Becoming a Social Spy: Observational Learning | Caroline Maguire | TEDxQueensVillage
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ส.ค. 2024
- How to read people using observational learning. Caroline Maguire, M. Ed., is the founder of a revolutionary Social Emotional Learning methodology that breaks down the complexity of human connection into easy, actionable steps. A seasoned social skills coach and author, Ms. Maguire is a leading expert on what it takes to move from loneliness to chit chat to creating lasting relationships. She holds a Master’s in Education with a concentration in SEL training and is the author of Why Will No One Play with Me?, the winner of 3 awards including the Best Parenting and Family Book 2020 as awarded by American Book Fest. After several years as a highly respected social skills clinician at the Hallowell Center, Ms. Maguire formed her own private practice and founded ADHD Coach Academy’s training curriculum, The Fundamentals of ADHD Coaching for Families. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
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So excited for this!! Caroline’s work is AMAZING and she cares so much about helping people connect in a time where we really need it 💕 I think a lot of us are struggling to social lately
I think we all are struggling socially since the pandemic and some of us our entire lives! We all need connection. Thank you so much for watching! Caroline
Thanks for introducing me to Caroline! She has very interesting perspective.
I wonder if there’s a correlation with “spies” and Autism. I find a lot of what is described as a “spy” to be very close to describing my own masking techniques.
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This is a valuable tool for teachers as well as parents and friends. So much... so many people are misjudged, dismissed, mistreated or ignored when we do not have the skills to observe, remember and reach out. Thank you for posting.
Oh my gosh so true. I am so glad you see this as a tool for those misjudged and dismissed !! It is!!
Caroline is on the cutting edge of social connection and emotional competence. Her book, “Why Will No one Play With Me” is considered the Bible
for parents teaching, and modeling for their children essential life skills that enable them to excel academically and flourish in their relationships. I social spy! And I practice what Caroline has taught me every day. Thank you for your courageous leadership Caroline in the field of ADHD and connection!
Thank you so much! Tell me what did you learn that helped us all connect? Choosing Love- Caroline
This is such an important issue for today! As a mom of kids who struggle socially, teaching them to become a Social Spy has really helped them to develop self awareness and build the skills they were missing. Her book “Why Will No One Play With Me” is an excellent resource for parents who want to coach their kids to success in the area of social emotional learning. Thank you Caroline for your leadership in this field and for the work you are doing for families and children.
Thank you so much for such a lovely comment. Tell me what else you need? As a mom what else could help you? So honored to be here for such unique and talented kids and adults.
As a therapist and a mother of an AHDH kid, I find Caroline’s presentation very helpful and relatable.
Thank you so much!! I am so glad.
Some people are born with social skills. I'm not one of them. Most social situations are stressful and exhausting. Sure, it's tough for kids. But why doesn't it get any easier now that we're adults? Caroline gets the importance of social skills throughout our lives, and she's committed to helping all of us connect. Feeling lonely, withdrawing and playing small aren't your only options (at least, not if you learn what Caroline has to share!) Can't wait for the next book, Caroline!
Thank you so much!! Its not easier as adults !! Its harder. I am so glad this resonated with you.
Caroline’s masterful storytelling, “Becoming a Social Spy,” highlights the need to develop awareness and observation skills in our interactions with others. Weaving in evocative anecdotes and research findings, Caroline’s masterful Ted X is a gem to listen to and watch. Her work has powerful ramifications for social connection, an integral aspect of health and wellbeing, and advancing the field of social-emotional learning.
Thank you so much - I am so glad the link between spy and developing awareness!!
Caroline, this is fantastic, engaging and well worth the sixteen minutes. You are a Godsend to every person who is not born with social skills which it turn out is a lot of us. Who knew that they can actually be learned? Imagine the pain and suffering we could avert if every child (and all adults) were given this training. Bravo to you Caroline.
Oh my gosh thank you so much !! My goal is exactly that to avert all that pain and give people answers. Thank you for watching.
Such an important lecture. Being a social spy is a skill that makes a such a difference in social and professional settings alike. Taking the time to be a social spy and relate to people on their level is vital to being successful in any relationship. Thank you Caroline!
That is so true! I am so glad you are taking away so much for the workplace. Thank you for watching!
Caroline has such a passion for the work she does. I can see using social spy as a strategy to help when I’m in a group setting because as I am self-aware and read the room, I can better engage in meaningful conversation with someone. This is doable and practical. Great talk!
Thank you so much! I am so glad spy has helped you and that its very doable!
Such an important and complex topic explained so effortlessly. This is not just for ADHDers…we can all get better at being social spies and improve our social skills and as a result deepen our empathy! Much needed in such a polarised world.
Oh my gosh so true for everyone! How we understand people leads to more empathy! Such a good point!! Caroline
I am in! I’m becoming a social spy. I want greater connection and authentic compassion. Thank you Caroline Maguire for this blueprint to social joy!
I love that -- I never thought about this as a blueprint for social joy! But it is.
So great to see you up there talking about this! As always, you share such great insight with meaningful takeaways. Thank you for helping others to better navigate the world around them when it comes to understanding/interpreting gestures, conversations, and assessing reactions.
You are so welcome. Gestures are so key to understanding others. I am so glad this was such a powerful takeaway!
Caroline’s work is so important in teaching how to overcome social anxiety with simple techniques to observe, engage, and make social connections! Thank you for all your importent work in this field
I am so glad the technique felt simple- that is the goal.
Outstanding work from Caroline! We all need to get better at our social awareness. She’s leading the charge on social skills!
Thank you so much Brendan- I try!! And I appreciate your help with that charge!!
Amazing and important work!!! Caroline breaks social skills down in a way that makes sense, and makes something that can seem like a mystery accessible to everyone! Thank you, Caroline!!!
Oh I am so glad to hear you found the talk to be manageable!! this continues my goal to make things very user friendly!!
I would so stop counting the passes. Gonna share this with my kids.
LOl thank you so much. I love that this resonated with you. I think I would for sure forget!-Caroline
This talk comes at the perfect time as we all re-emerge from the isolation of the pandemic…my social spy skills are activated! Thank you Caroline!!
I could not agree more. We are all relearning our social skills and we all need some support.
Of all the creative, engaging -- and effective -- tools you share in “Why Will No One Play With Me?” Social Spy is a favorite! It brings a basic brain-based social skill into conscious awareness so that anybody (at any age) can practice"and get better at it. We all have so much to learn about one another! Especially helpful at a time when social isolation has limited in-person experience, and social media has a very different impact on social and emotional learning.
i love the statement we have so much to learn from each other. That was one of my big personal learnings from this and the Chicago Subway experiment- people's assumptions keep us apart.
Such important work during these times! Caroline is really on the frontier of social connection!
Thank you so much! It has been a hard couple of years for being social for all of us.
Social Spy, an idea for all of us, especially after the last few years! Thank you, Caroline, for your work!!!!
People watching with intention!! So much fun. Thank you so much- enjoy !!
This was great! We all react so quickly based on what we think is true… imagine if we took the time to “spy” and learn first and then engaged with one another instead of reacting. Great advice Caroline!
Thank you so much! YEs imagine a world where we pause and spy before reacting!
What a wonderful talk! So much of what is said resonates deeply with me and I've already passed it on to several people who I know would appreciate it!
Thank you so much !! And thank you for passing it to people. Feel free to tell them they can write me for help with any questions the talk might bring up @authorcarolinem
I really appreciated this talk; so many points that resonated with me, such as how people with a lot of shyness (like myself) can be misunderstood easily as aloof, maybe arrogant. And agree that it's so important and beneficial to build self-awareness and awareness of where other people are coming from. I appreciate the point that it's not just the people who might struggle in social settings who need to build this awareness, but more socially adept people have work to do as well, to better understand all types of people.
Totally true. We need to have empathy for others and they for us. I am so glad you left this note! So many people who are shy are misunderstood. And its really not kind. And I think literally everyone can benefit from this. And I am so glad that felt good to you and resonated with you.
Thank you for sharing this Caroline! Social Spy provides a tangible way to nurture a beautiful circle of connection that positively impacts both the spy and the person being noticed or observed. Growing in awareness, recognizing assumptions, and identifying or understanding those confusing hidden social rules can be life changing for people of all ages. It empowers action to engage instead of perpetuating painful isolation. So well done! Thank you!
Thank you so much. I think this can be the one go to hack to help anyone read those hidden social rules. That is exactly it!!
Favorite take away: you spy to find out the things people don't tell you. Adhd tip is train talk=small talk. ... I used Caroline's social spy with clients of all ages and it is genius.
Thank you so much !! I love the take- away and we can all spy!!!
Such an incredible message! ❤ love watching such inspiring people with so much passion!
Thank you so much I am so glad this inspired you!!
Such needed wisdom for so many of us!
Thank you so much!! I agree!!
This is so great, Caroline - thank you for sharing your wisdom!
Thank you so much ! So glad you enjoyed this !! Caroline
Awesome. Clearly a skill that we all could use in our daily lives and should spend more time developing.
Thank you so much -- I agree everyone can do this!!
Amazing!
Oh thank you !!!
Great work Caroline!!! very helpful
Thank you so much!!
Great Talk! I would highly recommend!
Thank you so much!!
Love it! Thank you for sharing this!!
thank you so much !!
Wish the video was more inclusive. It seems to be laser focused on things that require vision.
Caroline tells it like it is! I wish I had social spy growing up.
We all do!! T
Great presentation! Very informative!
Thank you so much I am so glad it gave you information you needed!
“After watching Caroline’s Ted Talk, I have a completely different view of what it means to pay attention to “basketballs while monkeys” invade. Using this simple but powerful metaphor, Caroline presents an inspiring and practical perspective that will help you understand what it means to be a Social Spy and why it is such an important skill that can be learned. If you are challenged by reading the room and misinterpreting what is being conveyed in social situations, go watch Caroline. Not only will her engaging, enthusiastic style keep you focused, but you will walk away inspired. You will understand how becoming a Social Spy can significantly improve the quality of your relationships.”
Thank you so much! Spy can 100% improve people's relationships and daily lives!! So glad the talk spoke to you.
really wish this had closed captions :/
I totally agree. My slides did. But the tech completely fell apart during the speech and therefore the slides with closed caption did not get shared. Happy to send them to you!
Social Spy discussion @ 8:00 min
This is such an important topic and Caroline does a great job of giving actionable steps to help everyone improve their social skills. Watch it and share it!
Thank you so much !! I love that you found the steps actionable!
This TEDX piggybacks on the incredible lessons and skills shared in Caroline's Bestselling parenting/social skills book "Why Will No One Play With Play with Me." Following Caroline's work for years, I can say she is THE Social Skills Guru. I have used "SPY" in my practice and it has helped many chilodren. Caroline allows you to " count the monkeys and the passes."😉
I hope we can even notice the monkeys. Thank you for your comment. I am so glad you enjoyed this!
What happens when you have the face blindness associated with ASC?
you can still watch larger gestures, listen to how and what people say and observe what people. Lots of people I have worked with have face blindness but they learn so much from other body language.