How to deal with loneliness with Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 19 ต.ค. 2022
  • Speaking from personal experience during his four-and-a-half-year wandering retreat, Mingyur Rinpoche teaches us how to work with a sense of loneliness. Most importantly, he invites us to appreciate friends both near and far, extrinsic and intrinsic - as well as the very solitude itself.
    This teaching is from Tergar’s Joy of Living online program. To learn more, click joy.tergar.org.
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    🔗 Joy of Living Meditation Program: Learn meditation under the skillful guidance of Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche at your own pace.
    joy.tergar.org/
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    🔗 Vajrayana Online: Study and practice of the Tibetan Buddhism with Mingyur Rinpoche.
    learning.tergar.org/
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    🔗Online events, retreats with Mingyur Rinpoche events.tergar.org/
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    🔗 About Tergar Path: tergar.org/programs/

ความคิดเห็น • 117

  • @carpenterfamily6198
    @carpenterfamily6198 ปีที่แล้ว +130

    I sometimes feel lonely, but not when I’m alone. It’s when I’m with other people but am not feeling the genuine connection that I desire. I wish joyfulness to all beings 🙏

    • @sweetheart8216
      @sweetheart8216 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Maybe because you are stuck in the idea no one understands me. If you try to understand yourself enough, communicate sincerely with yourself by writing you will find what he call above "your consciousness become your refuge".
      Others aren't here to understand you in fact but they are the mirror to reflect what you don't see again within.
      Namaste 🙏🏻

    • @oscartravis5740
      @oscartravis5740 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same, but more from a feeling of suspicion and mistrust as our economic system encourages and rewards a slow crushing of one another, and any feeling of kinship or solidarity has been eroded. It is as though we shouldn't help others in need, but watch them wither so we might rifle through their pockets when they finally collapse. Material wealth has burned every other feeling down to ash in sacrifice to its false gods and fetishised idols. All I'm left with is a numbness inside where human connection used to be.

    • @_bluephoenix_
      @_bluephoenix_ ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yes! I find superficial engagements often leave me more hollow and drained than, if I was to stay at home and enjoy my own company.
      I do get a bit sad I dont have the social life that others can enjoy but, I have learned to enjoy what I have and the few friends I know I can turn to when needed.
      Many blessings to you.

    • @iloveFreedom.
      @iloveFreedom. ปีที่แล้ว

      @@oscartravis5740 ...yeah, I guess it's good to notice what's going on, and there's Also...Life doing its magic....I gotta stay open to that....and watch my view expand...the horizon is endless...loads of room for lovely changes...we are Not confined to Anyone's rules 🌞🌟🌞🌟🌞🌟🧡

    • @nia1425
      @nia1425 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Relatable! And then I feel what's wrong with me? And feel so down for days.

  • @interdimensionalsailboat
    @interdimensionalsailboat ปีที่แล้ว +5

    He said "mountain out of molehill" in the most asian way I can even imagine.
    Love this guy.

  • @memelord5366
    @memelord5366 ปีที่แล้ว +59

    I really needed this after being rejected today. Thank you 🙏

    • @madmarq
      @madmarq ปีที่แล้ว

      How is it going my man 🖤🕉️

  • @mortechrome
    @mortechrome ปีที่แล้ว +32

    My husband died very suddenly in april. I have come to see loneliness as a test of my endurance and an opportunity to define myself again after 27 years being so close to someone else. I cry and miss him every day but I chose to hope for a beautiful life despite everything.

    • @ongsk5527
      @ongsk5527 ปีที่แล้ว

      I u OK⁹hi 9th I u

    • @Velykadivchyna
      @Velykadivchyna ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hugging you ❤ You are always together in your hearts!

    • @Sh0n0
      @Sh0n0 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      How have you been holding up? Any tips for dealing with loneliness?

    • @MissLizaYangonMyanmar
      @MissLizaYangonMyanmar ปีที่แล้ว

      Reflect on that. Be grateful that you had all that. Some of us do not have anything at all. We can all practice gratitude. I am grateful I am strong to endure a life alone. Like that. Life is a constant journey of self improvement and becoming aware.

  • @naroescobosa9632
    @naroescobosa9632 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Hopefully Master Rinpoche ever reads this.... You have saved my life. Thank you for your teachings and sharing your wisdom to all of us!

    • @tenzin0314
      @tenzin0314 6 วันที่ผ่านมา

  • @daviddelarosa5188
    @daviddelarosa5188 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Thank u to the whole Buddhist community for all your support . Love all of u and wish u all peace and joy in your life’s . Buddhism has really helped me throughout my life .

  • @cctvmanbob
    @cctvmanbob ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I love to walk alone far away from people. However I am not alone !
    I sit by the running stream and listen to the water flow , think about how inportant water is.
    Then when the wind blows I feel the wind ,it's power !
    The smell of the grass or the land I am on. I think about the small animals I see when walking and think about how they fit in to the world !!
    Nature is wonderful ,all powerfull . Sometimes kind , sometimes not ..

  • @ARTygr-vt9ow
    @ARTygr-vt9ow ปีที่แล้ว +27

    I love my solitude and sometimes its a fight to have a chance to just be in my own company. My struggle is not actually loneliness but with approval. If I'm alone, I can't be disapproved and I am free to approve myself. But when I'm with people I have the chance to receive approval or disapproval and that often creates for me a lot of stress and a whole lot of disappointment. I realized that while watching this video so now I know what to work on. Thank you for the perspective!

    • @krymchanka_joy
      @krymchanka_joy ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Хорошо сказано 👍

  • @vibhujoshi6680
    @vibhujoshi6680 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    like ur smile in between.lots of regards

  • @omaroba1490
    @omaroba1490 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    WOW talk about perfect timing, i could use this talk right now, i was feeling very alone, but this helped alot.

  • @stuartv-e8161
    @stuartv-e8161 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Your teaching have, over time, changed me I. So many positive ways ... It's been incredible... So keep up the good work and I like forward to your next teachings. Bye Stuart 😊

  • @ikiwoelfin1905
    @ikiwoelfin1905 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    My heart bleeding, my body shaking and crying when I listen to this teaching. Feeling guilty as my mind creates this speechless isolation in loneliness, which I can fully feel that it is myself creating this type of life threatening reality. Full of shame that I am not able to reach out or connect. Not to a person. Not to a concept such as compassion, love, awareness, wisdom. This is only a word, written in books. Only a sound coming out of the computer speaker. Nothing that would be there for me to be felt or experienced. Traumatic breakdown, dissociation, disassembly of my very being, there is nobody left, no I, no Me, no part of my being that would be capable to feel anything or reach out to anybody or anything. Remembering previous breakdowns, after having reached out to people being rejected by those people who tell me I should please understand that my reactions are too much for them. Stunned. I should please not contact them any more. They send me a link to a YoutTube video and wish me well as they end the friendship. My reactions are too much for me as well. Overwhelmed. Suicidal thoughts, feeling close to those who took their lives, lonely...

  • @clayblaze1327
    @clayblaze1327 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    This has come just when it needed to, been struggling with a lot and this really helped, thank you 🙏

  • @reef6826
    @reef6826 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I have not had a friend since high school. I think most of my friends happened due to that forced socialisation, being at the back of the classroom same group of guys day in day out, bound to be at least one dude to get on with. But ever since working it’s not the same, sure you work with the same colleges every day, but it’s work, miserable and drab, people are really only their for the pay check, it’s less about making friend and more about just getting through the day. I do sometimes worry I may never have a friend again, I am friendly with people but just don’t have the time to form a real connection with another person. Doesn’t help I don’t drink, do drugs or use social media.. so in many ways that isolates me from my generation.

  • @baobinh186
    @baobinh186 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    thank you Rinpoche,

  • @rangerflaree
    @rangerflaree ปีที่แล้ว +1

    谢谢仁波切如此全面的分享,能在一周结束之前听到上师如此智慧的开示,让我现在就要做感恩的实践!

  • @jom.a.md.s.h.2206
    @jom.a.md.s.h.2206 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Namo Buddhaya, 🙏🙏🙏

  • @norbudolma1280
    @norbudolma1280 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Kyabsuche 🙏🙏🙏 Rinpoche chog❤️🙏

  • @keepsilence73
    @keepsilence73 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    💖at the best time for me🙏🙏🙏

  • @johnbulmer6012
    @johnbulmer6012 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you for this. Much of life is walking the path alone. Being alone and being lonely are different concepts. Enjoy the journey.

  • @forestyogin2218
    @forestyogin2218 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    When the primary nature is realized, "loneliness" is no longer experienced. It is dissolved and revealed to have never existed in the first place by experiencing the inseparability of all consciousness. Motivation to practice. .:)

  • @Rustyhound-Cartoons
    @Rustyhound-Cartoons ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I really relate to what u say about feeling connected to ur path. I pursue art as a career and that means being solitary for large periods of time where it's just me and the page I'm drawing on and the subject I draw. The skills I gain are with me for the remainder of my life wherever I go

    • @iloveFreedom.
      @iloveFreedom. ปีที่แล้ว

      I love drawing in groups, with music 😁🌈or yeah, alone in a big city, but then that illusion disappears and inner-sight kicks in, people come and chat if I'm open to that friendly connection💫 and also alone in peaceful places, so I can bring thAt into wherever I go, too, it's a fascinating journey, isn't it! 🎉I trust this generation feels free to express themselves freely, safely and in turn, tune into their own inner senses, and souls heritage, authentically, with no more conditioning or constraints, to create the inspiration we love to thrive on for future Joyfilled communities everywhere, rock on🎉🌈🎨

  • @bawatsering5185
    @bawatsering5185 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    ALL IS THINKING AGAIN WHAT YOU SAID AND RELATE.

  • @CH-zp1zv
    @CH-zp1zv 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I'm 21 years old i would like to say thank you to you master i can deal now my loneliness because i'm all alone because my father died and my brother have an own life and my mother was on the other guy.

  • @monikaliessem7361
    @monikaliessem7361 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    ❤️🤗Beautiful 🎉🎁🌻thank you dear Rinpoche and lovely greetings from Germany 🏵️🌼

  • @kshatriya9921
    @kshatriya9921 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you so much sir and thank you God for bringing me here, I have all that I need walk my path... God bless us all with his presence as our soul and may all of walk our path in love and harmony with the creator... 🙏🏽🌞

  • @Believer17_
    @Believer17_ 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    He is true 😊..amazing 😍...

  • @mariabejaranomonge2183
    @mariabejaranomonge2183 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you 🤗🙏🌷✨✨✨

  • @petergamma741
    @petergamma741 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Some people do not feel lonely, and retreat for the rest of their life, like the wholy brother Klaus in Switzerland, because the wholy teachings where his best friend.

  • @Yash-Gaikwad
    @Yash-Gaikwad ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Please put out more videos, more frequently on such topics.. thanks.

  • @teacherrobin3192
    @teacherrobin3192 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Learn that you connect outward to all things... then draw your real power in and to your brain and let it build. create your thoughts that make you smile. create the Quantum wave.

  • @williammargetts3980
    @williammargetts3980 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Have a great day my friend, this was another great piece of wisdom🌞

  • @iloveyellow7214
    @iloveyellow7214 ปีที่แล้ว

    Its amazing how much I can learn just with one of your videos. Please always be safe and healthy
    You do not know how much you have helped keep me sane since I found your chanell

  • @TERRANcmb
    @TERRANcmb ปีที่แล้ว

    Only your soul can give you the close connection you desire. No one else will see or feel exactly what you do. 🙂 compassion for you, friend.

  • @jccpsyc
    @jccpsyc ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Beautiful. Thank you very much Yongey Mingyur

  • @kamilkucharski3267
    @kamilkucharski3267 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you!

  • @Dil.Careem
    @Dil.Careem ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Hey Friends, I know that feeling lonely can be tough. But remember that you're never truly alone. Reach out to friends and family, or try joining a club or group that interests you. Volunteering or doing something kind for others can also help boost your mood and connect you with new people. Take time for self-care, too. Do things you enjoy and focus on your own well-being. You're a valuable and amazing person, and you deserve to feel loved and supported.

  • @luisa.790
    @luisa.790 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you! 🙏🏼❤️

  • @tenzinbhusang8263
    @tenzinbhusang8263 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    So great advice and thank you so much.

  • @tiagopratescowan3845
    @tiagopratescowan3845 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thankyou for the help

  • @1z1zmike
    @1z1zmike ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Good reminder. Thanks 🙂🙏

  • @tomascastillo886
    @tomascastillo886 ปีที่แล้ว

    thank you ❤

  • @amd5342
    @amd5342 ปีที่แล้ว

    This guy knows , bless you brother❤

  • @SkyhighStarlight
    @SkyhighStarlight 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank You.

  • @dallasdandigitalproduction393
    @dallasdandigitalproduction393 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you friend. I appreciate it. This video is very helpful. Namaste

  • @markclayton626
    @markclayton626 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great advice from a very pure mind 🙏

  • @dropclutch1
    @dropclutch1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you my friend I appreciate you. 🙏

  • @MarieLuce24
    @MarieLuce24 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It's very helpful, thank you Rinpoche.

  • @ommanipadmehum4975
    @ommanipadmehum4975 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The practice described by Yongey works « to appreciate something everyday, and to change the thing that is appreciated everyday »
    I have no doubt about it for you working too.
    You have a big heart and a great mind !

  • @nerfdrago123
    @nerfdrago123 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you for this Guruji. I was going through exactly what you explained, your guidance means a lot.

  • @growwithserene
    @growwithserene ปีที่แล้ว

    Love , compassion, wisdom, awareness❤

  • @katherinewolfe
    @katherinewolfe ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you, Rinpoche, appreciation and gratitude help me a lot but of course sometimes I forget. Your reminder was very timely today though I feel depressed rather than lonely. I think this will help both though.

  • @rumanaahmed5390
    @rumanaahmed5390 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love.

  • @akashgautam1909
    @akashgautam1909 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Loneliness is not what we tend to think it is. Instead, it is much deeper than that. What is loneliness, then?
    Are we lonely? Or are we ourselves the loneliness? Is loneliness different from what we really are, consciousness/awareness?
    Now from surface level, what we usually call loneliness is our mind is scared of losing its existence; that's why it always wants to be occupied by one thing or the other. If it doesn't happen, it gets scared and craves for it, causing loneliness.

  • @SanjayKumar-zm3hz
    @SanjayKumar-zm3hz ปีที่แล้ว

    Rested sir, love is a maditiion..

  • @explorer.samrat
    @explorer.samrat ปีที่แล้ว

    Being alone is a superpower

  • @matiseleite116
    @matiseleite116 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Sadhu sadhu sadhu

  • @PS-xb9hc
    @PS-xb9hc 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I think to combat loneliness we have to love ourselves very much, pamper ourselves and embrace and accept every part deeply. Only then u can heal.

  • @mukhtarovagd
    @mukhtarovagd ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you, Guru.
    As a grown kid with an attachment trauma I struggle a lot with a sense of loneliness and get caught into “zoomed in” state very often. Reminder that it is just a mind play helps not to surrender to this feeling completely

  • @irenabe973
    @irenabe973 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Is it my love and compassion that's my best friend? Or is it the Love and Compassion of the All? 🧡

  • @mrkang1154
    @mrkang1154 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    As what i experience, a person in regular daily meditation he/she no chance to feel loneliness.

  • @gurudra
    @gurudra ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Aloneness is beautiful. Loneliness is negative. Aloneness is peaceful. Loneliness is misery. There is a difference between aloneness and loneliness🙏

    • @vishalnirwan7
      @vishalnirwan7 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      In long run, Aloneless becomes LONELINESS...

    • @nowornever07
      @nowornever07 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@vishalnirwan7 n if yu can't be alone, den yu r bound to react instead of act

  • @saralamuni
    @saralamuni ปีที่แล้ว +4

    You are never alone because you are always there.

  • @tongkwanwing1250
    @tongkwanwing1250 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Doing something alone is different from loneliness. Loneliness is really the feeling that there is nobody you can connect to. Nobody understands you, so you are truly alone.

  • @christonylau
    @christonylau ปีที่แล้ว

    Loneliness is in need of company. Solitary is being at ease with oneself.

  • @ClassicalMartin
    @ClassicalMartin ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Dear Rinpoche, can you please give advice on how to deal with deep invalidation? Tashi Delek !!!

  • @kyesickhead7008
    @kyesickhead7008 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    700th like, yay 👌

  • @gloomy6379
    @gloomy6379 ปีที่แล้ว

    People should learn the difference between solitude being alone and loneliness those are 2 different things one is good one is bad

  • @jamesheinz6325
    @jamesheinz6325 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    🙏🙏🙏

  • @Gitte585
    @Gitte585 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    🙏

  • @vanshikathakur
    @vanshikathakur ปีที่แล้ว +1

    ♥️

  • @freeworld88888
    @freeworld88888 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    we come alone and we leave alone. try to learn to be mature, face it , accept it , it is normal. I see monks and nuns in china , they are all alone and they are the happiness people. I got many people around but i feel not connected, feel alone.. so just meditate .. and see thing as it is. if you are feel lonely, just use the mantra such as loneline, loneline, loneline.. keep repeat this or recite this word.. it will goes away.. feeling alone is just a feel or a mind object.. it is an illusion, it is temporary, so no need to attach to it. thanks for sharing.

  • @johnb8854
    @johnb8854 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    *Loneliness Only exists, when one is NOT Self-Aware, of "LIFE The Real Self" !*
    *"LIFE The Real Self", is NOT the human body, nor even the human entity...*

  • @expendablewater7474
    @expendablewater7474 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Honestly i wouldn't give my solitude for anything it's Soo peaceful and blissful. 🙂

    • @expendablewater7474
      @expendablewater7474 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Solace Creat you can by pass a lot of it with technology now listening to podcasts for example. Don't You think? I think it is possible and i legitimately believe i have developed genetic mutations or brain changes that let me deal with solutide different from someone born before me. Due to my use of technology i am physically alone but i don't feel alone. I think new research needs to be done with how technology affects the brain. Especially the developing brain. A new type of human is being created.

    • @expendablewater7474
      @expendablewater7474 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Solace Creat the internet is kind of like a mycelium Network and we are all connected we are never alone and it's going to give fruit. The transcendental object at the end of time is close.

  • @zamicczsmicc7464
    @zamicczsmicc7464 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I feel bored today that's why I'm lonely and I stumble to this video

  • @jeffreyng1254
    @jeffreyng1254 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Hi master, may I know how to get to meet up with you? I’m diagnosed with early stage Parkinson’s. Sometimes I met up with people saying that it’s not Parkinson’s. It’s about my past and able to cure. I’m very confused. How can I get your advice from you personally?

  • @EstebanSanbora
    @EstebanSanbora ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I walk alone in the company of many

  • @eSKAone-
    @eSKAone- ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Every so called "scientist" that does not see that the universe is a living thing is just a mechanic. His mind can only process the obvious parts of life before his eyes.
    Everything is alive. Life does not end at the other side of a cell's membrane. A city is an organism too. There is no isolated system in the universe. It's systems within systems, overlapping each other.
    God is life itself. Everything in life is connected. We are part of a greater being. Religions are just different languages, they are an attempt to communicate this insight to other humans. With science getting more and more of the picture (macrocosm, microcosm), and people getting educated about it, it will be easier and easier for everyone to understand it.
    For that:☮️, you have to see this:☯️.

  • @bhutikipa3248
    @bhutikipa3248 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    🌹🌹🌹🙏🙏🙏💐💐💐

  • @tayliang8812
    @tayliang8812 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    ❤❤❤❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

  • @interdimensionalsailboat
    @interdimensionalsailboat ปีที่แล้ว +1

    May be bold of me to say this but I don't think he understands what is usually meant by loneliness.
    I can feel lonely even when around people. It can be a sense of being cut off, not belonging, or feelings of lovelessness.
    Often i feel more lonely when I'm around people because of some fundamental differences that lead to communication or acceptance problems.
    Although I love being alone, it can make me feel pretty bad if i do it for too long or if i have nobody to share things with when there is stuff worth sharing.
    Also personally, I have let go of the past, that doesn't necessarily mean reinstating more connection with my family.

    • @interdimensionalsailboat
      @interdimensionalsailboat ปีที่แล้ว +1

      But I am definitely going to give that appreciation exercise a shot.

  • @simrankaur-sk8ks
    @simrankaur-sk8ks ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Now I m alone after my mother's death. Very upset

  • @patriciarosetimmers7730
    @patriciarosetimmers7730 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    1sam

  • @jamisedenari2449
    @jamisedenari2449 ปีที่แล้ว

    Rinpoche what if we are lonely and have no one but ourselves? What do we do when we have no one but ourselves to keep us company?

  • @buddhaneosiddhananda8499
    @buddhaneosiddhananda8499 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The monkey mind is not the trouble... don't avoid thinking... become more aware... the monkey mind is a higher level of awareness...

  • @Didgeridoo-Hippie.
    @Didgeridoo-Hippie. ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Beter a lone wolf than a follower of the herd.

  • @therealme613
    @therealme613 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    When you realize that this whole experience is all You yes I understand. I wonder if you really really do know what I mean??✌️💖&💡

  • @stuartv-e8161
    @stuartv-e8161 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Your teaching have, over time, changed me I. So many positive ways ... It's been incredible... So keep up the good work and I like forward to your next teachings. Bye Stuart 😊

  • @rumanaahmed896
    @rumanaahmed896 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Love.

  • @jessesoto6150
    @jessesoto6150 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    🙏🙏🙏

  • @paola-t
    @paola-t ปีที่แล้ว +1

  • @rumanaahmed896
    @rumanaahmed896 29 วันที่ผ่านมา

  • @sanjaylama3209
    @sanjaylama3209 ปีที่แล้ว

    🙏🙏🙏