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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ก.ย. 2024
- Avoidant personality disorder also abbreviated as AVPD is a type of personality disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (Fifth Edition) (DSM-V). This disorder is characterized by patterns of social withdrawal, inadequacy, and fear of criticism. We made this video to shed some light on the surface of this personality disorder.
Also, we've previously made a video on the signs someone has an Avoidant Attachment Style if you want to check that out: • 8 Signs of an Avoidant...
Disclaimer: Do not use this video to self diagnose!
If you want to support Psych2Go, check out our Patreon:
/ psych2gomagazine
#psych2go #avoidant #avpd
Writer: Monica Taing
Script Editor: Isadora Ho
Script Manager: Kelly Soong
VO: Amanda Silvera
Animator: Deanca Rensyta Mihardja
TH-cam Manager: Cindy Cheong
References
American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (DSM-5®). American Psychiatric Pub.
Robitz, R. (2018, November). What are Personality Disorders? Retrieved June 06, 2020, from www.psychiatry...
Happy Saturday everyone! What are your plans for the weekend? And how are you liking this week's video posting?
Ok
Thx
Your videos have been great
But , in here is sunday
Hai Psych2go!! Happy Saturday and happy August!!! I am planning on going camping this coming week! This video is amazing as always and so are you guys! ♡
This leaf guy is really going through a lot.
And I thought my life was hard
We know! That's why we want to make a plush available again to commemorate it. Hugging it will improve it's mood 200%
@@Psych2go hey go for it!
That moment when so many plushies gets sold and hugged that he will overflow with happiness, and will be unable to look sad.
All future videos will be "how to deal with chronic happiness. Also, look at this cute rock I found"
He basically has every mental disorder ever lmao
Psych2Go please make a plush it would be so cute and I would 100% buy it
The way I saw people berated, humiliated and shunned in high school it's no wonder some grew up with this disorder.They end up covering up like a dog who's been beat too much.
Yep. That is partly my issue, even in my 40s I’m still affected by how i was made fun of in school and judged and cut down. Being a “highly sensitive person” only made it worse, i think. I’m still trying to forgive those people and get over it
tall32guy forgive yourself that’s all you need to do. What other people think of you doesn’t matter. But if you internalize the things they say it’s up to you to strengthen your self confidence to the point where criticism doesn’t make you mad
"till you spend half your just a-cov'ring up now" On point!
even bullies get abused. everyone gets bullied or feels lost and disillusioned at some point. these are the constants of life. to let this hold you back from all the happinesses of life is to give up your hope. you have to suffer and face your fears, in order to build a life that is beautiful and valuable. pick yourself up, forgive yourself for the evils others have done to you. love yourself and keep struggling for the dream life you wish you could have.
Thanks to my mother, and my golden siblings :0!!!
Avoidant personality disorder-
•fear of criticism
•Inadequacy
•Social withdrawal
Sounds just like someone with anxiety
Why can I relate to all these
@Fabi's World because they make people believe if they aren't just like them there is something wrong with you and there isn't everyone is an individual therefore different so 1 nobody should critisize them for it and 2 it actually is normal to be different than others and the disorder is with the ones that think you should be just like everyone else
Blounem This is so wrong I can’t even understand how you came up with this. Anxiety is immense fear, apd is avoiding social situations do to repetitive negative experiences, but without the actual primitiv unlogical fear of anxiety. Anxiety on the other hand is simply way more than avoiding. Do some research m8
Yandere dev has some of these
I repeatedly was in a situation where I thought I was a part of a group only to discover that the rest have their own private chat, hang out together or something along those lines and don't include me. Like, for example, all the girls in a class go together to see a movie and only later I hear them talk about it. All the girls minus one. My mind goes blank and I think: "Oh."
Sometimes people aren't even meanspirited, they enjoy each other's company and good for them. It's just that I happen not to be that company. It can feel even worse to realise that you weren't ignored on purpose but just weren't even considered in the first place. And it would be fine to just ask to join because there might be no ill intent behind such a situation. It's probably those feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem whispering in my ear. But the same things come to mind: _you don't belong, you're boring, you're not like them, they're not like you, it makes no difference whether you're there or not._
I truly admire people who relentlessly put themselves out there. So much courage. I feel like I'm whining and playing a victim more times than I care to admit. How much of what I feel is just a result of my jumping to conclusions and fear of being rejected? Can I even read social cues anymore? Learning to feel good while being alone is a great skill to have anyway.
This is exactly how I feel....
This is exactly how I feel....
Me too, I've been rejected everywhere I ever went. Always had to eat lunch alone, do everything alone. You'd think I had nasty warts on my face or something. Not sure but I was moved to different schools almost every year, circumstances caused me to be in different jobs, different states so I was always the outsider. I don't care any more, I've gotten used to it. Actually I'm very independent and self-sufficient now.
a better group of people will find you and welcome and accept you :) eff those girls who cares about other people rejecting - as long as you don’t reject yourself!
"The rest have their own private chats" except me. That's so relatable. I really want to meet people with similar problem may be just to feel not left out.
Me: I'll try to socialize more and be more confident.
Other people around me : interrupts and ignores me.
Me: and they ask why I wanna leave and being alone?
Ikr
me: is it really a disorder, or just an intelligent person avoiding further abuse?
Yes. It's very tough to find good people. But by now I'd rather take the risk. Better than living life in a prison cell you created yourself.
you shouldn't see interruption as abuse. these are a result of you feeling sensitive to a perceived attack. you have to filter out the noise, otherwise you will lose your mind in the 1000s of things that happen in the course of a completely harmless interaction. maybe they grew up with many siblings in a house full of constant bustling life and noise. be compassionate to yourself and forgive yourself as well as others.
@@roxyndra yeah same question 🙋
It's "funny" this is recommended to me today. I had came to the realization that I avoid social interactions because it "feels better" to simply avoid people/social interaction because if I don't engage at all I don't have to worry about people ghosting me or fearing that I might say the wrong thing.
I feel the same way 💟 I never give them the chance
Me too...
That is really dumb
@@redfather5342 how so?
same
I just hate how people seem so shallow, I just want someone who seems to think deeper
Facts
You sound like an introvert in need of deeper connections with people.
YES Exactly what I am thinking
Then think deep and never talk. How deep is deep. People who think too deep kill themselves sometimes.
I felt like this my entire life and I didn't know this was a thing, I can't self diagnose myself but I'm relieved to see that other people feel this way and that I'm not alone in this
Isn't this caused by trauma the person has suffered in the past, mostly from relationships?
From their early life experience
That’s a great question! Aren’t most personality disorders caused by trauma from early childhood?
Yes It can develop at any moment in our lives.
The gravity of the disorder depends on the type of trauma/experience we encountered. But it can be treated/healed since it's not a genetic disorder, but more a psychological defense mechanism.
Eva V excellent information! Thank you!
In my case, yes
I have avoidant personality disorder with traits of borderline personality disorder but I can definitely say that 5 years of therapy helped A LOT, I still have that voice in my head going "you're not doing enough" "you're not as good at this as someone else will be" "your opinion isn't as important" etc but I tell myself I am and I am definitely feeling much much better, sometimes I literally cry when I fail at something but instead of running away I just try to be as open as possible and set clear boundaries. Good luck everyone!
this sounds more like imposter syndrome rather than avpd but i am no professional
@@ghostbuster.. I have the official diagnosis of avoidant pd, very preoccupied of what others think of me and always think it's negative and heavy fear of rejection with a lot of isolation, rather not do something because I fear I will fail and people will laugh at me etc but yea imposter syndrome and avoidant pd have some overlap, the difference is that with personality disorders is that there is a clear long on going pattern of the same behaviour if someone only sometimes or in 1 specific area of their live experiences this it is not necessarily a personality disorder, I would not go to school because I got bullied and laughed at, I would not go to work for the same fear of it, I am very distant in close relationships for the same fear, I have difficulty openly talking to someone unless I believe they like me, which might seem contradicting because I share all this but there are so many times I type something and then delete it again because I fear someone's reaction, it is getting better though but small steps.
@@letsplayg I see. I'm really sorry that you have to go through such thing and i completely understand as I've also had it my entire life but it's never taken srsly and nobody understands,,i hope it's okay to ask but how do you deal with it? even if it's just small steps i would still like to know,,
@@ghostbuster.. My next comment is very long so it's ok if you don't read it, Thank you for your compassion.
What helps me is accepting that mistakes are ok, cognitive thinking: if someone laughs at me it says more about them than me, when stuck in negative thinking realise that even if it's all true constantly obsessing about it isn't gonna get you anywhere, when you recognize a pattern try to do the opposite of what you feel, expose yourself to rejection and sit with the feelings and be kind to yourself but realise you're not a victim or inadequate, the more you feel triggered the more you should try to deal with it right away: if you cry at work and feel so ashamed instead of not going, keep going, ask for help and express your emotions, escapism is good but don't lose grip on reality, you might have different views and that is good but reality is different: example you have been through a lot so it is understandable you struggle but only with hard work will you get rewards just like anyone if you want money you need to work, if you want connection you need to be more open, don't expect special treatment and realize avoiding is not healthy even though it is what feels best, face problems head on even if it makes you extremely uncomfortable, lots of people don't truly know what they are doing it is normal, acknowledge that inner critic and tell it that it's not true, do acts of service and express gratitude, realize that people their intentions often aren't to hurt you but to help you and most importantly take your time it might take you years to break this and change but you can only change yourself not others an exercise I had to do at therapy was ask 10 people what they thought about me and this was scary but in my head it was way more negative than they said, reality was some saw me as kind and others wouldn't be friends but felt indifferent, I got/get judged for being weird the instant people see me and I always thought it was my fault but what were they judging on? I am definitely weird though but is that a negative character trait? Someone who disliked me at therapy based on my sexuality/looks (gay) actually got to know me and realised we were way more alike than he thought. Hope this somewhat helps.
The worst part is that when you try to come out of your shell, you will draw people who will make you feel inadequate and discard you, bcs you unconsciously continue pattern from early childhood. So better just avoid again 😔
@Joan Hackett Fan Stand up to the hammer hitting you and they come back with an anvil.
true true
If they discard you that ez, it means you are nothing to them. You might be wishful thinking they r your friends but in reality, they barely know you. It takes time to develop relationships. So fake friends is like no friends. And you don't need them.
My sister is psychology student and she say i has "personality disorder" and after i watch this video, I already confirmed that my sister assumption about me is true. 🙂
How did you convince your parents to see a psychiatrist?
Wrong what they calls disorder is just you not being some cookie cutout of what they think you should be but you are an individual not a clone of everyone else you don't have a disorder because you aren't like them IDC if your sister is a phsyh whatever
ItzNova Dimension
You want advice? Don’t wait for your „parents“ to allow you to seek help, but do it with someone you trust so you don’t end up tricked by disgusting maggots that seem like human
@@lexmortis5722 I dont know I don't want them to make fun of me because I ask if I could go see a psychiatrist, so I think I am just not going to say anything and move on I guess
ItzNova Dimension
Nononononononononononono. I have apd and bpd, DONT suffer in silence, those who laugh are nothing than ignorant maggots that should get stomped. Please, I beg you, talk to a doc, they won’t laugh at you and if they do, you can sue them for it. Please don’t just ignore it like me. I am on the verge of killing myself because I opened up to late. Don’t wait, it is important, even if you think it is not. I will checkin in a week and ask you if you did it if you want to :)
I personally just feel the most comfortable when I'm alone. People stress me out.
This is literally me that you so much for this video you have no idea
Hope this video helped!
You don't have a disorder the disorder is them trying to make you like everyone else be an individual don't be like everyone else there is nothing wrong with you the problem is with the ones who tell you how they think you should be and telling you you're not normal and therefore have a disorder
@@TH-camforcedmetochangemyname Can you write with punctuation, please? I can't understand whatever you're trying type and your sentences are so jumbled its irritating.
Might not wanna identify with the disorder.
Why do people overuse the word "literally"? 😒
I literally just got ghosted by someone who is avoidant, things were really good between us but he just suddenly stopped talking to me. I guess I should have seen it coming and I shouldn’t be mad at him.
Best you can do is to be epically patient with them :) The Avoidant won't ghost you when they feel 100% safe around you. With my best friend it took me 3 months to feel that way about him, and now we've been solid friends for 8 years. He means the world to me, so unless your friend really doesn't want you in their life (which is sometimes the case for any human), I say go easy on them, DON'T pressure them to come out, let them do things at their exact pace and you may have a friend for life who will be eternally grateful to you 💗
@@whitewitch44 Will do! Thanks for the advice :)
it used to upset me every time he insulted me like that, i was scared to speak to him again because of it
I got ghosted by someone who I had previously helped.
I’m an avoidant, we do fear happiness quite a lot and due to our low self esteem, we believe we aren’t worthy for potential love partners. He probably was paranoid that you didn’t like him.
...I'm just tired of being hurt. I'm tired of not adding up to family.
dude i always thought i was just extremely shy around people i dont know. but every single point of this fits, never even been close to an intimate relationship, because i dont let it happen, only have like 2 friends and never talk to anyone else if not needed and ferel like im worth less than everyone else. might need to see a doctor..
what do u do in ur free time? jus wondering, because as an alone hermit who jus play videos games n watch youtube... im starting to get bored
really bored
thank you very much!!! this personality disorder is very little spoken!! im going to send this to everyone I like and love ❤
Did anyone else stop caring about making friends?
i'm positive I have this. this describes me completely. at first I thought I may have social anxiety, but honestly this is what accurately describes what i go through on a day to day basis. I cut off all my friends and I'm hyper sensitive to criticism to where I don't attempt to make friends. I also don't go out at all and I show the other traits of this disorder.
'who constantly feels inadequate, is hypersensitive to criticism, and avoids social interactions.'
*ah. i see. you have described me exactly.*
Actually you psy2go team are the best!
Every time I watch one of your videos,my anxiety gets lower & lower
why are people expectant of me and my behavior in the first place? I'm considered unique to me, so how can anyone else tell me I have an avoidant personality disorder of any kind? Who decides what is normal today? Have you seen society?
I'm pretty sure I have this. I always cried in childhood, especially when I started school. I couldn't contain it. I then would constantly have fear working and having a boss. I now clean houses and make jewelry. I have my own business but lately some of the clients have been offending me and causing me tons of anxiety too. It sucks to always be anxious and paranoid about what other people think of you.
Pretty sure this is me to a tee, yet my work as a tour guide brings out my outgoing, confident side. There are times when I am so outgoing, I can't believe it's me!
And yet, I decline get togethers, parties, ect. because I don't want to spend all night making small talk with strangers.
Amazing uploads as always. As someone wanting to go into psychology (primarily some form of therapy) your content is always amazing to help me understand what I feel myself and how others feel. Much love from SA 🖤
Being alone by choice is not loneliness. For me, it's avoiding boredom and BS from others. Loneliness is having a lack of purpose, and I never feel lonely. I value my quiet time and space in an ever-increasing insane and yet mundane world.
However, I do feel for those who are doing the opposite by trying to engage with others and yet are fearful about being in social situations or feel insecure about themselves. Maybe it's just a phase. Maybe it's an actual mental/emotional issue there with longterm effects. Some people also need to get out there more often. Everybody's got something to deal with, one way or another. That's how life is.
This video was really very helpful. You all help me know myself better. Can you suggest some methods of getting over or coping up with disorders. It will be a great help. Thank you again♥️♥️♥️
Only years of therapy. Nothing else helps, most things make it simply worse.
@@lexmortis5722 very true indeed
@dimorlote Thumbs up
I wonder if you could do a video on how avoidant personality disorder is different from social anxiety disorder.
I have this for basically my whole life, at least since I started thinking. I don't know where it's coming from and was diagnosed with it 10 years ago.
It affects every freakin day. It involves not answering phone calls, text chats, letters, or literally any form of contact. It prevents me from going to a restaurant, cinema, barber, clubs, parties, basically every situation a normal person wouldn't even think about, that it could be a very difficult task for someone with APD.
I have some other illnesses too, mental and physical, but this one is *by far the worst* of them all.
The only real refuge I have is the internet. All my internet friends share at least 1 interest, that 1 thing we have in common makes me feel completely comfortable around them.
Even when I meet them in real life, which luckily happened quite a lot and are the best memories I have. And with these people it's MUCH easier to go outside and participate at certain "normal" events, like drinking in a bar. With other people it's basically impossible.
tl;dr: fck life
This sounds like me. I don't even want to go to a family gathering on Christmas! I just feel to self conscious and nobody understands it :(
Some people have gone through so much and been physically, emotionally and mentally scarred, they just may feel it’s too late for them and have resigned to the fact they’ll always be alone.
I was diagnosed yesterday, quite surprised I have never heard of it before.
It sucks to know how my friends are feeling rn, like I avoid them with no explanation. I know they feel like I don't like them but the thing is I'm just tired. I tried to be there but it's hard to catch up. They're having fun rn, voice calling and playing games. I saw the groupchat's notifications and it hurts ,, I can join them rn if I want to (which I do) but something is stopping me. I hate this feeling.. I've been trying to get out of this phase for 2 years straight, I just wanna go back to my normal self. I used to be the loudest in the room now it's just like I'm there to tell them I exist, not live.
don't get me wrong, my friends do check up on me but I push them away. I can't tell them how I exactly feel like though I really want to. I know they'll get tired of me in the end and drop me, that's fine cuz I'm used to it.
I think I need a change but idk how to.. at this point I just wanna run away from everything and change my identity and looks so nobody knows who I am .
But I've existed. I've come into my family and friends' lives, there's no way I can erase their memories and for them to act like I don't exist. That's the only reason why I'm still alive rn, I don't wanna hurt them. It hurts me more to see people being hurt by me heh
@Λίνα Μοργκάνα yea lol I just feel distant
@@cheez8813 man this disorder is so fucked up, makes you a goddamn lifeless zombie🗿
I just wanna 'live' in the woods or someshit I don't fuckin know anymore
When you have weird looking eyes and mostly blind you can appear awkward. Therefore rejection is a reality. I've been told I'm shady creepy dangerous on drugs etc all because my eyes look different. Be nice if you could address mental difficulties that coincide with an invisible disability
That must be hard enough as it is let alone enduring judgment and criticisms from cruel and such simple minded people. If you read this I hope you have a wonderful day ☺️🌻
I have moments like this but more like my eyes make people shake in fear because of my glare 🥲 or if I’m thinking
Get yourself a cool looking pair of sunglasses and wear them all the time if you must. More importantly you should go to doctors until you find out why your eyes look weird. You may have Graves Disease. I have it and I find not many doctors can treat it. Do your own thing and enjoy what you like to do, ignore the unfriendly people.
Honestly, if criticisms come from people who don't know more than us but insist on one-upmanship, why waste time on them ?
I would like to see Mixed Anxiety-Depressive Disorder (MADD) I struggle with it so I want to see your opinion/ facts or whatever about it.
google
I struggle with it too.
I don’t really know if I have APD, since I am scared to tell my parents to meet a physiologist because they aren’t very compressive :/, sometimes I want to meet new people but I feel fear of being rejected, even with my close friends sometimes this happens too, anyways thank you for the video!
I don't have a fear of criticism or rejection. I have a fear of people harming me because of past traumatic relationships. Now I can't trust anyone or maintain relationships, or even leave my house other to go to work. The self imposed isolation and fear of intimate relationships hits the same.
This isnt me usually but for some reason I’m like this during the pandemic yikes
I feel like I have every kind of personality disorders I've ever watched
I don't like people talking and asking about me. I don't know if its wrong or not but I just don't like other people to know about me or what am I doing. Because I know they'll be only talking about me and I just want to have a peaceful life.
Actually i'm scared why most of your content relateable
I'm mean i'm kinda skeptic but this is like me most of all time
When i do something bad , i'm avoid my groups , it's not like i hated them , because i'm afraid. i'm just realize this lately from the past of my choices likely because i'm afraid being judged and failure
I'm also quit some online group if i make a mistake on there , not because i want to seek attention , it just bugged me to stay on that group
And i had a very bad trust issues , and that also somehow affect my self esteem , i always wonder how people can be very confident and never asked theyselve is they act may had any consequences or failed.
Well nice video btw
Wow that's me!!! However, I don't feel my social avoidance causes me any stress. I feel completely fine with my own company. I don't feel I'm missing out or lacking anything. I don't feel it's a disorder because it doesn't make me feel bad
I have a question, is APD similar to anxiety? I just want to ask Since some of the symptoms are similar to each other
By the way, I really love your channel! I really wanted to learn more about psychology since i wanna be there for others and for myself. This channel really helped me learn more about it and made it easier for me to understand!
No but there's a co morbidity with anxiety and depression
No these are distinct clinical disorders. There are similar symptoms though, which is why some people with APD may also have problems with anxiety - something called "comorbidity" as Xorrin mentioned.
-i wish i knew
Xorrin thanks for the information!
I wish I knew thank you also for the information!
Apd doesn’t contain immense unlogical fear like anxiety, anxiety is way more than „just“ avoiding all social interactions. Very very very very very different.
Yeah and when I withdraw I realize that no one really cares or wants me, it's like I am invisible so it doesn't matter if I am replaced.
I feel like a ghost. If I committed suicide, almost nobody would care/know
I remember being a social butterfly and loving people and always being able to make friends when I was young until some supposed friends started pointing out my flaws. Then I started thinking about myself more and more. I was also teased relentlessly in school by students older and younger than me. I was the brunt of jokes. I felt humiliated. And that person I once was just died. I can't believe how far I've regressed. Sometimes I wonder how life could have been different had my circumstances been a little different. Now I'm just a sad lonely broken-hearted person trying to keep it together
So realistic 😍
Huge fan !!❤❤❤!!
Thank you! Was this topic what you were looking for?
@@Psych2go Yes.
I was not having this problem but i looking for it because if it happened then what.
So tysm 😘❤
Hi! (TLDR: this is the summary) This year is just kind of very tough for me. It's not like I miss socializing with people, rather I'm putting up my defenses and ignoring my friends and colleagues and preventing them from contacting me in any way so I won't be obligated to tell them anything and just speak up when things are better. Is what I'm doing okay? I dont want to come off rude but any new message stresses me out..
Part of me is really okay with telling the truth, but I'd really rather avoid everything altogether. I don't want to make a big fuss abt this or to make people feel pity for me or whatnot. I get that they may worry about me but I do plan to get back to them when my "situation" isnt as worse. I'm really not fond of rumors and word may spread around. I just want a peaceful life. You cant really tell if a person's genuinely worried about you or just curious enough to get the tea out of you for them to spread around chatrooms. I've been doing this for quite some time now. I'm kinda guilty that I'm basically just ghosting everyone but it really makes me anxious everyday thinking of what to reply to them if and when they contact me. I'm writing this in hopes of someone answering if what I'm doing is okay or smth. Thanks for your time!
You have improved your voice a bit, good! The change is much better for the video.
Closed captions “hey psycho family” well... it’s not wrong lol
"You should not try to diagnose yourself ", well since the doctors can't spend the time to talk to you to make a diagnosis you really don't have much choice. Around here, you get waitlisted to try to see a psychiatrist.
I've been humiliated, lied upon, harshly criticized and judged by friends and family, and betrayed....I moved to another town changed my number and I nowadays keep to myself most times, I'm anxious to talk to people or meet new friends and I've come to settle with the idea that I'll probably be single for the rest of my life... I wish someone could give me a hug but the thought of someone else in my personal and mental space just irks me... I don't feel lonely and love that I don't have to deal with people who'll end up hurting me anyway,,, I'll probably die alone and that's okay, it'll hurt less I guess
Tbh this is exactly me though I haven’t been diagnosed for this yet. Should I bring this up with my therapist?
Yes, I was diagnosed with apd and bpd, bring it up if it concerns you :)
I know I’m not supposed to self-diagnose, but this video just perfectly described me. I grew up in the country and went to school in a very small town. I lost all my friends in Jr. High when I was no longer “cool”. Mostly due to the fact that I didn’t enjoy sports and wasn’t a good athlete. In rural America, athleticism is the measure by which you are judged. I was accused of being “gay” (I’m not), and ruthlessly bullied and teased. It is something that has stuck with me to this day. I still live in the community, and run my family farm, but I have very little interaction with people except those I absolutely need to interact with for business. I’m used to it by now, so I guess it will never change.
I'm not even gonna try anymore. I've never had friends in my whole 15 years of life. Neither do i have the skills to get any, neither do i have any kind of self-worth
I had an ADP friend and I loved real like really so much. But she hurt me constantly and kept apologizing without changing her behavior. It made me suffer for 2 whole years being put into this anxious avoidant loop. She pulled away from me and cut contact. But I visited her university to talk to her. And I criticized her and told her that she hurt me lots and that I got advice from all my friends and therapist that she isn't good for me. She blocked me later on from every single platform on earth. And I feel so anxious and I'm losing my mind. I didnt mean to make her feel like she's a burden or inadequate. I never meant to make her feel like that at all. (note: she made it clear that she doesnt love me back, but her actions seemed to say otherwise, she was still intimate and so close to me even tho she didn't love me) (and yes she had her episodes of completely avoiding me and running away and coming back again for intimacy and support) what should I do?
I didn't know there was a disorder like this. I guess Im an introvert and APD? In my family I can only talk to my lil sis about anything. I used to be able to talk to my parents but it stopped when I got pressured and depressed about a problem. As for my older brother, I can only say a few things because he gets pissed really easily. Im glad I have a lil sis to talk about things.. but shes getting older (11) I noticed she doesn't listen anymore and gets pissed all the time when i ask for her attention. We used to be reaally close 🥺 Im 21 btw
After years of horrendous up bringing, there is no light at the end of the tunnel. We’re stuck with this outlook.
I got diagnosed with APD after speaking to my phycologist for a few sessions. I'm almost 40, but it feels good to finally have a name for the thing I've been struggling with for so long. APD requires long term treatment, but he's confident that we can make progress.
Please don't wait as long as I did to find help. Go talk to your GP, go talk to a professional.
And the worst thing is that they notice but thinks that that is your personality so instead of trying to talk to you they wouldn't make an effort to approach or reach you. I don't even have a single person from one of my relatives and siblings that I can comfortably talk with because of it and our distance made it worst. I cant strike up a continuous conversation so it always ends up being awkward, this is how I try to socialize with them but they simply show no interest. It's like you're drowning but no one cares--- and it seems like this is the only place where you can speak out your mind and find people who you can relate with☹
For everyone suffering from this know that it’s possible to change.
I have been diagnosed with this and I hate myself for being what I am.
I go on Omegle to talk to strangers when I'm feeling lonely, it's less stressful and i can be myself without the fear of any judgement because i won't be meeting them ever again
First time i feel so much called out that i almost fled from the video which ironically fits the topic
the root cause is usually your childhood and your parents
And the worst thing is that nobody understands what a person goes through if they have such kind of fears along with anxiety when trying to socialize. Everyone just assumes us to be shy,timid, silent, introverted etc when there's literally a war going on inside about why it's so difficult to perform such a simple task like socializing.
Spiritually Soothing' Her Voice is' in this very informative video' ✨
This just help me learn so much about myself
I like being independent, doing everything by myself, talking to my stuffed animals because you know why!?
Cause I has APD (๑^᎑^๑)
It's a relief for me to have a few fellow APD friends in my class. It'd be a disaster if they weren't there at all like I'd avoid college. Being judged can be so exhausting and the pricks don't know what they're causing at all.. worst is that when your parents force you to socialize or judge you for not bringing any friends or having a girlfriend. I hope to get help soon cuz it's really hard living like this
Love your voice. Makes me cry instantly , cos I dont have anyone to tell how is feel or am not allowed to feel
since i was a kid, i used to self isolate a lot (still the same now). and i can't stand being with a group of friends for long hours so i'd make excuses to escape. i'm not good with criticism because i get so awkward (can't control it and feel like crying sometimes). definitely have low self esteem since forever and social withdrawal symptoms too. and the best part is that i'm the kind who prefers a two person relationship so it's highly likely that the person i fall in love with will be that same person.
I think I have APD because I cant eat lunch in a crowded room with co-workers because its overwhelming, and if i get even little criticisms from my boss ill feel like a total failure and cry all day. I just dont have the money to get diagnosed again I already got pinned as major depressive and severe anxiety
That sounds a lot like ptsd/cptsd
This video is made about me, everything in this video is so true my god.
ruin my life so much 😭😭😭
What's the difference between Avoidant Pers. Disorder and Social Anxiety?... It seems very similar to me. I definitely have both.
Wow, I’ve always wondered why I have never been in a relationship… this connects all the dots.
please consider making a video about the differences between personality disorders (i.e. borderline personality disorder), mental disorders (i.e. bipolar) and mental disabilities (learning - i.e. dyslexia), thanks.
I rather be alone than with a group of people that make you feel Alone.
Wow this is how I’ve been since childhood. This APD it fascinates me. Is it a chemical imbalances ? I know most mental disorders can be caused by a number of things.
Hardest thing is that people don't care about you. They think that you are "weirdo" or something like that. I am ashamed of myself. I can socialize with strangers online but not IRL. I had a lot of bad things in the past which made me to become same. I am 16 years old. I am for long time in depression, anxiety and panic attack. I had HOCD (Homosexual Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - fear of being gay it's like you know that you are straight but you are in fear of being gay. If you have this don't worry you won't be gay it's just fear). APD destroyed my life. People who hated me in the middle school destroyed my life. I destroyed it too. And i don't know how i will get out of it. I was extremely social person. I always wanted friends. But no one normal wanted to have friend like me. I am always feeling lonely, i never had gf, and i have one friend who don't go in same high school as me and we don't see each other a lot. If someone wants to ask me anything about my story and how i became "weirdo" feel freely to contact me. When someone answers this comment I am gonna share my insta. And if someone HAD this PLEASE help me!
I wouldn't say I have APD But I do recognize it traits realizing my avoidant attachment style due to early upbringing that has effected my life and relationships at certain moments
What is the diagnosis when you love criticism and love to be hated? Non human?
I need to see a professional about this and other things but I have no money🤦🏻 I can relate so much to this video. I hate it. Even in games I get self conscious and feel embarrassed to play with others in fear that I’ll mess up and they’ll judge me. Even when no one knows who I am, I can’t get over the anxiousness it makes me feel. Even messaging my friends makes me anxious. I make plans and then get scared when the day comes to hang out with them. I’ve missed a lot of great and fun things because of my fear. I regret so many moments in life because of it. I don’t know how to overcome it.
My parents (especially my mom) are pretty pushy when it comes to socializing and making friends, but I have a very hard time making friends because of my anxiety from bad experiences with friends in the past. I really only have one IRL friend who’s not family (we don’t see each other often though) but I’m constantly scared she’s going to leave me and when we hang out, unless I have a distraction like a movie or something, I get drained super quick but I don’t want to tell her to go home because I don’t want to hurt her feelings or something like that. Most of my friends are online but even there I kinda feel like a burden or like I’m just there. Honestly being alone is way less stressful. I do like talking with people about things we like though but there’s always a fear of rejection lingering, it won’t go away, even with family. So I tend to just push people away.
Low self-esteem. You might have fear of abandonment or borderline personality disorder.
I have A.P.D. and hyperhidrosis.
What a great combo for social life.
Now u described me really Well! I shall try to Get outside now!
I’m 66 I’ve felt like this all my life
I was diagnosed with APD. I have this personality disorder diagnosed for two years now, I am actually glad that my therapy kinda helped me but ofc there are still circumstances, where I get panic attacks when I actually just want to talk to people.
that sucks dawg good luck
@@2FadeMusic thanks, ig hahahahaha
If everyone treats me in an unfriendly manner, than how does that reflect upon me and cause a determination of ' Avoidant personality disorder?"
I’m pretty sure I may have this but my parents just say not to do it and they say I don’t need help
Omg how could I not have realized I had this until now 😭😭
I definitely do not see myself as inferior to anyone.
Ok?
@@hijislay3618 Ok!
@@collarmole1819 Ok!!
Hi, I know I'm 6 days late-but this just popped in my feed, and I'm new to the channel! I'm very interested in this area, and LOVE that you are doing these informational videos!!!!! Thank You!!-
Also I haven't looked yet- idk if You have any on bipolar disorder, depression, or Borderline Personality Disorder!?-but I'd Love to see some on those, too!!? I'll look around & see if I can try to find something!!?
This shit is destroying my life
Hi! Yes you reading this, I just want to say have an amazing day/night! And remember you are beautiful and so intelligent! ^^
😊😊Thank you you too
What makes this disorder more difficult to deal with is the fact that lots of people are naturally wary and judgmental of those with poor social skills, and they will pull away from you or take advantage of you if they sniff out your feelings of inferiority. And that makes the APD sufferer feel that their self-isolation is justified - like "See? People really do hate me and I *am* safer being alone." It's a self-perpetuating cycle that can only be undone by an extremely kind, non-judgmental therapist and good friends.
exactlyyy, it just keeps getting worse unless you're lucky
You really described my life perfectly :(
You truly described it perfectly. Hope you're doing well though
I have AVPD. I don't think the disorder can ever go away completely, but the biggest thing that has helped me is throwing myself into the fire by having a job in which I need to interact with a lot of people. It is not fun, it's extremely exhausting and sometimes painful, but the more I interact with people, the more I realize that most people aren't judgmental and most will like you for who you are. But, all it takes is one bad social interaction, and it will mess with my thinking and I will be back to square one.
@@NATEG01 All these comments describe my viscous cycle of a life perfectly. I've finally had some therapy and I'm starting to do better now but it's still a struggle. But as I grow to liking myself more, it getsceasier tondeal with the struggel.