Or maybe you can not call unintentional mistakes “micro aggressions” which makes all the people involved walk on egg shells. A faux pas would be a better word to differentiate intentionality, but micro aggressions just breeds sensitive people and scared people. Words aren’t violence. People make mistakes. Correct them *properly* and move on with your life.
Life has become too easy. We have all the conviences of the modern world, and living is easy. Food is easy to access, youve never hunted an animal or grown a crop to feed yourself. Modern medicine has elimated hundreds if not thousands of ways we used to die from parasites to infections to severe bodily trauma. We have access to almost the entire human race's collective knowledge literally in our pockets, cellphones and computers. We can get into a car or a bus or a plane or a train and travel across land in hours what would have taken us weeks or months before. The point is that now people dont have to worry about real threats like we used to. We used to die from everything. But now, we have so much spare time and we arent feeling threats from every direction anymore, people have to come up with new ways to feel threatened and in danger. Im sorry but life used to be alot harder so we understood what real stress was, what real threats were, what true aggression actually meant. If the only thing youre worried about is how offended you are that someone said something was ghetto, then you obviously are doing well in life because you dont have any bigger issue in your life other than youre offended.
I have OCD and I've heard people make that OCD comment at the beginning and I just take it for what it's worth. I don't find it offensive it never occurred to me to find a offensive because I take it in the spirit that it was meant
Also applies to ADHD, which i have but i understand what people who dont have it say there so ADHD or ADD, i dont get offended because i can realize that it causes more trouble for me to get offended at something that doesnt affect me.
That's why they are telling you so you can be offended. Instead of fixing things in your life that you would like to work on or need to work on blame someone else. It helps take the responsibility off of you.
Also for me with ptsd. People tend to use extreme terms to describe that they feel strongly about something. I know that no one is making fun of ptsd or saying they even have it just because they say they got ptsd from their test or something. There’s no harm done and it shouldn’t be taken too seriously
2:17 as someone with diagnosed OCD, I've never found that comment aggressive. I've always been annoyed by it, yes. Is it ignorance? Absolutely! Is it an attack? No. But I can only speak for myself
Someone once wrote to a comedian who had made a joke about bipolar disorder and said that he found it terribly offensive and asked him to never make the same joke again. The following week he wrote in again and said he loved it.
@@awllypollyas8292 I've been diagnosed with OCD, and I've never even though to be offended by someone saying "I'm totally OCD about X". This is training people into looking at the world with a sick mindset, trying to find disrespect everywhere.
@@awllypollyas8292 We got in this situation because in first world societies like ours people who don't have to worry about things like war and famine instead create things to victimize themselves.
@@Dennis-nc3vwwe heard you the first time. You don’t have to announce that you have OCD and don’t care if someone is saying “I’m so OCD” in every comment Lmfaoo. You’re not everyone. Some ppl are upset when ppl say that, grow up
@@tp4ever718umm, stop being ableist- she has OCD and thus by the very nature of their affliction cannot help but to comment each time. For someone who seems to think micro-aggressions are not okay, you are not only quick to dismiss this person’s struggles with their disorder , but openly mock their disability
She mentions microaggressions directed at older people but in my experience, microaggressions directed at younger people, especially in the workplace, are just as prevalent.
This is what happens when everyone gets a participation trophy. You're special. You're the best. If things don't go your way it can't be because of you, it must be someone else's fault. I had to earn my trophies. You know how much time I spend caring about what people think about me? Zero.
Aren’t microagressions a thing of the “west”? I live in India and I feel like everyone is microagressing everyone all the time and no one seem to mind.
That’s because people in the West are becoming hyper sensitive snowflakes . It’s beyond the point of absurdity at this point and I’m a person that grew up a bit sensitive. I got over it by doing the exact opposite of what this lady advises
Yup, luckily we all have the same standards on where these 'personal boundaried' start and end, etiquette is universal over history, class and cultures, and we never have the interest to get personal to people we don't really don't know yet...
Microagressions are a slight of hand that those with a victim mentality use to silence and control others. I say stop blaming everyone and everything for how you feel. I say become empowered through knowledge of self and by building self-esteem. I say take ownership of your inner dialogue and feelings. Because once you've accepted responsibility for these things, nothing can hurt you..
Dang. That is a micro aggression towards people with victim mentality, people that blame others, people that silence others, people that control others, people that feel, people that do not empower themselves, people that do not seek knowledge of self, people that do not build self esteem, people that do not take ownership of their own inner dialogue, people that do not take ownership of their feelings, people that do not accept responsibility, people that get hurt and people that define words as micro aggressions.
Dear Alfred, and anyone who agrees with him, I am genuinely concerned with this line of reasoning. It's important to remember the context: we are discussing an individual's experience, which no one else can decide for them. Throughout this comment, but especially by calling their disrespect "sleight of hand", you're saying that it's an illusion - you are denying their right to feel disrespected. You are denying their life experience that has cultivated this insecurity, which they never chose, and obviously haven't been able to process yet. Telling them to get over it is obviously not going to help them overcome this difficulty, which they are obviously struggling with. Rather than to be thoughtful towards their difficulties (whether you believe these to be real or imagined is irrelevant - only to know that they are struggling is enough), you have chosen to be annoyed and dismissive. Not only does your rejection of their reality further distress them, but you also deny yourself the opportunity to learn how to understand and empathise with the difficulties of others. Social culture is built by what we teach ourselves and each other is appropriate behaviour, and language is the code by which we communicate that. Are you not interested in learning to be kinder to others? Or to communicate more effectively? If not, the culmination of your argument is for an individual's right to simply not care about others. Think on that. Why is that so important for you? Do you not want to experience the thoughtfulness of others? To feel that your world is welcoming? Understanding? To reflect your argument back to you: If you don't wish this for yourself or others, why should you have the right to live amongst others only to be careless and unkind?
@@harryturnbull963 nobody is reading your long post. A victim who is externally oriented will never overcome their self trapping mentality until they become internally oriented. What he said is correct, well known, and thoroughly established for the past 1 length of modern society
@@iamjohnrobot I am curious why you believe you are the ultimate authority. You've decided that no one has read my comment, nor agrees with me, both of which are false. In fact, I know you would agree. Consider the principle of reciprocity - this is not simply a moral position of what we wish done to others or ourselves, but rather a causal cycle: what we do to others teaches them how to treat us in return. If you don't care for the suffering of others, expect them to make you suffer. To be clear, I am discussing the lack of social thoughtfulness, which underlies all microaggressions, not the psychology of victimhood (which is an unfortunate state to experience, no one would deny it, being is this individual's responsibility to overcome - but others do not have the right to antagonise a victim like a pack of wild dogs). It's every individual's responsibility to learn the possible sensitivities of those around them, so that we may all better understand and care for each other - so that we may all be treated as we wish to be. The best way to break this cycle, to my knowledge, is for those with this capacity, to treat insensitive individuals with understanding for their lack of awareness, awakening them to the complex realities of others. Unfortunately, insensitive people will be met by reciprocal insensitivity, polarising the discourse and perpetuating the misunderstanding that it's purely about a "victimhood mentality".
@@harryturnbull963 too much to read. I just took the opportunity to disparage your long writing style with no breaks for readability, and obviously was exaggerating overall. First sentence, I don’t. I just believe that after listening to both sides of an argument, and applying logic, it is the duty of the other side to refute the logic. Explain to me how treating people the way you want to be treated doesn’t cover every single aspect of every single thing she says... Go ahead, and try to avoid a meandering treatise. I haven’t heard anyone explain this.
Surely the term microaggression is itself a "micro-aggression" in that it diminishes the (possibly justified) aggressive intent of the speaker? There needs to be an in-depth dialectic about this, possibly followed by an international conference of qualified womyn and other interested hupersuns. This also highlights the urgent need for law-reform. The time has come when every microaggression results in a micro-case, before a micro-jury, so that a micro-judge can pass a micro-sentence. That would be REAL justice.
Microaggressions is just over sensitive people protecting their fragile egos by wrapping themselves with an ideological blanket. People use to get over this through rough-play during childhood, but because people grew up being overindulged and coddled, they become sensitive little wimps that constantly need protection from words.
women offend me whenever they speak because i do not believe women deserve to be allowed to speak in public therefore anything a woman says is a microaggression to me
As someone diagnosed with OCD this video makes me 1000X more angry than anyone who's said "I'm totally OCD about X". Actually, if you took my offense and such comments and multiplied it by 1000, you'd get nothing because 0 X 1000 is still 0. These are sick people who are training others to see disrespect everywhere. Political Correctness operates through the power of suggestion. It's like the catty mean girl instigator friend who's single and jealous so she says "Why do you let him talk to you like that?" after a benign conversation with your boyfriend, planting the seed in your head you're being disrespected when it never would have crossed your mind otherwise.
Only in a society where people are too comfortable and don't have to worry about real issues would this topic even be discussed... We are destroying ourselves, it's like people are obsessed with being victims and they literally can't allow themselves to experience happiness because they have to find an issue with every nonconsequential part of their existence.
You were obviously raised well and there is hope for the future with people like you. You will be an influence for good. There is usually a good reason why parents name their daughter Charity (I hope that wasn't a miro-aggression).
@@Laurentdu59 hahaha oh no I've been microaggressed! How can I possibly go on? 😤 All jokes aside my mother had high hopes for me with this name, I haven't always lived up to it but I'm trying. I feel so lost in my generation.
@@charitybrook6279 the victim types just love to yell and scream their plight. They are winning in terms of changing society into this bizarre, actually thoughtless, toxic environment, but lots of people hate it and are hoping it burns itself out.
Your comment is dismissive and invalidating. When so many people from marginalized groups, whose lives and struggles you probably know little about are pointing out an issue, your response is "they're victimizing themselves"? And it is obviously a significant part of their existence because microaggressions are hurtful and implicit. They perpetuate stereotypes and uphold discriminatory structures in society. But I guess it would be convenient for someone they don't affect or benefit, to believe they don't exist.
@@ambrosehallward8212 I'm sorry you know nothing about me or my life... But your assumptions could be taken as microaggressions if I was a weaker person. Here's the deal, a lot of things that are assumed to be microaggressions are simply not. It puts people in a constant state of fear and anxiety around others, and leads to mental health problems and social instability. We all can get our feelings hurt, and there's nothing wrong with that. But what we do with it is up to us, and dwelling on these things is not helpful AT ALL. If you feel invalidated by my comment, then that's exactly my point. Isn't it exhausting to need to feel validated by everyone all of the time even strangers on the internet?? Be comfortable and confident in yourself and these things won't bother you so much. I won't bother you with the sob story of my life and injustices that have happened to me, because it's not relevant. I used to dwell on the past, and it kept me from creating a brighter future for myself. I'm in a much better place now, and I hope one day you'll get there too. By living in fear of microaggressions we are treating them as if they actually hold validity, which they don't. It's better to just forgive and move on. People are happier that way. By dwelling on such things we do indeed victimize ourselves.
In other words how can I transform myself into an npc where everything I say is throughly processed and filtered because everything I say can be perceived as offensive.
in other words, "i'd like to speak without thinking for the rest of my life, this video makes me feel uncertain and overwhelmed about how foolish I might sound or that I might hurt someone, and frankly I don't care about anybody else enough to be kind. You cannot make me pause and reflect. Back off, lady."
@@kyeflans It is not my job to read your mind and figure out every little detail on things you might find offensive. As long as I speak what I believe is true with a degree of politeness without intentionally insulting everyone, I don't believe I should censor myself. If you disagree, we can have a small conversation on why I'm wrong. In my opinion, people who complain about microaggressions are mentally fragile and need to grow a backbone. I'm more concerned about macroaggresions as in actual violence.
I know many people who have been victims of micro aggressions. They haven't recovered, and america isn't doing enough to support them. But worse yet, I have treated sufferers of nano aggressions. They all have the same symptoms, saying : " I was looking for something to blame for my problems and found; people who try make light of situations are the real oppressors." I even met a few atom aggressors. These people are dangerous. But not as dangerous as the (highly theoretical): quantum aggressive-folk.
I roll my eyes at this whole movement, the most recognizable companies in America have micro and not so micro aggression ingrained in their policies. In my job , I have no rights and no recourse to such things. It's deal with it or quit
You're so blind. This is a notion that will be used in cudgel-laws, laws with fines and prison terms attached, These people are working very hard at grabbing more and more power.
Whereas, the text summary says: "Microaggression is a term used for brief and commonplace daily verbal, behavioral, or environmental indignities, whether intentional or unintentional, that communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative prejudicial slights and insults toward any group. " UNFORTUNATELY, in the video, Tiffany Alvoid does NOT define it this way. To her, in her definition, it is ONLY when it is "towards a minority or marginalized group".. Wow.. How Horrible is that?? That is why, I dis-recommend this woman. If she had said "Especially for minority or marginalized group"; I'd have less of an issue. But, everybody deserves respect. Regardless of the "category" of person they are. Shame on Tiffany Alvoid Thank God, who ever wrote the actual summary, was respectful of ALL people. Not just PC favorites.
I have PTSD. I would not even think of being offended when people use it casually. I know exactly what they mean and they are in NO way trying to belittle people who have it. I can’t imagine what it would be like to have to go to a workplace where people are walking on eggshells and looking to be offended.
I mean basically everyone thinks that way. These people only say these things because they live in an ivory tower and don’t actually know anyone who has the conditions.
PTSD used to mean a man who had been to war and experienced the gravest horrors a human can experience. Now it means a university educated white woman received a compliment.
Thankfully, yes. She is giving facts about what, why, how and the so what and now what whether the microaggression is directed at you or someone else and you witness it or whether you are the person who speaks and acts in ways that are microaggessions. MOST people are not intentionally excluding and offensive to others. Yet, it happens. And it's increasing in a world and in nations where people are emboldened and hide (as citizens of the USA) behind the 1st Amendment of the Constitution of the USA, are disconnected from their intent and the impact of their words and deeds on others -- and especially people who tell the offended person they should get over it when they themselves cannot/do not "get over" the fact that someone gave the gift of educating them on how they are being offensive. I find it interesting that people are more and more often being offended because people who have been disrespected/marginalized regularly, historically and currently are finding their voices/standing in their power and telling them their behavior is inappropriate -- even when done so respectfully. And the comeback is real tears, often fake tears, anger and accusation -- it's your fault! If you weren't here (and you shouldn't be), I wouldn't have said it. Oh bring back the good ole' days when these _______s weren't here and only folk like me were. THAT is what this woman is addressing. If it disturbs you, rather than attacking her or shutting what she is saying down and out, I respectfully invite you to examine what your concern is, why you are disturbed and next respectful steps you can take to expand your awareness, knowledge and skill. Of course, I'm assuming you are one of the many who really wants to demonstrate respect for everyone.
I accidently pressed the thumbs up icon and now can't undo it, so I'm adding this comment. The information she shares in this Ted Talk is true, interesting, and relevant to everyone. In my opinion, comments such as yours underscores the truth of her message. It is concrete evidence that some people aren't even aware that what she is saying reflects reality.
Talks like this are always eye opening and create a greater awareness of comments that we unconsciously say with no ill intent, but may have that effect. Knowledge from these conversations are power, and that power can fuel the engine of change.
It’s a shame people in the comment section can’t deal with the fact that maybe they’re the problem and maybe people aren’t just being “overly sensitive”
Lol truly! I will always accept well-intentioned phrases. Someone sneezes, I say bless you! Whether you believe in God or not, accept the blessing. Same goes for holidays, if someone wishes me a Happy Hanukkah, thanks you too, and Merry Christmas as well! Doesn't matter if I celebrate one or the other or both. It's meant in a nice way, accept the well wishes and move on!
It's not kind and decent to train people to see disrespect everywhere. Political Correctness isn't teaching politeness, it's teaching people to see disrespect and take offense where they'd never think to otherwise. Just as you can train yourself to be paranoid or pessimistic, you can train yourself to be hair-triggered.
@@Dennis-nc3vw being anti-microaggression is not political correctness or something sjw lmao, some random virtue signaling white people on twitter made every single thing 'offensive', it's just that microaggressions are things that could/ could not be in good faith but are still kind of strange, as a person who has actually experienced microaggressions, the reaction isn't hate or anger or anything it's just like "um...... okay....?" kind of reaction. even if it isn't in bad faith it can still be perceived as weird or kind of offensive. sjws just misconstrued the whole thing and turned any question regarding anything "microaggressive", which in and of itself is a microaggression because it's taking something which is related to prejudice and a serious topic and appropriating it to something tiny and insignificant, like a question caused by curiosity and lacking malicious intent.
You eliminate this "micro aggression" by becomming stronger emotionally and thicker skinned instead of expecting others to be subservient to your own frailties and mispreceptions *you* fail to address
Just another example of those with no control over their emotions compensating by controlling the behaviours of others ...oh and throwing yet another barrier up against free speech.
Micro-agression definition will expand over time since people have lots of things that offend them and its not good because your teaching people to be overly sensitive to even the simplest things.
Could we all be more mindful of the speech we use? Probably. Is it anybody else's responsibility to build up your self-esteem and not allow your emotions to be dictated by the words of another? No. That's everybody's personal responsibility. ACTUAL aggression is a problem. Whatever happened to "sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me"? It shouldn't matter in the least what anybody says or thinks about you, and if you love and appreciate who you are at your core, it doesn't.
The problem is that words do actually hurt. Research shows that people who are bullied are more likely to experience depression, anxiety and may even commit suicide.
@@rueeeeeeeeee nah pretty sure that spending an enormous amount of societies resources and human thoughts on backtracking small pieces of conversation to give some people the social “right” to tell others how to speak is pretty pathetic. If not harmful and absolutely damaging the fabric of society. Nothing about micro aggression isn’t already included in traditional “be a good person” wisdom, so his comment was informative that she is saying stuff we all already know, and all already have the tools to deal with.
I was diagnosed with OCD and psychosis when i was 17, 11 years ago. Since then, i have heard countless people call themselves and others "psychos" and "OCD", i have never felt offended by that, not even annoyed by it. I guess maybe i have thicker skin. But that's just me.
Honestly, I think most people in the country are like you. It’s this incredibly vocal minority of thin-skinned toddlers who wine incessantly and demand capitulation
That is an ailment, it's not something that was placed upon you just because of the color you are or aren't. Deflect or negate if you want. That's nice that you were able to develop or have a tough skin in order to cope, nevertheless, it barely applies to scenario. Actually, it applies very much, my apology. People of color have developed so much tough skin from the NUMEROUS experiences they've had with this and OTHER issues that in one instance, never knowing, they just may POP. We need not downplay it
@@ThistleRealm i was referring to the part about OCD, but okay? Also, "ailments" are not voluntary either, just like race isn't voluntary. It sounded like you were pitting mental illness against racism, not sure why tho. Could it be that you feel ur personal suffering regarding race trumps others' struggle regarding mental illness? Seems like you're the one downplaying stuff.
Because even though you have OCD and psychosis, you are a person who chose to be a 'fighter' who wanted to conquer/overcome the problems associated with your conditions rather than being a victim wanting to swim in a pool of pity. Also you are a person who does not get offended by trivial things.
I loved that too, haha! Sad thing is, I used to believe that it did when I was growing up😭 I live in Spokane, WA, which is crazy white. It took me way too long to learn that treating someone with basic decency doesn’t make someone incredible.
This is a prime example of ideas that went too far. Telling people who believe that they were taught to treat everyone equal that they are guilty of micro-aggression by saying so is just bullying.
The fact we are even having this discussion is ridiculous. I am glad though that my sons will have less competition in the workplace in the future because half of these cry babies will be weeded out. 👍
It's like this in all aspects of life now, and it gets worse and worse as the generations go on. Even in sports... kid does terrible, but he's still being told "good job." Why? Small things like that are the reason we have overly sensitive people now.
in other words, when you take issue with somebody for a plethora of subjective reasons but can't actually articulate what's egregious about what that person said or did.
this video gave me a new perspective i didn’t know that self-depricating humor based on attaching some health condition you don’t have could be offensive it makes sense to me now, because the person saying it doesn’t know how it is to live with that condition, they just think they’re so funny and so creative with that comment maybe reserve it to people who know you well, but others could misinterpret your intention which is what i think the video tried to say
You’ve got it all wrong. People who actually have a mental illness (OCD, ADHD, bipolar, etc.) *do not care* about that kind of thing. I mean think about the OCD example in the video for a second. If someone says he’s OCD about something, he’s acknowledging the _spirit_ of the condition. For reference, here’s an example of something that’s _actually_ “offensive:” a teacher tells the class he doesn’t believe in ADHD and that those students are just lazy. Notice how the first example does nothing to actually diminish the group in question while the second one does? That distinction is important.
Can't we just call it what it is- thoughtless remarks and boorish or uncouth behavior? Some of the things mentioned go beyond a tiny aggression. So, honestly, the word to me minimizes certain unwanted behaviors. Therefore, "micro-aggression," is confusing and hard to take seriously.
It’s a micro aggression because it is aggression on a smaller scale. It isn’t necessarily direct and it’s based on prejudices and stereotypes. If that word bothers you that much then you probably have some issues Wentra...
@@anj5901 I think her issue is how the concept of micro aggression appropriates the word aggression and essentially renders it useless. It could also be how the concept is arguably pure sophistry and having no real explanatory power.
"Microaggressions wound people..." no, that's erroneously describing all people as fitting under a same generic label; "some people are wounded by some microaggressions" is correct.
Sorry, but that kind of comment is exactly the kind of microaggression that Ms Alvoid was talking about. You have not considered why that term could be seen as offensive - it is invalidating the lived experiences of individuals of a certain race or marginalised group. Please educate yourself and pause before making a comment. Ask yourself if it is adding value to anybody's life here on YT.
@@iLaulaa go look at what groups in the world pursued “equity” and tell us how it turned out. Equity only exists and works in fantasyland. It is disastrous in real life
@Naomi Carter I think what you meant to say is that treating everyone equally isn’t enough to elevate marginalized people, and I think that misses the point. The way to achieve equality is to treat people equally; the ends never justify the means, two wrongs don’t make a right. An intricate, muddled web of circumstances individually entangles each of us. Ignoring complexity is tantamount to madness.
Ms. Alvoid - For those who value kindness, respect for others, and helping to heal wounds that have been generations in the making, your presentation is a vital roadmap. I hope many listen to and apply what you say. Our deeply divided society would be much better for it.
2:42 For Christ's sake, I've been diagnosed with OCD and never thought to be offended by this. If I say "I'm starving" before lunch break is that offensive to people in Venezuela? Political Correctness is not training people to be respectful, it's training people to see disrespect and feel offended when they otherwise wouldn't, through the power of suggestion. It's cultivating a sick and unnatural mindset.
Oh my god...if you did all of the things she's suggesting (i.e. fine grain analysis of every utterance in your brain before speaking, googling every word before adding it to your vocabulary because someone may be offended, constantly worrying about the possiblity of offending a single person, no matter how minor it may be, etc.) you would never be able to get through the day! The ONLY thing she said that makes any sense at all was the part about kindness and human decency....all you have to do is be a decent person and use common sense...and don't go out of your way to BE OFFENDED by every little thing...god we are just trying into a bunch of whiners and professional victims.
Thank you for this lesson. It is interesting how a definition elicits aggression from some people. I don't see that your words forced anyone to think any specific thought. There are clearly strong emotional responses on this topic.
Yes and I honestly don’t know how they function on a day to day basis. I say this as a guy that was sensitive growing up. The absolute worst thing I could have done is do what this lady recommends
This whole thing is fine as long as it stays in social science and does not cross over into politics to become actual legislation where people get punished by law with the reasoning being their hurt feelings. The message is clear: when you speak mind the tree gates of speech. Is what I want to say true, necessary and kind? If not, maybe I shouldn't say it. And, as everyone without exception is constantly making 'mistakes' when we open our mouth, it is still our own decision to get offended by words of others. Other people might assume things about me, but why should I bother getting offended and assume it was intentional. Thinking too much about this is going to result in a hurt ego. Don't need to make it a problem. Being judged by others doesn't have to trigger my ego and make me judge others in turn.
@@jeremyborno6502 Microagressions are often subjective. The last thing we need in this hypersensitive time is people being echouraged to look for new ways to be offended. I know it may sound radical, but it is actually very reasonable - you should be responsible for your reaction to what others said - the mindset of people that always look for the worst in what everyone says to them is a sick mindset
By the way, im so tired of the paper cut analogy. Why not use the analogy of a callus? Build resilience? Learn to not be so fragile? You can only control what you do? These are all much better mindsets for success and if you're so concerned, breaking stereotypes.
It all boils down to sensitivity and how much you let words or people affect you. If you want to survive you need a strong will, not tears rolling down your face. Im so sick of this baby culture, I'm tired of the triggered crowd, they need to be put in their place.
Seems like you’re the triggered one. Who gets mad about oppressed people not wanting to continue to be oppressed!? Oh yeah, RACISTS. Go get your white hood and leave this chat. 👋🏽
@@brianmeen2158that sounds like you’re just not willing to adjust to make other people feel more comfortable. Some offensive phrases or habits are trained into us, but at that point it’s our job to untrained them. Eliminating micro aggressions wouldn’t eliminate all conversations, it would just adjust conversations to make people feel more safe. I’m sure you want to make people feel safe and respected. And the thing is that we can’t control how others perceive us or react to what we say. But we can control what we say. And if you’re someone that wants to make people feel happy and safe, as I think you are, then it’s your job to try to make it so that your words can’t be taken the wrong way. I have lots of experience with this. Often I say things with good intentions but it comes out wrong and ends up offending people. That’s not my fault that they got offended, but I also have worked really hard to be careful with the words I’m saying so I can try to convey to them the kindness I intend to show. I actually think this consciousness would be really strengthening to relationships, because the people in your life would feel more respected and safe around you. Plus choosing the best words the first time around can save you some uncomfortable apologies and miscommunications. Being a good person takes a lot more effort than being a bad person. And I’m betting you’re a good person, so put in the work for yourself and others in your life.
mi·cro·ag·gres·sion NOUN microaggressions (plural noun) a statement, action, or incident regarded as an instance of indirect, subtle, or unintentional discrimination against members of a marginalized group such as a racial or ethnic minority:
It is so sad how majority of the people in this comment section threw everything that was said in this video completely out the window to defend their own fragile egos. This world does not revolve around you. YES, there are people who get offended by micro-aggressions (that doesn’t mean all that’s why she consistently said “COULD PERCEIVE” ). That doesn’t mean you are destined for scrutiny if u offend someone just idk apologize??? instead of mocking people for having feelings other then ur own. thank you for coming to MY Ted talk.
I'm actually fascinated by this highly polarised comment section, offering some curious insights. Would you agree that at it's core, to be "woke" is to be thoughtful? I feel like this may be the exact point which divides this discussion. I'd love constructive feedback.
The very concept of micro-aggression leads people to walk around each other on eggshells. People will not act like their genuine selves and this then interferes with the development rapport, humor, developing friendships, etc. It is a toxic concept.
This is what happens when people can’t be bothered to focus on actual oppression but want to appear that they are doing so. Props to her for finding a nice niche in the market and profiting off it though
"Microaggressions wound people." This woman got on a stage so that she could say those words. This is what we are fighting for now. We're fighting to stop people from saying things we don't like. Let that sink in.
People need to take back control of their feelings and stop being such a weak pathetic individuals that push responsability for their feelings on others. Grow Up
Altho i agree with the changing times and see these changes as good change, I still reserve the right to chide myself publicly for my ocd or adhd induced behavior in public. If I have those conditions, I can poke fun at myself.
It's good to hear that some people are taking efforts to make this world a better place racially. Not all will care to change but for those who do I appreciate it. People will continue to grow and build. Great efforts are made to divide this country everyday. Work like this will help us persevere in loving work.
@@pads-zr9ln you have the freedom of speech. What type of environment do you want people to live and work in? She is pushing for love. What are you doing?
Build dignity by behaving with integrity. Your wounds are your own business. It's not my job to make you secure. That only works for infants. Don't stay an infant.
These comments are so reflective of where we are today....its so ingrained in everyday life that instead of self reflecting, people get defensive.
Or maybe you can not call unintentional mistakes “micro aggressions” which makes all the people involved walk on egg shells.
A faux pas would be a better word to differentiate intentionality, but micro aggressions just breeds sensitive people and scared people. Words aren’t violence. People make mistakes. Correct them *properly* and move on with your life.
Life has become too easy. We have all the conviences of the modern world, and living is easy. Food is easy to access, youve never hunted an animal or grown a crop to feed yourself. Modern medicine has elimated hundreds if not thousands of ways we used to die from parasites to infections to severe bodily trauma. We have access to almost the entire human race's collective knowledge literally in our pockets, cellphones and computers. We can get into a car or a bus or a plane or a train and travel across land in hours what would have taken us weeks or months before. The point is that now people dont have to worry about real threats like we used to. We used to die from everything. But now, we have so much spare time and we arent feeling threats from every direction anymore, people have to come up with new ways to feel threatened and in danger. Im sorry but life used to be alot harder so we understood what real stress was, what real threats were, what true aggression actually meant. If the only thing youre worried about is how offended you are that someone said something was ghetto, then you obviously are doing well in life because you dont have any bigger issue in your life other than youre offended.
No. It's not defensiveness, it's mockery.
Facts right there
I have OCD and I've heard people make that OCD comment at the beginning and I just take it for what it's worth. I don't find it offensive it never occurred to me to find a offensive because I take it in the spirit that it was meant
Also applies to ADHD, which i have but i understand what people who dont have it say there so ADHD or ADD, i dont get offended because i can realize that it causes more trouble for me to get offended at something that doesnt affect me.
That's why they are telling you so you can be offended. Instead of fixing things in your life that you would like to work on or need to work on blame someone else. It helps take the responsibility off of you.
Thank you normal human who understands context. In this day and age you are a hero.
I'm glad you're not a pansy that gets offended easily and doesn't understand context clues
Also for me with ptsd. People tend to use extreme terms to describe that they feel strongly about something. I know that no one is making fun of ptsd or saying they even have it just because they say they got ptsd from their test or something. There’s no harm done and it shouldn’t be taken too seriously
2:17 as someone with diagnosed OCD, I've never found that comment aggressive. I've always been annoyed by it, yes. Is it ignorance? Absolutely! Is it an attack? No. But I can only speak for myself
that’s why it said “could perceive” . something that may not be offensive to you could be offensive to someone else.
Exactly. I won't mind it either but some people might.
Someone once wrote to a comedian who had made a joke about bipolar disorder and said that he found it terribly offensive and asked him to never make the same joke again.
The following week he wrote in again and said he loved it.
Micro aggressions aren’t necessarily about what is said, it’s about the intention and how other partys perceived it.
@@farmbrough im ded
Let's bring back the common sense and the minimal etiquette in society and everyone will be much more happier.
If there ever WAS common sense in the first place, would we even be in this situation?
@@awllypollyas8292 I've been diagnosed with OCD, and I've never even though to be offended by someone saying "I'm totally OCD about X". This is training people into looking at the world with a sick mindset, trying to find disrespect everywhere.
@@awllypollyas8292 We got in this situation because in first world societies like ours people who don't have to worry about things like war and famine instead create things to victimize themselves.
@@Dennis-nc3vwwe heard you the first time. You don’t have to announce that you have OCD and don’t care if someone is saying “I’m so OCD” in every comment Lmfaoo. You’re not everyone. Some ppl are upset when ppl say that, grow up
@@tp4ever718umm, stop being ableist- she has OCD and thus by the very nature of their affliction cannot help but to comment each time. For someone who seems to think micro-aggressions are not okay, you are not only quick to dismiss this person’s struggles with their disorder , but openly mock their disability
She mentions microaggressions directed at older people but in my experience, microaggressions directed at younger people, especially in the workplace, are just as prevalent.
Amen! Thank you for mentioning this
This is what happens when everyone gets a participation trophy. You're special. You're the best. If things don't go your way it can't be because of you, it must be someone else's fault. I had to earn my trophies. You know how much time I spend caring about what people think about me? Zero.
That's a microaggression.
@@vanillavonchivalry6657 to the microgulag microcomrade
@@vanillavonchivalry6657 Letting yourself get offended will make you a perfect target for trouble. Learn to grow some spheres please.
Aren’t microagressions a thing of the “west”? I live in India and I feel like everyone is microagressing everyone all the time and no one seem to mind.
A lot of kids now are raised as softies here
That’s because people in the West are becoming hyper sensitive snowflakes . It’s beyond the point of absurdity at this point and I’m a person that grew up a bit sensitive. I got over it by doing the exact opposite of what this lady advises
just because people "dont mind" doesn't mean it isn't offensive
@@BrandiForr Just because someone gets offended doesn't mean they're right.
@@Or_else_it_gets_the_hose_again right... they are not right. They are OFFENDED and they have the RIGHT to feel that way.
I'm offended that you are offended.
I’m offended that you feel offended when i am offended!
@@thesenate933 I am offended that you are offended when he is offended that you are offended!
@@DonBelial I'm calling the police, too many offenders.
@@guybob3618 Well, I'm offended by that
That's it. You guys have offended me. I'm on the offensive from now on.
Be aware of personal boundaries, etiquette and don't get too personal with people u don't really know
Sarah , IE minimize communication of any kind with others .
Because we should always take advice from someone who has never met us.
Well said.
Yup, luckily we all have the same standards on where these 'personal boundaried' start and end, etiquette is universal over history, class and cultures, and we never have the interest to get personal to people we don't really don't know yet...
It's not advice. It's called EDUCATION
Microagressions are a slight of hand that those with a victim mentality use to silence and control others. I say stop blaming everyone and everything for how you feel. I say become empowered through knowledge of self and by building self-esteem. I say take ownership of your inner dialogue and feelings. Because once you've accepted responsibility for these things, nothing can hurt you..
Dang. That is a micro aggression towards people with victim mentality, people that blame others, people that silence others, people that control others, people that feel, people that do not empower themselves, people that do not seek knowledge of self, people that do not build self esteem, people that do not take ownership of their own inner dialogue, people that do not take ownership of their feelings, people that do not accept responsibility, people that get hurt and people that define words as micro aggressions.
Dear Alfred, and anyone who agrees with him, I am genuinely concerned with this line of reasoning. It's important to remember the context: we are discussing an individual's experience, which no one else can decide for them. Throughout this comment, but especially by calling their disrespect "sleight of hand", you're saying that it's an illusion - you are denying their right to feel disrespected. You are denying their life experience that has cultivated this insecurity, which they never chose, and obviously haven't been able to process yet. Telling them to get over it is obviously not going to help them overcome this difficulty, which they are obviously struggling with. Rather than to be thoughtful towards their difficulties (whether you believe these to be real or imagined is irrelevant - only to know that they are struggling is enough), you have chosen to be annoyed and dismissive. Not only does your rejection of their reality further distress them, but you also deny yourself the opportunity to learn how to understand and empathise with the difficulties of others. Social culture is built by what we teach ourselves and each other is appropriate behaviour, and language is the code by which we communicate that. Are you not interested in learning to be kinder to others? Or to communicate more effectively? If not, the culmination of your argument is for an individual's right to simply not care about others. Think on that. Why is that so important for you? Do you not want to experience the thoughtfulness of others? To feel that your world is welcoming? Understanding? To reflect your argument back to you: If you don't wish this for yourself or others, why should you have the right to live amongst others only to be careless and unkind?
@@harryturnbull963 nobody is reading your long post. A victim who is externally oriented will never overcome their self trapping mentality until they become internally oriented. What he said is correct, well known, and thoroughly established for the past 1 length of modern society
@@iamjohnrobot I am curious why you believe you are the ultimate authority. You've decided that no one has read my comment, nor agrees with me, both of which are false. In fact, I know you would agree. Consider the principle of reciprocity - this is not simply a moral position of what we wish done to others or ourselves, but rather a causal cycle: what we do to others teaches them how to treat us in return. If you don't care for the suffering of others, expect them to make you suffer. To be clear, I am discussing the lack of social thoughtfulness, which underlies all microaggressions, not the psychology of victimhood (which is an unfortunate state to experience, no one would deny it, being is this individual's responsibility to overcome - but others do not have the right to antagonise a victim like a pack of wild dogs). It's every individual's responsibility to learn the possible sensitivities of those around them, so that we may all better understand and care for each other - so that we may all be treated as we wish to be. The best way to break this cycle, to my knowledge, is for those with this capacity, to treat insensitive individuals with understanding for their lack of awareness, awakening them to the complex realities of others. Unfortunately, insensitive people will be met by reciprocal insensitivity, polarising the discourse and perpetuating the misunderstanding that it's purely about a "victimhood mentality".
@@harryturnbull963 too much to read. I just took the opportunity to disparage your long writing style with no breaks for readability, and obviously was exaggerating overall. First sentence, I don’t. I just believe that after listening to both sides of an argument, and applying logic, it is the duty of the other side to refute the logic.
Explain to me how treating people the way you want to be treated doesn’t cover every single aspect of every single thing she says... Go ahead, and try to avoid a meandering treatise. I haven’t heard anyone explain this.
Surely the term microaggression is itself a "micro-aggression" in that it diminishes the (possibly justified) aggressive intent of the speaker? There needs to be an in-depth dialectic about this, possibly followed by an international conference of qualified womyn and other interested hupersuns. This also highlights the urgent need for law-reform. The time has come when every microaggression results in a micro-case, before a micro-jury, so that a micro-judge can pass a micro-sentence. That would be REAL justice.
*Micro-Justice, please, you just offended me and you need to get into micro-court.
Microaggressions is just over sensitive people protecting their fragile egos by wrapping themselves with an ideological blanket. People use to get over this through rough-play during childhood, but because people grew up being overindulged and coddled, they become sensitive little wimps that constantly need protection from words.
women offend me whenever they speak because i do not believe women deserve to be allowed to speak in public therefore anything a woman says is a microaggression to me
@@k2ggers961 hear hear
*knock* *knock* its the thought police we would like to take some notes
Overly sensitive people need to realize the problem resides more in them than others. Nobody wants to deal with a person always looking to complain
Afckinmen.
Chino, exactly. See my comment for more details.
Your privilege is showing
You are complaining here. I think you are being oversensitive
As someone diagnosed with OCD this video makes me 1000X more angry than anyone who's said "I'm totally OCD about X". Actually, if you took my offense and such comments and multiplied it by 1000, you'd get nothing because 0 X 1000 is still 0.
These are sick people who are training others to see disrespect everywhere. Political Correctness operates through the power of suggestion. It's like the catty mean girl instigator friend who's single and jealous so she says "Why do you let him talk to you like that?" after a benign conversation with your boyfriend, planting the seed in your head you're being disrespected when it never would have crossed your mind otherwise.
Only in a society where people are too comfortable and don't have to worry about real issues would this topic even be discussed... We are destroying ourselves, it's like people are obsessed with being victims and they literally can't allow themselves to experience happiness because they have to find an issue with every nonconsequential part of their existence.
You were obviously raised well and there is hope for the future with people like you. You will be an influence for good. There is usually a good reason why parents name their daughter Charity (I hope that wasn't a miro-aggression).
@@Laurentdu59 hahaha oh no I've been microaggressed! How can I possibly go on? 😤
All jokes aside my mother had high hopes for me with this name, I haven't always lived up to it but I'm trying. I feel so lost in my generation.
@@charitybrook6279 the victim types just love to yell and scream their plight. They are winning in terms of changing society into this bizarre, actually thoughtless, toxic environment, but lots of people hate it and are hoping it burns itself out.
Your comment is dismissive and invalidating. When so many people from marginalized groups, whose lives and struggles you probably know little about are pointing out an issue, your response is "they're victimizing themselves"? And it is obviously a significant part of their existence because microaggressions are hurtful and implicit. They perpetuate stereotypes and uphold discriminatory structures in society. But I guess it would be convenient for someone they don't affect or benefit, to believe they don't exist.
@@ambrosehallward8212 I'm sorry you know nothing about me or my life... But your assumptions could be taken as microaggressions if I was a weaker person.
Here's the deal, a lot of things that are assumed to be microaggressions are simply not. It puts people in a constant state of fear and anxiety around others, and leads to mental health problems and social instability. We all can get our feelings hurt, and there's nothing wrong with that. But what we do with it is up to us, and dwelling on these things is not helpful AT ALL.
If you feel invalidated by my comment, then that's exactly my point. Isn't it exhausting to need to feel validated by everyone all of the time even strangers on the internet?? Be comfortable and confident in yourself and these things won't bother you so much.
I won't bother you with the sob story of my life and injustices that have happened to me, because it's not relevant. I used to dwell on the past, and it kept me from creating a brighter future for myself. I'm in a much better place now, and I hope one day you'll get there too.
By living in fear of microaggressions we are treating them as if they actually hold validity, which they don't. It's better to just forgive and move on. People are happier that way.
By dwelling on such things we do indeed victimize ourselves.
In other words how can I transform myself into an npc where everything I say is throughly processed and filtered because everything I say can be perceived as offensive.
i bet good money he did not watch this video
@@darcdawg333 Meh. If you took gender studies, you don't have any money.
in other words, "i'd like to speak without thinking for the rest of my life, this video makes me feel uncertain and overwhelmed about how foolish I might sound or that I might hurt someone, and frankly I don't care about anybody else enough to be kind. You cannot make me pause and reflect. Back off, lady."
@@kyeflans It is not my job to read your mind and figure out every little detail on things you might find offensive. As long as I speak what I believe is true with a degree of politeness without intentionally insulting everyone, I don't believe I should censor myself. If you disagree, we can have a small conversation on why I'm wrong. In my opinion, people who complain about microaggressions are mentally fragile and need to grow a backbone. I'm more concerned about macroaggresions as in actual violence.
extremes are never good...either direction. this is an extreme.
I know many people who have been victims of micro aggressions. They haven't recovered, and america isn't doing enough to support them.
But worse yet, I have treated sufferers of nano aggressions. They all have the same symptoms, saying : " I was looking for something to blame for my problems and found; people who try make light of situations are the real oppressors."
I even met a few atom aggressors. These people are dangerous. But not as dangerous as the (highly theoretical): quantum aggressive-folk.
Love
Is this the best TH-cam comment ever written?
Brilliant..... I myself am still recovering from a quantom aggressor.... I can't even remember what was said but the pain remains
I am a victim of quark aggresion
I have never recovered from the single worst pico-aggression. It was so vile and cruel, I don't even know what the guy said to me.
I roll my eyes at this whole movement, the most recognizable companies in America have micro and not so micro aggression ingrained in their policies. In my job , I have no rights and no recourse to such things. It's deal with it or quit
Exactly. This is how you turn people into babies.
Taking the soul and joy out of life one piece at a time.
Please help me Oh Government! 🙏
Yea racism is so soulful and joyful
Waaaa @@bw6148
This is what happens when people don’t have any real problems
Sure beats workin'
You're so blind. This is a notion that will be used in cudgel-laws, laws with fines and prison terms attached,
These people are working very hard at grabbing more and more power.
Whereas, the text summary says: "Microaggression is a term used for brief and commonplace daily verbal, behavioral, or environmental indignities, whether intentional or unintentional, that communicate hostile, derogatory, or negative prejudicial slights and insults toward any group.
"
UNFORTUNATELY, in the video, Tiffany Alvoid does NOT define it this way. To her, in her definition, it is ONLY when it is "towards a minority or marginalized group".. Wow.. How Horrible is that??
That is why, I dis-recommend this woman. If she had said "Especially for minority or marginalized group"; I'd have less of an issue. But, everybody deserves respect. Regardless of the "category" of person they are. Shame on Tiffany Alvoid
Thank God, who ever wrote the actual summary, was respectful of ALL people. Not just PC favorites.
Very good point!
I have PTSD. I would not even think of being offended when people use it casually. I know exactly what they mean and they are in NO way trying to belittle people who have it. I can’t imagine what it would be like to have to go to a workplace where people are walking on eggshells and looking to be offended.
I mean basically everyone thinks that way. These people only say these things because they live in an ivory tower and don’t actually know anyone who has the conditions.
I agree! Context matters.
PTSD used to mean a man who had been to war and experienced the gravest horrors a human can experience. Now it means a university educated white woman received a compliment.
I feel very hurt when you accuse me of micro aggression....
Micro aggression inception
That sounds like a personal problem.
@@Wildflower687 Everything Personal is also Political!
Not!!
And that’s the problem with micro aggressions
oh god.. SHE is "helping" companies "address" offensive comments in the workplace.. the future is bleak
@@ABUSEHOUR your moms a hoe
Thankfully, yes. She is giving facts about what, why, how and the so what and now what whether the microaggression is directed at you or someone else and you witness it or whether you are the person who speaks and acts in ways that are microaggessions. MOST people are not intentionally excluding and offensive to others. Yet, it happens. And it's increasing in a world and in nations where people are emboldened and hide (as citizens of the USA) behind the 1st Amendment of the Constitution of the USA, are disconnected from their intent and the impact of their words and deeds on others -- and especially people who tell the offended person they should get over it when they themselves cannot/do not "get over" the fact that someone gave the gift of educating them on how they are being offensive. I find it interesting that people are more and more often being offended because people who have been disrespected/marginalized regularly, historically and currently are finding their voices/standing in their power and telling them their behavior is inappropriate -- even when done so respectfully. And the comeback is real tears, often fake tears, anger and accusation -- it's your fault! If you weren't here (and you shouldn't be), I wouldn't have said it. Oh bring back the good ole' days when these _______s weren't here and only folk like me were. THAT is what this woman is addressing. If it disturbs you, rather than attacking her or shutting what she is saying down and out, I respectfully invite you to examine what your concern is, why you are disturbed and next respectful steps you can take to expand your awareness, knowledge and skill. Of course, I'm assuming you are one of the many who really wants to demonstrate respect for everyone.
I accidently pressed the thumbs up icon and now can't undo it, so I'm adding this comment. The information she shares in this Ted Talk is true, interesting, and relevant to everyone. In my opinion, comments such as yours underscores the truth of her message. It is concrete evidence that some people aren't even aware that what she is saying reflects reality.
I'm OCD about my files because I have OCD, and I do not care if someone who doesn't have it says it.
So a micro aggressions is a stereotype of a group of people.
But saying white privileged is OK?
@@nekaylasmith Yes they are.
@@nekaylasmith Yes, forget their history as well.
this video is a macro-aggression against intelligence.
I’m interested in how you’ve come to that perspective.
@@Wildflower687 dID yOu jUsT rEiNfOrCe a MiCroAgReSsioN?
@@no4869 - that’d be kind of hard to do since micro-aggression haven’t even been mentioned 🤦🏽♀️
@@Wildflower687 because they're not real
@@no4869 - or because they were never mentioned 🤷🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
Talks like this are always eye opening and create a greater awareness of comments that we unconsciously say with no ill intent, but may have that effect. Knowledge from these conversations are power, and that power can fuel the engine of change.
whatever
It’s a shame people in the comment section can’t deal with the fact that maybe they’re the problem and maybe people aren’t just being “overly sensitive”
No. They lack self awareness.
@@frog6306 you called me the problem, that's a microaggressions
@@maryzmijski6087 actually, its an aggression
There is only one race, the human race. I stand by it. Anything else mean some will be treated differently, for good or for worse.
I am indian and I have microagression because I watched this for a full 79 seconds
Well maybe you want to avoid reality so don't watch it.
@@harmony3279 reality is anything but the delusion spoken by this lady 😂
If you ain´t got problems. Just create some......
Delusional.
Person: Sneezes
Me: God Bless You
Person: HOW DARE U
pewds.
@@thomasjoseph3679 yeah ik lol
Lol truly! I will always accept well-intentioned phrases. Someone sneezes, I say bless you! Whether you believe in God or not, accept the blessing. Same goes for holidays, if someone wishes me a Happy Hanukkah, thanks you too, and Merry Christmas as well! Doesn't matter if I celebrate one or the other or both. It's meant in a nice way, accept the well wishes and move on!
Kindness and human decency always win in the end.
You might as well be talking about a rare animal. The amount of hate in the world is far bigger than the amount of kindness. Thank you internet.
Maybe that's just the Internet, not the human race as a whole.
It's not kind and decent to train people to see disrespect everywhere. Political Correctness isn't teaching politeness, it's teaching people to see disrespect and take offense where they'd never think to otherwise. Just as you can train yourself to be paranoid or pessimistic, you can train yourself to be hair-triggered.
@@Dennis-nc3vw I think that's fair, although not all political correctness results in seeing people that way.
@@Dennis-nc3vw being anti-microaggression is not political correctness or something sjw lmao, some random virtue signaling white people on twitter made every single thing 'offensive', it's just that microaggressions are things that could/ could not be in good faith but are still kind of strange, as a person who has actually experienced microaggressions, the reaction isn't hate or anger or anything it's just like "um...... okay....?" kind of reaction. even if it isn't in bad faith it can still be perceived as weird or kind of offensive. sjws just misconstrued the whole thing and turned any question regarding anything "microaggressive", which in and of itself is a microaggression because it's taking something which is related to prejudice and a serious topic and appropriating it to something tiny and insignificant, like a question caused by curiosity and lacking malicious intent.
In other words, you're not allowed to make any jokes unless she says so. Got it.
You eliminate this "micro aggression" by becomming stronger emotionally and thicker skinned instead of expecting others to be subservient to your own frailties and mispreceptions *you* fail to address
Would you say the same thing to someone with disabilities because disabled and mentally ill people also face microaggressions?
@@PeteS_1994 Troll.
@@PeteS_1994 As someone with autism, I feel like you’re insulting me.
Just another example of those with no control over their emotions compensating by controlling the behaviours of others ...oh and throwing yet another barrier up against free speech.
Micro-agression definition will expand over time since people have lots of things that offend them and its not good because your teaching people to be overly sensitive to even the simplest things.
Could we all be more mindful of the speech we use? Probably. Is it anybody else's responsibility to build up your self-esteem and not allow your emotions to be dictated by the words of another? No. That's everybody's personal responsibility. ACTUAL aggression is a problem. Whatever happened to "sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me"? It shouldn't matter in the least what anybody says or thinks about you, and if you love and appreciate who you are at your core, it doesn't.
The problem is that words do actually hurt. Research shows that people who are bullied are more likely to experience depression, anxiety and may even commit suicide.
@Daughter of El Roi Words can hurt, microagressions don’t. That’s the reason they had to stick the “micro-” on
@@daughterofelroi4369 not the point of the term
I see people, including myself, as stereotypes & individuals at the same time, so there.
This is far more informative with the sound muted
Same with ur comment
That's a microaggressions towards deaf people
@@rueeeeeeeeee But it's text, you can't mute text.
@@Judoka008 u really got me there
@@rueeeeeeeeee nah pretty sure that spending an enormous amount of societies resources and human thoughts on backtracking small pieces of conversation to give some people the social “right” to tell others how to speak is pretty pathetic. If not harmful and absolutely damaging the fabric of society. Nothing about micro aggression isn’t already included in traditional “be a good person” wisdom, so his comment was informative that she is saying stuff we all already know, and all already have the tools to deal with.
I was diagnosed with OCD and psychosis when i was 17, 11 years ago. Since then, i have heard countless people call themselves and others "psychos" and "OCD", i have never felt offended by that, not even annoyed by it. I guess maybe i have thicker skin. But that's just me.
Honestly, I think most people in the country are like you. It’s this incredibly vocal minority of thin-skinned toddlers who wine incessantly and demand capitulation
That is an ailment, it's not something that was placed upon you just because of the color you are or aren't.
Deflect or negate if you want.
That's nice that you were able to develop or have a tough skin in order to cope, nevertheless, it barely applies to scenario.
Actually, it applies very much, my apology.
People of color have developed so much tough skin from the NUMEROUS experiences they've had with this and OTHER issues that in one instance, never knowing, they just may POP.
We need not downplay it
@@ThistleRealm i was referring to the part about OCD, but okay? Also, "ailments" are not voluntary either, just like race isn't voluntary. It sounded like you were pitting mental illness against racism, not sure why tho. Could it be that you feel ur personal suffering regarding race trumps others' struggle regarding mental illness? Seems like you're the one downplaying stuff.
Because even though you have OCD and psychosis, you are a person who chose to be a 'fighter' who wanted to conquer/overcome the problems associated with your conditions rather than being a victim wanting to swim in a pool of pity. Also you are a person who does not get offended by trivial things.
@Exterminator It seems like you’re projecting. She never described herself as a fighter or said that she had psychosis.
wait she is serious ?
😂😂😂
Microagression - finding small things to complain about and diverting resources and attention away from important big issues
"Mere proximity to people of color does not make someone woke" hahaha. this is amazing! need to find this woman on social media.
It’s the dumbest thing I have ever heard and basically contradicts her whole stance.😂😂
the irony is that this is an example of what Tiffany calls a 'microaggression'
"Mere proximity to a woke person doesn't make me want to be woke."
Dr. Common Sense.
I loved that too, haha! Sad thing is, I used to believe that it did when I was growing up😭 I live in Spokane, WA, which is crazy white. It took me way too long to learn that treating someone with basic decency doesn’t make someone incredible.
This is a prime example of ideas that went too far. Telling people who believe that they were taught to treat everyone equal that they are guilty of micro-aggression by saying so is just bullying.
"Microagressions": First-world problems.
Propaganda comes in all forms.
The fact we are even having this discussion is ridiculous. I am glad though that my sons will have less competition in the workplace in the future because half of these cry babies will be weeded out. 👍
everyone just needs to stop being so damn sensitive
Agree and I used to be a somewhat sensitive guy . People like this speaker freak me out in their hypersensitivity
Facts
We used to have thick skin and thin skulls, now we have thin skin and thick skulls.
member guys ? I member....
intention and context. If someone uses a cliche, that is what you need to know.
This is what happens when we give out participation trophies instead of rewarding hard work
Factssssssasa
It's like this in all aspects of life now, and it gets worse and worse as the generations go on. Even in sports... kid does terrible, but he's still being told "good job." Why? Small things like that are the reason we have overly sensitive people now.
in other words, when you take issue with somebody for a plethora of subjective reasons but can't actually articulate what's egregious about what that person said or did.
Lead with kindness...that is a great value and mindset!
This is an example of how pathetic woke tyrants have become
this video gave me a new perspective
i didn’t know that self-depricating humor based on attaching some health condition you don’t have could be offensive
it makes sense to me now, because the person saying it doesn’t know how it is to live with that condition, they just think they’re so funny and so creative with that comment
maybe reserve it to people who know you well, but others could misinterpret your intention which is what i think the video tried to say
This is an attack of freedom .
@@joeycottone7169 no, it's an attack on entitlement
You’ve got it all wrong. People who actually have a mental illness (OCD, ADHD, bipolar, etc.) *do not care* about that kind of thing. I mean think about the OCD example in the video for a second. If someone says he’s OCD about something, he’s acknowledging the _spirit_ of the condition.
For reference, here’s an example of something that’s _actually_ “offensive:” a teacher tells the class he doesn’t believe in ADHD and that those students are just lazy.
Notice how the first example does nothing to actually diminish the group in question while the second one does? That distinction is important.
As someone with OCD and ADHD I can tell you it is absolutely not offensive.
Can't we just call it what it is- thoughtless remarks and boorish or uncouth behavior? Some of the things mentioned go beyond a tiny aggression. So, honestly, the word to me minimizes certain unwanted behaviors. Therefore, "micro-aggression," is confusing and hard to take seriously.
It’s a micro aggression because it is aggression on a smaller scale. It isn’t necessarily direct and it’s based on prejudices and stereotypes. If that word bothers you that much then you probably have some issues Wentra...
@@anj5901 I think her issue is how the concept of micro aggression appropriates the word aggression and essentially renders it useless. It could also be how the concept is arguably pure sophistry and having no real explanatory power.
@bob Amen ^_^
if "bruh" was a talk
"Microaggressions wound people..." no, that's erroneously describing all people as fitting under a same generic label; "some people are wounded by some microaggressions" is correct.
So acknowledging "I was raised to treat everyone the same" is a microaggression, now? Wow..
This speaker doesn't want actual equality, At All.
Sorry, but that kind of comment is exactly the kind of microaggression that Ms Alvoid was talking about. You have not considered why that term could be seen as offensive - it is invalidating the lived experiences of individuals of a certain race or marginalised group. Please educate yourself and pause before making a comment. Ask yourself if it is adding value to anybody's life here on YT.
No, she wants equity (entirely different from equality), and ultimately she wants justice for all oppressed groups.
@@iLaulaa go look at what groups in the world pursued “equity” and tell us how it turned out. Equity only exists and works in fantasyland. It is disastrous in real life
Nope, she doesn’t want equality but more wants social revenge. She wants white people to read her mind and walk on eggshells around her .. period
@Naomi Carter I think what you meant to say is that treating everyone equally isn’t enough to elevate marginalized people, and I think that misses the point. The way to achieve equality is to treat people equally; the ends never justify the means, two wrongs don’t make a right.
An intricate, muddled web of circumstances individually entangles each of us. Ignoring complexity is tantamount to madness.
Fighting Nazi's on the beaches of Normandy one generation, and now this in less than 100 years...
"Why does it matter?"
Because she couldn't use my worthless college degree if it didn't.
Imagine being so privileged and not having enough real problems so you invent imaginary Boogeyman problems like "microagressions."
Ms. Alvoid - For those who value kindness, respect for others, and helping to heal wounds that have been generations in the making, your presentation is a vital roadmap. I hope many listen to and apply what you say. Our deeply divided society would be much better for it.
Your misplace your optimism. Attempted elimination of microaggressions engenders divisiveness rather than reducing it.
2:42
For Christ's sake, I've been diagnosed with OCD and never thought to be offended by this. If I say "I'm starving" before lunch break is that offensive to people in Venezuela? Political Correctness is not training people to be respectful, it's training people to see disrespect and feel offended when they otherwise wouldn't, through the power of suggestion. It's cultivating a sick and unnatural mindset.
Context matters. Words are just words, it is the intent behind it that matters
no - its the IMPACT that the words that matters
Oh my god...if you did all of the things she's suggesting (i.e. fine grain analysis of every utterance in your brain before speaking, googling every word before adding it to your vocabulary because someone may be offended, constantly worrying about the possiblity of offending a single person, no matter how minor it may be, etc.) you would never be able to get through the day! The ONLY thing she said that makes any sense at all was the part about kindness and human decency....all you have to do is be a decent person and use common sense...and don't go out of your way to BE OFFENDED by every little thing...god we are just trying into a bunch of whiners and professional victims.
Thank you for this lesson. It is interesting how a definition elicits aggression from some people. I don't see that your words forced anyone to think any specific thought. There are clearly strong emotional responses on this topic.
Thats funny because I've never met a person of color who didn't think we should all be one human race
That is very shocking Jessica
Keep up your searching. How exhausting did you just enter this subject. It will blow your mind :-)
Some people over-analyse so much...
Yes and I honestly don’t know how they function on a day to day basis. I say this as a guy that was sensitive growing up. The absolute worst thing I could have done is do what this lady recommends
I would give my opinion on this, but I want to avoid inadvertently offending someone with a microaggression that I'm not aware of.
This whole thing is fine as long as it stays in social science and does not cross over into politics to become actual legislation where people get punished by law with the reasoning being their hurt feelings. The message is clear: when you speak mind the tree gates of speech. Is what I want to say true, necessary and kind? If not, maybe I shouldn't say it. And, as everyone without exception is constantly making 'mistakes' when we open our mouth, it is still our own decision to get offended by words of others. Other people might assume things about me, but why should I bother getting offended and assume it was intentional. Thinking too much about this is going to result in a hurt ego. Don't need to make it a problem. Being judged by others doesn't have to trigger my ego and make me judge others in turn.
So you are docile, right? Just say that you are docile and you tolerate microaggressions.
@@jeremyborno6502 it’s called free speech
@@jeremyborno6502 Its called free speech u "micro" fascist.
@@jeremyborno6502 Microagressions are often subjective. The last thing we need in this hypersensitive time is people being echouraged to look for new ways to be offended. I know it may sound radical, but it is actually very reasonable - you should be responsible for your reaction to what others said - the mindset of people that always look for the worst in what everyone says to them is a sick mindset
@@magnus08f250 It's called judgement too you punk
Pause, consider “will this person be easily offended by a joke or exaggeration of speech?”
if you’re that desperate to be funny, get a better joke.
&Then- SAY IT ANYWAY :)
@@nunyadambidnissI agree 100%
Literally micromanaging without being employed by someone
By the way, im so tired of the paper cut analogy. Why not use the analogy of a callus? Build resilience? Learn to not be so fragile? You can only control what you do? These are all much better mindsets for success and if you're so concerned, breaking stereotypes.
The only thing we can control is our response.
It all boils down to sensitivity and how much you let words or people affect you. If you want to survive you need a strong will, not tears rolling down your face. Im so sick of this baby culture, I'm tired of the triggered crowd, they need to be put in their place.
Seems like you’re the triggered one. Who gets mad about oppressed people not wanting to continue to be oppressed!? Oh yeah, RACISTS. Go get your white hood and leave this chat. 👋🏽
@@abbeyschaff11 What you claim it's about- AINT WHAT IT'S ABOUT.
Keep FRONTIN'.
Microaggression is in the eye of the beholder.
I think there is a lot of truth to that.
It doesn't exist
You are in denial
Thanks anything else
Pretty soon, we just won’t even be allowed to talk in public
Pretty soon adults will have to monitor their mouths like adults
@@Stephthegreatlion Pretty soon even adults will figure out how to be offended by everything
If we were to truly try and eliminate all
Micro aggressions, it would destroy all types of conversation. It would be crippling to relationships
Coddled
@@brianmeen2158that sounds like you’re just not willing to adjust to make other people feel more comfortable. Some offensive phrases or habits are trained into us, but at that point it’s our job to untrained them. Eliminating micro aggressions wouldn’t eliminate all conversations, it would just adjust conversations to make people feel more safe. I’m sure you want to make people feel safe and respected. And the thing is that we can’t control how others perceive us or react to what we say. But we can control what we say. And if you’re someone that wants to make people feel happy and safe, as I think you are, then it’s your job to try to make it so that your words can’t be taken the wrong way. I have lots of experience with this. Often I say things with good intentions but it comes out wrong and ends up offending people. That’s not my fault that they got offended, but I also have worked really hard to be careful with the words I’m saying so I can try to convey to them the kindness I intend to show. I actually think this consciousness would be really strengthening to relationships, because the people in your life would feel more respected and safe around you. Plus choosing the best words the first time around can save you some uncomfortable apologies and miscommunications. Being a good person takes a lot more effort than being a bad person. And I’m betting you’re a good person, so put in the work for yourself and others in your life.
Microagression is an offensive act dimensions of which is 1x10-⁶ of normal agression.
Micro aggressions are actually defined as “Hyperbole during a conversation for comedic effect.”
mi·cro·ag·gres·sion
NOUN
microaggressions (plural noun)
a statement, action, or incident regarded as an instance of indirect, subtle, or unintentional discrimination against members of a marginalized group such as a racial or ethnic minority:
It is so sad how majority of the people in this comment section threw everything that was said in this video completely out the window to defend their own fragile egos. This world does not revolve around you. YES, there are people who get offended by micro-aggressions (that doesn’t mean all that’s why she consistently said “COULD PERCEIVE” ). That doesn’t mean you are destined for scrutiny if u offend someone just idk apologize??? instead of mocking people for having feelings other then ur own. thank you for coming to MY Ted talk.
Obviously offendeded people exist, the point everyone’s making is that no one should get offended.
Mere proximity to people of color does not make someone “woke”. I live!!!
I don't care, really don't care.
@@swimwithzemen So are you.
@@swimwithzemen I'm sorry you're a leftist.
Ah yes, overthink EVERYTHING. No one can fail. Let's all procrastinate in getting anywhere closer to better
I'm actually fascinated by this highly polarised comment section, offering some curious insights. Would you agree that at it's core, to be "woke" is to be thoughtful? I feel like this may be the exact point which divides this discussion. I'd love constructive feedback.
I learned something by this video. Just because you have a ted talk, doesn’t make you intelligent.
The very concept of micro-aggression leads people to walk around each other on eggshells. People will not act like their genuine selves and this then interferes with the development rapport, humor, developing friendships, etc. It is a toxic concept.
exactly, and idea that creates a very toxic envirornment while trying to do the opposite
EXACTLY
This is what happens when people can’t be bothered to focus on actual oppression but want to appear that they are doing so. Props to her for finding a nice niche in the market and profiting off it though
"Microaggressions wound people."
This woman got on a stage so that she could say those words. This is what we are fighting for now. We're fighting to stop people from saying things we don't like. Let that sink in.
People need to take back control of their feelings and stop being such a weak pathetic individuals that push responsability for their feelings on others. Grow Up
Yeah don't worry, I'm DEFINITELY going to Avoid you, Tiffany 😏
Oh nooo scary words that hurt my feelings!!!!
Altho i agree with the changing times and see these changes as good change, I still reserve the right to chide myself publicly for my ocd or adhd induced behavior in public. If I have those conditions, I can poke fun at myself.
No. This is an assault on free speech
The speaker did make it clear that it is more of a microaggression when the person DOES NOT live with those diagnoses.
It's good to hear that some people are taking efforts to make this world a better place racially. Not all will care to change but for those who do I appreciate it. People will continue to grow and build. Great efforts are made to divide this country everyday. Work like this will help us persevere in loving work.
@@pads-zr9ln you have the freedom of speech. What type of environment do you want people to live and work in? She is pushing for love. What are you doing?
This lady ideas would ruin race relations
@@ThisisKyle that's your uninformed opinion.
@@doccross7667 No it's pretty informed, she wants everyone to notice and worry about skin color, the exact opposite of what Dr. King wanted
@@ThisisKyle go reread some of his work when you get a chance. Not just tokenized phrases.
Build dignity by behaving with integrity. Your wounds are your own business. It's not my job to make you secure. That only works for infants. Don't stay an infant.
Maybe if you all didn't get offended about little things you'd be happier
I have MA training tomorrow with my agency. Looking forward to this training even though its 45 years late!
I did too. It was the dumbest training class I have ever taken ever...period
dindooo alert
This lecture is proof that society has lost its collective mind.
Her first example of Systemic Racism was from 80 years ago LOL None your examples are relevant today.
You must be white
first world problems
My pants are warm. My pants... Are warm.
Ew…
@@bushmg1061 It's a reference
That segment would have been way funnier if you actually had to guess whether it was a micro-aggression.
@@Dennis-nc3vw I like how that isn't, but calling someone a good driver is
Mr.yamashiro is actually a good driver
She takes life way too seriously… people like this woman are making our workplaces worse, not better. Victimhood mentality
You sound toxic af