Why narcissists do not always discard their Significant Other

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 19 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 66

  • @IsabellaPiesch
    @IsabellaPiesch 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +36

    They keep you because they want to use you. That is all.

  • @shahnazbi8346
    @shahnazbi8346 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    Mine died of stage 4 metatastic brain cancer after 31 years of marriage.
    It was only after he died that i realised he had been suffering from narcissism.
    He was the best son the best brother the best grandson the best nephew the best friend the best work colleague the best neighbour but the very worst father and husband.
    The children and I always came last on his list of priorities.
    I wish i had never set eyes on him but then you can't change the past can you 😢 .

  • @latchkeykid5529
    @latchkeykid5529 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +35

    After 8 years the hardest thing to come to terms with is that you were just being played the whole time.

    • @BeTheLight624
      @BeTheLight624 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Yes, that hit me in the head like a 2 X 4 after I realized it in hindsight after going no contact. I was in somewhat of a zombie state, still functioning, for a good part of last summer, while he kept trying to break my request for no contact…further lack of respect and not wanting to give his power away. I never broke no contact. To go back to your statement, for me it was the ultimate humiliation. The person I dearly loved repulses me now.

    • @dodibenabba525
      @dodibenabba525 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Try 33 years

  • @galaxy98765
    @galaxy98765 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +32

    You sort of just described my parents. They were married for 46 years. I wish my mom had been strong enough to kick him out of the house and divorce him when I was 6 or younger.
    When she died, my father turned his rage, his devaluations and his put-downs onto me full-time, not just part-time, as had been the case for 42 years. His flying monkeys are still everywhere, and he died 15 years ago. I have been looking for some precious belongings of mine for years (photos and other items), and I just found out seven months ago that my father, unbeknownst to me, had taken them and sent them off to people he knew around the world. Things that other people would have no interest in. My father liked to steal things from me, because he enjoyed imagining me upset if and when I found those things missing. I guess my father was a sadist, too.
    😢

    • @kellyandaaron2005
      @kellyandaaron2005 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      My heart goes out to you 😔💛

    • @galaxy98765
      @galaxy98765 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      @@kellyandaaron2005 Thank you so much. Your compassion means a lot to me.
      Have a wonderful day.

    • @Thespiritleads777
      @Thespiritleads777 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Unfortunately, your father seems to be the malignant kind. I’m sorry you got dealt such hand. I pray for healing for you

    • @galaxy98765
      @galaxy98765 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@Thespiritleads777 Thank you so very much. Your words mean a lot to me. It's nice to know that there are people like you out there.
      I wish for you the best.
      🌅🌅🌅

    • @earnyourimmortality
      @earnyourimmortality 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      When I was a kid, my siblings use to take drawings I'd made & I'd find them in the garbage. In my teens, I had "friends" that would conspire against me out of envy of my talents, looks, etc. Now as a grown man, my xnarc hid my art & poetry books & claimed they were missing. When people envy what you have, regardless of what that may be, they'll do things to sabotage you in anyway possible. Get & keep them out of your life as soon as, & if, possible

  • @kellyandaaron2005
    @kellyandaaron2005 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +31

    In his last letter to me before I went no contact, he told me he would have kept the relationship going forever even though it was unhealthy. He's in his 50's and he knew finding someone to tolerate his nonsense for very long was low.

    • @RandallGlatt
      @RandallGlatt 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      Self respect there's no way

    • @westcoast747
      @westcoast747 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      That’s why a lot of narcissists change their partners so regularly, when you see through them and their mind games.

    • @petert6543
      @petert6543 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      Mines female and turns 51 next month haven't seen or heard from her in 6 months then last Sunday she called me and rang me again last night at 5am and told me she is old and know one wants or love her any more and that she loved me that's when I 😂😂😂 and hung up on her.
      Joke of a human

    • @Phoenixrising0000
      @Phoenixrising0000 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Mine is 52 ...blew up our life when I woke up...his supply I found out was escorts and prostitutes...7 years ...karma is going to hurt.

  • @Victoria-c4n
    @Victoria-c4n 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Narcissists NEED to be married; it’s a form of ownership & control.

    • @AshleyJones-kw8bv
      @AshleyJones-kw8bv 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      The spouse I believe is the ultimate victim.

  • @carolovesteven
    @carolovesteven 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    Some are leaves-they just blow away. Some are branches-they stand until a heavy storm comes and breaks them off. And then there’s the roots. Roots are grounded. Nothing moves them. If you’re ever blessed enough to have a root in your life-hold on to that root. Roots are strong and a rare find and are a blessing in anyones life. ✨♥️✨

  • @chereeB-hummingbird
    @chereeB-hummingbird 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

    Hi Joe✨️
    I met the narc when I was 27 he was 39
    I'm now 39 he is 52
    I was with him 11yrs had enough at 10 ..he played the victim useing the married card! I married him it lasted bearly a year ohh and ghosted me on the wedding day then came home that day ,like what he did was normal👀..I kicked it out last January. After discovery of some evil he did. also i just had enough! Thank you for your content. 💙
    The more I educate myself the more it make's sense!..healing no contact!✨️🔥🙏🏾

  • @AremAsha
    @AremAsha 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    @5:00 or they cheat with other married people who also have skin in the game and won’t blow their cover.

    • @dodibenabba525
      @dodibenabba525 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Truth they're big on swinging

  • @theoracle5265
    @theoracle5265 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Your example of someone you know that said enough, that was my situation after 37 years of pure garbage I got out. It took everything I had and Gods help to leave my exwife, she is a monster!

  • @CleoPatra67
    @CleoPatra67 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    His wife… his door mate, mom
    of their children. She’s not aware. Poor soul… he is 56 she 60. Thy are Together since 26 years

  • @bah667
    @bah667 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I remember early on. I said to her, you need a hobie."
    She said ...
    But you ARE my hobie.
    I should have walked away then.
    Peace.

  • @htpm325
    @htpm325 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +14

    I think there are many reasons for narcissists to keep their significant other and vice versa. Could be financial, cultural, children, extended family and even fear. They are after all mostly cowards. And if they have a circle of people, probably mostly family then the triangulation factor can be a good source of supply.
    I also think that in the long term relationships the significant other is high on the codependant spectrum.
    There are many naive 40, 50 and 60 year olds out there so I think a 50 yr old narc can still be a player but I don't know what the dating regime is like for older folks especially 55+.
    It is sad when you see these old couples where they just hate each other and their hate becomes routine and they kind of live in it.
    Love your discussions.
    Would love to hear your thoughts about why narcissists congregate in packs.
    Peace!

    • @erikkasepiphany
      @erikkasepiphany 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      They are complete cowards.

  • @stylist62
    @stylist62 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    They are so sleepy and toxic especially the covert, we really have to find a way to help those they prey on, before they
    Destroy them, the narc sees nothing wrong with multiple wives and girlfriends🤮🤮
    I hope it was a good wound leaving him, Mr handsome thinks he’s GODS gift🤣🤣Yes I am much older🤣had no idea what I was dealing with. They are really good at being evil even if your smart.

  • @model1976
    @model1976 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Love your voice. Thank you.

  • @WorkingProgress17
    @WorkingProgress17 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    What you just said about the age gap makes perfect sense now. With my ex husband, there was a 21 year difference. I get it now.

  • @ianjohnston7469
    @ianjohnston7469 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    over 40 single, hurts bro

  • @sonlya2010
    @sonlya2010 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    They pick up the same demon when they stay

  • @KleeKaiBreeders
    @KleeKaiBreeders 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Truth✅ excellent video as always. Thank you!

  • @kp153
    @kp153 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I believe that the only reason the current supply of the narc has lasted years (when before in other relationships he only lasted months) it’s because of his unearned scam money. The current supply is also a narcissist too. Very shallow. Cares about appearances too much to the point it’s giving gold digger. When his well of money dries up (and it has before) she’ll probably leave unless he’s got her trauma bonded as heck already.

  • @SupBro31
    @SupBro31 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    until they do

    • @goboudou
      @goboudou 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Yes

  • @septube26
    @septube26 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    well that was depressing.

  • @lioubovgrant1935
    @lioubovgrant1935 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Good morning ! 🌞 a cup of joe ☕☕ with Joe !!! everything is back to normal 😊 I think keeper would be someone with no backbone , in any other case she or he say in one day , the hell with this kind of life i am out here. Thank you for more of magic of Joe B. House ! 🤗❤

    • @joebhouse
      @joebhouse  11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Agreed...
      Amd thanks for your kind comments! ❤

    • @RandallGlatt
      @RandallGlatt 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Theirs just not much supply with these doormats...

    • @lioubovgrant1935
      @lioubovgrant1935 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@joebhouse Thank you for posting again ! 😊

    • @lioubovgrant1935
      @lioubovgrant1935 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@RandallGlatt but only doormats would put up with narcs crap , not doormats will be goneeeeeee 🏃🏃‍♂🏃‍♀

  • @deb2319
    @deb2319 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Joe how do u think a narcissist was made? Parental neglect ..parental abuse..is my guess. Do you have a talk on this topic?.

    • @fainitesbarley2245
      @fainitesbarley2245 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Listen to Professor Sam Vaknin.

    • @Thunder-lightning852
      @Thunder-lightning852 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      I can also be spoiled rotten

    • @SaraConners-o3g
      @SaraConners-o3g 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      @@fainitesbarley2245 Yeah maybe just as long as they know he himself is a narc, which in a few videos admits to, also I don't really think it is a good idea to listen to a narc about narc issues, you know how they lie

    • @RandallGlatt
      @RandallGlatt 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      ​@@Thunder-lightning852That's the golden child

    • @RandallGlatt
      @RandallGlatt 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Bad parenting plus some are just going to be born like that genrtically..

  • @manbearpig7950
    @manbearpig7950 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Can 2 narcissist stay in a relationship long term, like 20yrs. I know a couple like this,they both act the same but could it be that one is not a narc but has some other mental illness

    • @erikkasepiphany
      @erikkasepiphany 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      I’ve researched this. Often times women who display similar behavior and personality traits are histrionic, they are gold diggers and also are using the relationship for something. And yes it can happen. He wants her to be his trophy 🏆 wife and she wants him to be her security $ blanket aka sugar daddy and they are both using each other for gain. Neither will ever be fulfilled.

    • @manbearpig7950
      @manbearpig7950 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@erikkasepiphany thank you. That explains a lot.

  • @glennosborn8400
    @glennosborn8400 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    She did admit she needs professional help and is looking.

  • @jb9940
    @jb9940 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Or what they’ll play a good side piece they will go after other men’s women to get supply smh

  • @glennosborn8400
    @glennosborn8400 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    No sheet... that's ORIGINAL

  • @TriniStarr3527
    @TriniStarr3527 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

    🙏💙

  • @wafflesofmaxconsupmption7145
    @wafflesofmaxconsupmption7145 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    kailan kaya.

  • @PrayingWarfare
    @PrayingWarfare 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Except It's bit easier for female narcs.

    • @bah667
      @bah667 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Yes
      But in the end, it backfires on them.
      The term, the more the merrier, isn't always true. 😂😂😂

  • @Thespiritleads777
    @Thespiritleads777 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Holy Molly! My ex actually used the word “keeper” 🫤