Son Cut Ties and Abandoned OP, Hiring a Lawyer to Not Contact Him After She Grounded Him, Took Al...
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ก.ค. 2024
- 00:00 1st story:
AITA for Punishing my Son Harshly for a Prank on a Vulnerable Person? (u/AITAWasITooHarshMom in r/AmItheAsshole)
16:33 2nd story:
AITAH for not doing anything for my step children anymore after being called names and filing for a divorce from my husband after he didn’t back me up? (u/External_Ad8238 in r/AITAH)
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Op: "we made him write an apology letter"
Me: "totally fair"
Op: "then we took 800 bucks from him"
Me: "that's quite alot of money but ok"
Op: "then we took his car and gave it to his half sister"
Me: "in my experience that kind of thing rarely goes well but alright"
Op: "then we grounded him for a month"
Me: "4 different punishments seems excessive but ok."
Op: "then we canceled the most important birthday of his entire life."
Me: dude...
Back in the day people just hit their kids and moved on.
@@georgeprchal3924 That boy had his dads permission to throw hands if either of them touched him 😂😂😂
Moms definitely leaving stuff out too, serves her right, but it’s a shame about the younger daughter, I can bet the stepfathers gonna be acting up now that the free moneys drying up.
@@TheChimeraDude I mean people didn't do grounding, just punches.
I never trust womens stories when they frame people as bad and them as perfect.
There has to be more to this story
@@TheChimeraDude Agreed something seemed off as soon as she mentioned not getting along with her second husband.
First story:
The woman is evil. She talks about how hard it is to lose a son, yet she had no guilt over taking the son away from the father just to hurt him. I hope she gets behind on child support and goes to jail, just like the father would if it were reversed!
Same here! And I also hope her son keeps her grandchildren away from her, to get even with her, and warns her that if she goes anywhere near his kids, he'll have her locked up for attempted kidnapping!
@Martin42081Aww, thank you 💛
It's really fucked up at how she thinks she has any right to be sanctimonious when she let her pet loser to abuse her son for years.
Jack pulled a dick move, but he's more mature than she is because at least he recognizes what he did was wrong and didn't lash out at his sister. OOP abused and let her loser abuse her son for years, obviously playing favorites with her new daughter using money from his child support no less and thinks she has a leg to stand on, pure narcissism.
She can't get behind on child support, the kid is 18.
She fought for custody hoping to prevent her son from becoming the obviously toxic bullying shitstain dirtbag lawyer dad. She clearly failed because the soon is as big of a piece of shit as his dad. And fuck YOU for defending them.
You know, at first I was saying "That kid is an asshole for pranking an autistic kid", but the longer the story went on, the more I saw that his mother was truly the problem. Reminds me of my mother, allows her anger and indignation to get the best of her.
Honestly sounds like shes better off without him. Her son is a prick just like his dad. They'll both end up hating each other in the end cuz pricks hate other pricks.
He's still a PoS like his parents.
Glad I am not the only one who is having a hard time to empathize with the mom... she spends all that child support on a fancy home (no wonder Jack feels ownership over it), support Tom's "joke" about abusıng her child... and that's just what she's willing to tell (I am 10 minutes in).
Jack is TA for that prank, his dad is TA for planting negative seeds in his son's mind, Tom is TA for demanding respect he never earned, and OP is TA for abusıng her power as a wife, in the divorce, and as a mother. ESH!
The POS dressed up as a gorilla to torment an autistic kid for no reason. His mom seemed like a garbage wife, but seemed like a fine mother.
Dan told her the truth at the end. She lost her son because of her anger and indignation yet it could have been a teaching moment. Now her piggy bank is closed and she is gonna have to cry while paying those bills or probably go to jail for missing child support payments. She admits to being a bad wife, a bad ex-wife, a bad mom and being bad with money.
the mom lived over what she could afford and spend the child support on a house, doesn‘t stop her hubby from threatening her son and acts like a bitch what did she expect.
The prank was bad but the punishment didn‘t fit
Spending CS on the house would be, IMO, ok if the house was for the both of them, after all the kid needs a roof over his head. But when she puts 3 more people under that same roof living off that same CS it becomes a problem. I would call it fraud really.
Seems like they didn't provide anything for him instead they took from the child support they got. At one point during the meeting I think they suggest returning the car if not the money. The car was most likely paid for by the dad's money. OP said they called her to humiliate her but seems like they were giving her a last chance and documenting it
the punishment did fit, tho looks like she had been failing before that
I agree. OP has only herself to blame for Jack going no-contact.
@@sohanpanda The father said it the best. They didn't call her there to humiliate her, they called her there so she could humiliate herself.
Story 1.
Girl what did you expect to happen? you admit to treating your ex-husband like shit During the marriage, you admit to trying to force a relationship between your son and Tom, when your son acted "out of character" you didn't talk to him and ask "why?" you Only punished him, and your main form of punishment appears to be removing his personal belongings and giving some to his Step-sister.
His prank was a stoopid fuckin prank we can all see and understand that including himself.
Don't be a stoopid mother and allow your son to go do what he's going to do until he's ready to talk to you.
"he hasn't ever gotten this bad" and yet they pull out all the stops for the punishment and don't even think about using their grown-up communication skills. He should've had things taken away but outright given away was a step too far. He didn't learn anything other than his mother will pull the rug out from under him.
@@dagoth-ursbeekeeper9119 he learned a good lesson, he is behind his step father who is just at the start line waiting to et greenlight so he can beat him, and behind his golden child sister, he might be an asshole, but what the fuck did anybody expect
What her son did was cruel and he should’ve been punished for that. The victim will be stuck with that memory for life.
However that doesn’t make the mother innocent.
Story 1: she admits to being a horrible mom and wife. He kept her ex's son away and she uses child support for a luxe house and not her child. What the son did was sh*tty but did she expect him to not hate her when she did all that to him?
I don't understand why this woman posted? She isn't sympathetic in the least and some might say she got her own Karma for being such a rotten wife and mother. I thought I was missing something as she admitted she's a rotten, vengeful woman who can't get over anger issues. ;-)
Agreed. I mean who buys a house that they can ONLY afford with child support payments.... Knowing that the payments are going to end. Like totally separate from the story. That's a dumb AF decision to begin with.
The fact she kept ignoring and glossing over the questions on why they divorced and what happened during the divorce says it all.
Dan even said her biggest issue is she cares more about her anger than her son
@@dj_menyo839 american women are an enigma.
My father told me it’s usually a mistake to punish your child out of anger; wait until you’ve calmed down.
Your dad sounds wise
It's usually a mistake to do anything out of anger.
Exactly. Your father is a wise man. I believe this story would have been entirely different if OP had calmly spoken to Jack about what he did before punishing him.
@@suzannepatterson3445not just that, her punishment was like 10 on top of eachother for something that she even admitted was out of character and that peer pressure was involved. He messed up for going through with it, but she was worse for how she handled the whole thing. Taking the 800 with a mild grounding would have been fine. Doing that and giving the car to the stepsister, and canceling his last birthday as a teen just took it too far.
What your dad said applies to anything. Anger can only generate stupid decisions
"Tom has way, way dialed things down from what he would normally do." Translation: "If Jack wasn't bigger than him, Tom would abuse him physically until he got his way."
And OP would have let him. She said she wouldn't, but she also said she'd give the money back to not loose her son and that was also a lie.
S1: OP's essentially a narcissistic gold digger using her ex husband's money for herself instead of her child, she's with a literal bum and wonders why Jack doesn't respect Tom, and instead of just taking away his electronics and making him apologize to the girl he pranked, they took the nuclear option to the point where I think OP and Tom just hate Jack. Also, OP keeps talking about the mortgage. That's very telling, like she only wanted Jack for a check.
Despite their issues, I feel bad for Dan, Jack, and Alyssa 🤦🏽♂️
Same here. And given OP didn't get an invitation to her son's wedding, she doesn't deserve to ever see her grandchildren. Other than that, the only reason OP went on Reddit is because she wants everyone to feel sorry for her.😒
She got roasted on Reddit too and got a bunch of people calling her out permanently banned from Reddit too.
@@laquietagray9323Damn.
Probably doesn't want to divorce Tom because she wants his paycheck later on when he's back to work. I can smell it being the underlying reason. Alyssa being too precious is not a sentiment that sounds realistic, considering her story so far.
No question that the son behaved like an absolute shit stain pranking that poor girl. I even agree that lawyer dad has sewed a lot of seeds. He's no angel. But OP is the exact kind of rancid, raging, perpetual victim that they make sitcoms about. She talks more about her ex, her house, and her lifestyle than about the good parts of her life. She ripped up her marriage, distanced her son, married a loser who thinks it's funny to joke about beating kids (and supports his assholish "old school" parenting), quadrupled his punishment beyond sanity, and at the end can't pay for her fancy house and is even saying she'd drop her disabled husband if it meant getting her kid back. This woman is the ultimate pinecone.
seemed like she was talking about her current dilemma. trust me when i say that if she was as bad as you think she wouldn't have admitted to any wrongdoings....
He was a teenager that was offered 800 bucks + peer pressure. Kid aint as much of an ass as we think really. Most of us would accept that offer even without the peer pressure
@@HaxkarlI think if you believe that, that says more about you than anyone else
@@hopelessromantic378617 year old doing dumb shit for money no never
Everyone’s a toxic pos.
See, as an autistic person, I kinda feel glad that the parents were mad at him for giving in to peer pressure and doing a prank that honestly would’ve scared me shitless if I even went to prom and saw that as a bystander, never mind the poor “date” of this kid. HOWEVER, his punishment shouldn’t have been like 4 punishments in one. Like… you take the electronics? A classic punishment, but kinda light for this crime. You make him give her the money and apologize? Fits the crime perfectly. Cancelling his birthday? Fuck no. Taking away the car? Mixed feelings but heavily leaning towards a second fuck no. Putting all of them in one? What the fuck, OP?
Just give the poor girl the money that was raised with the purpose of *ruining her senior prom* and make him apologize-apologize. It takes a lot of people on the spectrum a TON of effort, energy, and sometimes masking, to go to events and areas with a lot of people and sounds and bright lights. She was probably on Cloud 9 that he had asked her and was probably so excited to have someone with her during a stressful but once-in-a-lifetime event/experience… only for him to show up in a fuckin gorilla suit for a handful of Benjamins? He’s obnoxious, but you, OP, are cruel.
I also have Autism, and I dealt with bullying in Middle School and High School because of it. I still think OP went too far. She didn't want her son to learn, grow, and be better in the future - she wanted her son to *suffer* . She wanted him to hurt as much as possible to sate her own emotional anger. Honestly, her screaming at her child for hours, and letting her husband do the same, is the exact moment where I think she went too far. A parent should only scream at their child if it's a matter of life or death.
You know what's a big clue as to how bad she is? Something she dropped in there and then moved on. She hates her ex (Dan) so much, she takes it out on the son. She said "she thinks Dan somehow had a hand in what her son did", not under peer pressure, or how and what he did to that girl. Now why would you automatically jump to that conclusion, what evidence would lead her to believing that, unless she has a "Blame Dan" mentality? The other thing she did, she confiscated the phone and had all communication for two weeks (she thought) blocked. Now why would a mother have access to the father of the son blocked? She saw a opportunity to justify her son access to the father.
My sisters ex was smart enough in the divorce, to have it so even though she had physical custody, if he paid for the phones and the family plan, she was REQUIRED to make sure the children called him every other evening. He could do the father thing and ask about homework, or BF/GF etc. He knew how my sister was, she had done it before, tried to alienate the kids to him and ground them and block them from talking to him for weeks at a time. By requiring the every other night phone call, she couldn't pull that stuff any more, if she was abusing the kids they could tell him. If she didn't have them call every other night, then that was a red flag she was up to something. She played her games and lost custody to him and the kids have gone almost no contact with her because of the emotional abuse she subjected them to.
@@jamestown8398 100% agree! And I think your comment is the best I've seen here.
@@mattstorey7256its shocking how similar your sister and OP sound here. You sure they aint the same person?
@@CainEverest They are not. But sadly its not a uncommon thing to happen. Somehow many women and a few men think they are the sole "gatekeeper" of their children and aren't above using the children as weapons. Our biased family courts reward women for false allegations, rather than assume the father is innocent and work to proving his guilt, they believe her and make him prove his innocence. This allows her the time to poison the children's minds against the father and him not able to be present to disarm the propaganda. In my sisters case, she was so overconfident she could do so and get away with it that she went too far and actually alienated the children against herself.
They were old enough to understand that she was controlling their access and the narrative and they were not fooled by the smoke and mirrors she did when they were younger (to be fair, their father wasn't any better than she was, when they were young.) He had a good lawyer that had seen all the crap that goes on during the divorce and post divorce process and advised him. He was wise enough to listen. She on the other hand didn't, she fought and ignored what her lawyer did for her, even going so far as to take the good deal she got and try and renegotiate even more, even as the process was being finalized. Threw a fit when my parents and my siblings wouldn't fork up even more for her to get another lawyer to try and re-litigate a already generous divorce decree. She decided to "punish" everyone by cutting off ties and limiting them and the children's contact to them. That came back to bite her ass as well.
His lawyer had him actually give more short term alimony and more than required child support. But the alimony had a termination date and for the increased amount he got the agreement on the phones and the no leaving the state without 6 months prior written notice stuff. Him paying child support, even when the kids were living with him far longer than "temporary" and her wasting the alimony/time on herself rather than getting a stable home situation for her and the kids, got her custody terminated later on, when the money ran out and the games she played came to light. She couldn't provide a stable home for them, a court ordered requirement of her.
story 1.: apart from the 800 that OP took from her son. OP seems to take her ex husband to the cleaner when they r divorced. she make the ex husband pay for high child support which op used it NOT for her son, but for OP to live and support her new husband and stepchild, on top of that, OP also give her son's car to her stepdaughter. and now she wonder why the son's hate on her. again, even till the last words. OP still saying, she now need more money bcoz she no longer accepted the child support from her ex husband. hope OP enjoying her life w/her husband that doesnt work and step daughter.
The son wasnt a saint hes a bad person just like his dad is. They treat anyone they view as beneath them the poor,l and disabled so badly if they werent rich theyd be in the hospital getting their asses kicked so much. Hopefully the son stops listen to his dad and actually grows into an adult that people wanna be around but he probably thinks like his dad. People love me not my money when no they hate him but love using him for his money. I get wanting to seperate a kid from a terrible influence like the dad. Dad is a narc and sounds like he raised one as well.
@@Kris-wo4pj I am not sure about that, I have seen ok people do dumb things when money and peer pressure gets involved. And as far the step-father goes I think the Son didn't respect him for obvious reasons. He seems to be enforcing rules without any real contributions for the son. You can become a step parent by marrying but you can't become a parent figure by expecting your step son to do chores when you have nearly no seeming contributions to him. OP states that the son is good to everyone else including his step sister who he seems to be in contact with. I also don't see where the dad is the AH, he is probably a bit arrogant but so far he doesn't seem to have done something shitty, OP freely admits she treated him badly and it seems he is just returning it. Even OP didn't say anything bad about her Ex, she even goes to say that her current marriage is falling apart and she is just in it for the sake of the step daughter, how do you expect the son and his dad to show respect to a guy OP doesn't seem to be showing too much herself
@@Kris-wo4pj lol no kiddo
@@Kris-wo4pj You are happily ignoring the fact that Jack didn't actually want to do the prank. It wasn't even his idea. It was his buddies who came up with it and even then he said no until they collected money and essentially bribed him into doing it.
800 bucks is quite a bit of money for 17 yo. Add to that the peer pressure. I probably would've done it when I was 17.
But everyone is putting the entire blame on Jack, as if he was the one who came up with the idea and did it all on his own just to be mean to the girl.
What other evidence were there that Jack treated the poor and disabled badly, other than the prank, that wasn't his idea and that he didn't want to do, and Tom, who by all accounts seems to have been an AH that deserved it and the treatment had nothing to do with him being disabled and everything to do with his attitude?
Well, given OP was using the child support to live and support her new husband and stepchild, and not on her son, Jack, if Jack ran away from OP and Tom, at 17, gravitated toward/moved in with a new girlfriend who's a dropout/party fiend, got her pregnant out of wedlock, married her for the baby, dropped out of high school, moved into public housing in a violent neighborhood, worked one or more minimum wage jobs, lived on government assistance, Medicaid, and food stamps, and not only would Jack have the courts force OP to give up the child support money, and the $800, in order for him to pay for baby supplies/necessities, baby-related expenses, plus, his new girlfriend's maternity/pregnancy expenses, he would also make OP his 'round-the-clock' babysitter/housekeeper, made her stepdaughter his additional babysitter/'round-the-clock' chauffeur (given OP give her Jack's car), made her take his new girlfriend to her OB appointments, Lamaze classes, shopping for baby, and maternity clothes, and to the hospital, when her water breaks, plus, let his new girlfriend turn Alyssa's room into a nursery/daycare center, and do more of the same, if he had another kid, at 18.⚠️
1st story, OP reaped what she sowed, did she actually think what she did was appropriate? She has lost her son forever and still doesn't think what she did was wrong.
The more the mom talked, it became clear why the son is the way he is.
So mom literally was using child support to fund her life. And she couldn’t bend at all to get her son back so she deserves that happened
Screw that. She sucks but the son is a dumb POS as well. Pretty much the sister and step dad are the only decent people in the whole story.
Yeah. If you’re divorced, and have a child with your ex, then spending even a penny of that money on anything other than your child is highly immoral.
@@jamestown8398called child support for a reason?
@@aliatar9325but don't the child support on your new husband and stepdaughter, like the house and car that was bought with child support money.
Agreed. No power is greater than the power of karma.
Story 1. The husband cant work or mow the lawn but he was able to hop out the bathroom window?
New husband all barking no bite 😂 👌 old ex husband bark bite spit and more bite 😂 🤏
Could you imagine being this ex husband. Your unpleasant wife destroys your family to marry a pet loser and live off his money. Then takes your son and moves acoss the country...
@trentberry6968 and not only that but you have to give her a fuckton of cash, most of which isnt even being used on your goddamn kid?? Man, this woman reaped what she sowed
Story 1: OP is such a loser. Her paycheck and butler ran away. The more the story goes on, the worse she gets. My god, is she the AH.
I bet that the prank was something she came up with to save face.
Well said. If the son had run away from her, at 16, found solace with a a new girlfriend who's a loser, has a kid with the dumpster fire, ditches high school, and works dead-end jobs, OP would become HIS paycheck and maid, plus, her stepdaughter will be his 'round-the-clock' nanny/chauffeur.
@@danacarter9147
you've commented this a couple times, but it has not relevance to the story, infact it's quite the opposite of what happened.
the son is engaged to a girl that is apparently his high school sweet heart and they are both going to good schools, I also very much could see the son going to his dad over his mum if he found himself in this oddly specific circumstance you keep mentioning.
this just seems like some weird projection to defend his mother for her leeching off the child support money.
And her bum of a husband doesn't want to stay either. So happy for her
Bro had a point. No matter how nice he is, for a teenager 800$ is 800$
Yeah, everyone seems to ignore that it wasn't his idea to do the prank. And that he didn't want to do it but had to be bribed and peer pressured by his friends into doing it. And that is quite a bit of money for a 17 yo.
@@nehcrumdid anyone bring this up to the coach? The coach at my old high school would have been pissed that team chose to stoop that low.
I'm willing to bet that she made up that prank part to save face
Mean while his dad is rich so he didn't even need the 800$. I will never say the mother is good, because if she was he would value his morals over his money. The he's a Teenager thing is bogas to, don't accuse all teenagers of having a monetary value on their morals. The fact of the matter is his A-hole parents taught him that money and impressing your peers is more important than integrity.
@@ttjc3696 i mean op is crying more about how without the child support she isnt gonna be able to support her deadbeat husband
That old school mentality of kids should listen is based on presumed respect. Respect for people who've built and maintain what you have. But they're going broke without child support after the kid leaves. The kid was the breadwinner
I remember story 1. I still don't get why the punishment was about taking away his stuff rather than apologizing to the victim. It seems they just wanted to shout at him rather than make him learn from it, no wonder he left asap.
he is a demon spawn, no shit he left asap
@@ShiNijuuAKLmommy Satan makes sure to rasie him well
@@ShiNijuuAKLhow is he a demon spawn? did you even heard the story?
this was a one off yah what he did was wrong but are just ignore the fact op actively tried to alienate him from his father? and have d-bag tom try and force a relationship with him?
like bruh no the son was wrong for the prank but he's no demon spawn
@@HeoBaby24What he did wasn't just wrong but full evil shit. I'm not defending OP anywhere so stop.
I am not autistic but if you pulled that prank on me when I was younger I would probably gotten traumatized for like a decade at least. This kind of insane cruelty should not be tolerated ever. He is a demon spawn, most people wouldn't think of doing something so cruel just because they were young.
@@ShiNijuuAKL
He was a victim of the prank as well, instead of going to prom with his girlfriend, he ended up going in a gorilla suit, so he was the butt of the joke as well, makes me wonder why he was so desperate for the money of his dad is rich
6:32 Oh curious the child support was not actually going to the Child. It was going towards paying HER mortage. It should be illegal to spend child support money not on the child.
She spent 5 times the time talking about the money than about her son.
8:14 well Tom was literally living of the money the mother was stealing from her son
16:14 if she didn't like the Hotel her ex paid for using his money she could have always booked a room herself.
Legally speaking using cs for the house is allowed so long as it improves the quality of life for the kid.
@@tatkkyo9911it’s not allowed to use it all on the house and only benefit yourself and not the child.that house is hers and not the kids it would never benefit him. If she couldn’t afford to have a house without child support then the kid should have lived with the dad.
I remember this story and yeah the mom is a piece of work by living outside her means relying on her kid to pay the mortgage and keeping her son away from his dad while forcing her new husband on her son. Yes what her son did was wrong 100000% but what she did is worse.
No it isn't. Being cruel to a disabled person for money is far worse.
@@commoguru One is a dumb teen with a still developing brain giving into peer pressure to do a mean one-off prank, the other is an adult woman who admitted to being horrible and using the court system to maliciously legally and financially abuse her ex for years so she can live beyond her means and marry a loser who hates her son and preaches corporal punishment for children. The last update even showed she saw her son as nothing but a steady paycheck for her and was just "me me me" in the end.
I think she's worse by a fair bit.
@@commoguru And that is your opinion.
Yeah the son did a cruel prank. She was actively stealing from him, his father and being horrible throughout. For years.
Where did he learn bully behavior?
STORY 1. So OP created a perfect storm of self-destruction.
1. OP was a total bitch during a divorce. According to the way OP sounds the marriage broke down because of either time, or OP was at fault. I wouldn't be surprised if she cheated on Tom.
She made the divorce difficult. Most likely abused the courts to get primary custody and from that her ex-husband's money. Her entire lifestyle is devoted to her ex-husband's money. So she just used her son as a surrogate ATM.
2. She tried to force a relationship between her son and his stepdad. Tried to replace her ex-husband.
3. She went WAY too far in punishment. Her son is in the wrong but according to OP's words, she often has these tirades. She was an abusive wife and an abusive mother.
At the end of the day, Jack was right. OP would rather destroy her life than admit she was wrong. Her anger has no cool down and she is willing to trade in her son against her pride. Her ex-husband left her because she was abusive, and wouldn't be surprised if she cheated. She used her child support to support her lifestyle, and now that it is gone she is set to go downhill fast.
I tip my hat to Dan for his patience and ability to play the long game. I do the same, I have waited 8 years and got 2 more when my son will be 18.
Keep records and a journal bud..."aug 13 my kid has a school event today, wish i could go."
Or record when they have games..and whenevrr you think about them.
So they know that you have always felt that way and it will make your kids a lot more secure in their choice to re-establish a relationship with you
OP should have grounded her son ( without her husband weighing in), reminded him that such a prank is not acceptable. Have him post a public apology to the girl and then tell him to split the money - since she helped him " earn it".
That's reasonable
and her aon can finally move out of that toxic ass environment bruh a grown ass man now op can't ground him
Kid's an asshole for what he pulled, but considering it took $800 for him to do it... honestly, that amount would tempt a lot of teenagers to do crazy stuff, let alone the peer pressure from his team on top of it. Grounding, confiscating electronics, and taking the dirty money all felt par for the course of a punishment for what he did, but canceling a big milestone birthday party and giving the car to his sister instead took things from "deserved punishment" to well into "I actually hate my kid now" territory. Considering she can't help but admit she was genuinely terrible to her ex even while trying to besmirch his character (and said dragging amounted to "he plans things!") definitely raised some flags on her nature, and the step father being some "bring back paddlin'" wannabe tough guy Texan type that talks big but can't do much is nothing short of one of the most hateable personality types to be around, doubly so as a step father that wants to force his will into someone else's kid. Then the mother starts talking about how her kid is a scheming type just like his father supposedly is... she definitely resented him before his mean prank. Considering how hostile everyone is to each other, I doubt he'll be talking to her for years to come.
Story 2 is a total swing around and the only thing OP did wrong was not be more blunt and hard on the step kids lol
I always believe that there is a certain amount of basic respect we give other people ,whether we raise or lose that respect is up to us and the stepfather coming In trying to boss the kid around while mooching from his mother while she use the child support to pay for her lifestyle,I would not respect him either just because he is demanding to be respected, from the son perspective they are both moochers, the mom admitted that she doesn’t know the girl but that she only staying In the marriage for said girl so I don’t think she like the step father either heck I’m not sure she likes the kids with those statements she might just want the child support
Guys let’s be real, it’s $800
the step dad was just waiting to be told that he can beat up op's kid
@@cototototorra7106And wind up in jail.
The thing that really bothers me is even towards the end of the post she said that her ex-husband thought that maybe she would choose Love over her anger and she was still talking shit. This just goes to show that some people do not deserve to be parents I certainly agree with basically you know, taking away his electronics and grounding him and making him write an apology letter to the girl that he took the prom. I feel as though she did fuck up when she took away the car that she was going to give him as a graduation present as well as canceling his birthday party. I also did not understand why she thought that her son was scheming against her and trying to get a laugh out of seeing her again when the, father of her son told her that he had convinced their son to see her for that last time. As a parent, you should want to make a relationship with your son when you fucked up the relationship in the first place. The fact that you went through a crappy hotel room and meeting up with your son and he’s telling you that you have to pay him back that money you should’ve just jumped on it if you really wanted to see your son again and being his life. The amount of pain that I would feel if I fucked up the relationship that had with my son and I got another chance to redeem that relationship I would jump on it. Granted I would not treat my husband like absolute dog shit just to turn around and use the money that I got from child support from him to support my broke ass husband who basically seems like a bum at this because he’s not doing anything. She reaped what she sewed in that whole entire story.
Sounds like dad loves his son and mom likes dad's money in story 1.
I know most are talking about the first story, but the second… damn.
The Egg Donor really did a number on everyone. Manipulated her kids against their better stepmom, made her ex feel her love again and ignored OP and then when OP put her foot down and went through the divorce, she left.
I feel bad but they brought it all to themselves. I feel more bad for OP who was the better mother and wife yet they treated her badly and then ask for forgiveness when Egg Donor left again.
No ex-husband has two divorces. First, his wife left him and the kids and second, he didn’t do anything to defend her from his ex and kids, and now regrets it when his ex vanished once more.
First story, it seems OP set herself up to fall down. While the son may not have been an angel, the OP's "punishment" was overkill, and made what already was a bad situation worse. She chose the hill to die on, so she really shouldn't whine now that she has to bear her cross...
The kid screwed up but mom screwed up worse by going overboard on the punishment. Giving his car to his stepsister and cancelling his 18th birthday. Nope. No wonder he left.
Story 1: What if he did the prank because he needed the money for the engagement ring? Sounds like he was just as humiliated as the girl. Dude went to prom in a gorilla costume and couldn't go with his GF. Sounds like the mom probably didn't let him get a job and never gave him any money. If he did get a job, who would take care of the house and her deadbeat BF? Im thinking this kid probably wasn't as much of an A-hole as we think.
I’m rather certain that the girl who was pranked didn’t exactly mind that much and the son probably realized that after all these years his father was right about his mother.
@@enderbirds3814 As a girl with autism that was object of both bulying and pranks (and I see distinction there)... it would sting if someone did it while laughing at me as if I was r******d but... honestly? If I was told they are being paid and especially how much I would probably go along with it (and probably ask for a small cut for pretending I am distraught and make it more entertaining for idiots).
Tho I also didn't go to my prom, there was no point in me going as it would be just a boring and loud gathering of people that I would have to pay for...
Story 1:
OP should have sent him to a counsellor instead of taking his car and money after grounding him. Also, taking child support and using it for your the f is wrong with you?? The son and his father aren’t saints but neither is OP
Story 2:
Go NC, if the mom comes back again they will treat you the same way again.
And I know damn well a child doesn’t need $25k month to survive
Small edit I meant birthday party, she should have given the money to the girl, then informed the parents and coach and took him for counselling, instead like a bloody 5 year old she let her anger take control of her and ruined her own life. As I said the son and his father might not be in the right here, but the mother chose her pride over her son.
Op ta op shouldn't have let hubby dicipline or deal with her son knowing thier relationship. Op you did this. Wooow you blew up your whole life so you and your hubby can prove a point. Hows that anger doing for you op?
St1: yes OP stole the money. It is funny how she was willing to return the car, but not the money. She is ridiculous. Her son should be punished but what she did was overkill. And she wouldn't back down. She deserves everything she got.
I would understand if she gave the money to the autistic kid but she literally stole it. How can she be ok with this? Glad to read she had to sell the house. No house and no son for the sake of 800 dollars
Not to mention the car. A sibling shouldn't have privileges that came out of other sibling s punishment
OP talked a big game about how she’d do anything and everything to not lose her son, but when the time came she decided not to because she was angry. She chose her pride over her son, knowing full well it was her last chance.
I hope OP loses her house.
The mom gave his “date” the money. She was willing to give the car back but didn’t think he should get the money from the prank on principle.
@mlbhighlights2756 it's principle, not principal😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
@@quadryjohnson2099 Thanks. Edited.
She did give the money to the autistic girl.
The fact that ahe knew exactly how the custody support works tells me that she saw her son as a meal ticket first and a son second
This woman used this kid’s child support to take care of her unemployed husband and his child and house them all. She used his child support money to buy him a car, his electronics, and the spending money, but she took it to her stepdaughter. No, Dan needs to take her to the cleaners.
1st story: Mom is a piece of work. She went overboard on the prank. He should have been forced to return the money to the friends, not pay the girl. Taking the car, grounding him until he left, canceling his birthday, etc. was overboard.
Tom sounds like a loser who's milked a work injury and found a sugar mommy to glomp onto. She handled building the relationship between her son and him poorly.
She lapped up excessive child support and instead of living within her means and using the excess to provide for her son, she spent it like the money faucet would never turn off, shacked up with her unemployed loser of a new man.
She blames her ex, but besides being there for his son when she got out of pocket, there's no real evidence of it. He put her up in a hotel and paid for her to fly to NYC. He's not obligated to do any of that, she doesn't get to whine it wasn't in the Ritz.
She said she'd do anything for her son, but when provided with clear instructions of what to do, she refused. The kid didn't care about the money or the car, he wanted to see if she actually had remorse. Like her ex said. She made a fool of herself. She put her righteous indignation over her son.
Yes, the son did a incredibly fucked up thing. But she still needed to be on his side and teach him to be better. Not just let her anger and rage control her.
she would have gave everything away if it mean she only had to apologize and have everything back to the status quo
Mom moved a loser and his daughter into the house, treated her son like crap and then wonders why her son doesn't want to deal with her.
Agreed. Soon, she'll also wonder her son won't let her see/hold her grandchildren. Plus, when Tom mistreats her, or abuses her, worse yet, she'll try to call Jack, and beg him to take her in, only, to find out that he doesn't have a phone number or any social media accounts, she'll also beg Alyssa to take her in, only, to find out that she moved to another state: e.g.: California or Illinois.⚠️
The mothers the real pos here
she is a pos, the kid is too, there's no way you can see what he did and not think of him as a demon spawn
Story 1, I think OP just skipped everything she did wrong except admitting that she was "harsh in the divorce", the son probably blames OP and Tom for going away from his father and it doesn't seem they did truly try to change that. And knowing that it was his dad's money they were using for their own things and not just on him probably irritated him. The car they brought for him seems like it was from the money Dan sent.
Atleast the son is keeping in contact with the step sister
BTW not saying he wasnt AH for that prank, he sure was. But I think 800dollars is enough to skew someone's morals especially towards end of highschool. As long as that was the worst thing he ever did he isn't that bad off.
We’re not getting the whole story from this lady
Yeah and even if we were she went way to far with the pushiment. What he did was obviously F'ed up but giving his car to his half or step sister when it's obvious he doesn't like Tom just reinforces his insecurities and I would argue cancelling his birthday was too far. Now making him give the 800 to the autistic girl was very smart. 100% behind that part
Notice how the longer the story goes on, it becomes less about the stupid prank the son pulled, and more about the breakdown of OP's original marriage with her ex-husband and how she did not treat him well toward the end. She talks about how the ex-husband is calculating and plays the long game, but why would he not? It sounds like OP screwed the guy over and this excessive punishment toward their son was the final straw.
god i hope that son sues the mom. then will not only have to pay all court fees but also she will be payingmore than double what she owes due to the lawsuit, abuse, pain and suffering, neglect, wrongful inprisonment in a domicial, there is more too but lawyers will go to town on her. she would be looking at paying at least 20k
Wow. That first story. Yeah, the kid was an asshole, sure, but it sounds like he did the prank just for the money, rather than because he hates autistic people. Still a really shitty thing to do, but he probably wouldn't have done it if his mother didn't spend his child support money paying the mortgage for her fancy house rather than spending it on her actual child. Even at the end, it's pretty clear his mother cares less about her child than she does about "losing" to her ex.
So he shouldn't have the money he was complaining that OP gave to the victim. Easy. He might not hate autistic people, but that wasn't even that much cash to do it over considering the rich dad waiting in the wings to swoop in the second the son was legally able to leave mom's custody. He still chose to do it, with a LOT of time to choose to do the right thing and stop before it happened.
Mom might be a scumbag about the child support, but the punishment was fully justified.
@@FullMoonOctober No it wasn't justified whatsoever as it was in fact theft. A prank does not warrant illegal action so get off the high horse. The son is an ass for sure for the prank, but for him in high school that was plenty of money. Also your weird argument saying it wasn't much thanks to his father, that's kind of the problem lol OP was taking all his cs money for herself, her new deadbeat husband, and her stepdaughter. The only justifiable punishments were the grounding and the apology. Taking all his belongings mostly paid for by his cs, as well as money she had absolutely 0 claim in since it was given to him outside of the family is ridiculous. The car was just to add insult to injury, and even better that she admitted most of the finances are taken care of by the ex lol meaning that car was also mostly paid for by, yet again, his cs.
@@demontaco4116 Autistic people count as a protected class. Meanijg this fits the description of a hate crime. People don't get to keep money made during the commission of a crime, typically.
"I punished him so hard because he's normally a good kid."
Usually the legal system doesn't throw the book at first offenders. And he's not a kid. He's an adult.
Story 1: I remember this story. At first, I was on the mom's side until the part about her punishment. Also, the fact that she calls the step-daughter the son's half-sister is kinda telling.
If a punishment is not on a similar scale, it's not a good punishment.
Yeah, Dan and Jack ain’t no saints, but the more OP revealed about herself, it’s clear she’s just reaping what she’s sown.
Admits she was a bad wife, deliberately made custody hard, has obvious anger issues, tried forcing a relationship with her wannabe tough guy husband, the list goes on.
So the punishment was over the top to the point she legally STOLE from her son and she wouldn't return THE STOLEN MONEY NOW WHINING ABOUT LOSING HER SON. As the ex said, you chose anger over ya family TWICE now you done lost ya dam house and still have a freeloading disabled what with ya only saving grace is the step daughter who is affected by her step mom's behavior and stupidity as well now! Poor son and step daughter not caring bout these petty parents
Story 2: I remembered reading this story, and out of everything, everyone seemed oddly fixated on OP's finances and even called the story fake because "how could she afford to close on a house with just cash?" I just thought it was wild THAT'S what everyone seemed so oddly fixated on, not the disrespectful children, not the husband that openly admitted to still being in love with his ex and allowing his kids to disrespect his new wife so his ex would stay around longer. Nope, it's her finances they want to latch on to.
Especially when she said "I stayed in a unit at ONE of my rental properties". She obviously has resources.
Wow,she's doubling down on her bullshit. 9:59 Arrogance and indignation is a helluva drug. She lost her son behind a nuclear punishment.
His mother was a problem
Use child support for her new family then expect son to give them respect 😂😂
Everything she have given by her ex wow
How can she expect son to have relationships with her
Now sell your house pay child support lost only son
For story 1 wonder how OP spent the child support money, pretty sure she also spent it on her luxuries
I bet she took the money and spent it for herself or Tom and didn’t give it to the autistic girl. Why else wouldn’t she give it back if it means Jack would “come home” and get the child support back?
@@l0ngstah i don't think Jack would "come home" since he's going to Temple University in Philadelphia, i think the $800 was to reopen a relationship
All the first person had to do was ground him for a week and give the money to the girl he pranked. Now she screwed 🤣🤣
Precisely!!! How hard would that be. She just went off because he shut his stepfather down.
So she spends her son child support checks on the mortgage for a house her new husband lives in.
OP in stort 1 really not telling the whole story here .
Like why did she divorce her husband and how much she screwed him over in divorce and what is the reason her Ex hate her and why is she funding the life of her now husband and stepdaughter from the child supprot money????
I think this lady is much more shady then she seems here.
I hope her son or Ex husband find this post and answer a few questions for us.
You know it's a shame when OP treats her ex like the problem, but really she was the problem. The fact that she's more worried about the money over her own son is sickening. Like her ex said he didn't need to embarrass her, she did that all herself
Definitely the best reddit story I’ve seen. Dan and Jack are massive Chads, and I watch with glee and a warm, fuzzy feeling in my heart as OP suffers the consequences of being a scumbag.
Second story: sins must be punished, those pricks learned that the hard way
Damn it seems like Dan is just trying to make up for the lost time with his son
Dan seems to have been demonized to hell and back ''he is a bad guy!'' yet he tried to make his son forgive his mother, even when she didnt deserve it
S1: ESH all around. No one deserves any closure or happiness in that scenario.
That was a very nasty prank, but the punishment was far too severe. An apology letter? Fine. Punishment? Fine. Screaming until your throat is sore? Letting your husband scream until his throat is sore? Very bad parenting.
A good parent would have waited to calm down, then had a conversation with Jack about why he did this and why he thought it was acceptable, then discussed why this goes against the values Jack normally holds.
Between the extreme punishment, and OP spending her child support on herself and her “new family”, I’m not surprised Jack went no-contact.
story 1 ESH story 2 there is no excuse for them disrespecting her she should leave
why say esh then? when op didn't do anything wrong
@@HeoBaby24OP was an absolute terrible person in story 1 😂 Jack did wrong with the prank but the mom has been terrible her kids whole life.
@@ChefRye1 i read his comment wrong. i thought he said esh for story 2
but yes op is the ahole 1000x over fuckin easy jack was wrong for the prank but people are just ignoring what she did
S2
Yes 16 year olds are not adults, something most adults wants them to be, while still expecting them to act like kids
BUT
To be 16 and NOT understanding what they were doing, that's a whoollee 'nother matter
From toddlers we are taught accountability for things we've done wrong, if it's been explained to us many times why they are wrong.. we are given consequences
Everyone makes mistakes, young and old, but this was a not a mistake on the childrens' part, not even teen rebellion
It was deliberate, and was getting into spiteful territory
And OP's husband bollocks seemed to have been thrown away along with the childrens' birth sac
No to having children
yep
There is so much wrong with the first one. On the lady’s end, she knowingly took her ex to the cleaners, took his son, has likely been receiving high amounts in child support which has probably been misappropriated to things like her mortgage, and basically pushed too far with her punishments. She admits to making the divorce a nightmare and that it wasn’t right, but hasn’t ever bothered to go back to court and set it right because it’s beneficial to her.
On the other hand, why is the father weaponizing his son? He’s clearly been spoon feeding him this stuff to sass the step dad and get back at mom, which is entirely inappropriate. He also has no context for what the son got in trouble for, so why is he bailing him out so readily? Just to spite the mother? Is he dealing out any kind of punishments for this behavior?
Both of this kid’s parents are total, manipulative POS’, and the kid is likely on the way to becoming the same way. They are the exact kinds of spiteful, opportunistic people who have gamed the system into the shit show it is now.
For some clarification, spite can be a powerful motivator, but you need to know how to appropriately use it. If there are people who have slighted me, I work to better myself and become happier to spite them, not waste my time bringing the other person down. These people just want to stick it to each other, regardless of who they hurt. It’s sickening.
"Tom has dialed things down to what he would normally do" An abuser and a coward to boot, what a catch.
At least we know where the child support money was really going. And it was not to the child
Trying to figure out how people can defend OP, who through her own admission was a POS WIFE and MOTHER. The father legit had a reason to hate her. She didn't treat Dan good in their marriage, so why would he do anything for her? I got the prank was bad, but all those punishments at one time were way overboard. Taking the money was one thing, and grounding was enough, but taking his car away and taking the money was just unnecessary. She was operating out of rage, which a lot of people do. Now she's reaping what she sowed. There was no way Jack wasn't gonna get her back for that. She had to know she was gonna get some serious karma.
Woman dosnt like it when unfair court system is used against her? Dam im so sympathetic
“The most dangerous neighborhood in NYC” 😂😂 as a city boy - thanks for the laugh
Oh lord pet loser indeed 🤦🏻♀️ am I the only one who thinks that OP highly suspect
Day in and day out, I see stories online and in real life for why you should not "Step Up" and be a step father. Saying this as a guy who had a selfless step father, whose mother used his 401k to start a restaurant, which failed. And then later divorced him.
I agree. I was a step mum and the kid grew up to just poop all over me. Bottom line, I was nothing more but someone to use.
Stick to your guns and never make this mistake!
Story 1: she's lying or blind. Children don't leave their parents over a single incident like this. It's years of treating them badly and ignoring their attempts to fix it that causes no. The single event that she's blaming was merely the culmination of years of mistreatment. Her son will return one day. If she doesn't change by then, he will be lost to her forever.
Narcissism is blinding.
Story one she seem to revel in her opportunity to finally truly be able to punish her male son for doing anything. I’m hope he never speaks to her again it’s obvious she spent years keeping him away from his father for petty bullshit.
S1: She tried so much to make Dan the villain where all he wanted was his son and to prove that she would pick herself over her own son, You Snooze, You Lose.
If you can't control your anger it will control you! That's what happened here, over and over again.
First story - The son needed to have consequences for that prank but o understand why he was upset about the car, since the child support payments made it possible.
OP needs to accept that she taught her son how to treat people. He saw his mother treating the person who she was supposed to love, horribly. She disregarded her first husband's feelings during their marriage and her son's feelings during her next relationship and subsequent marriage so of course he doesn't care for strangers. He's a smart kid and realized that the child support was supplementing her income and maintaining her second husband and his daughter instead of being used to support him. Why was she expecting to use the child support money for her mortgage when she should have been planning to send it to her son for support while he is away from home in college?
She is the reason why her son does not respect her so she needs to stop blaming the dad, sell that house and live within her own means.
First story: I wonder how much doing the prank was a calculated move more than just peer pressure. The mother certainly ain't winning any parent awards where she took the child away for the money and, by the look of it, didn't treat him fairly over the years. By her own admission, he has been a good boy generally speaking. Yet, from saying no to the prank, he suddenly decides to go with such prank? I don't buy it. Did the dad had a part on alienating her? Yes, though she alienated herself in the first place. He saw the opportunity and took it. What the kid did is not commendable, but everyone has a tipping point, so I can see why he did that.
Yeah, ESH, anyone trying to excuse any of them needs to touch grass.
What Jack did was terrible, but the mother was ridiculous too. Her son is old enough to cut her out and move on, and she never thought of that? She stole his money and his car, did not let him see his girlfriend for a month and cancelled his birthday, and didn't expect any push back? She says she would do anything to get him back, but actually isn't? her pride is too important for that as she said she didn't cuz she didn't like the way they presented themselves? She moved Tom in when he was still basically a stranger to her kid, and he comes in trying to tell him what to do because he's an old dude from Texas? What the kid did was terrible, but not surprised he dipped with all this and much more
1st story. It sounds like mama isn't upset that she lost a son. But of losing her cash cow. New husband seems like a joke that really wanted to have son hit him to get victim status
Story 1; she truly chose her indignation. She even said at the end, she is so angry. ...
Totally her fault, and she will probably still choose her indignation a 3rd time years down the line again
Jack has been taught that it’s perfectly okay to treat others disrespectfully his whole life and then humiliate someone with special needs and whoever deals out repercussions is the bad guy.
I don’t condone that really messed up Prank the kid pulled, but if he’s normally a pretty good guy like you said, then something has to be going on(not that it excuses him by any means). And I don’t think that it could come just from him being kinda spoiled
How could he be spoiled if the CS money was being used to house 3 moochers?
Story 1: Everybody is awful except for the girl who was pranked.
Ex husband doesn't seem to be a awful person, op is leaving too many details out to make herself look better.
I want OP's ex side of the story tbh
"Hey reddit, I've been an AH to my son and my ex. AITAH?"
Story 1: OOP's son got two rotten parents. Also; engagement ring at 18? That kid is set for failure.
Technically jack could sue for the car too since it's a gift. Parents have the right to withhold gifts from kids for bad choices. But it is still considered their property. So anything taken has to be returned at the legal age of an adult. That gives parents no right to destroy, sell, give said object away
OP living off child support reminds me of my mom
Jack's prank was horrible and deserved a consequence, but I think OP's response was overkill. I agree with grounding him, and making him give the $800 to the date he treated badly. Giving his car to his sister, and cancelling his birthday, not necessary after the other consequences. OP came down on Jack like a ton of bricks. It's little wonder she lost her son.
As for Tom, he failed to realize as a step-parent, he can't move in and expect to be an authority figure right away without getting resistance. Jack should have been more courteous, but so should have Tom.
OP didn't want her son to learn and grow, she wanted her son to *suffer* .
At first i was on the side of the OP of the first story, but them she showed her true colors, she is too prideful.
Sounds like the mom from story one used Jack as an atm to keep her life going. Women like this will fight tooth and nail for custody to keep the money rolling in.
This is why you don't deal with stepkids.
First story. The woman was sad because she lost child support and with that her house. Tom and his daughter were living of Jacks child support. I think i heard she was the only one that worked. But after jack left she can't pay mortgage?
Child support was originally supposed to be for the kid not to fund your extravagant lifestyle. Yes part of it is for housing but not ALL of it. The kid is a little crap for pranking an autistic kid and the gorilla suit but the punishment should've been proportionate like the taking away the $800 and apology and talking to the wrestling coach to handle the rest and the team maybe a weekend grounding would've been fine, but this was just FAFO. OP is a piece of crap.
My dad sounds like that mother. When he told me that he would break up with his girlfriend who he had my little sister with, essentially guilt tripping me if i movedd away for a job opportunity. So when i stayed and she kicked me out a few months later he did a whole lot of nothing. So now i was without a job and without a place to live. I havent forgiven him for it even though he doesnt realise it, and i probably never will. Ill keep in touch until my little sister is old enough to keep in touch by herself and then he will never see me or his future grandchildren ever again. That man has only sabotaged me, tried to sabotage my education, multiple times tried to sabotage my career and has demanded i become homeless multiple times because he wanted me to stay in the city i lived in even though i couldn't afford it (because he sabotaged my career more then once) but he also did not have the space to give me a place to live. I still moved away in the end and am much happier for it.
if you cant live without the child support WHITHOUT THE CHILD LIVING WITH YOU the amount was unfair to begin with and you never deserved it
Op in the 1st story doesn't care about her son only want him back because he is her income source 😂 she is above evil
You can punish him and make him apologize for his wrong actions make him realize it was not okay! Maybe even giving her the 800. But however after all that she continued to punish him and going way over bored to where the point is now lost. It seems his mom is now just trying to make his life miserable which will teach him nothing! She is also wayyy to dependent on the ex husbands child support which that should only be used for the child. If you need child support to afford a fancy home then you should get a job and work yourself 🙄 his mom is absolutely out of line and seems vindictive than trying to teach a lesson. There’s ways you go about it and she just went way too far with it! Pshh don’t even get me started on how she lets her new husband mistreat her son and seems to only care to use child support for her own benefits not her son
Story 1: OP is TA, but also ESH. Here’s what you could do as a solution:
1: The son has to admit that what he did to that autistic girl was wrong and that he did deserve a punishment (not the one he got, but a punishment nonetheless). He has to publicly apologize to her for that. For everything else to happen, he has to do this first.
2: All items taken from the son as punishment must be returned or an equivalent financial value must be paid to the son. Since the son already said that the stepdaughter can keep the car, its current value will be paid to OP’s son instead of returning the car.
3: OP, her ex-husband, and her son are required to attend family therapy for at least two years. This can be done online to accommodate the fact that OP lives in Texas. OP’s ex-husband will cover this because he can afford it.
4: OP is allowed to attend her son’s wedding, but will not be involved in anything. She must receive approval from the bride and groom regarding her dress (she might be one of those people who wears a white dress at a wedding, idk). She is also not allowed to bring her husband.
5: OP cannot force her son to interact with her husband. She also cannot force her son to be civil around him.
Will they accept it? No. I think everyone here is too far gone.
OP took it too far first and was a bad parent before this point. She lost the right to set terms.
At this point, even if she changes her mind and gives the $800 back, her son will probably say "It's too late".
While the prank was not ok, the punishment was worse. You know, there's this whole thing. it's called "Making the punishment fit the crime" and guess what? This doesn't fit the crime. So yeah, OP's the A-hole here. You DID lose your son, and chances are, you are never getting him back. Not just because Dan won't let you, but because Jack won't willingly come back. Not after all of that. I don't feel bad for OP here. You reap what you sow, and she sowed the seeds of her own doom with this. She let anger control her, she cared more about her indignation and pride, and Dan was right. She'd choose her indignation every single time.
In my opinion, the boy could have learned a lesson and made amends in a vastly different way. The severe punishment was not the way to go at all.
Trying to get him to understand how he much he may have hurt the girl, get him to genuinely apologize, and even give her the money, may have gone a long way toward rehabilitating his character and making everything right.
The mother ruined it for herself.