Amy Schumer Stand-Up Monologue - SNL
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 10 ก.พ. 2025
- Third-time host Amy Schumer talks about how much people love giving pregnant women advice and being intimate with her husband.
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#SNL #AmySchumer #SNL48 #SteveLacy
When Amy was a kid she told her classmates that she is going to be a comedian when she grows up. They all laughed. Nobody is laughing now.
Read this comment somewhere else not original cringe
Yeh me 2 spread the joy
@@DavidWallz saw your comment all over the internet cringe lord.
Haha I get it cuz she is not funny! 🤡
@@DavidWallz you’re right, no one should ever repeat anything said by anyone ever. As the great Stephen hawking once said- “”
It’s always amazing to me how the comments manage to be funnier than the actual video.
Ikr?? It’s so funny
Actually, when you're talking about Amy, it's not that hard to believe at all 😢
Wow, I'm laughing so hard right now. I'm literally crying. I think Amy Schumer's audience was fake laughing the whole time.
Bro facts
Amy Schumer's audience? Do you just mean the "studio audience"?
yes
Amy Schumer is the greatest comedian of all time!
@@nickv2601satire, right?
Shes proof that when it comes to Hollywood its not about being talented its who you know...
No, everyone who hires her just does it so people can laugh at her, they're like "Shhhh, play it cool, everyone, she's gonna do it again."
get a life
...I think she’s hilarious!❤
@@simonedulcie3853 That’s funny, tell another one!
I don't love amy shumer but if anything you're proof she's successful cause you're hating for no good reason
The funniest joke was when Amy Schumer said her husband told her she has a beautiful body. Ironically, that's the one part where the audience felt obligated to NOT laugh.
I mean her face looks like a big toe. Her husband is probably a freak, he might be into to that.
Yeah, we know he was lying
Who the f would marry her
Or the funniest joke, when her parents decided to continue pregnancy
Best part of the video 6:16
Underrated
7:14 was hilarious though
cheers
Lol
Nah 10:00 was underated
Fun fact, SNL stands for "soooo nobody laughed??"
We are saving our laughter for the great denouement of this entity. The time will soon be upon us for applause to lift their roof to hell.
@@johnr.b.murray3417 correction, it’s not a roof, it’s a glass ceiling-to them.
Then why bother watching if you don't like it? 🙄
@@dees_good_vibes3391 Cause I have free will.
“Nazi ties ᵏᵃⁿʸᵉ” alright I chuckled. 😅
I cackled so hard at that I scared the dog
I was not expecting that and I cackled.
Cackle cackle
Brilliance in 1 word
@@invictusgardener3090 dog was like "oh crap my owner thinks Amy Schumer is funny" and it was scared.
the counting straws thing is called arithmomania, and it was first associated with, i shit you not, vampires in folklore. sesame street openly admitted to using that for their count von count character
I never put that together before. I just figured he was the Count, so he counts. 😆😂
@@cc1k435 ironically, i never PUT that together before i learned of the folklore thing because i grew up with Polish sesame street and his name was "liczy-hrabia", literally countingcount
Just to make sure it's clear, people with autism don't necessarily like counting things, the joke was about "outsiders" not understanding what autism is, and using Hollywood stereotypes (ex: "Rain Man") to fill in the gaps.
Wow. That never occurred to me. I have watched endless episodes of Sesame Street and never put the Count and autism together. Verryy interesting!
😮!
I audibly sighed after the "I am in a coma" joke.
I didn't intend to. I didn't decide "I'm going to show my empty office that I did not find this joke funny by sighing loudly."
It was my body's natural and instinctive response to hearing that punch line.
And you are, making all of us sigh with your long-winded and redundant comment.
I thought your comment was on the money...I don't know how "redundant" applies, it was a reaction to AS' redundancy.
I’d wake up from a coma to turn her ass off
@@deviantmoore9744 All comments are redundant, personally I enjoyed the extra details. It’s called storytelling. If ur a fan of Schumer’s I don’t blame you for your ignorance.
I ...also enjoy Any Schumer.
“Well, it’s too late.” 😂 💀
Facts, just the facts, ma'am.
I heard her do that joke before
@@wonderwoman5528 she steals jokes from everyone
@@automatedcomment 😂
@@wonderwoman5528that’s literally how it works
its amazing how she's actually married
Yeah, he's an autistic chef
It's even more amazing how she keeps thinking she's a comedian.
Her husband had asburgerszzz so severe autism.
Its NOT amazing how her career is not dead yet
@Hakai101 No. It's an absolute disgrace she has the temerity to use the term "comedian".
At 41 I learned I have autism. 41 years of life not knowing there was an explanation for the difficulty I had connecting with others. Life of Beth, on Hulu, opened me up to the idea that I had autism. Schumer showed me the door and I chose to walk through it.
I've been laughing at Schumer's jokes for almost a decade now. But, I cannot express adequately how much I appreciate the love she shows her husband and the autism community. So thank you for helping me laugh at myself. Sometimes the stuff I do doesn't make sense to me either. But it's so nice to feel human.
Of course you are human. People who treat you like you are not human are wrong.
I had trouble connecting with others, but it was because I was abused and scapegoated throughout childhood and didn't have the self-confidence to relate to people. I have had MANY friends (and even strangers) recommend I be evaluated for ASD without knowing that I already have been, many times.
I'm not commenting on YOUR diagnosis, per se, but please realize - it is OFTEN a factitious disorder.
Funny - because as someone with autism, I thought her entire premise was ableist and offensive. "Haha - my husband is so funny because he's *different*" is not love for the autism community.
@@onimi66616 I don't know. If we are talking about this "disability" is that maybe a benefit to everyone?
@@onimi66616 dude that's amazing. Thing is.... there has NEVER been a lab test for autism. What symptoms do you have that convince you you're autistic? I used to believe in my own ADHD diagnosis, but I later realized it was PTSD, personally.
"I can't go down on you you're my emergency contact" 🤣🤣🤣😭😭 okay bro that's the funniest shit she has said her whole career 🔥
I wonder who she stole it from?
@@louskunt9798 honestly I laugh directly at her cause she should not be here at all, let alone hosting SNL. The episode was good but I cant remember 1 joke she told, she just looks funny even being there 😭😭😭
@@louskunt9798 Aw Lou. I’m sorry.
@@TheQuota2001 exactly!
@@Lisa-pb3qp thank you. We’re all sorry that she steals her jokes from other comedians.
"It's too late now" I say that all the time
"It's one of the times we played the game Autism, or just a man" 🤣
I play the same game with "my depression or people are awful for real"
Recently diagnosed with Hashimoto's thyroiditis, the main symptom of which is chronic irritability...!?!?!?!?!!!
... I SO feel this comment.
@Zig Zaag Pfft. Maybe watch the Welcome to Hell sketch. Women having been going through this bs for a LONG time.
I'm beginning to wonder if the laughs were real or edited.
Well, I did laugh on exactly 3:51. It is when I paused the video and started reading the comments.
@@phazejump3204 2:04 and i can't continue anymore
They are edited.
Isn't EVERYTHING real on SNL?
Thank you Amy so much for your standup. Because of you, my body cured itself of paralysis so I could get up to turn your routine off
😂
LMAO
Her comedy cured by cancer (just kidding, it didn't really...and I don't have cancer!)
Now that's funny!
The test of a true comedian is if they can make you laugh without resorting to vulgarity. I see a little bit of Chuck in Amy.
Y'know, i have a black wife, with whom I am HAPPILY married, but sometimnes I wonder what kind of industrial equipment I have that would be able to kill her. Not that I have ANY INTENTIONS but I just kina wonder, y'know? I was thinking of what her reaction would be if I put "Shannon sized sandblaster" on my christmas list...
Can't even laugh with the vulgarity
I’m autistic and was unprepared at how my wife needed to run away from laughing too hard at the asd part.
I'm autistic and I think her entire premise there was ableist garbage. No Amy - I'm not some fucking moron who'll pick sticks up off the ground for fun.
Who's next to host SNL.... Bill Cosby's?
@@redscreen6 more than one?
@@redscreen6 - Why do you want Bill cosby?
I'm with your wife. I laughed out loud!
I’m dying of laughter 🗿🗿🗿
😂
i laughed at this comment more than i laughed with her
yeah I wasn’t even trying to be funny 💀💀💀
OMG! Me too!!! shes absolutely hilarious, in my opinion shes better than George Carlin, Louis CK, Eddie Murphy or Dave Attell
@@MBRETION stop this now before you get permanently banned from youtube lol
She's matured a lot in the last 5 years. I look forward to seeing her again, 5 years from now.
Joking about her vagina right off the bat? Yea she’s matured a lot.
Yeah, this time it took her a whole MINUTE to start talking about her genitalia!
Exactly! She’ll need that long to rip off enough jokes to do another show.
@@louskunt9798 😂
Best joke of the show 😂😂
First minute in and of course she’s already talking about sex. I feel like that’s all she talks about.
Crass
It's the only thing women can talk about for cheers and "yes go girl" nods.
What's wrong with that? Sex is funny
@@JoeyJojoJrJr it can be but not like this
@@JoeyJojoJrJr not when you talk about it all the time it gets repetitive
This was so funny i forgot to laugh
Nice one Ted
I did it for u
Oh my golly gosh I did too :0
"came out the sunroof" LOL!
I know, just brilliant
wolverined my fupa 💀💀
I know, I lost it at that😂
... women .... Can't make a joke without being about Thier 🐱
@@jane-kk8ov ... Here a list of people that I know... Dave Chappelle.... Gabriel Iglesias... George Lopez... Chris rock... If you can send me a link of one of their stand ups... Where they talk about nothing but Thier dcks... Plz do ?
I still don't understand why she gets so much grief.
She's not one of my favorite comedians, but if she brings someone else joy, who cares.
It's because her uncle is a Democrat, so republicans hate her.
because she steals jokes
If you rob a bank and give the money to other people, the people you robbed the money from care. She steals jokes from people who don't make the kind of money she makes. Then, those people can't really do those jokes because other people will see them and say they stole them from Amy since Amy used them on TV first.
She doesn't steal jokes.
She's being called a a joke stealer. And the people who initially laid out those allegations have since retracted them.
She's annoying, isn't funny. Complained about pay with Netflix (when she had one of the worst rated specials ever). Made the Chris Rock slap about her. Alot more
I love how the comments are funnier than the comedian
I think all the hate comments are so weird. Like, this video has almost 1 million views, she is a mainstream comedian, rich and successful by any metric and yet people take time to come onto sites like this and post critical comments as if she is at home scrolling through them and feeling bad about herself. She doesn't give a sh@t. Jokes on all the haters who only wish they had her money and stardom.
being a comedian is about money and stardom? I believe it’s supposed to contain some form of humor.
Point being she obviously makes people laugh or she wouldn't have become famous and successful @@treverfarted
Lmao I've been walking away from boring conversations since I was a child. We're not trying to bruise anyone's ego's, they're just...... ya know. I watched Amy and her husband's cooking show during the pandemic and it was one of the most incredibly wholesome things I've seen. She understands him but also isn't afraid to real with him and there were many gently hilarious moments. Being on the spectrum doesn't make you any less worthy or capable of finding real love. Many are still searching but seeing Amy openly love someone who has autism, especially on this platform, is helping break barriers. Thank you girl!
I missed the cooking show! Definitely looking it up now.
Break barriers? Lol. So because you walk away from "boring conversations" you classify yourself as autistic? Maybe you're just not knowledgeable enough to participate in the conversation? Lots to think about.
I thought your name was retartedanarchist because of what you said but I see you also have autism so that would work for that too.
@@tapetwo7115 Yes, it is I, Amy Schumer.
"Autism or Just a Man" is also played in our home:)
Out of the total views only the 1.32% are thumbs up.. And yet all the comments speak wonders about Amy's monologue and how wonderful she is hahahaha!!! ... Feels like the comments section is been heavily edited. Im pretty sure this comment will get deleted very quickly
haha I had to scroll so far through people praising her to find a comment like this that is actually real. TH-cam has clearly been compromised. Sad to see but inevitable.
Amy Schumer, thank you for talking about ASD. Awareness makes a difference.
you can almost hear the "LAUGHTER" sign lighting up after every joke
Amazing monolog!!!! She killed it!!! And I'm so glad that she uses her platform to educate people about Autism. I appreciate it so much. 💚
*Monologue.
@@onimi66616 So very sorry to be human and make a typo. My sincerest apologies.
@@nikkib317 Fair. But I saw the same lazy misspelling like five times and commented under all of them.
@@onimi66616 Yup. I'm lazy. Take care.
@@nikkib317 shut up
"One of the times we play the game, AUTISM or JUST A MAN?"
LOVE you, Amy!
I see what you did there.. capitalized the main words you really want people to read. A form of hypnosis... Maybe this is a fake comment ( one of many ) written by her or her staff. anyway that woman is not at all funny. Never was. People who know comedy know this.
@@leoman6594 no one’s interested in your butthurt trolling
@@leoman6594 are you sad?
@@leoman6594 People know what resonates with them and what doesn’t. They also know what *they* find funny. People who know themselves know this. 😉
And apparently you don’t have a very clear understanding of hypnosis, either. 🙄
@@calisongbird amy or one her sheep, definitely.
Hey those are some very great jokes! Dont know why people hate on her so much
Cuz she r@pe a man n bragged about it... And she stole jokes from others and expect to be paid more then the people she stole the joke from...
I spit out my food when she said “nazi ties…Kanye” 😂
People are so harsh 😢 let her be, let everyone be whatever makes them feel good. She is not on government benefits 😊
Other than Chuck. Maybe that is the future. Relatives of active politicians only being sanctioned by the government to be allowed to perform.
you always know something is trash when they hide the dislikes. LOL. LMAO EVEN.
Dislikes are hidden for every video now
Amy Schumer is BRILLIANT just BRILLIANT!
.....okay buddy.
ASD IN DA HOUSE!! 😎💪😎
Thank you, Amy! I realized I was autistic at 47 years of age and knowing what was going on with me and why I felt so different was a huge relief! Thank you for bringing this up with so much warmth and humor. Loved it!
Oh so she's now using autism as a diversion for being a complete hack?
She's an attention seeking loser trying to make herself seem like she's really not the kind to stab people in the back for her own gain. Using his ASD for publicity to distract from the lack of talent and morals she has.
Bet she stole the whole bit off another comedian 😅
@@adshar20000 what has that got to do with anything? I have Aspergers and I have also been on the UK stand up circuit so I can speak frankly about both the fact Amy is a hack and the exploitation of her husbands ASD as some sort of way of making her look like she's a good person (spoiler alert, she isn't)
Stop looking to these 'celebrities' to give you any sort of comfort or reality in the world... The majority of them don't give a shit about anything but money and their ego being boosted. That's why I stick to working behind the cameras now.
@@alana2830 agree
Unstoppable Amy.
Velvet from DreamWorks Trolls: Band Together (2023)
When actual comedians do the monologue, it’s the best 😂
“actual comedians” so basically everyone except amy schumer
in this case no
I have ASD and I resemble that remark...
😄
Those were bad jokes
Fun Fact: Amy Schumer is way better comedian than Bernie Mac.
Her: "Inside Amy Schumer is back"😄👏👏👏
Me, and the rest of America: 🤔"Nobody asked for that😂😂💯."
I'm not sure where Amy Schumer has been, But can we please send her back there?!?!😂😂💯
The switch-off-the-lights-during-sex joke was funny to me.
She could do really well here in Germany, we also have no humor.
The video didn't make me laugh. Your comment did. I am from Germany, by the way.
This monologue is so relatable about your relationship with your husband! And, the game “Autism, or Just a Man” is genius! 😂😭😭😭😭
What? Genius? What are these people laughing at?
Yeah and if a man spoke of his emotional wife and said "bipolar or just a woman?" His career would be over.
@@billysullivan6788 Yes, finally.
@@MarieGlennalove that double standard. Have a nice life . hope no one you know is mentally I'll. Then again you are it sounds like. I mean you find this trash heap funny.
@@MarieGlenna wow. Hypocrisy
Love it
Sometimes when I need a laugh I look up amy Schumer.
Pause the video.
And read the comments 😂🤣
I'm gonna lie this shit made me laugh my ass off
Amy Schumer looks great.
For a parade float.
i love the fake applause
Finally a comedian hosting SNL. Best set this season.
You mean a joke thief.
She's the greatest, eriod :)
Everyone's always saying that Amy Schumer's not funny, but this is great, dude. The like to dislike ratio's nuts here! why does everyone hate this? Do people not like amy schumer for something else? like holy sh** this does not deserve 7.6k dilikes to 5.5k likes wtf??
How can you see the dislikes?
Whoever has been married for longer than the honeymoon period knows this is utterly factual!!!
I pity you
Not if you're with the right person.
@@HealthHorror Come back and tell us that after another 20 years, dear. 😑
@@altitudeiseverything3163 Ok. I will. Better than being super negative about it and just staying in that rut.
@@HealthHorror Not “negativity”…. realism. Marriage, like the rest of life, is a series of many small ups and downs, triumphs and tragedies. To expect sunshine and roses all the time sets expectations that we, or our spouses may not be able to live up to, at least not all the time. So I would say that realism is the more loving, and ‘bulletproof,’ way to see one’s relationship. But what do I know, after decades of marriage and having raised two grown, well-adjusted children to successful adulthood . . . 🙄 But when tough challenges do come your way, you’ll likely work it out and find your way through. Most people do, even if they initially bought into the fantasy of perfection in the beginning. I do wish you the best. 🌷
Nooo SNL. If you're trying to prove you're funny still, the last thing you should even think of doing is bring Amy Schumer to host.
Came for the comments
Great, she comes out and immediately plugs two shows.
Chelsea Handler joke theft alert!!!
A line of fashion products called, "It's too late." Lmao
Yes!!
Imagine how low the expectations were that some people actually found this funny smh
Every sketch Amy was in was hysterically funny. She is even funnier these days because she can joke about being a wife and mother.
Amy Schumer doing standup is like watching a car crash in slow motion
Autism, or just man?
@@chervenotikveniche I don't think she's either of those things.
Strange how things she said makes sense to the diddy leaks with her 🤔
"They almost never come out of your butthole" 😂
I hear it’s about 13% of the time in America
could just as easily be her talking about the men she had sex with to get them to write for her.
God damn... This was actually funny. (this is my opinion, so relax, those who have the need to force their views and opinions in order to delegitimize other people's opinions as a sad form of attention seeking)
Im not a fan of this lady but coming in with an open mind she and her writers did great. All of these people in the comments are pretty weird, why are you hear watching her if you don’t like her? Get a fricken life you all are immature haters, she’s kinda winning
All of Amy's jokes are like the ice breaker jokes at the beginning at the set except the ice breaker holes keep going and going and going.....
As someone who has Aspergers myself everything she said about Chris is pretty much me
so stunning, so brave. when she said "its morbin time" I knew she would win a Nobel peace prize for this performance.
Wtf are you talking about
What? Is this English?
You must be on meth. She was as funny as a crutch.
Truly one of the comments of all time.
@@Virgil_1214 user name checks out
I was being wheeled in for an emergency C section when my kid decided he was going to come out my butthole 😅
it can sure feel like it is 😂
Im not gonna lie...i laughed at some of the jokes 🤣
They probably weren't her jokes to tell
@@alana2830 she also delivered the jokes well, regardless of whether she wrote the jokes or not.
@@svmto I'm not sure if you're trolling or you've missed the point?
The very fact that SNL have given her a platform is an insult to comedy.
If you legitimately don't know what I mean, Google 'Amy Schumer steals jokes'... You don't even have to go anywhere close to the rabbit hole to see exactly how she's just a complete hack.
@@alana2830 we've seen MUCH WORSE over the years. Lets take SNL for the platform it currently is...
@@alana2830 I mean they had Dave Chapelle on recently, they don't exactly have good standards lmao.
"my husband is an autist"
well we have guessed that...
Never assume that loud is strong and quiet is weak.
nice good day to you
best ye rip yet
i like how the band in the background was uncontrollably cracking up the whole time.
I just saw her stand up in San Francisco half an hour with my boyfriend. We laughed through out the whore tour show. She’s amazing.
@@drama2u you have brain damage if you think this is funny.
They get pay to pretend and part of the background acting.
Kanye mic 🎤 malfunction 😂
Awesome Monologue!! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽😂
The 'demise' of Roe V Wade was not a pro or against abortion decision. The Supreme Court has a responsibility to prevent the FED from having unlimited power. The 10th amendment was written to give States rights over the Federal Government in everything not expressed in the US Constitution. If your State is banning abortion, protest your State government, also ask your representative why was their no contingency in place?
And if you choose me ladies, you'll get to play autism or just a man
I wonder who wrote her jokes lol
Definitely not you lol
Also, the game “autism? Or just a man?” 😂😂😂😂
I love all the hate comments by people living under a bridge.
r/AreTheStraightsOkay
I don't understand how anyone can think that this show is still funny. I think there's a reason why so many people quit the show last season....including Pete Davidson.
"Amy Schumer is the funniest person on the planet." - Norm Macdonald
How.... I didn't laugh once
@@redscreen6 it's sarcastic 🤌🏻
Perfect video to put me to sleep
I usually skip the monologue automatically. I also kind of dislike amu Schumer, but she spoke like a normal person here, I didn't mind her
This probably would’ve been funnier if they hired a comedian to host.
It’s funny how so many men living in their parents basement have so much free time to comment on every Amy Schumer’s clips
💙💙💙💙thank u Amy for saying what needed to be said n making us laugh in the process. We all gotta get out n vote to save our country n our rights.
Yes! Vote Fetterwoman, Hobbs, Abrams if you can. We need to empty the prisons and keep the border open. We must keep crime on the rise and turn conservative strongholds into cities full of needle infested, poop sidewalks, and homeless camps. Vote blue no matter who! Whoop whoop! Eff Kanye! We choose truth over facts. In fact, there are 54 states behind Biden and his fight to deflate inflation.
I'm going with "just a man." Hahahaha!
Did she steal these jokes too?
Meghan Trainor of comedy. You know?
HILARIOUS 🤣🤣🤣 Legend! The last joke- "Its too late." 😅😅 I also love watching the bands reaction XD
Yes, Miss Piggy is a Legend
She's only slightly better than the kids I see at my high schoolers talent show. In a word: boring.
worst jokes ever.