1. You have to fundamentally trust them 2. You have to be able to negotiate with them 3. You have to be able to fight with them 4. You have to be able to make up with them 5. You have to be attracted to each other 6. You have to be friends and share some activities together 7. You have to have similarity in personality 8. You have to have a shared vision of the future 9. You have to have enough shared beliefs to run a household together
3:20 The personality aspect is *quite* important in my view. Jordan talks about differences in extroversion vs introversion; agreeableness vs disagreeableness; high openness vs low openness; conscientiousness, industriousness, and degree of chaos. But you don't want both to be high in neuroticism.
Also a very valueble thing to keep in sight is how your partner is treating their friends and how is she expecting you to treat your friends during your time of dating. It not healthy to neglect friendships during this time. If he/she is doing that or expecting this from you then it shows they are not the best in investing in relationships or are easily to abandon something if they find a better resource of fulfillment. Also ask her friends if they have memorable moment if your dating partner. These stories can show you alot of their caracter.
I love the list he gave. What's funny is the fact that my partner and I did the Big 5 Personality Test and BDSM test after our first or second date. It gave us a huge insight of each other. We realised that we were quite well balanced despite our differences and we were similar in many ways that matter. Opposites really do attract but fundamentally, both partners should have very similar core values and morals. The difference is what makes you stronger, and it's your similarities that bind you together.
So if you do decide to marry someone you have to be on the same page and share the same philosophies Another words be each other's team make and best friends?
Jordan answers this very incredibly and incredibly complicated question quite 'analytically' correct, I would estimate. But the funny part is at the very end, when in conclusion he states, "that's a lot of things", quite matter of factly. What he is really saying in that quick moment is this, 'how to know if she is the one is a Rubic's cube of factors". Solve the cube and you win. But spin the cube round and arrive at a solution and just miss by one square, and, "well", you got a LOT of things right and just one small thing wrong and now the submarine is sinking to the depths and there is not a DAMN thing you can do to stop implosion. Been there, done that.
Aleksa Petrović Okay.... First of all ...he doesn’t even answer the question... How do you vet a potential mate? You might notice that he does this often with questions. He wanders off in any direction he feels like. He jumps to ´You need to trust the other person ´. This is about seven stages after you have vetted the person. Then he says ´sexual attraction certainly helps’. WELL NO SH#T SHERLOCK. He has only dealt with individuals as a clinical psychologist. He’s never done couple’s therapy so he doesn’t actually know anything about it. I would have far more respect for him if he just honoured his own limitations instead of pretending to know everything about everything. This pattern of his is counterproductive. This is why he’s got labelled a media pundit and demigod. There’s nothing more attractive than humility. A man as intelligent and professionally competent as him should know that.
@@robertmoffat5149 he was asked a question and is giving his best version of the answer. You can't knock him for that, and just because he seems to go around the houses with the answer doesn't mean he hasn't answered it
@@Steve-ArfArf I sincerely mean no disrespect Steve, but did you sleep through school? Do you know the meaning of giving a clear and direct answer to a simple question, or the converse which is to obfuscate a question and talk around it? I'm just curious.
1. You have to fundamentally trust them
2. You have to be able to negotiate with them
3. You have to be able to fight with them
4. You have to be able to make up with them
5. You have to be attracted to each other
6. You have to be friends and share some activities together
7. You have to have similarity in personality
8. You have to have a shared vision of the future
9. You have to have enough shared beliefs to run a household together
I have met a person who has all those checked out except for 5 and 6 . Is that bust?
@@doubletrouble786 yes
@@doubletrouble786 Yes
@@doubletrouble786 same here man :(
Yes. It is. Find one that has all 9. There out there. I promise.
There's a really small number of people whose relationship advice I would trust. Dr. Peterson is one of them.
Same here.
“So that’s a lot of things..” lol true but this wise man knows how to put it in such a way it’s so understandable
3:20 The personality aspect is *quite* important in my view. Jordan talks about differences in extroversion vs introversion; agreeableness vs disagreeableness; high openness vs low openness; conscientiousness, industriousness, and degree of chaos. But you don't want both to be high in neuroticism.
100% accurate on all of the points!
I was happy to see this video today.
And I'm happy to see this comment.
Also a very valueble thing to keep in sight is how your partner is treating their friends and how is she expecting you to treat your friends during your time of dating. It not healthy to neglect friendships during this time. If he/she is doing that or expecting this from you then it shows they are not the best in investing in relationships or are easily to abandon something if they find a better resource of fulfillment.
Also ask her friends if they have memorable moment if your dating partner. These stories can show you alot of their caracter.
The best advice for knowing if your partner “is the one”
I love the list he gave. What's funny is the fact that my partner and I did the Big 5 Personality Test and BDSM test after our first or second date. It gave us a huge insight of each other. We realised that we were quite well balanced despite our differences and we were similar in many ways that matter. Opposites really do attract but fundamentally, both partners should have very similar core values and morals. The difference is what makes you stronger, and it's your similarities that bind you together.
To be fair, he really hits most of points.
I feel so alone so sad .
Wow, that was... hopeless! i am doomed as i already feel like i dont fit into the society as it is today!
You don't need to match with the society ! It only takes that one person who fits you.
So needed that advice from you Dr. Peterson 🙏💞✌🏼☺️
I like your perspective you’re a very intelligent man!
Im confused with the last thing he mentioned: shared values? Anyone have any recommendations to learn abt that
So if you do decide to marry someone you have to be on the same page and share the same philosophies Another words be each other's team make and best friends?
Jordan answers this very incredibly and incredibly complicated question quite 'analytically' correct, I would estimate. But the funny part is at the very end, when in conclusion he states, "that's a lot of things", quite matter of factly. What he is really saying in that quick moment is this,
'how to know if she is the one is a Rubic's cube of factors". Solve the cube and you win. But spin the cube round and arrive at a solution and just miss by one square, and, "well", you got a LOT of things right and just one small thing wrong and now the submarine is sinking to the depths and there is not a DAMN thing you can do to stop implosion. Been there, done that.
Thank you Dr!!!
Amazing
you could here some bias in openess haha
I like Peterson but he knows f#ck all about relationships.
Rather... he hasn't thought very deeply about them obviously.
Explain
Aleksa Petrović Okay....
First of all ...he doesn’t even answer the question... How do you vet a potential mate? You might notice that he does this often with questions. He wanders off in any direction he feels like. He jumps to ´You need to trust the other person ´. This is about seven stages after you have vetted the person. Then he says ´sexual attraction certainly helps’. WELL NO SH#T SHERLOCK.
He has only dealt with individuals as a clinical psychologist. He’s never done couple’s therapy so he doesn’t actually know anything about it.
I would have far more respect for him if he just honoured his own limitations instead of pretending to know everything about everything.
This pattern of his is counterproductive. This is why he’s got labelled a media pundit and demigod. There’s nothing more attractive than humility. A man as intelligent and professionally competent as him should know that.
Aleksa Petrović So?
Does that adequately explain??
@@robertmoffat5149 he was asked a question and is giving his best version of the answer. You can't knock him for that, and just because he seems to go around the houses with the answer doesn't mean he hasn't answered it
@@Steve-ArfArf I sincerely mean no disrespect Steve, but did you sleep through school?
Do you know the meaning of giving a clear and direct answer to a simple question, or the converse which is to obfuscate a question and talk around it?
I'm just curious.