I not only agree with you, April, but I'm also said to report that here in The US(and also parts of Europe and Australia)a line of thinking parallel to what you are describing has arisen among many men who call themselves Men's Rights Activist and/or Red Pill men. The sooner both feminism and The MRM die out, the saner our world shall be
Hi April, I actually really agree with a lot of the things you mentioned. And that is why I too struggle with the label. My major problem with feminism is the double standards. We see a lot of feminists using feminism as an excuse for certain unpardonable acts. But because they identify as feminists, they can’t/shouldn’t be criticized. I tend to see a lot of feminists blindly supporting other feminists just because they are feminists. That defeats the whole purpose to me. Again, if the fight is for equality, let the fight be for everyone not just a particular group of people. I really liked the word you used; humanism. Why can’t we just want equality/equity for all? Do we have to put one section of the society down just to uplift another? Don’t we then just want to become the oppressors instead of the oppressed? It also seems as if feminists are more attached to the label than what the movement is all about.
Oh LORDDDD oh LORDDDD!!! This is what I’ve been talking, explaining and ranting about. Oh LORDDD THANK YOUUU!!! Like reallyyyy THANK YOU FOR THIS VIDEO!❤️
Agreeing with 95% of this. I believe what you are terming as "modern feminism" which goes extreme as hating men and women not in favour of the "modern feminism ideology" is NOT feminism. So you don't have to even term it as "modern feminism". They are just selfish people hiding under the "feminist " tag. The traditional meaning of feminism holds and will forever hold. Basically, what you are calling modern feminism is not even feminism to begin with. (Just selfishness and irrational behaviour, if you ask me) From all that youve explained, still sounds to me like you're a feminist. Because feminism is basically equal rights for all genders. (The traditional meaning and only meaning ; not what you're calling modern) Regardless, still makes sense to call yourself a humanist and ofcourse, you're free to say you're not feminist. Great video though.
April I hear you, but it only seems to me that you may not have an in-depth appreciation of a lot of the things you mentioned but ofc I may be wrong about that and I’m willing to stand corrected. I’ll explain: 1. You got the stats wrong (Even pertaining to Ghana alone) that a lot of people agree with equality between men and women & I get why that could be because with the people we surround ourselves with and the small circles of people we meet in Ghana in our every day life, it’s easy to assume that everyone or at least most get the gag of what feminism is and agree with its “traditional” ideals and tenets. But April, this is not so and you would be very very surprised. Check the stats girl, just check. A lot lot lotttt of people are anti-feminists, trust. 2. You need to understand that at this time when the feminism movement is still at its peak and striving to be cemented in people’s minds, hearts and future lifestyles choices, influencers like yourself who come out to say “I am not feminist” can only hurt the movement. Now I’m not at all saying that you should at all cost identify as one because it is perfectly within your rights not to. And if for instance you weren’t for feminism ( equality of the sexes), that would be perfectly fine Bc you’re entitled to that much. My tiny worry is your reason for it. Now, like you rightly pointed out, there are different types of feminist ( not black and white like you mentioned because those are not types, those are just feminists who focus more contextually to the women problems that mainly affect their kind). Now if you find that a particular type of feminists ( while having the same basic tenets which is equality of the sexes) have in addition, other beliefs, why should that affect your identification as a feminist? Moreso when at this time, identifying as a feminist has power especially as an influencer. Even assuming that those types of feminists were committing crimes, like killing men and saying they’re feminists, first of all it doesn’t change the basic/traditional meaning of the movement for a person to say Bc of these groups of feminists, I’m no longer a feminist. Usually it wouldn’t matter, to me at least, but because feminism is still at its peak and as an influencer, identifying as a feminist has power, it just saddens me that you don’t identify as one. 3. Not that you should care, but I’m particularly uncomfortable listening to you try to “validate” how people who have been oppressed should react to their oppression and their oppressors. I call bs every time people label a section of feminists as “extreme” because in as much as I personally wouldn’t mind a man opening doors for me, I one hundred percent understand a woman who would and would rather not. There’s a whole history of pain, a whole history of oppression behind these things. People don’t get up and decide to be “hate” men, if you will. And for many it’s not just a history but present reality in a lot of things. People haven’t healed. People are still very much scarred. For that reason I’m uncomfortable telling people how to react to their oppression. All this being said, you mentioned that you agree with the basic tenets of feminism. I think we’ll just take that.
1. yes, like i said there are a lot of people, particularly men who are anti-feminist and who are in fact misogynists. And I indicated that those type of people need to be put in their place, not for any strictly feminist reasons but for basic equality reasons, the basis being human rights. 2. I explained why I dont identify as one. If a certain philosophy or ideology contains views I do not agree with (and because feminism has many different strands, like you said, not necessarily based on race, but the actual types of feminists such as radicals, liberals, eco feminists and so on, and it so happens that I cannot fully agree with any of them), then I cannot consider myself a feminist. I do not see why you have to label yourself a 'feminist' to stand up for human rights of all people, regardless of their sex or sexual identity. 3. I dont think there's anything wrong with a woman not wanting a man to open the door for her. It is the aggression against men in general, even when declining such offer for example, which is problematic. Yes there is a historical aspect, as you rightly mentioned, my issue is how its being handled today, not the fact that we want to correct certain past injustices. Turning men against us (good men included) would not change the situation, which in my opinion should be the ultimate goal. I am not telling people how to feel, I am explaining why I'm not okay with how certain women who classify themselves as feminists behave. They behave this way toward men and sometimes even women (which is something I have experienced myself from people who call themselves feminists). I do not think it is right, neither do I think it is smart. To me, a history of pain and oppression is not an excuse to terrorize men and even some women. We can correct injustices through policy reform, affirmative action, advocacy and the law... the right way. In my opinion, all this can be done without the tag 'feminist', a term which in today's reality has been warped to the extent that its meaning and what it stands for becomes controversial. And I'm not saying women do not have the right to be angry, neither am I telling women how to react. I am simply explaining why in my view, it is not okay, and rather worsens the situation, instead of bettering it which should be the actual goal. It is just my perspective on the situation, not necessarily a declaration of what is right or wrong.
It seems that these days - whatever your gender - when asked if you are a feminist, your answer can only be damning. Say no, and regardless of your own sex, you are branded a bigoted woman-hater. Probably even stupid and ignorant. You think women belong in the kitchen and men are the head of the household. Say yes as a woman, and you are a bra-burning man-hater whose campaigning to “free the nipple” or show your underarm hair blinds you from real-world issues. Say yes as a man, you’re instead branded as a “whipped soy boy” who is either labeling themselves as a feminist in a pathetic attempt to impress women, or to obey a domineering woman already in his life. So… are these the only two options in society’s eyes? What about the vast majority (I hope) of us who don’t subscribe to either of these extremes and believe that men and women - though often different in minor or superficial ways, are fundamentally the same Sure, there really are many bigots out there, as well as some misguided so-called “feminists” who mistake a movement of equality for an infantile rampage of naïve, tunnel-visioned, and self-centered privilege. But I propose that most of today’s alleged “gender war” is largely fuelled by semantics, definitions, and unfortunate misunderstandings
I can't call myself a modern day feminist because feminism isn't what it used to be. Of course I probably won't be here if it hadn't been for women who fought throughout history for my right to have a voice. In this age we have what we call the third wave feminism. The feminist movement is usually broken up into three “waves.” The first wave in the late 19th and early 20th centuries pushed for political equality; basic control of their lives,. abolish slavery, the right to retain property, right to vote. The second wave, in the 1960s and 70s, pushed for legal and professional equality; right to use birth control, anti-sex discrimination laws, roe v. Wade . And the third wave, in the past couple decades, has pushed for social equality. This is a tricky business because you’re no longer dealing with institutions-you’re dealing with people’s perceptions and people’s brains. You have to confront belief systems and irrational assumptions and force people to unlearn things that they’ve “known” for decades. It’s a really, really hard thing to face. These feminists fight for what they believe to be a gender wage gap. They still advocate for"reproductive rights". They're still decrying the "Injustice of sexual discrimination". And their still battling "white patriarchy". Today's feminism is a little too different because not only are the third waves very different from the former, they also differ from the pioneers They are no longer just fighting for women to have the same rights as men, they are fighting for the emasculation of men, the fluidity of gender, uninhibited abortion and the resistance. They parade around anatomical hearts, and iheart abortion t-shirts, they skip work to show their economic words. They tell other women they are an embarrassment to the female gender for simply holding different political views. Now in order to be a feminist you not only have to be pro choice an anti patriarchy, you also have to embrace the LGBT agenda fully support planned parenthood. Feminism has embraced a doctrine that attempts to fit women into an ideological mold which is ironic considering that's the very thing they say they're fighting against. A culture that pigeonholes women into thinking and acting in a way that seemed acceptable by society. I could make a long list of the additional inconsistencies of third wave feminism from their silence on the oppression of Islam and Sharia law to their embrace of celebrities whose lyrics words and actions do anything but elevate women eg.the recent WAP by Cardi B( I have alot to say about this song) Third wave feminism isn't progress, it's hypocrisy. I don't want to be a part of a movement that tells me I have to meet certain political prerequisites to be included. I want to care about women and humanity as a whole without an ideology that in many ways is diametrically opposed to my values. I want women to be empowered and have opportunities to be whoever they want to be. I can be outspoken career driven and ambitious and I can also be confident in those things without forsaking my principles and buying into the lie that feminism is the only means by which we can help ourselves and help other women. First and second wave feminism are still in violent need in other countries but no one is talking about that. There are so many hypocrisies of modern day feminism: *Feminists wanting job fields to be more diverse, especially when it comes to STEM fields. Thus, many schools have created special STEM programs - just for girls. This indirectly implies that women need special treatment to be included, to feel needed, to feel smart. And if girls make it out of those programs into others that aren’t specifically for women, they often end up in settings with overpowering, misogynistic men who will inevitably be waiting for them to mess up. This transition from exclusive, female environments can leave women not knowing how to handle workplace sexism. These all-girl STEM programs set girls up for failure. While some might say “Don’t train the women, fix the men,” I believe everyone needs to make an effort in this fight. By definition, feminism is the fight for equality. *Feminist blaming men continuously for gender inequality and few women in Stem fields but ignoring research that provesif you let women and men make their choices, what actually happens is they specialize in different situations and you don't get equality of outcome. For example Scandinavian countries have moved more towards gender equality than any other countries. And the personality differences in Scandinavia have increased rather than decreased. And the proportion of women who are choosing STEM fields has decreased rather than increased. So as cultures become more gender neutral the number of women who choose STEM fields decrease. So if you let women and men make their choices, what actually happens is they specialize in different situations and you don't get equality of outcome. As countries get more egalitarian, the differences get larger than smaller. The scientific data on that is very clear. It was a shock to everyone to find that out. It having the opposite effect that the gender equality types predicted. It isn't a theory, it's actually data driven by tens of thousands of surveys and the best scientific literature on the topic. *A feminist who believes it is a man’s obligation to pay for a date: hypocritical. *If a feminist believes violence against women is bad but thinks violence against men is ok (but who thinks this? Not alot of people but feminists reluctance to help fight for violence against men proves this): hypocritical. *Feminist initiatives like #HeForShe impose on men the very gender roles feminists claim it tries to eliminate. It just adds one detail: Only fill those roles for the benefit of women, never because it's natural or comfortable for you. And never expect to have your masculinity considered BY women while they're busy demanding you be strong & commanding against other men on women's behalf, because your humanity is secondary to your function as a shield/beast of burden for women. *Feminist propaganda campaigns like "Don't be that guy" do the same thing - make every man, specifically BECAUSE of standards for masculinity, responsible for the safety of women who can't or won't be responsible for themselves Meanwhile, feminists clearly feel entitled to tell men which feelings they're allowed to express Feeling girly? Great! You're a feminist! Feeling a need for human companionship? Get the heck outta here, creep! Feeling hurt over being rejected? Now you're a misogynist! Resent the damage done when you were circumcised? Don't expect help from feminists. They're too busy lining up to tell you that women, whose genital integrity is legally protected throughout the vast majority of the world in many nations where yours isn't & even where neonatal male genital cutting is common, have it worse. And they'll tell you that you're a misogynist if you think the more widespread cutting practice is anywhere near as bad of a problem as the comparitively rare one. Heart broken because your children were taken from you in a divorce? Don't look to feminists for help. They're too busy opposing equally shared parenting legislation. Would you feel more comfortable with equal reproductive rights, such as a legal equivalent to women's "safe haven" option? Don't look to feminists for help with that, either. They're too busy demanding stricter child support enforcement against you. Hurt or afraid because you're being abused by your wife, girlfriend or a woman in your family? Don't look to feminism for that, either. They've spent the last 40+ years telling the public that doesn't happen, and if it does, it's "preemptive self defense" because they believe you'll inevitibly hit back. Trauma from being assaulted or even raped by a sexually aggressive woman? Yeah, don't look to feminism for help with that either. Feminist research on sexual violence has been carefully designed to avoid evidence of experiences like yours so they can paint sexual violence as a male behavior & blame you for it. Has your life been wrecked by false accusations? Don't expect feminists to care how you feel about that, either. Their story on your experience varies from "it's not as bad as experiencing (whatever crime you were falsely accused of) or "It's ok to sacrifice a few innocent men to ensure we catch all men guilty of (whatever the crime) as if hurting you somehow helps real victims of that crime... to "it's no big deal, because it's rare" as if rarity makes a crime less heinous ... to "This is beneficial - the falsely accused could learn something from the experience" as if you had no sympathy for victims prior & any harm done is negated by changing that... to "Women don't lie about (the crime) so it can't be false" even if you have evidence of your innocence. So men are supposed to express your feelings, except when it's not convenient for feminists, such as when you've been raped, abused, alienated, or falsely accused BY A WOMAN... or permanently scarred in a way that they feel competes with a female victim narrative. Feminists want: The rights of men Privileges of women The responsibilities of neither But feminism is totally NOT about hating men, right?
@@doreenkuunapor6807 I can't call myself a modern day feminist because feminism isn't what it used to be. Of course I probably won't be here if it hadn't been for women who fought throughout history for my right to have a voice. In this age we have what we call the third wave feminism. The feminist movement is usually broken up into three “waves.” The first wave in the late 19th and early 20th centuries pushed for political equality; basic control of their lives,. abolish slavery, the right to retain property, right to vote. The second wave, in the 1960s and 70s, pushed for legal and professional equality; right to use birth control, anti-sex discrimination laws, roe v. Wade . And the third wave, in the past couple decades, has pushed for social equality. This is a tricky business because you’re no longer dealing with institutions-you’re dealing with people’s perceptions and people’s brains. You have to confront belief systems and irrational assumptions and force people to unlearn things that they’ve “known” for decades. It’s a really, really hard thing to face. These feminists fight for what they believe to be a gender wage gap. They still advocate for"reproductive rights". They're still decrying the "Injustice of sexual discrimination". And their still battling "white patriarchy". Today's feminism is a little too different because not only are the third waves very different from the former, they also differ from the pioneers They are no longer just fighting for women to have the same rights as men, they are fighting for the emasculation of men, the fluidity of gender, uninhibited abortion and the resistance. They parade around anatomical hearts, and iheart abortion t-shirts, they skip work to show their economic words. They tell other women they are an embarrassment to the female gender for simply holding different political views. Now in order to be a feminist you not only have to be pro choice an anti patriarchy, you also have to embrace the LGBT agenda fully support planned parenthood. Feminism has embraced a doctrine that attempts to fit women into an ideological mold which is ironic considering that's the very thing they say they're fighting against. A culture that pigeonholes women into thinking and acting in a way that seemed acceptable by society. I could make a long list of the additional inconsistencies of third wave feminism from their silence on the oppression of Islam and Sharia law to their embrace of celebrities whose lyrics words and actions do anything but elevate women eg.the recent WAP by Cardi B( I have alot to say about this song) Third wave feminism isn't progress, it's hypocrisy. I don't want to be a part of a movement that tells me I have to meet certain political prerequisites to be included. I want to care about women and humanity as a whole without an ideology that in many ways is diametrically opposed to my values. I want women to be empowered and have opportunities to be whoever they want to be. I can be outspoken career driven and ambitious and I can also be confident in those things without forsaking my principles and buying into the lie that feminism is the only means by which we can help ourselves and help other women. First and second wave feminism are still in violent need in other countries but no one is talking about that. There are so many hypocrisies of modern day feminism: *Feminists wanting job fields to be more diverse, especially when it comes to STEM fields. Thus, many schools have created special STEM programs - just for girls. This indirectly implies that women need special treatment to be included, to feel needed, to feel smart. And if girls make it out of those programs into others that aren’t specifically for women, they often end up in settings with overpowering, misogynistic men who will inevitably be waiting for them to mess up. This transition from exclusive, female environments can leave women not knowing how to handle workplace sexism. These all-girl STEM programs set girls up for failure. While some might say “Don’t train the women, fix the men,” I believe everyone needs to make an effort in this fight. By definition, feminism is the fight for equality. *Feminist blaming men continuously for gender inequality and few women in Stem fields but ignoring research that provesif you let women and men make their choices, what actually happens is they specialize in different situations and you don't get equality of outcome. For example Scandinavian countries have moved more towards gender equality than any other countries. And the personality differences in Scandinavia have increased rather than decreased. And the proportion of women who are choosing STEM fields has decreased rather than increased. So as cultures become more gender neutral the number of women who choose STEM fields decrease. So if you let women and men make their choices, what actually happens is they specialize in different situations and you don't get equality of outcome. As countries get more egalitarian, the differences get larger than smaller. The scientific data on that is very clear. It was a shock to everyone to find that out. It having the opposite effect that the gender equality types predicted. It isn't a theory, it's actually data driven by tens of thousands of surveys and the best scientific literature on the topic. *A feminist who believes it is a man’s obligation to pay for a date: hypocritical. *If a feminist believes violence against women is bad but thinks violence against men is ok (but who thinks this? Not alot of people but feminists reluctance to help fight for violence against men proves this): hypocritical. *Feminist initiatives like #HeForShe impose on men the very gender roles feminists claim it tries to eliminate. It just adds one detail: Only fill those roles for the benefit of women, never because it's natural or comfortable for you. And never expect to have your masculinity considered BY women while they're busy demanding you be strong & commanding against other men on women's behalf, because your humanity is secondary to your function as a shield/beast of burden for women. *Feminist propaganda campaigns like "Don't be that guy" do the same thing - make every man, specifically BECAUSE of standards for masculinity, responsible for the safety of women who can't or won't be responsible for themselves Meanwhile, feminists clearly feel entitled to tell men which feelings they're allowed to express Feeling girly? Great! You're a feminist! Feeling a need for human companionship? Get the heck outta here, creep! Feeling hurt over being rejected? Now you're a misogynist! Resent the damage done when you were circumcised? Don't expect help from feminists. They're too busy lining up to tell you that women, whose genital integrity is legally protected throughout the vast majority of the world in many nations where yours isn't & even where neonatal male genital cutting is common, have it worse. And they'll tell you that you're a misogynist if you think the more widespread cutting practice is anywhere near as bad of a problem as the comparitively rare one. Heart broken because your children were taken from you in a divorce? Don't look to feminists for help. They're too busy opposing equally shared parenting legislation. Would you feel more comfortable with equal reproductive rights, such as a legal equivalent to women's "safe haven" option? Don't look to feminists for help with that, either. They're too busy demanding stricter child support enforcement against you. Hurt or afraid because you're being abused by your wife, girlfriend or a woman in your family? Don't look to feminism for that, either. They've spent the last 40+ years telling the public that doesn't happen, and if it does, it's "preemptive self defense" because they believe you'll inevitibly hit back. Trauma from being assaulted or even raped by a sexually aggressive woman? Yeah, don't look to feminism for help with that either. Feminist research on sexual violence has been carefully designed to avoid evidence of experiences like yours so they can paint sexual violence as a male behavior & blame you for it. Has your life been wrecked by false accusations? Don't expect feminists to care how you feel about that, either. Their story on your experience varies from "it's not as bad as experiencing (whatever crime you were falsely accused of) or "It's ok to sacrifice a few innocent men to ensure we catch all men guilty of (whatever the crime) as if hurting you somehow helps real victims of that crime... to "it's no big deal, because it's rare" as if rarity makes a crime less heinous ... to "This is beneficial - the falsely accused could learn something from the experience" as if you had no sympathy for victims prior & any harm done is negated by changing that... to "Women don't lie about (the crime) so it can't be false" even if you have evidence of your innocence. So men are supposed to express your feelings, except when it's not convenient for feminists, such as when you've been raped, abused, alienated, or falsely accused BY A WOMAN... or permanently scarred in a way that they feel competes with a female victim narrative. Feminists want: The rights of men Privileges of women The responsibilities of neither But feminism is totally NOT about hating men, right?
I found myself in agreement with a good portion of the points you made here. Especially about the humanism part and why that's generally more important than feminism. I'll like you to clarify a of couple things you mentioned though if you don't mind: 1. Do you think the mismatch between the definition of feminism like you stated and the actions of some of the feminists is necessarily a good enough reason to unsubscribe from the feminism? To clarify my question a bit more, I'm assuming you generally agree in principle with the ideals of feminism because you mentioned that you do but the behaviour of some feminists is what you don't agree with. So I guess what I'm really trying to find out is that is it possible to still be a feminist and disagree with the behaviour of some feminists? 2. This is like a follow up question from the first. Do you think there is a possibility that you're overestimating the amount of "bad actors" in the modern feminist movement? and if there is a possibility, what do you think would be a good way to find that out? 3. lastly lol at 11:36 . Do you think it helps to encourage women to use tactics like that? Do you think anyone with a form of power should be open manipulating others with it?
I like your questions and I have a lot to say to answer them but unfortunately this medium is not very conducive for that. I will try to explain as much as I can though: 1.In a way, yes I do think there is a mismatch. But it depends on the type of feminism we are talking about. Some types of feminism, for example, radical and to an extent cultural feminism, want to completely restructure the basis of society towards matriarchy and overthrow the patriarchal structure which according to them is present today (im not saying it isnt). In this case, I do not really see a mismatch because the "modern feminists", as I call them, in a way complement and are motivated by radical feminism agenda. I do think that if you strictly classify yourself as a liberal feminist or an individualist feminist, it might seem as though you are contradicting yourself by acting like some "modern feminists". On the other hand, if we are talking strictly about the general definition of feminism, I do not think there must necessarily be a mismatch. It depends on what exactly a particular "modern feminist" stands for. Some claim superiority, others simply ostracize men without necessarily claiming or wanting to be superior to them. But generally, yes I do think a person can classify themselves as a feminist and disagree with the behaviour of other feminists. 2. I do not think I am necessarily overestimating the bad actors. It is quite difficult to measure something like that. And my point is not necessarily related to the number of bad actors out there but the fact that they exist in the first place and have largely taken over the field in the media. MY perspective: My problem with feminism is that it is filled with so many theories and diverging opinions which makes it difficult for us in the contemporary world to even know what actually feminism is. I, for example, cannot classify all the people who claim to be feminists as feminists under the general definition, when sometimes their goal and methods for reaching those goals blatantly contrast. The method of reaching a goal is also important to me, especially if I believe the method to be more detrimental than helpful in attaining a particular goal. Of all the types of feminism I have read about, I cannot fully agree with all the goals and methods of even one of them. So i prefer not to call myself a feminist, to avoid confusion on the whole matter. Do I believe men and women should be equal in terms of fundamental structures in society and before the law? Absolutely yes. We are all human beings and are entitled to be treated equally or equitably depending on the situation. 3. I see what you mean here. I wasnt being totally serious about that; should have rephrased it.
@@AprilN Thanks for the response. I think you explained yourself good enough here. If I understand you correctly, the contrast amongst the various ideologies in the movement is a big part of why you're uncomfortable identifying as a Feminist. Also that the most popular and loudest voices tend to be that of the "bad actors" which is not a representation you are necessarily comfortable with. From what I gathered I think you explained well enough what's generally discouraging you from identifying as a feminist. Also thanks for clarifying the last question. I had a slight suspicion it was a joke but had to ask to be sure.
Western Feminism begins as protecting the rights of Women but end in Tribalist Gender Wars, Feminism is no friend to African Culture, just ask the hoards of Diaspora American ADOS fleeing the failed Black American Community. African Women, don't make a similar mistake of "Throwing the Baby out with the bath water", and "Be Weary of Greeks bearing Gifts". American BMGTOW
I think that yeah what you say is true to some extent but a lot of people have misconstrued the true feminism. There are a lot of women who are angry and bitter about certain injustices that they have experienced and they blame men entirely for these things but sometimes these problems that women face are even caused by their fellow women and so instead of addressing these issues independently, they turn around and say they’re feminists. Feminism shouldn’t be that we kill all men in the world and let only women exist, and that’s how women will be safe because men are bad. Men and women coexist to help each other fulfill their purposes on earth, women need men as much as men do. We all need to learn to understand what are individuals roles are and perform them. Women can fight for equality and fight for their voices to be heard but not to the detriment of other human beings. For me we are all human beings and have the right to exist here on earth and no man or woman has the right to use their power to make another person uncomfortable for existing. Modern feminism is filled with some angry bitter women who who fail to understand their worth and so go round making a lot of noise especially in Ghana, small heartbreak noorr the girl says she’s now a feminist. It’s not the best, it’s just turning girls into arrogant people who will miss a lot of opportunities because they do not respect men. If you know your worth as a woman no man can take advantage of you or infringe on your rights.
You will be suprised how the 'feminists' will come for you in the comment section. But I surely love and appreciate how deep you are in expressing your thoughts.
And generalizing it like that. I mean " feminism in Africa" undermines some important things that feminism & human rights movement have done in Africa like fighting against FGM & early forced marriages because people on the internet have made the term annoying lol
Oh I certainly acknowledge everything that has been done to uplift and empower women in Africa, including the examples you're giving. Not sure what you mean by "generalising it like that" 🤔 Yes my problem is with the label "feminist" and what it actually seems to mean today..
I like all your points in this video. In my opinion, I think your preception of the societal roles of men and women in society is accurate (i.e., not pesemistic nor optimistic). I think youre very fortunate to have a mind that lends its self to view society from a practical/realistic standpoint. But I also believe that most people do not think the way that you think. Being said, even though they are not true, I think catchphrases like "women can do anything that a man can do" are still worth saying because they motivate women to participate in male dominated activities. However in the same breath, I do agree that such catchphrases are false and a more accurate catchphrase would be "men and women and different strengths" or even more accurate, "in general, people have different strengths". Hmm.
Interesting video, April. But your reason for not being a “feminist” doesn’t sit right with me. And from your explanations, it seems that you actually are a feminist. What you term as modern feminism is simply a branch on the big tree called feminism. It is a hasty generalization to judge a tree as rotten when only one branch is rotten. It’s alright to disagree with women who claim men aren’t necessary to their existence but to simply invalidate feminism as a whole for that reason is a logical fallacy. I like the fact that you do recognize the role that patriarchy and patriarchal stereotypes play in society, using yourself as an example. Because recognizing this and knowing how much you as a woman are actually capable of (and rising to the occasion each time) actually does make you (surprise surprise) a feminist. I don’t doubt that fact that you’ve read and researched before making this video but it would be great to actually do more research (both desktop and actual interaction with all types of feminists) so you have a better understanding of feminism and how important you are to the movement. I admire your consistency as a YT blogger, keep at it! 😘
Thanks for your comment! My problem with feminism is that it is filled with so many theories and diverging opinions which makes it difficult for us in the contemporary world to even know what actually feminism is. I for example cannot classify all the people who claim to be feminists as feminists under the general definition of feminism, when sometimes their goals and methods for reaching those goals blatantly contrast. The method of reaching a goal is also important to me, especially if I believe the method to be more detrimental than helpful in attaining a particular goal. How do you classify such different agendas and methods under one umbrella? Of the types of feminism I have read about, I cannot fully agree with all the tenets and methods of even one of them. So I prefer not to call myself a feminist, to avoid confusion on the whole matter. Do I believe men and women should be equal in terms of fundamental structures in society and before the law? Absolutely yes. We are all human beings and are entitled to be treated equally or equitably, depending on the situation. Moreover, the term 'feminism', is gender binary and non-inclusive, instead of being gender neutral. If equality is what we want, why don't we use that term? The word 'feminism' already prima facie excludes men and male issues, but somehow also claims to promote men's rights via its definition. I also struggle to understand why some feminists, yourself included or so it seems to me at least, make it a point to express disappointment when someone who basically believes in the same things you believe, chooses not be called a feminist. Why is the problem the usage/non-usage of word 'feminist'/'feminism'? It is because of some of these confusions, I simply prefer not to label myself as 'feminist'.
@@AprilN I agree with you on the point that there are a number of confusing schools of thought within feminist ideology but that’s the thing. Every ideology, religion or philosophy I know has subscribers who are radical extremists or who act in a way that “disrupts” the tenets of that ideology but that doesn’t change the core message of the said ideology. And it’s a little shaky to dismiss said ideology based solely on this fact. Also, it’s alright not to want to call yourself a feminist. It’s the same way people prefer not to attach labels to themselves or the situations they’re in. I personally don’t have a problem with that. In fact, calling yourself a humanist actually makes more sense since you admit (and I agree) that the term feminism is gender-binary. However to some, believing in all this, yet refusing to take up the label of feminism might be living in denial, overly idealistic and being tone-deaf to the systematic oppression women worldwide have faced over the years. But yeah it is what it is. Every woman’s encounter with feminism should be a personal experience and a well-informed decision. Thank you for your response and looking forward to your next video💕😘
@@sedinambotwe8994 Actually calling herself a humanist doesn’t make more sense if what she is advocating for is equality. A lot of people in this comments section don’t know what humanism is. LOL. Please Google it. Humanists have as a core philosophy that human beings have the agency to order and direct their society how best they see fit and reject the providence of divinity. Are there humanists who believe in equality? Very much so, but that isn’t their core ideology. Humanism is more akin to secularism than egalitarianism. I know it sounds like it means what you all think it means, but it doesn’t. Feminism is gender binary and non-inclusive simply because with regards to sex discrimination, it is women who have been treated unequal by our society. It is women who were denied an education, relegated to the home and denied a seat at a table during the political process whilst their reproductive rights were placed on the menu. Is it wrong then for those who are determined to address this wrong to squarely name the problem they seek to confront? There are many injustices in our society; wealth inequality, healthcare disparity, mass incarceration, natural resource exploitation, sex trafficking and so on. You can believe in the ideal that all men and women are created equal, hence deserve dignity and as a result care deeply about each of these issues. However, it is impossible for each one of us to activate around each issue and be fully committed to addressing each one. That’s why we have climate activists, black lives matter activists, socialists as well as feminists who have picked an issue they care passionately about and are working ardently to solve it. At the end of the day, the world will be a more equal place because of the sum total work of all them.
the indoor agenda you are seeking is very wild but to the issue on men being superior is very dicey because some women want their men to be dominant or superior else they are viewed as weak whiles others disagree with it so for me we need to tread cautiously in dealing with the issue
Hi April, late to the discussion lol, maybe your opinions have even changed by now. Still - a comment I wanted to leave about why I am a feminist in direct response to some of your comments. 1) the goal of attaining equality for me begins with understanding the root of the inequality, which means understanding patriarchy and its related power structures that create and maintain the unequal value placed on male vs female (privileging male). Feminism isnt neutral because it opposes patriarchy first and foremost. I agree with that 100%. 2) the problem you seem to have with women wanting to be equal at home/in the domestic (as opposed to the law, education and economic) is not a problem to me. In fact, I think it is crucial because so much patriarchal violence is in the domestic and in the home. 3) I used to have the issue of 'feminism has too many theories' for me to identify with it. But the more I read, the more I listened and the more I engaged with people (in Ghana btw) the more I felt confident to claim the label and join the movement. There will always be disagreements within it and there may well be self-identified feminists that I don't think are feminists (from the way they analyse society or understand patriarchy or how they act) but that doesnt take away from me. The dialogue and the coming together only adds to feminism. And the goal is largely the same - that we all be free of patriarchy. 4) lastly, I urge you not to use your personal experience of having nice men in your life to dismiss millions of girls/women who have suffered because of men. Feminism is about ending structural and societal violence. And we are actually far from the experience youve had being the norm. (Also far from the picture you painted in your intro of 'general' belief in equality). Thank you for reading all this! And for your video.
![โรงเรียนห้ามรัก โดนจับได้ตาย...!! [เอิร์นไดเม่]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/4u02Sbr556Q/mqdefault.jpg)
What is your view on feminism? Do you agree with me? Would love to read your opinions and thoughts:))
I not only agree with you, April, but I'm also said to report that here in The US(and also parts of Europe and Australia)a line of thinking parallel to what you are describing has arisen among many men who call themselves Men's Rights Activist and/or Red Pill men. The sooner both feminism and The MRM die out, the saner our world shall be
Controversial topic but you have nailed it perfectly. Very articulate...well done!!!
April dear, you've spoken so much sense. It's no wonder you're a valedictorian. Great message. I'm glad i subscribed.
Hi April,
I actually really agree with a lot of the things you mentioned. And that is why I too struggle with the label. My major problem with feminism is the double standards. We see a lot of feminists using feminism as an excuse for certain unpardonable acts. But because they identify as feminists, they can’t/shouldn’t be criticized. I tend to see a lot of feminists blindly supporting other feminists just because they are feminists. That defeats the whole purpose to me. Again, if the fight is for equality, let the fight be for everyone not just a particular group of people.
I really liked the word you used; humanism. Why can’t we just want equality/equity for all? Do we have to put one section of the society down just to uplift another? Don’t we then just want to become the oppressors instead of the oppressed?
It also seems as if feminists are more attached to the label than what the movement is all about.
Oh LORDDDD oh LORDDDD!!! This is what I’ve been talking, explaining and ranting about. Oh LORDDD THANK YOUUU!!! Like reallyyyy THANK YOU FOR THIS VIDEO!❤️
Aw you're welcome dear 🤗 thank you for watching!
Agreeing with 95% of this. I believe what you are terming as "modern feminism" which goes extreme as hating men and women not in favour of the "modern feminism ideology" is NOT feminism. So you don't have to even term it as "modern feminism". They are just selfish people hiding under the "feminist " tag. The traditional meaning of feminism holds and will forever hold. Basically, what you are calling modern feminism is not even feminism to begin with. (Just selfishness and irrational behaviour, if you ask me)
From all that youve explained, still sounds to me like you're a feminist. Because feminism is basically equal rights for all genders. (The traditional meaning and only meaning ; not what you're calling modern)
Regardless, still makes sense to call yourself a humanist and ofcourse, you're free to say you're not feminist.
Great video though.
Lol this actually got me to subscribe and i do agree with the whole intro thingy😂
April I hear you, but it only seems to me that you may not have an in-depth appreciation of a lot of the things you mentioned but ofc I may be wrong about that and I’m willing to stand corrected. I’ll explain:
1. You got the stats wrong (Even pertaining to Ghana alone) that a lot of people agree with equality between men and women & I get why that could be because with the people we surround ourselves with and the small circles of people we meet in Ghana in our every day life, it’s easy to assume that everyone or at least most get the gag of what feminism is and agree with its “traditional” ideals and tenets. But April, this is not so and you would be very very surprised. Check the stats girl, just check. A lot lot lotttt of people are anti-feminists, trust.
2. You need to understand that at this time when the feminism movement is still at its peak and striving to be cemented in people’s minds, hearts and future lifestyles choices, influencers like yourself who come out to say “I am not feminist” can only hurt the movement. Now I’m not at all saying that you should at all cost identify as one because it is perfectly within your rights not to. And if for instance you weren’t for feminism ( equality of the sexes), that would be perfectly fine Bc you’re entitled to that much. My tiny worry is your reason for it. Now, like you rightly pointed out, there are different types of feminist ( not black and white like you mentioned because those are not types, those are just feminists who focus more contextually to the women problems that mainly affect their kind). Now if you find that a particular type of feminists ( while having the same basic tenets which is equality of the sexes) have in addition, other beliefs, why should that affect your identification as a feminist? Moreso when at this time, identifying as a feminist has power especially as an influencer. Even assuming that those types of feminists were committing crimes, like killing men and saying they’re feminists, first of all it doesn’t change the basic/traditional meaning of the movement for a person to say Bc of these groups of feminists, I’m no longer a feminist. Usually it wouldn’t matter, to me at least, but because feminism is still at its peak and as an influencer, identifying as a feminist has power, it just saddens me that you don’t identify as one.
3. Not that you should care, but I’m particularly uncomfortable listening to you try to “validate” how people who have been oppressed should react to their oppression and their oppressors. I call bs every time people label a section of feminists as “extreme” because in as much as I personally wouldn’t mind a man opening doors for me, I one hundred percent understand a woman who would and would rather not. There’s a whole history of pain, a whole history of oppression behind these things. People don’t get up and decide to be “hate” men, if you will. And for many it’s not just a history but present reality in a lot of things. People haven’t healed. People are still very much scarred. For that reason I’m uncomfortable telling people how to react to their oppression.
All this being said, you mentioned that you agree with the basic tenets of feminism. I think we’ll just take that.
1. yes, like i said there are a lot of people, particularly men who are anti-feminist and who are in fact misogynists. And I indicated that those type of people need to be put in their place, not for any strictly feminist reasons but for basic equality reasons, the basis being human rights.
2. I explained why I dont identify as one. If a certain philosophy or ideology contains views I do not agree with (and because feminism has many different strands, like you said, not necessarily based on race, but the actual types of feminists such as radicals, liberals, eco feminists and so on, and it so happens that I cannot fully agree with any of them), then I cannot consider myself a feminist. I do not see why you have to label yourself a 'feminist' to stand up for human rights of all people, regardless of their sex or sexual identity.
3. I dont think there's anything wrong with a woman not wanting a man to open the door for her. It is the aggression against men in general, even when declining such offer for example, which is problematic. Yes there is a historical aspect, as you rightly mentioned, my issue is how its being handled today, not the fact that we want to correct certain past injustices. Turning men against us (good men included) would not change the situation, which in my opinion should be the ultimate goal. I am not telling people how to feel, I am explaining why I'm not okay with how certain women who classify themselves as feminists behave. They behave this way toward men and sometimes even women (which is something I have experienced myself from people who call themselves feminists). I do not think it is right, neither do I think it is smart. To me, a history of pain and oppression is not an excuse to terrorize men and even some women. We can correct injustices through policy reform, affirmative action, advocacy and the law... the right way.
In my opinion, all this can be done without the tag 'feminist', a term which in today's reality has been warped to the extent that its meaning and what it stands for becomes controversial.
And I'm not saying women do not have the right to be angry, neither am I telling women how to react. I am simply explaining why in my view, it is not okay, and rather worsens the situation, instead of bettering it which should be the actual goal. It is just my perspective on the situation, not necessarily a declaration of what is right or wrong.
It seems that these days - whatever your gender - when asked if you are a feminist, your answer can only be damning.
Say no, and regardless of your own sex, you are branded a bigoted woman-hater. Probably even stupid and ignorant. You think women belong in the kitchen and men are the head of the household.
Say yes as a woman, and you are a bra-burning man-hater whose campaigning to “free the nipple” or show your underarm hair blinds you from real-world issues.
Say yes as a man, you’re instead branded as a “whipped soy boy” who is either labeling themselves as a feminist in a pathetic attempt to impress women, or to obey a domineering woman already in his life.
So… are these the only two options in society’s eyes?
What about the vast majority (I hope) of us who don’t subscribe to either of these extremes and believe that men and women - though often different in minor or superficial ways, are fundamentally the same
Sure, there really are many bigots out there, as well as some misguided so-called “feminists” who mistake a movement of equality for an infantile rampage of naïve, tunnel-visioned, and self-centered privilege. But I propose that most of today’s alleged “gender war” is largely fuelled by semantics, definitions, and unfortunate misunderstandings
I can't call myself a modern day feminist because feminism isn't what it used to be. Of course I probably won't be here if it hadn't been for women who fought throughout history for my right to have a voice. In this age we have what we call the third wave feminism. The feminist movement is usually broken up into three “waves.” The first wave in the late 19th and early 20th centuries pushed for political equality; basic control of their lives,. abolish slavery, the right to retain property, right to vote. The second wave, in the 1960s and 70s, pushed for legal and professional equality; right to use birth control, anti-sex discrimination laws, roe v. Wade . And the third wave, in the past couple decades, has pushed for social equality. This is a tricky business because you’re no longer dealing with institutions-you’re dealing with people’s perceptions and people’s brains. You have to confront belief systems and irrational assumptions and force people to unlearn things that they’ve “known” for decades. It’s a really, really hard thing to face. These feminists fight for what they believe to be a gender wage gap. They still advocate for"reproductive rights". They're still decrying the "Injustice of sexual discrimination". And their still battling "white patriarchy".
Today's feminism is a little too different because not only are the third waves very different from the former, they also differ from the pioneers
They are no longer just fighting for women to have the same rights as men, they are fighting for the emasculation of men, the fluidity of gender, uninhibited abortion and the resistance.
They parade around anatomical hearts, and iheart abortion t-shirts, they skip work to show their economic words. They tell other women they are an embarrassment to the female gender for simply holding different political views.
Now in order to be a feminist you not only have to be pro choice an anti patriarchy, you also have to embrace the LGBT agenda fully support planned parenthood.
Feminism has embraced a doctrine that attempts to fit women into an ideological mold which is ironic considering that's the very thing they say they're fighting against. A culture that pigeonholes women into thinking and acting in a way that seemed acceptable by society. I could make a long list of the additional inconsistencies of third wave feminism from their silence on the oppression of Islam and Sharia law to their embrace of celebrities whose lyrics words and actions do anything but elevate women eg.the recent WAP by Cardi B( I have alot to say about this song)
Third wave feminism isn't progress, it's hypocrisy.
I don't want to be a part of a movement that tells me I have to meet certain political prerequisites to be included. I want to care about women and humanity as a whole without an ideology that in many ways is diametrically opposed to my values.
I want women to be empowered and have opportunities to be whoever they want to be.
I can be outspoken career driven and ambitious and I can also be confident in those things without forsaking my principles and buying into the lie that feminism is the only means by which we can help ourselves and help other women. First and second wave feminism are still in violent need in other countries but no one is talking about that.
There are so many hypocrisies of modern day feminism:
*Feminists wanting job fields to be more diverse, especially when it comes to STEM fields. Thus, many schools have created special STEM programs - just for girls. This indirectly implies that women need special treatment to be included, to feel needed, to feel smart. And if girls make it out of those programs into others that aren’t specifically for women, they often end up in settings with overpowering, misogynistic men who will inevitably be waiting for them to mess up. This transition from exclusive, female environments can leave women not knowing how to handle workplace sexism.
These all-girl STEM programs set girls up for failure. While some might say “Don’t train the women, fix the men,” I believe everyone needs to make an effort in this fight.
By definition, feminism is the fight for equality.
*Feminist blaming men continuously for gender inequality and few women in Stem fields but ignoring research that provesif you let women and men make their choices, what actually happens is they specialize in different situations and you don't get equality of outcome. For example Scandinavian countries have moved more towards gender equality than any other countries. And the personality differences in Scandinavia have increased rather than decreased. And the proportion of women who are choosing STEM fields has decreased rather than increased. So as cultures become more gender neutral the number of women who choose STEM fields decrease. So if you let women and men make their choices, what actually happens is they specialize in different situations and you don't get equality of outcome. As countries get more egalitarian, the differences get larger than smaller. The scientific data on that is very clear. It was a shock to everyone to find that out. It having the opposite effect that the gender equality types predicted. It isn't a theory, it's actually data driven by tens of thousands of surveys and the best scientific literature on the topic.
*A feminist who believes it is a man’s obligation to pay for a date: hypocritical.
*If a feminist believes violence against women is bad but thinks violence against men is ok (but who thinks this? Not alot of people but feminists reluctance to help fight for violence against men proves this): hypocritical.
*Feminist initiatives like #HeForShe impose on men the very gender roles feminists claim it tries to eliminate.
It just adds one detail: Only fill those roles for the benefit of women, never because it's natural or comfortable for you. And never expect to have your masculinity considered BY women while they're busy demanding you be strong & commanding against other men on women's behalf, because your humanity is secondary to your function as a shield/beast of burden for women.
*Feminist propaganda campaigns like "Don't be that guy" do the same thing - make every man, specifically BECAUSE of standards for masculinity, responsible for the safety of women who can't or won't be responsible for themselves
Meanwhile, feminists clearly feel entitled to tell men which feelings they're allowed to express Feeling girly? Great! You're a feminist!
Feeling a need for human companionship? Get the heck outta here, creep!
Feeling hurt over being rejected? Now you're a misogynist!
Resent the damage done when you were circumcised? Don't expect help from feminists. They're too busy lining up to tell you that women, whose genital integrity is legally protected throughout the vast majority of the world in many nations where yours isn't & even where neonatal male genital cutting is common, have it worse. And they'll tell you that you're a misogynist if you think the more widespread cutting practice is anywhere near as bad of a problem as the comparitively rare one.
Heart broken because your children were taken from you in a divorce? Don't look to feminists for help. They're too busy opposing equally shared parenting legislation.
Would you feel more comfortable with equal reproductive rights, such as a legal equivalent to women's "safe haven" option? Don't look to feminists for help with that, either. They're too busy demanding stricter child support enforcement against you.
Hurt or afraid because you're being abused by your wife, girlfriend or a woman in your family? Don't look to feminism for that, either. They've spent the last 40+ years telling the public that doesn't happen, and if it does, it's "preemptive self defense" because they believe you'll inevitibly hit back.
Trauma from being assaulted or even raped by a sexually aggressive woman? Yeah, don't look to feminism for help with that either. Feminist research on sexual violence has been carefully designed to avoid evidence of experiences like yours so they can paint sexual violence as a male behavior & blame you for it.
Has your life been wrecked by false accusations? Don't expect feminists to care how you feel about that, either. Their story on your experience varies from "it's not as bad as experiencing (whatever crime you were falsely accused of) or "It's ok to sacrifice a few innocent men to ensure we catch all men guilty of (whatever the crime) as if hurting you somehow helps real victims of that crime... to "it's no big deal, because it's rare" as if rarity makes a crime less heinous ... to "This is beneficial - the falsely accused could learn something from the experience" as if you had no sympathy for victims prior & any harm done is negated by changing that... to "Women don't lie about (the crime) so it can't be false" even if you have evidence of your innocence.
So men are supposed to express your feelings, except when it's not convenient for feminists, such as when you've been raped, abused, alienated, or falsely accused BY A WOMAN... or permanently scarred in a way that they feel competes with a female victim narrative.
Feminists want:
The rights of men
Privileges of women
The responsibilities of neither
But feminism is totally NOT about hating men, right?
@@doreenkuunapor6807 I can't call myself a modern day feminist because feminism isn't what it used to be. Of course I probably won't be here if it hadn't been for women who fought throughout history for my right to have a voice. In this age we have what we call the third wave feminism. The feminist movement is usually broken up into three “waves.” The first wave in the late 19th and early 20th centuries pushed for political equality; basic control of their lives,. abolish slavery, the right to retain property, right to vote. The second wave, in the 1960s and 70s, pushed for legal and professional equality; right to use birth control, anti-sex discrimination laws, roe v. Wade . And the third wave, in the past couple decades, has pushed for social equality. This is a tricky business because you’re no longer dealing with institutions-you’re dealing with people’s perceptions and people’s brains. You have to confront belief systems and irrational assumptions and force people to unlearn things that they’ve “known” for decades. It’s a really, really hard thing to face. These feminists fight for what they believe to be a gender wage gap. They still advocate for"reproductive rights". They're still decrying the "Injustice of sexual discrimination". And their still battling "white patriarchy".
Today's feminism is a little too different because not only are the third waves very different from the former, they also differ from the pioneers
They are no longer just fighting for women to have the same rights as men, they are fighting for the emasculation of men, the fluidity of gender, uninhibited abortion and the resistance.
They parade around anatomical hearts, and iheart abortion t-shirts, they skip work to show their economic words. They tell other women they are an embarrassment to the female gender for simply holding different political views.
Now in order to be a feminist you not only have to be pro choice an anti patriarchy, you also have to embrace the LGBT agenda fully support planned parenthood.
Feminism has embraced a doctrine that attempts to fit women into an ideological mold which is ironic considering that's the very thing they say they're fighting against. A culture that pigeonholes women into thinking and acting in a way that seemed acceptable by society. I could make a long list of the additional inconsistencies of third wave feminism from their silence on the oppression of Islam and Sharia law to their embrace of celebrities whose lyrics words and actions do anything but elevate women eg.the recent WAP by Cardi B( I have alot to say about this song)
Third wave feminism isn't progress, it's hypocrisy.
I don't want to be a part of a movement that tells me I have to meet certain political prerequisites to be included. I want to care about women and humanity as a whole without an ideology that in many ways is diametrically opposed to my values.
I want women to be empowered and have opportunities to be whoever they want to be.
I can be outspoken career driven and ambitious and I can also be confident in those things without forsaking my principles and buying into the lie that feminism is the only means by which we can help ourselves and help other women. First and second wave feminism are still in violent need in other countries but no one is talking about that.
There are so many hypocrisies of modern day feminism:
*Feminists wanting job fields to be more diverse, especially when it comes to STEM fields. Thus, many schools have created special STEM programs - just for girls. This indirectly implies that women need special treatment to be included, to feel needed, to feel smart. And if girls make it out of those programs into others that aren’t specifically for women, they often end up in settings with overpowering, misogynistic men who will inevitably be waiting for them to mess up. This transition from exclusive, female environments can leave women not knowing how to handle workplace sexism.
These all-girl STEM programs set girls up for failure. While some might say “Don’t train the women, fix the men,” I believe everyone needs to make an effort in this fight.
By definition, feminism is the fight for equality.
*Feminist blaming men continuously for gender inequality and few women in Stem fields but ignoring research that provesif you let women and men make their choices, what actually happens is they specialize in different situations and you don't get equality of outcome. For example Scandinavian countries have moved more towards gender equality than any other countries. And the personality differences in Scandinavia have increased rather than decreased. And the proportion of women who are choosing STEM fields has decreased rather than increased. So as cultures become more gender neutral the number of women who choose STEM fields decrease. So if you let women and men make their choices, what actually happens is they specialize in different situations and you don't get equality of outcome. As countries get more egalitarian, the differences get larger than smaller. The scientific data on that is very clear. It was a shock to everyone to find that out. It having the opposite effect that the gender equality types predicted. It isn't a theory, it's actually data driven by tens of thousands of surveys and the best scientific literature on the topic.
*A feminist who believes it is a man’s obligation to pay for a date: hypocritical.
*If a feminist believes violence against women is bad but thinks violence against men is ok (but who thinks this? Not alot of people but feminists reluctance to help fight for violence against men proves this): hypocritical.
*Feminist initiatives like #HeForShe impose on men the very gender roles feminists claim it tries to eliminate.
It just adds one detail: Only fill those roles for the benefit of women, never because it's natural or comfortable for you. And never expect to have your masculinity considered BY women while they're busy demanding you be strong & commanding against other men on women's behalf, because your humanity is secondary to your function as a shield/beast of burden for women.
*Feminist propaganda campaigns like "Don't be that guy" do the same thing - make every man, specifically BECAUSE of standards for masculinity, responsible for the safety of women who can't or won't be responsible for themselves
Meanwhile, feminists clearly feel entitled to tell men which feelings they're allowed to express Feeling girly? Great! You're a feminist!
Feeling a need for human companionship? Get the heck outta here, creep!
Feeling hurt over being rejected? Now you're a misogynist!
Resent the damage done when you were circumcised? Don't expect help from feminists. They're too busy lining up to tell you that women, whose genital integrity is legally protected throughout the vast majority of the world in many nations where yours isn't & even where neonatal male genital cutting is common, have it worse. And they'll tell you that you're a misogynist if you think the more widespread cutting practice is anywhere near as bad of a problem as the comparitively rare one.
Heart broken because your children were taken from you in a divorce? Don't look to feminists for help. They're too busy opposing equally shared parenting legislation.
Would you feel more comfortable with equal reproductive rights, such as a legal equivalent to women's "safe haven" option? Don't look to feminists for help with that, either. They're too busy demanding stricter child support enforcement against you.
Hurt or afraid because you're being abused by your wife, girlfriend or a woman in your family? Don't look to feminism for that, either. They've spent the last 40+ years telling the public that doesn't happen, and if it does, it's "preemptive self defense" because they believe you'll inevitibly hit back.
Trauma from being assaulted or even raped by a sexually aggressive woman? Yeah, don't look to feminism for help with that either. Feminist research on sexual violence has been carefully designed to avoid evidence of experiences like yours so they can paint sexual violence as a male behavior & blame you for it.
Has your life been wrecked by false accusations? Don't expect feminists to care how you feel about that, either. Their story on your experience varies from "it's not as bad as experiencing (whatever crime you were falsely accused of) or "It's ok to sacrifice a few innocent men to ensure we catch all men guilty of (whatever the crime) as if hurting you somehow helps real victims of that crime... to "it's no big deal, because it's rare" as if rarity makes a crime less heinous ... to "This is beneficial - the falsely accused could learn something from the experience" as if you had no sympathy for victims prior & any harm done is negated by changing that... to "Women don't lie about (the crime) so it can't be false" even if you have evidence of your innocence.
So men are supposed to express your feelings, except when it's not convenient for feminists, such as when you've been raped, abused, alienated, or falsely accused BY A WOMAN... or permanently scarred in a way that they feel competes with a female victim narrative.
Feminists want:
The rights of men
Privileges of women
The responsibilities of neither
But feminism is totally NOT about hating men, right?
I found myself in agreement with a good portion of the points you made here. Especially about the humanism part and why that's generally more important than feminism. I'll like you to clarify a of couple things you mentioned though if you don't mind:
1. Do you think the mismatch between the definition of feminism like you stated and the actions of some of the feminists is necessarily a good enough reason to unsubscribe from the feminism? To clarify my question a bit more, I'm assuming you generally agree in principle with the ideals of feminism because you mentioned that you do but the behaviour of some feminists is what you don't agree with. So I guess what I'm really trying to find out is that is it possible to still be a feminist and disagree with the behaviour of some feminists?
2. This is like a follow up question from the first. Do you think there is a possibility that you're overestimating the amount of "bad actors" in the modern feminist movement? and if there is a possibility, what do you think would be a good way to find that out?
3. lastly lol at 11:36 . Do you think it helps to encourage women to use tactics like that? Do you think anyone with a form of power should be open manipulating others with it?
I like your questions and I have a lot to say to answer them but unfortunately this medium is not very conducive for that. I will try to explain as much as I can though:
1.In a way, yes I do think there is a mismatch. But it depends on the type of feminism we are talking about. Some types of feminism, for example, radical and to an extent cultural feminism, want to completely restructure the basis of society towards matriarchy and overthrow the patriarchal structure which according to them is present today (im not saying it isnt). In this case, I do not really see a mismatch because the "modern feminists", as I call them, in a way complement and are motivated by radical feminism agenda. I do think that if you strictly classify yourself as a liberal feminist or an individualist feminist, it might seem as though you are contradicting yourself by acting like some "modern feminists". On the other hand, if we are talking strictly about the general definition of feminism, I do not think there must necessarily be a mismatch. It depends on what exactly a particular "modern feminist" stands for. Some claim superiority, others simply ostracize men without necessarily claiming or wanting to be superior to them. But generally, yes I do think a person can classify themselves as a feminist and disagree with the behaviour of other feminists.
2. I do not think I am necessarily overestimating the bad actors. It is quite difficult to measure something like that. And my point is not necessarily related to the number of bad actors out there but the fact that they exist in the first place and have largely taken over the field in the media.
MY perspective: My problem with feminism is that it is filled with so many theories and diverging opinions which makes it difficult for us in the contemporary world to even know what actually feminism is. I, for example, cannot classify all the people who claim to be feminists as feminists under the general definition, when sometimes their goal and methods for reaching those goals blatantly contrast. The method of reaching a goal is also important to me, especially if I believe the method to be more detrimental than helpful in attaining a particular goal. Of all the types of feminism I have read about, I cannot fully agree with all the goals and methods of even one of them. So i prefer not to call myself a feminist, to avoid confusion on the whole matter. Do I believe men and women should be equal in terms of fundamental structures in society and before the law? Absolutely yes. We are all human beings and are entitled to be treated equally or equitably depending on the situation.
3. I see what you mean here. I wasnt being totally serious about that; should have rephrased it.
@@AprilN Thanks for the response. I think you explained yourself good enough here. If I understand you correctly, the contrast amongst the various ideologies in the movement is a big part of why you're uncomfortable identifying as a Feminist. Also that the most popular and loudest voices tend to be that of the "bad actors" which is not a representation you are necessarily comfortable with. From what I gathered I think you explained well enough what's generally discouraging you from identifying as a feminist.
Also thanks for clarifying the last question. I had a slight suspicion it was a joke but had to ask to be sure.
Western Feminism begins as protecting the rights of Women but end in Tribalist Gender Wars, Feminism is no friend to African Culture, just ask the hoards of Diaspora American ADOS fleeing the failed Black American Community. African Women, don't make a similar mistake of "Throwing the Baby out with the bath water", and "Be Weary of Greeks bearing Gifts". American BMGTOW
I think that yeah what you say is true to some extent but a lot of people have misconstrued the true feminism. There are a lot of women who are angry and bitter about certain injustices that they have experienced and they blame men entirely for these things but sometimes these problems that women face are even caused by their fellow women and so instead of addressing these issues independently, they turn around and say they’re feminists.
Feminism shouldn’t be that we kill all men in the world and let only women exist, and that’s how women will be safe because men are bad. Men and women coexist to help each other fulfill their purposes on earth, women need men as much as men do. We all need to learn to understand what are individuals roles are and perform them.
Women can fight for equality and fight for their voices to be heard but not to the detriment of other human beings. For me we are all human beings and have the right to exist here on earth and no man or woman has the right to use their power to make another person uncomfortable for existing.
Modern feminism is filled with some angry bitter women who who fail to understand their worth and so go round making a lot of noise especially in Ghana, small heartbreak noorr the girl says she’s now a feminist. It’s not the best, it’s just turning girls into arrogant people who will miss a lot of opportunities because they do not respect men.
If you know your worth as a woman no man can take advantage of you or infringe on your rights.
Hi dear I like your out spoken that is true, and the truth heats, I am your new subscribers, keep going love
I 100% agree with you
You will be suprised how the 'feminists' will come for you in the comment section. But I surely love and appreciate how deep you are in expressing your thoughts.
This video just made me a subscriber 💯
Ffiiiirsst to waaattcchhh... Thanks for these educative videos
Thank you too for watching dear🙏🏽 I really appreciate it
And generalizing it like that. I mean " feminism in Africa" undermines some important things that feminism & human rights movement have done in Africa like fighting against FGM & early forced marriages because people on the internet have made the term annoying lol
Oh I certainly acknowledge everything that has been done to uplift and empower women in Africa, including the examples you're giving.
Not sure what you mean by "generalising it like that" 🤔
Yes my problem is with the label "feminist" and what it actually seems to mean today..
I like all your points in this video. In my opinion, I think your preception of the societal roles of men and women in society is accurate (i.e., not pesemistic nor optimistic). I think youre very fortunate to have a mind that lends its self to view society from a practical/realistic standpoint. But I also believe that most people do not think the way that you think. Being said, even though they are not true, I think catchphrases like "women can do anything that a man can do" are still worth saying because they motivate women to participate in male dominated activities. However in the same breath, I do agree that such catchphrases are false and a more accurate catchphrase would be "men and women and different strengths" or even more accurate, "in general, people have different strengths". Hmm.
This video makes me think. I like this video lol. thanks!
Totally agree with you!
Hello from Washington, DC. I just subscribed to your channel
Yesss humanist! Amen Amennnn
Girls saying men are trash should see this
Some men are bad and some women are bad. Some men are sexist and some wonen are sexist. Why is this so hard to understand?
Interesting video, April.
But your reason for not being a “feminist” doesn’t sit right with me. And from your explanations, it seems that you actually are a feminist. What you term as modern feminism is simply a branch on the big tree called feminism. It is a hasty generalization to judge a tree as rotten when only one branch is rotten.
It’s alright to disagree with women who claim men aren’t necessary to their existence but to simply invalidate feminism as a whole for that reason is a logical fallacy.
I like the fact that you do recognize the role that patriarchy and patriarchal stereotypes play in society, using yourself as an example. Because recognizing this and knowing how much you as a woman are actually capable of (and rising to the occasion each time) actually does make you (surprise surprise) a feminist.
I don’t doubt that fact that you’ve read and researched before making this video but it would be great to actually do more research (both desktop and actual interaction with all types of feminists) so you have a better understanding of feminism and how important you are to the movement.
I admire your consistency as a YT blogger, keep at it! 😘
Thanks for your comment! My problem with feminism is that it is filled with so many theories and diverging opinions which makes it difficult for us in the contemporary world to even know what actually feminism is. I for example cannot classify all the people who claim to be feminists as feminists under the general definition of feminism, when sometimes their goals and methods for reaching those goals blatantly contrast. The method of reaching a goal is also important to me, especially if I believe the method to be more detrimental than helpful in attaining a particular goal. How do you classify such different agendas and methods under one umbrella?
Of the types of feminism I have read about, I cannot fully agree with all the tenets and methods of even one of them. So I prefer not to call myself a feminist, to avoid confusion on the whole matter. Do I believe men and women should be equal in terms of fundamental structures in society and before the law? Absolutely yes. We are all human beings and are entitled to be treated equally or equitably, depending on the situation.
Moreover, the term 'feminism', is gender binary and non-inclusive, instead of being gender neutral. If equality is what we want, why don't we use that term? The word 'feminism' already prima facie excludes men and male issues, but somehow also claims to promote men's rights via its definition.
I also struggle to understand why some feminists, yourself included or so it seems to me at least, make it a point to express disappointment when someone who basically believes in the same things you believe, chooses not be called a feminist. Why is the problem the usage/non-usage of word 'feminist'/'feminism'?
It is because of some of these confusions, I simply prefer not to label myself as 'feminist'.
@@AprilN I agree with you on the point that there are a number of confusing schools of thought within feminist ideology but that’s the thing. Every ideology, religion or philosophy I know has subscribers who are radical extremists or who act in a way that “disrupts” the tenets of that ideology but that doesn’t change the core message of the said ideology. And it’s a little shaky to dismiss said ideology based solely on this fact.
Also, it’s alright not to want to call yourself a feminist. It’s the same way people prefer not to attach labels to themselves or the situations they’re in. I personally don’t have a problem with that. In fact, calling yourself a humanist actually makes more sense since you admit (and I agree) that the term feminism is gender-binary.
However to some, believing in all this, yet refusing to take up the label of feminism might be living in denial, overly idealistic and being tone-deaf to the systematic oppression women worldwide have faced over the years.
But yeah it is what it is. Every woman’s encounter with feminism should be a personal experience and a well-informed decision. Thank you for your response and looking forward to your next video💕😘
@@sedinambotwe8994 Actually calling herself a humanist doesn’t make more sense if what she is advocating for is equality. A lot of people in this comments section don’t know what humanism is. LOL. Please Google it.
Humanists have as a core philosophy that human beings have the agency to order and direct their society how best they see fit and reject the providence of divinity. Are there humanists who believe in equality? Very much so, but that isn’t their core ideology. Humanism is more akin to secularism than egalitarianism. I know it sounds like it means what you all think it means, but it doesn’t.
Feminism is gender binary and non-inclusive simply because with regards to sex discrimination, it is women who have been treated unequal by our society. It is women who were denied an education, relegated to the home and denied a seat at a table during the political process whilst their reproductive rights were placed on the menu.
Is it wrong then for those who are determined to address this wrong to squarely name the problem they seek to confront?
There are many injustices in our society; wealth inequality, healthcare disparity, mass incarceration, natural resource exploitation, sex trafficking and so on. You can believe in the ideal that all men and women are created equal, hence deserve dignity and as a result care deeply about each of these issues.
However, it is impossible for each one of us to activate around each issue and be fully committed to addressing each one. That’s why we have climate activists, black lives matter activists, socialists as well as feminists who have picked an issue they care passionately about and are working ardently to solve it.
At the end of the day, the world will be a more equal place because of the sum total work of all them.
@@raynes1957 wow, thank you. Every day I learn something new.
Nice
Beautiful smile 😏
Thank you:)
the indoor agenda you are seeking is very wild but to the issue on men being superior is very dicey because some women want their men to be dominant or superior else they are viewed as weak whiles others disagree with it so for me we need to tread cautiously in dealing with the issue
Hi April, late to the discussion lol, maybe your opinions have even changed by now. Still - a comment I wanted to leave about why I am a feminist in direct response to some of your comments.
1) the goal of attaining equality for me begins with understanding the root of the inequality, which means understanding patriarchy and its related power structures that create and maintain the unequal value placed on male vs female (privileging male). Feminism isnt neutral because it opposes patriarchy first and foremost. I agree with that 100%.
2) the problem you seem to have with women wanting to be equal at home/in the domestic (as opposed to the law, education and economic) is not a problem to me. In fact, I think it is crucial because so much patriarchal violence is in the domestic and in the home.
3) I used to have the issue of 'feminism has too many theories' for me to identify with it. But the more I read, the more I listened and the more I engaged with people (in Ghana btw) the more I felt confident to claim the label and join the movement. There will always be disagreements within it and there may well be self-identified feminists that I don't think are feminists (from the way they analyse society or understand patriarchy or how they act) but that doesnt take away from me. The dialogue and the coming together only adds to feminism. And the goal is largely the same - that we all be free of patriarchy.
4) lastly, I urge you not to use your personal experience of having nice men in your life to dismiss millions of girls/women who have suffered because of men. Feminism is about ending structural and societal violence. And we are actually far from the experience youve had being the norm. (Also far from the picture you painted in your intro of 'general' belief in equality).
Thank you for reading all this! And for your video.