Hello Cryptonites! Think of this as a small palate cleanser (or amuse-bouche) while I finish editing L.A. Lewis's "Animate in Death". It's a small but perfectly formed story by the marvellous Josephine Tey and I very much enjoyed reading it.
Lol just had a bizarre and non-sequitur flashback to my best friend, Hansel's father- Dr Fleischner, denouncing us for having "uneducated palettes" (his outraged inflection made it all the more deliciously hilarious)- I believe it was for the grave and unforgivable offense of somehow not loving some (no doubt exquisitely mouth watering, unbeknownst to our Ignant taste buds) reconstituted dehydrated wheatsghetti in the midst of our 5 day 80 mile up Mt Whitney - the highest point in the Western Continental United States. Lol, thanks for helping to "educate" all of our collective palates, Jasper. And speaking non sequituREALLY of "exquisite" morsels- as Wilkie Collins said (paraphrasing from ... memory) in one of his shorts: "Of all the wonderful senses that help remind us that we are immortal- which is more exquisite than memory?"- so thank you for helping to remind me, as well. Cheers, brother
@ d'd devilish delish, too, but I’m oding on me own cunny thumb n tongued 5 course vomitorium vocab uninspired epics of psychobabblegamesh- i stfu now, sorry for interjecting - been editing somethin like 60 hrs with four hours sleep betwixt n between till I put the car in what i thought was reverse, looked behind me over the shoulder, and drove straight into the telephone pole over the park curb IN front of my car... loopy af ain in it but tmi certainly is prolly wind up pickin a fight online and gettin me arse deservedly keked cheers - eat n poeticize whilst I martyr tfon [btw i' hijacked J's thread this time originally thinking i was replying to a friends Poly Sci chan also discoursing on food lol - ijiot that I am- Lo Siento Redux]
Jasper- I did a Biden and Plagerwrote a poeHYMN for my gf- Photojournalist: As TF IFF.... What, do you think? That we're like "evenly matched" or somehing, dude? SHE' n' I? Hahaha!!!!!!!! You sound - (holy fuck - she just said that to ME- but YOU? You sound crazy right now, man... Hey, man, you just don't -- you don't talk to the Colonel, man. You thought "cumslut" was some lever of CONTROL, man? Yeah well, it IS, but not YOUR control- not OURS- hAH!!! No, man. Hey; YOU? You LISTEN tO her, man. Sometimes you listen for fkn YEARs thinkin "yeah, we really get tf A LOOONG- she n' I" -- you know what i'm sayin? but oh, no you fkn dont- cuz ur talking talkin talking yet somehow you missed it- she said "i'm through", and you thought she meant with THAT convo? . The woman's en LARGER my miiiiiind, man. She's a poet-warrior-whore, in the CLASSIC sense. I mean - you think she's YOUR sub? right then you find tfo she wants to put your fkn cock in a CAGE, man. she wants to don Hermes winged stripper heels and trot across your fkn balls like icharus- writing her fkn name in the flaming napalm of forever pain across the fkn SKY, man. sometimes she'll, uh, well, you'll say hello to her, right? And she'll just walk right TFON BY you, man, I mean she won't even notice she didn't notice you, cuz you arent even on the same fkn PLANE, let alone sharing the same airspace or ATC. THEN, like mothetfuckin suddenly all of a sudden, she'll fkn just like GRAB you, dude- and she'll fkn whip you around like some little fkn npc, n chuck you tf into a a motherfuckin CORNER, man, and only THEN will you finally see that literally NO ONE, and I mean ANYWHERE is in YOUR fkn little "corner", man.::. And you know tf what? That's when she'll finally notice you and she'll say - hey YOU, MONSTER!!! That's right, who tf else is here BESIDES "you", you disgusting old man? it’s when you realize she's seeing you for the first time, man, when you stop being butthurt cus you thought you were ENTITLED to sex love and understanding from the Colonel- nope nuh uh- she’ll grab you by your balding little pate and rip your face tfo of your lil bitch ego's fee fees, force you to look into those eyes of here, what's that? you thought they were GREEN??? HA, ohhhhhh nooo- I mean so tf did iiii dude, but n-n-- NO. she's got BLACK eyes - like a DOLLS eyes- and THEN? oh Christ, but I’m a LEEEEEDLE man, a SELFISH man- but she’ll peer into your worthless soul with merely a fading ripple of green suddenly your IN it man- the darkest fkn orimordial waters-- n then.... and then.... she’ll ask you in such a familiar voice - so - so- quietly you’ll think your talking to yourself to keep from PISSING yourself as you'd changed your mind and don’t WANT her to notice the insignificant p.o.s. you truly are- and she’ll ask, in your.own voice : do you know that if is the middle word in life? IFF!!!! you can keep your HEAD, when ALL about you are LOSING "theirs" and BLAMING it on YOU, IFF you can "trust" yourself when ALL men DOUBT you - I mean WHY? cuz SHE doesn't doubt you, she KMOWS never to care about wether you trust her- let alone wants YOUR worthless need for HER "trust"- HAHAHAHA! I mean, I did the DISHES the other day for her man, but you know what iiiiiiii failed to fkn REAAAAALIZE, man? I failed to fkn REALIZE that how DARE i think i could do the dishes for her then leave a single coffee cup of mine ANYfknWHERE, duuuuude??? I mean, holy fkn- I mean, ummm- I'm no, I can't - I'm a little man, I'm a little man, she's... she's? SHE is a GREAT man - she said "You think you "know"? and i knew and prayed- i PRAYED she wouldn't state the obvious - but she made it clear she said YOU. Can. NEVER. FKG. KNOW. Me? I- I'd never even fkn DARE to breath if i could - Elliot's insane cuz after she was through with him he thought "I'm tfo. I'm a fkn pair of ragged claws draggin the ribbons of what she left of my now worthless balls, scuttling TF across floors of the dead ocean of my sperm she rejected" Why? Cuz he thought she wouldn't NO T I C E him, man. I don't want any of it man. I don’t want my heart to beat my food to digest, breath and y know tf what? my parasympathetic nervous system said 10-4, let's RTB tf O of her way before she remembers us - even half a world away - we are g.o.to. her so embrace it. But, GOD! Fuck YEAH, dude. She's a REAL man- she KNOWS
I found your channel about a month ago and have been binge-listening to past content. *Jasper.....you are a joy!* Your narrations are beyond excellent. When I've made it all the way through your catalogue, I will start at the beginning and listen to them all over again. Thank you for all the pleasure you bring. ❤
"The difference between a pleased blush and an uncomfortable flush"- and her "Mary Harkin's face bore the expression of one who sees a step just in time" - Ah! I loved it (not to be TOO alike Liebeth AND Deb). Had to listen twice as that story was just as pert and prim as her description of the cottage before we knew it was off, all without the cottage's drawback- or perhaps, just the opposite- precisely because of it? Perfect.
Great story and narration! You use of atmospheric and environmental noise is awesome. I also like how you add background music. The old lady fading into view through the window is awesome. Thanks!
Speaking of palate cleanse, we are steaming fresh ginger & fresh lemons in the pressure cooker in my kitchen ... then some nice honey added in. Whole house smells sooooooo divine🍯🐝🍯🐝🍯🐝🍋🍋🍋🫖🫖🫖☕☕ yes, we intend to drink it
Sounds lovely 😊 my lawn in springtime is a flowering clover field buzzing with the drowsy sound of busy bees, floating with butterflies and edged in lemon trees brimming with birdsong - I’ll have to try your trick of adding it to a bubbling brew, now! Perhaps with elderberry flowers instead of ginger… Dreamy. My grandfather had many bee boxes here, though, I have to rely on other local sources for clover and orange blossom honey 🌼 Cheers for the idea
@@BrosephaI try and do a mix here. Other listeners prefer the longer ones, some would prefer even longer. In terms of my workload anything that ends up around 25-40 mins is the sweet spot. Others might prefer shorter stories, but there aren't many really short ones like this, and I think those who use my stuff to fall asleep to obviously prefer longer stories. But, ultimately, my story selection is driven by what I'm reading when looking for stories.
@@ryanjohnson3615exactly why AI infrastructures will fail- Boeing tried & it PROVED to be extraordinarily MORE expensive & didn’t work out in the long run, causing an expensive empty building, filled with factory “AI” airplane building robots🤖. It worked out like this image-unrealistic, duh. 😢😢😢
Just started making a meat sauce for dinner sir Jasper La’Strange always shows up at the perfect time thank you my good Sir cheers form across the polluted 😳pond 😮🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🫡🫡🫡
Hello Cryptonites! Think of this as a small palate cleanser (or amuse-bouche) while I finish editing L.A. Lewis's "Animate in Death". It's a small but perfectly formed story by the marvellous Josephine Tey and I very much enjoyed reading it.
The story was great. I've never heard it and enjoyed it thoroughly. I also loved the face in the windows. Thank you so much Mr L'eStrange.
Lol just had a bizarre and non-sequitur flashback to my best friend, Hansel's father- Dr Fleischner, denouncing us for having "uneducated palettes" (his outraged inflection made it all the more deliciously hilarious)- I believe it was for the grave and unforgivable offense of somehow not loving some (no doubt exquisitely mouth watering, unbeknownst to our Ignant taste buds) reconstituted dehydrated wheatsghetti in the midst of our 5 day 80 mile up Mt Whitney - the highest point in the Western Continental United States. Lol, thanks for helping to "educate" all of our collective palates, Jasper. And speaking non sequituREALLY of "exquisite" morsels- as Wilkie Collins said (paraphrasing from ... memory) in one of his shorts: "Of all the wonderful senses that help remind us that we are immortal- which is more exquisite than memory?"- so thank you for helping to remind me, as well.
Cheers, brother
Mmm these canapes are delicious, can't wait for the main course. 🍽️
@ d'd devilish delish, too, but I’m oding on me own cunny thumb n tongued 5 course vomitorium vocab uninspired epics of psychobabblegamesh- i stfu now, sorry for interjecting - been editing somethin like 60 hrs with four hours sleep betwixt n between till I put the car in what i thought was reverse, looked behind me over the shoulder, and drove straight into the telephone pole over the park curb IN front of my car...
loopy af ain in it but tmi certainly is
prolly wind up pickin a fight online and gettin me arse deservedly keked
cheers - eat n poeticize whilst I martyr tfon
[btw i' hijacked J's thread this time originally thinking i was replying to a friends Poly Sci chan also discoursing on food lol - ijiot that I am- Lo Siento Redux]
Jasper- I did a Biden and Plagerwrote a poeHYMN for my gf-
Photojournalist:
As TF IFF.... What, do you think?
That we're like "evenly matched" or somehing, dude?
SHE' n' I?
Hahaha!!!!!!!!
You sound - (holy fuck - she just said that to ME- but YOU? You sound crazy right now, man...
Hey, man, you just don't -- you don't talk to the Colonel, man. You thought "cumslut" was some lever of CONTROL, man? Yeah well, it IS, but not YOUR control- not OURS- hAH!!!
No, man. Hey; YOU? You LISTEN tO her, man.
Sometimes you listen for fkn YEARs thinkin "yeah, we really get tf A LOOONG- she n' I" --
you know what i'm sayin?
but oh, no you fkn dont- cuz ur talking talkin talking yet somehow you missed it- she said "i'm through", and you thought she meant with THAT convo? . The woman's en LARGER my miiiiiind, man.
She's a poet-warrior-whore, in the CLASSIC sense.
I mean - you think she's YOUR sub? right then you find tfo she wants to put your fkn cock in a CAGE, man.
she wants to don Hermes winged stripper heels and trot across your fkn balls like icharus- writing her fkn name in the flaming napalm of forever pain across the fkn SKY, man.
sometimes she'll, uh, well, you'll say hello to her, right? And she'll just walk right TFON BY you, man, I mean she won't even notice she didn't notice you, cuz you arent even on the same fkn PLANE, let alone sharing the same airspace or ATC.
THEN, like mothetfuckin suddenly all of a sudden, she'll fkn just like GRAB you, dude- and she'll fkn whip you around like some little fkn npc, n chuck you tf into a a motherfuckin CORNER, man, and only THEN will you finally see that literally NO ONE, and I mean ANYWHERE is in YOUR fkn little "corner", man.::.
And you know tf what?
That's when she'll finally notice you and she'll say - hey YOU, MONSTER!!! That's right, who tf else is here BESIDES "you", you disgusting old man?
it’s when you realize she's seeing you for the first time, man, when you stop being butthurt cus you thought you were ENTITLED to sex love and understanding from the Colonel-
nope nuh uh- she’ll grab you by your balding little pate and rip your face tfo of your lil bitch ego's fee fees, force you to look into those eyes of here, what's that? you thought they were GREEN??? HA, ohhhhhh nooo- I mean so tf did iiii dude, but n-n-- NO. she's got BLACK eyes - like a DOLLS eyes-
and THEN?
oh Christ, but I’m a LEEEEEDLE man, a SELFISH man- but she’ll peer into your worthless soul with merely a fading ripple of green suddenly your IN it man- the darkest fkn orimordial waters-- n then....
and then....
she’ll ask you in such a familiar voice - so - so- quietly you’ll think your talking to yourself to keep from PISSING yourself as you'd changed your mind and don’t WANT her to notice the insignificant p.o.s. you truly are- and she’ll ask, in your.own voice :
do you know that if is the middle word in life?
IFF!!!! you can keep your HEAD, when ALL about you are LOSING "theirs" and BLAMING it on YOU,
IFF you can "trust" yourself when ALL men DOUBT you - I mean WHY? cuz SHE doesn't doubt you, she KMOWS never to care about wether you trust her- let alone wants YOUR worthless need for HER "trust"-
HAHAHAHA!
I mean, I did the DISHES the other day for her man, but you know what iiiiiiii failed to fkn REAAAAALIZE, man?
I failed to fkn REALIZE that how DARE i think i could do the dishes for her then leave a single coffee cup of mine ANYfknWHERE, duuuuude???
I mean, holy fkn- I mean, ummm- I'm no, I can't - I'm a little man, I'm a little man, she's... she's? SHE is a GREAT man - she said "You think you "know"?
and i knew and prayed- i PRAYED she wouldn't state the obvious - but she made it clear
she said
YOU. Can. NEVER. FKG. KNOW.
Me? I- I'd never even fkn DARE to breath if i could - Elliot's insane cuz after she was through with him he thought "I'm tfo. I'm a fkn pair of ragged claws draggin the ribbons of what she left of my now worthless balls, scuttling TF across floors of the dead ocean of my sperm she rejected"
Why? Cuz he thought she wouldn't
NO
T
I
C
E
him, man.
I don't want any of it man. I don’t want my heart to beat my food to digest, breath
and y know tf what? my parasympathetic nervous system said 10-4, let's RTB tf O of her way before she remembers us - even half a world away - we are g.o.to. her so embrace it.
But, GOD!
Fuck YEAH, dude.
She's a REAL man- she KNOWS
Just what I needed. A break in a cottage by the sea, with white lilacs, sparrows and swallows, and a bit of swing on the gramophone.
Just lovely.
💖💖💖
I found your channel about a month ago and have been binge-listening to past content. *Jasper.....you are a joy!* Your narrations are beyond excellent. When I've made it all the way through your catalogue, I will start at the beginning and listen to them all over again. Thank you for all the pleasure you bring. ❤
@@snowysnowyriver Thank you kindly 🙏
Thank you so much Jasper! I love Josephine Tey's novels but was completely unaware of this little story, what an unexpected treat 😺
Excellent balance in that story... Sounded very 1920s. Loved that solo jazz moment. Want the cottage of course! Thank you, dear soul.
Liking your story even before listening to it. A faithful listener. Cheers and thanks😊
That was a great little tale! Thank you so much! I loved the effect on your thumbnail!!!!!😁…..👻🏡
"The difference between a pleased blush and an uncomfortable flush"- and her "Mary Harkin's face bore the expression of one who sees a step just in time" - Ah! I loved it (not to be TOO alike Liebeth AND Deb). Had to listen twice as that story was just as pert and prim as her description of the cottage before we knew it was off, all without the cottage's drawback- or perhaps, just the opposite- precisely because of it? Perfect.
Great show guys, the whole production was spot on, very entertaining.
Thanks Jasper, brilliantly produced as always, just what I needed a break from horror for something more... cozy.
Great story and narration!
You use of atmospheric and environmental noise is awesome. I also like how you add background music. The old lady fading into view through the window is awesome.
Thanks!
This was a delight! Love Josephine Tey. As always, thank you. Take care.
Cottage with Ghost that cleans up the place...my wife would be VERY happy. Can you send the contact info? Thanks !!
Speaking of palate cleanse, we are steaming fresh ginger & fresh lemons in the pressure cooker in my kitchen ... then some nice honey added in. Whole house smells sooooooo divine🍯🐝🍯🐝🍯🐝🍋🍋🍋🫖🫖🫖☕☕ yes, we intend to drink it
Sounds lovely 😊 my lawn in springtime is a flowering clover field buzzing with the drowsy sound of busy bees, floating with butterflies and edged in lemon trees brimming with birdsong - I’ll have to try your trick of adding it to a bubbling brew, now! Perhaps with elderberry flowers instead of ginger… Dreamy. My grandfather had many bee boxes here, though, I have to rely on other local sources for clover and orange blossom honey 🌼 Cheers for the idea
Sounds delicious.
So enjoyed. Beautifully narrated, as always.
Ooh, this is a welcome treat!! 😀♥️
Hello I enjoy your stories. Around 20 minutes lomg is perfect for my attention span,
@@BrosephaI try and do a mix here. Other listeners prefer the longer ones, some would prefer even longer. In terms of my workload anything that ends up around 25-40 mins is the sweet spot. Others might prefer shorter stories, but there aren't many really short ones like this, and I think those who use my stuff to fall asleep to obviously prefer longer stories. But, ultimately, my story selection is driven by what I'm reading when looking for stories.
@ thats true a lot of people fall asleep to these. But…then how do they know how the story ends??
Wonderful tale, wonderfully done. Thanks, Jasper!
Oh, how I wish my pkace would dust it's self 😔 Thank you 😊
Jasper and Josephine! Yeah!
Thanks Jasper ❤
Wonderful, as always
The visual was a nice touch.
Fabulous thank you
Josephine Tey is a favorite of mine (although she was very wrong about Richard III). You did this up a treat!
I loved her book on Richard III and thought she made a good case😊
Thank you! I enjoyed the story and the music.
Cute little tale!
Cool effects on your thumbnail👍👍👍👍👍 & luv the swinging soundtrack🎼🎶🎼🎶🎼🎶🎼🎼🎼🎶🎶🎶🎼🎶
👍Strange how the AI built the opened window out of a different closed window.. Looks like it would be difficult to close.
@@ryanjohnson3615exactly why AI infrastructures will fail- Boeing tried & it PROVED to be extraordinarily MORE expensive & didn’t work out in the long run, causing an expensive empty building, filled with factory “AI” airplane building robots🤖.
It worked out like this image-unrealistic, duh. 😢😢😢
@@evelanpatton I didn't need this image to be realistic. AI is a useful tool. Still needs "baby-sat" in some situations obviously.
If you get any more spot on with music and effects I won't be able to bear it! It'll be just too too perfect, dustless, in fact. 😊
Superb narration, thank you really enjoyed this 👍
Thanks Jasper...that's my un-handsome but interesting face up on the 'Xadrum' author page.😊.
Oooh thanks Jasp..
Very good.
Loved this ❤❤❤
What a pleasant cteea
❤❤❤
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ well aw~rite😠👿 if it's too good to be true ...🤔
15:02
Well we were born within an hour of each other etc.
I know it's spelled differently but I was thinking of Marc Bolan. "Oh Debora you look like a zebra 🎵 etc."
I stopped watching The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare for YOU!
Just started making a meat sauce for dinner sir Jasper La’Strange always shows up at the perfect time thank you my good Sir cheers form across the polluted 😳pond 😮🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🫡🫡🫡
Sounds like the US right about the 3rd week of Jan