“They did a blood test and-“ “Congratulations, youre HIV positive!!” “They didn’t tell me that.” “They’re keeping it from you?” They have the best banter
7:36 and here we can hear the elusive E-4's mating call, its anguished cries echoing in the irradiated night, due to rapidly changing conditions in OSHA regulation and furniture placement, this species has quickly led itself to extinction
You don’t understand man the Woobie is the ultimate blankie, it keeps you warm in the winter and cool in the summer, it has mild water protection and has a cool Camo pattern.
The better the friend/the more comfortable you are with them, the worse/more degenerate things you'll say to them. I have friends that I barely even tell them they look nice today, and then I have my best friend, who I have told at least twice that I'd gladly pin her to a wall if I had the chance (half-jokingly).
I am recovering from an appendix surgery. It hurts to cough or laugh. But here I am, laughing my arse off in pain. And you know what? TOTALLY WORTH IT!!
@@cursedgaraged5801 Depends on a type of podcast. I certanly hate podcasts with like watching a black screen or a logo for half an hour. Yeah, you need to listen, but I dunno, I just dislike that format. But podcasts like this episode - I'll gladly take
Be me: 25m Multi-Media illustrator in the Army. Goes to joint base with Marine equivalent. Proceeds to wonder where all my crayons are. Oh right. Marines.
Fun story from my high school. We were in the indoor pool, and everyone started coughing really bad. I got out of the pool, and almost blacked out. We all ran out as fast as we could. Every breath you tried to take, you would immediately start to cough again. Turns out the vents had seized shut, and the chlorine dispenser for the pool broke. The entire room was just chlorine gas. Somehow, nobody died.
Ah the poncho liner... One of the many things CIF gave me I have yet to use. On a related note, I hated hand washing my camies with a scrub brush. Was a pain in the ass.
I have been watching these guys three years but I dont understand how this channel still so underrated? Almost three years but they still dont have 100 k but instead of they deserve at least 1 million sub. By the way, I can watch this channel to end of my life and I never miss any part of Fallout New Vegas.
Alperen Çetin same man I just don’t get it this series is gold and all it is is two friends being bros do you think they should try the same thing with kenshi?
7:35 I know your pain , I was trying to take a magazine out of a paintball gun and as it finally got loose I pulled it full force right towards my delicate man's area
Once got nailed in the groin with a piece of weightlifting equipment, but I didn’t feel to much because a 25lb weight fell and knocked me out almost immediately
@@AgentTasmania maybe, but would still be entertaining. I know little about guns and dunno where to even start history and function wise. so it would be neat to learn from somewhere i know that entertains me
*Grabs Guitar* "Let's gather round the campfire and sing our campfire song. Our C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G Song! And if you don't think that we can sing it faster then you're wrong , but it'll help if you just sing along".
Used this video to save my family's life today. They didn't realize the symptoms of CO poisoning until zach described them. I'm so glad I watched this and didn't let people just go to sleep. It's 1:30am rn and I'm keeping my window open to keep me and my sister safe from the deadly gas lol.
I remember my grandpa went to the hospital for a breathing test. He drove himself there, filled out the forms, went in the room and all that, nurse took blood samples, did the test and was going to leave when the doctor stopped him looking like he saw a ghost and said “You need to stay, your blood-oxygen is at 50.” My grandpa said “it can’t be that bad, I drove here and I was fine.” The doctor went white and stuttered “Most people would pass out at 70 and your still DRIVING!!” And that’s the story about how my grandpa was on oxygen for 6 months before getting a pacemaker.
I've heard from other vets that the sergeants are often having to teach their people how to do basic things like laundry or taxes because they were never taught by their parents, and they don't have the benefit of being able to call their parents whenever like if they had gone to college.
Got my GF a Woobie with a DD-214 printed on it. It's now her favorite blanket, because she can wrap up in it and it protects her from all the bullshit.
Well...hey, Mike, since you said you had to hand-wash everything in the marines, mind giving me some pointers? XD And poor Zach...always injuring himself. Somebody give him his woobie!
So I was getting up for school one morning, 9th grade. The adage, "did you get dressed in the dark?" Applied literally. And in my semi-conscious daze, lumbered to the bus stop, then I realized, "woops, forgot to brush my teeth" so I ran back home, and in the bathroom flipped on the light and saw the shirt I was wearing wasn't mine. It was one of my mom's, who'd accidentally mixed one of her shirts in with mine when doing the wash. It was a pink shirt that said "It started with a kiss, and ended up like THIS" with an arrow pointing down to the belly. I can't imagine having not killed myself had I gone to school that day. I was saved in a dozen ways by dental hygiene. It was also the day I decided firmly, "I am from now on doing my own fucking laundry" Actually true story. I'm dead inside, someone please murdercide me.
At points in my life I've been in a state where the only thing that could help me was a soft toy and/or blanket, good to know that I had a woobie deficit
So I showed this to my grandmother during a roadtrip. She used to be a nurse before she retired, and said that yes Zach, you should've gone to the hospital, immediately. The concetration of oxygen in the air wouldn't have been enough to displace the CO, and you could've easily died in your sleep
This is the hardest ive laughed in a loong time. Plus, please tell me im not the only one that thinks Zach sounds like john tron after hitting his balls when he says "I didn't mean to".
Seriously, Woobies are the best ever. My brother got out 2 years ago and he hung his Woobie up in his room as a background to his pictures he took in the sandbox
I love your guys weird, rediculous stories. Also, I just realized that you need a navy vet and an air force vet and play New Vegas and you'll have video gold.
Ive legit just sat through all of zachs stories like he's ducking hallarious, I'm sad he doesn't have like a series of videos on his channel about his army stories haha
Holy shit, this was so awesome, I cant express it with words. This the only reason I watch most of your stuff, a butch of real good army(or, marine) stories. That's just something you don't see to often.
Where I live in Ontario Canada, in an apartment, theres no Gas appliances or machines in the building as its all electric heating and cooking, so I dont really need any kind of detectors aside from smoke detectors.
Reminds me if when I got carbon monoxide poisoning. My CO was 22. I was the same way, not wanting to go to the hospital because America. I just wanted to sleep it off because I was under the impression that it was Propane instead of Carbon Monoxide (not that it’s any better, but I have been around propane before without incident when I was young, so I never knew how bad it was. I was stupid enough to just shrug it off). If my gf hadn’t insisted I go, I wouldn’t have woken up ever again. I realize that this is a year late, but I only just discovered you 😅😆
We had a person who was like 16-17 at work who didn't know how to operate a washer way back - I doubt it's uncommon to know someone who has no idea how to operate one I hope you make this a series of its own, the stories you guys have are only made even better with the judgement you give each other
Zach: “I am not that smart”
*5 seconds later, hits himself in the testicles*
Self fulfilling prophecy. He thought he was stupid so he did something stupid
I actually felt that moment
he proved his point
Andrew Penix lol
@@wokedog1799 same but it's my lungs nit getting enough air!
"No guys you don't understand, this glue tastes really good" - Marine Corps slogan, 2003-present
i think you mean 1775
It pairs wonderfully with this box of crayons!
“Guys you don’t understand, this glue smells frickin amazing”
god i fucking love eating glue
Oyoyoy, what about these old ass MREs?! Add`em to the blender!
When Zach realises he can't kill himself to get out of a relationship he immediately tries to make himself sterile
I nearly spat out my water seeing this
@@operleutnant7235 Lucky you, i was drinking coffee when i read that.
@@Juicewski2 Vodka, through the nose, it burns.
I looked in the comments the moment he hit his nuts and saw your comment
@@beastmachine0955Spoilers, man.
“They did a blood test and-“
“Congratulations, youre HIV positive!!”
“They didn’t tell me that.”
“They’re keeping it from you?”
They have the best banter
Thats best friends
I love these guys specifically for this reason. They banter like the bestest of friends and it's SO relatable.
"I don't think I'm HIV+."
"How many monkeys have you had sex with recently?"
@@charliebear2048 NONE!
@@StealthTheFoxz And that would be AIDS!
“Cause it’s a blankie” I’m dyin
He ain't wrong tho
I felt that statement on an emotional level.
As I am wrapped up in mind right now.
7:36 and here we can hear the elusive E-4's mating call, its anguished cries echoing in the irradiated night, due to rapidly changing conditions in OSHA regulation and furniture placement, this species has quickly led itself to extinction
Pfffft
*soft classical music plays as Zach cries out in pain, and Mike laughs*
@@devinmcleod3395 moonlight sonata intensifies...
When zach was talking about a woobie and said it was a blankie my heart melted.
And wh3n he said "cause its a blankie" my heart melted to little bits
Same.
You don’t understand man the Woobie is the ultimate blankie, it keeps you warm in the winter and cool in the summer, it has mild water protection and has a cool Camo pattern.
@@drewbeauchesne1116 and paired with the pt belt keeps the badies away when it's dark.
there is something very wholesome about a mid 30's year old man crying for his blankie
@@drewbeauchesne1116 EXACTLY THO I HAVE MY DAD’S OLD WOOBIE AND ITS AWESOME
“Did you injure yourself on the chair?”
*”I hit myself in the testicles.”*
*Hysterical Laughter*
*Inhuman screams of pain*
Sounded like a pterodactyl
The next Jurassic park movie is going to use his scream for all the dinosaurs. lol
Do you NOT laugh at one of the bois when they accidentally commit ball hit
I’ve actually been hit in the balls before, and let me tell you: it is not fun
@@S117M4sterChief WHO DIDN'T?
This should be a series on your channel Zach and Mike campfire stories with special guest hope
I agree with this
@@MrPie-vc4ux I agree as well
Im with you my dude. Instead of a podcast. Just this. This is quite nice.
Yes its funny. Zach bust your nuts again that was funny.
i personally like this idea
zach's actual girlfriend is just cass isn't she?
Probably
No it's TALI
Why not both?
@@artarion6191
Tali Cass Normamdi
The Shoebill bodypillow
7:21 You see, a *normal* friend would've commiserated. As *good* friends, it's Mike's solemn duty to give Zach a hard time for this.
The better the friend/the more comfortable you are with them, the worse/more degenerate things you'll say to them. I have friends that I barely even tell them they look nice today, and then I have my best friend, who I have told at least twice that I'd gladly pin her to a wall if I had the chance (half-jokingly).
I am recovering from an appendix surgery. It hurts to cough or laugh. But here I am, laughing my arse off in pain. And you know what? TOTALLY WORTH IT!!
Totally but what happened
@@okiedragon2153 well... its the appendix. Probably an appendectomy, or however you spell it.
You have the gift of prophecy
Honestly this would be an amazing podcast format. You two sitting at a camp, telling stories.
Who wouldn't love this!
@@cursedgaraged5801
Depends on a type of podcast. I certanly hate podcasts with like watching a black screen or a logo for half an hour. Yeah, you need to listen, but I dunno, I just dislike that format. But podcasts like this episode - I'll gladly take
@@steelbear2063 I'm sure that's what he meant, I understand what you're saying
like, a real campfire? that'd be cool.
needs the subtitles, too.
While they joke around and Zach busting his own nuts while Mike actually gets angry at him
Be me: 25m Multi-Media illustrator in the Army. Goes to joint base with Marine equivalent.
Proceeds to wonder where all my crayons are. Oh right.
Marines.
do crayons taste good? actually why am I asking that ima go find out myself
God damn Marines!
Eugen Say, what rank in the Marines are you, now?
@@memillionthdoot4436 I'm not in it, I'm genuinely asking if they're good.
@@chad6700 There not to bad better then some of the MREs they give us
"cuz it's a blankie"
I spat out my Dr pepper
I got an ad for dr pepper as soon as I saw this
Based pfp
"We have determined that Your brain damage is not service related" - VA
I love Zach's stories (and him sack tapping himself)!
Please do more of these i love hearing the conversations you two have. You could do a podcast of it, but as always great video
Agreed, id very much like to see more of this.
Twiin Chao2 I’m sure this was a podcast or something
Preffer the video... i need to see something or im gonna be distracted
I was crying of laughter when Zach hit himself in the testicles and now I feel bad
Fun story from my high school. We were in the indoor pool, and everyone started coughing really bad. I got out of the pool, and almost blacked out. We all ran out as fast as we could. Every breath you tried to take, you would immediately start to cough again. Turns out the vents had seized shut, and the chlorine dispenser for the pool broke. The entire room was just chlorine gas. Somehow, nobody died.
Ah the poncho liner... One of the many things CIF gave me I have yet to use.
On a related note, I hated hand washing my camies with a scrub brush. Was a pain in the ass.
I WANT MY WOOBIE! i feel that on spiritual level
its nice rewatching these videos in my current state. its like having friends again 😊
My favorite notification from TH-cam mikeburnfire
I have been watching these guys three years but I dont understand how this channel still so underrated? Almost three years but they still dont have 100 k but instead of they deserve at least 1 million sub. By the way, I can watch this channel to end of my life and I never miss any part of Fallout New Vegas.
Alperen Çetin same man I just don’t get it this series is gold and all it is is two friends being bros do you think they should try the same thing with kenshi?
@@Ty-dv5xf I didnt know this game before when you asked me but I think its ok with fallout nw so they shouldnt try.
Zach was just like “ya know what’s great for all this poison? more poison!”
7:35 I know your pain , I was trying to take a magazine out of a paintball gun and as it finally got loose I pulled it full force right towards my delicate man's area
Ow, man. I felt that even from where I am sitting
Once got nailed in the groin with a piece of weightlifting equipment, but I didn’t feel to much because a 25lb weight fell and knocked me out almost immediately
@@hitechartemovsk2472 I'm a chick and I still cringed
Stop injuring yourself to stay away from your girlfriend
Edit: THIS. WAS. AMAZING. 100/10
This is the closest thing we're going to get to a podcast and I love it
Oh boy am I glad that this turned out to be wrong. All hail the Burn Hazard podcast
I am really glad for this, i like just hearing about the crazy or weird stuff that happens. still want a lecture on gun types, uses, and history.
thestongestoftheweak His historic rants on those topics haven’t been the most accurate
@@AgentTasmania maybe, but would still be entertaining. I know little about guns and dunno where to even start history and function wise. so it would be neat to learn from somewhere i know that entertains me
You know it's gonna be a good video when you see that star.
what star?
@@kenmorashade7943 in the thumbnail
@@Lakita2880 it's a special star.
Let ollllll festus tell ya tale of the speeeeeecial star!
@@brosephnoonan223 Oh God...not Festus!
Hope sitting so paiently, such a loyal follower.
They just turned her off.
"Nobody calls it Toy Story 1, but it's Toy Story 1. We get it! " LMAO!
In Estonias military you have to wash your own laundry by hand for the first 3 months of basic. But nice stories guys, keep it up :)
*Grabs Guitar*
"Let's gather round the campfire and sing our campfire song. Our C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G Song! And if you don't think that we can sing it faster then you're wrong
,
but it'll help if you just sing along".
Bum bum buuummmm
C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E-S-O-N-G
Used this video to save my family's life today. They didn't realize the symptoms of CO poisoning until zach described them. I'm so glad I watched this and didn't let people just go to sleep. It's 1:30am rn and I'm keeping my window open to keep me and my sister safe from the deadly gas lol.
I remember my grandpa went to the hospital for a breathing test. He drove himself there, filled out the forms, went in the room and all that, nurse took blood samples, did the test and was going to leave when the doctor stopped him looking like he saw a ghost and said “You need to stay, your blood-oxygen is at 50.” My grandpa said “it can’t be that bad, I drove here and I was fine.” The doctor went white and stuttered “Most people would pass out at 70 and your still DRIVING!!”
And that’s the story about how my grandpa was on oxygen for 6 months before getting a pacemaker.
This crayon said peach so I thought it would taste yummy
why color stick taste no no?
This glue says wood glue, Why does it not taste like wood?
Waaaaait a minute, this is just a podcast with animations!
I had a woobie when i was little; a small blanket i carried with me everywhere.
I've heard from other vets that the sergeants are often having to teach their people how to do basic things like laundry or taxes because they were never taught by their parents, and they don't have the benefit of being able to call their parents whenever like if they had gone to college.
Can this be a regular thing? I love listening to your stories
This honestly just feels like the New Vegas LP minus New Vegas
Got my GF a Woobie with a DD-214 printed on it. It's now her favorite blanket, because she can wrap up in it and it protects her from all the bullshit.
Well...hey, Mike, since you said you had to hand-wash everything in the marines, mind giving me some pointers? XD
And poor Zach...always injuring himself. Somebody give him his woobie!
Hand washing in Marines confirmed. Sometimes we'd get a big stick to help swish it round. Those were good days.
Get a bucket, fill it with hot, soapy water, and get a plunger. Put your clothes in the bucket and use the plunger on it for a few minutes
So I was getting up for school one morning, 9th grade. The adage, "did you get dressed in the dark?" Applied literally. And in my semi-conscious daze, lumbered to the bus stop, then I realized, "woops, forgot to brush my teeth" so I ran back home, and in the bathroom flipped on the light and saw the shirt I was wearing wasn't mine.
It was one of my mom's, who'd accidentally mixed one of her shirts in with mine when doing the wash.
It was a pink shirt that said "It started with a kiss, and ended up like THIS" with an arrow pointing down to the belly.
I can't imagine having not killed myself had I gone to school that day. I was saved in a dozen ways by dental hygiene.
It was also the day I decided firmly, "I am from now on doing my own fucking laundry"
Actually true story. I'm dead inside, someone please murdercide me.
This is honestly the epitome of this channel's content and I APPROVE.
This was amazing I. Always love your military stories, best part of your shows
i love mikes cackle and zachs distant scream.
"The marines are stupid" Have fun washing your Woobie in the field for snuggle time when you have no power!
Reasons why you two should do a podcast: this video.
7:38 sounds like the xenomorph is back
At points in my life I've been in a state where the only thing that could help me was a soft toy and/or blanket, good to know that I had a woobie deficit
Zach is so funny to me, I genuinely like him more than I like myself. I laugh at pretty much everything that comes out of his mouth
Army gets a washer and dryer.
Marines get a basin full of delicious soapy water.
Air Force get a butler.
Navy just tosses their laundry overboard.
I loved my moms woobie. So warm. And it had strings on it, very good for blanket forts
I thought the woobie thing was a joke until i got one.
I can safely say.
Woobie is my fav blankie.
So I showed this to my grandmother during a roadtrip. She used to be a nurse before she retired, and said that yes Zach, you should've gone to the hospital, immediately. The concetration of oxygen in the air wouldn't have been enough to displace the CO, and you could've easily died in your sleep
that's nice to know,
@@theblade6696 I thought so too. Thank Zach's partner for caring about our boy
It was because of this video that I decided I needed my own woobie
Damn, I've had this *exact* same thing happen to me, the CO poisoning. It is exactly as I remember.
iva had to pause this video about 10 times because ive almost choked in my m&m's from laughing so much
I love how zach can go from being dead serious to being a little child
Your laughs are the best in combination with these stories thanks for your service guys and keep being awesome
i love these stories so much, both are you are such characters and it's awesome. keep doing what you're doing! much love
Oh, this is the best XD just Random stories with Mike and Zach.
I want more Zach and Mike like this podcast style I realy enjoyed that
We all need someone like Zach's girlfriend in our lives~
Not gonna lie, I go to sleep to all of the stories. It's the only thing I found that relaxes me enough.
*screaming in agony*
"yes?"
Totally normal response
Dude. A woobie is the best thing that the military has ever created. Well, one of the best. I mean these M65 field jackets are pretty nice
I could actually watch this for hours this was amazing, would love to see more of this in future for sure! You two are the best seriously
This is the hardest ive laughed in a loong time. Plus, please tell me im not the only one that thinks Zach sounds like john tron after hitting his balls when he says "I didn't mean to".
Only ppl who’ve known each other for 20+ years can get away with talking to each other like this 😂
"Cause it's a blankie"
Very adorable big cute 10/10 doing the subage
I love how i was wrapped up in my poncho liner as I watched it
Seriously, Woobies are the best ever. My brother got out 2 years ago and he hung his Woobie up in his room as a background to his pictures he took in the sandbox
Even a year later this is still gold
I love your guys weird, rediculous stories. Also, I just realized that you need a navy vet and an air force vet and play New Vegas and you'll have video gold.
Ive legit just sat through all of zachs stories like he's ducking hallarious, I'm sad he doesn't have like a series of videos on his channel about his army stories haha
"Cause it's a blankie. ( ;-;)"
Holy shit, this was so awesome, I cant express it with words. This the only reason I watch most of your stuff, a butch of real good army(or, marine) stories. That's just something you don't see to often.
The woobie makes everything better
This was definitely enjoyable.
Hand washing is the only way to get crayon stains out of clothes.
i love mikes cackle.
I think I loved this too much. Need more videos like this if possible!
Where I live in Ontario Canada, in an apartment, theres no Gas appliances or machines in the building as its all electric heating and cooking, so I dont really need any kind of detectors aside from smoke detectors.
Dude, make this a series, this is the best video ever
Those guys are GOLD, I'm so glad their channel is taking off! ~
I never heard this one gonna scour this playliat for ones i missed
man. you two are awesome. I absolutely LOVE your stories. They're some of the best parts about this show.
Reminds me if when I got carbon monoxide poisoning. My CO was 22. I was the same way, not wanting to go to the hospital because America. I just wanted to sleep it off because I was under the impression that it was Propane instead of Carbon Monoxide (not that it’s any better, but I have been around propane before without incident when I was young, so I never knew how bad it was. I was stupid enough to just shrug it off). If my gf hadn’t insisted I go, I wouldn’t have woken up ever again.
I realize that this is a year late, but I only just discovered you 😅😆
Hearing all this is so good! These are funny you should do episodes like this more when you can.
"It smells like gas in here. Let's light a candle!"
Story time with mike and zack the best time of the day
Ngl, I come back every now and again just to hear Zach's scream of agony and embarrassment
Can we please get more of these? This was actually pretty cool to listen to. Make it a Saturday thing.
If I ever need to write banter for some characters, this guys are right there on inspiration
This is the coolest, most oddly pleasing visual setup for a podcast I've ever seen.
So in conclusion, get a Geiger counter and a Carbon Monoxide detector
So Zach's story here saved my me and my family's life. Thanks dude hope you see this.
We had a person who was like 16-17 at work who didn't know how to operate a washer way back - I doubt it's uncommon to know someone who has no idea how to operate one
I hope you make this a series of its own, the stories you guys have are only made even better with the judgement you give each other