She also has narcissistic personality disorder as well as the antisocial personality disorder, I have seen many narcissistic people do things like this the comments are mostly positive that I see & As she says about transactional the attention this brings benefits her in probably a few ways,
I don’t mention it because normies don’t grasp the concept of someone seeing someone else as extensions of themselves. They think love is a feeling but for me personally love is the understanding of another persons mind and the embrace of bringing them in to your own mind to grow and protect like a bonsai tree. Sociopaths who are aware and make the conscious effort to do good in the world despite not benefiting directly are probably the only people on earth that are willing to reach out and talk to other damaged people with mental problems.
Actually, me too. I think it's more important to feel comfortable and safe vs feeling "excitement" and the glorified depiction of love that people have in their minds. You can certainly have both if you work for it, but at the end of the day it should leave you feeling authentically you and like you're in a safe and positive presence.
This is a bit different than how you would process the words she is speaking. I understand why you would say that without fully understanding how her mind works. Unfortunately this disorder is a world of hell for everyone involved with her. Count your blessings ❤
@@mshoney9301 not everyone can love unconditionally. Actually, I'd be willing to bet most people can't. The first person to respond to you is obviously one of the people who can't.
This explained a lot for me. Thank you for sharing. My brother is a diagnosed sociopath and he always said he couldnt feel love the way we do but I know he would kill someone to protect me, or would die trying. I never understood why he would be so extremely loyal and yet not make efforts to see me or call me, nor empathize with me. My interactions with him are usually pretty upsetting so I guess the distance is fine but it hurts sometimes to not understand a person whom you loves true regard for you.
I've been so abused for so long that the line between ptsd, cptsd and personality disorder are getting more and more muddled with time, more trauma and no consistent access to effective efficient or even just humanine care. Right now: I have to see the "transactional" layer of human interactions; I must to survive. My mother wrote "good bye and goodluck" on a sticky note after blaming me for being groomed by my therapist, abused and thrown out by him. I asked for a night in one of their many guest rooms to collect myself. I'm technically homeless but a white girl with a car and goodwill game, so no one has noticed yet. ;) But I see before me ways of existentially dealing with "it all". Idk if the coldness I feel towards humanity is aspd or what... I just deeply respect and thank you for sharing your content. Choosing "good" when we want to do "evil" doesn't make us monsters: the people who taught us (at least me) evil get the balme for that.
I love that she is helping people to understand antisocial personality disorder. Her facial expressions make me slightly unnerved, but it’s really amazing seeing her wanting to educate people.
Honestly, you're putting useless work into understanding him when you will never have a husband who will try to understand you. It's not fair at all. I hope you have other close relationships that aren't just one-sided
Automatic sub. I love that you’re talking about it and trying to shed light on it. Regardless of your intentions, this is very helpful for many people.
When seeing people you love as an extension of yourself, is it important for them to imitate your preferred expressions of selfhood, or do you accept that person as a separate self, even if you feel they are an extension of you?
I had a sociopathic teacher who talked about the same things you did. The first thing he said was "never talk to me outside of school, I won't remember your face or name and I'm not going to try" The only thing I really remember was his love for his son, he obviously held disdain for his ex...but his son? He would go to the ends of the Earth for him. My favorite thing was that his son LOVED teens, so he would always drive down to the local gas station the teens hung out at so his son could talk to them, even though my teacher HATED his students.
@@valentinaballerina2104 It isn't a warning. It's pointing out that women also do the same thing. Why are you overcomplicating this small statement 😅😵💫
She is what people use as an insult because they don’t know what it means. Honestly, she’s refreshing instead of always hiding the truth, she comes right out in the open about it
I wish everyone was this honest so that people could make an accurate assessment of who is a good fit for them rather than getting hurt by people pretending to care.
I HATE googling things about sociopaths and finding “they only feel rage” and “they cannot love their children.” The amount of misinformation out there on ASPD, ASD, and NPD is INSANE to me…
Hhhhhhmm...I am not diagnosed but that's exactly how I feel about love and emotional connections to people.... Especially about seeing my loved ones as extensions of myself, feeling safe and unmasking myself in their presence. Oh and being unbelievably loyal.
It's normal not to love others unconditionally. Most people can't or won't love others unconditionally. And those who do or can will only love a few specific people unconditionally. I would say it probably varies from person to person. Most people will view love as transactional but to what degree probably changes, and it'll differ depending on who that person is to them.
I think you are helping humanity making these types of videos. Some people may not see it this way, but it helps us understand the complexity of people. However, I think love in general is a give or take thing anyway, and that's kinda normal, unless you meant transactional in a monetary sense. Keep sharing thjs content cos it's helpful! I really do hope you continue to grow your mind and see how important empathy is in this world by the way. Empathy has almost destroyed me cos I care too much about other people, but I know that if we didn't have people that cared then this world would be hell on earth. Literally.
I think everyone's mind is varying degrees of dark, but not everyone is gonna be honest about it. and even when someone else is, others get judgemental, making the person who is being honest feel alone and feel like their the only one. but you aren't alone, and having dark thoughts isn't an only you thing. I've seen an experienced people do bad things, not feel bad about it, but still not want to own up to it in front of others. but I also understand.
I find your candidness very refreshing. The main thing that’s caused an issue for me in the past being close to someone on the ASPD spectrum, is their dishonesty. As you’re not seeking to hide much from us here, it keeps me interested in finding out more about how you experience the world.
"You're probably not going to like me after this video" I believed you BUT I found myself liking you AND wanting to know more about you. Despite all the sharing you do, you're still mysterious to me. Can you do a video explaining how you got your diagnosis? WHO motivated you to get an assessment? What was your childhood like & did you grow up with both parents in the home? What your motivation was for you to undergo cosmetic procedures? And what age you started doing? Do you take any steps to recognize & hinder sociopathic actions & reactions?
I've been watching you for some time now. I've just got to say, I genuinely appreciate you. It's so amazing to see how much you truly understand yourself and that you're willing to educate and in turn help those out there with the same diagnosis or someone just wanting to understand. Please keep making these videos and sharing your truth and perspective 💞
If people can’t like you after you are completely honest about something that you cannot change at all, then they are the ones with the problem and they need to rethink how they treat others. You have been very clear and honest about what you feel and how and about your life. People just always want to judge others so they can feel better about their own crappy lives. I appreciate your honesty and am learning a lot. Thank you
If you don't like someone/or something it doesn't mean theres a problem lol. I don't care either way however you do not know 100% if someone on the internet is being honest or not. This could be a persona for views. You are taking a strangers word as truth which is fine but there should still be an openness to the possibility that this could be fake.
U have clearly never met a sociopath in real life. If someone tells me their a sociopath and I leave/don't like them that doesn't mean I have a problem. It means I'm sane and have common sense. Don't ever trust a sociopath. She can say she's being honest all she wants. Sociopaths lie to get ppl to like them. And yall r falling for it
I'm not neurotypical (ASD and BPD) but I believe love is kind of transactional? Like I've been in relationships where all I do is give and all the other person does is take and it's exhausting. You feel like they don't love you back and eventually it breaks you and you've got to end it. You can't just give and give without nothing in return.
I'm neurodivergent as well. A mix between bipolar spectrum and autistic. So in general I feel more comfortable with other neurodivergent people. I have a dark mind too and I don't feel disturbed because I have a VERY cuestionable moral compass since I despise most of social norm since it's very oppressive. I think we could get along just fine. I have a massive empathy tho ahaha
I have borderline personality disorder and I have a number of other mental health challenges. Relationships have been transactional for me. I do have a great capacity to love but it’s easier for me to take away that love when I feel like I have been betrayed. The only people from whom I have undying love for is my best friend of 30 years, my children, and my cat. That’s it. There is a level of unconditional love I feel for very vulnerable people especially people with profound disabilities and who are marginalized and oppressed. I have contempt for people with privilege and I have a little contempt for myself because with borderline everything starts with hating ourselves first. Sometimes I wonder if I’m capable of real true love and there are plenty of days I don’t feel worthy of love. Relationships in general are transactional and one doesn’t have to be a sociopath to experience that. It’s unfair to Single yourself out that way so please don’t do it. I understand you’re being honest but we all have transactional relationships. However I do appreciate your experiences As a sociopath and I can see where you’re making that distinction as well.
So does the feeling of being betrayed in a love relationship happen when you don't get your 'expected' share or outcome out of that transaction?? If so.. What kind of having a great capacity to love are you talking about then??
as someone with autihd it's interesting how there is some crossover in the viewing loved ones as an extension of yourself thus having fierce loyalty etc
It’s pretty normal to feel some of what you described, the transactional aspect doesn’t really bother me. Of course if I was your friend discarding would scare me because I know I’ll never be closest to you. But other than that your content is lovely, interesting, and an inspiration to many people with cluster B disorders.
For me (a self-suspecting probable sociopath) people are divided in four types: Slip: those I ignore Grip: those I keep around Rip: those I take from Burn: those that are dead to me
Kanika, thank you for your honesty about your feelings and experiences about living with ASPD. People often demonize those with personality disorders, while it would be more helpful to us all to learn more about them.
It's fascinating to hear about stuff like this from such a different perspective from mine. I can't imagine really any thought process more different from mine (although I suppose that would be defeating the purpose) as I have hyperempathy from the emotional dysregulation part of ADHD. You say you view your loved ones as a part of yourself, and I remember in another video you said you don't ride people's emotional waves. I'm pretty much exactly the reverse of that. I "ride emotional waves" very strongly because I pick up on and internalise them, and sometimes it feels like I'm less something of my own than an extension of whoever I'm with. Some people induce this in me more than others, and it also depends on my own mental health, but if I don't watch myself it can get really bad.
I love how honest she is about this. It took a while for me to share my very inner dark thoughts and feel safe sharing them with my current partner of nearly 10 years.
I think love for everyone is pretty much the same dressed up a little different. You call it transactional while a neurotypical will say “give and take”
To take is having expectations that are limited by satisfactory standards of wuality and quantity. To receive is to be open and equally accepting of the good, bad and ugly from the other side, with compassion and understanding
I respect how open you are about it , I may not agree with a lot of the actions but it takes a lot to recognize your diagnoses and try to control certain behaviors/actions or even admit to them .
Very very *VERY* few people are capable of loving others unconditionally and even then those who are capable of it, won't be able to love everyone in their life unconditionally. there are also those who are capable of it but either won't or don't know how. Usually because of how they've been treated, how they were raised, and/or their relationship influences.
I came across your shorts the other day and tbh honest they are quite an eye opener. The more I see of you the more I have questioned myself I realise I may have some sociopathic tendencies.
It really bumped me when you said “unfortunately” about your mind. Maybe it’s just about your experience living with it. I think you are beautiful in every way and should not be ashamed of how your mind works. Each mask is a self-portrait, smth like that I heard in Sherlock, and I like this painting you’ve made, it’s unique, thoughtful, it has substance. If there will be any time the painter herself would want to come on stage, I will be excited to meet this person. Like meeting a designer after fashion show.
I feel like this is just normal, but people don't talk about this to protect their identity. Altough the feeling of thinking you might be something like a sociopath can go away with the right circumstances I could be wrong tho
It makes sense to me that you experience love through people being an extension of yourself. How do you develop those relationships? Is it strictly among your family or do you have friends you love? What about partners?
I think she meant the contents of her mind. What does dark mind mean specifically? Is she always plotting revenge? Does she always think of violence? When she meets someone is she assessing the ways they can get killed? It’s easy to brush off that sentence(I immediately did) when it’s so vague. It’s like if I told you “I’ve done some things that I regret”. What are the things? Is it as big as killing someone? Or ruining my friends birthday in first grade?
@@Thatscrazyyourecrazy it’s all about perception for us, even though she may display some of herself she portrays it in a way that it doesn’t seem so bad which is a skill. Also by being humble about these bad behaviours, it makes people realize we are aware of our faults and gives them the idea that we might relief to in them in the way other people might but rather we reflect on these things almost as badges of honor.
I do have love for certain people that I can say is real authentic love will love the person always. Soul family it's the person I would also help and have fondness and love for will not block or reject I can truly love and mean it deep within. There are people I do have no regard for and have discarded many people block and gone cold. I would say I can truly love and once my heart is open for you I am kind and it's real not fake . I am trying to zoom haven't used zoom before. You can see when I look at you when my eyes turn soft and a bit watery soul family will know the love is real never hurt. I also have had people that I did not care for one bit had to pretend and glad the relationship ended . With real love you just know it's so much more and you see the person within it's beautiful. Friendship or romantic wise soul family also have a lot of patience with one another. It's kind and gentle. Warm hearted feelings .
a glimpse of emotion. sad to see you act this way because you feel unsafe. good thing you have people around that make you feel safe. thank you for your honesty.
One of my closest friends is a diagnosed sociopath as well. I’ve heard sociopaths describe friendships like watching movies with characters that you hope for the best for, but don’t care much about the outcome. I think that’s how he views me, and I honestly don’t mind much cause we have a good friendship regardless
Lol. Trained psychologist here. VERY few people with ASPD ever let on. Ever. And they definitely won't seek attention for it or announce it, it's literally something to hide. My guess is BPD. (I can only say this since I'm no longer practicing and it's not medical advice.)
"You probably won't like me after this." No. I'm fascinated by you and wish to hear more of your dark mind. And your honesty is refreshing. At least you can admit your love is transactional.
@@imjustsayin34 There aren't many good things you can learn about sociopaths regarding love except how to avoid them. Neurotypicals should not take lessons in love from a sociopath. You will end up damaging yourself and the people you hope to love.
Dark doesn't equate to evil, and I need your audience to comprehend this. Fierce loyalty, give and take, and safety in presence are all components of love, so I would say that you definitely do love.
People can have God in their life and still love and feel emotions differently. The world is diverse. There's no right or wrong way to love and telling someone that finding religion will change a literal mental disorder isn't going to magic it away. I believe in God and I pray every day. That won't take away the fact that I have OCD and it's not going to magically change how I feel about people. I am who I am and God knows that I'm doing my best.
I'm not neurotypical either (I have autism and ADHD) I am capable of feeling empathy and remorse but it looks a little different For me love is also about a comfort level and I'm also fiercely loyal with the few I love. Whilst I do show my affinity for someone thru transactions I do not expect and equal amount of favors in return. This is because I already view them being a part of life as a positive influence in my life in itself, and thereby the effort I put them and the results I get out of the relationship as equal.
the new edgy stuff 🙄 maybe not her but impressionable teenagers that throw those terms without doing research, they think antisocial is not having friends when in reality it is a term that can be used to describe criminal behavior.
I wanted to share this because it shows that regardless of what people feel inside and regardless of any diagnosis-people may end up seeing others in black-and-white for many reasons. I am probably on the extreme end of empathetic and sensitive, but I make very similar choices in how I see other people. I was once the victim of someone on the narcissistic/aspd spectrum, and it only took once for me to erect major protective boundaries. These have lasted years. I am an introvert and prefer to spend most of my time alone; showing up for others can be exhausting. I feel that if they haven’t had trauma like mine, their emotions are not my problem or mine to take on. If someone betrays me ONCE they are out of my life, and I will never regard them the same. The anger will not pass. I can simultaneously miss them, and be sad about a ruined friendship. But I cannot forgive, either, or give them an ounce of me ever again. Perhaps at some point, there is a bell curve effect in which people who have been victimized adopt some characteristics of the personality types we associate with abuse. If so, it isn’t a bad thing-I will never ever allow my self to victimized again, I will always be confident that I have the right to judge others at a first glance to keep myself safe. The “me first” attitude has helped me immensely for fifteen years. My feelings are deep and my love freely within me, but I am in control of them and they will not cause me to lower my guard. I suspect that people have thought of me as cold and intimidating for this reason. I want my romantic relationships to be business-like and clear, with some professional feeling distance. That ensures respect and loving up to each other’s expectations without becoming emotionally enmeshed. I love that Kanika is showing that not all people with this diagnosis actively seem to harm others, that there is diversity among people with this diagnosis, and what it is like for her. I love that she is advocating for more woman to adopt a “me first” attitude with strict expectations of others. This is what I did, and will do forever. It has prevented me from being a repeat victim as so many women are. Spot on.
I’m divorced with 4 grown children. I “love” them to the best of my ability to love. I don’t think it’s completely unconditional though. I live alone now. They don’t call or reach out to me too much. I wish they did more. So I reach out. But, I feel a little betrayed that as their ONLY FATHER, loving me seems taken for granted. That burns. Because I engage more. I’m EXPECTED to. Maybe I’ve never loved ANYONE unconditionally? What does that mean? I don’t know but you made me stop and think about how I relate. I’m best being completely alone.
could you touch on what its like for you when someone you know, dies? at first i thought my ex was a narc, but after watching your vids, im starting to wonder him being a sociopath. he once told me, "I dont understand why people get so upset when people die. like, when my mom dies im sure ill be upset. but friends? i dont really feel anything. its sad, but people die. thats just what happens." this completely floored me, as someone who's biggest fear in life is watching my loved ones leave me to walk the Earth alone. hell, when Alan Rickman died, i cried. when David Bowie died, i cried. when a younger classmate that i had barely uttered 3 words to, died, i cried. i just couldnt imagine NOT being flooded with so many emotions when someone leaves this planet. its just so confusing.
I actually really like this explanation. It seems very much honest and selfaware and describing how your neurodivergent mind works. What intrest me is that it seems like some codependency that is described here only the narcissist/ASP is more aware of how it involves their image and how it can fuel their needs. If that isn't the case the narcissist seem to be able to easily see them failing and cut them of as it isn't benefitial anymore. Where as the partner would also be codependent, and they feel they need to perform to get the breadcrumbs wich is also transactional to get acces to the affection but this is less benefitial in the end. Either way we see 2 sides of the codependency medal. Intresting to think there is a similarly there.
I understand the idea of love being transactional, two people in any kind of relationship should be secure and safe enough in the relationship to take and give from each other. I feel the same way, I have only two people I feel like I can be myself around, but even then its not completely open and vulnerable. I also have had many more people tell me that they didn’t see me as valuable to them, people that should’ve been the ones I could trust the most. Detachment is a very valuable tool to use when dealing with people.
I love how honest she is about this. I feel like most sociopaths would never admit to this stuff because they lose their power over people
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
I feel like this actually gave her more power in a unique way. It’s the blatant honesty for me.
She gains power💰
She also has narcissistic personality disorder as well as the antisocial personality disorder, I have seen many narcissistic people do things like this
the comments are mostly positive that I see & As she says about transactional the attention this brings benefits her in probably a few ways,
I don’t mention it because normies don’t grasp the concept of someone seeing someone else as extensions of themselves. They think love is a feeling but for me personally love is the understanding of another persons mind and the embrace of bringing them in to your own mind to grow and protect like a bonsai tree. Sociopaths who are aware and make the conscious effort to do good in the world despite not benefiting directly are probably the only people on earth that are willing to reach out and talk to other damaged people with mental problems.
Love is taking off the mask, feeling comfortable, and safe. I can relate to that.
Actually, me too. I think it's more important to feel comfortable and safe vs feeling "excitement" and the glorified depiction of love that people have in their minds. You can certainly have both if you work for it, but at the end of the day it should leave you feeling authentically you and like you're in a safe and positive presence.
This is a bit different than how you would process the words she is speaking. I understand why you would say that without fully understanding how her mind works. Unfortunately this disorder is a world of hell for everyone involved with her. Count your blessings ❤
She literally described what love is to normal people. She doesnt have what she claims to have.
Never feel safe with a woman, never be vulnerable, be like rock 🪨
666 likes
“You probably won’t like me after this video…”
Actually, honesty is refreshing in a world that embraces “nice-ness”
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Sycophant.
Nice-ness is bullshit, some people need to be confronted
@@benshiffman7765 confrontation implies weak ego…
@@mewho6199 …jealous…
Love is transactional for pretty much all of us on some level. Wish we had more than 1 word to convey so many different things.
i believe every relationship is transactional
*edit: relationship as in friend, coworker, neighbor, boyfriend, wife, family, employee, etc etc
unless it's unconditional love
@@mshoney9301 unconditional doesn’t exist
@@mshoney9301 not everyone can love unconditionally. Actually, I'd be willing to bet most people can't. The first person to respond to you is obviously one of the people who can't.
@@sierrafairbanks7776 sad but true
This explained a lot for me. Thank you for sharing. My brother is a diagnosed sociopath and he always said he couldnt feel love the way we do but I know he would kill someone to protect me, or would die trying. I never understood why he would be so extremely loyal and yet not make efforts to see me or call me, nor empathize with me. My interactions with him are usually pretty upsetting so I guess the distance is fine but it hurts sometimes to not understand a person whom you loves true regard for you.
Sounds like my mom actually... try having a parent like this...
Hé manipulate you IS dangerous
Same with my brother, I'm starting to suspect he is one also
My younger brother is also diagnosed A.S.P.D.
I've been so abused for so long that the line between ptsd, cptsd and personality disorder are getting more and more muddled with time, more trauma and no consistent access to effective efficient or even just humanine care. Right now: I have to see the "transactional" layer of human interactions; I must to survive. My mother wrote "good bye and goodluck" on a sticky note after blaming me for being groomed by my therapist, abused and thrown out by him. I asked for a night in one of their many guest rooms to collect myself. I'm technically homeless but a white girl with a car and goodwill game, so no one has noticed yet. ;) But I see before me ways of existentially dealing with "it all". Idk if the coldness I feel towards humanity is aspd or what... I just deeply respect and thank you for sharing your content. Choosing "good" when we want to do "evil" doesn't make us monsters: the people who taught us (at least me) evil get the balme for that.
I love that she is helping people to understand antisocial personality disorder. Her facial expressions make me slightly unnerved, but it’s really amazing seeing her wanting to educate people.
My husband is a diagnosed sociopath. He's always saying that i'm a part of him. You're helping me to understand him. Thank you.
You need to leave instead of watching videos on TH-cam
Honestly, you're putting useless work into understanding him when you will never have a husband who will try to understand you. It's not fair at all. I hope you have other close relationships that aren't just one-sided
Sounds scary.
@@Mo.1988 fr bruh
@@peanut_toast999this is not all sociopaths literally not all that bad
Automatic sub. I love that you’re talking about it and trying to shed light on it. Regardless of your intentions, this is very helpful for many people.
Exactly. I also don’t care that this is masturbatory. It’s still super intriguing 😂
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
@@daisyflower8362 Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
@@daisyflower8362 wdym it's mastubatory
When seeing people you love as an extension of yourself, is it important for them to imitate your preferred expressions of selfhood, or do you accept that person as a separate self, even if you feel they are an extension of you?
Narcissists do that, and when you don't behave in line with the rules and the mould that they have put you in, there is hell to pay.
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
@Mar Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
I had a sociopathic teacher who talked about the same things you did. The first thing he said was "never talk to me outside of school, I won't remember your face or name and I'm not going to try"
The only thing I really remember was his love for his son, he obviously held disdain for his ex...but his son? He would go to the ends of the Earth for him. My favorite thing was that his son LOVED teens, so he would always drive down to the local gas station the teens hung out at so his son could talk to them, even though my teacher HATED his students.
When a man I'm dating describes himself as "loyal", I see that as a red flag.
Same for women.
@@cheesemuffin8129 I'm a heterosexual woman so I only date men.
Well as a heterosexual man, I and many others, can tell you that it's the same for women.
@@cheesemuffin8129 well thanks for that but like I said, I don't date women so I don't need that warning lol
@@valentinaballerina2104 It isn't a warning. It's pointing out that women also do the same thing.
Why are you overcomplicating this small statement 😅😵💫
Every codependent and BPD person in he comments : “thank you for your honesty. I like you even more after this.”
Lol just dumb
😅
I loled to this. It's literally closure. Finally a rational answer
How twisted are we 😆
WHY R WE ALL HERE IS IT BC WE KEEP LOVING SOCIOPATHS??? lol
She is what people use as an insult because they don’t know what it means. Honestly, she’s refreshing instead of always hiding the truth, she comes right out in the open about it
I wish everyone was this honest so that people could make an accurate assessment of who is a good fit for them rather than getting hurt by people pretending to care.
"Love for me is about taking off the mask and feeling comfortable"
As an autistic person, _I felt that._
Same
Same
I HATE googling things about sociopaths and finding “they only feel rage” and “they cannot love their children.” The amount of misinformation out there on ASPD, ASD, and NPD is INSANE to me…
Hhhhhhmm...I am not diagnosed but that's exactly how I feel about love and emotional connections to people....
Especially about seeing my loved ones as extensions of myself, feeling safe and unmasking myself in their presence. Oh and being unbelievably loyal.
Same… glad to see someone else say this bc my heart sank for a second 😂😂😂
A lot of ppl feel that way
Bless you for being so honest and vulnerable about yourself. You are helping more people than you could ever imagine💜
I think most neurotypical people dont have a healthy undestamding eighter. If your love makes your chosen one happy thats all thats important
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's..
Her honesty and integrity is a stepping stone to trust. I admire her loyalty 🤗🤗🌞🌞🌻🌻
Integrity???
😑You can’t be serious.
It's normal not to love others unconditionally. Most people can't or won't love others unconditionally. And those who do or can will only love a few specific people unconditionally. I would say it probably varies from person to person. Most people will view love as transactional but to what degree probably changes, and it'll differ depending on who that person is to them.
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
true. i've always felt like unconditional love really only makes sense between a guardian and their child.
That is sad. I don’t see love that way.
@@avril.227That’s how love is for most humans though.
I respect her honesty 💯 she seems to know & understand herself. That’s more than most of us can say.
I think you are helping humanity making these types of videos. Some people may not see it this way, but it helps us understand the complexity of people. However, I think love in general is a give or take thing anyway, and that's kinda normal, unless you meant transactional in a monetary sense. Keep sharing thjs content cos it's helpful! I really do hope you continue to grow your mind and see how important empathy is in this world by the way. Empathy has almost destroyed me cos I care too much about other people, but I know that if we didn't have people that cared then this world would be hell on earth. Literally.
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
You’re beyond naive
@@Mo.1988 thanks for your input that meant absolutely nothing to me 💕💕
I think everyone's mind is varying degrees of dark, but not everyone is gonna be honest about it. and even when someone else is, others get judgemental, making the person who is being honest feel alone and feel like their the only one. but you aren't alone, and having dark thoughts isn't an only you thing. I've seen an experienced people do bad things, not feel bad about it, but still not want to own up to it in front of others. but I also understand.
I find your candidness very refreshing. The main thing that’s caused an issue for me in the past being close to someone on the ASPD spectrum, is their dishonesty. As you’re not seeking to hide much from us here, it keeps me interested in finding out more about how you experience the world.
"You're probably not going to like me after this video" I believed you BUT I found myself liking you AND wanting to know more about you. Despite all the sharing you do, you're still mysterious to me.
Can you do a video explaining how you got your diagnosis?
WHO motivated you to get an assessment?
What was your childhood like & did you grow up with both parents in the home?
What your motivation was for you to undergo cosmetic procedures?
And what age you started doing?
Do you take any steps to recognize & hinder sociopathic actions & reactions?
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's..
Curiosity killed the cat
She already did these videos just go to her channel
You cannot be serious
Don’t forget to add what you ate for breakfast 😂😂😂
I've been watching you for some time now. I've just got to say, I genuinely appreciate you. It's so amazing to see how much you truly understand yourself and that you're willing to educate and in turn help those out there with the same diagnosis or someone just wanting to understand. Please keep making these videos and sharing your truth and perspective 💞
Well said. I too appreciate the candid information.
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
@@enyayannidido Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
Thats very nice, just know the feeling is not mutual.
If people can’t like you after you are completely honest about something that you cannot change at all, then they are the ones with the problem and they need to rethink how they treat others. You have been very clear and honest about what you feel and how and about your life. People just always want to judge others so they can feel better about their own crappy lives. I appreciate your honesty and am learning a lot. Thank you
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
If you don't like someone/or something it doesn't mean theres a problem lol. I don't care either way however you do not know 100% if someone on the internet is being honest or not. This could be a persona for views. You are taking a strangers word as truth which is fine but there should still be an openness to the possibility that this could be fake.
Research "enabling"
U have clearly never met a sociopath in real life. If someone tells me their a sociopath and I leave/don't like them that doesn't mean I have a problem. It means I'm sane and have common sense. Don't ever trust a sociopath. She can say she's being honest all she wants. Sociopaths lie to get ppl to like them. And yall r falling for it
I'm not neurotypical (ASD and BPD) but I believe love is kind of transactional? Like I've been in relationships where all I do is give and all the other person does is take and it's exhausting. You feel like they don't love you back and eventually it breaks you and you've got to end it. You can't just give and give without nothing in return.
I'm neurodivergent as well. A mix between bipolar spectrum and autistic. So in general I feel more comfortable with other neurodivergent people. I have a dark mind too and I don't feel disturbed because I have a VERY cuestionable moral compass since I despise most of social norm since it's very oppressive. I think we could get along just fine. I have a massive empathy tho ahaha
You can say murder it's okay.
(Yes I'm joking lol) 😆👀
I have borderline personality disorder and I have a number of other mental health challenges. Relationships have been transactional for me. I do have a great capacity to love but it’s easier for me to take away that love when I feel like I have been betrayed. The only people from whom I have undying love for is my best friend of 30 years, my children, and my cat. That’s it. There is a level of unconditional love I feel for very vulnerable people especially people with profound disabilities and who are marginalized and oppressed. I have contempt for people with privilege and I have a little contempt for myself because with borderline everything starts with hating ourselves first. Sometimes I wonder if I’m capable of real true love and there are plenty of days I don’t feel worthy of love.
Relationships in general are transactional and one doesn’t have to be a sociopath to experience that. It’s unfair to Single yourself out that way so please don’t do it. I understand you’re being honest but we all have transactional relationships. However I do appreciate your experiences As a sociopath and I can see where you’re making that distinction as well.
Well all cluster B are like that borderline narcissistic sociopath and psychopath
All of this sis. You aren't alone. ❤
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
@@jasminekoidhis2893 Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
So does the feeling of being betrayed in a love relationship happen when you don't get your 'expected' share or outcome out of that transaction??
If so.. What kind of having a great capacity to love are you talking about then??
as someone with autihd it's interesting how there is some crossover in the viewing loved ones as an extension of yourself thus having fierce loyalty etc
I read that ADHD and ASPD are often comorbid conditions
I know what she saying isn’t really things that are right but I appreciate the honesty and gives me a deeper level of understanding
It’s pretty normal to feel some of what you described, the transactional aspect doesn’t really bother me. Of course if I was your friend discarding would scare me because I know I’ll never be closest to you. But other than that your content is lovely, interesting, and an inspiration to many people with cluster B disorders.
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's..
For me (a self-suspecting probable sociopath) people are divided in four types:
Slip: those I ignore
Grip: those I keep around
Rip: those I take from
Burn: those that are dead to me
I like you more and more with every honest thing about yourself. It keeps me encouraged to do the same ❤
Thank you for talking about personality disorders so honestly. I have a different PD And find many similarities between us, I feel very represented
That’s actually a very cool way to look at love! For me it’s similar, especially when it comes to love representing safety and being able to unmask.
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's..
Kanika, thank you for your honesty about your feelings and experiences about living with ASPD. People often demonize those with personality disorders, while it would be more helpful to us all to learn more about them.
The more you talk.... the more I think I need to see if I have this disorder as well. I definitely need to learn more about it.
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's..
It's fascinating to hear about stuff like this from such a different perspective from mine. I can't imagine really any thought process more different from mine (although I suppose that would be defeating the purpose) as I have hyperempathy from the emotional dysregulation part of ADHD.
You say you view your loved ones as a part of yourself, and I remember in another video you said you don't ride people's emotional waves. I'm pretty much exactly the reverse of that. I "ride emotional waves" very strongly because I pick up on and internalise them, and sometimes it feels like I'm less something of my own than an extension of whoever I'm with. Some people induce this in me more than others, and it also depends on my own mental health, but if I don't watch myself it can get really bad.
Appreciate your honesty/ perspective 🔥 you are what you are & it’s not good or bad it just IS
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
... Until you fall licking your deep wounds as one of her victims.. 🙄
I love how honest she is about this. It took a while for me to share my very inner dark thoughts and feel safe sharing them with my current partner of nearly 10 years.
NGL, She often makes me think I might be a sociopath 😅
That’s probably because a lot of what she’s describing is normal for basically everyone
@@zelahfines6535 you people are crazy . I only see this in patients i work with . don't normalise it
I think love for everyone is pretty much the same dressed up a little different. You call it transactional while a neurotypical will say “give and take”
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
No, a healthy neurotypical would say "give and receive".
HUGE difference.
To take is having expectations that are limited by satisfactory standards of wuality and quantity. To receive is to be open and equally accepting of the good, bad and ugly from the other side, with compassion and understanding
I respect how open you are about it , I may not agree with a lot of the actions but it takes a lot to recognize your diagnoses and try to control certain behaviors/actions or even admit to them .
But all love is transactional. I don’t think I’m a sociopath but I don’t see how love CANT be transactional
Very very *VERY* few people are capable of loving others unconditionally and even then those who are capable of it, won't be able to love everyone in their life unconditionally. there are also those who are capable of it but either won't or don't know how. Usually because of how they've been treated, how they were raised, and/or their relationship influences.
I came across your shorts the other day and tbh honest they are quite an eye opener. The more I see of you the more I have questioned myself I realise I may have some sociopathic tendencies.
It really bumped me when you said “unfortunately” about your mind. Maybe it’s just about your experience living with it. I think you are beautiful in every way and should not be ashamed of how your mind works. Each mask is a self-portrait, smth like that I heard in Sherlock, and I like this painting you’ve made, it’s unique, thoughtful, it has substance.
If there will be any time the painter herself would want to come on stage, I will be excited to meet this person. Like meeting a designer after fashion show.
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's..
@@rb1278 Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's..
she doesn't feel shame
Omfg
I feel like this is just normal, but people don't talk about this to protect their identity. Altough the feeling of thinking you might be something like a sociopath can go away with the right circumstances
I could be wrong tho
It makes sense to me that you experience love through people being an extension of yourself. How do you develop those relationships? Is it strictly among your family or do you have friends you love? What about partners?
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's..
I love you and your boundary-breaking content. Love and respect from a deep empath who learns a lot from you.
In your definition what does it mean to have a "dark mind?" That can mean a lot of things and be very broad
i assume it means having thoughts, ideas, interests, beliefs, or desires that aren't deemed socially acceptable.
These videos are actually crazy informative
Thank you for making them 🙂
"I would not reveal that to too many people "As she reveals she has a dark mind to millions of people!?
I think she meant the contents of her mind. What does dark mind mean specifically? Is she always plotting revenge? Does she always think of violence? When she meets someone is she assessing the ways they can get killed?
It’s easy to brush off that sentence(I immediately did) when it’s so vague.
It’s like if I told you “I’ve done some things that I regret”. What are the things? Is it as big as killing someone? Or ruining my friends birthday in first grade?
It’s also something I thought. I often take things she says with a grain of salt since manipulation or charm can be at play
@@Thatscrazyyourecrazy it’s all about perception for us, even though she may display some of herself she portrays it in a way that it doesn’t seem so bad which is a skill. Also by being humble about these bad behaviours, it makes people realize we are aware of our faults and gives them the idea that we might relief to in them in the way other people might but rather we reflect on these things almost as badges of honor.
I guess she loves us😂
@@MarquesAlleyne 😂🤣
I wish a lot of protection for u, against those who tries to twist this out
Imagine thinking you got to competent ruin someone just because they stepped on their toes.
I love you girl because you are sooo yourself, not wearing a mask like millions of wrong people ❤
Thank you for spreading awareness for the neurodivergent community ❤
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
I love you and your authenticity to a different level. Let's just take a moment to appreciate that.
I do have love for certain people that I can say is real authentic love will love the person always. Soul family it's the person I would also help and have fondness and love for will not block or reject I can truly love and mean it deep within. There are people I do have no regard for and have discarded many people block and gone cold. I would say I can truly love and once my heart is open for you I am kind and it's real not fake . I am trying to zoom haven't used zoom before. You can see when I look at you when my eyes turn soft and a bit watery soul family will know the love is real never hurt. I also have had people that I did not care for one bit had to pretend and glad the relationship ended . With real love you just know it's so much more and you see the person within it's beautiful. Friendship or romantic wise soul family also have a lot of patience with one another. It's kind and gentle. Warm hearted feelings .
Based on ehat parameters you choose who you love and who you don't care about? Or maybe if you don't choose, how does it work?
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Thankyou so much for shedding light on this.
Yes you can love. Resist the urge to hurt people. You can do it😚🤗🤗🤗
Youre really good at putting this stuff into words.
a glimpse of emotion. sad to see you act this way because you feel unsafe. good thing you have people around that make you feel safe. thank you for your honesty.
I trust this woman more than those who keep insisting their "good people"
That’s what I recently told my husband!! I said, “I am super selfish… you’re just part of my self, so you’re included”
Cringe
Lot's of Trust Respect, Loyalty Honestly made me finally Cured from Diabetes%Herpes simplex with #Drdodoyi herb's.
@@davids8127 it can be cringe bit it's true for some people.
@@davids8127That's the truth, you may find it cringe.
I respect you honesty and insights.
One of my closest friends is a diagnosed sociopath as well. I’ve heard sociopaths describe friendships like watching movies with characters that you hope for the best for, but don’t care much about the outcome. I think that’s how he views me, and I honestly don’t mind much cause we have a good friendship regardless
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
Thank you for leveling the playing field here for us. There are a lot more men with your mindset than women. Wise up Ladies. Subscribed.
I've got to say I'm quite similar. I'm just autistic tho
Same here
i like that you described it as a person making you comfortable
I find it so odd that people are supporting this chick..
Lol. Trained psychologist here. VERY few people with ASPD ever let on. Ever. And they definitely won't seek attention for it or announce it, it's literally something to hide. My guess is BPD. (I can only say this since I'm no longer practicing and it's not medical advice.)
I was thinking the same actually lol
"You probably won't like me after this." No. I'm fascinated by you and wish to hear more of your dark mind. And your honesty is refreshing. At least you can admit your love is transactional.
I love how honest she is. 💙
I said it before and I will again .. I’m forever fascinated by the mind of a sociopath and psychopath
Lol I guess it's no different to how people are obsessed with true crime and serial killers
@@darknight2354 but at least i can learn something useful from a sociopath especially for use in love and business
@@imjustsayin34 There aren't many good things you can learn about sociopaths regarding love except how to avoid them. Neurotypicals should not take lessons in love from a sociopath. You will end up damaging yourself and the people you hope to love.
most people dont like good people and find them boring, shame
Dark doesn't equate to evil, and I need your audience to comprehend this. Fierce loyalty, give and take, and safety in presence are all components of love, so I would say that you definitely do love.
"I have a very dark mind, unfortunately, and I wouldn't wouldn't reveal this to many people." *proceeds to make TH-cam short*
I think she means actually saying those dark thoughts…. Like actually going into detail…
💀💀💀
I love your brutal honesty and adore your content!
She's also a narcissist
She did say that.
The field ng of love is shown in many different ways. Love is also a very broad emotion.
You need God in your life.
God can heal you and teach you how to love correctly ❤️
People can have God in their life and still love and feel emotions differently. The world is diverse. There's no right or wrong way to love and telling someone that finding religion will change a literal mental disorder isn't going to magic it away. I believe in God and I pray every day. That won't take away the fact that I have OCD and it's not going to magically change how I feel about people. I am who I am and God knows that I'm doing my best.
@@sociallyundead419 God has the best blue print on how to love ....
He's LOVE
@@mel8469 I think you missed my point.
@@sociallyundead419 think what you want
@@mel8469 give it a rest
I'm not neurotypical either (I have autism and ADHD)
I am capable of feeling empathy and remorse but it looks a little different
For me love is also about a comfort level and I'm also fiercely loyal with the few I love. Whilst I do show my affinity for someone thru transactions I do not expect and equal amount of favors in return. This is because I already view them being a part of life as a positive influence in my life in itself, and thereby the effort I put them and the results I get out of the relationship as equal.
The new brand of pick me I’m quirky girl
?
the new edgy stuff 🙄 maybe not her but impressionable teenagers that throw those terms without doing research, they think antisocial is not having friends when in reality it is a term that can be used to describe criminal behavior.
a disability?
The most honest human ever ? It's so refreshing
Honesty isn't refreshing. It's cruel.
Loving someone is wishing the very best for them, even if it means your ruin.
The extension of friends as self is so true to me wow 👌
You are scary because I have been tricked by a few like you. However, I wish I could be that numbed
I don’t perceive her to be numb, whatsoever. And she’s certainly not dead inside. No way.
I’ve been tricked by Neurotypical people and I have borderline personality disorder
I wanted to share this because it shows that regardless of what people feel inside and regardless of any diagnosis-people may end up seeing others in black-and-white for many reasons. I am probably on the extreme end of empathetic and sensitive, but I make very similar choices in how I see other people. I was once the victim of someone on the narcissistic/aspd spectrum, and it only took once for me to erect major protective boundaries. These have lasted years. I am an introvert and prefer to spend most of my time alone; showing up for others can be exhausting. I feel that if they haven’t had trauma like mine, their emotions are not my problem or mine to take on. If someone betrays me ONCE they are out of my life, and I will never regard them the same. The anger will not pass. I can simultaneously miss them, and be sad about a ruined friendship. But I cannot forgive, either, or give them an ounce of me ever again. Perhaps at some point, there is a bell curve effect in which people who have been victimized adopt some characteristics of the personality types we associate with abuse. If so, it isn’t a bad thing-I will never ever allow my self to victimized again, I will always be confident that I have the right to judge others at a first glance to keep myself safe. The “me first” attitude has helped me immensely for fifteen years. My feelings are deep and my love freely within me, but I am in control of them and they will not cause me to lower my guard. I suspect that people have thought of me as cold and intimidating for this reason. I want my romantic relationships to be business-like and clear, with some professional feeling distance. That ensures respect and loving up to each other’s expectations without becoming emotionally enmeshed.
I love that Kanika is showing that not all people with this diagnosis actively seem to harm others, that there is diversity among people with this diagnosis, and what it is like for her. I love that she is advocating for more woman to adopt a “me first” attitude with strict expectations of others. This is what I did, and will do forever. It has prevented me from being a repeat victim as so many women are. Spot on.
Amiavi - what does the NPD/ASPD spectrum look like. I may be dealing with one and i am worried for her mental health.
I’m divorced with 4 grown children. I “love” them to the best of my ability to love. I don’t think it’s completely unconditional though. I live alone now. They don’t call or reach out to me too much. I wish they did more. So I reach out. But, I feel a little betrayed that as their ONLY FATHER, loving me seems taken for granted. That burns. Because I engage more. I’m EXPECTED to. Maybe I’ve never loved ANYONE unconditionally? What does that mean? I don’t know but you made me stop and think about how I relate. I’m best being completely alone.
could you touch on what its like for you when someone you know, dies?
at first i thought my ex was a narc, but after watching your vids, im starting to wonder him being a sociopath.
he once told me,
"I dont understand why people get so upset when people die. like, when my mom dies im sure ill be upset. but friends? i dont really feel anything. its sad, but people die. thats just what happens."
this completely floored me, as someone who's biggest fear in life is watching my loved ones leave me to walk the Earth alone.
hell, when Alan Rickman died, i cried.
when David Bowie died, i cried.
when a younger classmate that i had barely uttered 3 words to, died, i cried.
i just couldnt imagine NOT being flooded with so many emotions when someone leaves this planet.
its just so confusing.
At least you are honest. I admire your honesty even if I don't always agree with everything you think or say.
Thank you so much for sharing!! ❤
it is so refreshing to know there are more people like that around.
I actually really like this explanation. It seems very much honest and selfaware and describing how your neurodivergent mind works. What intrest me is that it seems like some codependency that is described here only the narcissist/ASP is more aware of how it involves their image and how it can fuel their needs. If that isn't the case the narcissist seem to be able to easily see them failing and cut them of as it isn't benefitial anymore. Where as the partner would also be codependent, and they feel they need to perform to get the breadcrumbs wich is also transactional to get acces to the affection but this is less benefitial in the end. Either way we see 2 sides of the codependency medal. Intresting to think there is a similarly there.
I am really happy to be cured from Herpes virus with #drdodoyi natural herbs. thank you..
The extension of yourself thing actually sounds like a good way to describe how I sometimes feel about friends
as a borderline i understand this far more than i thought i would. i really enjoy knowing that im not really alone in that.
I understand the idea of love being transactional, two people in any kind of relationship should be secure and safe enough in the relationship to take and give from each other. I feel the same way, I have only two people I feel like I can be myself around, but even then its not completely open and vulnerable. I also have had many more people tell me that they didn’t see me as valuable to them, people that should’ve been the ones I could trust the most. Detachment is a very valuable tool to use when dealing with people.