pregnancy after loss, separation, back in the house my baby died in....there's a lot
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ก.ค. 2024
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♡ FAQs
How old are you? 27
How tall are you? 164cm
What nationality are you? Maori/European
What Country are you in? New Zealand
Hi Lovlies,
My name is Judea and I am a 27 yr old Mama of 3 - one angel, my toddler Son and another little girl on the way - living in New Zealand. This channel is a space for me to show the realities of my life after losing our daughter to SIDS. The highs, the lows and everything in between, you get a mixed bag of “content” here but always from a place of honesty.
Thank you so much for your support!
Judea x
You have decorated Evers room beautifully. My husband and I broke up while I was pregnant with our first child. He was so good. He helped replace flooring in my moms home before I moved back in with her, and he came every day after work to help care for him and bought things that he needed and took out my son from a previous relationship to keep him busy. We got back together after a year of being co parents. The love was always there. I pray that you and Brogen just get to love and raise these two beautiful babies , co parenting or eventually possibly back together. The love that your children will see from you two just being around each other and showing each other respect is so important.
This 🥹🤍🤍🤍🤍
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I pray the same for them ❤❤❤❤
My prayer ❤
My heart is breaking for your emotions you’re trying to navigate Judea. It’s been a lot of changes for your family. I really hope Ever brings you and Brogan back together as a family forEVER🩷.
I love the idea that Noah Lee is being a sweet big sister and loaning her things to her baby sister 🤍
I lost my first daughter, then had a boy, and now I have a newborn baby girl again. It's definitely difficult to see Thora wearing Kaia's clothes. If there's anything that has helped, it's that I have set aside a few very special toys, outfits, and other special things that will not be shared with baby sis. I keep them in a memorial cabinet in my living room. ❤
Lost my baby boy at 29 weeks and currently 3 months pregnant don’t know gender yet but it’s beyond hard hearing and seeing baby knowing it’s not baby brother your videos have helped me immensely through this 🥹🩵
I think you are referring to another TH-cam channel with Stefanie and Kaneron
@@anneconklin6715 yes replied to her comment 😊
I’m so sorry you know this pain 💔 I’ve done similar x Set aside some things that are just Noah-Lee’s…I want to get a beautiful keepsake box made for each baby to have “their” items 🤍
I’m so sorry for your loss 💔 Wishing you and baby a safe pregnancy and delivery 🤍
I love Ever's nursery. The whole house just gives me a calm and cozy feeling. It feels like a family home.
Oh Judea i just want to hug you. I can hear the pain in your voice. I care so much about you even though i don’t know you. I pray you heal and wish you the best outcome for you and your family. Much love ❤
🥹🥹🥹🥹 no words, thank you x
@@Itsjudeaaa your very welcome i can tell you have a big heart from this side of the screen ❤️
“EVER” is such a cute name. I don’t think I’ve ever heard of anyone with that name. Love it 💕
Adrienne bailon off the real named her baby that
@@aceofhearts0 Ohh…you’re right. Now that you mention if I DO recall that now.
Yeah i forgot too lol@@RashetaCannon
Oh she already shared her name!
@@aceofhearts0so did lea Michele
Hello there, just here to say that your home isn't broken. The concept of a 'broken home' is just stigma that reinforces the primacy a single kind of family structure. You and your co-parent are amicable and strong and working as a team to provide for your children and support their emotional wellbeing. You just happen to be living apart. Your daughter is being born into a secure and loving family dynamic - how blessed she already is! Wishing you all the best.
what you are going through is the worst most difficult thing a mother can go through. all things considered it’s still very fresh. but you’ve done a wonderful job at redecorating and navigating your feelings. you’ve got this. you’ll be okay. and Ever and Echo will grow up in a wonderful home, where they don’t know anything but love and and a dedicated mother and father. nothing else matters
You are definitely not a failure! I can't imagine walking through everything you are going through while raising a toddler and while expecting a baby girl, not to mention all the emotions that brings up...that is A LOT! Give yourself grace...you are doing amazing at juggling it all (even if it doesn't feel like it). Praying for strength, peace, and help navigating these challenging memories and emotions. Also prayers for a sweet healthy baby Ever. 🙏💜
I went through my pregnancy with my daughter separated from my hubby and we were able to pick up the broken pieces and find our way back to each other. I pray that you and your husband can do the same given the obvious amount of love you still have for eachother! You did a great job with baby girl's room I am sure Noah would be happy to share with baby sis :)
I think I you two will get back together. People make mistakes, sometimes huge. But forgiveness and reconciliation can happen and I think it probably will. I was separated from my husband when I was pregnant with my daughter. I’ve been through it. We have 2 more kids now and are happy as ever. It took forgiveness, communication, faith in Jesus and therapy.
Please please don't let your relationship with Brogan dictate your life and motherhood. You can have as many kids and have everything you want out of life and a family even if it's not with Brogan. I know it bc I am living proof. I separated from my husband after our 3rd baby. I even had my tubes tied and he also promised to get fixed too so that we'd always share our family with each other. Except before our third baby was 6 months old he had another girl pregnant and I was now infertile. I gave my motherhood to that man and all the rest of my dreams. But in the end I did end up with my soulmate whose kindness and love healed my heart and gave me all my dreams come true and even another child through IVF. Please don't make the same mistake, your soulmate is out there🙏
This gives me hope!❤
Already 31 and If I have to believe the internet, I can forget it and I am too old to start a family, a man said to me personally. When I said my mother was 34 at her last one he said "I don't know why it's so complex for you but 30+ is too old to start a family". People are so nasty online. Your response makes me happy!🪻
Oh my gosh, it hurts ME when you say that you guys aren't together anymore, and it's not even my relationship 😢
It's just that you guys are SO GREAT together!!! 😞 I really hope Brogan wants to give it another shot somewhere down the line... you guys are perfect for each other❤
I love the name you chose for your baby girl. EVER💗 It's so beautiful!!
You're so strong, Judea, but don't forget to take some time off for yourself. It is very important! 😊
Don’t worry girl, that background noise does not bother us one bit 😅
The wall you hate in Ever's room.. with the 3 photo frames....why not once Ever is born put in a photo of each of your 3 children ....big sister noah-lee in the middle surrounded by her younger siblings? ...just a idea.
That's such a good a nice idea
I can’t imagine the rollercoaster of emotions you’re going through, make sure you take care of yourself and your mental health, that’s the number one thing you can do for your babies ❤
You have came such a long way. You're an amazing mother and strong woman! So inspiring to see how much growth you have made. Keep doing what you are doing. Keep the faith!
A child being brought into the world with a loving family will never look at you as a failure. Please don’t feel that way about yourself.
Judea, I think you are one of the strongest humans on this planet and you carry all your hardships with such grace and humility. Noah-Lee, Echo, and Ever will see and know all the love you have and share with Brogan, and that’s what matters most. I’ve witnessed family’s with parents together (ex. my own) with less love and care than you two exemplify.
You’ve been through so much pain and anguish Judea, it’s incredible how you’re holding it all together. You’re so so brave, don’t forget that beautiful 💚 x
You go above and beyond! Your babies are so blessed to have you as a mommy.
What a beautiful job you’re doing with your home( and negotiating being a co parent!) That cushion with Noah Lee on it is adorable. I bet Echo is going to love his new baby sister! 🫶🏻
The nursery is beautiful 🩷🌸 I imagine there are complex emotions and navigating that is a lot to deal with, I'm sure. So much love for your family 🩷💙🩷 hope you're doing well with the pelvic pain. Can't wait for august baby girl #2 🩷🩷 Noah Lee and her siblings have such a loving mom / parents that will keep the kiddos at the center of their life. It's hard to find closure/peace. I find it hard to find ways to be at peace with loss at well. Your love of Noah Lee helps me navigate my emotions too 🩷💙🩷
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Give yourself grace love! You’re going through a lot! You’re an amazing momma! You’ve got this!!❤
Hey Judea! Baby girls room looks beautiful and cozy, also proud of you and how far you have come. I hope with some distance that you and Brogan will give it another chance. Everyone in this world deserves a second chance. Love you guys.
You’re super amazing and Strong!!! I excited for you and to see your new baby girl. Noah Lee. Will never be forgotten ❤️❤️
I have been watching from the beginning Judea and I love so much how you are conquering your fears and facing all of these trials head on with humility and grace. Keep going forward girl! We love you and you’ve got this! ❤
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Im living for the subtle pops of color you are adding to your life ❤
Everything looks beautiful, Judea. You should be really proud of yourself about how you’ve managed to move forward despite really difficult circumstances. I keep hoping that you and Brogan will get back together after some time apart and healing. Either way you are both loving and dedicated parents and your children are fortunate to have you both. Sending lots of love to you all!! ❤️
Hey mama, I’ve been watching you since the beginning and I haven’t kept up since now. I’m in awe of your strength, you are a super mama. God works in mysterious ways and I hope you rekindle your relationship ❤
you always bring me so much comfort❤ I lost a baby the same time Noah Lee passed and now I’m pregnant again and completely on my own so a lot of emotions and worries, so thank you for sharing because you are helping people you don’t even know ✨❤️
You look stunning pregnant! I’m praying for you and your husband too and for an easy, safe delivery ❤
I just wanted to say how proud of you I am. No matter what god has thrown at you, you always seem to handle with such grace and dignity. You are one strong woman and your babies are lucky to have you as their mummy! Sending you lots of love and strength from your neighbours in Australia 🥰💝
Every time I watch your videos ,I’m honestly just in awe of you ❤ your are such a wonderful mother ❤
I’ve watched you since you first started your channel and I remember crying as you told the story of Noah Lee, but now that I have a 4 month old daughter of my own I have an entirely new perspective. I can’t imagine going on after losing her.
You are stronger than you realize. It’s true- the “what if’s” and scenarios you create in your mind are what feeds your anxiety, however in your situation it is completely normal after what you have been through. I am glad things aren’t as bad as you imagined them to be, although each step is difficult. Will you have any help from your parents or in-laws with the baby? You will definitely need to rest. Your home is beautifully decorated. You should be very proud of creating such a calm and beautiful environment for you and your children. Wishing you only good things to come. 🥰🤰🏻🥰
Gorgeous nursery! It’s so lovely to see you getting excited for Ever. Beautiful name btw ❤
I love the moon & star decals, they are so cute. I love that you shared them between Echo, & Ever/Noah's room. I'm super proud of you & Brogan for working together to co-parent well. You have handled all these challenges no matter how emotionally draining they are because you're a strong Bad ass Mommy! You will probably be surprised at how different the scenario is when you bring Ever home, but even if you're triggered by things I know that you will feel those feelings & move forward because of your babies ❤️. Hang in there & don't forget how strong you are. You & Brogan both have amazing strengths you don't even realize. We can't wait for you to get to bring home another sweet baby soon!
You’re doing so well considering all of the changes in your life. The decor is beautiful and so inviting! I don’t know why things happen…they just do. Praying you get some rest. Your friend, Miss Linda 💞💞💞
You are a beautiful soul my girl never forget that, this girl will bring joy into your life again. Love from Great Barrier Island. New Zealand
Love you sweet Beautiful soul! I think baby girl is ready! Blessings! I've always loved your home. 🙏🙏🙏🙏
You’re doing fab!! No more words needed. ❤
I understand how you’re feeling but also your emotions are so high when pregnant. When you have Ever Im sure a majority of those triggers will go away and you’ll have peace and happiness ❤
Sweet Judea you've always been such a powerhouse to me. And a huge huuuge inspiration to so many women. I've been here since you started the TH-cam journey. And I just would love to thank you for sharing your story with us.
I can't wait for Noah🪽Lee to be a big sister to Ever 🤍 and Echo be a big brother to both of your little girls 🤎..
I had a missed miscarriage and it's been sooo hard for a long while. But I do know that at 14 Weeks that little girl of mine will forever be loved . I can't wait for Ever to get here. Love you so much 🩷
Oh my heart 😭 Sending you a big hug 🤍🤍
Big, big hugs❤ You are doing such a great job. Please remember to give yourself grace
Such a beautiful soul you are 🥹🩷💜🩵 all three of your babies are so lucky to have you as their mother 💕 I’ll pray for you and your heart and pray for you and your family to find guidance through this new chapter of life 💗 everyone’s family dynamics are different, not broken just different 🥰 your children have the most loving parents and you both deserve grace for doing what’s best for everyone involved 💜
Appreciate this x
Thank you for this very honest vlog, Ever's room is absolutely beautiful as well i love the colors and the moons it seems like such an inviting space
The babies room is beautiful. My heart goes out to you. 🙏🏼❤️
Hi Judea.
I would just like to thank you for teaching me how to enjoy parenthood.Looking at you,and you're way of parenting I saw the mistakes I made with my first child. In fact, I took everything for granted, I felt a bit lost and I must admit that I did not enjoy being a parent much, it was big and stressing obligation for me, and I also did not manage to connect with my child in the right way. Now it's enterely different story, watching you and your way of parenting taught me that parenting is actually the most beautiful "job" in the world and I wouldn't change it for anything.Now I am proud mother of 2 and with big hope for another blessing. I wish you and your family all the best in life. ❤️
This makes me so happy for you 🥹🥹🥹🥹
Judea I watch you from Mexico, since you first started your channel. I hear your voice and I just want to take a plane and fly all over the world just to hug you... Everything will be OK girl. In this life you will always be the mother of three beautiful babies, but in the eternal life you will be reunited with beautiful Noah Lee, so you have to remember when you feel down that you will be with her again someday. I admire you, you have a friend half way round the world! ❤
You are a beautiful mama, inside & out. Your babies are lucky to have you
Gosh it’s so nice to be seeing you regularly again ❤
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Hi Judea,
Just wanted to send you a hug 🤗 You have been through a lot. I know you love your family so much. We all make mistakes so extend some grace to yourself 🙏🏽 So excited for your new little bundle 💕 Ever. Echo is going to be crazy for his little sister 🤗 Big sister Noah Lee will always be there with all of you.
So sad to hear your pain, but it's also amazing to see your strength. I know we dont see it all, but it's clear you put one foot in front of the other and look after yourself, child and home. I hope you and hubby find your way back to each other, but i will say moving on (eventually) isn't bad or far from reality. I met my partner when i had two kids, 8 years ago now and we had one of our own and have an amazing family. Of course, at first, i could never imagine that, but now i can't imagine anything other than this.
Everything is going to be good! thrust that, repeat it every day because it will❤ what happened to you was horrible but it won’t happen again
you will have a perfect healthy baby girl and her sister is going to be so proud of you two and will always look after you from heaven ❤
Ever is a gift from noahlee.. i just feel it! That's why the same month mama.. she's a gift sent to you for a reason ❤
What a joy it will be to have another baby girl Evers room looks lovely . I hope the joy of the new baby brings some peace to your heart tho this time . Hugs to you mama .
I can’t begin to imagine the pain you feel over this situation but I hope you are able to see Ever wearing Noah-lee’s outfits as a way of her being close to her sister. Big sisters hand clothes down but usually after they are worn down that breaks my heart for you, but at the very least…. At least they get that little piece of what sisters get, in their own way. I wish I could give you a big hug. I can’t fathom going through all you are, while pregnant. U think of you often. You’re a beautiful human, Judea.
💙❤️🤍🤎🩷 Beautiful nursery that's for a beautiful baby girl that's a part of a beautiful family! You're doing your best, and that's "good enough. ".... Sending love to the 5 of you! 🥰
All 3 of your children are so happy to have you both as parents❤❤❤ Even though you're separated, I'm sure your children will have more love, attention and an example of a great relationship between parents than many other kids in non-broken homes (unfortunately). ❤❤❤
I would be incapable of decorating a nursery so elegantly, practically and thoughtfully. I wish you a trouble free pregnancy, healthy birth and wonderful baby.
Dear Judea, my heart brakes for you ❤..it takes a lot of time, not to get over or forget the trauma you’ve been through, but to learn how to live with it and be ok with it. You are doing great ❤ I wish you all the best with your baby girl and I know a lot of fears come to the surfice after the loss of Noah L., just take deep breaths and time will make it easier, everything will be ok ❤ Sending you hugs and kisses 😊
Always thinking of you, Noah-lee, Echo, and now Ever. ❤❤❤ You're so strong Judea xx
I’m so excited for you!! I can’t wait to see her! Don’t feel like a failure things happen in relationships. It sounds like there is no hope getting back with Brogan but I sure hope you guys can go to counseling and try and make it work out. I hope to see that one day. I’m just going to say that your family is so much more important to try and make it work because the grass is not greener with someone new they just have a different set of problems trust me I know!!
The nursery is so calm and beautiful. I love baby girls name too so unique. You have been and are going through so much try to be kind to yourself ❤
Just remember to take of yourself too beautiful lady 💜 you got this !
I love how you decorated everything 🥰
Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability.
My friend I always hold on to hope that you and brogan will get back together you're a beautiful family❤❤❤❤❤
I love that baby girls name is EVER might be biased though since my sons name is EVER lol
I love that you incorporated some of Noah-Lees things for Ever's nursery.
Sending you so many hugs and just good positive vibes. ❤❤❤
u always do such a great job at decorating and providing for your pēpi mama ❤
“Hello little babies” is my daughter’s favourite book. She is almost 5. But it is still number one when I say “go pick a book for bedtime” 💕
I wish the best for you and your beautiful family. I hope you know that you're doing great momma. I am so grateful for you Judea ❤. Love from the Midwest 🤎
I don't know you and Brogan's situation nor do I need too, but I wanted to say that as a child of separated parents, the way in which the two of you are co-parenting is beautiful. It is something I think you should be proud of.
You should be so proud mama
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This is indeed very heartwarming and very wonderful and very beautiful and this brings back such great memories of when I use to be a 90s kid and an early 2000s kid and I am a new subscriber as well:).
You look absolutely beautiful and healthy. Congratulations and I wish the best for you guys 😊❤
I pray and hope that you two can mend your relationship and get back together 😊
Wishing y’all the best 💛
Love the name you chose, I know you will be so excited to dress another baby girl, I have 2 girls and one son who are all grown with children of their own praying for you and Brodie (hope that's spelled right)
You are such a beautiful mother, kia kaha xx
Hi Judea I hope you’re doing well. I just lost my first born baby boy this past November. He was born at 24 weeks and his whole life was lived in the nicu until he got an infection which turned into sepsis and he passed away. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever or will have gone thru in any life time. We want to start trying again but I have to wait until October so it will be 1 year for the c section scar to heal but I am terrified of being pregnant again because of everything that happened so I feel your fear when u say u are scared something could happen to any of ur babies at any point. But I am trying to move forward with a clean slate like u said and always honor my beautiful son but also create a life for my future babies as well. The way I think about it is in a way it will make us better moms just knowing first hand how precious each moment with our babies are. And also teaching them from a young age that this life is just temporary and to be the best person and live each day with purpose. I wish u luck and congratulations on your pregnancy ❤️❤️
Awww prayers for you sweetie ❤🙏🏼 beautiful home 🙂
I kept getting confused when you’d say phrases like ‘for Ever & what Ever’ (like forever & whatever 😂) especially hearing ‘forever/ for Ever’ so much while thinking about what happened to Noah-Lee kept making me emotional, sending hugs ❤
Such a beautiful and unique name
Love it x
This all comes from a loving place and from working from childcare - you can do whatever you’d like with your baby of course. I found out that the wedge pillow that you showed that’s kind of like a donut actually is a suffocation hazard, if baby does happen to roll even in infancy, the right space makes it hard for them to turn backwards. You look stunning btw!
Important for others to know it’s not for sleeping, i should have said this! It’s for use when I am with baby girl and need hands free. Ever has a very safe Snoo bassinet for her sleep 🥰
Jude’s your doing great I know sometimes it doesn’t feel right and
I hear it in your voice but you got this it’s going to be better than you think baby girl is going to bring light into your and echo’s life and of course Brogan and yes 1st are going to be hard but once you go thru them it will be easier and Noah Lee will be with you every step of the way wanting you to be happy and enjoying her sister the way you always enjoyed her
First comment 🎉 Love you Judea !
You are a wonderful mama❤
Ever is a BEAUTIFUL name!
Wishing you happiness and joy ❤
Congratulations on your baby girl ❤ you look so beautiful and glowing cant wait for you to meet her .. the name is perfect ❤.... Silent watcher
Noah Lee is being a wonderful big sister from Heaven 👼🎀💕 The room for Ever is beautiful 🫶🦄💕 Sending love love and prayers for a healthy pregnancy 🤰🏻🌸🌼🎀💗 From Debra in Maine 🥰😊
I love the name! Could you explain the meaning behind it in another video? When did you find out she is a girl?
Beautiful nursery❤ can you share what bedside bassinet you have and if you like it? I’m trying to choose one currently.
I can uderstand why you've called your new baby Ever and i think its a very pretty name i wish you all the very best with everything you do ❤❤❤xxx ❤❤❤
Just because you’re not living together doesn’t mean Ever is being born into a broken home, far from it. Nobody knows or understands your situation better than the both of you and you wouldn’t have made the decision to separate if it wasn’t the right thing for you both at this point in time and that has no bearing on you both as parents.
You have both been through so much and sometimes you need to just step back and get a new perspective for a while. You are battling so many emotions, new and old and rightfully so that some will be confronting for you. I think you should be so proud in how you are handling everything.
You are only human and you are allowed to be scared and happy and go through all of those feelings without thinking you are doing something wrong. There is no right or wrong way to feel about your situation because it is just that, your situation, and even though there might be people with similar situations, this is something that is just for you only. No matter how it ends up making you feel, especially with Ever being due in the same month as Noah, you are entitled to feel it and good or bad that feeling is real and it’s needed.
I think everything that has happened for you, you coming full circle has happened for a reason and you are meant to be bringing Ever home to Noah’s home.
Hi Judea, so lovely to hear from you and how your going. Praying for you that God's peace rests your mind and heart . Sending lots of love to you and family from Australia. Psalm 62. May God bless and keep your beautiful family always 💗🌸
I really relate to what you were saying about changing decor in Noahlee's room. It was very hard for me to take down my first daughter's nursery.
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