Why parents always think children GROWN CHILDREN trying to have a proper conversation and telling our feelings is disrespectful or make them the victim. It's draining
Shay seems to enjoy saying "yes ma'am" to Iyanla. She never had a mother she could look up to, only another sister who bickered with her. She actually looks relieved to have a maternal figure who is stable enough to receive her respect.
@@jujulushlife I agree w/ you. Unfortunately, this family is very damaged...possibly beyond repair w/ some of them. Unless they all went on to do individual AND group counseling, I dont know if they were able to hold it 2gether - I HOPE SO, but w/o professional intervention, I just dont see it. There's a LOT of deep-seeded things going on there...molestation by 1 prsn to BOTH the mother AND the daughter & the other daughter is HIS FRIEND; then the mom giving the 2 of her babies up to then go on to have MORE; then the mom and daughter being in a relationship w/ the same woman...WOW! JUST THOSE THINGS ALONE ARE ENOUGH! Imagine the other things they cldnt even get to. Sad. ~Peace✌🏽
😃same here, I had to make myself chamomile tea after watching them. I was worn out. I pray that they find their healing. I understand why Ms. IYanla needed to retire. It's hard work
@@sufundasamuels2313 she was very respectful the entire time she's such a beautiful person and her mom is too she's just beyond broken with 6 kids and no healing I get her too
I like the eldest child, there is something so authentic and profound about her.peace to them all and peace to all of us who are broken through family trauma.
I agree. The oldest is so strong. She had to sadly become the bigger person because her mom wouldnt and couldnt....DEEP! That had to happen for the healing to take place. Much respect to the oldest!
I’ll also add: “it is because of the LORD’s mercies that we are not CONSUMED (emphasis mine), because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning. Great is Thy faithfulness. The LORD is my portion sayeth my soul. Therefore will I hope in HIM. ” Lam 3:22-23🙌🙌
1 thing i admire about Shay is that she stayed respectful and open to healing throughout. Even at her angriest moments, she only directed her anger towards her mother, never at Iyanla or her other sisters. Wishing all these beautiful black women healing, love , peace and restoration in Jesus name.
Shay is the real Mother of this group. If Shay can heal, she can bring the rest along!! COME ON SHAY!!! You got this! They gonna have to go on without momma. She is simply not open to moving forward. Rooting for Shay❤️❤️
Facts because the mother seems to be very lost and narcissistic. I pray she(the mom) heals and gets it together. But with 6 daughter, she’s no longer the top priority.
it would be disrespectful for her to be anything other than what she really is . a daughter, a sister a friend. she can be a mother to her own children. there's no need for her to a surrogate to others, they have a mother and it's the same woman that is Shay's mother...yall are so presumptuous and disrespectful. you dont just assume a role over your actual mother. blk folks are so lost.
Yeah but as Iyanla said, their mom stopped growing at 7. She's also a little girl who longed for her mom and didn't learn how to be one. She keeps fighting back because she feels as though she always had to fight everyone. She never healed from her hurt and she is therefore blinded by pain.
I got upset when the mom was like, she burnt out, she need her weed. -_- DONT do that ma’am. No one threw it in your face that you were a crackhead. -_- just corny
That was her way of throwing the negative attention off of her and back onto her daughter... She was getting herself out of the "hot seat" by revealing something "bad and unknown" about Shay...petty and childish! The mother's actions/reactions when she felt like she was being "attacked" reveals that she truly is mentally stuck at the age of 7.
I loved that woman throughout this episode. From the way she looked you can tell she has been through it. Her and Precious looked broken. Sending blessings her way.
@@ashleyb.8217 so true. shes not ready to go there fully, and when a parent does that, they are prioritising their pain over the pain of their children. that's a difficult one to accept.
I really hope Iyanla has a therapist herself and is able to do something about all the stress she endures doing this as her job. It looks totally exhausting.
She said in an interview that she prays and cleanses constantly (smudges with sage etc) and there are people praying on set of the show and smudging - she’s truly mastered her inner self and I think she relies heavily on spirituality for what she doesn’t know. She always says she herself is not a therapist!
@@JamieBleu how old is that same woman honestly? I think she is a predator how on earth was she with two women from the same family? She is one messed up individual
I really can’t understand why the mother left her daughter with the family of her abuser. She must have known the situation she was leaving her in. I just can’t get over that
Maybe she thought the abuser wouldn't do it to her child, or maybe that was her only option at that point. It's still wrong but I'm trying to be understanding of her because she was in a truly awful position.
*ME TOO!!* That's what I said in my comment...wish they wld do a "Where are They Now?" on this family bcuz I'd REALLY ❤ to know how they're all doing today. ~Peace✌🏽
Can we talk about how trash the woman that dealt with both the daughter and mother is? What kind of trash-box messes with both mother and daughter? Disgusting.
Y’all peep in that sit down w shay the mom said ‘we were never in a relationship’ but when things started to heat up she throws ‘she bought me more stuff when we were together’, just to spite her daughter. I can’t with this ‘mother’, she can never tell the truth
I just hate how some man did all this damage to all these generations of women through predatory abuse and intergenerational trauma, and will never know or face accountability for his destruction. Hard to watch all that suffering.
@@Misssixty510 the show legal liability unfortunately. I hate to think he might well still be out there enjoying sunrise and sunset. How many more lives did that monster broke?
They didn’t let baby girl speak much, but when she did... babyyy that was powerful! 🤔 Also, in this 3rd part I noticed this is about the 4th thing that the Mother never told her daughters herself but miraculously assumes they knew...
That's why I was sooo glad when Iyanla said to Shay that it was as far as she cld go right now and that her mom was "taught to lie". She saw the pattern w/ the mom. That's what I LUV about Iyanla...she saw it too and wasn't letting it go UNSAID! ~Peace✌🏽
@@leonaroberts8648 How else would she have the being to be around those abusers and drugs and then work and maintain a job, heck even breath. Imagine what denial you got to be in to put your daughter around a molester.
Left her kids for crack at that! She wanted to keep her habits a secret from her kids but wants to tell the world her child needs weed to clear her mind. Lady have several seats and leave that girl alone. Hell I need a blunt after watching Alicia and all her antics!
The mom was gaslighting her and Shay was not having it. I feel for the daughter and I fully understand her attitude. She seems like she wants to move forward and I hope they can fix things.
Alicia is ridiculous. One min you don't wanna be a mother, the next she wants to throw her "respect me I'm your mother card". Chillllleee its hard to effectively communicate with somebody in so much damn denial. I feel for her daughters!
Remember where she is coming from. She was living in the dysfunction she was brought up in and passed on to her daughters, especially the oldest one. Hopefully, the lessons Iyanla taught them about being open in their communications will take root and they can grow from that weekend on, with further assistance from counseling.
Oh trust I get it shes ridiculous, broken, abused, hurt all that. However, she has 6 women that are in ruins, she brought into this world. It was time stop being so defensive, dismissive and try to hear them out no matter how bad it was. I feel bad for these young ladies. I truly hope Alicia is continuing the work to really mend those relationships!
You clearly wearn’t listening this is a chain of events and generations of brokeness and shes having to learn all these skills in one weekend give her a break even though she may not have wanted to be a mother she still is a mother just cause i dont wanna be a criminal dont change the fact I did the crime humble yourself take a step back and have some empathy or use a better word I feel for ALL OF THEM
@Cyconia Clark and not to mention she spoke out and her family knew and didnt do anything and she still had to be around the man what does that fo to someone’s head they normalize the trauma as if its just what is is and all its ever going to be
She’s (the mom) upset with her daughter but did the other woman know that was her daughter she was dating? The mom kicked the daughter out and remained friends with the one who actually betrayed them both🤦🏽♀️
Yes the other woman knew! Shay said she asked the woman what was going on with her mother and the woman said she didn't know what her mother was trippin off of. That woman was ratchet! Go back to around 23:38 of the video.
Exactly! That woman was more aware of what was going on than either of them. Can we really be surprised though? They were two broken, and dysfunctional women, so guess what kind of ppl they attract? ..
I think a big part of what Shay was still so angry about was that her mother chose the other woman over her! And was still in friendship/relationship with that woman - the cause of the breakdown of their mother-daughter relationship!
I feel the same way if you are referring to Precious her hurt was deep and from infantry okay Shay upset about the other woman, but Precious hurt come from abandonment and molestation by the same person that molested you that you gave me too knowing that family didn't protect you. I'm praying for them all but especially Precious.
The mama wrong for still dealing with the person that caused the drama... true the mother was hiding it... the daughter didn't know.... but that friend knew good & well what she was doing. She trifling for dating the mama and the daughter. That's nasty; rude, and disrespectful!!!
The mom and her daughters are just broken. They need restoration and only God can restore them from the spiritual side. I’m so happy Iyanla is there to push them to the point where they are aware of that fact. It’s a beautiful thing. Very beautiful women.
They all need long-term therapy. The mother does not want to own her stuff. Their mother may be too broken and they might have to love her from a distance.
Exactly what I was thinking. She assumes that they know her, but they don't know anything about her. I hope Marcia finds her voice amongst her sisters and they allow her. Their mother is toxic.
I totally agree. I think they all need to let Momma go and love her from a distance. Momma is too toxic to be in a relationship with these beautiful babies.
It takes two.... The mother sat and said, I was wrong and I'm sorry then threw shays weed smoking in her face immediately after. It's clear she isn't willing to change. These beautiful girls deserve more! The mother continues to befriend the woman who came between her and shay, that will continue to bother her if she stays. The mother doesn't care about them and will always do things to open old wounds.
She looks good for her age...she looks good for 6 kids...she looks good for having be a crack head...God has restored her and is restoring her...she just gotta go through the process
The mom looks as young as shay mom don’t look like she was on no drugs I think they may lie to make show look more dramatic they didn’t give no voice to Precious who was also raped by the grandad I assume and is greatly effected
"I forgive myself for believing I should have done better, when I didn't know how". WOW!! What a powerful affirmation. I'm gonna have to say that to myself in the mirror a few thousand times... Thank you Ms. Iyanla!!!
Shay is so pretty especially when she smiles I pray they stick together we need you out here in these streets Iyanla thank you for helping our sistas.🙏🏿✊🏿💖
It’s crazy how the mother wants to run away once they started talking about her. Come on. Your babies wish to heal with you and with each other. You can tell that the six ladies love each other. They just don’t know how to communicate.
It broke my heart that they dont know how to instinctively comfort each other in their traumas!! That was so hard to watch... I wanted to wrap my arms around each girl from 2 different positions- like I would if it was my sister or I was the mom seeing my daughter like that. I feel sorry for the mom but my heart hurts for the girls...
My heart hurts so much for Preccious. She really just wants to be loved. I pray that for every negative past experience she has been through, that she receives exponential kindness and love in return for the rest of her and her childrens days!!
It is not easy to tell ur kids u r a crackhead....she might have feared that the kids might do drugs bcos mama did drugs 😭😭😭 and they might not see a problem in doing that. The mother was irresponsible but she has been thru a lot!!! It's painful
That's how she was taught. I think that's the main issue pointed in this series is that dysfunctionality was taught from previous generation to the current one leading to their present/past situation.
It's amazing how people doubted her abilities in the beginning and maybe now but when you hear her story it's honestly miraculous and lets me know that she is here on a God given assignment. I receive every gem I can get from her.
I hate this show is ending. Our community struggles with talking about real issues. This show helps in so many ways. I really wish therapy wasn't taboo for our community.
WHEN SHAY APOLOGIZE TO HER MOM; & THEY HUGGED.. MY HEART JUST CRIED OUT IN HAPPINESS... 😪😢..I WISH ALL OF YOU LUCK, GOD BLESS& HE ALSO RESTORES😘... LUV U IYANLA
I've been crying from Part 1 - 3! The most important thing that I have learned from this healing process is to "Forgive myself & others" & for that, I thank God for every woman who represented me in this show.
I love that Iyanla does this because in OUR community we do tend to burry things because we are taught to be strong and tough , and its nice to see people who look like me/ us get healed like this and it encourages the rest us to finally have these uncomfortable conversations and heal. 👏🏾👏🏾 I have the upmost respect for the work she does..
For some reason, I love the way how Shay talks LOL. When she says the word “is”….she drags it out and say “iiiiiisssssssss” LOL. I’ve seen the episodes of this family and few years ago and theirs has been my favorite. I love that they all stuck together to resolve all of the conflict.
Alot of mothers and daughters act like sisters because the mother was abused, childhood stolen and she unknowingly teach her daughter not how to live but how to survive. Because some had them at an early age and feel as though I gotta live my life it don't matter how old your are, I'm doing me. Hurt ppl hurt ppl
I believe that we as Afro-AMericans in the United States have passed down fighting and just existing. We have struggled with racism and just trying to be accepted in this land and that takes a toll internally and in families. If my parents struggle just to find work and cant feed or care for their children - that takes a toll. AND especially when we think that sharing emotions is a sign of weakness. We cannot be weak in the U.S. when an enemy takes advantage of our weaknesses. But we owe it to ourselves and our posterity to pass down FORGIVENESS and heaing
"Weeping may endure for a nighttime, but joy comes in the morning. Dont give up 5 min before the miracle...because ANY moment could be THE moment that the healing falls..." Amen🙏🏽... I needed to hear that. Thx Mrs V!😌❤
The amount of healing that Iyanla teaches her viewers is astronomical. It gives me hope for this world to see someone capable of so much light and good. Thank you Iyanla, truly.
Mama don't allow herself to feel anything, she feels attacked because they're saying the things she actually feels about herself... It's so sad to see this... Breaks my heart 💔
I really hate that this came down to being about a lover. They have some deeeeeeep issues between them and they blow up about a lover. That's a cover up for avoiding what the issue really is
This family made me so emotional. The trauma and the gaslighting the mother does to invalidate what her daughter’s experiences of her are. I honestly think that all relationships aren’t meant to be saved. Unless the mother gets counseling, I do believe the sisters are better off on their healing journey without her.
If you express something to someone , and the first thing out their mouth is “are you done?” This is the distinction between listening and hearing, and what Iyanla coached Alicia on, just earlier the same episode, went through one ear and out the other. Alicia was listening to respond , not to receive what Shay was saying.
She wants these children to give her gratitude and she feels like they are dragging her name through the dirt . Last time I checked , the crack pipe and abandonment of her children did that!!!!
Mom keeps saying "they're lying!" My mom would probably say the same thing if I brought certain things to her attention. They aren't lying, mom just doesn't wanna face the truth
"FORGIVE YOURSELF FOR WANTING HER TO BE SOMEBODY THAT SHE IS NOT" These words are a GEM for those who have been through trauma. We want something that they may never be. Amen Iyanla. That speaks to a wide range of us.
This 3 part episode left me a wreck 😭😭 I cried so many times and thought about my family.. even reach out to my older sibling to apologize to her for our disconnect. Man iyanla is really special and I love how she’s able to get to the root of things 💗
Praying for peace and restoration for this family (relationship). I learn and get tools from watching this series. GOD BLESS THIS WOMAN AND HER GIFT (work).
The mother is a broken being. She was broken by the molestation in her childhood and she passed that on to her daughters. I pray for her and her daughters, only God can fix a broken soul 🙏
I understand her hurt. Most women have that hurt. The thing i can't wrap my brain around is how could she give her baby girl to the same predators. Knowing what is going to happen. Poor precious she looks so broken down.
This mother is extremely broken. Cold. Jaded. Liar. Out for self. She needs the mighty hand of God cause there is no amount of intervention that can fix somebody who doesn’t want to be fixed and at the basest of levels, doesn’t and can’t admit they are the core of the problem. Smh. I cringed the entire time watching all parts to this. Generational and ancestral curses running rampant. They need to call on Jesus.
That's because of love. They love her. My mum recently died and there was so much anger and bitterness in her heart towards her daughters. And we were angry as well but...we miss her. We miss her and its sad she's gone.
That’s their Mother. Fact is, if they can’t resolve their issues with/about their Mom p, they’re going to take that trauma into every other relationship they have. Friendships, romantic relationships, their relationship with Self, the relationship with their children etc.
That "mother" doesnt deserve their love. She's a taker...not a giver. She abandonded her kids, but wants to be praised & "appreciated." She's toxic af & needs to be grey rocked. She'll never be what those women need her to be.
Daughter was bringing it to Mom in too real a way...and I saw sometimes we gotta know that there is a limitation in place.. mom is broken ...can only be where she at. .she can only be in so much truth at a time....baby steps. This is encouraging to watch..Yes We ... our families Can move on in our healing.! Thank you Iyanla!
Why parents always think children GROWN CHILDREN trying to have a proper conversation and telling our feelings is disrespectful or make them the victim. It's draining
Because too many of us were raised not to question adults
@@shelocsher2396 🎯
@@shelocsher2396 so true
I think a lot of it comes from a place of guilt.
Not being able to communicate respectfully is the problem and low education. It’s not what you say it’s how you say it.
“YOU LIED! YOU TAUGHT EM HOW TO LIE!”
That hit my soul DAMN😫
Right!? Don't blame someone for doing what you taught them to do!.
Yes, that was a very intense moment and it was very profound.
I wanted to rewind it, and record it, and go over my mom’s house and connect my phone to her surround bluetooth speaker and play it on a loop 100x lol
Parents fail to realize we do what they do
NGGA I JUMPED N YELPED
Iyanla is a straight up spiritual gangsta and the coldblooded truth...she is a warrior
I model my whole attitude from her ways. She taught me how to communicate with myself and family and we're doing better! Love this woman!♥️
@@nobodyspecial1733 @gokarengo ❤️🙏🏾
Yess👑👑👑
Facts!
I like how you put that!
Shay seems to enjoy saying "yes ma'am" to Iyanla. She never had a mother she could look up to, only another sister who bickered with her. She actually looks relieved to have a maternal figure who is stable enough to receive her respect.
I caught that too💕 ... I’m happy for Shay to experience that
Indeed
Noticed that too
Bless her heart. Bless her heart ❤❤❤
I noticed that as well
"Don't give up five minutes before the miracle!" Whew, I felt that!
Amen
Chills
Amen!! Deep!! 🙌🙌💜💞💫
I just love when Iyanla says that's, oh my God, it's so powerful. 🙏🏼🙏🏼💪🏼💪🏼
Iyanla really fought for them. She was practically begging the mom to stay cuz she knew it would cause nearly permanent damage
There is already permanent damage but now things can be better moving on
@@jujulushlife I agree w/ you. Unfortunately, this family is very damaged...possibly beyond repair w/ some of them. Unless they all went on to do individual AND group counseling, I dont know if they were able to hold it 2gether - I HOPE SO, but w/o professional intervention, I just dont see it. There's a LOT of deep-seeded things going on there...molestation by 1 prsn to BOTH the mother AND the daughter & the other daughter is HIS FRIEND; then the mom giving the 2 of her babies up to then go on to have MORE; then the mom and daughter being in a relationship w/ the same woman...WOW! JUST THOSE THINGS ALONE ARE ENOUGH! Imagine the other things they cldnt even get to. Sad. ~Peace✌🏽
I'm not surprised Iyanla is done with it. I'm exhausted just watching.
@@jujulushlife true
The mother can’t get past her own self, she has 5 children who need her. Be the parent, there is so much going on here.
This family stressed me out. When Iylana said breathe. I took a deep breath
lol same here, they took me through it
😃same here, I had to make myself chamomile tea after watching them. I was worn out. I pray that they find their healing. I understand why Ms. IYanla needed to retire. It's hard work
Hahaha I kept breathing every time she said it 😂😂
Am equally stressed
Me too
When Iyanla says: take a breath, I automatically take a breath
🤣
Me too..
Me too!
🤣
Me tooo
Shay saying yes ma'am even when she's angry 😭🥺 so sweet.
I love her for that!
Shay wants a mother figure so badly. That ‘yes ma’am’ comes from a such a little girl place 😥
Yes, you can tell she's back there again and at least she has respect for Ms. Iyanla even in such a horrible situation.
@@sufundasamuels2313 she was very respectful the entire time she's such a beautiful person and her mom is too she's just beyond broken with 6 kids and no healing I get her too
I'm assuming the woman her and her mother both dated was probably an older woman too, for this reason
I like the eldest child, there is something so authentic and profound about her.peace to them all and peace to all of us who are broken through family trauma.
Same to you girl! Many of us needed to hear that ❤ Thank you! ~Peace✌🏽
I agree. The oldest is so strong. She had to sadly become the bigger person because her mom wouldnt and couldnt....DEEP! That had to happen for the healing to take place. Much respect to the oldest!
Beautifully stated. I share your sentiment, @Elle Southernbelle👌🏾🙏🏾
@@CANDYSOULonline ABSOLUTELY!! 👌🏾👌🏾🎤
Momma is definitely jealous of her !!! She is the WOMAN she wishes she was and can be!!!!! I love that daughter!!!
"Weeping may endure for a nighttime, but joy cometh in the morning." Amen!
Glory
That was powerful
AMEN 🙏🏾
I’ll also add: “it is because of the LORD’s mercies that we are not CONSUMED (emphasis mine), because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning. Great is Thy faithfulness. The LORD is my portion sayeth my soul. Therefore will I hope in HIM. ” Lam 3:22-23🙌🙌
@@Future-zx9ts I love the book of lamentations
1 thing i admire about Shay is that she stayed respectful and open to healing throughout. Even at her angriest moments, she only directed her anger towards her mother, never at Iyanla or her other sisters. Wishing all these beautiful black women healing, love , peace and restoration in Jesus name.
But she did, the sister everyone forget about. Sister number 5
Amen
She got angry with her sister
She did get angry at Marcia, but I think they made up in pt.2
Ppppp09
Shay is the real Mother of this group.
If Shay can heal, she can bring the rest along!!
COME ON SHAY!!! You got this!
They gonna have to go on without momma. She is simply not open to moving forward.
Rooting for Shay❤️❤️
Facts because the mother seems to be very lost and narcissistic. I pray she(the mom) heals and gets it together. But with 6 daughter, she’s no longer the top priority.
it would be disrespectful for her to be anything other than what she really is . a daughter, a sister a friend. she can be a mother to her own children. there's no need for her to a surrogate to others, they have a mother and it's the same woman that is Shay's mother...yall are so presumptuous and disrespectful. you dont just assume a role over your actual mother. blk folks are so lost.
The youngest daughter hugging on to her mom on the stairs and the mom not acknowledging it because of her issues is what's wrong with this family
Totally agree
Yeah but as Iyanla said, their mom stopped growing at 7. She's also a little girl who longed for her mom and didn't learn how to be one. She keeps fighting back because she feels as though she always had to fight everyone. She never healed from her hurt and she is therefore blinded by pain.
Everything is wrong thats y they are here
I got upset when the mom was like, she burnt out, she need her weed. -_- DONT do that ma’am. No one threw it in your face that you were a crackhead. -_- just corny
🤣
Facts Sis💯
True.
That was her way of throwing the negative attention off of her and back onto her daughter... She was getting herself out of the "hot seat" by revealing something "bad and unknown" about Shay...petty and childish! The mother's actions/reactions when she felt like she was being "attacked" reveals that she truly is mentally stuck at the age of 7.
Thats the only ammunition she had
I love how Shay says “yes mam.” ❤️👏🏽
I noticed that she has more respect for Iyanla than she had for her own mom.
@@hopelsumner Right!!
OMG Me too! I love it all XOXO
Me too
I loved that woman throughout this episode. From the way she looked you can tell she has been through it. Her and Precious looked broken. Sending blessings her way.
I'm sorry, but the mom is to much for me. The narcissism, playing the victim, refusing to grow up, so SELFISH.
Facts
I feel as if the mommy is just putting all her energy into suppressing her pain. She has no energy for their pain.
I really wanna like this comment 2million times .... like I would’ve lost it
@@ashleyb.8217 so true. shes not ready to go there fully, and when a parent does that, they are prioritising their pain over the pain of their children. that's a difficult one to accept.
@@yasminwalker4966 fully agree with you!
Now if Shay had said “she need her pipe” she would’ve been wrong
I agree
Wronger than 2 left shoes
This tickled me.
@@glocktaviousbrown5420 lol
And I would of died!!!!!! 😂
I really hope Iyanla has a therapist herself and is able to do something about all the stress she endures doing this as her job. It looks totally exhausting.
@Narly waves Seriously? What are you trying to achieve? You don't know a single thing about me, you can't make a definite statement like that.
Sounds funny but very true and that is very thoughtful of u.God bless you...
She said in an interview that she prays and cleanses constantly (smudges with sage etc) and there are people praying on set of the show and smudging - she’s truly mastered her inner self and I think she relies heavily on spirituality for what she doesn’t know. She always says she herself is not a therapist!
Soo true!!!! She endures soo much with these folks
Of course, Ms. Iyanla have to be debriefed before taking on all of these issues.
Now i understand what Shay meant when she said the momma was jealous.
And competing with her...🤔
I didn’t catch how she was jealous! Was it the dating the same woman?
right. I couldnt wait for an example
@@PrudentWifeTV yep dating the exact same woman.
@@JamieBleu how old is that same woman honestly? I think she is a predator how on earth was she with two women from the same family? She is one messed up individual
I really can’t understand why the mother left her daughter with the family of her abuser. She must have known the situation she was leaving her in. I just can’t get over that
Maybe she thought the abuser wouldn't do it to her child, or maybe that was her only option at that point. It's still wrong but I'm trying to be understanding of her because she was in a truly awful position.
Right bc the mother never answered the question as to why she left her there.
Right and for her to know her daughter was molested but to say she didn't know it was them is a lie. She's a different kinda person
@@Daqueenb87220 exactly because if I find out my child has been molested the first thing imma ask is “who did it”
He may have forced it and controlled it.
This episode was deep. I would like a update on these women.
*ME TOO!!* That's what I said in my comment...wish they wld do a "Where are They Now?" on this family bcuz I'd REALLY ❤ to know how they're all doing today. ~Peace✌🏽
I was just about to ask the same thing but seen your comment. I hope this family have healed❤❤❤
I was hoping when they uploaded this ep it would have an update! Siigh
A family member commented on part 1 that things just got worse after the filming stopped 😢
@@joannasaadati8810 omg wow! Sending love and light for this family
Can we talk about how trash the woman that dealt with both the daughter and mother is? What kind of trash-box messes with both mother and daughter? Disgusting.
Was it a female who did the molestation?
@@tatucorreia No they kept referring to him.
@@tatucorreia I think Alexandra is referring to thr lesbian lover the mother and daughter dated
@@thulinkabane5765 oh.ok.
So what? They all can date whoever they like. Get over it and worry about your new relationship.
Y’all peep in that sit down w shay the mom said ‘we were never in a relationship’ but when things started to heat up she throws ‘she bought me more stuff when we were together’, just to spite her daughter. I can’t with this ‘mother’, she can never tell the truth
Wow so Shay was right about the competition
Exactly they comparing what the lady bought each other
I just hate how some man did all this damage to all these generations of women through predatory abuse and intergenerational trauma, and will never know or face accountability for his destruction. Hard to watch all that suffering.
I fully agree!
Yes - I hate the fact that they blocked/bleeped out his name.
The man is supposed to be the head and when the head is out of order, everything else will as well.
I was looking for this comment. These predators getting more protection than children🤬
@@Misssixty510 the show legal liability unfortunately.
I hate to think he might well still be out there enjoying sunrise and sunset. How many more lives did that monster broke?
They didn’t let baby girl speak much, but when she did... babyyy that was powerful!
🤔 Also, in this 3rd part I noticed this is about the 4th thing that the Mother never told her daughters herself but miraculously assumes they knew...
That's why I was sooo glad when Iyanla said to Shay that it was as far as she cld go right now and that her mom was "taught to lie". She saw the pattern w/ the mom. That's what I LUV about Iyanla...she saw it too and wasn't letting it go UNSAID! ~Peace✌🏽
Wow
I hate it Mom's nonchalant attitude like she did no wrong and she owed her daughters no explanation.
Denial is a strong drug/coping mechanism.
@@leonaroberts8648 How else would she have the being to be around those abusers and drugs and then work and maintain a job, heck even breath. Imagine what denial you got to be in to put your daughter around a molester.
I understand Shay completely! And how her mom going to come at her about weed when she abandoned all her children for drugs🤔
Left her kids for crack at that! She wanted to keep her habits a secret from her kids but wants to tell the world her child needs weed to clear her mind. Lady have several seats and leave that girl alone. Hell I need a blunt after watching Alicia and all her antics!
The mom is speaking from experience and doesn't want the same negative recourse for her daughter.
That’s some deep pain. Wounded Mothers cause so much damage.
🎯🎯🎯
@@nreynolds75243 Nah, that was PURE ANGER imo...had nothing to do w/ any "lesson". She wanted her to try & embarrass her, publicly. ~Peace✌🏽
Shay sound so sweet only when she say "yes maam' 🤣😂😂
Like a 7 yr old... ☺☺☺ sweet as she wanna be!
Like a lil baby!!! 😂😂
The mom was gaslighting her and Shay was not having it. I feel for the daughter and I fully understand her attitude. She seems like she wants to move forward and I hope they can fix things.
Alicia is ridiculous. One min you don't wanna be a mother, the next she wants to throw her "respect me I'm your mother card". Chillllleee its hard to effectively communicate with somebody in so much damn denial. I feel for her daughters!
Remember where she is coming from. She was living in the dysfunction she was brought up in and passed on to her daughters, especially the oldest one. Hopefully, the lessons Iyanla taught them about being open in their communications will take root and they can grow from that weekend on, with further assistance from counseling.
Ridiculous or broken?
Oh trust I get it shes ridiculous, broken, abused, hurt all that. However, she has 6 women that are in ruins, she brought into this world. It was time stop being so defensive, dismissive and try to hear them out no matter how bad it was. I feel bad for these young ladies. I truly hope Alicia is continuing the work to really mend those relationships!
You clearly wearn’t listening this is a chain of events and generations of brokeness and shes having to learn all these skills in one weekend give her a break even though she may not have wanted to be a mother she still is a mother just cause i dont wanna be a criminal dont change the fact I did the crime humble yourself take a step back and have some empathy or use a better word I feel for ALL OF THEM
@Cyconia Clark and not to mention she spoke out and her family knew and didnt do anything and she still had to be around the man what does that fo to someone’s head they normalize the trauma as if its just what is is and all its ever going to be
She’s (the mom) upset with her daughter but did the other woman know that was her daughter she was dating? The mom kicked the daughter out and remained friends with the one who actually betrayed them both🤦🏽♀️
Yes the other woman knew! Shay said she asked the woman what was going on with her mother and the woman said she didn't know what her mother was trippin off of. That woman was ratchet! Go back to around 23:38 of the video.
Exactly! That woman was more aware of what was going on than either of them. Can we really be surprised though? They were two broken, and dysfunctional women, so guess what kind of ppl they attract? ..
I think a big part of what Shay was still so angry about was that her mother chose the other woman over her! And was still in friendship/relationship with that woman - the cause of the breakdown of their mother-daughter relationship!
@@deborahpinkey1264 yup it’s sad. I pray that they all continue to heal and improve their relationships.
@@kali_love888 Me, too.
I don’t feel like they spent enough time on baby girl #3.. but I hope she gets counseling going forward
Maybe they did but perhaps it was a bit more boring.. maybe they had to cut the footage.. I hope!!! They each needed personal attention.
@@vanessastarr8809 most definitely! They all need real help - baby girls spirit just seems so broken 😞
I feel the same way if you are referring to Precious her hurt was deep and from infantry okay Shay upset about the other woman, but Precious hurt come from abandonment and molestation by the same person that molested you that you gave me too knowing that family didn't protect you. I'm praying for them all but especially Precious.
@@karenfairman1046 I wholeheartedly agree
I agree. They didn't touch on the fourth daughter either, she was silent for most of the episodes. These women need a lot of healing.
This job is harder than a heart surgery LoL
so very true....one needs lots of energy and patience and most of all empathy! congratulations to Iyanla
Soul surgery 😇
Both☕
The mama wrong for still dealing with the person that caused the drama... true the mother was hiding it... the daughter didn't know.... but that friend knew good & well what she was doing.
She trifling for dating the mama and the daughter. That's nasty; rude, and disrespectful!!!
Amen.
So what. It's not worth all this chaos. Shay is nuts.
Exactly! But the Mom lying so much through the whole process, it's hard to believe anything she said.
@@BethJehovah She acts just like her mom though cause her mom attitude cold & stank..
Yep
The mom and her daughters are just broken. They need restoration and only God can restore them from the spiritual side. I’m so happy Iyanla is there to push them to the point where they are aware of that fact. It’s a beautiful thing. Very beautiful women.
Momma doesn't want to admit that she is responsible for the dysfunction.
@@plpblack The one with the braids... I peeped that.
@@donnawoodford6641 - So very true!!
I really hope that know that God can heal them every where they hurt right now
@@chitaylor2775 no the one with short hair
Iyanla: " breath, breath,..... y'all are not breathing!!!" 🤣🤣😅
😆
😂😂😂 wasn’t breathing at all!
They all need long-term therapy. The mother does not want to own her stuff. Their mother may be too broken and they might have to love her from a distance.
Exactly what I was thinking. She assumes that they know her, but they don't know anything about her. I hope Marcia finds her voice amongst her sisters and they allow her. Their mother is toxic.
They can love her from afar.
I totally agree. I think they all need to let Momma go and love her from a distance. Momma is too toxic to be in a relationship with these beautiful babies.
sometimes loving from afar is the best you can do.
It takes two.... The mother sat and said, I was wrong and I'm sorry then threw shays weed smoking in her face immediately after. It's clear she isn't willing to change. These beautiful girls deserve more! The mother continues to befriend the woman who came between her and shay, that will continue to bother her if she stays. The mother doesn't care about them and will always do things to open old wounds.
The mom looks good for 6 kids.
She looks good for her age...she looks good for 6 kids...she looks good for having be a crack head...God has restored her and is restoring her...she just gotta go through the process
Really good.
Well that’s what happens when you don’t let life stress you out. 🤷🏾♀️
@@jessicathompson111 😂😂😂
The mom looks as young as shay mom don’t look like she was on no drugs I think they may lie to make show look more dramatic they didn’t give no voice to Precious who was also raped by the grandad I assume and is greatly effected
"I forgive myself for believing I should have done better, when I didn't know how". WOW!! What a powerful affirmation. I'm gonna have to say that to myself in the mirror a few thousand times... Thank you Ms. Iyanla!!!
Shay is so pretty especially when she smiles I pray they stick together we need you out here in these streets Iyanla thank you for helping our sistas.🙏🏿✊🏿💖
agree
It’s crazy how the mother wants to run away once they started talking about her. Come on. Your babies wish to heal with you and with each other. You can tell that the six ladies love each other. They just don’t know how to communicate.
It broke my heart that they dont know how to instinctively comfort each other in their traumas!! That was so hard to watch... I wanted to wrap my arms around each girl from 2 different positions- like I would if it was my sister or I was the mom seeing my daughter like that. I feel sorry for the mom but my heart hurts for the girls...
Shays hair is so bomb omg I wish. Okay thats random!
Shay gives me natural beauty vibes love her hair as well.
It’s her skin for me 😂❤️
@@insidejesshead3545 Absolutely.
Yesss her & the other natural sister🥰 I keep looking like wish my hair could do that!
@@insidejesshead3545 she is beautiful
This woman doesn't even know how to be a mother. Her love for her daughters is far from unconditional. Its sad.
“She was my girl first” coming from a mother is wild..
My draw dropped. Just shameless.
Right!! That statement brought on a whole new level of toxicity!!!
Go head Iyanla!! That moment when she recited "weeping may come...." ‼‼‼ sent chills!! "Dont GIVE UP five minutes before the miracle!!
I got tears in my eyes when she said that
My prayers go to the family. Iyanla is such a kind hearted and experienced person. Love her
Love her so much
@@rarejourneys zź☆☆☆☆
Mz. Iyanla is my shero!! I 🖤 her💯.
I feel like every time an episode comes on some of my life is on it and I get diagnosed she’s that dam good .
Shay and her mom are beautiful. Im sad for all of their pain.
I said the same thing. They are all beautiful woman. Im so happy their mother got off crack. She doesn't look like what they have gone through.
They look good for their age.
They all beautiful
My heart hurts so much for Preccious. She really just wants to be loved. I pray that for every negative past experience she has been through, that she receives exponential kindness and love in return for the rest of her and her childrens days!!
This mom does things and doesnt tell her children but somehow she expects all her children to know?!!!🤔🤨🤦♀️
Why is it their business to know mom's private life?
She was lying the whole time. Just sad.
It is not easy to tell ur kids u r a crackhead....she might have feared that the kids might do drugs bcos mama did drugs 😭😭😭 and they might not see a problem in doing that. The mother was irresponsible but she has been thru a lot!!! It's painful
@@BethJehovah so they can forgive the mother for being a shtty mom and move on. That's why.
That's how she was taught. I think that's the main issue pointed in this series is that dysfunctionality was taught from previous generation to the current one leading to their present/past situation.
the Mom & the first born Daughter are just ALIKE!!!!! why they bump heads they cant even see it!
They are twins! Only the daughter is much more in touch with the pain of it all....smh...God help us all!
@@pennynocry9174 yes!!
I agree. It's just the mom be lying lol
I love Iyanla you can feel the sincerity of her passion to help others. There’s nothing fake about her calling.
so true
It's amazing how people doubted her abilities in the beginning and maybe now but when you hear her story it's honestly miraculous and lets me know that she is here on a God given assignment. I receive every gem I can get from her.
Yes
For real 😊
So true ❤
Really enjoyed this 3 part series... i need a "Where are they now?" asap, i hope this family heals
Me too!
Ikr..hope she do a update b4 she her show end 4good...
Yes!!
Yes I loved the whole show , Thank you Iyanla for showing us real families who have suffered ❤️🙏🏼😢😢
@@robinjohnson1141 yeah I love 💕 real stories like this 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼Thank you Iyanla
I hate this show is ending. Our community struggles with talking about real issues. This show helps in so many ways. I really wish therapy wasn't taboo for our community.
this lady has no idea how blessed she is to have all these beautiful children some women would kill to have a big family like this.
WHEN SHAY APOLOGIZE TO HER MOM; & THEY HUGGED.. MY HEART JUST CRIED OUT IN HAPPINESS... 😪😢..I WISH ALL OF YOU LUCK, GOD BLESS& HE ALSO RESTORES😘... LUV U IYANLA
I've been crying from Part 1 - 3! The most important thing that I have learned from this healing process is to "Forgive myself & others" & for that, I thank God for every woman who represented me in this show.
Same.
I love that Iyanla does this because in OUR community we do tend to burry things because we are taught to be strong and tough , and its nice to see people who look like me/ us get healed like this and it encourages the rest us to finally have these uncomfortable conversations and heal. 👏🏾👏🏾 I have the upmost respect for the work she does..
Let me give Mrs Iyana her flowers 🌸
She is doing Gods work
For some reason, I love the way how Shay talks LOL. When she says the word “is”….she drags it out and say “iiiiiisssssssss” LOL. I’ve seen the episodes of this family and few years ago and theirs has been my favorite. I love that they all stuck together to resolve all of the conflict.
Maybe that's where I've seen them because they look so familiar!
They gotta be from the DMV area lol
Alot of mothers and daughters act like sisters because the mother was abused, childhood stolen and she unknowingly teach her daughter not how to live but how to survive. Because some had them at an early age and feel as though I gotta live my life it don't matter how old your are, I'm doing me. Hurt ppl hurt ppl
Exactly!
Perfectly said.
Well spoken Queen
Exactly! They’ve only 15 years apart.
I believe that we as Afro-AMericans in the United States have passed down fighting and just existing. We have struggled with racism and just trying to be accepted in this land and that takes a toll internally and in families. If my parents struggle just to find work and cant feed or care for their children - that takes a toll. AND especially when we think that sharing emotions is a sign of weakness. We cannot be weak in the U.S. when an enemy takes advantage of our weaknesses. But we owe it to ourselves and our posterity to pass down FORGIVENESS and heaing
Props to Mom for not leaving, and having the difficult conversations.
You can’t be serious 😂 she literally did the bare minimum
"Weeping may endure for a nighttime, but joy comes in the morning. Dont give up 5 min before the miracle...because ANY moment could be THE moment that the healing falls..." Amen🙏🏽... I needed to hear that. Thx Mrs V!😌❤
The amount of healing that Iyanla teaches her viewers is astronomical. It gives me hope for this world to see someone capable of so much light and good. Thank you Iyanla, truly.
It was the “I CAN’T LEAVE YALL ALONE FOR FIVE MINUTES” and then them saying “no we’re talking” so they wouldn’t get in trouble for fighting 😂
I pray that this family is still in a good place. Beautiful Black Women
I am proud of the oldest daughter, for trying and doing better, even though it’s her mother’s fault.
@deestefmorr agree
Such beautiful women with so much pain. I commend them on trying to work through the trauma. That’s a huge step! ❤️
This lady was 50 .... a recovered addict with 6 children... wow
I hope she realizes how blessed she truly is. She doesn't look at all like what she's been through.
@@a.christian9647 true
Yes she is a beautiful woman.
she so beautfiful
Pretty as ever look so young
Shay is actually a sweetheart my heart breaks for her and precious
This was so damn heavy to watch..
Healing is powerful and forgiveness is divine!
Iyanla's been a great vessel.
Mama don't allow herself to feel anything, she feels attacked because they're saying the things she actually feels about herself... It's so sad to see this... Breaks my heart 💔
I love how the youngest articulated her observations.
I really hate that this came down to being about a lover. They have some deeeeeeep issues between them and they blow up about a lover. That's a cover up for avoiding what the issue really is
Black trauma moms ALWAYS run when confronted with the trauma. Iyanla is right. You got to sit in that truth and the trauma you passed on to heal
This one was the most chilling disturbing session with Iyanla I’ve ever seen. The hurt is unbelievable.
When Ms. Iyanla gave her those flowers I lost it. 😭😭😭😭😭😭
This family made me so emotional. The trauma and the gaslighting the mother does to invalidate what her daughter’s experiences of her are. I honestly think that all relationships aren’t meant to be saved. Unless the mother gets counseling, I do believe the sisters are better off on their healing journey without her.
Yesss!!!
When the daughter Keisha poured out her heart to her mom on the stairs broke me💔I really hope this family can heal and grow.🙏🏾
This was so heavy. I want a "Where are they now?" episode with this family. I pray they are all in a better place individually and collectively !
Iyanla deserves a noble peace prize. What a woman. Thank you God for creating her❤️❤️
Iyanla is literally the GOAT . Very dedicated and passionate for what she does
I am here for it Part 3 Iyanla is at it again dropping gems to learn from
These are old btw
Put the family issues aside for minute.. Have you noticed how pretty these women are? ❤️
If you express something to someone , and the first thing out their mouth is “are you done?” This is the distinction between listening and hearing, and what Iyanla coached Alicia on, just earlier the same episode, went through one ear and out the other. Alicia was listening to respond , not to receive what Shay was saying.
She wants these children to give her gratitude and she feels like they are dragging her name through the dirt . Last time I checked , the crack pipe and abandonment of her children did that!!!!
Mom keeps saying "they're lying!" My mom would probably say the same thing if I brought certain things to her attention. They aren't lying, mom just doesn't wanna face the truth
I salute you Alicia.. “I forgive myself for believing I should have done better when I didn’t know how”
"FORGIVE YOURSELF FOR WANTING HER TO BE SOMEBODY THAT SHE IS NOT" These words are a GEM for those who have been through trauma. We want something that they may never be. Amen Iyanla. That speaks to a wide range of us.
This 3 part episode left me a wreck 😭😭 I cried so many times and thought about my family.. even reach out to my older sibling to apologize to her for our disconnect.
Man iyanla is really special and I love how she’s able to get to the root of things 💗
Almost brought me to tears. How heartbreaking to have a family unit like that
Praying for peace and restoration for this family (relationship). I learn and get tools from watching this series. GOD BLESS THIS WOMAN AND HER GIFT (work).
The mother is a broken being. She was broken by the molestation in her childhood and she passed that on to her daughters.
I pray for her and her daughters, only God can fix a broken soul 🙏
I understand her hurt. Most women have that hurt. The thing i can't wrap my brain around is how could she give her baby girl to the same predators. Knowing what is going to happen. Poor precious she looks so broken down.
This mother is extremely broken. Cold. Jaded. Liar. Out for self. She needs the mighty hand of God cause there is no amount of intervention that can fix somebody who doesn’t want to be fixed and at the basest of levels, doesn’t and can’t admit they are the core of the problem. Smh. I cringed the entire time watching all parts to this. Generational and ancestral curses running rampant. They need to call on Jesus.
Those words "don't give up five minutes before the miracle"
This is exactly how my mom is very narcissistic. Can’t disagree with her about anything without an argument . Or thinking you’re challenging her .
It breaks my heart how they are still running behind their mother . Even after all that she has done
That's because of love. They love her. My mum recently died and there was so much anger and bitterness in her heart towards her daughters. And we were angry as well but...we miss her. We miss her and its sad she's gone.
That’s their Mother. Fact is, if they can’t resolve their issues with/about their Mom p, they’re going to take that trauma into every other relationship they have. Friendships, romantic relationships, their relationship with Self, the relationship with their children etc.
Cuz of LOVE .....and their mother
Love covers a multitude of sin.
That "mother" doesnt deserve their love. She's a taker...not a giver. She abandonded her kids, but wants to be praised & "appreciated."
She's toxic af & needs to be grey rocked. She'll never be what those women need her to be.
this is a sad sad story. watching this show makes me so grateful for my own level of family disfunction.
What? Dysfunction is dysfunction
Daughter was bringing it to Mom in too real a way...and I saw sometimes we gotta know that there is a limitation in place.. mom is broken ...can only be where she at. .she can only be in so much truth at a time....baby steps. This is encouraging to watch..Yes We ... our families Can move on in our healing.! Thank you Iyanla!
“I didnt feel the need to tell them” is truly this womans slogan
Not a Cr*ckhead telling me I need some green 🙃 Sis lets not attack our vices 😂
Fr tho😂😂😂
Iyanla is really annointed to do what she does... She has all that it takes to walk on this path