Thank you Brenda for being willing to share her experiences with us! If you feel that you can relate to any of these experiences, do let us know (And of course, if you want to see Leah on a future episode, tell us what you'd want to hear her talk about, wink wink)
Please do have a Zula chat about having divorced parents and how it affected them. When Leah asked whether we want that, I highly suggest that because honestly, I am one who has divorced parents and have had it affected me when I was 12 and I feel Brenda when she said she had tp grow up so fast when it happened to her at 16.
Agree. We should have an episode on kids with divorced parents and how it impacted the kids be it positive or negative. My parents divorced when I was barely a toddler and because I was the youngest, the age gap with my siblings were so far apart that I was forced to grow up independently.
@@shinyu18 thank you for sharing. Sorry for what you, your sister and mom had to go through. My family (including extended relatives) has seen/experienced 5 divorces, all with the in-law having an affair or leaving. Early congrats on your wedding!
Leah is such a great facilitator and moderator!! She really knows how to make the guests comfortable and brings in great scenarios for discussion! Brenda looking rlly good and adorable with the bangs 😌
I think apart from divorced parents, one of the worst feelings is like seeing your parents NOT divorced but then not talking or interacting... It's like wthell I rather you guys just divorce. Adding to the whole friend thing.. honestly you wouldn't know anyone's true colours until you guys dated and have been through ups and downs together
What’s wrong with someone wanting to be picky?? It’s her problem and her choice if she doesn’t easily find a guy to date. Nothing wrong in wanting to be worthy enough of her
@@lukeTJQ IF no one said it’s wrong, they wouldn’t have made this video. Guess you’re also a “typical” Singapore guy who don’t listen clearly(or at all).
Glad to know some people are also experiencing the same thing like Brenda. At the age where some of your school mates are either getting engaged or married with children, things can get lonely when you doubt and questioned your worth of being loved after you’ve been alone for quite some time or for your whole life. At the end of the day, finding yourself and loving yourself during these alone years could mean so much more than putting yourself up on someone’s idea of life and love.
Frankly, if there is one thing one ought to be picky about, it's your life partner. Brenda is perfectly sweet and she deserves the best partner to go through life with. I applaud her for being strong and independent.💜
Used to be a little lost with dating myself. I'm also the "we should start off as friends" type, and that's fine. The huge revelation for me was, keeping it purely platonic for too long can kill the romance vibes permanently. So yeah, a little teasing can keep the flame going. Might not be the same for everyone, but that's my 2 cents.
With the subpar Eng standard of the entire on-screen team, speaking just proper Eng would already put anyone above the rest. Though Brenda sins almost just as much as the rest in speaking terrible English. Good Singlish, terrible English.
I can relate to brenda 100%, same situation too, single for 25 years🤣 On a serious note I feel you should love yourself first before you can love someone else. Again being picky is normal, you don't want end up with someone who you are not gonna marry. Just my thoughts😊
Same!! Don't settle for someone just because you are at certain age or you feel left out. Because meeting the wrong person will cause more problems in your life! It's okay to be picky or to have your own checklist! :) Thank you for sharing Brenda!
Really love Brenda's candidness and her outlook in life, being whole as a person and independent. And it is true sometimes the societal and peer pressure to achieve a lot of 'relationship' things is just getting out of hand. Why is there a need to have so many exes or experience a lot of relationships and intimate goals when you are younger. The age is just getting younger man...
Brenda, thank you for speaking up about your experience/perspective. I’m almost 30 and have never been in a relationship. I’ve just been focused on my studies and on building a career that I’m proud of, which is admittedly taking a longer time than I would have liked though it’s not something I regret investing my time in. And similar to you I had an experience with a guy in uni that made me not want to pursue romance because of all the mind games and unnecessary drama But yes I too feel embarrassed/left out sometimes in group settings even if my friends do not intend it that way at all simply because they can relate to each other about relationship matters but I can only offer my theoretical advice or observations as a third party. Sometimes I am also excluded from certain events because some friends would rather have just couples present and are afraid I would feel more left out if I were invited - my suggestion would be to surround yourself with more friends who are also single or in more unconventional relationships/arrangements such as people who are dating but don’t plan to get married, or people who are married but don’t plan to have kids. It helps to shift your perspective away from a very normative idea of how one should live their life and also balance out those feelings of being left out with your regular friends too 🥺 And yes we may be left out but we’re not losing out 💜
You are a great talent Brenda! I did not start dating officially till i was 27. Met my first boyfriend then who is my husband now, it's just that I have not met the right person at the correct time before that. Don't worry, you will find the one at the right time 😊
thanks for speaking for us brenda. i can totally relate as an evergreen at 27 & also having my parents divorced since I was young. happy to hear that joining tsl has made you feel more whole / better as a person. i'm not there yet but i acknowledge that i'm a work in progress! lastly i hope that you meet the right guy soon as you deserve all the love in the world! xx
Thanks for sharing your experience Brenda! Relatable, single for 25 years and people always ask why/how am I single... There's definitely this peer pressure cos friends around me are getting engaged, BTO, and starting a family. Well, self-love comes first and I'm fine being on my own. YES to strong independent ladies and it's ok to be "picky" cos we know what we don't want (;
Brenda’s experience with her parents divorce was exactly how i dealt with my parents divorce. My parents divorced when i was 16 as well and i was forced to grow up because i am the first born. I have high expectations of relationships as well and i’m dealing with other underlying issues in relation to both the divorce and expectations such as going hot and cold on guys, not opening up, trust issues, people pleasing, focusing on being successful and building myself... It’s sad but i’m glad i’m not the only one who dealt with this.
It's very brave that she's willing to share something so personal. Whether she's single or not is her own choice. Not everyone needs a relationship in life. Some people might just require companionship/friendship at different phase in life. And when the lady is not ready for relationship, better not get into one. There's a lot of risk attached to relationship and marriage. Otherwise, being divorced and worse to have kids to bring up on her own are worse than being single.
OMG Brenda's friends are so wise! Her friends bring Brenda to a surprise chill meeting with some guys at the end of the day without telling her beforehand. Her friends help to intro her to guys so Brenda does not need to worry too much. Sometimes it is easier for someone to help us out than for us to help ourselves. It seems like meeting new guys can be one such area. When we help ourselves we risk getting into a lot of self doubt. Keep it up Brenda's friends!
To be honest, being single takes more courage and strength than being attached. The kind of societal pressure you have to deal with being single can be very overwhelming.... Really admire Brenda for being open and real about this even though its not easy being the different one 😜👏
I was so single back then till i met my husband, he is my first love when I'm already in my late 20s. Before him, i have been thru a few dates but none were compatible or they just ghosted me after a few times going out. Enough of letting myself down and heartbreaks, I stopped dating for 8 years. That 8 years made me love my independence more and i grew into a stronger person. Then he came along and accepted me for me.
omg can relate so much !!!!!!!!! :”) you just put my thoughts into words, so if anyone asks why i’m single i can sent them the link to this video hahaha
As a much older guy, i really think you should not let the experience of other people dictate your life. You are at an age when you should really be out experiencing the different facets of life. Make some mistakes, break your heart, break a few other people's heart. No one is born intelligent. We only become intelligent after more experiences. Hope you be able to live your life. Because I do regret that I haven done as much as I should have. Its not about fulfilling societal norms, its about living a life where you feel all the strong emotions happy and sad, both good and bad, and these tell you are truly truly living.
Thank you Leah for being such a great host and friend to Brenda which made her spoke about such private matters so comfortably in front of the camera & as an individual, I feel like I can 100% relate to Brenda because I feel like I’m just the guy version of her. However, since she’s slightly more reserved towards meeting people online, maybe dropping this comment would help? hahahahaha 🙃 To whoever that can win her heart in the future, you’re really lucky!! Please take care of this angel 😇
Omg can we have a speed dating episode for Brenda? Like the Jubilee's 1 vs 20 series. Simping candidates or their friends submit applications and Leah screen through them. And Brenda does speed dating w them and eliminate them along the way
my parents divorce when i was 1 years old so i understand how Brenda feels because its never easy to have to go thru all this as a child and growing up like this isnt what we want but at the same time its also something we cant stop..
reading through the comments, i’m glad that there are people who are in the same situation as me. as someone who is surrounded by couples and always being a lightbulb, it sometimes affects me and hurts my self confidence, and there are certain times when i’m like sad i can’t find anyone to go places with? idk like i hesitate when asking some of my attached friends out to certain places la. and the societal pressure is real when you are forever single at 26 yo. but i’m rly like “don’t have lor” “if it happens it happens” and wanting to start as friends as well. have tried apps for quite a while and i rly think this is not for me. i feel like ppl in seemingly happy relationships don’t believe that i am rly okay being single, and it makes things so annoying, bc i feel like they kinda pity me..? i don’t have high expectations, but i just feel like a relationship should add to my quality of life and not hurt it.
One of my favorite movie is Never Been Kissed so I really feel for Brenda. I hope for Brenda to be happy always. One doesn't need to have a life partner to feel happy, in fact the way the world is now, it's perfectly fine to be single! Brenda you seemed a beautiful person inside and out! You deserve the best!
The interviewer is very non judge mental.. I like her style of going in deeper to ask Brenda questions. Brenda is also very matured, finding peace with herself. I can tell that she has pondered these similar qns herself and finally found the answers deep within herself
Can relate here too. Been single for 24 years and I'm still happily single and not rushing to jump into something unless it feels right. And I've spent 22/23 years learning to love myself. It's so important to do that before u can afford to give some love to others =)
Brenda seems like a very genuine person and I really admire and like her for that. I'm sure there are still many sides to her that she doesn't show on screen and even to others. I can relate to her being guarded and more of a face to face conversations kind of person. I'm also all bi myself but it doesn't really bother me that much. Just go with the flow and I hope you will happen to find that someone for you! BTW, Brenda with bangs is really cute 😁
Thanks Brenda for sharing your story with us! Honestly there’s nothing wrong with being picky. Many of us rush to get into relationships just because that’s the societal norm and some of us are afraid of being alone and just settle for something lesser. You do you girl! Btw where is Brenda’s blazer frommm it’s gorgeous!!
This world needs more people like Brenda, thank you for sharing, I think people should take relationship and marriage more seriously, date with purpose, and have kids only when you're ready
Well i vibe with the same "not actively searching" but if it happens it happens. Always good to start from self-love and then we can learn to appreciate everything else more. Cheers
Thank you Brenda, its good to know that I'm not the only single af person, but single by choice. Been single for 30 years since birth, and just like Brenda I've grown to become very ok with being alone. I'm also not ok with knowing someone with the intention to date, i prefer making friends and know them inside out first. And family issues definitely affected me greatly. This video is so so so relatable, and so so so comforting.
i’d love to hear more about other people’s experiences on having divorced parents, personally i do and sometimes it really does affect my mental health
I relate so so well with Brenda given the same background, experience and thoughts. Thank you Brenda for sharing. It makes me know that I’m not alone and I don’t have to be bothered by it? ☺️
I never clicked on a video faster in my life when i saw the title when it involves Brenda... Hahaha But jokes aside, i can really relate to her about going through parents divorcing for kids at such a young age. Seeing your parents from being so loving to them slowly drifting apart and the kids having to be 'messengers' between the both of them, its' really painful and we have those thoughts of putting the blame on ourselves. We should definitely have more conversation about how these affect these kids mentally because personally like what she mentioned, we were forced to grow up especially being the older sibling.
when you've been single for so long, you're the most self-sufficient and independent person there is. word. #mylifestory love Brenda for being so relatable and finding the words to voice out my thoughts. have had the exact same thoughts but could never find the words to express them perfectly. thank you. 🥰
Brendaaa🥺 u r exactly me!! 😭 I've been single for my entire life. And the reasons and thoughts u have about is exactly the same for mee 😭 maybe more than that. I enjoy being single but i like someone to be with and have fun like best friends but I fear to fall in love. A lot reasons maahnn. every sentence u told in this video is the thing i say to people when they ask why you're single 🥺🤧
Brenda seems really sweet and genuine and more so, confident. And to be honest, relationships feel like the norm nowdays that a lack of it is being seen as different. Rather than the term different, I would say that I respect her for having standards. Rather than saying that she is afraid to be vulnerable, it just shows that she is comfortable with herself and will only be with a guy she can be herself with and not because she needs a companion. Respect❤️
My parents' divorce taught me never to get married if I don't have a house to run away to in case my husband becomes abusive and a prenuptial to prevent being trapped in said marriage. I never used to think a pre-nuptial necessary but it really sucks if you have to trade the roof over your head for your freedom.
You get me. I will do a prenup too and I will also not have multiple marriage with kids from different men. Just one marriage and one set of kids is enough for me.
Sameeeee totally can relate to her when she say “everyone experience it when she’s havnt experience it yet” stay strong and love yourself 🙆♀️ wishing all the best in future~
I really love this episode!! ✨ Brenda you're amazing! Thank you for sharing your experiences with us and emphasising on the importance of independence and self-love. I really needed this 🥺
Im around the same position as brenda man. Like, having to be with a guy who asked me to be his gf but after a few weeks, throw me off and say he needed more time to have this relationship off for a while but in the end, liking my friend instead. And bruh that hurt and am being traumatised for being like a used rubbish just hits me everytime.
I can totally relate to all the things brenda said about how a past experience and a broken family affected her. And also that i can’t do dating app too which is exactly what brenda explained and previously i couldn’t really explain why, now i know why and how to explain it. Thanks brenda and ask zula for the insight too!
Can totally relate tbh, parents divorced at 15/16, never really been in a relationship. Totally agree with y'all when you say being a complete person and happy with ourselves. Hope Brenda meets someone nice soon☺️😉
I can totally relate to Brenda about dating apps. I've also only had a relationship for 4 months and then stayed single after, and people keep telling me I'm picky but I really am just looking for someone I can click with. Also agree with the need to start as friends first and dating apps are not for me.
Really enjoyed this ep! I resonate with many of the points she brought up 😢 not to pressure but she could try bumble because you can set the criteria to just looking for friends! Speaking as someone who used bumble before a little :)
Thanks Brenda for sharing your story... I can totally relate to you as my experience with yours is 90% similar... I'm fine with being single for life, but if someone wants to walk in, I'm open to it... Certainly F2F and as friends first... Dating app doesn't work for me either...
It’s okay Brenda! One day it will be your turn!! Being single for my whole life made me relate to 100% to whatever you’ve said and made me realise that I am not the only one having those kind of mindsets. One thing I realise after being alone for so long is to take having a partner as like a bonus. Make big plans for yourself. Assuming that you gonna be alone forever, plan when wanna buy house, buy car and save up for it. Those in relationship can split the cost with their parter, but singles can’t. Sooooo... sad lah HAHAAHHA Jiayou Brenda 💜
Aww Brenda!!! I can really relate to her :) i too have similar experiences, esp the family situation and the no experience. me having not much desire to be in one, my group of friends who are mostly single (and likewise no experience also) & my asexuality also contribute to me being very very okay with being single. thanks for sharing brenda!
Thank you Brenda for sharing your story! I think Leah's idea is a good one, maybe you can invite divorced couples to share their view as a parent/couple? Perhaps invite their children too. But yeah quite a touch subject to open up to the public since it can be pretty personal. I think you guys did it before but it's just the children. Perhaps you can invite the parents too? Also PS: Leah's such a great host! :)
I love Brenda! :) Can relate to her so much! I suddenly remembered the episode where she was taken out on a blind date, and Fauzi was like "Brenda, is it i am giving away my child"?
I agree on the point of being whole before finding someone. But when we found that person, we start to rely one and another more. And if we fall out of love after that, are we whole again or will we be whole again as a person?
Can totally empathise because I'm also the messenger...between parents. Divorce is really something we should talk more about - for the children. And also maybe can include free legal help and counselling options.
Thank you Brenda for being willing to share her experiences with us! If you feel that you can relate to any of these experiences, do let us know (And of course, if you want to see Leah on a future episode, tell us what you'd want to hear her talk about, wink wink)
Please do have a Zula chat about having divorced parents and how it affected them. When Leah asked whether we want that, I highly suggest that because honestly, I am one who has divorced parents and have had it affected me when I was 12 and I feel Brenda when she said she had tp grow up so fast when it happened to her at 16.
Agree. We should have an episode on kids with divorced parents and how it impacted the kids be it positive or negative. My parents divorced when I was barely a toddler and because I was the youngest, the age gap with my siblings were so far apart that I was forced to grow up independently.
The part on apps is real. Rather have a F2F over a meal or chill over coffee chat than through apps.
@@NatashaLuvsMusic not sure if you've seen it but they did do one with people who have divorced parents th-cam.com/video/lLwbu0RkvyY/w-d-xo.html
@@shinyu18 thank you for sharing. Sorry for what you, your sister and mom had to go through.
My family (including extended relatives) has seen/experienced 5 divorces, all with the in-law having an affair or leaving.
Early congrats on your wedding!
Leah is such a great facilitator and moderator!! She really knows how to make the guests comfortable and brings in great scenarios for discussion! Brenda looking rlly good and adorable with the bangs 😌
Whoever wins brenda's heart strike jackpot. Such a lovely person.
I think apart from divorced parents, one of the worst feelings is like seeing your parents NOT divorced but then not talking or interacting... It's like wthell I rather you guys just divorce. Adding to the whole friend thing.. honestly you wouldn't know anyone's true colours until you guys dated and have been through ups and downs together
What’s wrong with someone wanting to be picky?? It’s her problem and her choice if she doesn’t easily find a guy to date. Nothing wrong in wanting to be worthy enough of her
why you so aggresive? hahahahahaha no one said its wrong.
Nth wrong. Just that it's very hard to find someone that suits all your preferences
@@lukeTJQ typical Sg girl
Exactly
@@lukeTJQ IF no one said it’s wrong, they wouldn’t have made this video. Guess you’re also a “typical” Singapore guy who don’t listen clearly(or at all).
Glad to know some people are also experiencing the same thing like Brenda. At the age where some of your school mates are either getting engaged or married with children, things can get lonely when you doubt and questioned your worth of being loved after you’ve been alone for quite some time or for your whole life. At the end of the day, finding yourself and loving yourself during these alone years could mean so much more than putting yourself up on someone’s idea of life and love.
Well said
omg wah legit stan brenda she's so strong and independent
I always find her very pretty there will be a nice guy for her ☺️
my dogg
Ok but Brenda needs to drop the skincare routine or the foundation she uses bc her skin looks flawless
Frankly, if there is one thing one ought to be picky about, it's your life partner. Brenda is perfectly sweet and she deserves the best partner to go through life with. I applaud her for being strong and independent.💜
i feel like we need leah to talk abt herself on some topic on this show
th-cam.com/video/mC-ik0I32Qk/w-d-xo.html
She's so innocent. Internet warriors, please protect her at all cost.
Used to be a little lost with dating myself. I'm also the "we should start off as friends" type, and that's fine.
The huge revelation for me was, keeping it purely platonic for too long can kill the romance vibes permanently. So yeah, a little teasing can keep the flame going. Might not be the same for everyone, but that's my 2 cents.
Brenda is quite an underrated talent in TSL. Verbalises her thoughts very well.
Totally agree!
With the subpar Eng standard of the entire on-screen team, speaking just proper Eng would already put anyone above the rest. Though Brenda sins almost just as much as the rest in speaking terrible English. Good Singlish, terrible English.
I can relate to brenda 100%, same situation too, single for 25 years🤣 On a serious note I feel you should love yourself first before you can love someone else. Again being picky is normal, you don't want end up with someone who you are not gonna marry. Just my thoughts😊
Same!! Don't settle for someone just because you are at certain age or you feel left out. Because meeting the wrong person will cause more problems in your life! It's okay to be picky or to have your own checklist! :) Thank you for sharing Brenda!
Really love Brenda's candidness and her outlook in life, being whole as a person and independent. And it is true sometimes the societal and peer pressure to achieve a lot of 'relationship' things is just getting out of hand. Why is there a need to have so many exes or experience a lot of relationships and intimate goals when you are younger. The age is just getting younger man...
Brenda, thank you for speaking up about your experience/perspective. I’m almost 30 and have never been in a relationship. I’ve just been focused on my studies and on building a career that I’m proud of, which is admittedly taking a longer time than I would have liked though it’s not something I regret investing my time in. And similar to you I had an experience with a guy in uni that made me not want to pursue romance because of all the mind games and unnecessary drama
But yes I too feel embarrassed/left out sometimes in group settings even if my friends do not intend it that way at all simply because they can relate to each other about relationship matters but I can only offer my theoretical advice or observations as a third party. Sometimes I am also excluded from certain events because some friends would rather have just couples present and are afraid I would feel more left out if I were invited - my suggestion would be to surround yourself with more friends who are also single or in more unconventional relationships/arrangements such as people who are dating but don’t plan to get married, or people who are married but don’t plan to have kids. It helps to shift your perspective away from a very normative idea of how one should live their life and also balance out those feelings of being left out with your regular friends too 🥺
And yes we may be left out but we’re not losing out 💜
Yes, I loved that last line she said. Really well said
leah is such a good interviewer
You are a great talent Brenda! I did not start dating officially till i was 27. Met my first boyfriend then who is my husband now, it's just that I have not met the right person at the correct time before that. Don't worry, you will find the one at the right time 😊
thanks for speaking for us brenda. i can totally relate as an evergreen at 27 & also having my parents divorced since I was young. happy to hear that joining tsl has made you feel more whole / better as a person. i'm not there yet but i acknowledge that i'm a work in progress! lastly i hope that you meet the right guy soon as you deserve all the love in the world! xx
Thanks for sharing your experience Brenda! Relatable, single for 25 years and people always ask why/how am I single... There's definitely this peer pressure cos friends around me are getting engaged, BTO, and starting a family. Well, self-love comes first and I'm fine being on my own. YES to strong independent ladies and it's ok to be "picky" cos we know what we don't want (;
She eloquently sums up everything that I have gone through but haven't been able to tell my friend's, family and everyone else.
so true
Brenda’s experience with her parents divorce was exactly how i dealt with my parents divorce. My parents divorced when i was 16 as well and i was forced to grow up because i am the first born. I have high expectations of relationships as well and i’m dealing with other underlying issues in relation to both the divorce and expectations such as going hot and cold on guys, not opening up, trust issues, people pleasing, focusing on being successful and building myself...
It’s sad but i’m glad i’m not the only one who dealt with this.
Same here.I was so glad to know that i am not alone.
@@Shelly-kx2wz glad we are not alone 🥺
i feel u 🥲
It's very brave that she's willing to share something so personal. Whether she's single or not is her own choice. Not everyone needs a relationship in life. Some people might just require companionship/friendship at different phase in life.
And when the lady is not ready for relationship, better not get into one. There's a lot of risk attached to relationship and marriage. Otherwise, being divorced and worse to have kids to bring up on her own are worse than being single.
This is the most genuine and relatable episode :”) we love u Brenda ❤️🥺
OMG Brenda's friends are so wise!
Her friends bring Brenda to a surprise chill meeting with some guys at the end of the day without telling her beforehand.
Her friends help to intro her to guys so Brenda does not need to worry too much.
Sometimes it is easier for someone to help us out than for us to help ourselves. It seems like meeting new guys can be one such area. When we help ourselves we risk getting into a lot of self doubt.
Keep it up Brenda's friends!
To be honest, being single takes more courage and strength than being attached. The kind of societal pressure you have to deal with being single can be very overwhelming.... Really admire Brenda for being open and real about this even though its not easy being the different one 😜👏
Brenda with bangs OML💯💯💯😍❤️❤️❤️
Totally relatable coming from someone who hasnt date for the past 21 years of my life. Its okay.
I was so single back then till i met my husband, he is my first love when I'm already in my late 20s. Before him, i have been thru a few dates but none were compatible or they just ghosted me after a few times going out. Enough of letting myself down and heartbreaks, I stopped dating for 8 years. That 8 years made me love my independence more and i grew into a stronger person. Then he came along and accepted me for me.
omg can relate so much !!!!!!!!! :”) you just put my thoughts into words, so if anyone asks why i’m single i can sent them the link to this video hahaha
As a much older guy, i really think you should not let the experience of other people dictate your life. You are at an age when you should really be out experiencing the different facets of life. Make some mistakes, break your heart, break a few other people's heart. No one is born intelligent. We only become intelligent after more experiences. Hope you be able to live your life. Because I do regret that I haven done as much as I should have. Its not about fulfilling societal norms, its about living a life where you feel all the strong emotions happy and sad, both good and bad, and these tell you are truly truly living.
Thank you Leah for being such a great host and friend to Brenda which made her spoke about such private matters so comfortably in front of the camera & as an individual, I feel like I can 100% relate to Brenda because I feel like I’m just the guy version of her. However, since she’s slightly more reserved towards meeting people online, maybe dropping this comment would help? hahahahaha 🙃 To whoever that can win her heart in the future, you’re really lucky!! Please take care of this angel 😇
Omg can we have a speed dating episode for Brenda? Like the Jubilee's 1 vs 20 series. Simping candidates or their friends submit applications and Leah screen through them. And Brenda does speed dating w them and eliminate them along the way
lol can u not. maybe if do the speeddating, all the guys will run away... see ur face also buay tahan.
@@peachesandcream8975 nani why you so fierce ah? Did I offend you? Take a chill pill man
lool you didnt watch the video meh? Need to be casual organic meeting than can. Speed dating got the same pressure as dating apps eh
my parents divorce when i was 1 years old so i understand how Brenda feels because its never easy to have to go thru all this as a child and growing up like this isnt what we want but at the same time its also something we cant stop..
reading through the comments, i’m glad that there are people who are in the same situation as me. as someone who is surrounded by couples and always being a lightbulb, it sometimes affects me and hurts my self confidence, and there are certain times when i’m like sad i can’t find anyone to go places with? idk like i hesitate when asking some of my attached friends out to certain places la. and the societal pressure is real when you are forever single at 26 yo. but i’m rly like “don’t have lor” “if it happens it happens” and wanting to start as friends as well. have tried apps for quite a while and i rly think this is not for me. i feel like ppl in seemingly happy relationships don’t believe that i am rly okay being single, and it makes things so annoying, bc i feel like they kinda pity me..? i don’t have high expectations, but i just feel like a relationship should add to my quality of life and not hurt it.
Thanks Brenda for being real and vulnerable in sharing with us. Thanks Leah for being a great host and friend :D
One of my favorite movie is Never Been Kissed so I really feel for Brenda. I hope for Brenda to be happy always. One doesn't need to have a life partner to feel happy, in fact the way the world is now, it's perfectly fine to be single! Brenda you seemed a beautiful person inside and out! You deserve the best!
The interviewer is very non judge mental.. I like her style of going in deeper to ask Brenda questions. Brenda is also very matured, finding peace with herself. I can tell that she has pondered these similar qns herself and finally found the answers deep within herself
Looking great brenda!don’t stop being the happy person you are! Just go with the flow,I was single for 24 years before meeting my fiancée
Can relate here too. Been single for 24 years and I'm still happily single and not rushing to jump into something unless it feels right. And I've spent 22/23 years learning to love myself. It's so important to do that before u can afford to give some love to others =)
Interesting viewpoint
So true on being alone for so long will make one realize they can do most things alone and find some peace in it.
Brenda seems like a very genuine person and I really admire and like her for that. I'm sure there are still many sides to her that she doesn't show on screen and even to others. I can relate to her being guarded and more of a face to face conversations kind of person. I'm also all bi myself but it doesn't really bother me that much. Just go with the flow and I hope you will happen to find that someone for you! BTW, Brenda with bangs is really cute 😁
Thanks Brenda for sharing your story with us! Honestly there’s nothing wrong with being picky. Many of us rush to get into relationships just because that’s the societal norm and some of us are afraid of being alone and just settle for something lesser. You do you girl! Btw where is Brenda’s blazer frommm it’s gorgeous!!
This world needs more people like Brenda, thank you for sharing, I think people should take relationship and marriage more seriously, date with purpose, and have kids only when you're ready
Well i vibe with the same "not actively searching" but if it happens it happens.
Always good to start from self-love and then we can learn to appreciate everything else more. Cheers
exact same thoughts and relationship status with Brenda. Thank you for sharing, its relatable, e.g when people ask me why am I single all the time.
Thank you Brenda, its good to know that I'm not the only single af person, but single by choice. Been single for 30 years since birth, and just like Brenda I've grown to become very ok with being alone. I'm also not ok with knowing someone with the intention to date, i prefer making friends and know them inside out first. And family issues definitely affected me greatly. This video is so so so relatable, and so so so comforting.
brenda looks so different in this video! such a cute look
Leah is such a nice person to talk to, can tell she really listens and her replies are so genuine and sincere🌻
Brenda & Leah are two of my favourite tsl personalities! Love their authenticity💕😍
"once youve been single for very long you just rlly become v independent" YASSSS totally feel ya
i’d love to hear more about other people’s experiences on having divorced parents, personally i do and sometimes it really does affect my mental health
I seriously didn’t know that Brenda was single! She’s so beautiful and like a ray of sunshine
I relate so so well with Brenda given the same background, experience and thoughts. Thank you Brenda for sharing. It makes me know that I’m not alone and I don’t have to be bothered by it? ☺️
Brenda and I has like the same views on relationship. Feels good to know that im not alone
I never clicked on a video faster in my life when i saw the title when it involves Brenda... Hahaha
But jokes aside, i can really relate to her about going through parents divorcing for kids at such a young age. Seeing your parents from being so loving to them slowly drifting apart and the kids having to be 'messengers' between the both of them, its' really painful and we have those thoughts of putting the blame on ourselves.
We should definitely have more conversation about how these affect these kids mentally because personally like what she mentioned, we were forced to grow up especially being the older sibling.
Yeah same thoughts.I think children who are going through the process of divorce need support which is so hard to find.
Omg Brenda so cute 🥺💕
when you've been single for so long, you're the most self-sufficient and independent person there is. word. #mylifestory
love Brenda for being so relatable and finding the words to voice out my thoughts. have had the exact same thoughts but could never find the words to express them perfectly. thank you. 🥰
Oh gosh! Brenda is I and I is Brenda!😅 Thanks Brenda for being the voice of the people who are in the same boat as you! Much love to you girl!!😘
Can definitely relate to Brenda, it’s great to have a different perspective. You know what you want and there’s nothing wrong with that
loved hearing brenda's pov!
Brenda is a very strong and independent woman!! It's okay brenda! I'm already 30 and I didn't have any relationships too. 😂
❤️
I relate to Brenda sooo much wow especially the dating app, having high expectations and also the quote ‘if it happens, it happens’
Brendaaa🥺 u r exactly me!! 😭 I've been single for my entire life. And the reasons and thoughts u have about is exactly the same for mee 😭 maybe more than that.
I enjoy being single but i like someone to be with and have fun like best friends but I fear to fall in love. A lot reasons maahnn.
every sentence u told in this video is the thing i say to people when they ask why you're single 🥺🤧
Would love to see a longer chat how children of divorced parents is affected by it and shapes their view on marriage and building family ☺️
Brenda seems really sweet and genuine and more so, confident. And to be honest, relationships feel like the norm nowdays that a lack of it is being seen as different. Rather than the term different, I would say that I respect her for having standards. Rather than saying that she is afraid to be vulnerable, it just shows that she is comfortable with herself and will only be with a guy she can be herself with and not because she needs a companion. Respect❤️
My parents' divorce taught me never to get married if I don't have a house to run away to in case my husband becomes abusive and a prenuptial to prevent being trapped in said marriage. I never used to think a pre-nuptial necessary but it really sucks if you have to trade the roof over your head for your freedom.
You get me. I will do a prenup too and I will also not have multiple marriage with kids from different men. Just one marriage and one set of kids is enough for me.
Sameeeee totally can relate to her when she say “everyone experience it when she’s havnt experience it yet” stay strong and love yourself 🙆♀️ wishing all the best in future~
I’m so glad Brenda shared her experience because I’m in a similar position as her
I really like the way she put her thoughts into word. Can never be me🤣
I really love this episode!! ✨ Brenda you're amazing! Thank you for sharing your experiences with us and emphasising on the importance of independence and self-love. I really needed this 🥺
never nod my head so much in zula video. totally could relate. love you brenda!
Brenda is amazing for sharing her story!! This girl is going to places!!! 💪💪💪
Im around the same position as brenda man. Like, having to be with a guy who asked me to be his gf but after a few weeks, throw me off and say he needed more time to have this relationship off for a while but in the end, liking my friend instead. And bruh that hurt and am being traumatised for being like a used rubbish just hits me everytime.
I can totally relate to all the things brenda said about how a past experience and a broken family affected her. And also that i can’t do dating app too which is exactly what brenda explained and previously i couldn’t really explain why, now i know why and how to explain it. Thanks brenda and ask zula for the insight too!
Brenda is good, she dont have to rush herself or pressure herself to match the world standards
zula should make a podcast. love this content thank u leah and brenda❤️
Can totally relate tbh, parents divorced at 15/16, never really been in a relationship. Totally agree with y'all when you say being a complete person and happy with ourselves. Hope Brenda meets someone nice soon☺️😉
I can totally relate to Brenda about dating apps. I've also only had a relationship for 4 months and then stayed single after, and people keep telling me I'm picky but I really am just looking for someone I can click with. Also agree with the need to start as friends first and dating apps are not for me.
Brenda, you're not alone~ Thank you for sharing your story. ♡♡
Really enjoyed this ep! I resonate with many of the points she brought up 😢 not to pressure but she could try bumble because you can set the criteria to just looking for friends! Speaking as someone who used bumble before a little :)
Thanks Brenda for sharing your story...
I can totally relate to you as my experience with yours is 90% similar...
I'm fine with being single for life, but if someone wants to walk in, I'm open to it...
Certainly F2F and as friends first... Dating app doesn't work for me either...
brenda is even more cuter with her bangs!
It’s okay Brenda! One day it will be your turn!! Being single for my whole life made me relate to 100% to whatever you’ve said and made me realise that I am not the only one having those kind of mindsets.
One thing I realise after being alone for so long is to take having a partner as like a bonus. Make big plans for yourself. Assuming that you gonna be alone forever, plan when wanna buy house, buy car and save up for it. Those in relationship can split the cost with their parter, but singles can’t. Sooooo... sad lah HAHAAHHA
Jiayou Brenda 💜
Aww Brenda!!! I can really relate to her :) i too have similar experiences, esp the family situation and the no experience. me having not much desire to be in one, my group of friends who are mostly single (and likewise no experience also) & my asexuality also contribute to me being very very okay with being single. thanks for sharing brenda!
Don't settle Brenda! Keep doing you!
thank u brenda for sharing so wholeheartedly!! 🌼 totally relatable!
I liked the sound effects in this video.
Brenda totally speaks my thoughts 200%
Thank you Brenda for sharing your story! I think Leah's idea is a good one, maybe you can invite divorced couples to share their view as a parent/couple? Perhaps invite their children too. But yeah quite a touch subject to open up to the public since it can be pretty personal. I think you guys did it before but it's just the children. Perhaps you can invite the parents too? Also PS: Leah's such a great host! :)
Totally understand where Brenda come from. I’m another version of Brenda . Brenda you’re cute :)
Friggin solid friend this one
I love Brenda! :) Can relate to her so much! I suddenly remembered the episode where she was taken out on a blind date, and Fauzi was like "Brenda, is it i am giving away my child"?
I agree on the point of being whole before finding someone. But when we found that person, we start to rely one and another more. And if we fall out of love after that, are we whole again or will we be whole again as a person?
Brenda is so kind to the nasty comments. Hope this energy rub off on everyone on the web. 🙌
totally can relate to her, u go girl ❤️
Can totally empathise because I'm also the messenger...between parents. Divorce is really something we should talk more about - for the children. And also maybe can include free legal help and counselling options.
guurrrrlll my comment was featured HAHAHAHHAHA loved this H2H with Brenda!!
Brenda so pretty!!!!!! 😍