Conquest - The Cinema Snob
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ส.ค. 2024
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Website: www.thecinemasn...
Twitter: @thecinemasnob
Writer and Creator: Brad Jones
Illustration: Shaun Millington
Theme Song: Sad Panda
End Stinger: The ToonWerks
The Cinema Snob concludes Fulcuary by reviewing Conquest. - ภาพยนตร์และแอนิเมชัน
this is unironically one of my favorite movies. the ending scene with the magic bow is pure unfiltered kino of the highest quality.
Mace Windu showering in Qui-Gon's ashes... well there's an image I never thought I'd imagine.
Thank-you Snob for always making a bad day better. You are bloody brilliant !!!...
We all get a Brad jones some times. (self-facepalm)
Cheers to that.
Bushwhacked!
Kyle Towers That's the wackiest thing I ever hoid.
I got more of a bronze age vibe than a medieval one from this film
I kind of like the look of this movie. I wish Masters of the Universe would have used its limited budget in this way instead of how they went.
I know
Stay in Eternia damn it!
It’s overdone to the point where it’s hard to figure out what’s going on.
I love recognising alll the references he makes!
Snob's references are like a game of Where's Waldo. A viewer should get a chocolate orange for every reference they understand. (I got the Lady Hawk one.)
I liked the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy reference when talking about the dolphins :-)
liquidpig yeah that one was my fav too cuz that's one of my favourite books!
its like a lotto game.
Snob taught me in Dolemite that I should do a shot every time you get a reference... Or you see a mic
Even after watching Snob for many years, I'm not sure what the hell I just watched here.
Brad.
Thank you for all the reviews you do.
And the Cinema Snob reviews.
You made a sad old widower be able to laugh again.
That means a lot to me sir
"Oh it doesn't matter. Satan's dead!"
You can't kill Satan that easily! You're gonna have to wait another 10 years before Carman shoots him with magic bullets!
oh my god he really did conquest.... thank you, Brad
"Wait." "It's not a homeless man." Dude, you are in top form for this one. I almost cried when I heard "Santa Grizzly Adams". You reached waaay back for that reference, but so worth the laugh. LOVE THIS REVIEW!
The homeless man reminded me of Michael Palin as the "IT'S..." guy in Monty Python's Flying Circus.
that wasn't a fog, snoop dogg & Willie Nelson were on the set of the movie
mr. Wldasoldmysoul4pussyasateen that's funny I didn't even see that 1
The main villain spends the movie naked with a snake draped over her?
I have to buy this
this is appealing to my very specific fetish
Don't forget that her king is a goddamn dog!
It does sound promising.
Even that's fucked up after her mask is destroyed; she turns into 'Jason takes Manhattan' and then a wolf. Stephen King's movies make more sense than that one scene, and he was HIGH
From the clips shown, I saw no eyeball mutilations. How can I be sure that this is a Fulci movie if there is no eyeball mutilations?
Kemal Alis
I believe there IS eyeball mutilations in this movie.
this movie is an eye mutilation
haha, good one.
A woman was split in half lol it’s him
19:32 "I won't scatter your sorrow to the heartless sea. I will always be with you. Plant your roots in me."
Never stop being awesome, Brad!
well i didnt know that lucio fulci direct a dark souls movie before dark souls video game
You had me at cave-people murder sex
The Bible Reloaded A video from you and Brad in the same day? Best Monday in weeks.
ikr
Any chance of getting Snob for a Chic Tract? It needs to happen.
The Bible Reloaded *Here's a TH-cam comment with Hugo and Jake.*
Dan M
This. This. THIS!
This is Conquest without Siro: THE GREATEST MORTAL KOMBAT KHARACTER EVER!
0/10 Snob, needs more Siro.
(Crumples up piece of paper) That's it!
Fucking Genius!
Now, where are those vampirates?
CWDTrixie Mace calls everything his friend? Looks like he won't be haunting people on Facebook!
THAT'S IT!
maybe its time for a new Cinema Brad, Lupa, Phelous and The Movies?
Yes?
Please?
a fulchi Film I've never seen or heard off, wow, thank you snobs/Brad,
And I thought Yor, the Hunter from the Future (1983) was unpredictable...
Great end to Fulcuary! Italy has given us some of the craziest filmmakers the world will ever see, but Lucio Fulci is definitely in the top five. So many fun films!
And lastly... I should probably know better by now to not eat lunch while watching the Cinema Snob...
P.S... What's the story behind "Game Snob"?
"Whether it's the swamp or the gates of hell..."
so are you saying these are...SWAMP ZOMBIES!!! ?
7 years. I waited 7 years to watch this because I hadn't seen the movie. I watched both the movie and the episode today. Worth it...totally worth it...
Best part is the music and atmosphere in this one. Pretty good gore too.
My idea for the next Patreon Poll: animated cat movies. Fritz the Cat, Felidae or Gay Purr-ee.
and #4, Windy City.
even if you did a pull that was 1 windy city 2 windy city 3 windy city and 4 something else it wound still not win
Don't forget Felix the Cat: The Movie.
Jean Tom? I haven't heard that name in years.
Man, Windy City must really blow.
lol!!! Game Snob!! me and my buddy discovered this place a couple of months ago we came out of a Filipino food restaurant. we immediately burst out laughing because we recognized the image. The irony is that the guy inside didn't even seem like he was all that into games let alone a snob but hilarious!
"My enemies call me Mace." "What about your friends?" "I have no friends." "Then shouldn't I be dead right no-*HHRRRK*"
Well. This was how I wanted to start my day. The most metal fantasy movie ever made.
lost my shit with the simon's quest walkthrough reference :) so true ^^
I didn't like "Conquest" when I first saw it, probably because I was still new to Italian Horror cinema and wasn't used to its...um, eccentric side. But after seeing this review, I kind of want to own this movie now.
I wrote the chapter on this film in our new book CINEMA AND SORCERY! IMHO, the WORST film we covered in the book! And what a timely addition to the end of the video, as well! :)
20:20 As random as this movie can be, there is an in-story reason for why Ocron transforms into a wolf when she dies. Partway through the film, Ocron offers her soul _and her body_ to Zora in exchange for him killing Ilias. Since the lord of evil's true form is a wolf (11:50), he changes her to something that is more his type when it's time to collect on the offer. He also abandons her during the final battle to ensure that she gets killed. Which is kind of clever because was only obligated to kill Ilias, not Mace.
The idea of someone inviting their own demise because they tried to escape destiny is a tale as old as time, but the story of a woman inadvertently condemning herself to become a wolf's mate after death is certainly a new one.
Great episode once again, Brad. The after credits scene was hilarious.
Whenever a Latin people try their hand at fantasy or fairy tales, we end up with something amazing in it's insanity.
the subscription system worked. it's a miracle!
What? Does the subscription system not usually work?
It's a TH-cam glitch.... probably over-reported from my experience with it.
Huh. Never heard of that before. That's a particularly terrible glitch.
I've not noticed it very much. I just look at the sidebar and see if someone posted anything new
people keep saying the intro is too long but I think it's such a bop
I have a great fondness for B- Softcore fantasy adventure films like this and many others. It could be because I was conceived while one was playing and I also grew up watching the Spanish dub of many of them.
I *SERIOUSLY* need a full extended version of that theme song. I'd set that bastard as my ringtone
Didn't think I would see that movie again, I remember that one back in the 80's when I was kid. Like Hercules I'm glad that such crazy B movies from that decade are getting some exposure.
Snob is the GOAT of thumbnails.
I thought he would review Nightmare on Elm Street 3 due to it being the 30th anniversary today
I was hoping for it too. Maybe it's later on in the week or somewhere down the line.
14:14 "Clean and clear and under contr--HOLY MERCIFUL HELL!!!"
Is it just me but this movie seems good?
I don't know if I would got hat far but it does look like it would be fun. I have to go find it.
Not as much as you'd like to think. I've seen it and Brad's not kidding, it's confusing as hell!
Yeah, it does seem like something would break the WTF meter pretty early in it's run. :)
It has his moments and sure its entertaining to the least.
As a coincidence, this DVD is lying right in front of me as I watch this.
Awesome, thank you Mr. Snob!
Keep rocking!
lol i live in san antonio and saw that store and immediately thought, huh, that looks like the cinema snob.
Otaku Skateboarding so did I! it's so close in comparison that there's no way he wasn't the inspiration somehow for that sign
the owner inside looks nothing like the sign
It's definitely me. The picture is from some artwork Patrick Rodriguez did of me in 2010.
Well send in the lawyers! Because with his prices....
Yep, living not that far away from Game Snob, my friend and I thought the exact same thing
I love how the 2011 clip is from the banned episode.
...Gods. I just now realized how long I've been following the Cienama SNob...
I can't believe how much time has passed since I first found your reviews. Almost ten years now and still going.
All praise the god of Raisin Bran! Two Scoops.... Two Scoops.... Two Scoops!
Holy shit, the TH-cam notification system is actually working for once. What is this sorcery?
Koen Van Damme mine didn't work. 😒
The God of Raisin Bran has shined on you, my son. Let his two scoops of enlightenment guide you
JamEs unDerhI I accept His fibrey goodness.
Such a bow would be pretty badass if gifted to say ... Green Arrow, or Hawkeye. Even a Stark made version, that fires proton bolts or something would be awesome.
I would say too soon on the outro but good for you. hilarious after credits ending.
alright, i'm apparently completely out of the loop
what was too soon?
The bit with the envelope at the end. They got the wrong one at the Oscars so the people from La La Land were accepting for Best Picture when they found out Moonlight actually won and had to hand them back.
Monday's are always hard, some more than others, thanks for being the sunshine to dreary days. Greetings from Florida
Good god, it is like watching a movie on a broken monitor.
Why is it so dark and murky?
He doesn't know where he's going...just where the Simon's Quest walkthrough tells him ha ha. 16:07 in and I' m still waiting for the piano riff from The Beyond to start up again
And the Oscar goes to CONQUEST!,.....Oh sorry there seem to have been a mistake.
Look like we made it!!!
I would LOVE to make a Legend of Zelda fake trailer in style of this movie like we did with our 80's revenge trailer version of Paperboy
the new intro song reminds me of Wesley Willis. I swear that the person who wrote that listened to Rock and Roll MacDonalds over and over again. great episode brad.
"No...wait...It's not a homeless man."
Brad is the 'Batman' of youtube movie critics
Thank God that Conquest won. I voted for it so that I wouldn't get spoiled on The Black Cat.
(after watching outro)
Okay, unless it's a weirdly timed joke referencing the Oscars, does that mean Black Cat is next week? If so, damn it!
I love 80s European fantasy movies. They're so nonsensical, so unnecessarily erotic and yet so fun and often creative.
Wow, who knew Lucio Fulci could direct a "Conan:The Barbarian" style fantasy movie. I think I saw a clip of this movie in James Rolfe's "Deathstalker" review. Like many of Fulci's movies, it has the traditional blood and gore, only with no eye gouging this time. Also having a female villain who spends the movie topless and masked is nice touch. Even a nicer touch with the reference to the Oscar's debacle. Great episode and great way to end "Fulcuary".
Really love the theme song to your show Brad, and this film has some awesome music itself.
I never quite understood the weird synth in these kinds of movies. It just seems to clash with the rest of it. Well, it's art. I must be a philistine.
I'm glad he chose this one over the other one.
8:00 Oh no, he's killed the "It's....." man from the opening of Monty Python's Flying Circus!
Cue the Liberty Bell March!
IT'S....Lucio Fulci's Flying Cir-CUSSSSSSS
Message for you, sir!
"...The Black Cat won the poll."
Awww, damnit! Robbed again! Next year!
I hope so, especially with Brad being a fan of the film.
Your channel is my favorite movie review channel.
Love the knock at 'Lord Of The Rings' at the end!
I feel like after this video, the Game Snob store suddenly saw its biggest influx of customers ever
God that jingle is soooo catchy!
My favorite Fulci. Thanks for the review!
Now, this is a special occasion. An old movie on here I haven't seen. :) Now I have to find it and correct that. Oh and love the "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" reference.
Shit, I must have missed that reference. What was it?
Oh the part where the dolphins save the guy and he says "so long and thanks for all the fish".
I saw this without knowing it had anything to do with Fulci. The first exposed brain sure was an eye opener. Things went off the rails from there.
This film really needs a sequel!
This movie looks faucking great! Like some vintage d&d campaign!
Great review of an insane 80s fantasy movie few have ever heard of. I'd like to see an 8-Bit Cinema version of Conquest, it seems like it was based off of a Nintendo fantasy game!
Somehow I doubt those are medieval times this movie plays in. I mean, where are the castles and knights? *;-)*
Holy shit. "Game Snob" dropped my jaw.
The Best Elias is Lee Elia, the former Cubs manager famous for his epic rant.
Children will like this one.
I love this movie! I would love to see you take on Yor Hunter from the Future, Sword and the Sorcerer, or Hawke the Slayer!
love the new intro
I love the Cinema Snob theme, its so catchy :)
Conquest
They played it by request
It was another type of quest
Dude! i've been wanting to see this movie. Thanks for reviewing it. I'm sure its gonna be another great episode.
That sound effectof the snake getting shot kills me
He actually is the mascot for a game store! O_O
Past couple videos have been with the new intro. It's sounds so familiar, like something from a game I played. Went through Rock Band and Guitar Hero song lists. Guitar Hero 3, Lay Down by Priestess. Good choice, I like listening and playing this song.
the poster for this video was so fucking funny. as soon as I saw it. I laughed idk why.
This makes me wonder if in Breath of the Wild Link gets to shoot arrows at Wolf Soldiers and Homeless people.
They look like knockoff Wookiees.
Thanks brad
Hey! I missed the Black Boxes ^^
Also I'm surprised this doesn't have an alternative title of "Troll 4" or "Ator 4"
I feel compelled to find that game store now.
Love this movie!
The weeds shooting Arrows was originally the plot of The Happenings