உங்களுக்கு என்னதான் பிரச்சனை Sainthavi's Perspective on Living Abroad
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ต.ค. 2024
- உங்களுக்கு என்னதான் பிரச்சனை Sainthavi's Perspective on Living Abroad
Living abroad presents a myriad of unique experiences and challenges. In this video, I delve into my perspective on navigating life in a foreign country. The complexities of traveling to India when you have children in school. We explore the reasons behind the necessity for parents to make the journey, shedding light on the challenges they encounter along the way. Despite the hurdles faced, we offer encouragement and advice to parents, urging them not to lose heart. #LivingAbroad #Perspective #CulturalExperience #Growth #SainthaviVlog #GlobalCitizen #CrossCultural #LifeAbroad #Travel #Explore #ExpandHorizons
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உங்களுக்கு என்னதான் பிரச்சனை Sainthavi's Perspective on Living Abroad!!
Well Said👏👏👏
Another point is that sometimes parents want us to change our kitchen, food and lifestyle when they are around. That can become a huge challenge, especially for working women/working mothers. In addition to that, some seniors make you feel as though you don't care for your kids much affecting one's self-esteem.
So true!
thanks for sharing practical experiance of indians staying abroad especially middle class. i am a parent of two daughters settled in america. i am aged 76 years and my wife 71 years . we got recently citizenship and decided not to travel frequently and quitely stay in india. my daughters also experiancing the same problems and we clearly understand .
Thank you sir for understanding my point ❤️
As someone who has lived in the US for 28 years we have experienced every single thing you both said with our in laws. Also when kids start college,we have to pay back student loans as well (at least the portion that we owe as parents) if our kids did not get full scholarships to colleges. In state schools themselves are expensive, but we’re seeing kids who insist on going to out of state or private schools or transfer after a year or two & only God can help those poor parents 🙏🏼
Agreed
Not all Indians live the way you have described in US.
The Gujarathi and Punjabi people bring their parents and their kids are well adjusted in both culture.
Good for them
@@SainthavisKitchenAgreed. 😃
Somebody is following "கூடி வாழ்ந்தால் கோடி நன்மை" proverb instead of finding an excuse to cover up once insecurity about money by constantly complaining.
Thanks for sharing your perspective. We truly do need awareness on this topic. As first generation immigrants, we are the first wave of people to experience all these things. Unless we discuss openly about this no one will even have a clue. Agree, Middle East & Singapore are reasonable options too people can visit relatives often. ❤
🙏🏽 thanks
I like your open talk . Not sugar coating anything . Hope everyone understands the other side atleast by seeing this video
Thank you 😊
Very nice discussion. Its so true and also we spend so much and go and sometimes people don't care or even say thank you for something we get . They think they are entitled and they think these people have lots of money and this is all they can get . We have zero expectations as we are in the giving side and still end up not satisfying people back home.
Absolutely!!
Yet another beautiful video and beautiful message Sainthavi 👏👏👏 completely agree with how relatives think our life is here and the point about taking kids to get togethers ! Very true , when parents are in India the mental stress that we go through here thinking about them , only we know . And you have genuinely and beautifully conveyed this message . As always it is therapeutic to see you speak and the support that Vinod bro gives 💗💗
Thanks Priya 😀💕
This series, am able to easily fwd to my parents and inlaws. You reflect our thoughts and what all revolves in our mind. 😊😊
Glad it’s relatable
My dear young couple, I'm from Chennai a Tamizhan. Left India when I was 29yrs in 1975. Lived in Europe for 15yrs and in the USA for the past 34yrs. Now I'm almost 79yrs old (may be older than your parents). We have two daughters and three grandchildren 21, 20 and 16yrs. I'm listening to you both as if listening in person. I have many hobbies like cooking, making music videos (470 music videos altogether) and travelling to Chennai and other countries every year. I'll write you guys further. Take care God bless.
Thank you 😊
exactly correct,but I enjoy here bcos I love to spend time with my grandkids.it's a change and chance to see places abroad.apart from this if v want to be with our children and grand children v have to sacrifice,if our health permits
❤️
Love your videos and the content that you upload ,you have taken the best decision and you have wonderful children ,a parents success is not how much you have earned and kept in bank or the properties that we have ,their success is their children getting well settled and being a role model for the society kudos to you and to ur hubby really a true inspiration ❤❤
Thank you for the kind words ❤️
Hello San . You are brutally honest in this series and you exactly reflect us . None of the US based TH-camrs talk the real life or they say only the positive side. Even now some people may misunderstand that you are blaming parents but you are trying to explain the situation we are currently facing and the lack of understanding they have . As you said in my era all the parents forced their kids to join IT they don’t care about kid’s interests,as they know it’s highest paying job and when we are settled in job seeing their friends kid ma going to US /UK for on-site they again asked us to try and so on . Esply for second child I had pressure from both parents and in laws but no one came for helping us during delivery and I ended up having sever postpartum depression. You are right about everything and kudos to you for doing this topic. Your kids are so blessed to have best parents.
Thank you Sana, I am glad to see this motivated and support. 🤗 ❤️ not many people will understand what I’m trying to share.
Hi Sainthavi,
Your discussion was a reflection of most of us living abroad. You nailed it!
Rev
NZ
Thanks 😊 Rev
Great learning for me, mother of 2 boys in San Antonio now they are 5&7 years old on how to set our expectations low and not to force them. If you could provide more tips on children upbringing for Indian parents it will be extremely helpful because the way i and my brother grew up in Chennai is completely different and i am still in the same mindset when i grew up. 18 years aaa my 5 year old is not listening 18 years no way.
Good question will do 👌🏽
What you said is right Sainthavi can u talk about the politics inside the peoples I been in India after marriage for 2 years then we moved to Atlanta I have 2 boys nowadays the people who is moving from Indian makes more confusion between the older gang also I don’t know who to trust.Have u gone through this.can u share pls.
Definitely will do a video on that. Thanks for the suggestion and support
Really useful video thanks for sharing 🎉
Another nagging question from family is “Why have you not received your green card yet”. If we try to explain the situation then “why are you still there”??
Haha so true
I guess there are few like us..we come from a very rich background..but have always instilled high values and discipline in our 2 children. ..Daughter is in UK , holding a very high banking job, settled with family..son is in US , highly educated and is a leading researcher in bio medical ..till now we were traveling a lot even 3 trips per year and visiting them..now due to health issues, not able to go..missing them a lot..Wishing sometimes we should have kept them here..but that makes us selfish as they got admission in ivy league and r doing extremely well..guess there r 2 sides to a coin.
Thank you for sharing your story 😊
My in-laws were complaining about we only taking them to Walmart , Costco , Indian store , temple . Not anywhere else . I had a baby that time . They were saying to everyone they are here for baby sitting 😤.😂😂
We agree with you, we dont expect much, feel happy whatever we get.👍
We should understand there are few issues between both sides. Nobody can be blamed completely.
That’s what I’m trying to render
a agree it is more funds need to to visit india from us and back. b ut i want to know whether your sons talk over phone to there grand farthers and mothers who are in india atlest twice in amonth. so that they will b e really happy.
Sain you’re very transparent and explaining practical problems what we are facing very informative videos for relatives
Thank you 😊
Very good quality badam, chocolate and everything else is available in India। No one expects u to bring such things to India
Let me tell u, people carry more things from India than what they bring from USA
May be some iPhone or some electronic items some of them may ask u to buy
Even in India children can't take so many days holidays। Life is much much tougher in India too। Here we manage children, parents, marriage, festival etc and also have a profession। It is just the choice। Nothing great except good infrastructure and comfort
Thanks for sharing
Well said ! As if people expect Badaam and Chocos from here...Ohh God !! Come on ...pls change d sarcastic tone when u mentioned that...how wud people react when u just say that ?? U first stop judging on d points u spoke ...think and change d tone when u say something ....address d topics properly....
you forgot house help in India. It is a luxury to have maid abroad.
higher studies abroad is much better and less confusion than in India ,in my opinion. There is NEET which the local govt keeps opposing while central mandates.. also jobs opportunities are hard in India. only those reasons abraod is better.
Very nice topic. Thanks for speaking about it. I have experienced it personally
My pleasure
Its not 18, now kids stop hearing to us in 13 itself. But they are clear in taking their decisions too....
I agree
What an insight? Again detailed transparent open talk. Keep going Sain
Thanks a ton ❤️
Super
good information
Wow .. I could 100 percent relates to you . Good job in talking about current situation. Especially relative marriage part same situation happened in our case as well 😂😂
Thank you so much 🙂 I have been watching your channel. Very kind of you to send this motivation. We both went to the same College NEC, kovilpatti. One of your relatives lives here in Mountain House CA and is friend, Rajameena. Small world 😀
@@SainthavisKitchen wow yes small world . ❤
What ever you said is 100% right I agree, I am in UK feels the same..
💯
I also face same problem, which many people have asked about. However, it is difficult to explain it to them sister.
I understand!
Excellent explanation
Glad you liked it
Nanum en en hus um single child of our parents, I can relate to the pain when our parents are getting old in India
Exactly!
Sainthavi you are living in which decade?
.
தாத்தா பாட்டிகளுக்கு முக்கியமாக language problemவந்துவிடும்.எல்லோருக்கும் இங்கிலீஷில் சரளமாக பேச வராது, அது அவர்களுக்கு ஒரு complex ஆக மாறிவிடும். பெரும்பாலோர் அங்கு வர யோசிப்பதற்கு அது ஒரு முக்கிய காரணம்.
I understand
100% true. Ange parents vantha boringa irukunu solrathuku reason avanganala freeya engeyum thaniya veliya poga mudiyathathu than!!! ❤️❤️❤️👏👏
Correct
Unga pecha ketu manasula iruka baarame kuranju pochu ❤
Happy to hear
Please talk about the healthcare systems and hospital expenses and procedures in USA.
I’ve heard there’re very expensive despite taking health insurance.
How do people manage during medical emergencies?
Thanks for asking filmed a response. Stay tuned.
I loved the point in 21:30
Thank you 😊
Nice video and 100% agree with parent experiences here
Thank you 🙏🏽
புரிதல் இல்லையென்றால், வயதானவர்களுக்கு எல்லாமே கஷ்டம்தான்.எல்லாவற்றையும் positive thinking ல்ல யோசிச்சா grandparents க்கு நல்லது.
I agree
Hi saindavi
Discussed about our parents for baby sitting. Most of them don’t like to stay longer here. In this same situation in my family between my wife and myself. We have grown up kids like you. She wants to go to Chennai for winter. Bcoz of her health issues she wants to avoid this cold ( Seattle ). But I don’t feel that works or not
Thanks for sharing about teenagers. That’s also helpful to manage our kids. And this is an eye opener discussion.
Thank you Krish 😊
Also india trip pogum podhu ella relations kum phone panni varom nu sollanum nu vera solranga .sollala na Idhuku thaniya vachu seiraanga india la relatives ellarum . Ellathaium pack panni ,children oda flight a pidikiradhae oru hassle nu experience panna mattum thanae therium..lol
Haha 😂 very true
Hi sain… very true 👍👍 I am here 23 years I miss lots…..my kids same age for your kids my daughter 17 my son 14 we are in Ohio
Oh nice!
Thank you 🙏
Omg ❤ u always read my mind Sainthavi ! I am surprised ..
Glad you think so ❤️
My in laws should listen to this video, but I can't forward it, they will say I am thimuru pidichava
Haha 😂
4:0 is happened in ky life.Even my mother doesn't like to take care of my children.All your points are correct.old generations will not see this video unless they see this video they will not understand.
They will eventually understand
Yes true. But one point why should anyone else take care of our children. I had 2 kids at 33 and 39.so glad I was in the US. I am a physician worked full time for both kdis. No inlaws passed away. My parents were old by the time I had kids. Fe very proud and happy I have survived this life here raising 2 kids, working with the help of daycare ofcourse and also taking care of them by ourselves. I started driving immediately after I was discharged from the hospital on day 3 for my son and started cooking from day 7 for both kids. We never depended on our parents. I feel very proud and self reliant now. We can do it. All humans are resilient enough to take care of their offsprings. It is better that way.
Dear fam, Epo ellam kids rekkaiodathaan porakuthunga 🤣🤣🤣..
- well said perspective worth watching,
We're not here to be people-pleasers, are we? 🙄🙄It's all about finding a sweet spot where we take care of each other, like a super awesome balancing act! And finally, Vinod bro nailed luxury vs lifestyle, just to add to that point, to me finding my own time for my "me time" is a luxury, and that's rare, and I'm chasing it. Thanks for the video!
Thank you 😊
nice and inspirational !
Thank you 😊
I think most of the women are having the same problem...it's not india or US everything are same.....
Engaloda 20yrs of us life full ah sollettenga..
Amazing discussion pa❤
Every single NRI yoda mindvoice pa ithu
😢thank you!!easily people judge and talk about us life.
They talk as if all NRI have a money tree in their backyard😅!!
Haha thanks for the ❤️
We have “ dollar “tree 🌴 in our back yard
@@SainthavisKitchen hahaha..😂😍
Thanks for calling the parents out for their hypocrisy 😊
💯
Sister, in-laws will not come because they have in their heads the children and grandchildren should only come to India and it's the duty of the children to visit parents and not vice versa. Per them children need to be respectful and come and see them every year
True!
Hi akka, you spoke my mind out
😊
I agree 100 % Sister
Thang you sainthavi 🎉🎉🎉
Hello, We are new here, living in san jose, was planning to go after holidays. Will it be a problem taking 2 weeks vacation in middle school 😮 please help me with this question
Yes they have a limit of how many days you can take leave. Pls check with school district.
@@SainthavisKitchen thanks 🙏
Well said. Perfect analysis. 👍
Glad you think so!
Please dear give english subtitles to reach non tamils too
Will try thanks
18:02 True!
மத்த vloggers compare பண்ணும் போது views கம்மி யா இருக்கு உங்களுக்கு,views increase பன்றதுக்காக இப்படி பேசுற மாதிரி இருக்கு
Spot on🙂
🙌
Well Said!!! ❤
Very true dear 🥰
🤗
Vinodh sir voice is like one serial actor
Haha thanks
@@SainthavisKitchen seriously 90s serial I think Kolangal
th-cam.com/video/1f7kmWgH-Cc/w-d-xo.htmlsi=mt5rdX8eR05GAKWK
This viswanathan character
Well said
🙏🏽
Buying gifts are your wish, people get all the things you mentioned, are available here.
Yes
Yes ! That point was very sarcastic and annoying as if people long for that badaam and chocos ! Gubeer nu sirippu vanthuduchu ......come on .....
But people do expect us to get stuff. If we get you will say everything is available here, if we don't get they didn't get anything. We have seen everything and when you are far you really understand the value of relationships. Not to blame anyone that's the sad reality and we gave accepted it Except for parents we are the givers to others and we don't expect anything else .
Laxmee I’m glad I made you laugh gubeernu
LakshmiBalaji 100% correct
Your message ( in the first video on this series) seemed directed at affluent, sheltered, and dependent individuals planning to study abroad, who rely on household help for everything. However, this represents only a small percentage of those coming to the USA. I'm concerned about what you said in your video, mentioning scenarios where individuals may struggle when coming abroad: not knowing how to dress for snow, do their own laundry, cook, or handle basic tasks. Someone lacking these skills may struggle regardless of whether they have house help.
Regarding your remarks about being a stay-at-home mom, while I respect that choice, your judgmental comments about working women caring for their families were uncalled for. It's okay if you prefer being at home, but please refrain from judging working moms (your first video @6.47). Even if you're not working, you're seeking your identity through certain activities, just as others find it through work. Let's avoid a judgmental tone on this topic! I usually refrain from commenting, but your reply to genuine criticism of the previous video irked me to comment here
Your opinion is based on your understanding and perspective. I appreciate you taking the time to write this lengthy post. Every comment is helpful to understand the audience. Thanks 🙏🏽
Yes I definitely second this comment
It was tad rude
My most annoying thing about this culture is kids don’t know to speak Tamil…how is this possible ? Even though parents speaks Tamil at home …I’m from Singapore my kids will talk both language correctly!
They know to talk they choose not to talk so that they can fit in. Unfortunately that’s what US lifestyle does to this generation.
Agreed
🙏🏽
Dont worry nanga sr citizens home poituvum
.
Super positivity ❤
Sorry you adopted us culture for money elders not like that they want relation touch,temple , food etc yr mother also visiting often , mother is adjusting everything for drs not mother-in-law
.
Elders iku boaring. Yes travel is very difficult I am 70 years Neenga enjoy pannunga daily temple povam dr problem than in USA yes true
Thank you for agreeing, really appreciate your input
Super akka
By looking 360 degree around there is no fun in settling abroad.....especially in US or UK.ppl earn more....but they loose may things in life which is pretty much costlier than wht they earn there.hence EAST OR WEST OUR HOMELAND IS THE BEST.
True
I disagree.. As a physician I am definitely better off in the US than taking beating from my fellow men in India.
We can't change our parents.Bitter truth.
So ,I prepare myself mentally,I MUST NOT BE LIKE in my future.
It’s a good coping mechanism.
Super
Thanks
Why can't you save some money and come back to India at least after your kids education
There is 10 more years for that!
It is easy to say but by then we have invested a lot in this country. Almost 20 years of working, house etc. It is like you live in bangalore for 2 decades and live to chennai leaving everything what you have established in bangalore. Nobody will do it. This is a poor analogy but that's what I can think of.
Thank you for the time you are spending to write these comments. I truly appreciate it.
can you PS do the video in english i would luv to hear
Will do thanks
Truth
👍
How about people expecting money from us They think that money come from backyard
😂
Ayyo en manasula ullada Ellam solringa
Mind voice catch panniten
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
some points can be accepted but you put entire blame on parents that they only made their son and daughter to go usa ,stressing them to give birth to kids not at all. nowadays girls prefer usa mapillai rather than groom working in india. moreover most of the couple asks their indian parents to come here not to spend time but to take care of small kids . they come here both husband and wife go to job the mom has to cook food and sit idle in the house .only weekends both are available and they want to take rest Atleast in india their life will be busy .young ppl can adjust to any situation but its hard for old ppl to get adjusted.when the kids grow certain age they will not put tickets to the parents. moreover when compared to usa india has developed very well plz dont say ppl in india are longing for badaam ,kismis 😂😂its vry childish . Let parents enjoy their life .why should they always put all the burden on their heads.Dont blame them .
Ha ha ...Badaam , kismiss point 😂😂👌👌👌....not all that she said can b agreed and true😀😀🤣🤣
Ur points well said
I’m able to understand your point of view, you don’t have to agree. Thank you for taking the time to write lengthy comment. Appreciate it.
Well said!!
Absolutely correct....
En manasula iruka baramey koranjurchu😂 fact uh pesuringa
Haha thanks
When you want an abroad life, you want to face the challenges. Why you expect your parents to come and help you. If the parents come willingly, that is ok. Otherwise, don’t call them and trouble them. They have done their duty. It is time for them to live their life and relax
Ohhhhh
@@SainthavisKitchenwhatever you say I agree with the above comment. You do have a gift of gab what they call. Excellent orator. I love watching your videos
Thank you
So true 😂😂😂😂
Well said scentugal ipadgal choclate.
Innum sila pala itemgal
Neega periye paarupu matri pesuringe😂
Haha which paruppu? Pista or badham!
If you don’t run behind citizenship then why don’t you come to India for delivering babies. Even in India not everyone has help and had to leave infants in day care . Why are you stereotyping parents about watching serials etc., aren’t you judging them , so you have nothing to say about others judging you or so called bullying. For all NRI, you all assume India has paused from the day you left. Nobody expects all the items and much more that you mentioned to bring to India. We get all the items and even better quality in India nowadays . Please broaden your horizon and remove your blinds I think you are stuck 20 years behind. Bringing parents there works out cheaper compared to child care that’s the only selfish reason behind inviting them despite knowing the discomfort during travel of 20plus hours . What the hell are you blabbering, it’s one scenario where someone has asked for gift instead of uncle attending the wedding , you need to do a reality check on your friends , so don’t generalise all people back home and STOP JUDGING . Again forcing children to attend parties, functions which decade are you stuck in , nobody forces their children for doing anything, they have their own opinions and choices to make. Entire video should have been released 2 decades back.
Wow, so much hatred & anger towards me! Take it easy and chill. Stay happy and blessed.
Really surprised , world needs more ramya like u , pls grow up. I guess ur into lot of negativity, Be in peace ✌🏽 ☮️ and kind ❤ and appreciate.
I support Ramya too...sainthavi you are living in which decade Aunty?
Ramya ,That was an apt comment
@@SainthavisKitchenyou should be proud you are raking some very good discussion. I love this conversation although I have difference of opinion. We can respectfully agree to disagree.
it is not aadi car , it is called Audi car :)
Thank you Phonics guru!
You are calculating so much for iPad, iPhone, badam etc etc. how much your parents must have spent for your education and marriage? Because of their sacrifice, today you are sitting and making video like this.Have some respect and gratitude for your parents.
Hmmmm