OVERCOMING INSECURITY and LETTING GO of ROMANTIC ATTACHMENT
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 4 ก.พ. 2019
- Most of us are deeply insecure. In this video I share my own experience with personal insecurity and how it manifested in the form of romantic attachment, while also offering some insight into how we can become more secure in ourselves and our relationships.
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Background Music:
"Kallaloe" by Blue Dot Session
(Royalty Free Creative Commons Attribution)
#PersonalGrowth #Confidence #Relationships
It is much easier to be secure by yourself. It is the relation with an intimate partner that brings out the demons.
The thing is when I am not involved with someone, I am really confident about myself and I'm very happy and content with myself. But when I am in a relationship, I become a little clingy unlike the person I really am. It is rather confusing and exhausting.
being in love with the "idea of being in love"
I found out that when I lost the fascination for the physical side of a relationship I discovered not one single woman in the world can control me.
Getting attached to non attachment is also attachment. This has nothing to do with relationships per se. It is about separation. The person will always find something to be insecure about. Liberation is being free of the personal wants. If you can appreciate life, it makes no difference where you live or with whom. if you are romantically involved or not. This will only be the surface of your daily happenings, one of the many wonders of being. That is not to say it is not a nice experience. Life is easier when supported. It is wonderful to share the same non-personalness together. But it doesn't need the relationship as a vehicle. You can share life with life itself. And a good friendship is just as worthy. Being "only" friends doesn't exist. It is not less than any other form of relationship. Important is the underlying current: appreciating everything as a the miracle you are yourself. This compares to nothing.
I feel more alone around people.
Yes after being pushed away, pulled in, over and over and over again, each time you learn to let go of attachment a little more each time, until eventually you release attachment completely. It takes much time, and much strength to let go. My advice is to also not allow the person to push and pull that way. No matter how much you think you love someone that behavior is toxic to your self esteem and self worth. My problem is the person excepts me to play their push and pull but doesn’t want me to fully go. When I do finally “let go” of this person, I will have learned to love myself enough to have the strength to walk away and never look back. That will be my freedom
Yes loneliness can be tough, especially if it is thrust upon you suddenly and unexpectedly, but one day, in the future, you shall feel the exhilarating emancipation that comes with being alone. You shall discover who you really are, whom you have become and you shall be better equipped to enter into another relationship if and when you desire.
I am a 53 year old woman and I can truly relate with you. I always felt incomplete alone. I was in love with the thought of being in love. I realized that I needed to start completing MYSELF. I am so grateful for the time that I have with ME. WE truly need to complete ourselves ❤️ Unless the person who you are with, completely respects who you are and adds to who you are, it's better to be ALONE 🤗
True self love is the most wonderful thing anyone can discover.
i don’t enjoy humans anymore. they just come around to spew their troubled thoughts and feelings needing validation and compassion needing you to touch them and understand them, it’s so boring and leaves you drained and i don’t have enough boundaries for all the crap people throw at me so instead i now focus on doing things that bring me joy and just being happy with myself.
The trick is to find someone who is as attached to you as you are to the other. The idea that one person in a relationship is less interested than the other is the death knell. We get infatuated with qualities that are unique in the other person that are often opposite as in artist vs. engineer, tall vs. short, brown vs. blue eyes, etc. Opposites attract. However, too much game playing goes on because games have become such a part of culture, and I for one hate games. I play for endurance and keeps. I choose to love, the other doesn't, and that is why I get hurt.
'Desire of romantic relationship' means that there is no love but neediness.
I wish I had a friend like you that I could actually talk with that understands.
I am more confident when alone. I have been celibate for 5 years by choice and working on my inner healing, however I still lonely yet afraid of love and untrusting of it. I still struggle with self loathing. Ive come so far yet have so far to go...by the time I reach a sense of wholeness and self love, it will be time to release my spirit from the meat suit...
I was deeply insecure most of my life, and I readily attached to women I was in relationship with, believing that is what I needed to feel good. 3 marriages later, nothing had changed much. Then I met a woman who respected and accepted me, although she never accepted my clinginess, or my "falling in love" with her. It took 4 years of disappointment on my part to finally realize that she was perhaps the most important teacher of my life. We continue to be friends and after resolving most of my attachment disorder by way of her steady love and unwavering kindness and support, we have found some ease, and enjoy each other's company without any expectations that we will ever be in a romantic relationship with each other. It was a hard climb for me, but well worth it, and I am so thankful for her presence in my life. Knowing her has given me a glimpse of what true love really is. Thank you.
Guys, let me tell you something he doesn't talk about. Humans are wired for connection and attachment. We just need to find a person who hasn't got negative believes regarding love, attachment and interdependence.
This spoke volumes to me. I had a relationship similar to yours. He strung me along. Needless to say he went off to school and I left him alone. I decided to stay single and work on my attachment issues. Content like this help me tremendously. I'm learning to love myself. I've been single for a while now I have no desire of getting into a relationship because I know I'm not ready. Thank you.
Music is beautiful, background is beautiful, he is beautiful.
I have come across many videos on TH-cam talking about letting go of attachment. This is the most insightful. It's perfectly explained. I feel much calmer. This is my first comment on any TH-cam channel. Thank you so much!