Bitlife but I'm a terrible Amish man

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ต.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 1.1K

  • @pagansbasin6657
    @pagansbasin6657 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8067

    Kevin’s hardest BitLife challenge: don’t become a terrible person

    • @oliclay1348
      @oliclay1348 2 ปีที่แล้ว +251

      I get giving video suggestions man. But they have to be realistic 😅

    • @MaiaMirabell
      @MaiaMirabell 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      *LOL*

    • @TheSoup87
      @TheSoup87 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      Me remembering his perfect person video

    • @Madladrifle
      @Madladrifle 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I dont think thats even possible

    • @frogchamp.
      @frogchamp. 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      Because of Kev, i started an family on bitlife that has lived on for about 150 years with 5 or 6 generations. First, i started a life of organized crime and had a child. When i die i take control of the childs life, marry somebody rich and old, have 1 to three kids, kill the person you married, and adopt the family job, the Latin Mafia. What's funny is, most the time when i take control of the child, they have a pretty normal life with normal jobs. (Photographer, Artist, etc.) And then i do the aforementioned things, ruin their life, and inevitably die in prison.

  • @mossrosemcc
    @mossrosemcc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5000

    I love that Kevin doesn't even wonder if murder is anti-amish

    • @user-qs3qf5lw9k
      @user-qs3qf5lw9k 2 ปีที่แล้ว +283

      Murder, the best equalizer of all manner of men.

    • @lexorwhatever4940
      @lexorwhatever4940 2 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      Just Kevin doing Kevin things!

    • @bobross547
      @bobross547 2 ปีที่แล้ว +80

      @@Thetaz_se and literally anti whoever is getting murdered

    • @finn4012
      @finn4012 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Or robbery

    • @danielbuddenmusic1502
      @danielbuddenmusic1502 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Joshua EdwinRoehl ?

  • @annekejacobs1270
    @annekejacobs1270 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4518

    *clubs his boss to death
    "Yay I found a way to go clubbing as an Amish person"
    I'm dying 😂

    • @annie_are_you_ok
      @annie_are_you_ok 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      it's pure gold

    • @aceeduventures
      @aceeduventures 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      th-cam.com/video/bev-dLoM4lc/w-d-xo.html
      держись солдаты 🇷🇺.

    • @lordben3787
      @lordben3787 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      The Boss was too

    • @lexorwhatever4940
      @lexorwhatever4940 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Dude I spit my water I died... So did his bo-

    • @louis8487
      @louis8487 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      You’re dying? I’m sorry that’s so sad.

  • @yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461
    @yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2558

    "I have a cat. Release it into the wild"
    Love how Kevin's first instinct when it comes to children and pets is just AbAnDoN

    • @mightbetoad6786
      @mightbetoad6786 2 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      he'd make a good dad

    • @liker-qd4fz
      @liker-qd4fz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      I mean considering what he usualy does to innocent and harmless beings it's probably better off.

    • @yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461
      @yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@mightbetoad6786 very true

    • @JoeHasAids
      @JoeHasAids 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461 on god

    • @rainingBrackets
      @rainingBrackets 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      "Adiós"

  • @manologamerss5801
    @manologamerss5801 2 ปีที่แล้ว +656

    15:30 You gotta respect his girlfriend's dedication to staying with him until that moment. He: Tried to go into relationship counseling immediately, and insulted her when she didn't want to go. Asked her for money when they were engaged and then cancelled the engagement when she said no. Insulted his supervisor, tried to sue them, and got fired for it. Tried to hook up with a friend he hadn't talked to for years. Put up one of their children for adoption when she didn't want to make love to him. Did many, many burglaries over the years. Accused her of having another man's baby when it was clearly his. Joined the Mafia, instantly got caught and became an informant. Not sure what this woman saw in Noah Electric that made her endure this behavior for several decades, but you gotta admire it.

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 ปีที่แล้ว +143

      I mean, her son didn't get the same level of patience, tried to give her elephant laxative once, and she whipped him to death on the spot.

    • @chuckn4851
      @chuckn4851 2 ปีที่แล้ว +69

      I think it's more fear and gaslighting than dedication, but still major props to her I guess

    • @Interstellar.1
      @Interstellar.1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +64

      The spark they had was just *ELECTRIC*

    • @aeisharodriguez1567
      @aeisharodriguez1567 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      😄😩😩😭😭😭 no, for real!!

    • @aureliaavalon
      @aureliaavalon 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @@Interstellar.1 Ironic since she refused to sleep with him several times.

  • @Aymelia-colon3
    @Aymelia-colon3 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3876

    Like the great poet "Weird Al" Yankovic once said: "We been spending most our lives, living in an Amish paradise"

    • @CallMeKevin
      @CallMeKevin  2 ปีที่แล้ว +1459

      thank you for the wise words Ps2 Nedward Flanders

    • @blumpet6250
      @blumpet6250 2 ปีที่แล้ว +166

      @@CallMeKevin big words for a man named KEVIN

    • @totallynothatguy1698
      @totallynothatguy1698 2 ปีที่แล้ว +148

      “We churn butter once or twice, living in an Amish paradise”

    • @kraanz
      @kraanz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      @@CallMeKevin "Raise a barn on Monday... soon I'll rise ANOTHER!"

    • @compoundcrown7689
      @compoundcrown7689 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      My favorite song

  • @mk_the_maniac2091
    @mk_the_maniac2091 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1404

    “Id probably be evil without the internet too” Ah yes, a world where Kevin still works retail

    • @lexorwhatever4940
      @lexorwhatever4940 2 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      I became evil because I worked retail. It's understandable.

    • @mjkrh
      @mjkrh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Evil Kevin ......
      Kevin

    • @kaitlynkim8054
      @kaitlynkim8054 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      aww ajo pop pp

    • @Ethan.YT.
      @Ethan.YT. 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Screaming

  • @fuzzyotterpaws4395
    @fuzzyotterpaws4395 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1012

    Kevin should play a game called Clock Tower (1996) because it seems perfect. Outdated graphics, bad voice acting, choices that can get you killed, and a murderer with a giant pair of scissors.

    • @sanuelkessler8435
      @sanuelkessler8435 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      the Jontron episode makes me think that Kevin will love it.

    • @1umbreon4life
      @1umbreon4life 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      This sounds perfect for him :o

    • @Catlady29
      @Catlady29 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I love that game, but it's a bit too scary for him probably

    • @t.castro4493
      @t.castro4493 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I've been meaning to play the Clock Tower games for over 10 years now 😔
      But seeing as I'm a noob, I'd probably lose frequently.

    • @lungse.2565
      @lungse.2565 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Clock towel

  • @CJDJKobe
    @CJDJKobe 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1114

    "Are the Amish good at running?"
    True story, one time I was at a 5k in central Pennsylvania, and who won the race? An Amish man. Literally running in full denim. Never have I been more aroused in my life

    • @Isosyth
      @Isosyth 2 ปีที่แล้ว +99

      Fuck can they run...

    • @flockfighter
      @flockfighter 2 ปีที่แล้ว +332

      It would have been so easy for you to not write that last sentence.

    • @SegmentedOdin
      @SegmentedOdin 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      wait what

    • @justtrash4769
      @justtrash4769 2 ปีที่แล้ว +141

      @@flockfighter The last sentence is what makes this comment good

    • @cbpercy06
      @cbpercy06 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      ​@@Isosyth like... The Wind?

  • @tpc_red9884
    @tpc_red9884 2 ปีที่แล้ว +444

    "both my siblings are getting promotions and I'm just here jobless and angry" That hit waay too close to home for my liking

    • @MoonageCatdreams
      @MoonageCatdreams 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Hang in there I have a job and I'm still angry. Keep trying. Hope it works out

    • @still_your_zelda
      @still_your_zelda 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@MoonageCatdreams yep, it just doesn’t stop whether you’re employed or not

    • @MoonageCatdreams
      @MoonageCatdreams 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@still_your_zelda it's fine I just need a different job lol

  • @blancaamaya955
    @blancaamaya955 2 ปีที่แล้ว +328

    “i’m going after the one group that can’t go after me”
    I’m dying kevin stoppp😂😂

    • @benwilson5031
      @benwilson5031 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Nice to meet you Dying Kevin Stoppp, I'm dad.

  • @Haliceph
    @Haliceph 2 ปีที่แล้ว +512

    Only Kevin could make "I'll donate you to science too" into a threat. Also I'm loving that Sims 1 background music

    • @momofasho5416
      @momofasho5416 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes the background music!!!

    • @Redtruck162
      @Redtruck162 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Glad you noticed also 😆

  • @SnowyBoss302
    @SnowyBoss302 2 ปีที่แล้ว +189

    As someone who lives in the heart of Amish country, watching you try to guess what they’re like was hilarious. And they do have pets. Kevin just likes to abandon things too much 😂

    • @tuesday9670
      @tuesday9670 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      if you live in amish country why are you on the web

    • @user-wh5fj6pj6m
      @user-wh5fj6pj6m ปีที่แล้ว +21

      @@tuesday9670they aren’t amish

    • @kimmerrill3165
      @kimmerrill3165 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +21

      You can leave near the Amish or "in amish country" without being Amish lol

  • @JOSHfReDeRiCkS1911
    @JOSHfReDeRiCkS1911 2 ปีที่แล้ว +821

    It’s impressive that they had a child by talking in bed fully clothed 😂

    • @AnderEvermore
      @AnderEvermore 2 ปีที่แล้ว +99

      The miracle of God it was.

    • @happytofu5
      @happytofu5 2 ปีที่แล้ว +80

      I mean technically you can have sex under these conditions. No need to get undressed or stop talking 😂

    • @Ratman.Not.Batman
      @Ratman.Not.Batman 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      its a miracle

    • @YouKnowImOnMyPeriodYah
      @YouKnowImOnMyPeriodYah 2 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Virgin Mary part 2

    • @lannyoneill3489
      @lannyoneill3489 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      ​@@happytofu5The amish wear a lot of clothing though, so I don't think it would be possible

  • @Robocopnik
    @Robocopnik 2 ปีที่แล้ว +204

    Paddleboats are OP, it seems like every time Kevin hops in one of those bad boys his mood skyrockets.

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      It's probably unintended,but they haven't fixed it on the premise that it's really funny that two rides in a boat or plane, no matter if it's a Boeing 747 or a Log Raft, will instantly give you 100% happy and cure Depression and Anxiety.

    • @1umbreon4life
      @1umbreon4life 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      How do you know it doesn't work irl? When was the last time you took out a paddle boat?

    • @jacobeii
      @jacobeii 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      A cheap, used, canoe that's like 120 bucks gives you 50 happiness per ride, you can do it as long as the boat isn't broken its insane

  • @zeitxgeist
    @zeitxgeist 2 ปีที่แล้ว +79

    "You are told that your depression is preventing you from being reliable" god damn i felt that one.

  • @eggchomp
    @eggchomp 2 ปีที่แล้ว +794

    “I’d probably be evil without the internet too.”
    … Even more so? I wonder how catastrophically evil Kevin would be without the internet.

    • @phormex1
      @phormex1 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      If the internet didn’t exist Jim Pickens would create himself

    • @andruloni
      @andruloni 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Without internet, he would have to show us all the evil deeds in person

    • @mossrosemcc
      @mossrosemcc 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Oh lord he'd have to move the crime to the streets of spain

    • @internetlurker1850
      @internetlurker1850 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @Joshua EdwinRoehl I FUCKING HOPE IT ISN'T

    • @scarletwolf_tb6307
      @scarletwolf_tb6307 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Without the internet, he'd have no outlet 😂 a truly horrifying realization

  • @VanWolf
    @VanWolf 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1701

    "I am an unexpected pregnancy, I am a Cancer, I am dumb as a rock."
    Stop calling me out Kevin 😭

    • @jg9301
      @jg9301 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      SAME

    • @loganmorgan409
      @loganmorgan409 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well you're attracted to animals so you can add disappointment to your list

    • @thomas-wr1fj
      @thomas-wr1fj 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@loganmorgan409 dont project logan

    • @loganmorgan409
      @loganmorgan409 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@thomas-wr1fj 1.My names not Logan little bud. 2. You can literally see it in his pfp, the desperate projection rheoric doesn't really work when my statement is an objective Truth.

    • @VanWolf
      @VanWolf 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@loganmorgan409 rhetoric*

  • @oompa1274
    @oompa1274 2 ปีที่แล้ว +164

    The fact Kevin didn't even think of working out or going to the salon/spa as a natural way of looking better

  • @SpydrXIII
    @SpydrXIII 2 ปีที่แล้ว +442

    this game needs an amish mod that highlights all the options an amish can take, but doesn't stop you from choosing other options.

  • @ulisessalduna4351
    @ulisessalduna4351 2 ปีที่แล้ว +248

    I love how as soon as he got a girfriend he forgot that the amish can't have sex until marriage. but well he's a relationship genius after all so he probably has his reasons

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      No, he didn't forget, he deliberately removed one of the easiest to follow in BitLife key factors of being Amish. What a Past Kevin.

    • @Lucaz99
      @Lucaz99 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Let’s also realize that being Amish is a religion and that Kevin joined the local Christian church in his pursuit of his dream job of exorcist. From that point on, he would to have renounced Amish life lol

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@Lucaz99 Yeah, Kevin knew literally nothing about the Amish beyond that they don't use technology (and even then he didn't know what exactly that meant) hand instead of trying to study their culture to make a respectful video, despite the satire, he instead chose to go with what he thought he knew, and deliberately ignored the information he could easily find, and what he didn't know, he just assumed, like he thought Amish people were very Catholic. What a Genius.

    • @corrie9762
      @corrie9762 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@manologamerss5801 it’s a video don’t take it so hard 🫶🏻

    • @cameronschyuder9034
      @cameronschyuder9034 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@manologamerss5801 I mean, he said at the beginning all his videos were offensive to someone in some way, so he decided to go for a group that cannot be offended (cause they won't be able to see the content). I don't think he was too serious about that part though. Also, I believe he decided to not search up some things just to make the video more interesting, rather than strictly adhering to what being Amish is.
      He wasn't being dumb, he just got lazy/thought this was a better way of playing for the sake of entertainment

  • @justlazykid
    @justlazykid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +99

    Kevin's search history:
    Are Amish couples allowed to sleep together?
    (9 months later):
    Can Amish babies get curcimsized?

  • @nicololacson1709
    @nicololacson1709 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    I love how Kevin's only options for careers in almost all of his Bitlife playthroughs are Exorcist, pr0n Historian (or set janitor), cat behavior consultant, and horse sp3rm extractor. His siblings always take up being "seamen" and his parents suffer from hemorrhoids (and oversharing). Also, he doesn't forget to steal and murder someone and make bad casino choices, with buying an exotic pet and boat and abandoning adopted children.

  • @kroganbers3rker778
    @kroganbers3rker778 2 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    "Was the cat named after the kid or was the kid named after the cat?"
    Neither. They were both name after famous tennis player LeBron Jones

  • @chaseowen2998
    @chaseowen2998 2 ปีที่แล้ว +273

    "My supervisor literally assaulted me, and I'm the one getting fired because I'm sad".
    Somehow, in America, this tracks.

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      To be fair, he called her a bitch. And to be honest, she wanted him to work 10 hours a week of unpaid overtime.

    • @sidoniegabrielle269
      @sidoniegabrielle269 2 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      lmao when i was 16 i worked at a movie theater and my boss yelled at me until i had to go cry. she then fired me for “crying all the time” despite that being the only time i had ever cried at work. fun place

  • @i_is_patrisha2578
    @i_is_patrisha2578 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    I work at a retail store and one of the weirdest experiences was a middle age Amish couple purchasing a giant bottle of lube and a pack of condoms. Normally I wouldn’t care. But it’s just not something I pictured an Amish couple going to the store to JUST buy condoms and lube. Good for them for real, just threw me off guard.

    • @mx.menacing
      @mx.menacing 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Condoms are what throws me off the most. But yeah I agree, good for them!

  • @TheAtomicCatastrophe
    @TheAtomicCatastrophe 2 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    As soon as he let the cat go I had to rewind to see if the brother was named after the cat or not.
    He was, in fact, named after the cat.

  • @willismagilous790
    @willismagilous790 2 ปีที่แล้ว +760

    Kevin doesn’t think any Amish people can watch him. Wait till he hears about Rumspringa

    • @Milkynut36
      @Milkynut36 2 ปีที่แล้ว +86

      Or the fact that there are plenty of amish that have phones and could find this video.

    • @Terratetradon
      @Terratetradon 2 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      @@Milkynut36 thats menonite

    • @Milkynut36
      @Milkynut36 2 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      @@Terratetradon homie there’s amish all around where I live, they have phones

    • @UtopssAKAPJ
      @UtopssAKAPJ 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      never heard of it

    • @ONYXPROJ3CT666
      @ONYXPROJ3CT666 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      i have a friend who is Amish and she has a phone

  • @Vylexx
    @Vylexx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    I feel like Noah Lectricity woulda been a more fitting name

  • @buzzardly1127
    @buzzardly1127 2 ปีที่แล้ว +149

    The fact this family named their kid after their cat since the cat was in the family first 😭

    • @anothercreator7433
      @anothercreator7433 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      I was named after the cat, lol. My brother way named after our dad, so my parents seem to just be super uncreative with names

    • @Jesse_17
      @Jesse_17 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@anothercreator7433 My brother's name is literally my uncle's name 💀

    • @ChuckDanger
      @ChuckDanger ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ​@Jesse That's fairly common in my area. My brother is named after our Dad, and I am named after my mother's brother (Uncle). Just a different last name.. obviously.

  • @FearsomeHippo74
    @FearsomeHippo74 2 ปีที่แล้ว +101

    “Guess we’ll have to murder them then!“
    (Haven’t hit play yet, but pretty confident placing my bets as to how this goes)

    • @sillypplproductions2
      @sillypplproductions2 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      It's not a Kevin bitlife video without some murder lol

  • @AltEzio15
    @AltEzio15 2 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    "The famous Amish mafia" Kevin there's a whole reality TV show about an Amish mafia and it's hilarious, you've got to check it out

  • @Recluse336
    @Recluse336 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The head electrician at the factory my dad worked at when I was a kid was an Amish guy. And he had a generator in his barn at his house so he could do automotive repairs as a side job. It's impressive what things certain Amish sects allow and don't allow compared to other Amish sects.

  • @calebfloyd4295
    @calebfloyd4295 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    "Because I'm ugly ,stupid and depressed" literally described my entire life

  • @jazzpancake1167
    @jazzpancake1167 2 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    I laughed far too much at the, "That's a bummer." joke. I am mature.

  • @itz_grass5890
    @itz_grass5890 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    You know it’s a CallmeKevin video when you audibly go “oh god what now” after reading the title.
    Never change, Kevin, never change

  • @TwinkleTwinkleTruly
    @TwinkleTwinkleTruly 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    Kevin’s smile when he said “lawsuit” X’D

  • @bobdolesrevenge
    @bobdolesrevenge 2 ปีที่แล้ว +155

    The Amish are pacifists, so they would never murder their boss.
    They'd hire a hitman.

    • @1umbreon4life
      @1umbreon4life 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Gotta love those mail-order hitmen. Surprisingly good bang for your buck

  • @StarSeeker35
    @StarSeeker35 2 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    Random things about the Amish: They're pacifists. If a family has a phone, it's in the barn. They use technology for business things, not sure to what extent though. A lot of then don't use cars, they use horse and buggy. They live in the world but are not it in that they don't participate in politics at all.

  • @thegaminglord2190
    @thegaminglord2190 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    Kevin: ok no gambling cuz im Amish
    "proceed to steal and murder people and join a mafia gang"

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Ah, yes, the classic Amish way. Constantly trying for hook-ups, murder for petty reasons, join the Mafia, and of course assaulting people at random.

    • @francisthesadcat1406
      @francisthesadcat1406 ปีที่แล้ว

      The lesser evil

  • @AniGaAG
    @AniGaAG 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    "Yes, Noah, you can sleep over at your girlfriend's place. Just make sure you never stop chatting while she's desperately trying to fall asleep."
    Is this how I have to imagine that...? xD

  • @gandalf_thegrey
    @gandalf_thegrey 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    3:07 You can see how proud he is about that joke and its the greatest thing ever
    The intro was the best thing ever
    I go after the one group that cant go after me
    amazing

  • @rainingBrackets
    @rainingBrackets 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    BitLife is one of those games that is super boring whenever I play it myself but when Kevin plays it it's always a blast ^.^

  • @jacquesalope
    @jacquesalope 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    amish basics: no technology, lots of arts and crafts. carpentry would have been good. they're allowed to experiment a little with technology in their teen years!

  • @RandomWriter9114
    @RandomWriter9114 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    "They didn't give me the interview. Why? Because I'm really ugly, stupid and depressed?"
    Whelp...that's a comment I can relate to! 😂

  • @anastasialovesoranges
    @anastasialovesoranges 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    I truly believe Kevin still has idle breakout tab open somewhere

  • @jazzisms
    @jazzisms 2 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    the uncanniness of this is, that literally last weekend i was among the amish. they make really good ice cream

    • @Bean-hz8jo
      @Bean-hz8jo 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hey im just curious: Were you allowed to use your phone while you stayed among amish people?

    • @jazzisms
      @jazzisms 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@Bean-hz8jo oh yeah totally. we just weren’t allowed to take pictures of them or anything like that. but i took a phone call while i was inside one of their shops. and some shops even accept apple pay

    • @Anarchy_Angel94
      @Anarchy_Angel94 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Where I live there's an amish grocery store and they make most of everything they sell and let me tell you, the stuff they make tastes so much better than the stuff that comes from places like Walmart. The store also smells really good from all the bread and sweets they make.

  • @chilidog2469
    @chilidog2469 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Kevin: **Has his characters do something stupid and illegal**
    Also Kevin: “I just don’t understand why his life was so bad!”

  • @ReecesCrushedToPieces
    @ReecesCrushedToPieces 2 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    Kevin saying that he doesn't know a whole lot about the Amish, meanwhile I'm here from the other side of the world only hearing about Amish people...

    • @meanncat3050
      @meanncat3050 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Amish people are kinda stuck in like early lightbulb days...no other technology.

    • @Trans_SovietBee
      @Trans_SovietBee 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Its some American religious sect-group thing that lives strictly by the bible.. weird people really

    • @fangsfrthmmrs
      @fangsfrthmmrs 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@Trans_SovietBee they don't even really consider themselves american. and other americans outside of the religion are referred to as English. Because the Amish and Hutterites are usually descended from swiss and german colonists from the 1800s. Some still learn high german in their schools

    • @Trans_SovietBee
      @Trans_SovietBee 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@fangsfrthmmrs My bad. I should've clarified on the American continent. I knew a bit, although very blurry, about that they consider themselves their own kind but I didn't knew from where they came from and what their background actually is so thanks for the insight about them^^

    • @metasteelgaming4373
      @metasteelgaming4373 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      We have a lot of Amish laborers near where I live. My father and my father-in-law both had roofs done by Amish, and a friend of mine had his front porch built by them. It's weird, they can have/use smartphones (and watch Kevin's video making fun of them) but they don't have electricity in their homes, so they need to charge their phones on job sites. They're a real "letter of the law" and not "spirit of the law" type. The more you know.
      There's a joke about only listening to the second half of AC/DC songs buried somewhere.
      Edited for spelling because phone keybored

  • @darkwowplayer
    @darkwowplayer 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    "You refuse to make love to me alright, I'm gonna put our child up for adoption"
    I think Kevin has just discovered a new level of petty.

  • @SkyCaspian42
    @SkyCaspian42 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I come from your newer Ouya video to say that you mean a lot to me. As a person, and the content you make. The first videos I watched from you were your Telltale's Walking Dead serious, and they killed me. I've been hooked ever since. You've honestly helped me through so much and been the thing that I look forward to on a regular basis. I haven't been here since the beginning, but I'm glad you picked me up for the ride.
    Also this video is really good too

  • @Hannah-ij2qx
    @Hannah-ij2qx 2 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    Finally a bitlife where he can't lose at the casino

  • @marinemachine3446
    @marinemachine3446 2 ปีที่แล้ว +39

    10 seconds in and Kevin has already made an enemy to his cult.

  • @catienoble3191
    @catienoble3191 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    As someone from Pennsylvania, I find his complete lack of knowledge about the Amish hilarious.

  • @honeybeeing.
    @honeybeeing. 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    i actually live next to the amish and goodness is it chaotic. they’re not great people (my neighbors, not speaking for all amish in general). they’ve killed our animals sadly, they drive past our house in their buggy at night very slowly with their stereo blasting super loud. they run a lumber mill there. right next door. all year long. for the past several years. it is very chaotic

    • @eva-rosec.6025
      @eva-rosec.6025 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      They killed your animals??!

    • @evakokkala7046
      @evakokkala7046 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Dude wtf is wrong with them?

  • @Wolfesbrain
    @Wolfesbrain 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Me, half-listening at work
    Kevin: "Travis, I'm gonna kill you!"
    Me: "wait, wtf did *I* do!?"

  • @becomingsophiesceliaclife
    @becomingsophiesceliaclife 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    The kid being named after the cat reminded me of when my son's dad wanted to name him after his cat 🤣 I told him absolutely not, we aren't doing that.

  • @aryan2009
    @aryan2009 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Aways remember, There's no time for sin and vice
    Living in an Amish paradise.

  • @nimmplays
    @nimmplays 2 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    One day Kevin will find a game that he lives in a normal life in...
    ...Probably not actually.

  • @Carver3483
    @Carver3483 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    “Don’t do the crime if you ain’t got time, but I have I time so we’re go gonna do crime.” ~ Mohammad Gandhi

  • @livispuzzled
    @livispuzzled 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    As someone who lives in lancaster PA where there are a shit ton of amish people, i can confirm that this is accurate

  • @brodylindquist9754
    @brodylindquist9754 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Kevin: I need children to work for me
    Also Kevin: puts his child up for adoption as soon as they reach working age

  • @chiefbrownfart
    @chiefbrownfart 2 ปีที่แล้ว +90

    There's levels to the Amish life. Some have carriages, some have cars. Some of the more traditional Amish talk smack about others carriages because the door isn't "traditional" enough. 🤣 It really is a full spectrum.

  • @queeneve7992
    @queeneve7992 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Fun Fact: Most Amish people are allowed to use technology, they just don't have technology inside of their communities. My cousin taught a class in rural indiana with a few very conservative amish students in it, he said they could work the ipad faster than anyone.

  • @Seiferboi
    @Seiferboi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Multiple generations of my grandparents came from the Amish. Here's a few tidbits people might be interested in, if they didn't know them already. The Amish can use phones, as long as it's hooked up away from the house. That way they can call a taxi if they need to. They could use electricity during their Rumspringa days, because at that time they don't have to follow the Amish rules. They could also become Mennonite because they're allowed to use electricity. Some Amish communities allow electricity as long as it's for something productive, such as machines for farm work. Only the men can vote on things like that, though. Never heard about the whole sleeping in the same bed before marriage, though.

    • @mx.menacing
      @mx.menacing 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Very interesting, and slightly concerning. I hope modern Amish sects are a bit less misogynistic.

  • @gigi.l
    @gigi.l 2 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Kevin, how did you know that right in this moment I needed one of your bitlife videos...thanks for making my shitty day better ❤️

  • @marveludus
    @marveludus 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    "my depression is preventing me from being dependable"
    being called out in a Call Me Kevin video once again

  • @MrAluminum
    @MrAluminum 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Kevins BitLife Characters and a Paddle Boat go together like peanut butter and jelly. It never fails

  • @slewy6351
    @slewy6351 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Amish people have a period between the age of 16-19 called Rumspringa where they can go into the outside world and experience it in all of its decadent glory before they get baptised and swear against our vices. They have the option to leave if they prefer the outside world but most do not. I’m not Amish, I’m not even American; it’s just something I read about a while ago so details might not be completely accurate.

  • @gabbyedmund6669
    @gabbyedmund6669 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I’ve been having such a rough day and this video was the first time I laughed/smiled all day, Kevin is the best ❤️

  • @tarekmoneimsaid
    @tarekmoneimsaid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    My favourite part of every Kevin's BitLife playthrough is when he switches over to another family member and they're always more successful than him (that is, until he ruins their lives).

  • @Scorpion-Gamer82
    @Scorpion-Gamer82 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Hi Kevin. I absolutely love your BitLife videos, I think I've seen them all, so I was happy to see a new one uploaded, I can't wait for the next one.

  • @AdamGlory
    @AdamGlory 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I learned so much about the Amish today. I mean, they can’t exactly come here to refute anything, so it may as well all be true.

  • @palladiumporcupine2651
    @palladiumporcupine2651 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I’m going to take a wild stab in the dark and say that Kevin knows nothing about the Amish

    • @manologamerss5801
      @manologamerss5801 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Wild? It would've been wild to assume Kevin knew _something_ about the Amish. Like, literally the pun he named his character after was everything he knew about the Amish.

  • @whydidwedothis6905
    @whydidwedothis6905 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    “He’s just stealing technology so no one else is aloud to use it.”
    That’s killed me 😂

  • @gena2231
    @gena2231 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    Me: *receives notification : Callmekevin "I tried Bitlife but I am Amish"
    Also me: *crossing myself* jay-sus pray for the souls of the departed

  • @lukaslafortune2009
    @lukaslafortune2009 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    It’s always so nice to see him post BitLife
    I started to play it after I saw him
    I tried like him but the always end up bad
    Even when I tried to be good I get falsely accused

  • @talcatt
    @talcatt 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    “take a MasterClass in writing?”
    “i’d rather MasterBate” CRYING 😭😭

  • @AllineedisKIMI
    @AllineedisKIMI 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Doesn't matter what chracter, the recurrent plan Kevin in Bitlife is always crime.

  • @Mooncubus
    @Mooncubus 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    We used to go to the lake near my Grandma's cabin in Kentucky and one time we saw and Amish family there. They legit swam fully clothed, so you were right about the pool.

  • @alexg9848
    @alexg9848 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I live in Lancaster, where we have one of the largest Amish populations. This is entirely accurate. 100% spot on

  • @chimpinaneckbrace
    @chimpinaneckbrace 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Kevin’s understanding of retirement is on par with Michael Scott’s understanding of bankruptcy.

  • @strikerblitz2164
    @strikerblitz2164 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    "To be fair I'd probably be evil without the internet too", if he's not evil, what is he now?

  • @dummnerd
    @dummnerd 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I live in the middle of Amish land, and Kevin looks exactly like every Amish in his thumbnail

  • @Red_neck01
    @Red_neck01 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Kevin's hardest challenge to get through a whole life with hearing "owww"

  • @sarah-my1xp
    @sarah-my1xp 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My favourite part was where Kevin was trying not to laugh at his own joke during the intro

  • @PaleGhost69
    @PaleGhost69 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    "My existence is a joke"
    Relatable.

  • @H1ghV0Lt4g3997
    @H1ghV0Lt4g3997 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I like the implication that murder and theft are okay but the Amish draw the line at gambling

  • @the_slime_cat
    @the_slime_cat 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    This Happened in bitlife for me:
    Russia’s Callme Kevin becomes a local hero after saving 10 people from a sinking bus. He was awarded for his actions.

  • @insertjoke1613
    @insertjoke1613 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love it how Kevin started working for another Church when he is was amish

  • @kaigaron9566
    @kaigaron9566 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I missed bitlife. They're my favorite.

  • @Spero_Hawk
    @Spero_Hawk 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    There are a lot of different types of Amish people. Some can use electricity if it's not in the house, like in a shed or barn, some can use cell phones, some can drive, some can use zippers and some can't, some can wear multiple colors on clothing and some only use one. In summation, the Amish are weird and one of life's great mysteries.

  • @Taglas.
    @Taglas. 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Kevin: insult my supervisor, get the last laugh!
    Also Kevin 30 seconds earlier: *kills supervisor*

  • @micahphilson
    @micahphilson 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    _robs multiple houses_
    _won't gamble, because that's frowned upon_

  • @AWildJirachi
    @AWildJirachi ปีที่แล้ว +3

    The cat was 14 so they definitely named their kid after the family pet; beautiful

  • @JPH6912
    @JPH6912 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Did anyone else get the Liberty Mutual ad before the video started of an ostrich wedding with the officiant yelling “No Kevin, not today!” At the ostrich in the crowd trying to object? Somehow it felt relevant.

  • @dennysoto1236
    @dennysoto1236 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I see what you did there at 7:10
    "Amish-tretching it" 😂

  • @rookwind
    @rookwind 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    id just been binging a bunch of the bitlife videos ive missed over the last two years so the timing on this one is great

  • @nicoprim8841
    @nicoprim8841 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    As someone who once had a flip phone, I'm something of an Amish myself

  • @persiepony
    @persiepony 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love how Kevin loves Bitlife so much and it's so entertaining to watch 😂