Take your FREE Am I a People Pleaser Quiz? Discover Your Type. krisreece.com/am-i-a-people-pleaser/ What’s My Temperament? FREE Guide krisreece.com/whats-my-temperament/
As a Christian, I used to be a people pleaser for a long time. Well I learned the hard way that is impossible and not a good idea. People will use you as a doormat. Even other Christians will walk over you.
Yoh guys, the way I've been a people-pleaser for so long and when I heard Kris say "you're not even sure what matters most to you because you don't know who you are outside of people's expectations", I felt like crying. It seems so impossible for me to even get to the stage of God-pleasing. And the funny thing is I've been so close to God ever since 2023. But only to realise now that I have been pleasing people more than God, actually scares me 😞
Yeah, we are full of unhelped developmemtal trauma and anxious, insecúre attachment And misinterpreting the real words, possibly for monetary reasons too. God, I so do need help!
Christians are taught that we have to be the peacemakers. The Bible also says to keep peace as much as lieth in you. So there is a point people need told no. Jesus threw out those in the temple selling things. We have to fight for peace sometimes and it stirs up conflict. The truth hurts. Peace comes from STRONG boundaries which has the word no in it.
@FirstLast-zk5ow I choose to be a God pleaser instead of a people pleaser. Jesus, was not a people pleaser bowing down to the desires of man. He pleased His Father and sometimes it made people mad at him. Loving others does not mean that we have to give in to them and give them what they want. We have to rely on the Holy Spirit to show us what the will of God is in the situation and then do that. If people get angry at us, oh well. I pray for them and move on.
Unfortunately, people pleasing is very harmful to yourself and opens the doors to abuse. Years of accepting emotional and physical abuse lead to self destruction.
I so wish I had seen this video 10 years ago my life would be so different. I’ve lived my life pleasing others while ignoring myself. I live in constant regret being taken advantage of all my life.
practice saying NO, I cant do that; NO im busy; NO thats not something im interested in...say it via looking in the mirror!! until youre confident...then practice on a trusted friend. if they give you an excuse ie but then I wont b able to....then I cant.... well thats not very nice of you....Then you say Well thats my decision and you can decide how to handle this issue in another way. Have a nice day! bye!
THANK YOU. NO LONGER TRYING TO FIT INTO THE CLIQUES. FROM FAMILY TO CHURCHES....HARD BEING A LONER. ...TIRED OF BEING REJECTED. I AM WHO GOD CREATED ME. TD
Have you ever considered that God did you a favor by cutting toxic people out of your life? I left the organized church years ago when I found out my pastors were gossiping about me whenever I went to them for counseling. I have found very good friends at conferences that focus on the Kingdom and evangelism.
I used to be a people pleaser, but then after being used by people who I thought were my true friends, I started isolating myself. Avoiding the conflict I wonder if it was the right thing to do because at times it gets lonely, but reading into my Bible more everyday gives me confirmation.
God has gotten me and my wife to leave so many people in our lives. People who just used us. Nowadays We’d rather be lonely than have people in our life that just intend to use us. I have one really great friend…it’s enough!
@@steveindorset my aunt recently said, "if you find one good friend in your lifetime, you are blessed". I'm beginning to see that we don't need 4 like the movies and TV portray.
There are times when I agree with someone just to please, then discernment comes in and I listen. I’ve learned honesty is kindness and I no longer people please like I used to.
I don't like the word "nice". I use kind instead. And I am definitely not a people pleaser. I refuse to change myself to please or make anyone comfortable. Thanks Kris for bringing this issue to the forefront. God Bless.
What a coincidence! This video came just right. I'm trying not to be like Saul anymore, the people pleaser. I want to be like David, a man after God's own heart.
Came by people pleasing honestly, was the scapegoat child in a narcissist home and it helped me survive but life changes and we must too. Learned behaviors don’t always serve for a lifetime. It’s good to take stock and readjust, or do what pop-spirituality calls shadow work. And as adults, we aren’t driven by habitual behaviors but by commitments, like the commitment to Jesus and all that he teaches us. He helped me survive my childhood too. I was not alone. Am not alone. We, who love Christ, are never really alone.
I can relate to this 1000%. I was also the scapegoat and that groomed me to be an ideal supply to narcissistic friends, boyfriends, bosses and coworkers. Even Christian narcissists at church. But no more. God woke me up and has been helping me heal and do a complete renewing of my mind!
@@PrettyIndependent1 Ditto! The hardest part was the Church People. I never knew that for supply they are going to use the holiest of Holy places as well. What a shame!!!
This was so good & straight to the point. Praise God. I need help in this area quite badly. I’ve gotten better but my knee jerk reaction to people is to be fake nice to keep the peace at my own detriment often times so I’ve been isolating. I’m so grateful for this teaching ❤❤❤
Experiencing this right now in my church of all places. I'm on the verge of leaving my dysfunctional church. Five generations of my family have gone there. I pray God will let me know if I should move on to a different church after all these years.
Everything you have said is me; I have just escaped from a Narc and having tried to keep Him happy, I have ended up being unhappy with ME. It's time to learn to love what God sees in me and I believe that's GOD. Because GOD is within ME. He is so BIG, the earth is His footstall. YET He is small enough to fit inside of US. GOD is every where.
There were times when I compromised the word of God by my silence just so others who claim to be Christians, won't get mad. When I stopped my silence it was proven I was right, they did get angry with me, however I didn't care because God means more to me than the friendships of those who don't care what God thinks.
I've been a people pleaser And the ugly part of people pleasing is it seems to be humble but deep down it's all pride People pleasers please others not because they love them but they need validation and recognition ( self- focused & pride) from them Good people pleasing ( comes out of love) Bad people pleasing ( striving for recognition and validation ( self focused and pride) this should be avoided) We need to ask god for discernment and wisdom to stop bad people pleasing.
I believe I am a people pleaser and it hurts me inside, feel like I always have to be overly nice and accommodating, always afraid of what people think, always saying im sorry for the silliest things, I am exhausted and wonder God why do I act like this, it is tormenting, yet I have no problem saying no. Thank you for this information.
@@preacherbarbie A world full of monsters masquerading as humans? The OP said nothing about having bad people in her life for you to make this comment, and you just told someone else they were unkind for saying there are a lot of narcissists in the world and that’s it’s scary and easier to stay single.
Great topic Kris, I love your visual aid to show how damaging it is to be a people pleaser. It seems a person will have little left of their personality, once they go down the rabbit hole of being a people pleaser. Please pray for me as I still am tempted to go into the people pleaser mode, even though I know how damaging & dysfunctional this way of life is!
Everyone: listening to her wise words Me: nervously watching her take out one Jenga piece at a time, just waiting for it to fall like 👀 What a PERFECT analogy!! Scared me enough to pay attention and rethink my people-pleasing habits!! 😂🙏🏼 Thanks for sharing!
Forgive them they not not what they are doing. This sets you free so that you can not only continue but become a light in the darkness. An eternal living example.
Amen amen thank you this is the answer to my suffering and lifetime of struggle 🙏🙏 You are a blessing! And a model for a strong Christian woman that we so need in this world!
I started people pleasing when I said no to one daughter to help the other and vice versa . I said say yes to avoid conflict because if I said no they didn’t call me and were mad. As a result I was doing so many things I was not happy to do and was made to feel guilty for not helping all the time. I felt I was suffocating. Now I say yes when it’s convenient and accept the times when they don’t call. Sadly only my girls do this not my boys I sometimes wonder why this happened. I am sad a lot of the time because I feel I didn’t raise them to be respectful of my time.
You are so right Kris and what I see in it is nothing but confusion when people don't even know what they believe or what to stand for because they're always in agreement with everybody else so that they can be nice. You could also call that a form of godliness there are always people pleasers!!
Amazing video. Hits home. Also I rarely comment so since I’m doing this one I want to add that yours is one of a few channels I found that truly gets it. I thank you for all of your videos and I look forward to what’s to come. Stay blessed.
Thanks for posting Kris. When I hear something like this, I want to help fill in the gap of what's not been said on such a topic. My question is, how can we be people pleasers AND God pleasers at the same time?? What does that look like? It's not so much calling people out on their mistakes, but rather the idea having positive conversations on how the other person can clean themselves up before Christ. As most believers know, it's not what I can do for myself, but it's what Christ has done for me, and in me. I bring this up because this is the kind of conversation I have a lot, with my co-workers. The idea is to let God work the details out, not I'll make myself better with my decisions.
I m nit a ppl pleaser but l love to see ppl happy and they took that for weakness unitl it came time to stand on GOD'S word...l became an enemy and l rather be that to them...instead of an enemy of GOD...I CHOOSE JESUS😊 although it is hard...l love the Lord❤
Many times my ex wife who professed to be Christian, asked me to do things that were against my values. She was very upset with me saying "NO" to her. Never give into these people, you will regret it and give up many things to your loss. It is just not worth it.
Striving to be a Christ like person does mean that we must generally be more caring, compassionate and empathetic. However, we are also told to be wise and discerning too. Goodness and kindness will always attract those who strive to exploit and manipulate us and so we have to learn to distinguish between the good and bad around us. It's also not a bad idea to pull back and away from people we detect are trying to use us. We must be as gentle as doves but as wise as serpents.
I guess a lot of us do this, one way that the narcissist has always manipulated me, is by saying, ‘oh I thought you were a Christian,’ if you say no to them, or don’t want to do what they are asking, they will just throw that Christianity in your face. I have learned however to live more by logic, and not by my feelings, and emotions.
Yes, we are to please the Lord, but it not excuse of from sowing what we want to reap and we still got to earn the respect we want to receive. If we act in unloving ways, we will be held accountable. So to know how to please the Lord without going about bad acing and also not use filter when speaking and not avoid the silence is golden moments by breaking silence.
Recently stopped going to unbiblical church building church and seeking a house church. Freedom with God and away from toxic traditions and compromised environments of lost believers...And I grew up that way. Thanks for your advice and God Bless Kris Reece. 🧭📖🙏😊
Part of being salt and light is living out your faith in front of others. I'm an empath, so I struggle with people pleasing. However, I don't want to hurt my testimony by going the other direction.
Empath is part of the new age movement and it is not biblical teaching. Its like saying you have emotions and no one else does. Overly emotional is also a boundaries issue where you might lack boundaries.
Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! Isaiah 5:20
You don't mention the root cause of the problem. People pleasers are adults who are desperate for the love, approval and validation their parents never gave them as children.
@@laurietegen1819 You're not "idolatrous". It's called mom and dad didn't give you what you very much needed as a child. To feel love and praise from their parents -- a child needs it as much as rules and discipline and guidance. We often spend our adult lives trying to fill that hole that was left in us from our childhoods. Of course she has a hyper religious perspective and is going to try to ram that in and ignore simple psychology.
As a person that use to be very friendly, wanted to be more social, care what others say about me, bro i had to put all that to a end, I'm just so tired of people wanting to step on me, used me, try me, etc. been like this from 12 yrs old - now i had to learn the hard way that this ia not worth no more, it's even worse when you're giving a lie that really didn't make it seem that way (from religious housing) so now in my own experience I'm now only a pleaser to God and only nice and acceptable to those who actually deserve it! Why i don't be around people my own age, neighbors, parties, activities, with my own dang family i step away from them Bec at the end do they care and think for me?! Nope! The main thing in life for me is God, my art support, money. And I'm putting these in my heart but not as narcissistic way
Thanks for all the helpful insight. re: people pleasing, not guilty! not guilty of: changing yourself to keep others happy changing your values to fit in allowing others to trample on your boundaries in order to be liked by them agreeing when you disagree apologizing when you didn’t do something wrong taking blame when it isn’t yours taking blame to keep the peace However, guilty of: silence when I should have spoken out forgetting and forgiving when I should have solely forgiven assuming the best of others, even when they’ve shown their worst too many times "Guilty" of Christianity and the particular nuances it presents in dealing with narcissists. I haven't figured it out perfectly, but I'm no longer naive
Romans 10:9 (NKJV) that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
I am so happy to have found this message! I’m dealing with people pleasing now at my current employer. I’ve been asked to do things that go against my values and integrity. I finally decided to no longer do it. When I am standing up for myself and for GOD I feel soo much better about myself. I am divinely guided and protected. Thank you!🦋
That's right, the same people who you work so hard to please will see you as a weakling who's easy to push around, and they actually think LESS of you for it! There's an old saying, "Some people will s*** on you, then kick you because you smell bad." It's true.
Yes , God's Apostle of this age , Kriss Reese Godly sent Apostle to this world . May the spirit of Heaven continue to empower you and bless you forever , may the glittering light of Heaven surround you well. Hallelujah Amen .
THANKS FOR YOUR VEDIO'S I HAVE ENJOYED WATCHING SOME OF THEM . I BELIEVE YOUR PERSPECTIVE IS VERY HONEST AND HELPFUL. BY THE WAY LIKE THE HAIR VERY NICE. MAY GOD ALWAYS BE WITH YOU IN MAKING YOUR VEDIO'S AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.👍👍🙂🇺🇲❣️
When one is carnal and not spiritual so they lack discernment of judging with righteous judgment so they just keep pleasing the flesh for the spirit they perceive not. Also a testament of where and what point that believer’s faith is
This is how I was, always wanting to please people. As I get older, I'm getting away from that garbage. I'm not giving up my self-eThissteem and who I am, just to appease some dimwit, or to keep the peace. When I get to the point where I have a healthy self-esteem for myself, then I can totally put these people to the curb
My identity is in Christ alone. No one can fill that space but God. I was called ugly things because I said no , or that it's wronng.Please pray for me to stay in God's will. I can't change anyone but myself through Christ.
Take your FREE Am I a People Pleaser Quiz? Discover Your Type.
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What’s My Temperament? FREE Guide
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❤goD. Billss. You❤❤❤❤
❤❤❤GoD Bills. You. MORe❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Please send me
Blessings!!
🙏♥️🙏
good bless you
Former people pleaser. Life begins when you live to please God.
This is very true
Hallelujah! God centred not people centred
How did you do it? I'm a people pleaser which stems from my childhood. My dad was very strict and I could never trust myself.
Amen!
As a Christian, I used to be a people pleaser for a long time. Well I learned the hard way that is impossible and not a good idea. People will use you as a doormat. Even other Christians will walk over you.
I’m currently going through healing from that. Christians can be abusive & selfish too!
Not everyone in the henhouse is a chicken........ lots of snakes/foxes etc. Best place for them to hide.
Totally agree even it's worse when it's family....why I stay to myself
Yoh guys, the way I've been a people-pleaser for so long and when I heard Kris say "you're not even sure what matters most to you because you don't know who you are outside of people's expectations", I felt like crying. It seems so impossible for me to even get to the stage of God-pleasing. And the funny thing is I've been so close to God ever since 2023. But only to realise now that I have been pleasing people more than God, actually scares me 😞
Sadly, most of us in the Church have been trained to be people pleasers to "keep the peace."
Yeah, we are full of unhelped developmemtal trauma and anxious, insecúre attachment And misinterpreting the real words, possibly for monetary reasons too. God, I so do need help!
Yes, especially being nice at all costs because “it’s Christian”.
Christians are taught that we have to be the peacemakers. The Bible also says to keep peace as much as lieth in you. So there is a point people need told no. Jesus threw out those in the temple selling things. We have to fight for peace sometimes and it stirs up conflict. The truth hurts. Peace comes from STRONG boundaries which has the word no in it.
I take it then that you don't want to be a child of God? Matthew 5:9
@FirstLast-zk5ow I choose to be a God pleaser instead of a people pleaser. Jesus, was not a people pleaser bowing down to the desires of man. He pleased His Father and sometimes it made people mad at him. Loving others does not mean that we have to give in to them and give them what they want. We have to rely on the Holy Spirit to show us what the will of God is in the situation and then do that. If people get angry at us, oh well. I pray for them and move on.
Unfortunately, people pleasing is very harmful to yourself and opens the doors to abuse. Years of accepting emotional and physical abuse lead to self destruction.
So true
I repent Lord, for not serving You first!
When I repented of the "fear (idolization) of man", I received complete deliverance from this very harmful, self-destructive tendency! Praise God! 🕊️
I so wish I had seen this video 10 years ago my life would be so different. I’ve lived my life pleasing others while ignoring myself. I live in constant regret being taken advantage of all my life.
Totally Agreed.
practice saying NO, I cant do that; NO im busy; NO thats not something im interested in...say it via looking in the mirror!! until youre confident...then practice on a trusted friend. if they give you an excuse ie but then I wont b able to....then I cant.... well thats not very nice of you....Then you say Well thats my decision and you can decide how to handle this issue in another way. Have a nice day! bye!
Better late than never as it is said... When you wake up it's morning...
You know it!!! Very Well Said. @@Lauren-vd4qe
Don’t worry, you’re so not Alone in that situation!
The people I have been the kindest to have been the ones who have caused me the most grief. Not worth it. I please myself and God only.
It’s actually the craziest thing ay
Recognize ->repent-> resolve-> rebuild-> reject
Don't try to please others when you don't agree.
Be nice, respect, then walk away from them.
THANK YOU. NO LONGER TRYING TO FIT INTO THE CLIQUES. FROM FAMILY TO CHURCHES....HARD BEING A LONER. ...TIRED OF BEING REJECTED. I AM WHO GOD CREATED ME. TD
Good for you. Don't sell yourself short.
Amen 🙏
Hallelujah! I’ve stopped caring if people like me
Or not
Have you ever considered that God did you a favor by cutting toxic people out of your life? I left the organized church years ago when I found out my pastors were gossiping about me whenever I went to them for counseling. I have found very good friends at conferences that focus on the Kingdom and evangelism.
I used to be a people pleaser, but then after being used by people who I thought were my true friends, I started isolating myself. Avoiding the conflict I wonder if it was the right thing to do because at times it gets lonely, but reading into my Bible more everyday gives me confirmation.
Same here. I grow more in love with Jesus, the Word of God! Very selective of who I allow into my inner circle.
Yeesss!!! The Bible itself will expose those so called "perfect Christians" as mere mortals just like everyone else!!!
God has gotten me and my wife to leave so many people in our lives. People who just used us. Nowadays We’d rather be lonely than have people in our life that just intend to use us. I have one really great friend…it’s enough!
@@steveindorset my aunt always says, you are blessed if you leave this earth with one good friend.
@@steveindorset my aunt recently said, "if you find one good friend in your lifetime, you are blessed". I'm beginning to see that we don't need 4 like the movies and TV portray.
There are times when I agree with someone just to please, then discernment comes in and I listen. I’ve learned honesty is kindness and I no longer people please like I used to.
I'm so glad to hear that.
God never meant for any of us to be alike...he created every person to be special and unique.
I don't like the word "nice". I use kind instead. And I am definitely not a people pleaser. I refuse to change myself to please or make anyone comfortable. Thanks Kris for bringing this issue to the forefront. God Bless.
People pleasing is not good. Some people are not what you think anyhow. Stand up for yourself.
What a coincidence! This video came just right. I'm trying not to be like Saul anymore, the people pleaser. I want to be like David, a man after God's own heart.
Came by people pleasing honestly, was the scapegoat child in a narcissist home and it helped me survive but life changes and we must too. Learned behaviors don’t always serve for a lifetime. It’s good to take stock and readjust, or do what pop-spirituality calls shadow work. And as adults, we aren’t driven by habitual behaviors but by commitments, like the commitment to Jesus and all that he teaches us. He helped me survive my childhood too. I was not alone. Am not alone. We, who love Christ, are never really alone.
I can relate to this 1000%. I was also the scapegoat and that groomed me to be an ideal supply to narcissistic friends, boyfriends, bosses and coworkers. Even Christian narcissists at church. But no more. God woke me up and has been helping me heal and do a complete renewing of my mind!
@@PrettyIndependent1 Ditto! The hardest part was the Church People. I never knew that for supply they are going to use the holiest of Holy places as well. What a shame!!!
Thank you 🙏🏾
Same story. Greets and May God bless you 😊
I totally understand, I use to know people like that even have household myself like that it's just mad crazy honestly
This was so good & straight to the point. Praise God. I need help in this area quite badly. I’ve gotten better but my knee jerk reaction to people is to be fake nice to keep the peace at my own detriment often times so I’ve been isolating. I’m so grateful for this teaching ❤❤❤
Same. I was done trying to please everyone a long time ago.
Amen. I’m tired. Just plain tired of it.🥴🙏🏻
As you get older you find that you don't even know what you want or where your boundaries are anymore since you've been people pleasing for so long.
I can relate!
Experiencing this right now in my church of all places. I'm on the verge of leaving my dysfunctional church. Five generations of my family have gone there. I pray God will let me know if I should move on to a different church after all these years.
Keep praying for guidance, sounds like you need a change.
@@rosalindr4975 Thank you. I will.
Everything you have said is me; I have just escaped from a Narc and having tried to keep Him happy, I have ended up being unhappy with ME. It's time to learn to love what God sees in me and I believe that's GOD.
Because GOD is within ME.
He is so BIG, the earth is His footstall.
YET He is small enough to fit inside of US.
GOD is every where.
There were times when I compromised the word of God by my silence just so others who claim to be Christians, won't get mad. When I stopped my silence it was proven I was right, they did get angry with me, however I didn't care because God means more to me than the friendships of those who don't care what God thinks.
I've been a people pleaser
And the ugly part of people pleasing is it seems to be humble but deep down it's all pride
People pleasers please others not because they love them but they need validation and recognition ( self- focused & pride) from them
Good people pleasing ( comes out of love)
Bad people pleasing ( striving for recognition and validation ( self focused and pride) this should be avoided)
We need to ask god for discernment and wisdom to stop bad people pleasing.
I believe I am a people pleaser and it hurts me inside, feel like I always have to be overly nice and accommodating, always afraid of what people think, always saying im sorry for the silliest things, I am exhausted and wonder God why do I act like this, it is tormenting, yet I have no problem saying no. Thank you for this information.
I understand how i feel it is tormenting!!!
You are a good soul with empathy who lives in a world full of monsters masquerading as humans. That's on them not you beloved. God Bless you🙏
@@preacherbarbie
A world full of monsters masquerading as humans? The OP said nothing about having bad people in her life for you to make this comment, and you just told someone else they were unkind for saying there are a lot of narcissists in the world and that’s it’s scary and easier to stay single.
Great topic Kris, I love your visual aid to show how damaging it is to be a people pleaser. It seems a person will have little left of their personality, once they go down the rabbit hole of being a people pleaser. Please pray for me as I still am tempted to go into the people pleaser mode, even though I know how damaging & dysfunctional this way of life is!
Everyone: listening to her wise words
Me: nervously watching her take out one Jenga piece at a time, just waiting for it to fall like 👀
What a PERFECT analogy!! Scared me enough to pay attention and rethink my people-pleasing habits!! 😂🙏🏼 Thanks for sharing!
I had enough of being nice I had enough of wise talk Had enough of trying to love my brother!!
Thank you Kris, I am coming from an extreme narsisist family. I can’t continue seriously
Forgive them they not not what they are doing.
This sets you free so that you can not only continue but become a light in the darkness.
An eternal living example.
I love your demonstration with the blocks.
Amen amen thank you this is the answer to my suffering and lifetime of struggle 🙏🙏 You are a blessing! And a model for a strong Christian woman that we so need in this world!
Love, love the way you speak truth! Your teachings should be part of church curriculums, especially new believers in Christ. ❤
As a child i was told to put up with evil and toxicity and don't let it bother me so i was prepped to become a people pleaser but God's changing me❤
I started people pleasing when I said no to one daughter to help the other and vice versa . I said say yes to avoid conflict because if I said no they didn’t call me and were mad. As a result I was doing so many things I was not happy to do and was made to feel guilty for not helping all the time. I felt I was suffocating. Now I say yes when it’s convenient and accept the times when they don’t call. Sadly only my girls do this not my boys I sometimes wonder why this happened. I am sad a lot of the time because I feel I didn’t raise them to be respectful of my time.
Wow. What an excellent analogy. Never thought of that! Thanks for sharing, Kris.
You are so right Kris and what I see in it is nothing but confusion when people don't even know what they believe or what to stand for because they're always in agreement with everybody else so that they can be nice. You could also call that a form of godliness there are always people pleasers!!
Amazing video. Hits home. Also I rarely comment so since I’m doing this one I want to add that yours is one of a few channels I found that truly gets it. I thank you for all of your videos and I look forward to what’s to come. Stay blessed.
Thanks for posting Kris. When I hear something like this, I want to help fill in the gap of what's not been said on such a topic. My question is, how can we be people pleasers AND God pleasers at the same time?? What does that look like? It's not so much calling people out on their mistakes, but rather the idea having positive conversations on how the other person can clean themselves up before Christ. As most believers know, it's not what I can do for myself, but it's what Christ has done for me, and in me. I bring this up because this is the kind of conversation I have a lot, with my co-workers. The idea is to let God work the details out, not I'll make myself better with my decisions.
I m nit a ppl pleaser but l love to see ppl happy and they took that for weakness unitl it came time to stand on GOD'S word...l became an enemy and l rather be that to them...instead of an enemy of GOD...I CHOOSE JESUS😊 although it is hard...l love the Lord❤
Many times my ex wife who professed to be Christian, asked me to do things that were against my values. She was very upset with me saying "NO" to her. Never give into these people, you will regret it and give up many things to your loss. It is just not worth it.
Kris keeping it real & telling it like it is.❤ Boundaries. Learn to say no.
I agree. She doesn't pull any punches
1. Recognize
2. Repent
3. Resolve
4. Rebuild
5. Reject
Thank you for the abstracts.
Thank you for this GOD BLESS YOU
Striving to be a Christ like person does mean that we must generally be more caring, compassionate and empathetic. However, we are also told to be wise and discerning too. Goodness and kindness will always attract those who strive to exploit and manipulate us and so we have to learn to distinguish between the good and bad around us. It's also not a bad idea to pull back and away from people we detect are trying to use us. We must be as gentle as doves but as wise as serpents.
I guess a lot of us do this, one way that the narcissist has always manipulated me, is by saying, ‘oh I thought you were a Christian,’ if you say no to them, or don’t want to do what they are asking, they will just throw that Christianity in your face.
I have learned however to live more by logic, and not by my feelings, and emotions.
Yes, we are to please the Lord, but it not excuse of from sowing what we want to reap and we still got to earn the respect we want to receive. If we act in unloving ways, we will be held accountable. So to know how to please the Lord without going about bad acing and also not use filter when speaking and not avoid the silence is golden moments by breaking silence.
Perfect timing! 😮😅 thanku! If i could like this post a million times i would.
Recently stopped going to unbiblical church building church and seeking a house church. Freedom with God and away from toxic traditions and compromised environments of lost believers...And I grew up that way.
Thanks for your advice and God Bless Kris Reece.
🧭📖🙏😊
Wow pretty epic
Wow, that was me….yes, Jesus Christ was the Way and the Life forward. God bless you Kris
been doing it all my life at the crumbling down phase
Amen Kris! Jesus is THE ONLY WAY to a complete and whole identity in HIM! This is a great video and prop is a fantastic anaology. Thank you
Maybe, but then please explain how to, and let us seek and do individually, in peace?
You are so beautiful! Thank you for teaching.
Part of being salt and light is living out your faith in front of others. I'm an empath, so I struggle with people pleasing. However, I don't want to hurt my testimony by going the other direction.
Empath is part of the new age movement and it is not biblical teaching.
Its like saying you have emotions and no one else does. Overly emotional is also a boundaries issue where you might lack boundaries.
Really heart touching, yes for sure Christians need this now a days. God bless you dear Kris.
Thank you so much.i have been a people pleaser my whole life and always felt like I was doing what God want me to do. I was so miserable.
إرضاء الناس غاية لا تدرك وإرضاء الرب غاية لا تترك. فأترك مالا يدرك وأدرك مالا يترك
Excellent speaker!
Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!
Isaiah 5:20
You don't mention the root cause of the problem. People pleasers are adults who are desperate for the love, approval and validation their parents never gave them as children.
Totally agree. I think she oversimplified it & was too harsh! I don't consider myself "idolatrous" because I'm trying to find love from people.
@@laurietegen1819 You're not "idolatrous". It's called mom and dad didn't give you what you very much needed as a child. To feel love and praise from their parents -- a child needs it as much as rules and discipline and guidance.
We often spend our adult lives trying to fill that hole that was left in us from our childhoods. Of course she has a hyper religious perspective and is going to try to ram that in and ignore simple psychology.
Thank you !
@@laurietegen1819 ♥️
True love only comes from the source of love and that’s the Lord Jesus Christ
Nice teaching! Thank you very much. Greetings from Costa Rica.
As a person that use to be very friendly, wanted to be more social, care what others say about me, bro i had to put all that to a end, I'm just so tired of people wanting to step on me, used me, try me, etc. been like this from 12 yrs old - now i had to learn the hard way that this ia not worth no more, it's even worse when you're giving a lie that really didn't make it seem that way (from religious housing) so now in my own experience I'm now only a pleaser to God and only nice and acceptable to those who actually deserve it! Why i don't be around people my own age, neighbors, parties, activities, with my own dang family i step away from them Bec at the end do they care and think for me?! Nope! The main thing in life for me is God, my art support, money. And I'm putting these in my heart but not as narcissistic way
So need this just learn how to stop pleasing people! I am here now! Please pray for me!
Remember it doesn’t matter if people like you! It’s pleasing God. Kindness but doesn’t mean
Door mat.
Thanks for all the helpful insight.
re: people pleasing, not guilty!
not guilty of:
changing yourself to keep others happy
changing your values to fit in
allowing others to trample on your boundaries in order to be liked by them
agreeing when you disagree
apologizing when you didn’t do something wrong
taking blame when it isn’t yours
taking blame to keep the peace
However, guilty of:
silence when I should have spoken out
forgetting and forgiving when I should have solely forgiven
assuming the best of others, even when they’ve shown their worst too many times
"Guilty" of Christianity and the particular nuances it presents in dealing with narcissists.
I haven't figured it out perfectly, but I'm no longer naive
Brilliantly taught
I really like the visualization to support the message.
Romans 10:9 (NKJV)
that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
THIS IS SOOOOOOO POWERFUL AND TRUE, I REALLY AND TRULY LOVE THIS TEACHINGS, I BELIEVE THIS TEACHINGS TO BE A DIVINE MANDATE, SHALOM.
Thank you Minister Reece God bless you ❤️🙏🏾😇
I am so happy to have found this message! I’m dealing with people pleasing now at my current employer. I’ve been asked to do things that go against my values and integrity. I finally decided to no longer do it. When I am standing up for myself and for GOD I feel soo much better about myself. I am divinely guided and protected. Thank you!🦋
Thank you for this. So straight to the point and powerful ❤
I learned this lesson 😌 at 21 years old dear
Well trained by my narcissistic mother, thanks Mam. It's taken decades to shake off. Thanks Kris. xxx
You are a woman of my heart
Wow!!! You have just described my LIFE
多謝！
That's right, the same people who you work so hard to please will see you as a weakling who's easy to push around, and they actually think LESS of you for it! There's an old saying, "Some people will s*** on you, then kick you because you smell bad." It's true.
Very well explained! Thank you! Very helpul, God bless you and your ministry! 🥰
Yes , God's Apostle of this age , Kriss Reese Godly sent Apostle to this world . May the spirit of Heaven continue to empower you and bless you forever , may the glittering light of Heaven surround you well. Hallelujah Amen .
Thank you for the reminder. God Bless you
THANKS FOR YOUR VEDIO'S I HAVE ENJOYED WATCHING SOME OF THEM . I BELIEVE YOUR PERSPECTIVE IS VERY HONEST AND HELPFUL. BY THE WAY LIKE THE HAIR VERY NICE. MAY GOD ALWAYS BE WITH YOU IN MAKING YOUR VEDIO'S AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.👍👍🙂🇺🇲❣️
Kris, love your channel, just came across it today. Thank you for God's perspective for solutions in a challenging world. God bless you
That`s how going to work is. It`s so tiresome dealing with people. I need to retire. Amen
Psalms 126:3
The LORD hath done great things for us; whereof we are glad.
True what she says
This is one of the best videos I have seen. I am very visual and you describe things so well. Thank you! ❤️
This was convicting. Thank you!
Only please God
Thank you! "Stop pleasing people. Start pleasing GOD!"
I regretted it took me a long time to realize that.
Me too.But it's better to be late than never.
This is where I’m at now.
i appreciate you.
I am learning so much from these videos! Thank you!
When one is carnal and not spiritual so they lack discernment of judging with righteous judgment so they just keep pleasing the flesh for the spirit they perceive not.
Also a testament of where and what point that believer’s faith is
i just didn't want to hurt their feelings, when I was younger
Great illustration and message! Bravo 👏
This is how I was, always wanting to please people. As I get older, I'm getting away from that garbage. I'm not giving up my self-eThissteem and who I am, just to appease some dimwit, or to keep the peace. When I get to the point where I have a healthy self-esteem for myself, then I can totally put these people to the curb
Wow!!!! With the Jenga blocks. Truth. Great illustrations. So helpful 🙏
I have the AHA moment when I left the Word of Faith, prosperity gospel.
My identity is in Christ alone. No one can fill that space but God. I was called ugly things because I said no , or that it's wronng.Please pray for me to stay in God's will. I can't change anyone but myself through Christ.