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I agree that in most cases a consequence is necessary to gauge genuine burning desire if she wants to reschedule a date. However I think in some cases it should be understandable like what if her dad’s in the hospital out of the blue and isn’t expected to be around much longer and she wants to be with him before he dies. Or say she went to hospital unexpectedly for kidney stone or something like that you know?
What if you just got back to her with a one word answer & replied only with, “Sure”. Wouldn’t that relay your indifference to her turning up or not & will either prompt her to pursue you or be annoyed with a shit response if at all??? Rather than getting flack from her if she’s not interested... I’m just curious... Love your episodes, also wonder which cars you’re in on different trips too 😁
I don't understand when people say that woman don't know what they want... the answer is so obvious: They want it all! She might change her mind about what she priorities at the moment, but in the end, she want it all. No wonder they are confuse, broke, drugued and miserable.
Problem is most Men in there 20s are not ready to hear it. My son is getting married soon and his fiancee seems like a nice lass, but as we know best plans and intentions can go sideways. Then your left with the law to clean up the train wreck. We all think people are sugar and spice and all things nice when we are young. Me included.
If she texts you to cancel don’t respond to her and see what she does. I had a girl text me at 6am saying she was gonna be working late and had to cancel. I saw it but didn’t respond. She texted me around 1PM saying she didn’t have to work late after all and could make it. I texted her “hey, I already made plans with someone else but you can come over later tonight with some drinks and we’ll just hangout.” She happily agreed and I made her wait till 11 to come over just to let her know my time is valuable and I’m not gonna stand for being jerked around.
I had a woman cancel on me after a date was planned, her friend didn't show up like she wanted. So she canceled. I deleted her and never spoke to her again. Her father tried to get me to date her again and I said nope. Years later she's a single mother divorced with a beta male provider. Dodged that one.
Last time a girl tried to flake on me, I told her that she wouldn’t get another chance. She was there in a heartbeat and hasn’t done it since. It’s like Rollo says - if it’s not a “fuck yes”, then it’s a no.
@@smiechu47 might be into that kind of woman for some reason. You have to say they have some attractive qualities. However young women WILL have those when they GET old with you AND currently have the youth the old ones lack. So even if you're a MILF guy, in a very LTR you want a young virgin.
Most girls do not know what they need because they confuse what they need with what they want. For example, some teenage girls want to be the most popular girl in HS. She will hang out with the wrong people or people she really does not like because she thinks they will help her image and be more popular. Now take the same stupid girl and push her forward into her twenties and she will probably be the same stupid girl with more useless, unrealistic priorities, and maybe a kid or two in tow. Don't be that tow truck, she will be dead weight on your life because she probably still has not learned to be selfless. There is nothing worse than a selfish person you have to carry.
@@MrPrios1 Let me tell you, all the girls in my high school that were cheerleaders ended up being fucked up in life, with children and very much single and divorced. Every last one of them. And they still live like High School and High School friends are the most important days and relationships formed in their lives.
When I was dating some 35 years ago, I would just cancel them, period. I knew they were not the ones I was looking for. When I was dating my wife she tried to cancel a date with me and I hung up on her. She called me back and apologized. We have been married for 34 years now. If you let anyone walk on you they will always walk on you.
@@exgc12 Back in those days I treated people like they treated me, if I mean nothing to them then they mean nothing to me. I just moved on and did both of us a favor.
@@Ace.0.0.0. And women like decisive men that do what they say they are going to do. That is hard to find nowadays in our young men. Single moms have raised pussies.
@@MrPrios1 Copy that. I have been telling this to others. What you say and what you do must align. If not people will rightly see you as a person who cannot stick with a decision, or as a person who is willfully dishonest AKA a liar. Neither is a good look.
I had one reschedule and apologize, then I just responded with "Sure" and nothing else. I did not text her again and I did not expect her to text me again either. She texted me back later in the week to ask me out and said she would even pay for the dinner and drinks. She actually kept her word and we had fun too. This is how a man knows a woman is into him and in his frame....
Years ago I made two dates with a coworker. She cancelled both. I later ran into her at the bank. She asked me out. I told her I'd call her. I never did. That felt good.
Any woman that truly likes you will make it easy for you to be with. It will be easy to get a date, she'll be easy to be with, won't care what you do on dates, and she'll sleep with you after a few dates. If you feel like you're dragging a freight train through a keyhole, drop her. If she's not friendly, cooperative, submissive, move on. She gets a few dates to vet you, but after that she better be 100% on your team and in your frame. You want someone that's eager to join up and become a "Nation of Two". Why waste your time if she's less than willing.
I try to explain this to guys all the time when they ask how to know if a woman is into them. YOU WILL KNOW. Women will literally create scenarios and situations to get near you, make it socially acceptable to be around you, and everything is easy. This isn't the case with every single girl that may like you, but is not sure if she wants to date you. The ones that truly desire you and are sure they want you will do everything in their power to make it easy for you. I had a girl give me her phone number once for, you know "just in case I needed anything". My car broke down one day and I needed a ride so I called her. She came over, took me to the parts store, brought me back home, said k thanks bye, and I fixed my car. Then I got a call from her, on a hot summer night no less, with her asking how to start a fire and could I come over and show her. I went over there and blew her back out that night. She then confessed she wasn't sure I liked her b/c she thought I was lying about my car just to get near her, but when I actually went and spent money and fixed it she thought "maybe he doesn't like me, I'm trying to make it easy for him and he's not responding". My point is women will say and do anything to make it easy for you when they really, really want the D from you.
That's what I call "truth has been spoken" !!! It's really wise and I'm sad that I discovered this the hard way after wasting a lot of time in my twenties chasing women that weren't interested (it did work sometimes though but the ROI was really low)...It took just one "easy" relationship to make me realize that relationships and sex shouldn't be that hard and I finally accepted the idea that women are the ones who choose their partners and that I had to work more on myself instead of wasting time with women that aren't interested. TLDR : If a woman isn't interested in you GO NEXT ! An interested woman will make your life easier.
No smart respectable woman would give it up after a few dates with any man. Sex leads to pregnancy, and smart women wouldn't do that. Why should women take on that risk? men also need to take responsibility because if you are not willing to stay during that unwanted pregnancy then don't expect women to be pumped and dumped.
@@ginnyfromdablock7551 Sex is how men form emotional connections to women. You may not want to hear that, but its true. If a woman is making you wait date, after date, after date, after date to let you in then we'll likely just move on b/c you're a waste of time. I totally understand wanting to have 2-3 dates before anything physical. You want to get to know what you're working with. By the 3rd date each party should know if they want to proceed or not. If one party doesn't then its likely time to move on b/c no amount of further conversation is going to suddenly change their mind. But lets be real, each gender usually knows within seconds of meeting if they'd sleep with someone simply based on physical attractiveness. If the physical is there, a date is just a chance to show yourself mentally and emotionally. If you fail that part, then there will likely be no sex, but lets not act like women don't know who they want to sleep with as soon as they lay eyes on them. And if you think smart women don't have sex after a few dates then there are tons and tons of dumb women out there. I'd wager that the majority have double digit body counts before they're 20. Hell, I'd wager that a lot of women have slept with more women than me.
Even better is to not even say anything, just like the message and never reply. She’ll reach out sooner then later and you will then have regained a chunk of the power dynamic.
That's fine. Though I honestly like Richs idea because it's a great shit test. If she gets weird like this one did you know to ignore them. If she laughs and says 'deal' AND follows through without an attitude, cool. But if it happened again... Yup, "ok" then that's it lol.
It comes down to options. The more options you have the less you will tolerate from a woman. If you don't have options you will let a woman walk all over you.
Hank Son Right, but not necessarily. Options in this case means also self-respect and a life full of hobbies etc. not only women. Turn the focus away from them and they come automatically, cause it shows "high value", because in her mind you sleep with 100 other women and you are seen as preselected.
You’ll always have one option: Stay single and keep to your OWN schedule! Do what makes YOU happy. Another person should NEVER be the genesis of your happiness. YOU control that!
not always true. I have almost no options and i still don’t tolerate women’s disrespect. Girl didn’t even officially cancel her date with me, she just gave me some flak “idk if i will be able to make it, maybe” she gave me a maybe? Message is in the medium. She don’t care enough. Dropped.
@@li6706 maybe means NO 🚫 97% of the time! Don't be the back 🔥 burner guys! You did the right thing and had self respect and dignity for yourself! If they FLAKE say nothing at all whatsoever too them and ignore them!
I agree in most situations. However if there was an emergency like their dad had a heart attack and was in the hospital and they wanted to be with family since the father might not make it or something like that that I would think would be a reasonable excuse to reschedule a date. Or what if the woman herself had to reschedule because a drunk driver ran her car into ditch while she was on her way home from work or something you know?
@@HhfGs2478 Yeah, but 9/10 times they use these excuses to dodge you and keep you orbiting. They wouldn't use these excuses with Michael B Jordan or Lebron James, and you wouldn't use these excuses for Shakira or Katy Perry.
If a woman asks vaguely to reschedule, I don't even reply. If she's serious about getting together, she'll make the effort and contact me again with a specific date and time. The worst thing you can do if she's trying to flake last minute, is to seem accommodating - it'll make you look like a doormat. Give your attention and energy to the people who want you in their lives, and take it away from the ones who don't.
When they have genuine burning desire and something comes up, they just don’t flake, they will offer another day to meet and try to be flexible with your schedule. 9/10 times this is not the case, they are just a flake and it is best not to waste your time.
If a woman flakes on me...but doesn’t reschedule a date time and place straight away within the next text, then I know she’s not interested and I just ignore messages after that and move on.
I learned this the hard way in the past. The moment she gives a BS excuse for not being able go out and you respond with, “no problem! How about tomorrow? Or next Wednesday?! or whatever you’ve handed over all the power to her and she’s in control and loses all respect for you.
dont even dump them, thats to my mind playing into some bullshit she created. I just move on, its even better, can you imagine how she feels knowing you dont even bother to dump her. it means she doesnt even register as worthwhile to you on any emotional level of bullshit. It sounds harsh, truth usually does! Thats how I say it, it is what it is.
Its just sales tactics 101. You tell a client. I have this Day Free at this time or this Day at this time. If the client hesitates and tells you "I will let you know" Move on to the next one. If the client says "I can't do those days, how bout this day or are you free this day with time?" It shows interest and willing to work with you.
Yeha but in the example he gave she was giving a reasonable reason and suggested another time. If your client offers an alternative date do you tell him "okey, but I will charge you 15% more"?
Asked a girl out, she said yes. We agreed on a day. Day of, she called me like 4pm, said she was going to have a drink with co-workers after work. She'd be like an hour, go home and get ready, then would call me. So I made reservations for 7:30pm. At 9:30pm she called me, said she was heading home to get ready. I said, "Ok, sounds good". She called me at 10:30, said she was ready to go. I said "Ok, sounds good". And then continued my night out my with friends.
Fellas, give her the 'Leonardo DiCaprio test'.. Would she put her friends before Leonardo DiCaprio? Would she make excuses to Leonardo DiCaprio? Would she flake on a date with Leonardo DiCaprio? Etc, you get the idea...
@@brandy5685 It's an example of "women make rules for betas and break rules for alphas". I watched a video recently that said there is a study that proves women are more likely to choose no condoms with alphas, also the chance of STD has no factor in their choice.
Some women flaked on me. Texted me a long reason. Asked for another date. I replied with “ sorry I can’t. Good luck to you”. Simple. She texted me this angry rant on how she’s sick and why I can’t. I never responded. Learn me guys. Learn em. Don’t tolerate it at all. I have a strict policy where if she cancels. She’s finished.
Basically I think the point is that this is a test to see if the woman actually gives a shit about you or if she made up the excuse. If she is willing to pay since she flaked, then she might actually care. If she lashes out then you know she doesn't actually care and then you can ignore her.
Instead of the benefit of the doubt, Rich agrees to go straight to crime and punishment. I'd pass too if I were her. Excuse me for not having genuine burning desire to be punished. Peace out✌
@@Lolatyou332 I see what you mean that it's getting a definite answer one way or the other rather than giving up too soon when there may have been something there.
The best and worst way to punish flaky women is by ghosting them. Their insecurity will get to them when they realize how little and unimportant they are to you.
At age 18 a girl called me to reschedule a date. My older sister's response was--- "if a girl really wants to go out with you, nothing will stand in her way. If she reschedules a date it's because she got a better offer." This was almost 50 years ago and her advice served me well. If I asked a gal for a first date on Friday night and she said she couldn't then but could on Saturday I figured she had a higher priority date and I dropped her like a rock.
I feel like such a gump. . A girl flaked on me 4 times and everytime I was like "it's okay, I'm sure we'll figure something out" about a month later she's posting pregnancy scans of her and her new dude, they're having a baby. Yeah never again
If she wants to reschedule a date without setting a date-&-time or cancels it, a better response would be to ignore her text & delete her number entirely. Remember fellas, have an abundance mindset & always remember that you deserve a woman who has a burning desire for you
The only thing I'm going to say on this topic is, if someone wants to reschedule, you know they're serious when they give you more options. "Hey, I'm working late tonight, I can't catch dinner, let's do drinks tonight instead." Or, "hey, I can't due Friday, can we move dinner to Saturday instead?" If they order a compromise, then they really mean it.
I'm 50 years old now, and I speak from having made all the mistakes. From that vantage I can say don't even respond if a woman cancels. Don't do ANYTHING. Act like nothing happened when she calls or messages you in a few weeks, and let her ask you out.
That's actually the best thing to do I think cause many women just don't know how to react when a HVM sets boundaries like this. Ghosting her probably hammers on the guilt rather than making her defensive.
Assuming a woman has strong, burning desire for you before the first date is not grounded in reality. Female attraction is a volume knob. Strong, confident alpha behavior turns it up. Being reactive and butthurt to her tests turns it down. If she's given reasonable notice, just reply "no worries" and then disappear until you hear from her. Never offer to reschedule if she cancels. If it's last-minute with no offer to reschedule, just ignore her and move on.
Yes you nailed it. That response from that dude was cringe as hell..."oh flaky behavior is a turn off.." that womens vagina instantly went sahara desert dry. Yeah keep it cool, let her come to you....
@@no-stresscat1519 You're kind of right. Women know within the first 5 minutes IF they WOULD sleep with you. Not whether they WANT to sleep with you. Passing their minimum attraction threshold doesn't mean they suddenly have strong, burning desire for you and will drop their entire schedule to go on a date with you. You just have your foot in the door. It's up to you to bring her 5 attraction to a 7 or 8, and there are endless ways to knock it from 5 down to 'no thanks.' Being insecure and butthurt about a reschedule is a great way to do that.
Or just ignore them altogether. So many funner things to do, than waste time on sketchy relationships. I still have so much to accomplish. In 50 years, I'll still be able to have kids. Time's on my side. There's no rush on my end.
This is true. The cancelation of a date means, there is no burning desire at all. It means you are her second choice if not then her third. Good point.
Was seeing this smoke’n hot girl from the same church I attended. On the con side, she had two kids. However, she was doing a very good job of raising them on her own. Even with the two kids she was in demand and guys were interested in her. She was a hotty for sure, a good personality, fun to be around, kept a good house, knew how to cook, honest, and even though she was hot she could be trusted not to cheat. She was looking for a man in her life, made no secret about it, and there was no shortage. Even in her blessed position she was selective about who she would let in. She was the whole package except for the kids. They weren’t good or bad, just normal kids for their age. One girl and one boy. I got along with both of them fine. I liked playing board games with them on the living room floor with their mother also playing along with us. Everything seemed to be going fine and other guys at the church would give me this “you lucky dog” look as I would pass them in the hallway. So, now my boss is having his annual fall festival at his large home/farm. His wife is a schoolteacher and she has all sorts of fun activities planned for the kids that will be coming. She spent money on supplies based on how many kids are coming. My boss has tractor/hay rides planned for the kids, paint ball for the adults, a barbeque, a bond fire, plenty of food and refreshments, a large screen television….. it’s a big event and it’s good to be seen at these sorts of things when they happen. We are allowed to bring a guest and I asked “Karla” if she wanted to join me. She had come to other in office parties and was familiar with most of the people that would be there. She said yes, and the deal was sealed. On the day of, the morning of the festival I call her to verify times and other things. We were expected there around 1430hrs. later that day. Now here comes the sh!t test. She announces to me over the phone that she would like me to come over at the scheduled time but instead of picking her and the kids up she wants me to delay our departure and help her clean her house for about two hours (I suspect that had I gone for this it would be more than two hours) before we leave to go to the festival! I am shocked at this request. She knows how important it is for me to be there and that I had already committed to my boss that I would be there, on time, and would be bringing a case (500 to a case) of paint balls. It came out of left field. When did she know this and why did she wait till now to tell me this? She said she wanted the house to be clean in case the social workers came over to look at the children’s living environment. Really? And you chose now to clean the house and is two hours of cleaning really going to make a difference on an already orderly house? I was calm and told her that I would be glad to come over and pick her and the kids up at the planned time and take them all to the festival as planned without delay but would not be willing to spend any time cleaning up her house or waiting for her to do so. She said, it’s only two hours. I reminded her that I had committed to being at the festival at 1430hrs.. and was responsible for bringing paint balls and other items that are also expected to be there on time. At this time of the year it starts getting dark around 1730hrs.. So, any paintballing would have to be over by then. Being two hours late would put my arrival at 1630hrs. You do the math. She said, well can’t you be two hours late. I said, yes I can but I am not going to do it for the reason of cleaning your house. That’s not a good reason. I politely told her that if she wanted to clean her house it was certainly fine with me and I would make excused for her and her kids not being at the festival and that I was still planning on attending and arriving on time with or without her and her children. She stuttered a little at this and then asked me if she could drive there on her own after cleaning her house and arrive late at the festival. I told her if she wanted to do that it would be fine with me. The bosses house/farm was not close and I started to give her directions. I could tell she wasn’t getting it. She had trouble getting around the city she lived in, much less out in the country. She had already gotten in too deep to change her mind about cleaning her house and instead come with me to the festival. So, when it became painfully obvious she was not going to be able to drive herself out to the festival later in the day, she conceded that she would just stay home and not go. I wished her all the best and we hung up. I went to the festival without her and when asked about where she was, I just said that things came up and she was not able to attend. I know all the guys wanted to see her. As I said, she was smoke’n hot. Well anyways her phone stopped ringing and after about a week she called me and asked if everything was alright. I was very polite and told her that things were fine. I can tell she wanted to ask me why I hadn’t called her, but she didn’t. We had a very cordial conversation and I could also tell she was a little puzzled. On that same call I made no future promises to see or call her, and I could tell she wanted me to. When I would see her in church I would always smile and say hi to her and sometimes she would even stop in the hallway to talk with me. She never asked me to stop over or why I wasn’t calling her or stopping over but I could tell she wanted me to ask her if I could come over sometime or to make plans to go out with her for some activity. Not happening. As far as I was concerned she had given me a sh!t test and I passed and she failed and was now dealing with the consequences of her “test”. Fortunately, I am in a position in life where I don’t have to be clingy. I put girls/orbiters in the friend zone, they don’t put me in the friend zone. With that move she had reached her expiration date, she could easily be replaced, and she knew it. I dropped her faster than a prom dress on prom night. I don’t know why she thought she could play that card with me, but she did, and when she did, and put it on the table, it was set and game.
@@im1who84u I know that your post was made a year ago, but I was curious if this woman got a brain & realised that upon passing said shit test, that it was up to her ask you out or to initiate plans to catch up. That is the whole idea of the shit test. Did she ever ask you out?
@@puppy969 In a sense she did, but honestly I was done with her. She would often talk to me in the church hallways when we would run into each other and ask me to call her, or sometimes I would see her from a distance and she would do that thing with her hand where her pinky finger and thumb would be sticking out and hold it up to her ear with her head tilted, smiling, and mouth the words for me to call her. When other guys saw her do this to me, they would always give me this look like, you lucky dog. She was very pretty and could really have any guy she wanted. She did have those two kids though and that might have made it a harder sell for some guys, including me. The kids seemed to be okay, but they were still two kids that came with her. I was a little unsure about getting involved with her in the first anyway but thought I would "test the waters". I mean she was kinda flirting with me so I thought why not? I wasn't really emotionally locked into her and still a little jittery about it all anyway. When she pulled that stunt, that made up my mind for me. I was outta here. This happened some years ago and I have seen her with other guys off and on since then and I am assuming they are "dating" her. I was always happy for her in the kids when I saw her with what seemed to be a nice guy that was financially set in life, but she is still single and no one ever wifed her up. At this point I don't see it happening now. Her son graduated high school and joined the military. Her daughter who looks very much like her mother is now an older teenager, or if you wish, a young adult. Just another story in The Naked City.
She cancels once. Everyone has things that come up. No big deal She cancels a second time. She has found something better to do She cancels the third date. You don't value your own time
I think the best thing to do when a woman flakes is to simply not say anything and don't respond. No need to call her, no need to even mention that she flaked, just give her absolute silence. It's the perfect punishment/consequence because women can't stand being ignored. If you show that it didn't bother you because you're too busy to care, she will likely blow up your phone which shows she has that desire for you; it may even increase the desire.
I do that with my daughter's. If they are late for our father-daughter dates I order my meal, eat and leave. This is to teach them to respect other people's time and to teach them the consequences of narcissism and importance of values. If my daughter's value other things, events, people above their father knowing how difficult it is to schedule these dad-daughter times then when they need me I won't be available. Consequence drive behaviours. Women demand respect, but don't want to give it. Hopefully this will teach my daughter's a lesson for when they date men and get dumped. They need to look at themselves and be accountable for their actions and behaviours.
That’s……….one way to try to teach your daughters. I guess time will tell if it works. I’m tempted to say no, since they are your daughters and you probably should have taught them that lesson already but maybe I’m wrong. I’m not being a smart ass. I’m really into the outcome. Being into psychology as much as I am, and it being their father using a dating maneuver on them though I have my doubts.
@@readingthebible5413 Nothing teaches lessons better than consequences. My wife does the same with my daughter. I'm a qualified Master Coach in People and Business Performance and studied psychology, but you don't need my level of qualifications to understand that consequences change or reinforce behaviours. If you read the consequence scriptures in the bible then you would know that God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are great practioners of the principle. It works.
You were not there for kids when they were children to teach them respect? They r with you because they can’t stand you. They are showing their disrespect to you because of what you did to them when they were children. Probably not being there like a dad should be. Don’t pat yourself too much on the back for being an absent father. Respect is taught when children are young and now you think you’re a great dad of the world. Loser.
yah that's what I was thinking who the fuck uses that word, lol! It's like a grown man calling someone else "cupcake" and thinking they got one over on them.
Had a similar situation. I replied, “Very well. I like steak and shrimp.” Her reply, “ Yes Daddy.” Next time she came over. She showed up with a Whole Foods bag with steak, shrimp, and red potatoes. Then she cooked it all for me👌🏼
Nice one! But C'mon dude, we all know it was Dinner and "half a movie".😏 NxtDay- Friend: So how'd it go? Her: just dinner and a movie. Friend: yeah? I watched that. How did it end? Her: 😳
Failing to punish bad behavior only invites more of it. Valuable lesson in all relationships. Seems like a lot of modern dating problems stem from our own desire to believe that the other person will be a good match for us (which is perfectly understandable), but what we should be focused on is ruthlessly screening for red flags to avoid wasting time with losers. Only become invested once you know you're onto something good.
What i would do is give her the benefit of the doubt and not text her until she texts me. If she texts me i'll go out with her, but if it happens a 2nd time, imma go bye bye
I can count on one hand the number of times where a woman agreed to buying the first round or a meal because she flaked. Cooperative women are hard to find.
stop trying to find them, you never will. Its a fucking chinese finger trap my boy, okay? You have to understand that its gotta be the other way around, you have to let people come to you when you get your stuff in order.
I think girls get angry towards some guys who respond like that, because they've established the guy as not alpha. But because its an alpha response, it kinda throws them into a state of frustration as they don't feel the guy should be allowed to act that way. Its like the guy suddenly presents a threat, that he might actually trick a member of the sisterhood into believing he's alpha, despite, possibly being beta, and only good for resources, not breeding.
Had a hiking date planned with this chick. It was planned for about a week. The morning of, she said she can’t make it because she forgot it was Election Day. At the time that wasn’t a good enough excuse for me. Turns out she had a boyfriend the whole time we were talking.
here's a deeper layer that most idiots miss, when she doesn't flake and follow through with the date, pay attention if she spends a disrespectful amount of time on her phone while on date. Even better, if she always put her phone face down
You gotta show a girl that she ain't shit. Acting eager for a rescheduled date is a turn off wether she was into you or not. If she wasn't into you, it's embarrassing and you'll get ghosted.. If she was into you, now it appears like you're stuck for options and desperate
I hear you, but logic needs to prevail. You’ve got to put in some effort and willingness to empathize if there’s a logical set of circumstances. Life happens, and there are legitimate reasons why it could happen. I think that holding too firmly to your own rigidity could also be indicative of a character flaw. It can be difficult to navigate.
Facts man. Had a girl flake on me, ignored her and negged her when I saw her. She texted me later and I didn't respond. I'll get to her later, she's put herself in her own place, and that is in the back of the line.
The consequences if someone tries to reschedule on me are 1)Smile, say 'no problem' then walk away, don't look back, don't offer any other option. 2)Go about your life, get another date.... I have never not had the 're-scheduler' not reach out again..... Some a day later some months later but they ALWAYS do. 👍
I met a woman on a social media platform not too long ago and same thing. We texted on the phone, the app and had finally set up a date after 3 weeks. She didn't work and had two kids. She had the nerve to cancel. I kept texting her the rest of the day and that evening. The following days I slowly started texting less and then finally a week later I stopped altogether. This day in age makes it extremely difficult to find a woman to text, talk to and date. I'm 45 and honestly starting to lose hope I'll find someone.
Sorry Bro, she did all this to get rid of you. If it took 3 weeks to set the date, you were not her first choice, nor her 2nd. It's a good thing for you because a woman w/no job and 2 kids = trouble, financial and otherwise. And you'd always have the feeling in the back of your head that she might be with you just for your resources. One suggestion - keep texts to a minimum, using to set up dates. If she cancels, don't harass her just move on.
When I get a reschedule request I don't even bother responding. Delete the numbers. It's best to send her a text asking who is texting next time she is texting
Anyone with sons should bookmark this channel and from the first time a son asks about females, go through everything here systematically. What I would have given to have someone teach me stuff like this when I was 19 rather than figure out this stuff the hard way and waste precious soul energy. Thank you for your service, kind man I have never met
Dated this one chic for a while. Long enough thst she had met the fam. Couple weeks before Easter she promised my grandmother she would make a ham for the gathering. Easter day she calls(late) says come get the ham i gotta finish blah blah blah. So i go to the house(very close by) she hands me a pan with a fukin raw ham in it, and starts giving me instructions on how to cook it. So i look at her smile walk over to the trash can dumped it in, and never spoke to her again...
What most men don't seem to realize is that beauty is not like the finest wine or whiskey that will age well. It's more like youth, yogurt, red meat or milk. It will smell like rotten garbage by tomorrow morning.
I’m at a point in my life where I have zero tolerance for cancelled / rescheduled dates. Of course there are real emergencies, I get that - but in general, this absolutely demonstrates low value and a lack of respect for your time.
One more story LOL 😂 I had another girl I was seeing that would occasionally be tardy, so the one time when we made plans I waited about a half an hour, she said she was on her way and I left, she got to the destination only to say "I'm here", to which I replied, "I'm home, fuck off". Days went by and I didn't text her, eventually she texted me....... Don't let women walk on you no matter how high their position is. In her particular case she had high standings (job wise) and was very f****** attractive.
being flaky or late is disrespectful: in relationship or not. Because someone took time and money and prepared and scheduled around that activity, and to cancel last minute or make them wait habitually (unless it's emergency) is inconsiderate and unacceptable. If someone doesnt respect your time, they are not worth your time. Period.
In my opinion you're 100% correct .. when I was a young man whenever a girl canceled on me I just wouldn't call them again .. my very very best girlfriends I ever had would call me after a few days and apologize for canceling and ask if they could take me out .. Those girls are definitely interested .. this was around 40 years ago since I'm now in my 60s but I can tell you from experience that's the way to live
The problem is when you get with an online girl she’s constantly getting attention from men that will bend their schedules around and pay for dates. So when you try to hold these type of women accountable they will say no. Which is ok, but just a fact
A great deal depends on the particulars of the situation. E.g.: 1) She started a new job two months ago. Her boss told her Tuesday that she's going to a business conference leaving Thursday night, returning Wednesday night. She called me Tuesday within minutes of being told about the travel. I'm ok with that. 2) She is a Doctor, lawyer, or LEO. She calls me an hour before the date to let me know that she got called to tend to a patient/lead a team defending her law firm's biggest client/investigate a murder. I'm ok with that.
Why are you on this channel then, you've made up your mind, go about your life alone. Some of us like to get laid, but at the same time know not to get into serious relationships.
you probably hear this all the time. you changed my life and the life of my son forever. ive always was told I was a beta even by the last person I ever expected, she will remain in the shadow. now I have the drive to start not one , not two but three businesses. this is more about women. it's about self confidence to succeed in whatever I do and never quit thank you.
You know, I would definitely respect a response with a consequence because it demonstrates confidence and emphasizes the importance of your time. I am a woman married to a top caliber man and he respectfully but firmly upholds consequences from the first date onward. He impressed me by being straightforward with his boundaries and being married to him has really helped me become a more straightforward person as well. If it helps, I consider myself an honest, traditionally feminine woman and have been sought after for reasons beyond just good looks. I do not have social media accounts and am extremely respectful of my high caliber husband so I do not engage with other men so this scenario is hypothetical to how I was before marriage. If I had to cancel a date with someone I was looking forward to, #1 I would apologize profusely and suggest a different day and time so that the next date is solidified. I would also try to make it up to the guy by offering to make dinner or a picnic or something. I was never a "go out drinking" girl and tbh it will be more difficult to find a nice girl in a bar. Basically, I believe a man should uphold his standards and expect a classy and appropriate answer from his potential date. If she throws a fit that easily, it is definitely a red flag.
I’ve been out of the game for a while but if one person in a relationship reschedules or cancels, the unspoken rule is that the person who tries to reschedule or cancels has the responsibility to go an extra two miles to affirm genuine interest. Otherwise move on and don’t get attached because if you chase the reschedule, you’ve set the dynamic in the relationship as the one without power
Love this. I recently came to this conclusion on my own just recently, actually. A girl I met online canceled the morning-of our date, citing her dad, whose birthday was a day before, wanted to celebrate the day of our hangout. She mentioned rescheduling, but I didn’t want to give her another day the following week. I’d turned down another girl because I had this planned with the one who cancelled. So I told her to get back in touch with me in a couple of weeks. So my “punishment” was putting her in time-out lol. She said she would so we’ll see. But I’m never reaching out or bringing up getting together again. If I don’t hear from her again, I’ll see it as a win. No room for flakey bitches in my life. Also, the censorship is bullshit. Toxic feminism, love that phrase. Cheers
You didn’t punish her at all Mr. virtue signaler Stupid Ukrainian flag guy. She was out and about doing her thing. You were probably low value to her so that’s why she canceled in the first place. Don’t think too you’re so high and mighty. Ur Nothing
Yea, I agree. If there is a really good reason why they had to reschedule then that's fine. We just gotta be aware if were getting played and test to see if the woman is genuinely interested.
@@AdventureEpic exactly. This is the main reason I don't date single mums if I'm honest. The whole thing about raising another man's kids is irrelevant if you're just spinning plates but the cancelling at the last minute is a real pain in the ass. It's fine their kids come first I respect that but I have better things to do that waste a Saturday evening being stood up
If "everyone gets a second chance" that gives them an excuse to keep constantly F-ing up "that first time" with every single person they encounter in life. Not a good attitude to take.
@@Mage64 I don't really date that often to be honest. I've lost a lot of interest in it. It's about having standards I think. You need to have intuition I think
My father taught me that: A- Treat people the way you’d want to be treated. B- Leave things better that you found them. Two great simple lessons that show/grow your character.
@@TheCycloneTrooper sure it does, I’ve always treated my wife the way I would expect to be treated, been working for 15 years. Every girlfriend in the distant past that I left I’m pretty sure I left them better off then when I found them. 😂
I absolutely love your work Mr Cooper. I've been saying stuff like this for years and was constantly called a misogynist for it. I've been abandoned by the opposite sex more times than I care to count for it too. Never stop doing what you are doing.
When they do that to me, I just block them from my phone. I came to the conclusion (and he said it on the video) that they cancel or reschedule because they’re going out with another guy or they don’t have the burning desire so they’ll find something else more important for them.
When she re-schedules, just say, "Thanks and goodbye." IF she really had to take her mother to the morgue SHE'LL aggressively re-schedule. But guys, MOST of the time she thinks she's got an upgrade opportunity, so in your mind you're already #2 or #3 at best.
Any girl who lashes out like that is not someone you want in your life in any capacity. If she were actually just innocently busy, and wanted to truly meet up, she would respond something like “I’m sorry you feel that way I’m sure it does look bad but I do genuinely want to see you.” She wouldn’t freak the hell out. People get extremely defensive when they are correctly called out on BS.
in the past I would've handled this very differently. she did him a favor. when you realize there's another one waiting for you around the corner, making her deal with consequences or just letting her go becomes very easy.
In the first date, i dont think there should be a quote and quote ''punishment''. I would be more interested if she is giving another date, like ''sorry im busy can we meet the next day?''. Thats excusable. She really can be busy at the moment. The worse comes if she doesnt even mentions a rescadule date
Woah?! This just happened to me today! I told her.. "I'm not about people bailing on me multiple times, just saying" her response was.. "I don't think I'm in a social mood anyways and don't want to lead you on." Then she deflected and blamed it on getting called back to work and being too tired to meet up afterwards.
If it happens again, don't even give her the courtesy of a reply. This rule applies to the 1st time she does it, don't give her the chance to do it to you "multiple" times! Delete number and move on to the next..
I understand sometimes life can happen. There's a huge difference between "I have to work, let's try to reschedule vs "I have to work. If you want you can come over to watch a movie afterwards. I can order pizza." One wants to see you. The other doesn't.
For me personally, 1 strike equals 3 strikes. First impressions are everything and if she cancels out on the first date, she doesn't even deserve a reply. She's showing you from the get go who she really is. I just block her number and forget about her. The only way I'll reply is if she tries to text from another phone to get around the block placed on her. Her effort in that case deserves a response.
I always had this idea, when I want to meet a girl I make some time abailable, no matter what. So, if she reschedules she is not that commited. Giving her your preferences what she can do for you is a good way to say: "Okay, I give you one more chance." Otherwise it's a waste of time.
Was single until I was 32 and loved my life. Now married 25 years. Key to happiness? Boundaries. I compromise on most things and don't put my marriage at risk. But I established boundaries that are non negotiable. Couple of cigars a week with a buddy. Few single malts. Peeing standing up. When you set a boundary expect push back. Don't get angry. Don't over explain or justify. Just act. She will come around. And if she doesn't that's ok too. I don't require her agreement on everything that I do.
U hit the nail on the head with why his account got banned. The word “punish” instantly got a negative reaction out of people before he even said anything. Honestly in the era of click bait it was the only word that truly fit the narrative and would get tons of views.
Just came across your account yesterday, everything you say is so spot on with the direction I've been leading myself on my own and I just bought your book, already feel all the bullshit oozing and dissipating from my brain, thank you for your clarity, work, and leadership!
When you plan for something, but have to cancel it, if you care about them, then you'd want to try to make it up to them. The fact that she reacted in the way that she did to him suggesting a way for her to make it up to him makes it perfectly clear that she didn't respect him or his time and didn't see either of them as valuable.
When I was young and dating in high school in the early 1970s, I had one basic rule. Whoever I was dating, I told them when I come to pick you up..... be ready. You've got 15 minutes after I show up. If you're not ready in 15 minutes, I'm out the door, as I'm not going to sit there and talk to your mother and father be "interrogated" while you're still screwing around for an hour getting ready, when you knew what time the date was. Some girls got pissed off when I left, others learned quickly. I taught my son the same basic rule.
@@uptamistik Yeah, it does. Self respect and respect for other people's time never went out of style, beta. It's the entire point of setting a time in the first place.
Totally right man, if she freaks over that she'll freak out 10 times worse later in the relationship. People will never do or say anything you don't invite them to do, If they do it more than once it's because you have taught them it's ok or they're just poor quality people and not worth your time. Valuable and intelligent people don't engage in yelling, fighty, or destructive behavior. I dated a girl for a year and a half, early on she flipped one time I told her the next time she did that she was gone my life is a drama free zone and I don't put up with that. A year later she got comfortable/stupid and flipped out. I told her on the spot door key on the dresser, grab your shit and never come back. Her face immediately change to "OH SHIT" I pointed to the stairs no talking it out, no debating, no explaining, nothing, she knew the expectation of behavior and chose not to comply. I had to block her on all channels because she kept blowing me up begging me to take her back. Usually if a girl tries to flake I don't even bother responding just hard next.
Just tell her "no worries, totally understand" go to the gym and find somebody to take out same time instead. When she circles back, take the date! Don't discuss what you did instead, re aim the convo back onto the fun date with her. DO NOT REVEAL what you did.
Hey Rich, just a question and request. Here in Australia it is very common for a woman to just one day change the locks and you can't enter the home cos she has also got a restraining order, (75% have been confirmed to be false in Australia). The man is on the streets having to find somewhere to go! Some sleep in their cars, some in their office, or relatives. There is no outcry or tears shed for these men. Does this happen in Canada or the states? Can you have a discussion, or suggest how you navigate such problems or see them coming? Cheers
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High recommend this book 📚
Rich what's your opinion on flaking on women? A lot of men have talked about it from the perspective of keeping them on the hook
I agree that in most cases a consequence is necessary to gauge genuine burning desire if she wants to reschedule a date. However I think in some cases it should be understandable like what if her dad’s in the hospital out of the blue and isn’t expected to be around much longer and she wants to be with him before he dies. Or say she went to hospital unexpectedly for kidney stone or something like that you know?
What if you just got back to her with a one word answer & replied only with, “Sure”. Wouldn’t that relay your indifference to her turning up or not & will either prompt her to pursue you or be annoyed with a shit response if at all??? Rather than getting flack from her if she’s not interested... I’m just curious... Love your episodes, also wonder which cars you’re in on different trips too 😁
Hi, any plan on audiobook for the unplugged alpha???
Scientists recently discovered what a woman wants.
But then she changed her mind.
Lol highly underrated comment 😄
I don't understand when people say that woman don't know what they want... the answer is so obvious: They want it all!
She might change her mind about what she priorities at the moment, but in the end, she want it all. No wonder they are confuse, broke, drugued and miserable.
OOOOOOOH laaaaaaaaaawd u got me on this one ...aaaaaaawesome!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lmfao! Nice!
LOL! Best comment I’ve seen today!
People are treated how they let themselves be treated. Wish I had advice like this in my 20s.
Yes. We get what we tolerate. Do not allow yourself to be a doormat.
"Hey hey hey; bitches runnin' wild."
Problem is most Men in there 20s are not ready to hear it. My son is getting married soon and his fiancee seems like a nice lass, but as we know best plans and intentions can go sideways. Then your left with the law to clean up the train wreck. We all think people are sugar and spice and all things nice when we are young. Me included.
@@Ace.0.0.0. ikr. Wish I could turn the clock back over the doormat issue. I dont put up with that shit anymore
1000%
If she texts you to cancel don’t respond to her and see what she does. I had a girl text me at 6am saying she was gonna be working late and had to cancel. I saw it but didn’t respond. She texted me around 1PM saying she didn’t have to work late after all and could make it. I texted her “hey, I already made plans with someone else but you can come over later tonight with some drinks and we’ll just hangout.” She happily agreed and I made her wait till 11 to come over just to let her know my time is valuable and I’m not gonna stand for being jerked around.
I hate mind games and shit but i would recommend exactly what you did as excellent advice.
Solid game.
Well played brother 🤘😎🤘
My Guy✌️
Thats a good one will add it to my Arsenal thanx for Posting
I had a woman cancel on me after a date was planned, her friend didn't show up like she wanted. So she canceled. I deleted her and never spoke to her again. Her father tried to get me to date her again and I said nope. Years later she's a single mother divorced with a beta male provider. Dodged that one.
Lol. Did the baby's daddy have a manbun?
Lmfaooo you dodged a bullet 🤣
🙏
so she was planning on bringing a friend with her on the date??
😂😂😂😂😂
Last time a girl tried to flake on me, I told her that she wouldn’t get another chance. She was there in a heartbeat and hasn’t done it since. It’s like Rollo says - if it’s not a “fuck yes”, then it’s a no.
Rollo married a single mom older than him.
@@smiechu47 might be into that kind of woman for some reason. You have to say they have some attractive qualities. However young women WILL have those when they GET old with you AND currently have the youth the old ones lack. So even if you're a MILF guy, in a very LTR you want a young virgin.
@@smiechu47 Source?
Most girls do not know what they need because they confuse what they need with what they want. For example, some teenage girls want to be the most popular girl in HS. She will hang out with the wrong people or people she really does not like because she thinks they will help her image and be more popular. Now take the same stupid girl and push her forward into her twenties and she will probably be the same stupid girl with more useless, unrealistic priorities, and maybe a kid or two in tow. Don't be that tow truck, she will be dead weight on your life because she probably still has not learned to be selfless. There is nothing worse than a selfish person you have to carry.
@@MrPrios1 Let me tell you, all the girls in my high school that were cheerleaders ended up being fucked up in life, with children and very much single and divorced. Every last one of them. And they still live like High School and High School friends are the most important days and relationships formed in their lives.
When I was dating some 35 years ago, I would just cancel them, period. I knew they were not the ones I was looking for. When I was dating my wife she tried to cancel a date with me and I hung up on her. She called me back and apologized. We have been married for 34 years now. If you let anyone walk on you they will always walk on you.
People respect strength. And you put yourself first. Good on ya!
When I read you hung up, for a moment I could hear the echo of that phone smash still hanging around.
@@exgc12 Back in those days I treated people like they treated me, if I mean nothing to them then they mean nothing to me. I just moved on and did both of us a favor.
@@Ace.0.0.0. And women like decisive men that do what they say they are going to do. That is hard to find nowadays in our young men. Single moms have raised pussies.
@@MrPrios1 Copy that. I have been telling this to others. What you say and what you do must align. If not people will rightly see you as a person who cannot stick with a decision, or as a person who is willfully dishonest AKA a liar. Neither is a good look.
I had one reschedule and apologize, then I just responded with "Sure" and nothing else. I did not text her again and I did not expect her to text me again either. She texted me back later in the week to ask me out and said she would even pay for the dinner and drinks. She actually kept her word and we had fun too. This is how a man knows a woman is into him and in his frame....
Did you knock boots with her?
@Hd34 Hd34 it depends.
@@fauxbro1983 Yes, I should have been more specific than just "we had fun", I blew her back out :D
@@gman8042 lul
Been there, man. Had one pay for a hotel. She paid for a holiday not long after as well.
Years ago I made two dates with a coworker. She cancelled both. I later ran into her at the bank. She asked me out. I told her I'd call her. I never did. That felt good.
@@a.j.9727 This is over 20 years ago. My check was drawn on a bank that had a local branch. My employer didn't offer direct deposit.
Any woman that truly likes you will make it easy for you to be with. It will be easy to get a date, she'll be easy to be with, won't care what you do on dates, and she'll sleep with you after a few dates. If you feel like you're dragging a freight train through a keyhole, drop her. If she's not friendly, cooperative, submissive, move on. She gets a few dates to vet you, but after that she better be 100% on your team and in your frame. You want someone that's eager to join up and become a "Nation of Two". Why waste your time if she's less than willing.
I try to explain this to guys all the time when they ask how to know if a woman is into them. YOU WILL KNOW. Women will literally create scenarios and situations to get near you, make it socially acceptable to be around you, and everything is easy. This isn't the case with every single girl that may like you, but is not sure if she wants to date you. The ones that truly desire you and are sure they want you will do everything in their power to make it easy for you.
I had a girl give me her phone number once for, you know "just in case I needed anything". My car broke down one day and I needed a ride so I called her. She came over, took me to the parts store, brought me back home, said k thanks bye, and I fixed my car. Then I got a call from her, on a hot summer night no less, with her asking how to start a fire and could I come over and show her. I went over there and blew her back out that night. She then confessed she wasn't sure I liked her b/c she thought I was lying about my car just to get near her, but when I actually went and spent money and fixed it she thought "maybe he doesn't like me, I'm trying to make it easy for him and he's not responding". My point is women will say and do anything to make it easy for you when they really, really want the D from you.
Yeah just had a few plates drop recently picked up a few more...
That's what I call "truth has been spoken" !!! It's really wise and I'm sad that I discovered this the hard way after wasting a lot of time in my twenties chasing women that weren't interested (it did work sometimes though but the ROI was really low)...It took just one "easy" relationship to make me realize that relationships and sex shouldn't be that hard and I finally accepted the idea that women are the ones who choose their partners and that I had to work more on myself instead of wasting time with women that aren't interested.
TLDR : If a woman isn't interested in you GO NEXT ! An interested woman will make your life easier.
No smart respectable woman would give it up after a few dates with any man. Sex leads to pregnancy, and smart women wouldn't do that. Why should women take on that risk? men also need to take responsibility because if you are not willing to stay during that unwanted pregnancy then don't expect women to be pumped and dumped.
@@ginnyfromdablock7551 Sex is how men form emotional connections to women. You may not want to hear that, but its true. If a woman is making you wait date, after date, after date, after date to let you in then we'll likely just move on b/c you're a waste of time.
I totally understand wanting to have 2-3 dates before anything physical. You want to get to know what you're working with. By the 3rd date each party should know if they want to proceed or not. If one party doesn't then its likely time to move on b/c no amount of further conversation is going to suddenly change their mind.
But lets be real, each gender usually knows within seconds of meeting if they'd sleep with someone simply based on physical attractiveness. If the physical is there, a date is just a chance to show yourself mentally and emotionally. If you fail that part, then there will likely be no sex, but lets not act like women don't know who they want to sleep with as soon as they lay eyes on them.
And if you think smart women don't have sex after a few dates then there are tons and tons of dumb women out there. I'd wager that the majority have double digit body counts before they're 20. Hell, I'd wager that a lot of women have slept with more women than me.
If they flake: "don't worry about it". Delete. Next...
This is GOLD
This is what i do.
If they flake, don't date
Don't delete. Put the word flakey after her name. That way you can decide if your going to answer if she calls you in 3 months.
@christopherf8160 I delete it so if they ever text I ask who is this? 🫠
When she texts you to reschedule just respond with “ok” and never text her again.
Even better is to not even say anything, just like the message and never reply. She’ll reach out sooner then later and you will then have regained a chunk of the power dynamic.
@@badass1g true.
@@badass1g Touchet
If she cancels and doesn't try to reschedule just reply "OK".
If she replies and tries to reschedule just reply "Sure we can, but first rounds on you"
That's fine. Though I honestly like Richs idea because it's a great shit test. If she gets weird like this one did you know to ignore them. If she laughs and says 'deal' AND follows through without an attitude, cool. But if it happened again... Yup, "ok" then that's it lol.
It comes down to options. The more options you have the less you will tolerate from a woman. If you don't have options you will let a woman walk all over you.
Hank Son
Right, but not necessarily. Options in this case means also self-respect and a life full of hobbies etc. not only women. Turn the focus away from them and they come automatically, cause it shows "high value", because in her mind you sleep with 100 other women and you are seen as preselected.
You’ll always have one option: Stay single and keep to your OWN schedule! Do what makes YOU happy. Another person should NEVER be the genesis of your happiness. YOU control that!
Or you can have no option and you don't really care if you single or not
not always true. I have almost no options and i still don’t tolerate women’s disrespect. Girl didn’t even officially cancel her date with me, she just gave me some flak “idk if i will be able to make it, maybe” she gave me a maybe? Message is in the medium. She don’t care enough. Dropped.
@@li6706 maybe means NO 🚫 97% of the time! Don't be the back 🔥 burner guys! You did the right thing and had self respect and dignity for yourself! If they FLAKE say nothing at all whatsoever too them and ignore them!
Introduce consequences. Be the daddy they never had.
😀😀😀👍
Gold 👌
I agree in most situations. However if there was an emergency like their dad had a heart attack and was in the hospital and they wanted to be with family since the father might not make it or something like that that I would think would be a reasonable excuse to reschedule a date. Or what if the woman herself had to reschedule because a drunk driver ran her car into ditch while she was on her way home from work or something you know?
@@HhfGs2478 The made up scenarios that you talk about appear VERY rarely in reality, they represent the exception to the rule.
@@HhfGs2478 Yeah, but 9/10 times they use these excuses to dodge you and keep you orbiting. They wouldn't use these excuses with Michael B Jordan or Lebron James, and you wouldn't use these excuses for Shakira or Katy Perry.
If a woman asks vaguely to reschedule, I don't even reply. If she's serious about getting together, she'll make the effort and contact me again with a specific date and time. The worst thing you can do if she's trying to flake last minute, is to seem accommodating - it'll make you look like a doormat. Give your attention and energy to the people who want you in their lives, and take it away from the ones who don't.
When they have genuine burning desire and something comes up, they just don’t flake, they will offer another day to meet and try to be flexible with your schedule. 9/10 times this is not the case, they are just a flake and it is best not to waste your time.
Yes, this! So few people cancel and then RESCHEDULE. They just cancel.
That's a sad sad reality.
If a woman flakes on me...but doesn’t reschedule a date time and place straight away within the next text, then I know she’s not interested and I just ignore messages after that and move on.
I learned this the hard way in the past. The moment she gives a BS excuse for not being able go out and you respond with, “no problem! How about tomorrow? Or next Wednesday?! or whatever you’ve handed over all the power to her and she’s in control and loses all respect for you.
Just like with any sales, people say no but it is mostly to test your sense of your own self respect.
If they are flakey, just dump them.
dont even dump them, thats to my mind playing into some bullshit she created. I just move on, its even better, can you imagine how she feels knowing you dont even bother to dump her. it means she doesnt even register as worthwhile to you on any emotional level of bullshit. It sounds harsh, truth usually does! Thats how I say it, it is what it is.
I would just ghost them, her flakiness is grounds to go "no contact".
Its just sales tactics 101. You tell a client. I have this Day Free at this time or this Day at this time. If the client hesitates and tells you "I will let you know" Move on to the next one. If the client says "I can't do those days, how bout this day or are you free this day with time?" It shows interest and willing to work with you.
Yeah
Yeha but in the example he gave she was giving a reasonable reason and suggested another time.
If your client offers an alternative date do you tell him "okey, but I will charge you 15% more"?
@@MrSeuchenratte why are you selling something
@@ikeskifan because we are always selling something.
Nikola Because that time could be used to sell it someone else
If she cancels without mentioning rescheduling, walk away. Simple as that.
I have a 2 strikes rule for this.
It doesn't matter if your a friend or love interest.
If you miss twice back to back you can lose my number.
Then, I have a three-strikes rule.
@@williamahn70932 strikes or 3 strikes ?
🤔🤔
Asked a girl out, she said yes. We agreed on a day. Day of, she called me like 4pm, said she was going to have a drink with co-workers after work. She'd be like an hour, go home and get ready, then would call me. So I made reservations for 7:30pm.
At 9:30pm she called me, said she was heading home to get ready. I said, "Ok, sounds good". She called me at 10:30, said she was ready to go. I said "Ok, sounds good".
And then continued my night out my with friends.
Lmao whatt😂
😂😂😂
That's like trolling a troll. LMAO!
Fellas, give her the 'Leonardo DiCaprio test'..
Would she put her friends before Leonardo DiCaprio?
Would she make excuses to Leonardo DiCaprio?
Would she flake on a date with Leonardo DiCaprio?
Etc, you get the idea...
Are you Leonardo DiCaprio?
@@brandy5685 No... Just making the point that women just make excuses etc for the guys they have no real desire for.
@@brandy5685 It's an example of "women make rules for betas and break rules for alphas". I watched a video recently that said there is a study that proves women are more likely to choose no condoms with alphas, also the chance of STD has no factor in their choice.
@@brandy5685 the husband of a woman has to look like the most alpha man on earth to her. Since they are illogical, this is possible.
@@brandy5685 is she a girl Leonardo DiCaprio would want to date and reschedule? ... you see..
Some women flaked on me. Texted me a long reason. Asked for another date. I replied with “ sorry I can’t. Good luck to you”. Simple. She texted me this angry rant on how she’s sick and why I can’t. I never responded. Learn me guys. Learn em. Don’t tolerate it at all. I have a strict policy where if she cancels. She’s finished.
Someone who flakes on you has already wasted your time so why waste even more time trying to punish them?
Basically I think the point is that this is a test to see if the woman actually gives a shit about you or if she made up the excuse.
If she is willing to pay since she flaked, then she might actually care. If she lashes out then you know she doesn't actually care and then you can ignore her.
@1Nation that's a good point. If you check them maybe they'll second guess and re-evaluate.
Instead of the benefit of the doubt, Rich agrees to go straight to crime and punishment. I'd pass too if I were her. Excuse me for not having genuine burning desire to be punished. Peace out✌
@@corichang See Lolatyou332's comment above yours. This.
@@Lolatyou332 I see what you mean that it's getting a definite answer one way or the other rather than giving up too soon when there may have been something there.
Women have a plethora of men to choose from. Gotta know I'm her first choice and not some sortof backup plan.
Assume that if a girl is talking to you that she's also talking to 3 other guys
Not 3 but 20
Possibly hundreds
How to know you are not her #1 ? If you are not a 6-6-6 guy and your name is not chad thundercock then you are not her first choise
dude all this bs talk...unless you are brad pitt, you are NOT her first choice. Stop the delusions
The best and worst way to punish flaky women is by ghosting them. Their insecurity will get to them when they realize how little and unimportant they are to you.
Opening the chat or only seeing the notification in your phone? Which one is ghosting?
@@IkanaMaskedMan Leave them on seen
Drives em insane
lose the mask dude
@@stoneroses1989 I already have. Now, I have a cold, but not COVID. The back of my nasal cavity is feeling scratchy.
At age 18 a girl called me to reschedule a date. My older sister's response was--- "if a girl really wants to go out with you, nothing will stand in her way. If she reschedules a date it's because she got a better offer." This was almost 50 years ago and her advice served me well. If I asked a gal for a first date on Friday night and she said she couldn't then but could on Saturday I figured she had a higher priority date and I dropped her like a rock.
🙏
Good big sister to lay it out with no ambiguity.
I feel like such a gump. . A girl flaked on me 4 times and everytime I was like "it's okay, I'm sure we'll figure something out" about a month later she's posting pregnancy scans of her and her new dude, they're having a baby. Yeah never again
@@mikeyjxy Naa that’s wild bro
If she wants to reschedule a date without setting a date-&-time or cancels it, a better response would be to ignore her text & delete her number entirely. Remember fellas, have an abundance mindset & always remember that you deserve a woman who has a burning desire for you
The only thing I'm going to say on this topic is, if someone wants to reschedule, you know they're serious when they give you more options.
"Hey, I'm working late tonight, I can't catch dinner, let's do drinks tonight instead."
Or, "hey, I can't due Friday, can we move dinner to Saturday instead?"
If they order a compromise, then they really mean it.
This is the conclusion I came to as well. Her offering a reschedule date and you being selfish with your time is key.
I'm 50 years old now, and I speak from having made all the mistakes. From that vantage I can say don't even respond if a woman cancels. Don't do ANYTHING. Act like nothing happened when she calls or messages you in a few weeks, and let her ask you out.
That's actually the best thing to do I think cause many women just don't know how to react when a HVM sets boundaries like this. Ghosting her probably hammers on the guilt rather than making her defensive.
Assuming a woman has strong, burning desire for you before the first date is not grounded in reality. Female attraction is a volume knob. Strong, confident alpha behavior turns it up. Being reactive and butthurt to her tests turns it down. If she's given reasonable notice, just reply "no worries" and then disappear until you hear from her. Never offer to reschedule if she cancels. If it's last-minute with no offer to reschedule, just ignore her and move on.
Yes you nailed it. That response from that dude was cringe as hell..."oh flaky behavior is a turn off.." that womens vagina instantly went sahara desert dry. Yeah keep it cool, let her come to you....
I don't buy the volume knob analogy. Women know within the first 5 minutes of meeting you if they're going to sleep with you or not.
@@no-stresscat1519 You're kind of right. Women know within the first 5 minutes IF they WOULD sleep with you. Not whether they WANT to sleep with you. Passing their minimum attraction threshold doesn't mean they suddenly have strong, burning desire for you and will drop their entire schedule to go on a date with you. You just have your foot in the door. It's up to you to bring her 5 attraction to a 7 or 8, and there are endless ways to knock it from 5 down to 'no thanks.' Being insecure and butthurt about a reschedule is a great way to do that.
@@thomasbrennan6303 This absolutely!
Or just ignore them altogether. So many funner things to do, than waste time on sketchy relationships. I still have so much to accomplish. In 50 years, I'll still be able to have kids. Time's on my side. There's no rush on my end.
Don't "punish" by making her buy you food. Just ignore her. Don't even give her that second chance until she's begging on her knees.
I've already been doing this. If they reschedule, I move on.
This is true. The cancelation of a date means, there is no burning desire at all. It means you are her second choice if not then her third.
Good point.
Spot on accurate , I give a girl one flakey opportunity and after that im out as far as getting together for the first time
Was seeing this smoke’n hot girl from the same church I attended.
On the con side, she had two kids. However, she was doing a very good job of raising them on her own.
Even with the two kids she was in demand and guys were interested in her. She was a hotty for sure, a good personality, fun to be around, kept a good house, knew how to cook, honest, and even though she was hot she could be trusted not to cheat.
She was looking for a man in her life, made no secret about it, and there was no shortage. Even in her blessed position she was selective about who she would let in.
She was the whole package except for the kids. They weren’t good or bad, just normal kids for their age. One girl and one boy. I got along with both of them fine. I liked playing board games with them on the living room floor with their mother also playing along with us.
Everything seemed to be going fine and other guys at the church would give me this “you lucky dog” look as I would pass them in the hallway.
So, now my boss is having his annual fall festival at his large home/farm. His wife is a schoolteacher and she has all sorts of fun activities planned for the kids that will be coming. She spent money on supplies based on how many kids are coming. My boss has tractor/hay rides planned for the kids, paint ball for the adults, a barbeque, a bond fire, plenty of food and refreshments, a large screen television….. it’s a big event and it’s good to be seen at these sorts of things when they happen.
We are allowed to bring a guest and I asked “Karla” if she wanted to join me. She had come to other in office parties and was familiar with most of the people that would be there. She said yes, and the deal was sealed.
On the day of, the morning of the festival I call her to verify times and other things. We were expected there around 1430hrs. later that day.
Now here comes the sh!t test. She announces to me over the phone that she would like me to come over at the scheduled time but instead of picking her and the kids up she wants me to delay our departure and help her clean her house for about two hours (I suspect that had I gone for this it would be more than two hours) before we leave to go to the festival! I am shocked at this request. She knows how important it is for me to be there and that I had already committed to my boss that I would be there, on time, and would be bringing a case (500 to a case) of paint balls. It came out of left field. When did she know this and why did she wait till now to tell me this? She said she wanted the house to be clean in case the social workers came over to look at the children’s living environment. Really? And you chose now to clean the house and is two hours of cleaning really going to make a difference on an already orderly house?
I was calm and told her that I would be glad to come over and pick her and the kids up at the planned time and take them all to the festival as planned without delay but would not be willing to spend any time cleaning up her house or waiting for her to do so.
She said, it’s only two hours.
I reminded her that I had committed to being at the festival at 1430hrs.. and was responsible for bringing paint balls and other items that are also expected to be there on time.
At this time of the year it starts getting dark around 1730hrs.. So, any paintballing would have to be over by then. Being two hours late would put my arrival at 1630hrs. You do the math.
She said, well can’t you be two hours late.
I said, yes I can but I am not going to do it for the reason of cleaning your house. That’s not a good reason.
I politely told her that if she wanted to clean her house it was certainly fine with me and I would make excused for her and her kids not being at the festival and that I was still planning on attending and arriving on time with or without her and her children.
She stuttered a little at this and then asked me if she could drive there on her own after cleaning her house and arrive late at the festival.
I told her if she wanted to do that it would be fine with me.
The bosses house/farm was not close and I started to give her directions. I could tell she wasn’t getting it. She had trouble getting around the city she lived in, much less out in the country.
She had already gotten in too deep to change her mind about cleaning her house and instead come with me to the festival. So, when it became painfully obvious she was not going to be able to drive herself out to the festival later in the day, she conceded that she would just stay home and not go.
I wished her all the best and we hung up. I went to the festival without her and when asked about where she was, I just said that things came up and she was not able to attend. I know all the guys wanted to see her. As I said, she was smoke’n hot.
Well anyways her phone stopped ringing and after about a week she called me and asked if everything was alright. I was very polite and told her that things were fine. I can tell she wanted to ask me why I hadn’t called her, but she didn’t. We had a very cordial conversation and I could also tell she was a little puzzled.
On that same call I made no future promises to see or call her, and I could tell she wanted me to. When I would see her in church I would always smile and say hi to her and sometimes she would even stop in the hallway to talk with me. She never asked me to stop over or why I wasn’t calling her or stopping over but I could tell she wanted me to ask her if I could come over sometime or to make plans to go out with her for some activity. Not happening.
As far as I was concerned she had given me a sh!t test and I passed and she failed and was now dealing with the consequences of her “test”.
Fortunately, I am in a position in life where I don’t have to be clingy. I put girls/orbiters in the friend zone, they don’t put me in the friend zone. With that move she had reached her expiration date, she could easily be replaced, and she knew it. I dropped her faster than a prom dress on prom night.
I don’t know why she thought she could play that card with me, but she did, and when she did, and put it on the table, it was set and game.
@@im1who84u I know that your post was made a year ago, but I was curious if this woman got a brain & realised that upon passing said shit test, that it was up to her ask you out or to initiate plans to catch up. That is the whole idea of the shit test. Did she ever ask you out?
@@puppy969 In a sense she did, but honestly I was done with her.
She would often talk to me in the church hallways when we would run into each other and ask me to call her, or sometimes I would see her from a distance and she would do that thing with her hand where her pinky finger and thumb would be sticking out and hold it up to her ear with her head tilted, smiling, and mouth the words for me to call her. When other guys saw her do this to me, they would always give me this look like, you lucky dog.
She was very pretty and could really have any guy she wanted. She did have those two kids though and that might have made it a harder sell for some guys, including me. The kids seemed to be okay, but they were still two kids that came with her.
I was a little unsure about getting involved with her in the first anyway but thought I would "test the waters". I mean she was kinda flirting with me so I thought why not? I wasn't really emotionally locked into her and still a little jittery about it all anyway. When she pulled that stunt, that made up my mind for me. I was outta here.
This happened some years ago and I have seen her with other guys off and on since then and I am assuming they are "dating" her. I was always happy for her in the kids when I saw her with what seemed to be a nice guy that was financially set in life, but she is still single and no one ever wifed her up. At this point I don't see it happening now.
Her son graduated high school and joined the military. Her daughter who looks very much like her mother is now an older teenager, or if you wish, a young adult.
Just another story in The Naked City.
She cancels once. Everyone has things that come up. No big deal
She cancels a second time. She has found something better to do
She cancels the third date. You don't value your own time
there is no 3rd time.
Bs. She would not say that to Brad Pitt.
I think the best thing to do when a woman flakes is to simply not say anything and don't respond. No need to call her, no need to even mention that she flaked, just give her absolute silence.
It's the perfect punishment/consequence because women can't stand being ignored. If you show that it didn't bother you because you're too busy to care, she will likely blow up your phone which shows she has that desire for you; it may even increase the desire.
Agree 110%.
I do that with my daughter's. If they are late for our father-daughter dates I order my meal, eat and leave. This is to teach them to respect other people's time and to teach them the consequences of narcissism and importance of values. If my daughter's value other things, events, people above their father knowing how difficult it is to schedule these dad-daughter times then when they need me I won't be available. Consequence drive behaviours. Women demand respect, but don't want to give it.
Hopefully this will teach my daughter's a lesson for when they date men and get dumped. They need to look at themselves and be accountable for their actions and behaviours.
let me guess, you teach your daughters how they have to be in your frame?
That’s……….one way to try to teach your daughters. I guess time will tell if it works. I’m tempted to say no, since they are your daughters and you probably should have taught them that lesson already but maybe I’m wrong. I’m not being a smart ass. I’m really into the outcome. Being into psychology as much as I am, and it being their father using a dating maneuver on them though I have my doubts.
@@readingthebible5413 Nothing teaches lessons better than consequences. My wife does the same with my daughter. I'm a qualified Master Coach in People and Business Performance and studied psychology, but you don't need my level of qualifications to understand that consequences change or reinforce behaviours. If you read the consequence scriptures in the bible then you would know that God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are great practioners of the principle. It works.
You were not there for kids when they were children to teach them respect? They r with you because they can’t stand you. They are showing their disrespect to you because of what you did to them when they were children. Probably not being there like a dad should be. Don’t pat yourself too much on the back for being an absent father. Respect is taught when children are young and now you think you’re a great dad of the world. Loser.
If that’s true then why do your daughters still need lessons? By your logic they should already know how to act
100% agree. Consequences are mandatory.......not punishment...there is a difference.
Consequences = a late fee when you miss the payment due date.
Punishment = card is cancelled
I'd break it off with her for using the word "toodles".
yah that's what I was thinking who the fuck uses that word, lol! It's like a grown man calling someone else "cupcake" and thinking they got one over on them.
I am pretty sure in that example she was breaking it off.
Had a similar situation. I replied, “Very well. I like steak and shrimp.” Her reply, “ Yes Daddy.” Next time she came over. She showed up with a Whole Foods bag with steak, shrimp, and red potatoes. Then she cooked it all for me👌🏼
waifu material!!!
Nice one!
But C'mon dude, we all know it was Dinner and "half a movie".😏
NxtDay-
Friend: So how'd it go?
Her: just dinner and a movie.
Friend: yeah? I watched that. How did it end?
Her: 😳
@@mrcool9672 haha! 🤣
Then everybody clapped
@@brandy5685 😆
Failing to punish bad behavior only invites more of it. Valuable lesson in all relationships.
Seems like a lot of modern dating problems stem from our own desire to believe that the other person will be a good match for us (which is perfectly understandable), but what we should be focused on is ruthlessly screening for red flags to avoid wasting time with losers. Only become invested once you know you're onto something good.
What i would do is give her the benefit of the doubt and not text her until she texts me. If she texts me i'll go out with her, but if it happens a 2nd time, imma go bye bye
if a girl only once flake on me without reschedule she is out of my life forever
I can count on one hand the number of times where a woman agreed to buying the first round or a meal because she flaked. Cooperative women are hard to find.
stop trying to find them, you never will. Its a fucking chinese finger trap my boy, okay? You have to understand that its gotta be the other way around, you have to let people come to you when you get your stuff in order.
Currently, I am married and I use your content to keep me on a good path. Cheers!
I think girls get angry towards some guys who respond like that, because they've established the guy as not alpha.
But because its an alpha response, it kinda throws them into a state of frustration as they don't feel the guy should be allowed to act that way.
Its like the guy suddenly presents a threat, that he might actually trick a member of the sisterhood into believing he's alpha, despite, possibly being beta, and only good for resources, not breeding.
Interesting comment
You've been reading Rollo
Lmao
Had a hiking date planned with this chick. It was planned for about a week. The morning of, she said she can’t make it because she forgot it was Election Day. At the time that wasn’t a good enough excuse for me. Turns out she had a boyfriend the whole time we were talking.
Just pretend like you don't know and drill her. And blackmail her... LOL
LOL You have to love these excuses! 'Election Day' is almost as bad as science week.
The women's suffrage card. Nice. Eventually we will hear about the gay pride day parade excuse. "But I forgot I had promised my bff to go!"
@@charlesbrown179 Lmao. So true.
Deja vu 👀
If you cancel on me, there is no "raincheck". We're done here!
If they want to depend on us then we need to depend on them to keep their word.
Love it
here's a deeper layer that most idiots miss, when she doesn't flake and follow through with the date, pay attention if she spends a disrespectful amount of time on her phone while on date.
Even better, if she always put her phone face down
Gotta be a real qualified idiot to miss those
I Will not tolerate that
if a date using her phone on a date with you, you better just walk out.
You gotta show a girl that she ain't shit. Acting eager for a rescheduled date is a turn off wether she was into you or not. If she wasn't into you, it's embarrassing and you'll get ghosted.. If she was into you, now it appears like you're stuck for options and desperate
You just can't win, eh?
I hear you, but logic needs to prevail. You’ve got to put in some effort and willingness to empathize if there’s a logical set of circumstances. Life happens, and there are legitimate reasons why it could happen. I think that holding too firmly to your own rigidity could also be indicative of a character flaw. It can be difficult to navigate.
Facts man. Had a girl flake on me, ignored her and negged her when I saw her. She texted me later and I didn't respond. I'll get to her later, she's put herself in her own place, and that is in the back of the line.
The consequences if someone tries to reschedule on me are 1)Smile, say 'no problem' then walk away, don't look back, don't offer any other option. 2)Go about your life, get another date.... I have never not had the 're-scheduler' not reach out again..... Some a day later some months later but they ALWAYS do. 👍
I met a woman on a social media platform not too long ago and same thing. We texted on the phone, the app and had finally set up a date after 3 weeks. She didn't work and had two kids. She had the nerve to cancel. I kept texting her the rest of the day and that evening. The following days I slowly started texting less and then finally a week later I stopped altogether. This day in age makes it extremely difficult to find a woman to text, talk to and date. I'm 45 and honestly starting to lose hope I'll find someone.
Oh, you will if you want to. I'm in the same boat. It's like the stick market. The longer the accumulation, the bigger the take-off.
Why are you lowering your standards in the first place? If she doesn't even have a job then that's a low quality woman
Sorry Bro, she did all this to get rid of you. If it took 3 weeks to set the date, you were not her first choice, nor her 2nd. It's a good thing for you because a woman w/no job and 2 kids = trouble, financial and otherwise. And you'd always have the feeling in the back of your head that she might be with you just for your resources. One suggestion - keep texts to a minimum, using to set up dates. If she cancels, don't harass her just move on.
Any woman that reschedules a date, makes me lose interest, INSTANTLY. I don’t reschedule dates.
Eexactly
Yeah I'm done and it's over
When I get a reschedule request I don't even bother responding. Delete the numbers. It's best to send her a text asking who is texting next time she is texting
Anyone with sons should bookmark this channel and from the first time a son asks about females, go through everything here systematically. What I would have given to have someone teach me stuff like this when I was 19 rather than figure out this stuff the hard way and waste precious soul energy. Thank you for your service, kind man I have never met
Dated this one chic for a while. Long enough thst she had met the fam. Couple weeks before Easter she promised my grandmother she would make a ham for the gathering. Easter day she calls(late) says come get the ham i gotta finish blah blah blah. So i go to the house(very close by) she hands me a pan with a fukin raw ham in it, and starts giving me instructions on how to cook it. So i look at her smile walk over to the trash can dumped it in, and never spoke to her again...
What most men don't seem to realize is that beauty is not like the finest wine or whiskey that will age well. It's more like youth, yogurt, red meat or milk. It will smell like rotten garbage by tomorrow morning.
I’m at a point in my life where I have zero tolerance for cancelled / rescheduled dates. Of course there are real emergencies, I get that - but in general, this absolutely demonstrates low value and a lack of respect for your time.
One more story LOL 😂 I had another girl I was seeing that would occasionally be tardy, so the one time when we made plans I waited about a half an hour, she said she was on her way and I left, she got to the destination only to say "I'm here", to which I replied, "I'm home, fuck off". Days went by and I didn't text her, eventually she texted me....... Don't let women walk on you no matter how high their position is. In her particular case she had high standings (job wise) and was very f****** attractive.
It was very childish saying that bro , you should have just not texted her at all !!
being flaky or late is disrespectful: in relationship or not. Because someone took time and money and prepared and scheduled around that activity, and to cancel last minute or make them wait habitually (unless it's emergency) is inconsiderate and unacceptable.
If someone doesnt respect your time, they are not worth your time. Period.
💯
In my opinion you're 100% correct .. when I was a young man whenever a girl canceled on me I just wouldn't call them again .. my very very best girlfriends I ever had would call me after a few days and apologize for canceling and ask if they could take me out .. Those girls are definitely interested .. this was around 40 years ago since I'm now in my 60s but I can tell you from experience that's the way to live
The problem is when you get with an online girl she’s constantly getting attention from men that will bend their schedules around and pay for dates. So when you try to hold these type of women accountable they will say no. Which is ok, but just a fact
I'm not gonna be treated like anything anymore. I know my worth and if someone doesn't treat me right, they have a problem.
A great deal depends on the particulars of the situation. E.g.: 1) She started a new job two months ago. Her boss told her Tuesday that she's going to a business conference leaving Thursday night, returning Wednesday night. She called me Tuesday within minutes of being told about the travel.
I'm ok with that.
2) She is a Doctor, lawyer, or LEO. She calls me an hour before the date to let me know that she got called to tend to a patient/lead a team defending her law firm's biggest client/investigate a murder.
I'm ok with that.
@Redrustyhill 🤣 about the pound sand part.
Why date at all? Modern women have literally nothing to offer. Focus on yourself.
DING DING DING!!!!
Out 3-4 billion women you’ve came to the conclusion based on your experience of a handful of girls, that they have nothing to offer. Huh....
I can think of at least one reason and it rhymes with vagina.
Don't date, spin plates, simple as that, I don't understand how some guys are still interested in dating
Why are you on this channel then, you've made up your mind, go about your life alone. Some of us like to get laid, but at the same time know not to get into serious relationships.
you probably hear this all the time. you changed my life and the life of my son forever. ive always was told I was a beta even by the last person I ever expected, she will remain in the shadow. now I have the drive to start not one , not two but three businesses. this is more about women. it's about self confidence to succeed in whatever I do and never quit thank you.
You know, I would definitely respect a response with a consequence because it demonstrates confidence and emphasizes the importance of your time. I am a woman married to a top caliber man and he respectfully but firmly upholds consequences from the first date onward. He impressed me by being straightforward with his boundaries and being married to him has really helped me become a more straightforward person as well. If it helps, I consider myself an honest, traditionally feminine woman and have been sought after for reasons beyond just good looks. I do not have social media accounts and am extremely respectful of my high caliber husband so I do not engage with other men so this scenario is hypothetical to how I was before marriage. If I had to cancel a date with someone I was looking forward to, #1 I would apologize profusely and suggest a different day and time so that the next date is solidified. I would also try to make it up to the guy by offering to make dinner or a picnic or something. I was never a "go out drinking" girl and tbh it will be more difficult to find a nice girl in a bar. Basically, I believe a man should uphold his standards and expect a classy and appropriate answer from his potential date. If she throws a fit that easily, it is definitely a red flag.
If a woman flakes, don’t reply to her text. Woman are guilty to talk on the phone, they rather do it through text.
One of the truest facts I've seen here today.
Yeah facts. Never reply back. Just leave that shit on seen bro
I’ve been out of the game for a while but if one person in a relationship reschedules or cancels, the unspoken rule is that the person who tries to reschedule or cancels has the responsibility to go an extra two miles to affirm genuine interest. Otherwise move on and don’t get attached because if you chase the reschedule, you’ve set the dynamic in the relationship as the one without power
That's a good way of looking at it
Love this. I recently came to this conclusion on my own just recently, actually. A girl I met online canceled the morning-of our date, citing her dad, whose birthday was a day before, wanted to celebrate the day of our hangout. She mentioned rescheduling, but I didn’t want to give her another day the following week. I’d turned down another girl because I had this planned with the one who cancelled. So I told her to get back in touch with me in a couple of weeks. So my “punishment” was putting her in time-out lol. She said she would so we’ll see. But I’m never reaching out or bringing up getting together again. If I don’t hear from her again, I’ll see it as a win. No room for flakey bitches in my life.
Also, the censorship is bullshit. Toxic feminism, love that phrase. Cheers
You didn’t punish her at all Mr. virtue signaler Stupid Ukrainian flag guy. She was out and about doing her thing. You were probably low value to her so that’s why she canceled in the first place. Don’t think too you’re so high and mighty. Ur Nothing
Ruthless! Bravo 👏
Did she ever contact you again? Lol
I think once is fine. Life happens and if there's an apology that accompanies it yeah cool. Everyone deserves second chances nobody deserves a third
Yea, I agree. If there is a really good reason why they had to reschedule then that's fine. We just gotta be aware if were getting played and test to see if the woman is genuinely interested.
@@AdventureEpic exactly. This is the main reason I don't date single mums if I'm honest. The whole thing about raising another man's kids is irrelevant if you're just spinning plates but the cancelling at the last minute is a real pain in the ass. It's fine their kids come first I respect that but I have better things to do that waste a Saturday evening being stood up
How often do you reschedule your dates?
If "everyone gets a second chance" that gives them an excuse to keep constantly F-ing up "that first time" with every single person they encounter in life. Not a good attitude to take.
@@Mage64 I don't really date that often to be honest. I've lost a lot of interest in it. It's about having standards I think. You need to have intuition I think
My father taught me that:
A- Treat people the way you’d want to be treated.
B- Leave things better that you found them.
Two great simple lessons that show/grow your character.
Doesn't work with dating my friend.
@@TheCycloneTrooper sure it does, I’ve always treated my wife the way I would expect to be treated, been working for 15 years.
Every girlfriend in the distant past that I left I’m pretty sure I left them better off then when I found them. 😂
Absolutely correct
I have just told women bye I won’t even bother.
So Myron was being nice 👍🏾. You’re either on my program or leave.
Your first date is a microcosm of life together
I absolutely love your work Mr Cooper. I've been saying stuff like this for years and was constantly called a misogynist for it. I've been abandoned by the opposite sex more times than I care to count for it too.
Never stop doing what you are doing.
When they do that to me, I just block them from my phone. I came to the conclusion (and he said it on the video) that they cancel or reschedule because they’re going out with another guy or they don’t have the burning desire so they’ll find something else more important for them.
When she re-schedules, just say, "Thanks and goodbye." IF she really had to take her mother to the morgue SHE'LL aggressively re-schedule. But guys, MOST of the time she thinks she's got an upgrade opportunity, so in your mind you're already #2 or #3 at best.
Any girl who lashes out like that is not someone you want in your life in any capacity. If she were actually just innocently busy, and wanted to truly meet up, she would respond something like “I’m sorry you feel that way I’m sure it does look bad but I do genuinely want to see you.” She wouldn’t freak the hell out. People get extremely defensive when they are correctly called out on BS.
Good point.
in the past I would've handled this very differently. she did him a favor. when you realize there's another one waiting for you around the corner, making her deal with consequences or just letting her go becomes very easy.
In the first date, i dont think there should be a quote and quote ''punishment''. I would be more interested if she is giving another date, like ''sorry im busy can we meet the next day?''. Thats excusable. She really can be busy at the moment. The worse comes if she doesnt even mentions a rescadule date
As Rich says. Everything is a test. You’ll be dealt a bunch of sh!t, how you respond is what its all about. Genius
Girls can’t cancel a date if I never ask them out 😌🙏🏽
😜
You must have 1 big bicep or RSI lol
@@gunsharck 🤣🤣🤣🤣💀
I call it as a lose-lose situation
Woah?! This just happened to me today! I told her..
"I'm not about people bailing on me multiple times, just saying"
her response was..
"I don't think I'm in a social mood anyways and don't want to lead you on."
Then she deflected and blamed it on getting called back to work and being too tired to meet up afterwards.
You know what to do, amigo. Go BIG. Block, Ignore, Ghost.
If it happens again, don't even give her the courtesy of a reply. This rule applies to the 1st time she does it, don't give her the chance to do it to you "multiple" times! Delete number and move on to the next..
“She’s not yours it’s just your turn”. Wow that hit hard. So true it hurts. Once I can get over this last hump I’ll be truly free bruh.
I understand sometimes life can happen. There's a huge difference between "I have to work, let's try to reschedule vs "I have to work. If you want you can come over to watch a movie afterwards. I can order pizza."
One wants to see you. The other doesn't.
For me personally, 1 strike equals 3 strikes. First impressions are everything and if she cancels out on the first date, she doesn't even deserve a reply. She's showing you from the get go who she really is. I just block her number and forget about her. The only way I'll reply is if she tries to text from another phone to get around the block placed on her. Her effort in that case deserves a response.
Very well said
I always had this idea, when I want to meet a girl I make some time abailable, no matter what. So, if she reschedules she is not that commited.
Giving her your preferences what she can do for you is a good way to say: "Okay, I give you one more chance."
Otherwise it's a waste of time.
Was single until I was 32 and loved my life. Now married 25 years. Key to happiness? Boundaries. I compromise on most things and don't put my marriage at risk. But I established boundaries that are non negotiable. Couple of cigars a week with a buddy. Few single malts. Peeing standing up. When you set a boundary expect push back. Don't get angry. Don't over explain or justify. Just act. She will come around. And if she doesn't that's ok too. I don't require her agreement on everything that I do.
U hit the nail on the head with why his account got banned. The word “punish” instantly got a negative reaction out of people before he even said anything. Honestly in the era of click bait it was the only word that truly fit the narrative and would get tons of views.
Just came across your account yesterday, everything you say is so spot on with the direction I've been leading myself on my own and I just bought your book, already feel all the bullshit oozing and dissipating from my brain, thank you for your clarity, work, and leadership!
When you plan for something, but have to cancel it, if you care about them, then you'd want to try to make it up to them. The fact that she reacted in the way that she did to him suggesting a way for her to make it up to him makes it perfectly clear that she didn't respect him or his time and didn't see either of them as valuable.
When I was young and dating in high school in the early 1970s, I had one basic rule. Whoever I was dating, I told them when I come to pick you up.....
be ready. You've got 15 minutes after I show up. If you're not ready in 15 minutes, I'm out the door, as I'm not going to sit there and talk to your mother and father be "interrogated" while you're still screwing around for an hour getting ready, when you knew what time the date was. Some girls got pissed off when I left, others learned quickly. I taught my son the same basic rule.
Aww thats so precious..it does not work like that 2020 My brother
@@uptamistik Yeah, it does. Self respect and respect for other people's time never went out of style, beta. It's the entire point of setting a time in the first place.
@@craig328 Lol. Yes Kevin really is a beta.
Totally right man, if she freaks over that she'll freak out 10 times worse later in the relationship. People will never do or say anything you don't invite them to do, If they do it more than once it's because you have taught them it's ok or they're just poor quality people and not worth your time. Valuable and intelligent people don't engage in yelling, fighty, or destructive behavior. I dated a girl for a year and a half, early on she flipped one time I told her the next time she did that she was gone my life is a drama free zone and I don't put up with that. A year later she got comfortable/stupid and flipped out. I told her on the spot door key on the dresser, grab your shit and never come back. Her face immediately change to "OH SHIT" I pointed to the stairs no talking it out, no debating, no explaining, nothing, she knew the expectation of behavior and chose not to comply. I had to block her on all channels because she kept blowing me up begging me to take her back. Usually if a girl tries to flake I don't even bother responding just hard next.
Just tell her "no worries, totally understand" go to the gym and find somebody to take out same time instead. When she circles back, take the date! Don't discuss what you did instead, re aim the convo back onto the fun date with her. DO NOT REVEAL what you did.
Hey Rich, just a question and request. Here in Australia it is very common for a woman to just one day change the locks and you can't enter the home cos she has also got a restraining order, (75% have been confirmed to be false in Australia). The man is on the streets having to find somewhere to go! Some sleep in their cars, some in their office, or relatives. There is no outcry or tears shed for these men. Does this happen in Canada or the states? Can you have a discussion, or suggest how you navigate such problems or see them coming? Cheers