For those people here who fear they cant rebuild their lives after experiencing abuse. You can do it. At age 58 I finally appreciated that my husband had many narcissistic traits that were toxic to myself. I left with nothing as my ex was an Anglican priest also supported by that institution not always moral or spiritual. I'm now aged 73. I've rebuilt my life and my journey whilst very tough indeed has been truly worth it, for my own health and wellbeing and with Gods grace and compassion I continue to heal from those destructive affects. If only those with more definitive narcissistic traits would heal too.
I commend you for your strand courage to go,,, I really do. I was seeing someone for over 20 yrs, off/on,, mostly off, who I learned was a narcissist. A very toxic relationship. But I knew so little about this! I blamed myself. He blamed me. It made me crazy. False guilt , was killing me. I’m 69, and it is over,,, was over few years ago, but then he died suddenly. I grieve, for the parts of him that were kind. But I AM FREE AT LAST, Snd it will never happen again. I know the signs now, like I know my own self. I run the other way when a man has the red flags, and Pursues me. I am shocked at how common this is. Did you have any idea? I would appreciate to know what you know.
Never mind the narc... they will not change if they are a true narc....period. Don't feel anything for them as in doing that you are supplying them with supply... this is EXTREMELY spiritual thing❗🐍
I was like.."What's up with the heavy looking jacket and beard? Oh, yes...It's winter in Australia." Hard to imagine it for me since I literally just got out of the city pool in Wisconsin...LOL!
I single female 68 have realized I tend to be empathic and I am very word sensitive meaning I hear what is said and NOT said. I have had a lot of people hurt me disrespect me try to use and take advantage of me and once I realize this I find I don't get angry but I am very hurt and I become VERY cautious and withdraw from people. This has happened to the point I am pretty much now not a loner but a hermit. Have I become this way or do empaths tend to have enlarged egos and or narcisses tendenances. Would enjoy to have a true friend but have never in my life been able to find that. So glad your back. Your wisdom is so valuable, blessing to you and yours. v
There are other empaths out there with good, pure hearts that you just might run into. I am fortunate enough to work in a retail store, so I find many a good people come and go, young and old in this Job. I get to form great relationships and casual encounters. I here stories from all walks of life with coworkers/customers and personalities from all walks. I am Christian and I can't live with myself being a hermit or a recluse. I have to let my light shine as Jesus said. I am reserved by nature but a super empathetic person. I am 37 and love to chat it up with many a younger generation at work also. I've ran into a Narcissist boss that God led me into to help test my patience, self-control and faith. She wounded me and broken my heart many a times in the 1 yr I worked for her. Well I treated her with respect and honesty and I have become a stronger and more knowledgeable person because of this experience in working under her. In short I passed the test God led me into and now a yr later I have a new wonderful boss.
Don't give up on finding a friend my sister empath. Things happen when you least expect. I can say this, make sure someone is worthy of your trust b4 letting them in your life. Pay attention to how you feel after being around those who you may consider as possible friends. (If something feels wrong it is wrong) be wise as a serpent and innocent as a lamb.♥️
Reading what your comment says, is like reading my own story. I am a near-hermit. People have disregarded me, used me, thrown me away, after I showed my empathy and kindness. I still pray, that God would show me, please show me, why this is.
@@stephaniepiazzese4332 ppl see the power you posses and they strive to get it... But you have to find it within yourself also! You have what the world needs my friend. Becoming a hermit may very well be what's needed to find your strength and come back whole with confidence and boundaries towards those who overstep!
It is such a refreshing change, to see a video on personality disorders that does not tell me there is no hope for wellness, or that I should cut myself off from my loved ones forever, because they have these personality traits. According to most of the "experts" on TH-cam, narcissism is increasingly common, and entirely destructive to anyone who crosses paths with a narcissist. But how can we grow Spiritually and emotionally as a collective, if these people are part of the collective, with no hope for change? I do not have the answers yet, but I am open to the quest. Looking forward to the next video.
Very good question. How... Some kind of forced intervention is a possibility. So are psyche.delic s. Or a major social trend where narcissism is taboo. You mentioned the collective consciousness. Is there a way to work with it somehow?
Other neuro psychologists are looking at the way the brain works and how the right side of the brain is where the identity centre, attachment centre and relational centre is .. Where character is built. With that in mind they recommended that one of the only hopes for a narcissist to chance is for them to be in relational community where they can be healthy corrected and still stay in relationship.. With attachment.
Kitchen Nightmareees! Thats my comfort show exactly because of what you say. Its really healing to see him shattering narcissistic delusions. There where debates I had nearly 1 to 1 with narcissists in my life. Seeing him telling them off shows me that I wasnt crazy in similar situations. Gordon Ramsay is also one of the few celebs I like. His humility, sincerity and humanity inspire me. He may seem harsh and he can be but he isnt cruel. Actually I see in his honesty a deep kindness. Its not to make people feel bad its about helping them out of their, as I call it, narcissistic cocoon.
You're amazing! I've never listened to you before. Such depth! You integrated the spiritual and psychological like no one I have heard previously! Thank you ❤
Hello Abdul great to see you again. This is such an important topic and so wise in this presentation. It's for all of us to self reflect and notice these traits that we all have in our shadow selves as Carl Jung wrote about. I appreciate all your vidios Abdul. So helpful for my own work with people. Heleena
We have missed you! Glad to see you again, Dr. This segment was great! I have watched many of the Kitchen Nightmare shows. Now they are even more intriguing with this understanding!
I once knew a guitarist who flew into a vicious rage for many many days because a fellow musician of his told him that he was (merely) “a good guitarist”. I heard this guitarist actually say “I am one of the greatest guitarists in the world’ even though no one has ever heard of him outside of New South Wales. This is a stark example of hidden grandiosity .
I hope that you can someday make a video on anger, people who get angry easily and/or emotional regulation. I have been struggling with that my entire life.
I’m so sorry.. I know you weren’t asking me, but Have you tried inner child work? Or somatic therapy? That could help greatly moving stored anger and trauma out of the body. In adult life when we feel hurt or let down by others the ego and negative core beliefs from childhood are activated and triggered. We begin to relive the old pain. Hence the disproportional anger reaction. When we’re triggered quickly into anger we are out of our body living in the past. Try dropping into your body. Breathing into the trigger. Be with your inner child… go back to when you first felt the sensation.. the deeper emotion or feeling that’s behind the anger (whether it’s feeling unseen, unheard, unloveable, etc.) Give yourself that patience, presence and nurturing that you wished you’d gotten from others.. Vs. acting out on your childhood trauma and triggers and then regretting it. 🤍🤍🤍
Ask yourself why you get angry. It's the only way. If you avoid to deal with it it means you're rejecting something which your pride can't deal with. Only humbleness can help you. Ask God for help
I hope that you don't mind me saying that your recognition of the tendency to be angered quickly is your opening to freedom from it. In my spiritual tradition...it is said that we come here (born, embodied) to learn and grow...to work out karma from the past. There are reasons that we have the challenges that we do...and healing comes with the willingness to ask God to assist you in surrendering this burden. All the best to you...Never give up. Anger is one of the passions of the mind. Love is the antidote to fear and anger...the heart rather than the head, ("head"meaning the mind.) The mind is a computer...and necessary and useful...But you, as embodied Soul...are called to be the master of yourself. Russell Brand (on Facebook, TH-cam,) is wordy but VERY kind and teaches breathing exercises to help us let go of negative emotions.
I appreciate your kind advice very much. I have tried inner child work and shadow work as well. And I have seen major improvements but I am still bothered by a few things and I am honestly afraid I may damage my relationships with friends and family because they may think that I have put on a persona and I haven't really changed.
Also, I am an empath and during arguments with anyone, the angrier they get, the more I do too since I basically absorb their energy. It is almost ridiculous.
Dear Saad. This series shows your personal transformation and transcendence as a clinical psychologist and person as well. I have learnt so much. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
I was blessed to see your Part 1. I appreciate your spiritual side. 🙏🧠🙏 The spirit of JEZABEL has devoured my whole family. The enormous weight on me has lifted a lot but my fear of even being around humans has taken over. Dad died last July & Mom went on with another man. Living in my motorhome & I've became a hermit. Almost 50 & I'm scared to death that I don't have time to build a life that I've never known.
I wanted to add that I know the spirit of JEZABEL is inside & those it's not inside , everyone close are under the weight of the dark spirit or floating on the clouds praising the one consumed by it.
I'm so sorry😢 You can do let no one stop you! I been through narcissist abuse myself... I use to be scared also. Take your life back! Don't let fear stop you thts the devils plan. U can go live a life u never had. Don't let go of your faith❤❤
What we want & what we are capable of, are two different things. Acceptance of personal circumstances financal, etc. Including emotional, psychological, and physical limitations is the most important factor in personal satisfaction. I too live in an RV. I am 59, have a chronic illness and I am content! I choose, to maintain my attention on present moment & "current" daily life. Living a quiet simple life is my blessing.👍💛
Thank yall. This is month 6 for me without a family anymore. It's been excruciatingly painful but my faith is strong & I know without opening doors too suddenly, my discernment with strangers will get more in tune. I appreciate yall
Thank you. You educate without condemnation. You provide hope for healing. So many "experts " on youtube are demeaning, mocking and vilifying. Accepting that there is a spectrum of narcissism is important. We need to grow as a collective. We are all human, have faults, contribute to our own suffering and our own healing. We also have a responsibility to one another, to be civil, to see our similarities rather than our differences. Your kindness and wisdom come through. Again, thank you.
Becoming more real, keeping it real! Amen to that! And the questions, what makes us angry...down to what makes us pout, etc....wow, that is keeping it real. I love it. It's ime for a powerful journey on examining our truths in all their forms. Thank you for inspiring some deep self evaluation, and thank you for sharing you 🙏
This is simply amazing! It’s not about pointing fingers at others it’s about seeing where we fall short and where we can improve. I’m not minimizing how hard the npd must work I’m not minimizing the abuse the narcissist can render. I just believe more in the Hope that divinity can heal us IF we want to be healed. I love love love this mans take - I listen to so many views on this subject and they just demonize the narcissist - this is what is missing in all of those - hope divinity the possibility of overcoming one self by a power far greater than humans. Thank you thank you times ten for helping us “check” our selves for this threads of narcissism in ourselves. I will always be grateful for your thought .
What a beautiful series. Thank you for alll your efforts. Loving the connection back with the inner firoan/phroah and the verses of Quran youre linking your research back into. May your much needed work for our generation be received globally multifold. Amen
"Those who are not in alignment with nature/reality are in trouble." Wonderful video, thank-you for reminding us that no one is without some of these traits and to look inside for our "inner pharaoh". Refreshing and wise viewpoint, thank-you as always for your brilliant insights.
My experience is easily described as the most painful of my life without a doubt! You can't go through it without being changed! The giant was there and I accepted faith would sustain me. There is no retreat. I'm three years out but the anger sustains me still. The struggle now is the rebuilding. Have you noticed that many senior women are describing this abuse? (I'm a senior single female also)
Man- you have a gift of communicating complex (and interesting) ideas in a helpful way. “… the more shocking the reality check the more likely we have been ignoring the lighter reality checks we have been receiving.” Those “lighter reality checks” are the flaming red flags I have glibly blazed by in the past. Ha! Thank you for your content and hard work. Stay safe, Scottie
Your takes on narcissism are new, exciting, and interesting! It's nice to see someone approach mental illness multi-dimensionally (i.e looking at the complexities of this disorder, and laying out the many different ways thoughts and behaviors can manifest from this pathology) rather than most who just lay out symptoms, treatments, and red flags. Your return to youtube is highly appreciated!
1) I wish you would explain more fully what "the psyche fragments more easily" means. What normally holds the psyche together? 2) As a Catholic, I agree 100% with your observation that modern "horizontal" cultures are narcissistic.
I really appreciate you + your offerings. I love that you focus on self-reflection, self-awareness, and personal spiritual applications. The context you provide as well as the understanding of the spectrum of narcissistic/borderline/codependent expressions is very helpful. Thank you for this thoughtful + balanced perspective. Sending you lots of Love 💚💙💚
Dr Abdul this is so brilliant looking at the narcissism within all of humanity. I know the “blunt instrument “ is truth and I cannot shy away from it when dealing with my personal growthThankyou 💐
Loving this series...I have a Buddhist meditation practice which helps ground/stabilise me and in developing qualities of love and compassion, but in everyday life when I'm triggered, the reactivity of my narcissist traits is turbo charged and burns up spiritual progress.... the terrorist is flying the plane and it's so hard to find a way back to basic sanity! All your advice and insights are very much appreciated and I look forward to more teachings 😁
So good to have you back. Thank you for enabling my new level of peaceful, uplifted understanding of self and others at that invaluable spiritual level. Love and appreciate your wisdom. 🙏💜🍀
Thank you for your perspective on self hate or faults. I am guilty of this to a greater extent than I wish to acknowledge; however, your words bring me comfort as I work through this trait. Dr. Saad, thank you for videos and channel because this channel makes the viewer search within themselves for a better personal future.
I am so relieved to find someone addressing these issues from a more spiritual perspective. “What triggers my narcissism.” Now that is a useful question. I’m so grateful to you for these videos. Much love to you! Going to listen to 3rd video now! 🙏🏼
Dr Saad, it is very good to have you back. I cannot express how happy I am .. it's a pleasure to listen and learn from your lectures. Keep them coming. Stay blessed
I agree, good to see/hear you again. It's been almost 2 years since I hit the net to understand wtf had just happened to me. You were one of first vids I watched: all I heard was "rest and digest" as a way to cope with the sudeen, incoherent trauma. I haven't stopped repeating that matra. And Voila! full circle here you are w an amazing vid that matches my new level of psycho-philosophical understanding and 75% healed-ness. Thank you, kind sir.
it amazes me that for all the pain they cause everyone else its the one thing they can't face. i can't even grasp not being able to introspect....especially when those around you are harmed...in most cases the same peope who only tried to help and care about you. i will never understand this disorder. i've been dealing with this my entire life. to choose to project and harm your own children rather than simply going for therapy is something i cant grasp when their victims endure far more pain than they carry and we have no choice BUT to deal with it and constantly. also, we have a right to be angry about abuse. i dont consider my rightful anger over being mistreated a narcissistic injury..in this case everyone then is a narcissist which isn't true. everyone has anger about something. i would consider trivial anger a problem but not anger over this form of abuse.
Abdul, Thank you. These are profound insights; they begin to peel back the layers of the spiritual nature of our personalities. Many of these truths are very hard to accept but do line up so well with reality. Your work/labor is very helpful and thank you so much for making it available to so many like me who could otherwise not afford to receive it. Blessings.
Wow. This and part 1. were food for my soul! Thank you so much for taking the time to organize and link this information. I am finally working on healing my wounds caused by a narcissistic parent who abused me since ever, and now that I too have a child I wonder often if I am displaying those traits, if I am hurting my child. This series definitely helped me to understand better how to deal with myself and understand myself a little more.
@@Puuws thank you your explanation, I see alot of me in the codep not wanting to walk away due to feeling deep guilt, that's my RC indoctrination, Christianity institutionalised guilt as a virtue. I finally got it and moved on. Thank you again for sharing your insights.
I've been suspicious I have borderline for several years and I feel more certain about it as I get older. I tried to tell my therapist, but it would have taken decades of unpacking that I felt I didn't have the energy for; he was fairly insistent I didn't have bpd or npd. My reflection on it has felt mostly therapeutic and I know relinquishing unfounded senses of control has been integral to living with that "emptiness." I am truly enjoying this intersectional study of npd. In the past 4 years I have been in 2 relationships with people with npd, one that was formally diagnosed and omitted that information, and one who was aware but undiagnosed. That experience left me feeling ego-dead and with severe panic disorder. The input of minds like your own, lots of inner child therapy, and even more music therapy I thought would help me overcome that trauma, but surprisingly to me it dug deeper and has helped my identity feel less disjointed. I feel more consistent than I have felt since early childhood and the panic attacks are almost wholely gone. When I read there was no cure for bpd I in many ways buckled down to just be this way, but to know that there were ways to soothe my inner child and build stronger connections between them the adult and the warrior has been entirely transformative. I guess I am saying I am beyond appreciative, the love is mutual. God bless.
Wow! Have not been to your channel for couple of years. Was one of the early subscribers, 20k or so if I remember correctly...... you are going deep now, I’ll have to go back and listen to all I’ve been missing.
Hi welcome back I haven't looked at or done narc research for over a year, I think this is a positive sign for my journey. I would like to see more videos on how to be able to co exist with a narc. This is because it is possible and there's lots of info of the Psyche of narcs bit not practical methods of day to day living. I say this because I saw someone who doesn't believe in the no contact and it is possible. I saw it was no communication about self to narc rather than no contact. Amazing experience
I was in such a relationship but I am now in the healing process the Lord even showed me it is a process but He will heal us.....l think though this was a journey God really protected me and walked me through....He really did preserved me....and I am so thankful to Him. Now I can help persons who going though this and help them identify the red flags before it is to late. For the latest ones I do encourage them.
My rage kicked in when my boss tried to tell me I did not have long covid symptoms, after a work colleague complained about me talking about it. 11 years of hearing his toxic opinion just poured out of me sideways and I spoke to him in the most extreme way. It was soo extreme, he was unable to see the mirror I was inadvertently holding up. He sacked me on the spot and I now understand how impacting gaslighting can be. Being told I'm wrong is fine. Being told I'm imagining things, despite my due diligence was like a volcano eruption within me.
Great lesson. Toxic people must be dealt with properly, tactically. No illusions. Unfortunately, there is SO much bad advice out there on how to do it. As you found out, ignoring the problem doesn't work...
I was able to get myself away. But my 15yr old daughter is still with both of us individually every 2nd week; we separated 3 & 1/2yrs ago, but we still have a court date at the end October /21. Were you really really starting to impact our daughter. What can I do re: My ex: it was finances & being disrespected. Mine was: my calling. my passion & being disrespected. I went from the 4 time Canadian Champion in American style rhythm and ballroom dancing when we met, getting diagnosed with MS when we got engaged and now 20 years later my MS has progressed enough that I am disabled using a walker and just about to receive my motorized wheelchair. Im know teaching people like me w/ MS or any neurological illness. A dance program called Moovin and Groovin’ for people with a disability or in a wheelchair.
Sorry. Some purposeful abuse and inflicted resentment from one's own family lasts a lifetime. All the clinical and pharmaceutical therapies can't heal the affected brain and broken heart.
Regarding Gordon Ramsay and his show: is it not true that the show itself is attractive to the narcissistic self? He is, after all, the protagonist in the drama, the person who is able to denigrate and humiliate chefs whose culinary techniques he deems inferior. Do not viewers identify with him, does he not assuage the desire to be grandiose? For me this raises the question: if the dynamics of the show are analogous to that in which the disordered narcissist finally encounters “reality”, could one not suppose that our identification with Ramsay (rather than with the precious contestants) in that encounter is a form of resistance to the inevitability of the narcissist meeting his/her match?
I believe the narcissist coworker who had me idealised demonstrates both BPD and narcissistic traits. As examples, she saw rejection when none was intended and wanted to control this so backed off with her love bombing. At the same time, although the vulnerable type, occasionally the grandiosity would appear from nowhere. She is exceptionally sensitive to criticism.
Doctor I'm sorry but you are wrong about Australia doing well; taking into consideration the large numbers of stranded Australians around the world, being denied their basic rights and all.
For those people here who fear they cant rebuild their lives after experiencing abuse. You can do it.
At age 58 I finally appreciated that my husband had many narcissistic traits that were toxic to myself. I left with nothing as my ex was an Anglican priest also supported by that institution not always moral or spiritual. I'm now aged 73. I've rebuilt my life and my journey whilst very tough indeed has been truly worth it, for my own health and wellbeing and with Gods grace and compassion I continue to heal from those destructive affects. If only those with more definitive narcissistic traits would heal too.
You give me hope trying to get away from a narcissistic
You will be valuable tool to be used by God to help others. Keep shining
I commend you for your strand courage to go,,, I really do.
I was seeing someone for over 20 yrs, off/on,, mostly off, who I learned was a narcissist.
A very toxic relationship. But I knew so little about this! I blamed myself. He blamed me. It made me crazy. False guilt , was killing me.
I’m 69, and it is over,,, was over few years ago, but then he died suddenly. I grieve, for the parts of him that were kind. But I AM FREE AT LAST, Snd it will never happen again. I know the signs now, like I know my own self. I run the other way when a man has the red flags, and Pursues me. I am shocked at how common this is. Did you have any idea? I would appreciate to know what you know.
@@BT-ok6fo thank you. This is very very helpful and I hope you keep telling it. God bless you in your freedom and new life !!
Never mind the narc... they will not change if they are a true narc....period. Don't feel anything for them as in doing that you are supplying them with supply... this is EXTREMELY spiritual thing❗🐍
Good to see youre back...you were missed
I was like.."What's up with the heavy looking jacket and beard? Oh, yes...It's winter in Australia." Hard to imagine it for me since I literally just got out of the city pool in Wisconsin...LOL!
Any one can be healed from such an abuse and only God can do it...our h spirit need healing
I single female 68 have realized I tend to be empathic and I am very word sensitive meaning I hear what is said and NOT said. I have had a lot of people hurt me disrespect me try to use and take advantage of me and once I realize this I find I don't get angry but I am very hurt and I become VERY cautious and withdraw from people. This has happened to the point I am pretty much now not a loner but a hermit. Have I become this way or do empaths tend to have enlarged egos and or narcisses tendenances. Would enjoy to have a true friend but have never in my life been able to find that. So glad your back.
Your wisdom is so valuable, blessing to you and yours.
v
You"re describing me to a T, age and all. It's like I gave up hope of ever changing at my age.
There are other empaths out there with good, pure hearts that you just might run into. I am fortunate enough to work in a retail store, so I find many a good people come and go, young and old in this Job. I get to form great relationships and casual encounters. I here stories from all walks of life with coworkers/customers and personalities from all walks. I am Christian and I can't live with myself being a hermit or a recluse. I have to let my light shine as Jesus said. I am reserved by nature but a super empathetic person. I am 37 and love to chat it up with many a younger generation at work also. I've ran into a Narcissist boss that God led me into to help test my patience, self-control and faith. She wounded me and broken my heart many a times in the 1 yr I worked for her. Well I treated her with respect and honesty and I have become a stronger and more knowledgeable person because of this experience in working under her. In short I passed the test God led me into and now a yr later I have a new wonderful boss.
Don't give up on finding a friend my sister empath. Things happen when you least expect. I can say this, make sure someone is worthy of your trust b4 letting them in your life. Pay attention to how you feel after being around those who you may consider as possible friends. (If something feels wrong it is wrong) be wise as a serpent and innocent as a lamb.♥️
Reading what your comment says, is like reading my own story. I am a near-hermit. People have disregarded me, used me, thrown me away, after I showed my empathy and kindness. I still pray, that God would show me, please show me, why this is.
@@stephaniepiazzese4332 ppl see the power you posses and they strive to get it... But you have to find it within yourself also! You have what the world needs my friend. Becoming a hermit may very well be what's needed to find your strength and come back whole with confidence and boundaries towards those who overstep!
As my late mum would say.
Soft words turn away wrath. Thank you for the information doctor.
Wow I like that .must remember next time I get upset and angry at the world.
Your mind and it’s speech are precious.
Your beard is absolutely wonderful!
It is such a refreshing change, to see a video on personality disorders that does not tell me there is no hope for wellness, or that I should cut myself off from my loved ones forever, because they have these personality traits. According to most of the "experts" on TH-cam, narcissism is increasingly common, and entirely destructive to anyone who crosses paths with a narcissist. But how can we grow Spiritually and emotionally as a collective, if these people are part of the collective, with no hope for change? I do not have the answers yet, but I am open to the quest. Looking forward to the next video.
Read Dr. George Simon In Sheep's Clothing.
Very good question. How... Some kind of forced intervention is a possibility. So are psyche.delic s. Or a major social trend where narcissism is taboo.
You mentioned the collective consciousness. Is there a way to work with it somehow?
Other neuro psychologists are looking at the way the brain works and how the right side of the brain is where the identity centre, attachment centre and relational centre is .. Where character is built. With that in mind they recommended that one of the only hopes for a narcissist to chance is for them to be in relational community where they can be healthy corrected and still stay in relationship.. With attachment.
@@KJ-lb4tj Can you provide a reference document?
@@josephineananda read any of the stuff from Dr Jim wilder... Suggestion 'the other half of church'.
need to set aside time to listen to this again in detail.
I put on closed captioning on all my learning sites helps immensely retain information ℹ️ He is one of the Best ✍🏼🙏🏻
Kitchen Nightmareees! Thats my comfort show exactly because of what you say. Its really healing to see him shattering narcissistic delusions. There where debates I had nearly 1 to 1 with narcissists in my life. Seeing him telling them off shows me that I wasnt crazy in similar situations. Gordon Ramsay is also one of the few celebs I like. His humility, sincerity and humanity inspire me. He may seem harsh and he can be but he isnt cruel. Actually I see in his honesty a deep kindness. Its not to make people feel bad its about helping them out of their, as I call it, narcissistic cocoon.
Finally a sane voice and accredited by self evident reason. Spiritual psychology in modern humanity. Now the Work begins! Thank you Brother🙏🏾
You're amazing! I've never listened to you before. Such depth! You integrated the spiritual and psychological like no one I have heard previously!
Thank you ❤
Check out his nice guy series Excellent ✍🏼
It’s so good to see you back and active! Your content is always quite excellent. Thank you for your dedication to mental health! God bless!
Hello Abdul great to see you again.
This is such an important topic and so wise in this presentation. It's for all of us to self reflect and notice these traits that we all have in our shadow selves as Carl Jung wrote about. I appreciate all your vidios Abdul. So helpful for my own work with people. Heleena
Im looking forward to this series, glad to have you back.
We have missed you! Glad to see you again, Dr. This segment was great! I have watched many of the Kitchen Nightmare shows. Now they are even more intriguing with this understanding!
Scary similarities my boss loved that show of course female version Like a demon mirror 👹
I once knew a guitarist who flew into a vicious rage for many many days because a fellow musician of his told him that he was (merely) “a good guitarist”. I heard this guitarist actually say “I am one of the greatest guitarists in the world’ even though no one has ever heard of him outside of New South Wales. This is a stark example of hidden grandiosity .
I have come a long way on my quest to understand myself and my fellow man thanks to TH-cam providers such as yourself . Much thanks Dr Saad !
I hope that you can someday make a video on anger, people who get angry easily and/or emotional regulation. I have been struggling with that my entire life.
I’m so sorry.. I know you weren’t asking me, but Have you tried inner child work? Or somatic therapy? That could help greatly moving stored anger and trauma out of the body.
In adult life when we feel hurt or let down by others the ego and negative core beliefs from childhood are activated and triggered. We begin to relive the old pain. Hence the disproportional anger reaction. When we’re triggered quickly into anger we are out of our body living in the past.
Try dropping into your body. Breathing into the trigger. Be with your inner child… go back to when you first felt the sensation.. the deeper emotion or feeling that’s behind the anger (whether it’s feeling unseen, unheard, unloveable, etc.) Give yourself that patience, presence and nurturing that you wished you’d gotten from others..
Vs. acting out on your childhood trauma and triggers and then regretting it.
🤍🤍🤍
Ask yourself why you get angry. It's the only way. If you avoid to deal with it it means you're rejecting something which your pride can't deal with. Only humbleness can help you. Ask God for help
I hope that you don't mind me saying that your recognition of the tendency to be angered quickly is your opening to freedom from it. In my spiritual tradition...it is said that we come here (born, embodied) to learn and grow...to work out karma from the past. There are reasons that we have the challenges that we do...and healing comes with the willingness to ask God to assist you in surrendering this burden. All the best to you...Never give up. Anger is one of the passions of the mind. Love is the antidote to fear and anger...the heart rather than the head, ("head"meaning the mind.) The mind is a computer...and necessary and useful...But you, as embodied Soul...are called to be the master of yourself. Russell Brand (on Facebook, TH-cam,) is wordy but VERY kind and teaches breathing exercises to help us let go of negative emotions.
I appreciate your kind advice very much. I have tried inner child work and shadow work as well. And I have seen major improvements but I am still bothered by a few things and I am honestly afraid I may damage my relationships with friends and family because they may think that I have put on a persona and I haven't really changed.
Also, I am an empath and during arguments with anyone, the angrier they get, the more I do too since I basically absorb their energy. It is almost ridiculous.
Thank you so very much. Eid Mubarak. I'm so grateful to have been guided to your channel.
Dear Saad. This series shows your personal transformation and transcendence as a clinical psychologist and person as well. I have learnt so much. Thank you for sharing your wisdom.
I was blessed to see your Part 1. I appreciate your spiritual side. 🙏🧠🙏 The spirit of JEZABEL has devoured my whole family. The enormous weight on me has lifted a lot but my fear of even being around humans has taken over. Dad died last July & Mom went on with another man. Living in my motorhome & I've became a hermit. Almost 50 & I'm scared to death that I don't have time to build a life that I've never known.
I wanted to add that I know the spirit of JEZABEL is inside & those it's not inside , everyone close are under the weight of the dark spirit or floating on the clouds praising the one consumed by it.
I'm so sorry😢 You can do let no one stop you! I been through narcissist abuse myself... I use to be scared also. Take your life back! Don't let fear stop you thts the devils plan. U can go live a life u never had. Don't let go of your faith❤❤
It’s not to late ⏰…. We see you baby, Fight
What we want & what we are capable of, are two different things. Acceptance of personal circumstances financal, etc. Including emotional, psychological, and physical limitations is the most important factor in personal satisfaction. I too live in an RV. I am 59, have a chronic illness and I am content!
I choose, to maintain my attention on present moment & "current" daily life. Living a quiet simple life is my blessing.👍💛
Thank yall. This is month 6 for me without a family anymore. It's been excruciatingly painful but my faith is strong & I know without opening doors too suddenly, my discernment with strangers will get more in tune. I appreciate yall
I’m so very grateful for your return 🙏
Thank you. You educate without condemnation. You provide hope for healing. So many "experts " on youtube are demeaning, mocking and vilifying. Accepting that there is a spectrum of narcissism is important. We need to grow as a collective. We are all human, have faults, contribute to our own suffering and our own healing. We also have a responsibility to one another, to be civil, to see our similarities rather than our differences. Your kindness and wisdom come through. Again, thank you.
"it's about keeping it real"
I felt that
Becoming more real, keeping it real! Amen to that! And the questions, what makes us angry...down to what makes us pout, etc....wow, that is keeping it real. I love it. It's ime for a powerful journey on examining our truths in all their forms. Thank you for inspiring some deep self evaluation, and thank you for sharing you 🙏
This is simply amazing! It’s not about pointing fingers at others it’s about seeing where we fall short and where we can improve. I’m not minimizing how hard the npd must work I’m not minimizing the abuse the narcissist can render. I just believe more in the Hope that divinity can heal us IF we want to be healed. I love love love this mans take - I listen to so many views on this subject and they just demonize the narcissist - this is what is missing in all of those - hope divinity the possibility of overcoming one self by a power far greater than humans. Thank you thank you times ten for helping us “check” our selves for this threads of narcissism in ourselves. I will always be grateful for your thought .
What a beautiful series. Thank you for alll your efforts. Loving the connection back with the inner firoan/phroah and the verses of Quran youre linking your research back into. May your much needed work for our generation be received globally multifold. Amen
"Those who are not in alignment with nature/reality are in trouble." Wonderful video, thank-you for reminding us that no one is without some of these traits and to look inside for our "inner pharaoh". Refreshing and wise viewpoint, thank-you as always for your brilliant insights.
My experience is easily described as the most painful of my life without a doubt! You can't go through it without being changed! The giant was there and I accepted faith would sustain me. There is no retreat. I'm three years out but the anger sustains me still. The struggle now is the rebuilding. Have you noticed that many senior women are describing this abuse? (I'm a senior single female also)
Man- you have a gift of communicating complex (and interesting) ideas in a helpful way. “… the more shocking the reality check the more likely we have been ignoring the lighter reality checks we have been receiving.” Those “lighter reality checks” are the flaming red flags I have glibly blazed by in the past. Ha! Thank you for your content and hard work. Stay safe, Scottie
Your takes on narcissism are new, exciting, and interesting! It's nice to see someone approach mental illness multi-dimensionally (i.e looking at the complexities of this disorder, and laying out the many different ways thoughts and behaviors can manifest from this pathology) rather than most who just lay out symptoms, treatments, and red flags. Your return to youtube is highly appreciated!
1) I wish you would explain more fully what "the psyche fragments more easily" means. What normally holds the psyche together?
2) As a Catholic, I agree 100% with your observation that modern "horizontal" cultures are narcissistic.
Dr you are doing the lords work.
Also handsome messenger of knowledge ✍🏼🙏🏻🎚
Wow this is so unique!!! Thank you for your wisdom. I've often talked to my therapist about not experiencing much anger at all on my journey. ✨
Dr. Abdul, you blessed soul. Thank you for the balanced perspective you so selflessly share with us. God bless you.
Thank you for this enlightenment. And a reality check.
Peace.
I really appreciate you + your offerings. I love that you focus on self-reflection, self-awareness, and personal spiritual applications. The context you provide as well as the understanding of the spectrum of narcissistic/borderline/codependent expressions is very helpful. Thank you for this thoughtful + balanced perspective. Sending you lots of Love 💚💙💚
Dr Abdul this is so brilliant looking at the narcissism within all of humanity. I know the “blunt instrument “ is truth and I cannot shy away from it when dealing with my personal growthThankyou 💐
Loving this series...I have a Buddhist meditation practice which helps ground/stabilise me and in developing qualities of love and compassion, but in everyday life when I'm triggered, the reactivity of my narcissist traits is turbo charged and burns up spiritual progress.... the terrorist is flying the plane and it's so hard to find a way back to basic sanity! All your advice and insights are very much appreciated and I look forward to more teachings 😁
So good to have you back. Thank you for enabling my new level of peaceful, uplifted understanding of self and others at that invaluable spiritual level. Love and appreciate your wisdom. 🙏💜🍀
Best spiritual description of narcissism
What a breath of fresh air this is! Total reality check. Thank you.
Tremendous video, insight, and love how you orient this information practically at the ending
Thank you for your perspective on self hate or faults. I am guilty of this to a greater extent than I wish to acknowledge; however, your words bring me comfort as I work through this trait. Dr. Saad, thank you for videos and channel because this channel makes the viewer search within themselves for a better personal future.
I am so relieved to find someone addressing these issues from a more spiritual perspective. “What triggers my narcissism.” Now that is a useful question. I’m so grateful to you for these videos. Much love to you! Going to listen to 3rd video now! 🙏🏼
You really drove it home at the end of this video!! Many thsnks. 🙏🏽
Dr Saad, it is very good to have you back. I cannot express how happy I am .. it's a pleasure to listen and learn from your lectures. Keep them coming. Stay blessed
It's not only possible but inevitable that we transcend the ego mind. It's our destiny, to know "the peace that surpasses understanding."
I agree, good to see/hear you again. It's been almost 2 years since I hit the net to understand wtf had just happened to me. You were one of first vids I watched: all I heard was "rest and digest" as a way to cope with the sudeen, incoherent trauma. I haven't stopped repeating that matra. And Voila! full circle here you are w an amazing vid that matches my new level of psycho-philosophical understanding and 75% healed-ness. Thank you, kind sir.
Wow! 🙏. I’ve listened to this 3 times already!!
it amazes me that for all the pain they cause everyone else its the one thing they can't face. i can't even grasp not being able to introspect....especially when those around you are harmed...in most cases the same peope who only tried to help and care about you. i will never understand this disorder. i've been dealing with this my entire life. to choose to project and harm your own children rather than simply going for therapy is something i cant grasp when their victims endure far more pain than they carry and we have no choice BUT to deal with it and constantly. also, we have a right to be angry about abuse. i dont consider my rightful anger over being mistreated a narcissistic injury..in this case everyone then is a narcissist which isn't true. everyone has anger about something. i would consider trivial anger a problem but not anger over this form of abuse.
Abdul,
Thank you. These are profound insights; they begin to peel back the layers of the spiritual nature of our personalities. Many of these truths are very hard to accept but do line up so well with reality. Your work/labor is very helpful and thank you so much for making it available to so many like me who could otherwise not afford to receive it.
Blessings.
Wow.
This and part 1. were food for my soul! Thank you so much for taking the time to organize and link this information.
I am finally working on healing my wounds caused by a narcissistic parent who abused me since ever, and now that I too have a child I wonder often if I am displaying those traits, if I am hurting my child.
This series definitely helped me to understand better how to deal with myself and understand myself a little more.
How does codependency fits into all this? Borderline and codependency has some similarities?
@@Puuws thank you your explanation, I see alot of me in the codep not wanting to walk away due to feeling deep guilt, that's my RC indoctrination, Christianity institutionalised guilt as a virtue. I finally got it and moved on. Thank you again for sharing your insights.
I've been suspicious I have borderline for several years and I feel more certain about it as I get older. I tried to tell my therapist, but it would have taken decades of unpacking that I felt I didn't have the energy for; he was fairly insistent I didn't have bpd or npd. My reflection on it has felt mostly therapeutic and I know relinquishing unfounded senses of control has been integral to living with that "emptiness."
I am truly enjoying this intersectional study of npd. In the past 4 years I have been in 2 relationships with people with npd, one that was formally diagnosed and omitted that information, and one who was aware but undiagnosed. That experience left me feeling ego-dead and with severe panic disorder.
The input of minds like your own, lots of inner child therapy, and even more music therapy I thought would help me overcome that trauma, but surprisingly to me it dug deeper and has helped my identity feel less disjointed. I feel more consistent than I have felt since early childhood and the panic attacks are almost wholely gone. When I read there was no cure for bpd I in many ways buckled down to just be this way, but to know that there were ways to soothe my inner child and build stronger connections between them the adult and the warrior has been entirely transformative. I guess I am saying I am beyond appreciative, the love is mutual. God bless.
Thank you for this insight- May God be with you during yet another lockdown 🙏🙂
Wow! Have not been to your channel for couple of years. Was one of the early subscribers, 20k or so if I remember correctly...... you are going deep now, I’ll have to go back and listen to all I’ve been missing.
Thank you for the time and the care used to create your videos. You're a treasure!
Pure gold...The questions!
Thanks Dr.
For speaking with us so well.
Excellent. Many similar videos are big triggers for me. Your description & scientific thoughtfulness is appreciated. Thank you.
Love your perspective Abdel! Next for you: Professor at the university. Love, Monica, Norway.
good to have you back, man.
Thank you. This gives me great hope
Hi welcome back
I haven't looked at or done narc research for over a year, I think this is a positive sign for my journey. I would like to see more videos on how to be able to co exist with a narc. This is because it is possible and there's lots of info of the Psyche of narcs bit not practical methods of day to day living. I say this because I saw someone who doesn't believe in the no contact and it is possible. I saw it was no communication about self to narc rather than no contact. Amazing experience
I was in such a relationship but I am now in the healing process the Lord even showed me it is a process but He will heal us.....l think though this was a journey God really protected me and walked me through....He really did preserved me....and I am so thankful to Him. Now I can help persons who going though this and help them identify the red flags before it is to late. For the latest ones I do encourage them.
I see kratos has retreated to a quiet life as a clinical psychologist. Thats amazing.
Unable to receive criticism. That’s the key!
My rage kicked in when my boss tried to tell me I did not have long covid symptoms, after a work colleague complained about me talking about it.
11 years of hearing his toxic opinion just poured out of me sideways and I spoke to him in the most extreme way. It was soo extreme, he was unable to see the mirror I was inadvertently holding up. He sacked me on the spot and I now understand how impacting gaslighting can be. Being told I'm wrong is fine. Being told I'm imagining things, despite my due diligence was like a volcano eruption within me.
Great lesson. Toxic people must be dealt with properly, tactically. No illusions. Unfortunately, there is SO much bad advice out there on how to do it. As you found out, ignoring the problem doesn't work...
I am glad you are back .
Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge and awareness with us. God bless you.
Great video! Good questions. Thank you.
The control pathway in the brain has an inverse relation to the anxiety pathway in the brain.
This guy is a true genius
Soooooo glad you're back. We need you. I will be setting up an appointment soon. Much 💘
Thank you so much! Hope to stay well.. It’s awful being cooped up! You’re vids are very appreciated🌻
I was able to get myself away. But my 15yr old daughter is still with both of us individually every 2nd week; we separated 3 & 1/2yrs ago, but we still have a court date at the end October /21. Were you really really starting to impact our daughter. What can I do re:
My ex: it was finances & being disrespected.
Mine was: my calling. my passion & being disrespected.
I went from the 4 time Canadian Champion in American style rhythm and ballroom dancing when we met, getting diagnosed with MS when we got engaged and now 20 years later my MS has progressed enough that I am disabled using a walker and just about to receive my motorized wheelchair.
Im know teaching people like me w/ MS or any neurological illness. A dance program called Moovin and Groovin’ for people with a disability or in a wheelchair.
Great video, thanks God for your life and wisdom. Hugs from Brazil 🇧🇷
Brilliant. Thank you. 😃
Wow..... just wow these were somethings I was working on myself I'm glad to know that I'm working on the right stuff lol
Outstanding. As usual. Thank you for your work 🙏
Excellent stuff.
Sorry. Some purposeful abuse and inflicted resentment from one's own family lasts a lifetime. All the clinical and pharmaceutical therapies can't heal the affected brain and broken heart.
I agree 💕
Powerful powerful message. Thank you Dr Saad 🙏😊
Oh so very helpful necessary & helpful in helping understanding & more. Thank you from my ♥ & soul
Brilliant!
What I judge in others exists unseen and ignored in myself.
Regarding Gordon Ramsay and his show: is it not true that the show itself is attractive to the narcissistic self? He is, after all, the protagonist in the drama, the person who is able to denigrate and humiliate chefs whose culinary techniques he deems inferior. Do not viewers identify with him, does he not assuage the desire to be grandiose? For me this raises the question: if the dynamics of the show are analogous to that in which the disordered narcissist finally encounters “reality”, could one not suppose that our identification with Ramsay (rather than with the precious contestants) in that encounter is a form of resistance to the inevitability of the narcissist meeting his/her match?
Wonderful.
I believe the narcissist coworker who had me idealised demonstrates both BPD and narcissistic traits. As examples, she saw rejection when none was intended and wanted to control this so backed off with her love bombing. At the same time, although the vulnerable type, occasionally the grandiosity would appear from nowhere. She is exceptionally sensitive to criticism.
Hello from Maine
Brilliant .been writing about Pharaoh and Moses .. pharaoh the individual and or pharaoh the system
Great video!
The beard is savage! 😂
Ty, ty.
Thank you Dr. Saad. Know thyself… the shadow. I’d love to hear more about working with the shadow.
Doctor I'm sorry but you are wrong about Australia doing well; taking into consideration the large numbers of stranded Australians around the world, being denied their basic rights and all.
Lovely perspective about narcissism
Thank you
Good to see you back...hope life is OK with you 😁
15:35 I like that part ❤