I think one way or another, sooner or later, but I am positive they will check on you! Openly or secretly. They need to check if you are still suffering. So, to all survivors, keep your circle small, and store your memories in your heart, not on your feed.
They put you on the shelf and if you move forward with your life and escape from their shelf and if you meet someone else,oh boy their emotional punching bag escaped from their shelf, they don't like it at all, remember one thing your happiness is their disappointment 👍 Jess thanks for the video 💯
I was hoovered several times. Each time it was because he needed something. He said he missed me and loved me. Bahahahaha he doesn’t know what love is. He’s someone else’s problem now. I told him to go to hell and it caused a narcissistic injury because he knows that’s exactly where he’s going.
The same thing happened to me, during one hoover he told me he needed someone who understands him, guess his new supply didn’t get him and dumped him as it was only 6 weeks after I ended it. In the end I told him to leave me alone, his reply “you leave me alone” that made me laugh he always hoovered and bothered me. He’s blocked now and hopefully will leave me alone but I doubt it 🤦♀️
@@catlady6938 yea they always come back. I’ve blocked him on everything as well. I worry he will come to my apartment as he has before. He caught me getting out of my car one night. So I look out for him when I pull in. He just wants to use me. I’m over that.
@@Thergirl666 mine is the same he just wants to use me too, he sometimes goes where I meet up with friends I tried to avoid him and he hangs around waiting for me to turn up, I just ignore him. They are mad people, stay safe.
The trick is not to care if they care. Just take care of yourself. That’s all the care you need. Nobody needs Narc care as Narc care is not caring as you all know………
My covert narc actually said "have a wonderful day" in this cheery tone after I broke up with him. Had to see him a couple times after to pick up his things and he acted so nonchalant that it was irritating and creepy. He was carrying on like nothing happened and text on Monday morning, "hope you have a great week." That's when I had to stonewall him. I think he was employing a game to hurt me even more. That and I'm 99% sure he was cheating with an ex so maybe he was just relieved he could go be with her now. The truth is, I don't know and I don't really care. I'm grateful to be rid of the dysfunction, but I'll catch myself really wanting answers and details sometimes and I have to remember that I'll probably never get them and the important thing is that I'm rid of that bullshit for good and I have zero desire to be with him anymore. As a side note, I'm positive in the last weeks of our relationship, he was having sex with someone and coming over and crawling into my bed, still smelling of it. The level of disrespect and nastiness is a good repellent on any fantasies of getting back together. It's easier to get over them when you realize you were just a big game to them. They have no real feelings or empathy. Covert narcs are hard to spot though. He was the last person I expected to be a narc. Kind, thoughtful, good listener etc. Boy, was I wrong and I'm just upset at myself for not seeing the red flags sooner. Good luck to you all in your healing journeys.
I got through very similar situation. I wish you well. What narcs do is only cause wounds, they do it on purpouse and when they suppousedly apollogize they are slashing us againg in those wounds to hurt even more. Their morals are a mocking copie of that one of a child, they remember you the dammage done as a ressentment to mark "you didnt loved me as i needed and as i wanted". A terrible tauntrum wraped in fake good manners. Theyre nutcases. Perceiving that attitute is like looking directly to the void.
Thank you for sharing your story. My ex narc screamed “ IT AIN’T ABOUT YOU”! I was shocked because I simply reminded her that BOTH of our feelings mattered in the relationship. And we had to be considerate of how we treat one another. She hit every stereotype of a narcissist. Victim hood, lying, cheating , devalue and demonic mind games. After YEARS of gaslighting me about not teaching her how to drive and blaming me for her adult decisions. Regardless, I still loved her and wanted her see her grow. I made it my mission to teach her as I noticed she was making a sincere effort to learn. Literally for almost every day for a year I gave her my confidence, patience, love and time to teach her the lifelong art of driving. Months later I found out she using those same skills to drive over another man house to have a whole relationship on me. She is a true monster and I have been traumatized by her cheating and lies.
@@100nation5 I'm so sorry to hear that. My narc definitely used me too and it makes it worse that he came across so caring and giving in the beginning. Pretty soon he was constantly trying to drive my car when he has his own damn car, telling me I'm moving too fast after wanting a commitment after 2 months of dating, then proceeds to want to move in after 3 months. Lol screwing his ex the whole time.... ugggh. I'm free now. I hope you can find healing in your mess my dear
@@beatrixbrennan1545 Thank you for your sincere message. I’m sooo srry to hear that your ex used you in that matter. I sincerely hope you have FULL closer n your life dealing with him. He seemed like a complete douch bag of a human being. Karma is like a clock it comes back around. As a narc survivor I am here for you.
@@100nation5 you know it's funny, I woke up this morning feeling much better about the whole situation. I just had this gut feeling that there would be such good karma for him. I'm a Christ follower so it's more of reaping what they've sewn, but definitely.... God will get him!!
I always suspected something was wrong with my ex. She was so so so image conscious in my marriage. She had to have the very best clothes, all of the beauty treatments and cosmetic surgeries (breast) and capped teeth. I get that women want to feel beautiful but this was so over the top. I considered it vanity to an extreme. She also seemed to have no concern or interest in me and my interests or desires. She loved bombed me hard in the beginning and I really fell for it. She mirrored my hobbies early as I was an avid runner, golfer and hiker. She seemed to love those things too. But that was until we were married. Then all that fell away. I never have felt so loved by a woman ever early in the relationship. She rushed the relationship and the "I love you-s" and then the live together, the engagement and then the marriage and kids. It was a vortex of change that made my head spin. Once the kids came, things really changed. I was no longer important except for what I could do for her. Covering with the kids so she could advance her career or travel for work. Not that I shouldn't do that. I was happy to do that for our family. I have no regrets for that. But it became clear this was a 1-way street and there was no appreciation expressed by her for anything I contributed to our family. It was expected and there was no desire from her to help me improve my career or explore my interests. I was only of value for what I brought to the relationship and the family and as time went along, my value in her eyes dropped and dropped. I take full accountability for feeling bad about myself. I allowed myself to accept her opinion of me as the true value I held of myself. I did this. Not her. I tried very hard to hold onto my self worth but I was so connected to her emotionally that she overwhelmed me with her personality. Ultimately I caved to her. In the end I felt as though I had no value or even negative value when she withdrew all of her emotion from me. I was a vacuum desperately seeking validation and getting nothing from my wife. It was where she wanted me to be. I was powerless to affect her and she could demand anything from me and I honor her. Until one day. She wanted to separate our finances and I said ..."that is enough". I had had enough. I immediately separated our financial assets and asked her for a divorce. I caught her off guard. She didn't expect that. She didn't have her escape plan in place yet. Her next supply had not yet been groomed. She was stuck. I was in a power position. We progressed through the divorce process and I held my ground and remained in a power position. I felt okay. But then after 10 months after divorce she called to inform me that she was going to start dating. I had not felt ready for that. For whatever reason, that triggered hidden trauma and I was suicidal in just 12 hours and had to be committed to a psychiatric hospital for my protection. All the power shifted back to her. Now I am fighting to get back. Its been really hard.
Yes oh my goodness went thru EVERY type of abuse imaginable and when he found out I was elevating as you say he was pulling out his love bomb tricks! But of course im (trying) to stay no contact 💪💪
Thanks Jess, going through this horrible mess one step at a time. Dont know what I would be doing if i hadnt acces to channels like this. 👍❤ you are helping people all around the planet. Cheers from🇲🇽
In my case he came back the first time he found out I started dating again (six months after I left him) and he hoovered a second time when I finally got hired in my dream job (almost a year later). He never appeared when my father passed away so I considered them attempts to bother me because he knows I can’t stand him and probably wanted to ruin the occasion. Even though he’s always been blocked he finds a way to try it directly once then indirectly a couple of times before he finally disappears again. I already went through the brutal smear campaigns so I just ignore him. What else is he gonna say? He already said it all and those who chose to believe him I no longer associate with. Life’s natural filter 🤷🏻♀️
What you were talking about reminded me of the time my ex narc husband put a particular TV show on the TV and then proceeded to go outside and Mow 2 Acres which took hours. When he got back in hours later he asked me if I watch that TV show? I said no I had changed it to another show. He got Furious that I didn't watch the show that he would have watched if he had not been outside mowing for hours.
You’ve really helped me and a few of my friends out over the past week since I discovered your videos and shared with them! You are a GEM 💎 thank you for your time, research and advice! ❤️💪🏽
I also think: reaching out for Exes after some time, is due to feeling, bad , lonely, no supply, bored, desperate etc. and this accounts not only for narcissists.
Hi Jess. I am unsubscribing from your channel only because thanks to you and many others like you I have been able to move on. There are some things I still have to work on, but for the most part I have been able to heal. So I feel that part of moving on is also putting this information aside since I have learned it by heart. And being notified about new videos is only reminding of how hurt I used to be. I really hate to do this but I feel like is something healthy and necessary. Thank you so much for being such a blessing to people like me and don't give up the good work. Best wishes to you.
I broke up with my Narc a week after marriage for cheating on me with my groupmate and found out there were others.. I tried to divorce him but the court said I had to wait 3 months. He didn't try to sweet talk me or anything until the last week of the 3rd month. He had the nerve to say he's fighting for his marriage, I told him maybe just maybe if you apologized we could've move forward, from this day he hasn't apologized. The 3rd month came and he refused to sign the papers, knowing I was going out of the country. I left the country came back 3 months later he locked me out of my own home!! He changed all the locks but accused me of changing the lock, when I left the country I turned off my phone because he wouldn't stop calling me. He told all my family members and friends that I locked him out the house and is cheating on him with 2 guys. I come back home thinking I was unable to get into my home, so I contacted the landlord, the landlord didn't want anything to do with it because the Narc threatened him. My landlord advised me to move because he said that man is going to hurt you. I told the landlord I just need all my things so he would need to change the locks, call the police or get the key. The landlord refuses, so I learned the landlord is his uncle and they're working together. Eight months has gone by and I walked away from everything so I thought. The narc text with paperwork saying me and him are being sued by the landlord, that I need to fly home to handle this because he doesn't like dealing with drama (everything was him) I knew it was a lie because I was the only one on the lease, so why would he be getting sued. The landlord wanted his property back and said I abandoned his property and he's suing me for that and 6k in electricity. Another tactic by the Narc. I still had 3 months left until my lease was up and proof I didn't abandoned the place as I was locked out for 8 months. The landlord knew he didn't have a leg to stand on, so he said come get you items and I will give you 8k back on your rent (I paid a year upfront), I didn't trust none of them so I told him when I get a military escort I will come. I forgot to mention I moved on to another relationship. Me and my current partner and his brother went there to get my items, come to find out the locks were never changed he just told me that, the landlord said to my guy oh you're taking a person wife huh. My guy said no she was mines first we separated, she got with him, he abused her and didn't treat her right, so now she's back home where she'll be loved. The landlord is trying to convince us to pay him to paint his home and pay the electric bill without proof of the bill, my guy told him you need to ask her husband your tenant, you know the one you tried to sue, he's financially responsible for her here in this country from what her permit says and why would you come after the women? The landlord gave us one hour to be in and out, his terms in order to get the 8k back in rent. The narc damaged all my equipment and my clothes were destroyed! He also took off with the marriage certificates. It was a waste of money flying there. And the landlord never gave us the money back. We fly back home, moved into a bigger home, life is going great!! We hired a lawyer to deal with the divorce, everything is great! The Narc started stalking us from other pages because he was block so he created fake accounts. My social media started to be hacked personal and business account, all got deleted a few times. The narc calls me stating he will be going to Afrochella and he will see us there. I thought how do he know we're going to Afrochella? He hacked my email and seen the tickets. 🎟 Now the threaten begins! He told me he will get me deported and shot the both of us. I told him I will call the police, he then said my uncle is head of the police and my sister is head of military. I contacted both his sister and uncle and told them I will be filing a claim on them because I will not be protected here and forward them his voice message. The narc called begging me to please don't do that they can lose their jobs I said hey you did this. Everyone moved on so I thought! The sister calls to tell me to come back home he's really hurting because you left him and is now in another relationship. I told her I don't know what he's tell you but we haven't been together since a week after the marriage, she was so surprised, she thought we recently separated, I told her no and sent her all the proof. That had him so mad because I exposed him, everyone thought we were still together and thought I was out the country for business. I told her I can't be with a person who can't take care of me. Before I moved to Africa from USA I thought we were building I told his sister come to find out he paid his college tuition with the money I sent him to register our business, I'm thinking me and him were going have but he was using me all along. The sister was shocked 😲 so she called him and this happened. The narc started playing on my phone again, sending me videos and pictures of his new relationship (Supposedly) , I said congratulations but he kept texting me. I said for a person so happy in his relationship but your trying to give me all your time while laying next to your girl hmm, Sir please move on and sign the divorce papers. It's a year later and I'm still fighting for this divorce!! 😔 I deleted all my social media platforms and went ghost!! 👻 Hopefully this divorce will be finalized soon so I can marry my true love!! My guy had enough and called him of course the coward never answered, but that stop the calls for now. It's crazy because no one believes me and he's a TH-camr 🤦🏽♀️ you would think he's nice like that in real life but he's the devil!! Maybe he will divorce me soon if y'all spam his comments with divorce Suhuyini let her free and move on!! Amaraba Africa is the page name!! He lied about everything, even having another wife. He recently texted my mother stating I'm going to come up missing 🤦🏽♀️This man is crazy and won't leave me and my family alone! 😢 The laws here are different, it can take up to 2 years for the divorce if he doesn't sign. I forgot to mention once I said I do sex stop and he started hitting me (Playing hitting me but hard like he really was trying to hurt me, which the hits hurted) and telling me no one will want me, this is after I found out about the cheating and wanted to divorce. Sorry for the long story but please be careful and continue to heal!! I literally lost everything but gained freedom and a soulmate! ❤️ The only thing is I have bad anxiety now and high blood pressure!
Smile Jess. You’ve overcome the narcissist in your life. Thank you for putting this out there for people to learn and share our stories. I finally have peace in my life after a life time (40 years ) with the person I loved with all my heart. I wish I’d learned about all this sooner but I guess that’s life. Brighter days ahead keeps me smiling. Thank you again
Yeah the Hoovers started slowing up and the last one was after a year. Once they realize you are not a good source of supply they move on until they feel like you need to be reminded of who they are
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Two weeks afther my ex was a total narc psyco she tought i had goten a new girlfriend and she changed completly it was the ms jecyl and ms hide moment. I was so shocked by the change that i could not lett her in, and when i explaned that i did not have a new girlfriend , just a new model for Photoshoot , she relaxed and pulled away again , but emotionaly i was pulled back in :(
Im in the process of cleaning mi mind. Its hard and its very difficult. Burning days fast, burning time, lockdown has everybody and everything stuck, im still feelling like a ghost doing rutine schedules but no great meaningful emotions to stack. Feel like being in a pause, a comma or in suspense...
I got a taunting email after i settled a court battle with my narc. I won the settlement but it was way less than i should have won. She then emailed me to taunt me. That was the one source that i forgot to block. I did not respond and hit the "block" function. I'm sure it bothered her that i didn't respond. So thankful to be away from her FOREVER!!!
True! I had a hedonism narky ex-husband, he did everything inaccessibility.. Drugs, Cigs,drinking, BIG tires on jeep, BIG TV...this was in 1990 before big tv were in style. Sweet guy, but I divorced him because of his spending. When we separated he left me in an empty apartment basically. I bought a brand new house, shortly after the divorce. He was coming by my house showering me with flowers and balloons trying to get back into my life. I don't even know how he knew where I lived. We didn't have internet back in 1990. I didn't take him back ( he wasn't that good in bed with liquor dick ) But it's true he wanted back in my life after I bought that house, he didn't want me.
@@katrinamenzies9398 Have you ever noticed most of your narcissists are alcoholics or have a drinking problem. They so insecure that they have to drink or do drugs. ya know
He forgot I exist. His mistake is it gave me coping skills. I used to spiral but not anymore. When you hurt someone time and again they stop trying. I'm a non entity to him so I just live my life.
My narcissist ex husband did this, he was in a bar with his new supply and saw me with a guy I was seeing yrs after the marriage ended and bought this up in court and judge told him I was entitled to be out and I didn't have to stay at home forever, my ex husband steam came out through him at this statement I could see for myself that I was something he thought he owned me and didn't see what he had done to me and my children, it was actually scary, it's like he thought he could do what he wanted with all the women he had affairs with but I wasn't allowed to move on, he NO POWER OVER ME ANYMORE.
Ohhhh yes as soon as the narc seen i was happy and she tried every trick in the book to try and break me and my wife up and had the nerve to get pissed when she couldnt did it YOUR RIGHT! in that muts head i should have been in my house crying heaf down waiting for my old trash to come back around but now i know she's crazy because in her mind she really thinks that even after years pass that i would want her anywhere near me
He used to have my undivided attention, apparently I needed to be ‘punished’ so he gave me silent treatment. 5 days later, txt me to find out who I’m chatting with or sleeping with in the vilest language ever. He’s going to keep wondering. He’s got new supply, he can keep gathering stones.
I left 6 months ago (married almost 25 years) and I'm not so much being hoovered as being breadcrumbed. He doesn't have new supply (at least not one who has fallen for him, try as he may. But his wooing of her and going on holiday with her have me the push I needed to make the leap!) and he doesn't want me to divorce him. He'd have to fork over half of his fortune. I'm happy to keep things from getting ugly for now, as we still have a 14-year-old daughter to raise. I fear he'll get all icky if I divorce him (although I've got enough goods on him to ruin his reputation at work and with his family, but I'm keeping my cards close to my chest.).
Jess I don’t know how long it’s been since he went, but you could still be hoovered. I know a narcissist who did it after 30 years, once he knew he could he ghosted her. I know him well, he’s ensuring he always has a place to go if things go tits up while he’s messing his current Bo around. Sorry to be the bearer of such news 🥴, but at least you can get a sick bag ready. Haven’t finished listening yet, just made me think of something 👍🏻
The narcissist is an empty shell, they have to see you to know they exist, it could be that simple, when you look in the mirror and there’s nobody there, the only way you know you exist is to find someone that once loved you or even hates you, and get in front of them. Its like a normal person pinching themselves
Been gone 5 months after 5 years of dealing with her crap. She didn't hoover all she did was send a $5 spot me thru chime. Guess hoping I'd send it back but I went no contact
Leaving a Narc is nothing more than a huge inconvenience for them. That's it., bc now they may have" back up supply", but now they'll have to start all over again with having a main person in there life to shit on. 🤷🏻♀ I think depending on how easy of a person you are to manipulate (like I am), I'm sure they will try any means nesisary to keep tabs on you. One comment I read was absolutely rt, keep your circle small and don't post about your personal life on social media. I'm leaving at the end of this month. It's taken a whole year to be patient and plan. I'm going no contact and leaving state. 6 and a half hrs away. It's not been an easy thing to do, but I don't think I would have had the courage to actually move on with my plans if it weren't for videos such as this and reading what other's post about their experiences. I do however feel like I'm the "bad guy" for leaving even though he's the one that's done so much wrong to me. It's all really just so f'd up. 😞
going to be a year of NO CONTACT this coming end of june and this foo doesnt stop trying to hoover me, like bruh move on , go away i wish he was like ur ex narc , flat out ignore me or try to, my ex narc doesnt stop
I still don't understand why narcissists still have pictures of some of us on their social media after Grey Rock, well for me its been over a year of Grey Rock⚔🛡, I wonder🤔🤔 because my brother told me recently and asked me why does the narcissist still have pictures of her and I together still on her Facebook gallery, after all that smear campaign painting me as a bad person, shes a covert narcissist by the way also she use to be my best friend.
Good morning Jess! 🌻 ironically, about two minutes before you notified us of your most recent video, the narcissist sent me a text message saying that she wanted to "stop by" and get some things that are being held in storage on my property! Yup, I think this is a case of "goods and services".... at this point it feels that I am simply an apparatus not only for her to store her stuff on my property, but, at her "beck and call" I will be receptive to her coming here.... oh well, after being used as a doormat for all these years, i'll live with another intrusion....Happy Sunday, Jess! Thank you so much, again! 💞
I've often thought when I've felt sad or lonely that going back to my Ex is NOT the answer to that problem. If anything, it'd be going back into the fire and I've been burnt so many times, I so want to be rid of the scars. 🍒
My situation is just odd. When I was young I had a crush/summer romance. I was devastated when I found out he had a girlfriend. He told me he would come back to me. I was turned off. Some years later he married another lady. She had been the school beauty queen. I forgot all about them. Years later, one of my relatives died and he contacted me. I didn't respond right away. I was busy, and then forgot about him. When I went to answer the message, I had been blocked. The whole thing was weird. I think he was offended that I had not been sitting home thinking about him.
Hey Jess. I finally subscribed to your channel. I've been watching for a while but fell off for a while but I'm pleased to say that I'm in month # 15 since I have seen/ been with the ex-narc and even in the triggered moments, I haven't reached out to her and it's gets better. Thanks.
When my ex left she know the hardest thing for me was being away from my daughter. We agreed on 50/50 custody which is awesome, but now my ex is all the sudden a lesbian, living with her new supply and her step dad and her daughter(some real jerry springer shit🙄). But she has started to send me pics of all of them doing family stuff on her weeks. Is it normal for split parents to do that? It’s taking every bit of good natured energy I have to remain grey and respond only with a “👍”. These people are sick!
Jess I have a question. I work with my ex female narc. We we’re together 8 yrs and married only 8 months and divorced because she always accused me of cheating. She gave me the push/pull syndrome for almost 2 yrs after and the last time she told me our history together is finished. After I agreed because I was sick and tired of her toxic ways and moved on to someone else. She found out about it and saw my new love and I together. Since she gives me the Silent Treatment, she ignores my existence and avoids me wherever she can. Why do you think she acts this way?
Mine's sounds to be just like yours. On the Outs..Maybe because I called him out on 2 Big things at the end...lol...He was Shocked ...You would of thought he Saw a Ghost....lol
Thanks Jess this was a really good one. Yeah he's pissed off with me cuz I won't let him cross my boundaries so I think he kicked his daughter out because like you said they have to go back to the ex's and things cuz they're lonely so yeah I feel like he's about to reach out to somebody and leave us alone
I have to share living with my ex narcissistic partner , complicated why but now two years .He has met somebody lately and I am glad he did before me (too busy healing ha) but I find it hard his meeting somebody because of the trickery you know you have endured is all being played out the exact same way ... same texts same compliments same everything its so odd thinking how they are back in the lovebombing saddle ...and even a bit of pain even though I know now it wasn't love he was capable of only control and manipulation and abuse but still when you are blind to it like the new supply is at the moment ,well you remember how good it felt in ignorance I guess and wow yes he was good at it ... she will be worse off too as he is living with me and imagine the games he will play
My narc is remarried. He AND his bride continue to harass me. They have done things I can't even creatively make up. They have involved the two boys we have together and tried to alienate them from me. It's insane. I caught them cheating, I filed for divorce, they got married 2.5-3 years later and they will not leave me alone. It's insane.
Haven't cared since the last message I have sent to " make peace" check about them and abandon the resentment..I wondered a bit why no message before I contacted back and quite felt the coldness in the reply. Last message I have sent was a question which never received any answer and then it has been a year and a half since then.I have heard they have changed job on a press article (quite hurtful imo because I have cared when they exposed a bit of their problems to me/complained and I have realised I have just provided emotional support so I felt used for that in the end) but never directly from them.. so no there is no harassment on my part. Just me feeling very resentful at times and the bitterness I can't deal with sometimes knowing that I was just being used and as it went quite far ( my reputation was demolished as I have received threats from her), it is been upsetting.
Another great video Jess. The narc i was dealing with doesn’t care about anything that has something to do with me that’s for sure, after all she called me the biggest mistake of her life so I guess she is gone for good what do you think?
I don't think we should ever say gone for good. I've had toxic people try and return years after dealing with them. Never say never is a good philosophy to adopt, in my opinion. Get as wise and strong as fast as you can. Hope for the best, prep for the worst.
@@JessStanley thanks for your quick answer but I’m all most positive about not being hoovered especially after a brutal smear campaign and her whole family seeing me as the crazy person furthermore I also exposed her but I will remember what you are saying 🙂
It's rare to never be hoovered. I always say if you haven't been hoovered, you haven't waited long enough. However! Don't wait! Make the decision today that they aren't allowed back in your life! Don't wait for them to choose. You choose who is in your life and who has no place there!
Think of it as a blessing you have not been hoovered, mine has hoovered me around 7 times I know that’s usually the limit so hopefully that’s it now, but I’m not holding my breath 🤦♀️
I've been with a narc for about a year and half. I found out he had a live in girlfriend. How does the supply work in this case? How does "more value" work in a case like this? He introduced me to his kids and family, he got my name Tattooed on him all while he lived with his girlfriend. I'm confused. Anybody have some input for me? I'm confused..
So the last me won’t ever hurt me bc he has thousands of supply on social media and not counting friends or pasts women by the way he only cares about women with tattoos low clase. He won’t Hoover me he has enough supply and I don’t care I’m better now
I think one way or another, sooner or later, but I am positive they will check on you! Openly or secretly. They need to check if you are still suffering. So, to all survivors, keep your circle small, and store your memories in your heart, not on your feed.
Very powerful and well said!!!
Yes they care that you aren’t still in the emotional black hole… but they don’t ’care’ anything about you and never did…and never will…
They put you on the shelf and if you move forward with your life and escape from their shelf and if you meet someone else,oh boy their emotional punching bag escaped from their shelf, they don't like it at all, remember one thing your happiness is their disappointment 👍 Jess thanks for the video 💯
Thank you Gary for always being so supportive of what I do and giving me such kind words!
I can't explain how helpful your videos are to me. It feels like I am having a support, without which I would have gone insane. Thanks a lot.
I was hoovered several times. Each time it was because he needed something. He said he missed me and loved me. Bahahahaha he doesn’t know what love is. He’s someone else’s problem now. I told him to go to hell and it caused a narcissistic injury because he knows that’s exactly where he’s going.
The same thing happened to me, during one hoover he told me he needed someone who understands him, guess his new supply didn’t get him and dumped him as it was only 6 weeks after I ended it. In the end I told him to leave me alone, his reply “you leave me alone” that made me laugh he always hoovered and bothered me. He’s blocked now and hopefully will leave me alone but I doubt it 🤦♀️
@@catlady6938 yea they always come back. I’ve blocked him on everything as well. I worry he will come to my apartment as he has before. He caught me getting out of my car one night. So I look out for him when I pull in. He just wants to use me. I’m over that.
@@Thergirl666 mine is the same he just wants to use me too, he sometimes goes where I meet up with friends I tried to avoid him and he hangs around waiting for me to turn up, I just ignore him. They are mad people, stay safe.
@@catlady6938 you stay safe too❤️
The trick is not to care if they care. Just take care of yourself. That’s all the care you need. Nobody needs Narc care as Narc care is not caring as you all know………
I have had complete no contact policy even though we have two teen kids. I’ve found that after all of these years, I love being alone
Yep mine disappeared too. No Hoover. I was right about his multiple supplies and finally leaving.
I love my solitude.
No narcissist can harm me.
My covert narc actually said "have a wonderful day" in this cheery tone after I broke up with him. Had to see him a couple times after to pick up his things and he acted so nonchalant that it was irritating and creepy. He was carrying on like nothing happened and text on Monday morning, "hope you have a great week." That's when I had to stonewall him. I think he was employing a game to hurt me even more. That and I'm 99% sure he was cheating with an ex so maybe he was just relieved he could go be with her now. The truth is, I don't know and I don't really care. I'm grateful to be rid of the dysfunction, but I'll catch myself really wanting answers and details sometimes and I have to remember that I'll probably never get them and the important thing is that I'm rid of that bullshit for good and I have zero desire to be with him anymore. As a side note, I'm positive in the last weeks of our relationship, he was having sex with someone and coming over and crawling into my bed, still smelling of it. The level of disrespect and nastiness is a good repellent on any fantasies of getting back together. It's easier to get over them when you realize you were just a big game to them. They have no real feelings or empathy. Covert narcs are hard to spot though. He was the last person I expected to be a narc. Kind, thoughtful, good listener etc. Boy, was I wrong and I'm just upset at myself for not seeing the red flags sooner. Good luck to you all in your healing journeys.
I got through very similar situation. I wish you well. What narcs do is only cause wounds, they do it on purpouse and when they suppousedly apollogize they are slashing us againg in those wounds to hurt even more. Their morals are a mocking copie of that one of a child, they remember you the dammage done as a ressentment to mark "you didnt loved me as i needed and as i wanted". A terrible tauntrum wraped in fake good manners. Theyre nutcases. Perceiving that attitute is like looking directly to the void.
Thank you for sharing your story. My ex narc screamed “ IT AIN’T ABOUT YOU”! I was shocked because I simply reminded her that BOTH of our feelings mattered in the relationship. And we had to be considerate of how we treat one another. She hit every stereotype of a narcissist. Victim hood, lying, cheating , devalue and demonic mind games. After YEARS of gaslighting me about not teaching her how to drive and blaming me for her adult decisions. Regardless, I still loved her and wanted her see her grow. I made it my mission to teach her as I noticed she was making a sincere effort to learn. Literally for almost every day for a year I gave her my confidence, patience, love and time to teach her the lifelong art of driving. Months later I found out she using those same skills to drive over another man house to have a whole relationship on me. She is a true monster and I have been traumatized by her cheating and lies.
@@100nation5 I'm so sorry to hear that. My narc definitely used me too and it makes it worse that he came across so caring and giving in the beginning. Pretty soon he was constantly trying to drive my car when he has his own damn car, telling me I'm moving too fast after wanting a commitment after 2 months of dating, then proceeds to want to move in after 3 months. Lol screwing his ex the whole time.... ugggh. I'm free now. I hope you can find healing in your mess my dear
@@beatrixbrennan1545 Thank you for your sincere message. I’m sooo srry to hear that your ex used you in that matter. I sincerely hope you have FULL closer n your life dealing with him. He seemed like a complete douch bag of a human being. Karma is like a clock it comes back around. As a narc survivor I am here for you.
@@100nation5 you know it's funny, I woke up this morning feeling much better about the whole situation. I just had this gut feeling that there would be such good karma for him. I'm a Christ follower so it's more of reaping what they've sewn, but definitely.... God will get him!!
I always suspected something was wrong with my ex. She was so so so image conscious in my marriage. She had to have the very best clothes, all of the beauty treatments and cosmetic surgeries (breast) and capped teeth. I get that women want to feel beautiful but this was so over the top. I considered it vanity to an extreme. She also seemed to have no concern or interest in me and my interests or desires. She loved bombed me hard in the beginning and I really fell for it. She mirrored my hobbies early as I was an avid runner, golfer and hiker. She seemed to love those things too. But that was until we were married. Then all that fell away. I never have felt so loved by a woman ever early in the relationship. She rushed the relationship and the "I love you-s" and then the live together, the engagement and then the marriage and kids. It was a vortex of change that made my head spin. Once the kids came, things really changed. I was no longer important except for what I could do for her. Covering with the kids so she could advance her career or travel for work. Not that I shouldn't do that. I was happy to do that for our family. I have no regrets for that. But it became clear this was a 1-way street and there was no appreciation expressed by her for anything I contributed to our family. It was expected and there was no desire from her to help me improve my career or explore my interests. I was only of value for what I brought to the relationship and the family and as time went along, my value in her eyes dropped and dropped.
I take full accountability for feeling bad about myself. I allowed myself to accept her opinion of me as the true value I held of myself. I did this. Not her. I tried very hard to hold onto my self worth but I was so connected to her emotionally that she overwhelmed me with her personality. Ultimately I caved to her. In the end I felt as though I had no value or even negative value when she withdrew all of her emotion from me. I was a vacuum desperately seeking validation and getting nothing from my wife. It was where she wanted me to be. I was powerless to affect her and she could demand anything from me and I honor her. Until one day. She wanted to separate our finances and I said ..."that is enough". I had had enough. I immediately separated our financial assets and asked her for a divorce. I caught her off guard. She didn't expect that. She didn't have her escape plan in place yet. Her next supply had not yet been groomed. She was stuck. I was in a power position. We progressed through the divorce process and I held my ground and remained in a power position. I felt okay.
But then after 10 months after divorce she called to inform me that she was going to start dating. I had not felt ready for that. For whatever reason, that triggered hidden trauma and I was suicidal in just 12 hours and had to be committed to a psychiatric hospital for my protection. All the power shifted back to her. Now I am fighting to get back. Its been really hard.
Yes oh my goodness went thru EVERY type of abuse imaginable and when he found out I was elevating as you say he was pulling out his love bomb tricks! But of course im (trying) to stay no contact 💪💪
Thanks Jess, going through this horrible mess one step at a time. Dont know what I would be doing if i hadnt acces to channels like this. 👍❤ you are helping people all around the planet. Cheers from🇲🇽
In my case he came back the first time he found out I started dating again (six months after I left him) and he hoovered a second time when I finally got hired in my dream job (almost a year later). He never appeared when my father passed away so I considered them attempts to bother me because he knows I can’t stand him and probably wanted to ruin the occasion. Even though he’s always been blocked he finds a way to try it directly once then indirectly a couple of times before he finally disappears again. I already went through the brutal smear campaigns so I just ignore him. What else is he gonna say? He already said it all and those who chose to believe him I no longer associate with. Life’s natural filter 🤷🏻♀️
What you were talking about reminded me of the time my ex narc husband put a particular TV show on the TV and then proceeded to go outside and Mow 2 Acres which took hours. When he got back in hours later he asked me if I watch that TV show? I said no I had changed it to another show. He got Furious that I didn't watch the show that he would have watched if he had not been outside mowing for hours.
You’ve really helped me and a few of my friends out over the past week since I discovered your videos and shared with them! You are a GEM 💎 thank you for your time, research and advice! ❤️💪🏽
Thank you so much! I'm so glad I've been able to help! Stay strong ❤💪
I also think: reaching out for Exes after some time, is due to feeling, bad , lonely, no supply, bored, desperate etc. and this accounts not only for narcissists.
Hi Jess. I am unsubscribing from your channel only because thanks to you and many others like you I have been able to move on. There are some things I still have to work on, but for the most part I have been able to heal. So I feel that part of moving on is also putting this information aside since I have learned it by heart. And being notified about new videos is only reminding of how hurt I used to be. I really hate to do this but I feel like is something healthy and necessary. Thank you so much for being such a blessing to people like me and don't give up the good work. Best wishes to you.
I broke up with my Narc a week after marriage for cheating on me with my groupmate and found out there were others.. I tried to divorce him but the court said I had to wait 3 months. He didn't try to sweet talk me or anything until the last week of the 3rd month.
He had the nerve to say he's fighting for his marriage, I told him maybe just maybe if you apologized we could've move forward, from this day he hasn't apologized. The 3rd month came and he refused to sign the papers, knowing I was going out of the country.
I left the country came back 3 months later he locked me out of my own home!! He changed all the locks but accused me of changing the lock, when I left the country I turned off my phone because he wouldn't stop calling me. He told all my family members and friends that I locked him out the house and is cheating on him with 2 guys.
I come back home thinking I was unable to get into my home, so I contacted the landlord, the landlord didn't want anything to do with it because the Narc threatened him. My landlord advised me to move because he said that man is going to hurt you. I told the landlord I just need all my things so he would need to change the locks, call the police or get the key. The landlord refuses, so I learned the landlord is his uncle and they're working together.
Eight months has gone by and I walked away from everything so I thought. The narc text with paperwork saying me and him are being sued by the landlord, that I need to fly home to handle this because he doesn't like dealing with drama (everything was him) I knew it was a lie because I was the only one on the lease, so why would he be getting sued.
The landlord wanted his property back and said I abandoned his property and he's suing me for that and 6k in electricity. Another tactic by the Narc. I still had 3 months left until my lease was up and proof I didn't abandoned the place as I was locked out for 8 months. The landlord knew he didn't have a leg to stand on, so he said come get you items and I will give you 8k back on your rent (I paid a year upfront), I didn't trust none of them so I told him when I get a military escort I will come.
I forgot to mention I moved on to another relationship. Me and my current partner and his brother went there to get my items, come to find out the locks were never changed he just told me that, the landlord said to my guy oh you're taking a person wife huh. My guy said no she was mines first we separated, she got with him, he abused her and didn't treat her right, so now she's back home where she'll be loved.
The landlord is trying to convince us to pay him to paint his home and pay the electric bill without proof of the bill, my guy told him you need to ask her husband your tenant, you know the one you tried to sue, he's financially responsible for her here in this country from what her permit says and why would you come after the women? The landlord gave us one hour to be in and out, his terms in order to get the 8k back in rent.
The narc damaged all my equipment and my clothes were destroyed! He also took off with the marriage certificates. It was a waste of money flying there. And the landlord never gave us the money back.
We fly back home, moved into a bigger home, life is going great!! We hired a lawyer to deal with the divorce, everything is great! The Narc started stalking us from other pages because he was block so he created fake accounts. My social media started to be hacked personal and business account, all got deleted a few times. The narc calls me stating he will be going to Afrochella and he will see us there. I thought how do he know we're going to Afrochella? He hacked my email and seen the tickets. 🎟 Now the threaten begins! He told me he will get me deported and shot the both of us. I told him I will call the police, he then said my uncle is head of the police and my sister is head of military. I contacted both his sister and uncle and told them I will be filing a claim on them because I will not be protected here and forward them his voice message. The narc called begging me to please don't do that they can lose their jobs I said hey you did this. Everyone moved on so I thought! The sister calls to tell me to come back home he's really hurting because you left him and is now in another relationship. I told her I don't know what he's tell you but we haven't been together since a week after the marriage, she was so surprised, she thought we recently separated, I told her no and sent her all the proof. That had him so mad because I exposed him, everyone thought we were still together and thought I was out the country for business. I told her I can't be with a person who can't take care of me. Before I moved to Africa from USA I thought we were building I told his sister come to find out he paid his college tuition with the money I sent him to register our business, I'm thinking me and him were going have but he was using me all along. The sister was shocked 😲 so she called him and this happened.
The narc started playing on my phone again, sending me videos and pictures of his new relationship (Supposedly) , I said congratulations but he kept texting me. I said for a person so happy in his relationship but your trying to give me all your time while laying next to your girl hmm, Sir please move on and sign the divorce papers.
It's a year later and I'm still fighting for this divorce!! 😔 I deleted all my social media platforms and went ghost!! 👻 Hopefully this divorce will be finalized soon so I can marry my true love!! My guy had enough and called him of course the coward never answered, but that stop the calls for now. It's crazy because no one believes me and he's a TH-camr 🤦🏽♀️ you would think he's nice like that in real life but he's the devil!! Maybe he will divorce me soon if y'all spam his comments with divorce Suhuyini let her free and move on!! Amaraba Africa is the page name!! He lied about everything, even having another wife. He recently texted my mother stating I'm going to come up missing 🤦🏽♀️This man is crazy and won't leave me and my family alone! 😢 The laws here are different, it can take up to 2 years for the divorce if he doesn't sign. I forgot to mention once I said I do sex stop and he started hitting me (Playing hitting me but hard like he really was trying to hurt me, which the hits hurted) and telling me no one will want me, this is after I found out about the cheating and wanted to divorce.
Sorry for the long story but please be careful and continue to heal!! I literally lost everything but gained freedom and a soulmate! ❤️ The only thing is I have bad anxiety now and high blood pressure!
Smile Jess. You’ve overcome the narcissist in your life. Thank you for putting this out there for people to learn and share our stories. I finally have peace in my life after a life time (40 years ) with the person I loved with all my heart. I wish I’d learned about all this sooner but I guess that’s life. Brighter days ahead keeps me smiling. Thank you again
Yeah the Hoovers started slowing up and the last one was after a year. Once they realize you are not a good source of supply they move on until they feel like you need to be reminded of who they are
Two weeks afther my ex was a total narc psyco she tought i had goten a new girlfriend and she changed completly it was the ms jecyl and ms hide moment. I was so shocked by the change that i could not lett her in, and when i explaned that i did not have a new girlfriend , just a new model for Photoshoot , she relaxed and pulled away again , but emotionaly i was pulled back in :(
Im in the process of cleaning mi mind. Its hard and its very difficult. Burning days fast, burning time, lockdown has everybody and everything stuck, im still feelling like a ghost doing rutine schedules but no great meaningful emotions to stack. Feel like being in a pause, a comma or in suspense...
I got a taunting email after i settled a court battle with my narc. I won the settlement but it was way less than i should have won. She then emailed me to taunt me. That was the one source that i forgot to block. I did not respond and hit the "block" function. I'm sure it bothered her that i didn't respond. So thankful to be away from her FOREVER!!!
True! I had a hedonism narky ex-husband, he did everything inaccessibility.. Drugs, Cigs,drinking, BIG tires on jeep, BIG TV...this was in 1990 before big tv were in style. Sweet guy, but I divorced him because of his spending.
When we separated he left me in an empty apartment basically. I bought a brand new house, shortly after the divorce. He was coming by my house showering me with flowers and balloons trying to get back into my life. I don't even know how he knew where I lived. We didn't have internet back in 1990.
I didn't take him back ( he wasn't that good in bed with liquor dick ) But it's true he wanted back in my life after I bought that house, he didn't want me.
Lol liquor dick love it sooo true limp liquor dick 🤣🤣
@@katrinamenzies9398 Have you ever noticed most of your narcissists are alcoholics or have a drinking problem. They so insecure that they have to drink or do drugs. ya know
@@katrinamenzies9398 True that!
He forgot I exist. His mistake is it gave me coping skills. I used to spiral but not anymore. When you hurt someone time and again they stop trying. I'm a non entity to him so I just live my life.
My narcissist ex husband did this, he was in a bar with his new supply and saw me with a guy I was seeing yrs after the marriage ended and bought this up in court and judge told him I was entitled to be out and I didn't have to stay at home forever, my ex husband steam came out through him at this statement I could see for myself that I was something he thought he owned me and didn't see what he had done to me and my children, it was actually scary, it's like he thought he could do what he wanted with all the women he had affairs with but I wasn't allowed to move on, he NO POWER OVER ME ANYMORE.
Another informative video. Thanks for sharing 👏
10 months and not a word.
Haven't moved or changed my number.
Ohhhh yes as soon as the narc seen i was happy and she tried every trick in the book to try and break me and my wife up and had the nerve to get pissed when she couldnt did it YOUR RIGHT! in that muts head i should have been in my house crying heaf down waiting for my old trash to come back around but now i know she's crazy because in her mind she really thinks that even after years pass that i would want her anywhere near me
Wow. Good content. Love your voice too.
I like that u talk about exceptions like how this can be done by loneky people. And how you end your vid. Happy day survivor!
Thanks for the help. 😊😊😊
He used to have my undivided attention, apparently I needed to be ‘punished’ so he gave me silent treatment. 5 days later, txt me to find out who I’m chatting with or sleeping with in the vilest language ever. He’s going to keep wondering. He’s got new supply, he can keep gathering stones.
I left 6 months ago (married almost 25 years) and I'm not so much being hoovered as being breadcrumbed. He doesn't have new supply (at least not one who has fallen for him, try as he may. But his wooing of her and going on holiday with her have me the push I needed to make the leap!) and he doesn't want me to divorce him. He'd have to fork over half of his fortune. I'm happy to keep things from getting ugly for now, as we still have a 14-year-old daughter to raise. I fear he'll get all icky if I divorce him (although I've got enough goods on him to ruin his reputation at work and with his family, but I'm keeping my cards close to my chest.).
Jess I don’t know how long it’s been since he went, but you could still be hoovered. I know a narcissist who did it after 30 years, once he knew he could he ghosted her. I know him well, he’s ensuring he always has a place to go if things go tits up while he’s messing his current Bo around.
Sorry to be the bearer of such news 🥴, but at least you can get a sick bag ready.
Haven’t finished listening yet, just made me think of something 👍🏻
The narcissist is an empty shell, they have to see you to know they exist, it could be that simple, when you look in the mirror and there’s nobody there, the only way you know you exist is to find someone that once loved you or even hates you, and get in front of them.
Its like a normal person pinching themselves
Nice to find you again Jess.🌷
Been gone 5 months after 5 years of dealing with her crap. She didn't hoover all she did was send a $5 spot me thru chime. Guess hoping I'd send it back but I went no contact
Leaving a Narc is nothing more than a huge inconvenience for them. That's it., bc now they may have" back up supply", but now they'll have to start all over again with having a main person in there life to shit on. 🤷🏻♀
I think depending on how easy of a person you are to manipulate (like I am), I'm sure they will try any means nesisary to keep tabs on you. One comment I read was absolutely rt, keep your circle small and don't post about your personal life on social media. I'm leaving at the end of this month. It's taken a whole year to be patient and plan. I'm going no contact and leaving state. 6 and a half hrs away. It's not been an easy thing to do, but I don't think I would have had the courage to actually move on with my plans if it weren't for videos such as this and reading what other's post about their experiences. I do however feel like I'm the "bad guy" for leaving even though he's the one that's done so much wrong to me. It's all really just so f'd up. 😞
going to be a year of NO CONTACT this coming end of june and this foo doesnt stop trying to hoover me, like bruh move on , go away
i wish he was like ur ex narc , flat out ignore me or try to, my ex narc doesnt stop
I still don't understand why narcissists still have pictures of some of us on their social media after Grey Rock, well for me its been over a year of Grey Rock⚔🛡, I wonder🤔🤔 because my brother told me recently and asked me why does the narcissist still have pictures of her and I together still on her Facebook gallery, after all that smear campaign painting me as a bad person, shes a covert narcissist by the way also she use to be my best friend.
Good morning Jess! 🌻 ironically, about two minutes before you notified us of your most recent video, the narcissist sent me a text message saying that she wanted to "stop by" and get some things that are being held in storage on my property! Yup, I think this is a case of "goods and services".... at this point it feels that I am simply an apparatus not only for her to store her stuff on my property, but, at her "beck and call" I will be receptive to her coming here.... oh well, after being used as a doormat for all these years, i'll live with another intrusion....Happy Sunday, Jess! Thank you so much, again! 💞
Hoovering time. Be careful.
@@frankdavf4599 I thought this might be some form of hoovering! 😈 thanks!
I've often thought when I've felt sad or lonely that going back to my Ex is NOT the answer to that problem. If anything, it'd be going back into the fire and I've been burnt so many times, I so want to be rid of the scars. 🍒
My situation is just odd. When I was young I had a crush/summer romance. I was devastated when I found out he had a girlfriend. He told me he would come back to me. I was turned off. Some years later he married another lady. She had been the school beauty queen. I forgot all about them. Years later, one of my relatives died and he contacted me. I didn't respond right away. I was busy, and then forgot about him. When I went to answer the message, I had been blocked. The whole thing was weird. I think he was offended that I had not been sitting home thinking about him.
Good video Jess
Yeah I’ve had the occasional Hoover but they are slowing up, the last one was after a year of no contact
I was never hoovered or stalked by my resent ex narc which great and fine by me. Im oving in and moving forward with my life.
A vulnerable narcissist can not handle rejection, if you do not respond they will move on
Hey Jess. I finally subscribed to your channel. I've been watching for a while but fell off for a while but I'm pleased to say that I'm in month # 15 since I have seen/ been with the ex-narc and even in the triggered moments, I haven't reached out to her and it's gets better. Thanks.
When my ex left she know the hardest thing for me was being away from my daughter. We agreed on 50/50 custody which is awesome, but now my ex is all the sudden a lesbian, living with her new supply and her step dad and her daughter(some real jerry springer shit🙄). But she has started to send me pics of all of them doing family stuff on her weeks. Is it normal for split parents to do that? It’s taking every bit of good natured energy I have to remain grey and respond only with a “👍”. These people are sick!
Jess I have a question. I work with my ex female narc. We we’re together 8 yrs and married only 8 months and divorced because she always accused me of cheating. She gave me the push/pull syndrome for almost 2 yrs after and the last time she told me our history together is finished. After I agreed because I was sick and tired of her toxic ways and moved on to someone else. She found out about it and saw my new love and I together. Since she gives me the Silent Treatment, she ignores my existence and avoids me wherever she can. Why do you think she acts this way?
Mine's sounds to be just like yours. On the Outs..Maybe because I called him out on 2 Big things at the end...lol...He was Shocked ...You would of thought he Saw a Ghost....lol
Mine did after a year and a half hoovered with a fake apology
Thanks Jess this was a really good one. Yeah he's pissed off with me cuz I won't let him cross my boundaries so I think he kicked his daughter out because like you said they have to go back to the ex's and things cuz they're lonely so yeah I feel like he's about to reach out to somebody and leave us alone
thank you!!
I have to share living with my ex narcissistic partner , complicated why but now two years .He has met somebody lately and I am glad he did before me (too busy healing ha) but I find it hard his meeting somebody because of the trickery you know you have endured is all being played out the exact same way ... same texts same compliments same everything its so odd thinking how they are back in the lovebombing saddle ...and even a bit of pain even though I know now it wasn't love he was capable of only control and manipulation and abuse but still when you are blind to it like the new supply is at the moment ,well you remember how good it felt in ignorance I guess and wow yes he was good at it ... she will be worse off too as he is living with me and imagine the games he will play
My narc is remarried. He AND his bride continue to harass me. They have done things I can't even creatively make up. They have involved the two boys we have together and tried to alienate them from me. It's insane. I caught them cheating, I filed for divorce, they got married 2.5-3 years later and they will not leave me alone. It's insane.
Is a narcissist similar to a sociopath? Your advice seem applicable to a person related to me who is a sociopath.
Haven't cared since the last message I have sent to " make peace" check about them and abandon the resentment..I wondered a bit why no message before I contacted back and quite felt the coldness in the reply. Last message I have sent was a question which never received any answer and then it has been a year and a half since then.I have heard they have changed job on a press article (quite hurtful imo because I have cared when they exposed a bit of their problems to me/complained and I have realised I have just provided emotional support so I felt used for that in the end) but never directly from them.. so no there is no harassment on my part.
Just me feeling very resentful at times and the bitterness I can't deal with sometimes knowing that I was just being used and as it went quite far ( my reputation was demolished as I have received threats from her), it is been upsetting.
Show no emotion toward a narcissist. They really hate it. 😂
They come back to you to destroy you!
Another great video Jess. The narc i was dealing with doesn’t care about anything that has something to do with me that’s for sure, after all she called me the biggest mistake of her life so I guess she is gone for good what do you think?
I don't think we should ever say gone for good. I've had toxic people try and return years after dealing with them. Never say never is a good philosophy to adopt, in my opinion. Get as wise and strong as fast as you can. Hope for the best, prep for the worst.
@@JessStanley thanks for your quick answer but I’m all most positive about not being hoovered especially after a brutal smear campaign and her whole family seeing me as the crazy person furthermore I also exposed her but I will remember what you are saying 🙂
I went no contact for two months and he keeps beeping his horn from his bike .i pay it no mind ..im done!!!
I was discarded a little over a year ago and I have never been hoovered. Why might that be? There was no narcissistic injury.
It's rare to never be hoovered. I always say if you haven't been hoovered, you haven't waited long enough. However! Don't wait! Make the decision today that they aren't allowed back in your life! Don't wait for them to choose. You choose who is in your life and who has no place there!
Think of it as a blessing you have not been hoovered, mine has hoovered me around 7 times I know that’s usually the limit so hopefully that’s it now, but I’m not holding my breath 🤦♀️
I've been with a narc for about a year and half. I found out he had a live in girlfriend. How does the supply work in this case? How does "more value" work in a case like this? He introduced me to his kids and family, he got my name Tattooed on him all while he lived with his girlfriend. I'm confused. Anybody have some input for me? I'm confused..
Wat wen the new supply is very low grade
He is busy with his NS. So far he leaves me be. Thank god. I got hoovered 2 times in 14 months.
why are my family narcs and why don't they have my best interest
💗
So the last me won’t ever hurt me bc he has thousands of supply on social media and not counting friends or pasts women by the way he only cares about women with tattoos low clase. He won’t Hoover me he has enough supply and I don’t care I’m better now
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