a reply somewhere else but just the fixation on beauty in this story is extremely obvious and a worrying look into Banks' worldview. This just makes it worse.
@@unexpected2475 it’s the fact that I watched her show. While listing to this book breakdown I can hear her book hit every single emotional wave that corresponds to the commercial breaks. This is book is a blueprint to every episode of her show, and the high level of emotional trauma from adolescence that went into every single contestant. This shit is mortifying 🙈
@@unexpected2475 I mean, it doesn't surprise me much. Beauty is literally her career.
We need to make the KrimsonRogue bad book multiverse a thing.
I wanna see Daniel, Zade, and Empress Teresa fight to the death in the battle of the overpowered idiots!
Empress Teresa gives praises to God, but it doesn’t matter because Daniel hacked the universe and killed him after having underaged sex with his brainwashed girlfriend. Zade narrated about how the fight goes before showing how the fight goes. Empress Teresa then turns the entire world over, dooming the entire planet, but Daniel stops this by torturing other people even more.
Don't forget the nick fury equivalent brining them together: Titus Uno, CPA, FCPA, etc.
Not gonna lie, I'd read that book.
And Alessia and Bella Swan spectating from the side talking about how they can't get their man and aren't worthy of him.
Also Wade would totally join the fight, but he's too busy being addicted to the Oni and reminding people he got laid.
Screw Infinity War, THIS is the most ambitious crossover ever
The thing is, this book's setting is _kinda_ interesting. The problem is, it feels like it's being explored wrong; it's the worldbuilding equivalent going to France for the weekend, only to enter one supermarket on the first day, stand several feet from Mont Saint Michel for a quarter of an hour, then spend the rest of your time in your hotel room.
Like, where the hell are the Legizards from? Are they genetically-modified humans? Is this book set in the Cruelty Squad universe?
I get the strangest feeling it is. I think Cruelty Squad needs Modelland DLC.
P
On further thought, the parallels to Cruelty Squad make a lot of sense. That game is about the commodification of human bodies, among other things, and what is the modelling industry other than the commodification of bodies? In both cases, a life has no value but a body... a body is everything.
i did not expect a cruelty squad reference in this comment section of all places
@@gonb5434 this is the one place i WOULD expect cruelty squad refs
I'd kill for a movie of this directed by Robert Rodriguez and/or Guillermo Del Toro. This is an absurdist horror.
Other reviews I’ve seen make it seem like Jordan Peele would be a better fit tbh
Reading between the lines of this book, I think I learned more about Tyra than the book. One thing being: no one should be a model.
The fact that the country is called "Mytopia" (is that how it's spelled? I have no idea) is utterly hilarious to me considering the plot of this book is about as sane as the average Miitopia playthrough.
A plot thread of my miitopia play through:
Prince Edgeworth tries to marry Princess Bayonetta, but she falls for Zac Efron instead. Enraged, he summons the evil genie Will Smith, but he abandons him instead. Sounds about right.
I first read that as "Myopia" and bc id already forgotten what it was called, I was like "yeah, sounds about right"
@@tobyjack1238 feel bad for him, at least he got phoenix
I legit had to rewind the video when I heard that.
@@tobyjack1238 already unrealistic by the fact Edgeworth would never try to marry a woman lmfaooo
Oh God, the menstruation stuff had me literally screaming in horror! Look, I don't like periods as much as anyone, but the idea of some outside institution having full control over them is nightmarishly disturbing to me... Not even *I* get a say in those, why should you??
Right? I don't like my period but I have a huge fear of falling and would rather go *skydiving* than let someone other than myself have control of it. Fucking terrifying notion.
I agree, the whole time I was also thinking about how NOT having a period is actually harmful to the body (because of missing hormones I think?)
In the long term it *may* be a risk factor for things like osteoporosis but ofc not for folks who are on HRT :)
As someone who doesn't/can't menstruate, I was similarly freaked out. I just couldn't quite place why.
@@Kuraiko-nn4cl It can make conception harder. Not impossible, but harder because there's dead eggs left in the ovaries. I'm not sure about anything else though.
I literally have no idea what this book is about. I just listened to nonsense for three hours. I love this channel.
Lol, thanks! I guess I'm doing something right.
@@KrimsonRogue Doing a lot right!
Sometimes while reading The Hunger Games I think, wouldn't it be amazing to get a massive info dump on what life in the Capitol is like? And I think this book is the answer to that
When I was listening along to 372 Pages's readthrough of this book, I deadass thought the "models" were going to end up being child soldiers with superpowers who fought against an external threat- beautiful, skilled, but also at risk of death. Some people wanted to be selected as models, while others would pray not to be given this "gift". Anyway, that's the plot to my Modelland AU fanfiction, planned to begin in 2023.
I am lying in wait for this.
I think you've described the plot of Black Widow
nice
@@ohshit4860 I watched Allison Praeglor read it the whole thing had me rolling on the floor. It was just so terribly written if I ever find it at a garage sale or at Goodwill I'm definitely getting it.
Well, it's 2023. Clock is ticking.
The weirdest thing, judging from the clips of Tyra Banks, is that this book wasn't intended to be surreal, metaphorical, satirical, etc. It was meant as a straightforward fantasy story, one that was obviously never viewed by a single editor... or, if it was, Tyra fired them at the slightest hint of negative or constructive feedback. There are way too many tones, themes, and ideas competing for attention here, and she wanted to keep them all.
I agree!
I'm a bit of a high fashion buff and I can maybe answer a few questions Krim had about the fashion industry - basically, America's Next Top Model, or any TV reality show like Project Runway are largely considered to be jokes within the industry, not to say that it's even considered to be the kiss of death. Only model who came out of America's Next Top Model and who became famous later on is Winnie Harlow, and even then, it's widely considered that she became famous IN SPITE of the show.
America's Next Top Model has a long history of emotional and verbal abuse towards the girls competing, and many of the challenges the girls do aren't anything models are required to do in the slightest, so the excuse they get from Tyra Banks that "oh well if you don't do it that means you don't have what it takes" is complete bullshit.
Winnie Harlow was on top model? Wow, I’m surprised she became so successful. I’ve seen a a few episodes, mostly the make overs, but they’re pretty rough. I was surprised how rude and manipulative Tyra was. I’m also surprised the show had so many seasons.
@@lindseystein9676 She was - I think she competed under her real name and not as Winnie Harlow, but I could be wrong.
One who had a lot to say was Jeana Turner - I strongly recommend checking out the Instagram stories she uploaded on Twitter. Same with the girl Tyra was yelling at during the infamous "we were rooting for you" speech - she basically said the version we got on TV was a lot more tame.
I watched a couple of episodes and couldn't handle watching it anymore.It was just such an abusive workplace and the girls deserved better.
I honestly didn't know that project runway was considered a joke in the industry. could you please tell me why?
@@TheMTG666 The only designer who has had any kind of success afterwards is Christian Siriano, and a lot of fashion critics give him the stink eye since a lot of his collections are more "accessible" designs of more experimental designers (a lot like what Maria Grazia Churi's Dior does with designers like Mary Katrantzou). Other than that... you never hear of the other winners again. Which is not a good track record to have, and it seems like participating at a TV reality show is a stigma on contestants to find work later on more than anything else.
I think it was revealed that Tyra didn't even actually go to business school, she took a course that lasted I think a month at the campus but she wasn't actually a student. I watched Illuminatii's video on the mlm Tyra tried to start which is where I got that info.
You're right! I was gonna say this but was sure someone else would catch it lol. She didn't actually attend harvard business school. I wouldn't care that she lied about it if she didn't use her degree to try and get people to join her MLMs :/
I thought that I heard this too! She didn’t actually attend in the traditional sense, she just did a short course and got a certificate lol
Yeah it's a vanity course for CEOs who want to say they went to harvard.
I gotta say, after hearing stories of omnipotent girls ruining the world, a CIA-wannabe written by a racist zombie and a whole swarm of disturbing Onision puppets it refreshing to see a main character that isn't absolutely unlikeable.
Boring and pathetically underwhelming sure, but still likeable.
I really like to imagine that all these protagonists live in the same universe. It would explain so little and yet so much.
hey, Titus Uno, Certified Public Accountant, Forensic Certified Public Accountant, and Chartered Global Management Accountant was a good protagonist.
despite the fact that Titus Uno, Certified Public Accountant, Forensic Certified Public Accountant, and Chartered Global Management Accountant was a self insert, Titus Uno, Certified Public Accountant, Forensic Certified Public Accountant, and Chartered Global Management Accountant was not a mary sue or even relevant to the plot at all
@@errortryagainlater4240 It would be a battered wasteland, shattered by the War of the Sues. A formless grey void, bereft of any objects with significance of their own, nothing existing unless it is connected to the Sue who reigns supreme here. A few objects stand out in sharp relief against the fog of irrelevance, often encrusted with pointless but pretty gold and jewels. Those are the treasures of the Sues, the only things that matter, the only things that truly ARE matter.
NPCs creep over the ruins with empty smiles pasted across nondescript "faces"; once, some of them were people, but the warping influence of the Sues sapped all nuance and, in the end, humanity from them, until they were no longer actors in their stories, but objects to be acted upon. Occasionally, the mist will part from around one of them, and they will lift their head and cry out "YOU ARE SO AMAZING!" and speak the name of the nearest Sue.
And in every corner, though it be spoken by a different voice, the refrain echoes in the ears of any left to hear:
"ORIGINAL CHARACTER, DO NOT STEAL."
@@ChallengeIdeasi imagine it's like ravenloft. Everyone has their own domain that distorts their desires. You've got Ebony D.D. Ravenway's eternal goth hogwarts, Theresa's hellscape with an exploding north pole, greg's middle/high school time loop realm, etc.
I'm legitimately curious as to what "CIA-Wannabe written by a racist zombie" is referring to
During my internship, i used to be a dresser at various fashion shows. There were two of us per model and a floater, one removing clothes and another putting on the next outfit and the floater for accesories. It really is like a pit stop kind of deal, a LOT of teamwork and coordination to get them out in less than 2 minutes. I HATE that that has relegated to 'tiny hands'...like damn, we are actual people
Tbh I don't think anyone or anything in this book is an actual person
"Take the sea bass. It's still warm."
I feel like I could go to jail if I said that to a random stranger.
"I caught you a delicious bass."
That's only acceptable if you're an Animal Crossing character. Hahaha!
😂
My favorite thing about Modelland reviews/readings is the moment where the reader comes across Guru Applaussez. Some change the name to make fun of it, some change the name because they refuse to deal with a name like that, and some deadass just misread it as something else, but no matter which of those applies, all roads inevitably lead to Applesauce. Everyone does it. Well done Tyra, you somehow managed to bring all of humanity together in the most pointless, bonkers way imaginable.
even just now when i read it in ur comment i saw Applesauce and was confused when you said "all roads inevitably lead to Applesauce"
"pointless and bonkers", the perfect two word summary for this book, really.
😂😂😂 was my first time reading that name and I immediately went huh? I’m just going to say Applesauce and then the rest of ur comment just killed me 😂
Even if it's being completely destroyed I can only hope my novel is analyzed this deeply.
If you're seeking genuine feedback on your work, then it can't be as bad as the likes of these books. If you're open to criticism, you're leaving room for growth and improvement. That goes a long way
Same.
@@LifesNeverHumDrum exactly, nobody ever said that your first novel has to be your best!
Yours will be better than this one. That's not saying much, but you almost have to TRY to write one this bad.
Alright here's how I would fix modelland:
First is Ci-L is known to be the daughter of the prima donna. It turns out tookie is the illegitimate child. Basically Donna got pregnant with CL with her state approved bf (probably like the top student at the boy's school) since she's still in school the child is raised by the servants until Donna becomes an adult. But a couple years later she has another kid this time with the builder guy and so that child is taken away and raised in secret for a few years then given to Donna's school friend creamy to raise. That's tookie. Now CL finds out from one of the servants (the manicant who was the other friend of Donna's) that she has a sister. She wants to meet her and uses her triple 7 powers to transform into Lizzie and befriends tookie. Tookie's sister was chosen for the school but CL changes the list so she can be closer to her sister.
Ok now some other not main plot things. It seems like Lizzie is experiencing the pain of some other people so I propose that the friends of CL who tried to leave didn't actually die. She found them mostly dead on the mountain and used her magic to save them but they're all in comas. In saving them she tied their life forces to hers and so whenever they dream of something painful or traumatic she feels that too. Maybe in the second book you could have CL and tookie look for a way to wake them up.
Also do more with CL trying to break the social norms of modelland and let us see the group of kids get bullied/harassed by teachers more.
When I was younger, I used to watch Tyra Banks psychologically torture skinny girls on ANTM. Now, in my older years, I watch Tyra Banks psychologically torture book reviewers
Anyone notice how, once Tookie becomes ugly in the mirror, she is immediately called “it?” It’s like Tyra Banks doesn’t think of unattractive people as real people.
Yea i thought that was a little bit weird too, but that makes this even worse
I thougt "it" was referring to "the reflection". Since a reflection is more of a thing than a person
doesn't seem to like women once they're past 30, for that matter
or *gasp* overweight
a writer after just kidding, rowling's own heart
@@RubykonCubes3668 the text says, “An older, unrecognizable person was staring at Tookie. It had…” She specifically references a person, then says “it.” The decision seems really cruel and against the book’s theme.
The story and characters' extreme fixation on physical appearance is nothing short of MORTIFYING. It's actually pretty worrying as an indicator on what the author must think of those things.
This almost sounds like the setting to the "Love Nikki" mobile game - a strange other world where all disputes are settled... with fashion contests.
Except Love Nikki was more coherent story
Okay, but Love Nikki is good. Lol I’ve been playing it for like, four years now. Though I will admit I gave up understanding the story years ago. Shining Nikki has a more coherent plot that they seemingly put more care into building.
@@TheSlipperyNUwUdle I stopped bothering trying to follow the story after like... 4 chapters? Lol didn't even try with shining nikki. I'm here for the clothes, baby lol
@@SolKaras you should give SN story a try. It makes a lot more sense and I think they’re making decisions on what happens next a lot more carefully. Though I can totally understand just being there for the clothes. Lol
But LN has a lore explanation for it. They can't kill people or else you are cursed for the rest of your life
This comes across as a 13 year old on Wattpad's first attempt at an original story. Poorly written to be sure, but it almost feels like someone who's genuinely having fun with their project. The only difference is that Tyra Banks is a grown woman whose message of self love is tainted by her job
Of the 11 books in the Masochistc Tango so far, Modelland is the only one that I would read. The other books in the series had issues like having unbearable main leads, forcing political themes when they are out of place, terrible sex scenes, botching the handling of serious topics in offensive ways, portraying abusive and creepy behavior as romantic, plagiarism, and being pure cringe. Modelland on the other hand is batshit insane and the plot sounds like Persona or Final Fantasy on crack. It's bad but in a way that is entertaining.
It sounds like it gets to the moniker of so bad it's good and then manages to stay there, where the other books either never get to that level or get there briefly and then through one method or another ends up out of that range into tedium.
Honestly, I feel like the twist at the end could have worked with Tookie being the Belladona's daughter instead of Ci-L. Just imagine that Wingtip doesn't exist and it's Crobat (Tookie's dad) there instead. Creamy, forced to stay behind, agrees to help him raise Tookie, and the two fall in love. Later on Crobat becomes disillusioned with the fact that the Belladonna might have been cheating on him (after all, she didn't care enough about him and their daughter to stay behind with them) and convinces himself that Tookie isn't his. Now that he and Creamy have their own child, they begin to feel like Tookie is just a burden thrust upon them by an ex-friend/ex-lover who didn't want her, adding a reason to why they hate her so much besides the fact that she doesn't look pretty.
The toothbrush scene would have to be worked of course, but honestly Creamy could just say something vague like "she looks just like her mother" or something.
Honestly though, I would rework Ci-L's role in the story entirely. Based on this summary, she feels just arbitrarily thrown into the narrative whenever possible (and the twist about the pyramid things just feels like an arbitrary reason for the Belladonna to get mad at her and force her to come back to Modelland).
I feel like you could go a few ways with her, but the sake of this already being a long post, here's one. The Belladonna sees her as an adoptive daughter, a possible replacement for her missing daughter. She spoils her and gives her all the best stuff. However, Ci-L begins to go down the same path of the Belladonna and falls in love with a civilian, so the Belladonna whisks her away to Modelland and doesn't allow her to leave again. Ci-L, having no idea why the Belladonna is doing this besides "peasants bad", rebels in every way possible, including changing the list of people being accepted into Modelland. So, just kind of have her as a background character constantly pushing back against Modelland's rules or whatever.
As I read this I kept imagining Tookie's dad as Crobat the Pokemon ... so thank you for that
I haven't even watched the video yet, I just scrolled down to see what was up and I see THIS. I don't think i'm prepared for whatever is in store for me.
As completely bizarre and contrived as Tyra's world sounds, I would be lying if I said I didn't find a lot of creative horror elements in it that I enjoyed. The monsters composed of body parts immediately brings to mind a specific Silent Hill monster that was composed of countless mannequin arms, legs, and heads that turned out to be taken from its victims and transformed... but that monster was from the dumpster fire that was the second Silent Hill movie adaptation. Perhaps its like a creepypasta creature; the many appendage monster appears only in awful media trying to be profounnnnddd.....
This book gives me the same feeling of insanity as watching Jupiter Ascending. All this creativity culminating in a face palm.
It is extremely absurdist, somewhat gorey and grisly... It's so fascinating. Kind of wish Tyra could just spitball her novel ideas to a good writer and editor and see where it goes.
The comparison to Jupiter Ascending LOL. I feel this so much, as someone who loves Jupiter Ascending for how weird/bad of a ride it was, there is a part of me that wants more from that fucking universe but like specific parts they never focused on lol.
One example would be the space police lol. There's def parts of Modelland I'd love to know more about just for the morbid curiosity of it all lol.
It reminds me of Asphyxia, a boss from Silent Hill: Homecoming. It’s a monster made of several linked torsos, with arms on each torso, and actually walking on hands.
literally the entire time i was watching the video i was like "why does this book feel so familiar" and you just made me realize its because it has the same batshit overcomplicated ridiculous vibes as jupiter ascending.
That's Tyra Banks though. Her entire body of work is creative but cringe. Watching any episode of top model or the Tyra show will tell you that she's an odd duck
De la cremè = with the cream, it’s used a lot in the names of French cookies with either icing on top or cream inside, also sometimes with the names of coffee or teas that have either cream or vanilla in them.
The main characters name is Tookie, it’s like one letter away from cookie, so her name is basically cookies with cream in English.
Hi I’m Natalie, I possess approximate knowledge of many languages, and this has been *my* TED talk.
Also: "Creme de la creme" is an idiom (either from France or maybe bastardized by English-speaking places) that means "best of the best." So Tookie de la Creme is probably supposed to be like, the absolute best there is among all the other characters, despite having "ugly" traits like being incredibly tall and thin and having effing heterochromia. I'm so confused by what Tyra seems to think makes society think someone is unattractive.
Well, we say “À la crème” rather than “De la crème”. Otherwise you’re right. By the way, my name is Nathalie-Stéfanny. Nice to meet another “Nat”!
all i could think about was the drag queen BenDeLaCreme lmao
That was better then a real TED talk.
@@Arosukir6 Crème de la crème is used in France, it refers to the cream being the best thing you can get from milk, making the crème de la crème the best of the best
These names sound like something a 12 year old on Deviantart came up with, and I say this as someone who used to be on that website at that age and had terribly named OCs and friends with terribly named OCs. We had two ways of naming OCs, overly complicated words no human besides us can pronounce and basic names that have been used about a million times.
Oh god I've been there too. Aka old Sonic OC named Tsunazusuke because I wanted a Japanese name without knowing how Japanese works
And then next to the sonic oc with 5 billion details is a sonic recolor called Greg
@@degeneratemale5386 or in my case, a might as well be sonic with a headband and a dress NATASHA!
You might need to glance at (DO NOT read) Blind Faith by Ben Elton. An awful smug attempt at a dystopian satire where people are called names like Quarterpounder Ipod and Slushy Happymeal. Embarrassing bollocks, in short.
Yepp, it was Sonic OCs for me too. Now I'm overly cautious with my Sonic OCs because I don't want them sounding stupid in universe.
Tyra didn't get into Harvard, and she certainly did not graduate with a business degree. She went to a 6 week seminar that any Tom, Dick, or Harry could go to with enough funds.
You mentioned a couple times that some aspects of the book seem like a subtle critique of the modelling industry, but I think it's worth mentioning that Tyra is one of the people *causing* some of those issues. Those aspects may show up in the book because they just seem... natural to her.
I’m only an hour in, but I feel strangely inspired to write some short stories based on my weirdest thoughts. Since that’s clearly what this lady did lol
Could make for good practice.
Same though lol and who knows what will stick lol gotta throw em at the wall lol
the bad/amazing world building, lost side plots, and strange characterization got me to open up the airtable story bible i have to start adding to it
don't want to become a banks. or do i? i don't know if this thing is amazing or horrifying yet, but it is undeniably aspirational in some way
I’ve seen games that have a similar premise so maybe if you get the chance you could try that out
(The games I’m talking abou are LSD dream emulator, and Yumme Nikki and it’s many fan games)
@@spaceaster Having played OMORI recently, I decided to try Yume Nikki since it served as a huge inspiration... man, did I give up about an hour in.
Every time I heard the name Bravo my mind just pictured Johnny Bravo and every time his lines were on screen I read with his voice in my head
Bizarrely enough, there is actually at least one significant work of literature that does the multiple-self-insert thing: The Picture of Dorian Gray, by Oscar Wilde. Oscar Wilde wrote in his personal correspondence that the character Basil Hallward represents who he really is, Lord Henry Wotton represents who the world at large thinks he is, and Dorian Gray represents who he wishes he could be.
However, Oscar Wilde's characters and plot are rather better thought out than Tyra Banks', to say the least.
The clip of Tyra at the end is honestly painful to watch, because I agree with the message she's apparently trying to convey, that people of all colors, genders, and sizes can be beautiful, but it becomes a somewhat less persuasive message when it's delivered by someone having an emotional meltdown and screaming like a crazed lunatic.
And the fact that she is just
Not really… helping to push the message with her own actions. So it is also just a shallow message.
And Next Top Model really shows how wrong her actions are.
Another self-insert story was Dante's Divine Comedy; where he lauds his own writing style as magnificent and famous amongst other people of note, and people and politicians he didn't like were condemned to hell.
@@bunniesandthorns that was just one self insert, though. OP was specifically talking about multiple self inserts, all in one work,
@@bunniesandthorns I'll never understand how some dude wrote a self insert revenge fantasy, and it somehow became revered as a literary masterpiece.
@@cymond Let's not forget how Inferno reserves a place in hell specifically for people who commit suicide. In the frickin' seventh circle, sharing the same level as people who murder their neighbors or commit bestiality. Super classy guy, that Dante.
Model land could have worked if they built it on the old geisha system in japan. You had an entire prefecture propped on their very existence not because they were special but to make them special. Clothes, beauty treatments, food...etc all to cater to either the geishas or their rich patrons needs. Not because they were beautiful but because they were a status symbol for the patron.
For every example you could use to argue the book has a good message about defying beauty standards, there is an example of the narration bashing people for their looks with seemingly no awareness. A good portion of the book is dedicated to a character who doesn't shave and talking about how ugly and horrible she is until she finally does shave. It's needlessly cruel to an older woman who thought she might be chosen for TDOD. It constantly uses Creamy's wrinkles as a symbol of her awfulness while also mocking her for trying to hide them. The story is about how Modelland needs reform but it portrays the people protesting Modelland as hypocrites who don't actually care about their cause and drop it the second TDOD starts (suggesting a "they're just jealous" attitude towards anyone against the beauty industry).
I disagree with the idea this book is harmless because even aside from the more obviously problematic things (how badly it handles self harm, casual sexism and ableism, racial stereotyping of the Asian characters, etc) it tells the teen girls this is aimed at, and are probably fans of Tyra's, that even in this book about being accepted, they are not acceptable if they don't fit Tyra's idea of beauty
“Wait, so if the magic isn’t responsible for paving the roads and keeping the electricity running, what’s powering the cities?”
“Oh! All of our less attractive men run on giant hamster wheels underground… I’m not really sure how it works…”
Honestly, that sounds like it would be one of the less surreal ideas floating through this novel. At least it's slightly grounded in reality as we know it.
@@alexanderfix3629 Have you actually LOOKED at most of the men running the world?
The funny thing is she ended up on the New York times' bestseller list in the children's literatue category instead the adult novel she was aiming for. Also this is the edited version they had to cut 500-1,000 pages from the manuscript.
I really, REALLY, want to talk to the people who suffered through that manuscript
How did they survive. What was it like.
_CHILDREN?!_
@@errortryagainlater4240 yeah they thought with how fast and whimsical it was there was no question of it being a children's book. Bookstores put it in their kid's section even more after that.
🤣WOOOW just WOW!
@@ayajade6683 there’s things place in the children section that more aimed at older children/teens/young adults like the boy in the striped pyjamas as an example
Masochistic Tango series books best to worst (so far):
11. Modelland
10. Trigger Warning
9. The Mister
8. Handbook for Mortals
7. Twilight: Midnight Sun
6. Ready Player Two
5. Stones to Abigail
4. This is Why I Hate You
3. Reaper's Creek
2. Empress Theresa
1. 64 Squares
No surprise that this Modelland is the best in the series. There's quite a gap between it and Trigger Warning.
(BTW I don't know if I should switch Handbook for Mortals and Midnight Sun or keep it the same)
I will confirm this list as canon, as is.
Oh, come on. Handbook is at lest better than Trigger warning.
@@kayleighbrown459 at least things happen in Trigger Warning.
@@karlispovisils5297 I guess, but is it worth it?
Saving this.
At least to me, it seems like this whole world runs on dream logic, which would be a valid writing style for something as strange as the modeling industry. Unfortunately, I don't think the author was writing it that way intentionally.
Did she just casually include a princess as a main character and give it no fanfare?
Also how is Tookie forgettable? I doubt with looks that unique she’s forgettable.
A heterochromatic omniglot is pretty much as far from a "forgettagirl" as I can possibly imagine.
The ideas in this book seem so surreal to me- honestly, like a Neil Gaiman concept. The plot needs tightening up, and I'm totally unsure if it was what the author was going for, but it all seems bizarre and strangely dark- I feel like I'd kinda dig a stop motion show based from this world, or a cartoon.
It definitely reads like she wants this to be a movie, kinda like Wrinkle in Time
You mean like that weird Mark Twain stop motion movie?
I somehow suspect is just a "this is how my life sucks, in a thin fantasy setting". Its creepily dystopian, and sounds sort of in a way a secret way to vent.
It sounds kind of like the weirdly dark stories I'd write as a kid being stressed out by my home life, so I'm glad I wasn't the only one who thought this.
Another note. The heck is up with all the one off scp monsters in this thing!? Like seriously!? It's some...really cool stuff that gets pushed aside for some stupid and weird shit!
i would read a book about a leg stealing beauty beast
Seriously! It becomes Silent Hill for like one minute and then they're like "huh, that was weird. Anyway it's time for more fashion shenanigans 💅"
45:00
Gonna have to disagree with a one of the "dumb" powers.
"thirty never" is just straight up immortality. Thats not useless thats op as fuck and would guarantee that person position as head of state.
I love your pfp
It's dumb because why wouldn't you just set a single age and stay at that, rather than deal with the agonizing pain of your bones, skin, hair, and organs ungrowing? Growth spurts are bad enough, I don't want to think what it would be like to do that in reverse. I'm only 20, I would not like to have all the changes my body has undergone in the last 3 years overdone overnight
@@filmandfirearms Women usually stop growing two years after menarche, so to go back to 17 only necessitates reversing actual growth if she started her cycle around 15 or 16.
@@YouWillBeHappyOrElse Yes there's no more height growth (usually) but the body still goes through tons of changes and at least me personally, I wouldn't wanna go back to 17/18 and have to go through all of that pain. Cuz there is still pain in developing to full maturity. Breasts can continue to grow into your early twenties and that shit hurts. Nevermind all the mental maturity even going from 18 to 25
The part with the half naked teens reminded me of an episode of America's Next Top Model where Tyra "disciplined" a contestant for not feeling comfortable with doing a nude photo shoot.
Oh no. I haven’t watched the show in years, but looking back, Tyra did push the models’ boundaries regarding nudity. 😬
@@KM-hv1jg what was most aggravating about it is that Tyra would tell the models that you have to be open to it, or you won’t work in the industry. She would literally eliminate contestants for not being comfortable posing nude. But not only did Tyra never pose nude in her entire career, but she actively refused to do so and went on to be a successful model. So she refused to respect their boundaries after demanding that EVERYONE in the industry respect hers.
You did it. By god, man, you did it. I've been begging booktubers to cover this insanity. Thank you so much.
It's what I do, lol
This book reminds me of the Uglies and Pretties books, but with the worldbuilding totally botched. I remember those books being pretty good, they also have a world built around a hierarchy based on beauty standards. The science fiction aspects are pretty cool, and while it might not be a perfect series, it's definitly a better version of this.
I read those books when I was in high school! I remember really enjoying them. They're definitely a better commentary on beauty standards.
I remember those books😜 they’re interesting
Don’t re-read them as an adult. 🤣 They’re okay.
I remember those books! I remember liking them, but being really disappointed with the main character’s willingness to just…go along with what everyone else wants her to do. Like, she got got captured and just…became a Pretty? And I can’t remember how she became a Special but it also just kinda…happened to her?
Which now that I type that, that’s probably a commentary on society forcing women, especially young women, to do and be whatever society wants of them.
That's actually a pretty smart way of going around the dislikes.
I think the biggest problem is that some people are liking it because they like the idea, which kind of muddies the results.
@@J.R.Unbound I think the biggest problem is TH-cam being a pandering piece of shit, which is WHY Krimson had to do this bullshit.
@@J.R.Unbound If this sorta thing becomes commonplace and it loses the novelty, I think it could end up being a semi-useful metric down the line
@@PolarBear0 Hopefully!
You can’t see the comment before clicking on the video so the main purpose of dislikes (seeing the reaction to a video beforehand, if you see a colossal amount of dislikes compared to likes it probably isn’t a good video) doesn’t work here but it’s a nice sentiment. Of course the best option would be for TH-cam to bring the dislikes back because it serves no one to hide them.
I want a dose of whatever Tyra had while writing this book, because it's absolutely bonkers. I don't think she was going for drug-induced visions of a surreal dystopia filled with incoherent nightmare fuel creatures... but for being what it is, it's gold.
I was watching this video when my sister noticed something. There are actually four self-inserts. Zar is also Tyra. She was a mean girl in school, and then once she hit puberty, she became freakishly tall and was bullied for it. The catapiller bus is Tyra's nightmare form.
Another thing my sister noticed. The line when the guy says I don't know which one I like more, your brown eye or your blue eye, is lifted from the Clique series. Tyra worked on the movie adaptation.
My sister thinks Tyra is another person who did not get over being bullied in high school.
my favorite part of Modelland is how obvious it is that Tyra wrote this and not a ghost writer. No one except Tyra has the mental capacity to create something so amazing
Unfortunately it was written by a ghostwriter named Michael Salort.
I truly hope he was paid enough to cover the therapy he would need after bringing to life the insanity Tyra Banks made him write.
@@vidoquen111 Tyra chewed his brain like gum, spat it back into his head, and published the book immediately after
TB when she looks at other women (apparently): Her lips are approximately 3.759 mm too wide and the gap between her eyebrows is .361 mm too close and the tips of her eyes are 1.484 mm too far from the tips of her ears which are 4.192 mm too far from the tip of her chin and . . .
Me: are you ok? Like mentally 🙃
To be fair, she was describing her self-insert. Basically saying Tyra herself is weird looking.
No… no she is not.
@@abbeyBominable123 no she was describing someone else describing her child aged self insert. That’s how she judges others. It’s called projection.
Not even remotely.
6:43 "Tooki lives in a country called Miitopia" That's definitely not how the country was spelled but I don't care, I heard the name and now I'm imagining the protag as a Mii
Same here
That WOULD explain why her eyes are so far apart and why her mouth is so wide
This has way more parallels to Puella Magi Madoka Magica than I was prepared for or am comfortable with. Anyway, quality content as always!
The fashion in Madoka is really awesome! I’m a guy and it gets me geeking out. And then you got the nightmare elements added in…
So yeah, I’m seeing parallels…
Honestly this might be the best YA book ever written because it's not trying to be super serious or edgy, it doesn't pull back on its own ridiculous gore or worldbuilding (or lack thereof) for a young audience, the sexualization of minors is an actual plot point meant as a joke/maybe commentary, it exists solely as a middle aged woman's power fantasy and was actually marketed and sold as such, and none of it means anything. It's just fucking hilarious. I've never heard of a book that just completely doesn't try to be what it's not and has so much fun lavishing in its own awfulness. Watching this video is honestly inspiring me to start writing again I can't believe this
YA before 2000 wasn't actually terrible. It's when it exploded as a genre it became trash.
About the two self-inserts, I don't think that having multiple self-inserts of 1 person is a bad thing, but it needs to be handled well - a good example is The Picture of Dorian Gray, in which the titular Dorian, Basil and Henry and all inserts for Oscar Wilde, the author. Main difference is that Wilde makes them into avatars representing different aspects of himself and toys with perception, which is a recurring theme in the novel - "Basil Hallward is what I think I am; Lord Henry what the world thinks me; Dorian what I would like to be in other ages, perhaps."
Cool
The best example of multiple author self-inserts is, of course, Trapped In a Island with Josh Hutcherson.
I now feel better about literally every character I've given a name to
*Creamy.
Mad respect that you're still open to criticism. This is why I remain subscribed.
It's one of the best tools writers can ask for.
This book at times feels like a fashion-conscious Alice in Wonderland... Nothing makes sense, there are storylines and characters created and abandoned randomly, and I never know whether I am amused or annoyed by the weirdness
Okay but “Silent Protest by Laying Down” is an unironically hilarious bit
"Hey, we live in SansColor. What does that mean?"
"Oh, it means 'without color.'"
"...Then why is our language Colorian?"
"I don't know, what's a color?"
Sans 😂 undertale
Long have I awaited the return of the one they call 'The Krimson Rogue'... It has been worth it.
It made the whole Autism-Community proud, so i hope you have all seen Hbomberguys Newest Video,
as it was partially about Autism.
If you didnt knew that guy, please see this comment as my christmas-gift to you.
Modelland reminds me of the villain's weird Wonka-esque factory in Spy Kids. I feel like Tyra was channeling that very 90's kids movie vibe when describing it.
And Ci-L really feels like a Tyra insert, a total Mary Sue who is single-handedly fighting the good fight against the narrow idea of beauty and lifting her poor, less fortunate lessers up from obscurity through her magnanimous generosity of spirit and being punished for it.
Ever since I first heard of Modelland through your review, I haven't been able to stop thinking about "Multiple Personality Disorder Hair." It's just such a hilariously tone-deaf phrase that it'll probably never leave my mind.
When TH-cam recommended a 3 hour long video about a book with a name as ridiculous as Modelland.... I certainly didn't think I'd be here at the end, thoroughly entertained, amused, incredulous, aghast, confounded, impressed and dismayed.
Very well done - thank you! 🙏
As someone regularly called "C.L." due to my initials I'm having horrible secondhand embarrassment from this written soap opera.🤦♀️
I mean...you have the kpop queen to lean on so...hope?
@@queenash96 True...
I actually thought it was an edgy spelling or play on the French word 'le ciel' - heaven, only because of how much French she put in the book, and how that would fit with the book's weirdarse world generally (just a theory though!)
@@eatdrinkstagger i think it _is_ a joke / pun on ciel lol
@@eatdrinkstagger because of this, my language uses ciel as a name for sky blue, and if you think of it that way it's a very nice name
3 hours?! Heck yeah I will try and watch it in one sitting. More than once.
Good luck, even I would have trouble with that, lol
@@KrimsonRogue Your videos are the best to listen to while working!
@@KrimsonRogue And I failed. Hard.
@@KrimsonRogue It helps when you watch it at work while doing dull tasks that don't require much focus. Thanks for helping with that. Krimson! 🙂
within the fashion world, being able to 100% accurately predict the next years trends is incredibly useful since coming up with the ideas can start up to 2 years beforehand and gathering materials for production happens a year before!!!
I’m sure it’s been said somewhere in the comments section (or maybe not idk), but the differences between Rookie’s flashback and the other two girls’ flashbacks could have been an interesting character moment for Tookie if it had been explored more. Perhaps others would view it as a happy memory, but it could actually be something painful for Tookie to think about considering since her parents were showing complete favoritism to “Miracle”. When we meet the parents, we see that they treat Tookie like shit, yet in the flashback they are shown as being loving towards her like regular parents.
My guess is that essentially Tookie and her parents are happy together (and Tookie is even excited to get a little sibling/sister), but then “Miracle” is born and the parents completely drop their love for Tookie for it to go towards “Miracle” only.
Either that or “Miracle” started showing some modeling talent early on and the parents completely hyperfocused on that like irl parents do to vicariously live through their children. So perhaps Tookie is shown a “happy” flashback because her traumatic experience is that her parents don’t actually love her as they used to.
Buuuut I’m probably reading too deeply into things considering it sounds like it isn’t explored in the moment after being shown, which would have been the best time for it and for Tookie to reflect on how her family had been treating her for presumably years.
Wait... They synced up their periods in order to train them to endure pain for the sake of professionalism, and to make their time management reliable... but also made it the last period so they would never have to worry about it again?
Adding this to my “So long I can use it to sleep to” playlist. But seriously, love the length of the video.
I do this too 🤣
Same. Some how I fall asleep to Krim ranting. 😅 But it takes me a few nights to watch it. Stretches it out.
I saw the title and I was like “oh that’s dumb, whatever.” Then I saw it was written by Queen of Crazy herself, and I said “oh fuck.”
Can I ask who this Tyra Banks is and why she's crazy? I'm from the UK and I've never heard of her before.
@@thewafflebat3722 She can get very emotional and rude about modeling
@@helloill672 Ah, okay, thanks!
@@thewafflebat3722 she was one of the top fashion models out of the 90s. Along with Kate Moss, Naomi Campbell, Heidi Klum, Cindy Crawford, etc. Shit, Naomi would cut a bitch. Like their names were as big as those in acting back then. I don't even know who the top tier models are nowadays, but you couldn't escape these names in the day.
@@thewafflebat3722 She's one of the main...like...people when it comes to American Idol. She is very manipulative and verbally abusive (I think physically as well) to the models themselves. Not a nice woman 🙄
I have absolutely fallen in love with your longform reviews, and seeing this video was 3 hours long got me HYPED! These have become my motivational podcasts for writing my own works, and I hope you keep them coming!
I got plenty more where this came from, don't you worry about that!
Only 45 min in, but "ThirtyNever" as they call it, actually sounds pretty badass. It sounds like immortality.
Ngl your thirties are probably the best age to be stuck in as an immortal. If you're stuck in a body that's _too_ young, nobody would ever take you seriously.
@@errortryagainlater4240 the way I understood ThirtyNever is once you hit 30 your body reverts to 18 and starts aging again to 30 in a never-ending cycle. That’s why it’s called “thirty never” lol
It's the worst version of immortality. You're perpetually stuck shifting between full maturity and your late teens
It sounds like a form of Immortality that would be given as a punishment