NTA. After the way OP's sister and parents are treating her, I might not attend the wedding altogether. Screw them all. She should go out of town that weekend.
You're trying to help and be there for her, but she felt it was too much, so she removed you from the bridal party but still wants you to do the work for that role. She's being selfish. Even though it's her wedding, it gives her no right to be rude. Removing you from the bridal party hurt your feelings, but it's her wedding, so that's fine. However, if she still wants you to plan this as if you're part of the bridal party even though you're not, something about it feels like you're just being used.
These people who want their cake and eat it too really grate on my nerves. And the "put up with their shenanigans and be the bigger person" enablers are the worst kind of people. No! You do not have to allow another person to treat you like something they stepped on. You deserve to be respected and treated accordingly. They do not have the right to dictate how you should feel. They are not you. Good on you for standing up for yourself - it's called having dignity.
Not only dropping her to the help, but UNPAID help. I'd suggest she start charging for her help, but we all know she'd then be painted as greedy. She should probably try, "When I was a bridesmaid, I did as bridesmaids' work. Now I'm no longer a bridesmaid, you think me wicked for not doing bridesmaids' work. Sis should make up her mind, but at this point, I don't think I'm going to be able to take up those duties again. Since filling them is why sis told me I was overstepping as a bridesmaid... Why should I endure her double standards on helping her? She's ungrateful for the help I gave willingly. Now she expects me to do the work of a bridesmaid, but without the honor of BEING a bridesmaid. If she only wanted a wedding planner, she should pay for one. And I'm not offering anymore."
Hello girlfriend, step back be glad that you don’t have to do the work breathe and leave it all up to her because whether anybody believes it or not, you are being used and abused
She kicks you out for being over bearing but wants you to keep doing what you were doing. Make her tell you the truth before you do anything else. If she wants one of her girlfriends to be maid of honor then she should be honest and say so.
No! You are not in the wrong! Whoever she is going to be the brides maid let her do it! Don't help with anything! That's her problem! And if parents think she needs help, tell them to help!
NTA. Your sister acts like a spoiled and insecure person at the same time. You are not her therapist. If she can't show any signs of respect she doesn't deserve a free wedding planner.
NTA - she got some cheeky, 4 droppin u like th@ n then expectin u 2 continue helpin out. U deserve an apology nt just from her but from everybody th@ takin ur side.
What exactly did the older sister expect from OP? It doesn't make sense to uninvite someone from your wedding for any reason but then still expect them to help as if they are still invited. She has no right to accuse OP of being selfish for saying "No" when really, SHE'S the one being selfish by trying to use her.
Not being unfair. She's cherry picking. I think you should tell the Bride you would be happy to continue to advise and suggest; but will withdraw from active task involvement, which is properly the role of the mother of the Bride and the girls in the bridal party, of which are no longer a part. (You are now a guest.) Moreover try telling her you are simply respecting her reasons for downsizing. You don't want to be seen to be overbearing or to be making things about yourself. You might even consider thanking her for the opportunity to assist in the earlier planning and that you look forward to seeing her at the ceremony.
If she wants a wedding planner, then she needs to pay for it. She wants to be able to boss her sister around and feel like she is in charge. She wants everything to always be about her, but once she realized that she does not have what it takes to do everything by her, that is when she wanted her sister back. Now family wants to bully the sister so they can feel like heros, as if they are the ones who saved the wedding. Don't do it. Set boundaries and don't budge. Some people need a real dose of reality. Actions have consequences.
Don't do it girl. Tell your parents that, if you're not gonna be there, you won't do anything more for your entitled sibling. She wants it planned she either gets a professional (expensive), let's you attend her nuptials or does it herself. No way is she getting free help from a sister she's banned. 😮
Go NC with this brideziilla and parents also!!!!!! Definitely Do Not go to the wedding!!!! Completely disappear that weekend so they can't find you or contact you in anyway!!!!!!
Not wrong at all. They are just trying to take advantage of you and your talents without giving any sort of return for your investment of time,talent, and effort.
![[FULL STORY] My Brother’s Fiancée Demands My Inheritance, And My Parents Agree.](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/gxIFqmAFT10/mqdefault.jpg)
![[FULL STORY] My Brother’s Fiancée Demands My Inheritance, And My Parents Agree.](/img/tr.png)
![[ ออกกอง ] วัยหนุ่ม 2544 โลกหลังลูกกรง..ทัวร์กองถ่ายหนังใน "คุกของจริง" | JUSTดูIT.](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/vB--aOkZCpw/mqdefault.jpg)
No you are not wrong. Dont be used and taken advantage of
OPs sister: you're too overbearing
Also OPs sister: keep helping
NTA. After the way OP's sister and parents are treating her, I might not attend the wedding altogether. Screw them all. She should go out of town that weekend.
You're trying to help and be there for her, but she felt it was too much, so she removed you from the bridal party but still wants you to do the work for that role. She's being selfish. Even though it's her wedding, it gives her no right to be rude. Removing you from the bridal party hurt your feelings, but it's her wedding, so that's fine. However, if she still wants you to plan this as if you're part of the bridal party even though you're not, something about it feels like you're just being used.
Okay we're not gonna question the cat flashing in the lightening? Bro was batman-
You mean, batcat?
Or Catman!
@oonachestnut509 CATMANNNNN
These people who want their cake and eat it too really grate on my nerves. And the "put up with their shenanigans and be the bigger person" enablers are the worst kind of people.
No!
You do not have to allow another person to treat you like something they stepped on. You deserve to be respected and treated accordingly.
They do not have the right to dictate how you should feel. They are not you.
Good on you for standing up for yourself - it's called having dignity.
She wants to used you, your parents are no good either. Go and have fun with your friends in the same day.
You are not wrong. She dropped you from the wedding party and is still expecting you to help???? NFW she's being TA
Not only dropping her to the help, but UNPAID help. I'd suggest she start charging for her help, but we all know she'd then be painted as greedy.
She should probably try, "When I was a bridesmaid, I did as bridesmaids' work. Now I'm no longer a bridesmaid, you think me wicked for not doing bridesmaids' work. Sis should make up her mind, but at this point, I don't think I'm going to be able to take up those duties again. Since filling them is why sis told me I was overstepping as a bridesmaid... Why should I endure her double standards on helping her? She's ungrateful for the help I gave willingly. Now she expects me to do the work of a bridesmaid, but without the honor of BEING a bridesmaid. If she only wanted a wedding planner, she should pay for one. And I'm not offering anymore."
@cchastant8251 you are exactly right!!
Hello girlfriend, step back be glad that you don’t have to do the work breathe and leave it all up to her because whether anybody believes it or not, you are being used and abused
She kicks you out for being over bearing but wants you to keep doing what you were doing. Make her tell you the truth before you do anything else. If she wants one of her girlfriends to be maid of honor then she should be honest and say so.
RESPECT ✊
NTA your sister and parents are for not respecting you. If it was me I wouldn't go to the wedding
I'd be out of the country that weekend. Leave Wednesday and return the following Tuesday.
No! You are not in the wrong! Whoever she is going to be the brides maid let her do it! Don't help with anything! That's her problem! And if parents think she needs help, tell them to help!
Nta.....why she still want you to do the work if you're so overbearing....tell her that....ignore those talking sht.....
Nah, that shi disrespectful. Good for stepping back
Oh honey, so very sorry you are going through this. It really sucks to be used and gaslighted like that. You are NTA, but your sister and parents ARE.
NTA. Your sister acts like a spoiled and insecure person at the same time. You are not her therapist. If she can't show any signs of respect she doesn't deserve a free wedding planner.
NTA - she got some cheeky, 4 droppin u like th@ n then expectin u 2 continue helpin out. U deserve an apology nt just from her but from everybody th@ takin ur side.
That cat is the villain 💀
What exactly did the older sister expect from OP? It doesn't make sense to uninvite someone from your wedding for any reason but then still expect them to help as if they are still invited. She has no right to accuse OP of being selfish for saying "No" when really, SHE'S the one being selfish by trying to use her.
Not being unfair.
She's cherry picking.
I think you should tell the Bride you would be happy to continue to advise and suggest; but will withdraw from active task involvement, which is properly the role of the mother of the Bride and the girls in the bridal party, of which are no longer a part. (You are now a guest.)
Moreover try telling her you are simply respecting her reasons for downsizing. You don't want to be seen to be overbearing or to be making things about yourself.
You might even consider thanking her for the opportunity to assist in the earlier planning and that you look forward to seeing her at the ceremony.
Get away from her, she needs to learn she can't have things both ways and you need space and time to regain perspective and know how to move forward!
The moh helps with the planning not a person to the side
If she wants a wedding planner, then she needs to pay for it. She wants to be able to boss her sister around and feel like she is in charge. She wants everything to always be about her, but once she realized that she does not have what it takes to do everything by her, that is when she wanted her sister back. Now family wants to bully the sister so they can feel like heros, as if they are the ones who saved the wedding. Don't do it. Set boundaries and don't budge. Some people need a real dose of reality. Actions have consequences.
LET THE POOR CAT IN 😭
FR 😭
Oh sorry, sis! I'll be away that weekend.
In the end, are we truly close to the people we think we are close to?
Don't do it girl. Tell your parents that, if you're not gonna be there, you won't do anything more for your entitled sibling. She wants it planned she either gets a professional (expensive), let's you attend her nuptials or does it herself. No way is she getting free help from a sister she's banned. 😮
While she's getting married I'd be on Vacation! Having my own Honeymoon. 😅😢😢
Go NC with this brideziilla and parents also!!!!!! Definitely Do Not go to the wedding!!!! Completely disappear that weekend so they can't find you or contact you in anyway!!!!!!
Your right not wrong
Not wrong at all. They are just trying to take advantage of you and your talents without giving any sort of return for your investment of time,talent, and effort.
😂Why kick her out if you're gonna kick her out her parents are treating sarah as a gold child 😅 your not the bad guy
No since ur paying for stuff u can return it all
Nope just got contact with her and your parents
No
Nope! She is awful
So sick of hearing be the bigger person.
Yeah , do all the work, but don’t get the credit or respect. And you are the rotten one for not letting her walk all over you.
She is just using you, and your parents are using you to